what is marriage and family

8/13/2019 What is Marriage and Family

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PART I

GETTING TO KNOW MARRIAGE


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WHAT IS MARRIAGE

?


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MARRIAGE

Marriage is a specialcontract of permanentunion between a man anda woman entered into inaccordance with law forthe establishment of

conjugal and family life. Itis the foundation of thefamily and an inviolablesocial institution whosenature, consequences, andincidents, are governed bylaw and not subject to

stipulation, except thatmarriage settlements mayfix the property relationsduring the marriage withinthe limits provided by thisCode. (FCP Art. 1.)

For matrimonial consent to

exist, it is necessary that

the contracting parties be

at least not ignorant of the

fact that marriage is a

permanent partnership

between a man and a

woman, ordered to the

procreation of children

through some form of

sexual cooperation. (CCLArt. 1096)


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MARRIAGE

The matrimonial covenant by whicha man and a woman establishesbetween themselves a partnership ofthe whole life, is by its nature orderedtowards the good of the spouses andthe procreation and education ofoffspring this covenant betweenbaptized persons has been raised byChrist the Lord to the dignity of asacrament. (CCC 1601)


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PROFOUND REALITIES OF MARRIAGE

MARRIAGE

A DivineInstitution

Sacred

Reality

A Human

Institution

A State

Human

Secular

Reality


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PROFOUND REALITIES OF MARRIAGE

MARRIAGE

A PersonalAffair A Contract

A Covenant

A Social

Institution

An Event


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IN THE FILIPINO CONTEXT

Most Filipinos today have a deeper appreciation for personalfreedom and the quality of interpersonal relationship withinmarriage

Marriage is an affair not only of two individuals but also betweentwo family groups


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IN THE FILIPINO CONTEXT

Marriage and family then are among our highest cultural values

HOWEVER

there is a growing weakening of the Filipino family and marriagetoday.


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Where does the real problem lie?

Common overstress of romantic love

Personal sexual fulfillment in marriageSecularized modern world

Break down of traditional, moral, and religious values

THERE IS A Gap Between church teachings on marriage and whatappears to be the common practice of many Filipino Catholics


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WHAT IS NEEDED?


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THE PURPOSE OF MARRIAGE IN CREATION

Stages of Marriage in Human History:

Prefigured

Creation

Adam & Eve

THE PROMISE

Prepared

O.T.

Israelites

- Moses

- Prophet Hosea

By Jesus

THE FULFILLMENT

Instituted

N.T.

Continued

&

Applied

By the CHURCH

THE CODE OF

CANON LAW


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In the Bible are found two accounts

of the Creation, one is called thePriestly account (Gen. 1:1-31) and

the other is the Yahwist tradition

(Gen. 2:2-25). The two complementeach other and give a more detailed

view of Gods work.[Fr. Lana, OP, et al., 2004, p.9.]


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PRIESTLY

ACCOUNT

Equality

Between

GendersProcreation

Sexes/

Genders



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YAHWIST

ACCOUNT

Complemen-

tarityOneness/

Unitive

Companion-

ship



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1. Woman was not taken from the head ofman in order to show that men should not

rule over the woman.

Reasons behind woman being taken from

the rib of man.

2. Woman was not taken from the hands of

man in order to show that men should notuse the women

3. Woman was not taken from the feet of man

to show that men should not trample on

women.



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4. Instead, woman was taken from the ribs of

the man to show that they should always

walk side by side in mutual support ofeach other.

5. Woman was also taken from the ribs of

man because the ribs are closest to the

heart. This therefore signifies that men

should have women as the closest to their

heart to love and to care for the rest of

their lives.



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CONCLUSION: Two Purposes of Marriage

in GodsOriginal Plan:

1. Marriage is for Procreation. (Procreative)

2. Marriage is for the union between husband

and wife. (Unitive)



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CONSEQUENCES OF SIN IN MARRIAGE:

SOURCE: Genesis 3

1. The original communion between man,

woman, the other creatures and God was

destroyed.

- Man & woman hid themselves from God.- Man blamed (God) the woman for the sin.

- The woman in return blamed the snake.

THE ORIGINAL PURPOSE

AS DISTURBED BY SIN


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2. The mutual attraction between man andwoman was replaced by lust.

- Both of them realized that they were

naked and they felt shame.


AS DISTURBED BY SIN


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3. The equality between man and womanwas replaced with sexual hierarchy

(domination of man over woman).

