Maintaining the Right Relationships

The Weekend of October 13th & 14th, 2012

Why Is Today’s Study Important?

As adults, we often live with stressed and even ruined relationships. We need

forgiveness and help in managing relationships in a godly manner. This

study will focus on Jesus’ teaching about having right relationships with ourselves,

with others and with God.

Don’t Be HypocriticalMatthew 7:1-5

1 "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. 3 "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?

Don’t Be Hypocritical4 How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.

Don’t Be HypocriticalA. Do you know what fractures many good

relationships? Harsh and critical judgments; But is that our job? Our job isn’t to judge others for their

shortcomings but to help them do better.

B. Jesus points to a better approach – Do not judge another believer at all.

Don’t Be HypocriticalC. What does Jesus mean by "judge?"

i. To be judgmental or harshly critical of one another.

ii. If we judge others, we will be judged on that same basis.

iii. We all live in glass houses so to speak and should be careful about throwing stones lest we become targets ourselves.

Don’t Be HypocriticalD. It is easy to see others’ faults. But rather

than pounce on them, Jesus wants us to: examine our own hearts and lives to see where

we fall short; and confess and repent of them before God; That's what Jesus means to get the “log out of

our own eye.”

Log & Speck

Billi

ons

Don’t Be HypocriticalE. Jesus says we must first take care of our

own log before attempting to help a brother or sister with their "speck problem." Otherwise…

F. But when we openly acknowledge how far short we are of God’s standards, we are prepared to help others with their struggle.

“I Can’t See the Forest, for the Trees.”

Like the old saying goes, "logs" come in many shapes, sizes, and descriptions, but all distort our vision of ourselves and of others. Funny thing about logs—we have more trouble seeing our own logs than we do seeing another’s speck.

“I Can’t See the Forest for the Trees.”

Ask your spouse or a trusted friend to help you identify any log in your life that hinders your effort to develop right relationships, then work to whittle that log down in size. Removing those "trees" in our lives helps us to see the forest more clearly.

Discern Rightly

Matthew 7:6 6 "Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces.

Discern Rightly1. When my brothers and I were growing up,

our family had several pet dogs. Some died chasing trucks on the road. If you are a dog lover, you understand.

2. In Jesus' day, people did not have pet dogs. Instead, the dogs He was talking about were half-wild, snarling, scavenging dogs that ran in packs.

Discern Rightly1. In Jesus’ day, pigs were

despised animals.2. God loves everyone

and wants to forgive their sins, not everyone will receive these holy gifts. Some people will want nothing to do with God.

Discern Rightly

1. In Jesus day, after people worshiped in the Temple, they received a portion of the meat offered to God to enjoy with their family. Themeat sacrificed on the altar was considered holy, but would the dogs understand that?

Discern RightlyF. What if you placed

precious and valuable pearls before some wild pigs, would they “ooh” and “ah” over them, delighting in their beauty and worth?

Discern RightlyG.THE POINT: some people are simply not

ready for the gospel. If we encounter a strong negative response,

forcing the issue could do more harm than good.

Later on, the person may be more open and receptive to the message.

If we were to plow ahead blindly, enough resentment could build and close that person’s mind and heart for good.

Discern Rightly1. Obeying Jesus doesn’t mean “being mean

or ugly” to those who reject the gospel. Remember, He also taught us to love our enemies.

Receive and Show GraceMatthew 7:7-12

7 "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. 9"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?

Receive and Show Grace11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 12 So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.

Receive and Show GraceA. Jesus did not suggest we pray. He outright

commanded it by saying we are “ask, search and knock.” In fact a better translation would be “Keep asking …. Keep searching …. Keep knocking."

B. Jesus assures us that in asking, we will receive; in searching, we will find; and in knocking, the door will open.

Receive and Show GraceC. Our heavenly Father doesn’t play favorites.Everyone who…

asks - receives; searches – finds; knocks – opens;

So, why don’t we pray more?

Throughout my ministry, I spend a lot of time doing “church work.” I strategized, planned, organized, enlist workers, trained them, and work like crazy to do the Lord’s work. And I did pray; but often that seemed more a formality than a power source. My programs and projects had success, but the number of truly transformed lives was small. Why?

So, why don’t we pray more?

Would your work or school day be different if you prayed more? The same divine grace that saved us, can also enable us to be more of what God saved us to be. We can’t do it on our own. Why not make a commitment right now to pray each day for just 10 minutes.

Jesus says it will make a big difference!

Receive and Show Grace1. Our fathers, even though imperfect,

respond kindly to their children’s requests. They wouldn't think of giving their kids something worthless or even dangerous.

2. Our heavenly Father doesn’t play tricks on us either. Better than our earthly fathers, our heavenly Father desires only what is “good, pleasing, and perfect” for us.

Receive and Show GraceF. Jesus concludes His sermon with the

Golden Rule. In a nutshell, here’s how to keep the Law and the Prophets:

Treat others as you want them to treat you. While this is concise and simple, it is incredibly

demanding. We need God’s grace for this, so let’s regularly

ask, seek and knock for it.

Receiving & Giving GraceWhen people treat us as they would want

to be treated, we say they have given us grace. Sometimes it's grace we did not expect. When have you received unexpected grace recently?

How might you extend grace the next time to someone who might not be expecting it?