the third book - françois rabelais.doc

8/11/2019 The Third Book - Franois Rabelais.doc

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The Third Book - Franois Rabelais

Wikisource

Francois Rabelais to the Soul of the Deceased Queen of Navarre

Abstracted soul, ravished ith ecstasies, !one back, and no fa"iliar in the skies,

Th# for"er host, th# bod#, leavin$ %uite,

Which to obe# thee ala#s took deli$ht,--

&bse%uious, read#,--no fro" "otion free, Senseless, and as it ere in a'ath#,

Wouldst thou not issue forth for a short s'ace,

Fro" that divine, eternal, heavenl# 'lace,

To see the third 'art, in this earth# cell, &f the brave acts of $ood (anta$ruel)


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The Author*s (rolo$ue to the Third Book

The Author*s (rolo$ue+

!ood 'eo'le, "ost illustrious drinkers, and #ou, thrice 'recious $out# $entle"en, did #ou ever see Dio$enes, and c#nic

'hiloso'her) f #ou have seen hi", #ou then had #our e#es in #our head, or a" ver# "uch out of "# understandin$ and lo$ical

sense+ t is a $allant thin$ to see the clearness of ine, $old,. the sun+ *ll be /ud$ed b# the blind born so renoned in the sacred

Scri'tures, ho, havin$ at his choice to ask hatever he ould fro" hi" ho is Al"i$ht#, and hose ord in an instant iseffectuall# 'erfor"ed, asked nothin$ else but that he "i$ht see+ te", #ou are not #oun$, hich is a co"'etent %ualit# for #ou to

'hiloso'hate "ore than 'h#sicall# in ine, not in vain, and henceforards to be of the Bacchic 0ouncil1 to the end that, o'inin$

there, #ou "a# $ive #our o'inion faithfull# of the substance, colour, e2cellent odour, e"inenc#, 'ro'riet#, facult#, virtue, and

effectual di$nit# of the said blessed and desired li%uor+

f #ou have not seen hi", as a" easil# induced to believe that #ou have not, at least #ou have heard so"e talk of hi"+ For throu$h

the air, and the hole e2tent of this he"is'here of the heavens, hath his re'ort and fa"e, even until this 'resent ti"e, re"ained

ver# "e"orable and renoned+ Then all of #ou are derived fro" the (hr#$ian blood, if be not deceived+ f #ou have not so "an#crons as 3idas had, #et have #ou so"ethin$, kno not hat, of hi", hich the (ersians of old estee"ed "ore of in all their

otacusts, and hich as "ore desired b# the 4"'eror Antonine, and $ave occasion thereafter to the Basilico at Rohan to be

surna"ed !oodl# 4ars+ f #ou have not heard of hi", ill 'resentl# tell #ou a stor# to "ake #our ine relish+ Drink then,--so, to

the 'ur'ose+ 5earken no hilst $ive #ou notice, to the end that #ou "a# not, like infidels, be b# #our si"'licit# abused, that in

his ti"e he as a rare 'hiloso'her and the cheerfullest of a thousand+ f he had so"e i"'erfection, so have #ou, so have e1 forthere is nothin$, but !od, that is 'erfect+ 6et so it as, that b# Ale2ander the !reat, althou$h he had Aristotle for his instructor and

do"estic, as he held in such esti"ation, that he ished, if he had not been Ale2ander, to have been Dio$enes the Sino'ian+

When (hili', 7in$ of 3acedon, enter'rised the sie$e and ruin of 0orinth, the 0orinthians havin$ received certain intelli$ence b#

their s'ies that he ith a nu"erous ar"# in battle-rank as co"in$ a$ainst the", ere all of the", not ithout cause, "ost terribl#

afraid1 and therefore ere not ne$lective of their dut# in doin$ their best endeavours to 'ut the"selves in a fit 'osture to resist hishostile a''roach and defend their on cit#+

So"e fro" the fields brou$ht into the fortified 'laces their "ovables, bestial, corn, ine, fruit, victuals, and other necessar#

'rovision+

&thers did fortif# and ra"'ire their alls, set u' little fortresses, bastions, s%uared ravelins, di$$ed trenches, cleansed

counter"ines, fenced the"selves ith $abions, contrived 'latfor"s, e"'tied case"ates, barricaded the false bra#s, erected thecavaliers, re'aired the counterscar's, 'lastered the curtains, len$thened ravelins, sto''ed 'ara'ets, "orticed barbacans, assured the

'ortcullises, fastened the herses, sarasines%ues, and cataracts, 'laced their sentries, and doubled their 'atrol+ 4ver#one did atch

and ard, and not one as e2e"'ted fro" carr#in$ the basket+ So"e 'olished corslets, varnished backs and breasts, cleaned the

head'ieces, "ail-coats, bri$andines, salads, hel"ets, "orions, /acks, $ushets, $or$ets, ho$uines, brassars, and cuissars, corslets,

hauber$eons, shields, bucklers, tar$ets, $reaves, $auntlets, and s'urs+ &thers "ade read# bos, slin$s, crossbos, 'ellets,cata'ults, "i$rains or fire-balls, firebrands, balists, scor'ions, and other such arlike en$ines e2'u$nator# and destructive to the