- The woman was regarded as the causeof temptation.


AS DISTURBED BY SIN


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These consequences of original sin will have

a lasting effect in marriage as will be

found in mans history.


AS DISTURBED BY SIN


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The ideals of marriage in Genesis were not

achieved among Godschosen people.

Women were distinctly subordinated to men(second class). Their status was not only determined by their

relation to man (simply as wives, mothers,

sisters). Their primary function was to bear children to

continue the human generation.

Polygamous relationship was allowed.

MARRIAGE REALIZED AMONG

GODS CHOSEN PEOPLE


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The ideals of marriage in Genesis were not

achieved among Godschosen people.

Divorce was also permitted as long as it ison the initiative of the husband.

Barrenness was considered a disgrace. Men

with barren wives were allowed to have a

concubine as a substitute.

The existence of Levirate law.

MARRIAGE REALIZED AMONG

GODS CHOSEN PEOPLE


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The prophets, particularly Hosea, envisioned the

marriage between husband and wife as a

covenant showing the covenant between Godand His chosen people, the Israelites. (Just as

God remained faithful in His love for His

people, so should husbands and wives be faithful

to each other.)

It is faithful.

It is forgiving.

It is forever.

THE PROPHETIC VISION OF MARRIAGE


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MARRIAGE UNFOLDED IN THE N.T.

Christ came as our Redeemer.

He redeemed us from thebondage of sin in all its effects.

He, therefore, also redeemed

marriage and gave back its

original richness.


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1. Christ taught us the deeper meaning of

love.


MARRIAGE IN THE TEACHINGS

OF CHRIST

Source: John 15:12-14

Implication:

Christ has made the quality of his love for us as

the standard of true love. That is, love calls for

fidelity, unconditional surrender and forgiveness

in the instance of failure.


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2. Christ taught us the goodness and the

sacredness of marriage.


Source: John 2:1ff (The Wedding at Cana)

Implication:

He also confirmed the goodness of

marriage by being present in that

occasion.

He showed that He valued marriage by

doing something wonderful on that day

(His first miracle).


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3. Christ also confirmed the UNITIVE

dimension of marriage (the everlastingunion between husband and wife).


Source: Mark 10:1-12 (The Question about Divorce)

Implication:

Christs answer was no to divorce. Here, Jesus

affirmed the original plan of God in marriage:

that man and woman should be one (They are

no longer two but one bodyWhat God has

joined together, man must not put asunder.)


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He exalted the value of MARITAL

ACT/CONJUGAL ACT by referring to it as

THE RIGHT OF BOTH HUSBAND ANDWIFE. He calls this technically as a

MARITAL DEBT.



OF ST. PAUL

Source: 1 Corinthians 7:3-4


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2. He reiterated the UNITIVE aspect of

marriage by linking the union between

husband and wife to the love and everlastingunion between Christ and His spouse, the

Church. Husbands should love their wives

the way Christ loves His Church.



OF ST. PAUL

Source: Ephesians 5:25-27


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MARRIAGECelebration Covenant

Vocation

Contract

CHRISTIAN DIMENSIONS OF MARRIAGE


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COMPONENTS

1. It can only be entered into by a MAN & a

WOMAN.

2. It should be freely entered into by both parties

(Marital/Mutual Consent).

3. Although it has been from the freedom of both

spouses, they are subject to the purpose andproperties of marriage as instituted by God.

4. It is irrevocable, i.e., it is indissoluble or

permanent.


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ESSENTIAL PROPERTIES

1. It is lasting, forever binding and sacred, as

it were, marriage is the holy alliancebetween MAN, WOMAN and GOD.

2. It mirrors the covenant between God and

His people which have been enriched bythe covenant between Christ and His

Church, which is characterized by

sacr if ice, forgiveness, andfideli ty.


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Like the vocation to the priesthood and

single blessedness, marriage is also a

call by God to come to a closerunion with Him.

HOW?- Responsible Parenthood

- By the spouses bringing each other to God

- By their readiness to carry their crosses.


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Marriage is a joyous

celebration. And what adds

colors to the celebration is

the ceremony.


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The celebration of the

sacraments by the Christian

community is called

LITURGY.


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LITURGY In Greek, means publicservice.

It is the public celebration of the meeting of

God and his children through actions and words

along with signs and symbols.

