doing conflict well joe gerstandt #shrmdiv

conflict done wellFight. More. Better.

@joegerstandt #shrmdiv

“We need in every community a

group of angelic troublemakers.”

Bayard Rustin

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MT

engineers

MT

management

MT

engineers

MT

management

MT

engineers

NASA

management

Tuesday

morning

January

28th

1986

MT

management

MT

engineers

NASA

management

MT

management

NASA

management

g

r

o

u

p

t

h

i

n

k

groupthink:

mode of thinking that happens

when the desire for harmony in a

decision-making group overrides a

realistic appraisal of alternatives.

Group members try to minimize

conflict and reach a consensus

decision without critical evaluation

of alternative ideas or viewpoints.

consider

decision

making… 1 - 10

What

makes it

better?

We simply decide

without thinking

much about the

decision process.-Jim Nightingale

Group vs. Individual Decision Making

groups individuals

accuracy

speed

creativity

degree of

acceptance

efficiency


groups individuals

accuracy x

speed x

creativity x

degree of

acceptancex

efficiency x

Groups often fail to

outperform individuals

because they prematurely

move to consensus, with

dissenting opinions being

suppressed or dismissed.

-Hackman, Morris (1975) Advances in Experimental

Social Psychology


groups individuals

accuracy x

speed x

creativity x

degree of

acceptancex

efficiency x

Group intelligence is

not strongly tied to

either the average

intelligence of the

members or the team’s

smartest member.-Thomas Malone, MIT Center for Collective

Intelligence

Minority dissent, even

dissent that is wrong,

stimulates divergent thought.

Issues and problems are

considered from more

perspectives and group

members find more correct

answers.-Nemeth, Staw (1989) Advances in Experimental

Social Psychology

low

belongingness

high

belongingness

low value in

uniqueness

high value in

uniqueness

low

belongingness

high

belongingness

low value in

uniqueness

high value in

uniqueness

inclusion:Individual is treated as

an insider and also

allowed/encouraged to

retain uniqueness within

the work group.

low

belongingness

high

belongingness

low value in

uniqueness

exclusion:Individual is not treated

as an organizational

insider with unique

value in the work group

but there are other

employees or groups

who are insiders.

high value in

uniqueness


an insider and also



the work group.

low

belongingness

high

belongingness

low value in

uniqueness



insider with unique


but there are other

employees or groups

who are insiders.

high value in

uniqueness

differentiation:Individual is not treated


insider in the work

group but their unique

characteristics are seen

as valuable and required

for group / organization

success.


an insider and also



the work group.

low

belongingness

high

belongingness

low value in

uniqueness



insider with unique


but there are other

employees or groups

who are insiders.

assimilation:Individual is treated as

an insider in the work

group when they conform

to org. / dominant culture

norms and downplay

uniqueness.

high value in

uniqueness

differentiation:Individual is not treated


insider in the work

group but their unique

characteristics are seen

as valuable and required

for group / organization

success.


an insider and also



the work group.

Is it safe to be

unpopular?

@joegerstandt #SHRMDIV

“Trust

precedes the

truth.”

Is there a

penalty for

candor?

Are there

things we do

not discuss?

War for

talent?

dysfunction

dysfunctional disagreement

dysfunctional agreement


also

dysfunction




always

disagree lack of

trust

personal

conflict

us vs.

them




always

disagree lack of

trust

personal

conflict

us vs.

them

always

agreelack of

honesty

meeting

after the

meeting

lacking

skills




sweet

spot

#1: champion decision making

How do we

make

decisions

here?

#2:

champion

the

container

How are we

going to be

here?

• agreements & commitments

• objectives

• process expectations

• participation expectations

divergent convergent

• explore

• imagine

• novelty

• defer judgment

• combine / integrate

• enlarge

• “yes” “and”

• clarify

• reduce

• categorize

• rate

• select

• cluster

• judge

#3: champion assertive

communication

low courage high courage

low

considerationpassive

aggressive

aggressive

high

considerationpassive assertive

passive:

• do not assert themselves

• allow others to deliberately or

inadvertently infringe on their rights

• fail to express their feelings, needs,

or opinions

• tend to speak softly or apologetically

• exhibit poor eye contact and slumped

body posture

aggressive:

• try to dominate others

• use humiliation to control others

• criticize, blame, or attack others

• speak in a loud, overbearing voice

• not listen well

• interrupt frequently

• use “you” statements

passive-aggressive:

• mutter to themselves rather than confront

the person or issue

• have difficulty acknowledging their anger

• use facial expressions that don't match

how they feel - i.e., smiling when angry

• use sarcasm

• appear cooperative while purposely doing

things to annoy and disrupt

• use subtle sabotage to get even

assertive:

• state needs, feelings and wants

clearly and respectfully

• use “I” statements

• listen well without interrupting

• have good eye contact

• speak in a calm, clear tone of voice

• have a relaxed body posture

• not allow others to abuse them

listen

actively

ask good

open

ended

questions

convey & invite

express clearly and

completely

third

chair

#4:

champion

having a

beginner’s

mind


high

difference

low

difference

high

interaction

learning

growth

self-organization

stress

conflict

exhaustion

celebration

reinforcement

energy

low productivity

wasted energy

factions

low

interaction

reflection

safety

clearing the decks

isolation

misunderstanding

frustration

comfort

belonging

rest and recovery

boredom

stagnation

deathDifference Matrix

Glenda Eoyang HSDI

high

difference

low

difference

high

interaction

move to low difference:Tell a joke.

State a shared value or

belief.

Share personal experience.

Pick a low difference topic.

move to low

interaction:Stop communicating.

Leave the area.

Explain yourself.

Pick a low

communication topic.

low

interaction

move to high

interaction:Ask a question.

Use another medium.

Listen more.

Pick a high communication

topic.

move to high

difference:Amplify little

differences

Play devils advocate

Pick a high difference

topicDifference Matrix

Glenda Eoyang HSDI

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[email protected]

twitter.com/joegerstandt

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402.740.7081

Go make

more

trouble!

resources• The Difference: How the Power of Diversity

Creates Better Groups, Firms, Schools, and Societies | Scott Page

• The Wisdom of Crowds | James Surowiecki

• A Whole New Mind | Daniel Pink

• The Medici Effect | Frans Johansson

• The Geography of Thought | Richard Nisbett

resources• Achieving Success Through Social

Capital: Tapping Hidden Resources in Your Personal and Business Network | Wayne E. Baker

• The Whole Brain Business Book Ned Herrmann

• Competitive Advantage Through People: Unleashing the Power of the Work Force | Jeffrey Pfeffer