5elle'olides+ The# shar'ened and 're'ared s'ears, staves, 'ikes, bron bills, halberds, lon$ hooks, lances, 8a$a#es, %uarterstaves,

eels'ears, 'artisans, troutstaves, clubs, battle-a2es, "aces, darts, dartlets, $laives, /avelins, /avelots, and truncheons+ The# set ed$es

u'on sci"itars, cutlasses, badelairs, backsords, tucks, ra'iers, ba#onets, arro-heads, da$s, da$$ers, "andousians, 'oniards,hin#ards, knives, skeans, shables, chi''in$ knives, and raillons+

4ver# "an e2ercised his ea'on, ever# "an scoured off the rust fro" his natural han$er1 nor as there a o"an a"on$st the",

thou$h never so reserved or old, ho "ade not her harness to be ell furbished1 as #ou kno the 0orinthian o"en of old erere'uted ver# coura$eous co"batants+

Dio$enes seein$ the" all so ar" at ork, and hi"self not e"'lo#ed b# the "a$istrates in an# business hatsoever, he did ver#

seriousl#, for "an# da#s to$ether, ithout s'eakin$ one ord, consider and conte"'late the countenance of his fello-citi8ens+

Then on a sudden, as if he had been roused u' and ins'ired b# a "artial s'irit, he $irded his cloak scarfise about his left ar",

tucked u' his sleeves to the elbo, trussed hi"self like a clon $atherin$ a''les, and, $ivin$ to one of his old ac%uaintance his

allet, books, and o'isto$ra'hs, aa# ent he out of ton toards a little hill or 'ro"ontor# of 0orinth called the. 0ranie1 andthere on the strand, a 'rett# level 'lace, did he roll his /oll# tub, hich served hi" for a house to shelter hi" fro" the in/uries of

the eather9 there, sa#, in a $reat vehe"enc# of s'irit, did he turn it, veer it, heel it, hirl it, frisk it, /u"ble it, shuffle it, huddle

it, tu"ble it, hurr# it, /olt it, /ustle it, overthro it, evert it, invert it, subvert it, overturn it, beat it, thack it, bu"' it, batter it,

knock it, thrust it, 'ush it, /erk it, shock it, shake it, toss it, thro it, overthro it, u'side don, to's#-turv#, arsiturv#, tread it,


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tra"'le it, sta"' it, ta' it, tin$ it, rin$ it, tin$le it, tol it, sound it, resound it, sto' it, shut it, unbun$ it, close it, unsto''le it+ And

then a$ain in a "i$ht# bustle he bandied it, slubbered it, hacked it, hittled it, a#ed it, darted it, hurled it, sta$$ered it, reeled it,

sin$ed it, bran$led it, tottered it, lifted it, heaved it, transfor"ed it, transfi$ured it, trans'osed it, trans'laced it, reared it, raised it,

hoised it, ashed it, di$hted it, cleansed it, rinsed it, nailed it, settled it, fastened it, shackled it, fettered it, levelled it, blocked it,tu$$ed it, teed it, carried it, bedashed it, bera#ed it, 'arched it, "ounted it, broached it, nicked it, notched it, bes'attered it,

decked it, adorned it, tri""ed it, $arnished it, $au$ed it, furnished it, bored it, 'ierced it, tra''ed it, ru"bled it, slid it don the

hill, and 'reci'itated it fro" the ver# hei$ht of the 0ranie1 then fro" the foot to the to' like another Sis#'hus ith his stone. bore

it u' a$ain, and ever# a# so ban$ed it and belaboured it that it as ten thousand to one he had not struck the botto" of it out+

Which hen one of his friends had seen, and asked hi" h# he did so toil his bod#, 'er'le2 his s'irit, and tor"ent his tub, the

'hiloso'her*s anser as that, not bein$ e"'lo#ed in an# other char$e b# the Re'ublic, he thou$ht it e2'edient to thunder and

stor" it so te"'estuousl# u'on his tub, that a"on$st a 'eo'le so ferventl# bus# and earnest at ork he alone "i$ht not see" aloiterin$ slu$ and la8# fello+ To the sa"e 'ur'ose "a# sa# of "#self,