Actions and words expresses the dialogue

between God and the people.

Signs and symbols, these perceptible

realities can become means of expressing

the action of God who sanctifies man and

the action of man who offer worship to God.


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LITURGY

Response of faith have to accompany

and make effective to the grace

already given in the celebration. AS

SUCH, required is a conscious, and

active participation among the faithful.


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SACRAMENT

is a saving symbolic act or visible sign

arising from the ministry of Christ andcontinued in, by and for the church, which

when received in faith, fashions us into the

likeness of Christ in His Paschal mystery

through the power of the Holy Spirit.


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But it is not something the couple

merely decides to do for themselves. It

is the church which provides thedetails of the basic ritual. In fact, the

church requires that the spouses-to-be

submit to the standard rite which callsfor a set liturgical form, otherwise

their marriage would be invalid.


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Wedding celebration marks the

solemn entry of the spouses into abinding commitment before God and

the Christian community. It is a public

declaration of their love-commitmentbefore Christ and the Church.


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Sacramental marriage is a liturgical act. It is

therefore appropriate that it should be

celebrated in the public liturgy of the church.Marriage introduces one into an ecclesial order,

and creates rights and duties in the church

between spouses towards children. Since

marriage is necessary (hence the obligation tohave witnesses). The public character of the

consent protects the I do once given, and

helps the spouses to remain faithful to it.[CCC 1631]

Th l i ti l f i th d th b id t


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The ecclesiastical form requires the groom and the bride toexpress freely and publicly their consent to take each other ashusband and wife before the presence of a priest and deacon,

and witnesses in these or similar words:

I take you as my lawful husband (or wife) accordingto the rites of holy Mother the Church.

I give myself to you as your lawful wife (orhusband).

I take you as my lawful husband (or wife).

These words however, may take the form of questions askedby the priest or deacon to which the groom and the bridenormally respond withI do.

Aft th h f th l t th L d


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After the exchange of vows, the couple prays to the Lordtogether:

Grant us, O Lord, to be one heartand one soul from this day forward,for better, for worse, for richer, for

poorer, in sickness and in health,until death do as part.

Since they are the ones who mutually confer upon each otherthe sacrament of matrimony, the husband and the wife arethe ministers of Christsgrace. The priest or the deacon whoassists the celebration receives the consent in the name of thechurch and gives the blessing.

VISIBLE SIGNS OF MATRIMONY


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MATTER

FORMMINISTERS



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M TTERThe church holds the exchange of

consent between the spouses to be theindispensable element that makes

marriage. If consent is lacking there is no

marriage.[CCC 1626]



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Matr imonial consent is an act of will by

which a man and a woman by an irrevocable

covenant mutually give and accept oneanother for the purpose of establishing a

marriage.[CIC 1057, 2]


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FORMThe sacrament of matrimony consists in

the mutual expression by both contracting

parties of their free consent to take each

other as husband and wife. The exchange of

I DO is the main act in the marriageceremony.[CIC 1057]



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MINISTERSThe ministers of Matrimony are the

contracting parties themselves, the bridegroom

and the bride. The priest stands as the witness

authorized by the church to be present and

bless the union. Hence, the priest becomes the

officiating minister who solemnizes

matrimony.[CIC 1057]

VISIBLE SIGNS OF MATRIMONY B id l P i


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VISIBLE SIGNS OF MATRIMONY Bridal Procession

White Gown

Rings

Candles

Joining of hands

Arrhae

Veil

Cord

SYMBOLS

Other Symbols

used in the

Celberat ion


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PROPERTIES OF MARRIAGE

1. Proles:: Openness to Fertility.

Biological Dimension: The capacity of the

husband and the wife to

procreate offspring through

sexual union.

ISSUE:: How about the infertile spouses?ANSWER: They are still open to fertility by

observing the natural laws and rhythm of

fertility. (Here, contraception is seen as the

tampering of this natural process of fertility.)


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2. Fides:: Unity and Fidelity

Couples must unite more intimately in theirrelationship (self-giving_.

It signifies Gods covenant which is

characterized with patience, understanding,

kindness and forgiveness.

To open up ones heart and extend ones

hand to a repentant beloved.


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3. Sacramentum:: Indissolubility and

Permanence

The indissolubility of marriage is possible

because God willed it so: Let no one

separate what God has joined.

WHO ARE AUTHORIZED TO SOLEMNIZE MARRIAGES?


