The Art of Parenting—3 e-mail ACParenting@gmail.com Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV) last updated 6/30/18

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The Art of Parenting – 3 Applying Discipline

Handout adapted from FamilyLife’s Art of Parenting™ Workbook Handout can be downloaded at www.AustinChristianParenting.com/the-art-of-parenting/

Key Scripture

Deuteronomy 5:29 “Oh, that their hearts would be inclined to fear me and keep all my commands always, so that it might go well with them and their children forever!”

Heart Scriptures

Proverbs 4:23 “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

Proverbs 21:2 “A person may think their own ways are right, but the Lord weighs the heart.”

Proverbs 23:19 “Listen, my son, and be wise, and set your heart on the right path:”

Proverbs 23:26 “My son, give me your heart and let your eyes delight in my ways,”

Luke 6:45 “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” Key Idea

• The goal of discipline is heart transformation and spiritual formation Discussion Question

• What are three things you hope your kids learn before they leave your home?

Keys to Intentional Parenting 1

Parents need higher goals than just raising “good kids.”

Good behavior doesn’t always reveal a pure heart.

Be prepared to reward good behavior and attitudes.

Behavior Modification vs. Heart Transformation • The goal is heart transformation, not behavior modification • Parents need to be concerned about both the behavior and the motivation behind

the behavior • Concentrate on your child’s heart • Train kids to take hold of the promises of God • Teach them they need Jesus. The point of the law is to show us how much we need

a Savior. 1 Art of Parenting Workbook, (FamilyLife, 2018), p. 55.

The Art of Parenting—3 e-mail ACParenting@gmail.com Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV) last updated 6/30/18

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Excerpt taken from pages 66-67 of FamilyLife’s Art of Parenting™ Workbook. Take Aim: What’s in Your Heart?

• Read the “Heart Scriptures” above. In your own words, summarize what stands out to you and how you would communicate it to your kids.

________________________________________________________________________ Discussion Question

• How do you transform the heart of your children?

Effective Means of Discipline • When it comes to disciplining, God is our example • Spanking is just one means of discipline, and should not always be used • The path of discipline can be other than physical • Properly administered, discipline builds security in the heart of a child • Catch them doing something right

Take Aim: Choosing the Best Approach to Discipline

• Write out 3 of your best discipline tools

1. _____________________________________________________________ 2. _____________________________________________________________

3. _____________________________________________________________

The Art of Parenting—3 e-mail ACParenting@gmail.com Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV) last updated 6/30/18

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Discussion Questions

• What are your best discipline tools? • What are some creative disciplinary ideas?

• What are some situationally appropriate ideas to discipline?

• How do you approach discipline with your teenager?

Blended Family Emphasis: Being flexible to pull back and reboot after realizing a mistake is critical to parenting in blended families. What mistakes have you made (individually or as a couple) and what would it look like to reboot? This Week at Home: Arrow Project Three – Applying Discipline

Do this project can be done online at www.FamilyLife.com/parenting/ Sign into your individual account, go to session 3, and in the right sidebar, click on:

In this project, you will

• Evaluate how well you are modeling positive characteristics to your children

Honest Trustworthy Shows respect for others Accepting Content Calm Teachable Obedient Shows love Peaceful Gentle Patient Kind Joyous Faithful Self-Controlled

• Determine your child’s character and strengths

The answers will be transferred to section F – “Your Child’s Character” – on each child’s arrow chart. Go online at FamilyLife.com/parenting to access age-graded video discussions, articles, and other resources to help with your parenting questions and challenges. Recommended Resources

FamilyLife's Art of Parenting™ Small-Group Series Workbook

https://shop.familylife.com/p-5257-familylifes-art-of-parenting-small-group-series-workbook.aspx

The Art of Parenting: Aiming Your Child’s Heart Toward God

by Dennis and Barbara Rainey (Bethany House Publishers, 2018)