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1. Any incumbent member of the judiciary within the

courtsjurisdiction;

2. Any priest, rabbi, imam, or minister of any church or

religious sect duly authorized by his church or

religious sect and registered with the civil registrargeneral, acting within the limits of the written

authority granted by his church or religious sect and

provided that at least one of the contracting parties

belongs to the solemnizing officers church or

religious sect;



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3. Any ship captain or airplane chief only in the case

mentioned in Article 31 of the Family Code;

4. Any military commander of a unit to which a

chaplain is assigned, in the absence of the latter,

during a military operation, likewise only in thecases mentioned in Article 32 of the Family Code;

5. Any consul-general, consul or vice-consul in the

case provided in Article 10 of the Family Code.

WHT ARE THE ESSENTIAL REQUISITES OF MARRIAGE?


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WHT ARE THE ESSENTIAL REQUISITES OF MARRIAGE?

No Marriage shall be valid, unless these essential

requites are present.

1. Legal capacity of the contracting parties who

must be a male and a female; and

2. Consent freely given in the presence of the

solemnizing officer.

WHAT ARE THE FORMAL REQUISITES OF MARRIAGE?


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WHAT ARE THE FORMAL REQUISITES OF MARRIAGE?

The formal requisites of marriage are:

1. Authority of the solemnizing officer

2. A valid marriage license except in the cases where

the same is exempted; and

3. A marriage ceremony which takes place with the

appearance of contracting parties before the

solemnizing officer and their personal declaration

that they take each other as husband and wife inthe presence of not less than two witnesses of

legal age.

HOW OLD MUST I BE TO GET VALIDLY MARRIED?


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HOW OLD MUST I BE TO GET VALIDLY MARRIED?

Any male or female of the age of eighteen years orupwards not under any of the impediments

mentioned in Articles 37 and 38, may contract

marriage.

WHICH MARRIAGES DOES THE LAW CONSIDER VOID


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FROM THE VERY BEGINNING?

1. Those contracted by any party below eighteen years ofage even with the consent of parents or guardians;

2. Those solemnized by any person not legally authorized

to perform marriages unless such marriages were

contracted with either or both parties believing in goodfaith that the solemnizing officer had the legal authority

to do so;

3. Those solemnized without license, except those covered

by the preceding Chapter;

4. Those bigamous or polygamous marriages not failing

under Article 41;



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5. Those contracted through mistake of one contractingparty as to the identity of the other; and

6. Those subsequent marriages that are void under Article

53.

7. A marriage contracted by any party who, at the time of

celebration, was psychologically incapacitated to comply

with the essential marital obligations of marriage, shall

likewise be void even if such incapacity becomes

manifest only after its solemnization.

8. Between ascendants and descendants of any degree;

and



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9. Between brothers and sisters, whether of the full or halfblood.

10. Between collateral blood relatives whether legitimate or

illegitimate, up to the fourth civil degree;.

11. Between step-parents and step-children;

12. Between parents-in-law and children-in-law;

13. Between the adopting parent and the adopted child;14. Between the surviving spouse of the adopted child and

the adopter;



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15. Between the surviving spouse of the adopted child andthe adopter;

16. Between an adopted child and a legitimate child of the

adopter;

17. Between adopted children of the same adopter;

18. Between parties where one, with the intention to marry

the other, killed that other personsspouse, or his or her

own spouse.


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CHURCH LAW ON MARRIAGE


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Pre-requisites for the Celebration of Marriage:

4. Banns Announcement either orally or in print in the

parishes of the contracting parties, normally for 3

consecutive Sundays or Holy Days of Obligation

before the wedding takes place..

5. Documents

Baptismal (and Confirmation) Certificates of both

parties

Marriage License

Permission to the Bridesparish priest

Parental consent

ESSENTIAL CHARACTERISTICS OF



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ESSENTIAL CHARACTERISTICS OF

THE CHURCH

Canonical Requirements:1. Permission to get married by the local ordinary.

2. The declaration and promise by the Catholic

party: Catholic party will declare removal of any danger of falling

away from faith;

Promise to do all power to have all the children baptized and

brought up on the Catholic Church.

The non-Catholic party should be informed of this promise.

Both parties are to be instructed about the purposes andessential properties of marriage.

3. The observance of the Canonical Form.


Mixed Marriages & Disparity of Cult:


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PART IIAPPRECIATING GODS DESIGN

FOR THE FAMILY


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The family is a universal and basic

element in society. It is the basic unit

which serves as the link between theindividual and society because every

persons earliest and longest experience

takes place within the family. Nothing

else can replace the family as a center

for the psycho-social development of

people and as the transmitter of culture.

THE FAMILY IN TODAYS REALITIES

DIFFERENT FORMS OF PRESSURES THAT THREATEN THE


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MATERIALISM

SECULARISM

HEDONISM CONSUMERISM

DIFFERENT FORMS OF PRESSURES THAT THREATEN THESTABILITY OF THE FAMILY

RESPONSE OF THE CHURCH: Renewal Movement


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RESPONSE OF THE CHURCH: Renewal Movement

The family and the Church play an important

role in the development of the community.

The family radiates Gods love.

The family is an

instrument of peace.

The family is PRO-LIFE.

(The family proclaims, celebrates, serves and nurtures life.)

The family is an agent of

transformation of civilization.

THE FAMILY AS A COMMUNITY OF LOVE AND LIFE


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THE FAMILY AS A COMMUNITY OF LOVE AND LIFE

CONJUGAL ACT: The Unifying Bond between

Husband and Wife

Fully Human

Total

Exclusive & Faithful until Death

Fecund

M

A

R

K

S

&

D

E

MA

N

D

S

PROMOTING PEACE AND JUSTICE IN THE FAMILY


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The family is the smallest social unit, the basic

component, and fundamental to the life of the

society. Likewise, the family is the first school of

humanity where the parents are first and

foremost educators of the child. The homeprepares the individual for the more demanding

relationship outside the family, for the strength of

a nation is parallel to the strength of its humanmembers. Indeed, the family is the first and the

vital cell of the society.


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S CO C O ?


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WHAT IS COMMUNICATION?

It is a Basic Human Desire to express

oneself whatever form it takes. One wants

to be listened to, to be understood, to be

recognized, to feel important to be in goodrelationship with others.

If there is anything that gives man his

special nature among all living things, it ishis ability to communicate. He is the only

living species with the power of speech.

3 STYLES OF COMMUNICATION


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DIALOGUE

DUOLOGUE

MONOLOGUE

TWO WAYS OF COMMUNICATION


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Verbal

Nonverbal

COMMUNICATION

BUILDING FAMILY RELATIONS


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1. Communicating non-verbally A powerful means to affirm ones spouse Ex.: gestures, postures, facial expression

COMMUNICATION: As an Expression of Mans Nature

2. Communicating as adults Intellectual stimulation and newness Ex.: sharing or exchanging ideas gathered

from their work/profession and interests

3. Communicating as children Bringing out the child in them Ex.: playfulness, creativity, wonder, laughter,

adventure



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7. Communicating mutual & diverse interests Source of stimulation and growth in

communication

COMMUNICATION: As an Expression of Mans Nature

8. Communicating socially Being-in-and-with-the-world Goes beyond the couples themselves to the

world outside and brings the couples intocommunication with others



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COMMUNICATION

Listening Non-verbal signals Directness Clarity

Husband-Wife Relation



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1. Communication builds up and develops anauthentic relationship between couples: Enables couples to express the love for

each other. Helps them keep in touch & support

their lives together as husband & wife.

Good communication minimizes &recognizes disagreements &differences.

Importance of Communication in Marriage



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2. Communication is a way of creating aclimate of faith, understanding and trustbetween couples:

Itis the breath of lifein marriage. Nomarriage will survive without it.

Good communication is a give and take;

listening and sharing. Open and honest communication putscharity, love , trust and faith intopractice.




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3. Prayer as communication with Godstrengthens the marriage (relationship)and enables one to discern Gods will in

lifesdaily events. In prayer, Godsgrace is also received. Communication with God in prayer is

spending quality time with himpersonally as a family (A family thatprays together, stays together.).



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A PARENTS PRAYER

Lord give me wisdom

to deal with our children as you would,

to see in each of them Your Holy image,

To develop in them a Christ-like love of men

not only a select few,

to nurture in them a divine desire to put in and not simply to

take out


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To teach them to be go givers not go-getters

O, God in training these dear ones

Whom you have entrusted to our charge-help us

To encourage rather than discourage them

To discipline with kindness not softness


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To pray always that they will be close to you,

Not only for the few years of this life but for the endless years ofthe eternity.