Thou$h be rid fro" fear,

a" not void of care+

For, 'erceivin$ no account to be "ade of "e toards the dischar$e of a trust of an# $reat concern"ent, and considerin$ that

throu$h all the 'arts of this "ost noble kin$do" of France, both on this and on the other side of the "ountains, ever#one is "ost

dili$entl# e2ercised and busied, so"e in the fortif#in$ of their on native countr# for its defence, others in the re'ulsin$ of their

ene"ies b# an offensive ar1 and all this ith a 'olic# so e2cellent and such ad"irable order, so "anifestl# 'rofitable for thefuture, hereb# France shall have its frontiers "ost "a$nificall# enlar$ed, and the French assured of a lon$ and ell-$rounded

'eace, that ver# little ithholds "e fro" the o'inion of $ood 5eraclitus, hich affir"eth ar to be the father of all $ood thin$s1and therefore do believe that ar is in :atin called bellu", not b# anti'hrasis, as so"e 'atchers of old rust# :atin ould have us

to think, because in ar there is little beaut# to be seen, but absolutel# and si"'l#1 for that in ar a''eareth all that is $ood and

$raceful, and that b# the ars is 'ur$ed out all "anner of ickedness and defor"it#+ For 'roof hereof the ise and 'acific

Solo"on could no better re'resent the uns'eakable 'erfection of the divine isdo", than b# co"'arin$ it to the due dis'osure andrankin$ of an ar"# in battle arra#, ell 'rovided and ordered+

Therefore, b# reason of "# eakness and inabilit#, bein$ re'uted b# "# co"'atriots unfit for the offensive 'art of arfare1 and on

the other side, bein$ no a# e"'lo#ed in "atter of the defensive, althou$h it had been but to carr# burthens, fill ditches, or breakclods, either hereof had been to "e indifferent, held it not a little dis$raceful to be onl# an idle s'ectator of so "an# valorous,

elo%uent, and arlike 'ersons, ho in the vie and si$ht of all 4uro'e act this notable interlude or tra$i-co"ed#, and not "ake

so"e effort toards the 'erfor"ance of this, nothin$ at all re"ains for "e to be done *And not e2ert "#self, and contribute theretothis nothin$, "# all, hich re"ained for "e to do+*--&8ell+.+ n "# o'inion, little honour is due to such as are "ere lookers-on,liberal of their e#es, and of their crons, and hide their silver1 scratchin$ their head ith one fin$er like $ru"blin$ 'u''ies, $a'in$

at the flies like tithe calves1 cla''in$ don their ears like Arcadian asses at the "elod# of "usicians, ho ith their ver#

countenances in the de'th of silence e2'ress their consent to the 'roso'o'oeia+ 5avin$ "ade this choice and election, it see"ed to

"e that "# e2ercise therein ould be neither un'rofitable nor troubleso"e to an#, hilst should thus set a-$oin$ "# Dio$enicaltub, hich is all that is left "e safe fro" the shi'reck of "# for"er "isfortunes+

At this din$le dan$le a$$in$ of "# tub, hat ould #ou have "e to do) B# the ;ir$in that tucks u' her sleeve, kno not as #et+

Sta# a little, till suck u' a drau$ht of this bottle1 it is "# true and onl# 5elicon1 it is "# 0aballine fountain1 it is "# soleenthusias"+ Drinkin$ thus, "editate, discourse, resolve, and conclude+ After that the e'ilo$ue is "ade, lau$h, rite,

co"'ose, and drink a$ain+ 4nnius drinkin$ rote, and ritin$ drank+ Aesch#lus, if (lutarch in his S#"'osiacs "erit an# faith,

drank co"'osin$, and drinkin$ co"'osed+ 5o"er never rote fastin$, and 0ato never rote till after he had drunk+ These

'assa$es have brou$ht before #ou to the end #ou "a# not sa# that lived ithout the e2a"'le of "en ell 'raised and better'ri8ed+ t is $ood and fresh enou$h, even as if #ou ould sa# it is enterin$ u'on the second de$ree+ !od, the $ood !od Sabaoth,

that is to sa#, the !od of ar"ies, be 'raised for it eternall#< f #ou after the sa"e "anner ould take one $reat drau$ht, or to little

ones, hilst #ou have #our $on about #ou, trul# find no kind of inconvenienc# in it, 'rovided #ou send u' to !od for all so"e

s"all scantlin$ of thanks+

Since then "# luck or destin# is such as #ou have heard--for it is not for ever#bod# to $o to 0orinth-- a" full# resolved to be so

little idle and un'rofitable, that ill set "#self to serve the one and the other sort of 'eo'le+ A"on$st the di$$ers, 'ioneers, and

ra"'ire-builders, ill do as did Ne'tune and A'ollo at Tro# under :ao"edon, or as did Renault of 3ontauban in his latter da#s9 ill serve the "asons, *ll set on the 'ot to boil for the brickla#ers1 and, hilst the "inced "eat is "akin$ read# at the sound of "#

s"all 'i'e, *ll "easure the "u88le of the "usin$ dotards+ Thus did A"'hion ith the "elod# of his har' found, build, and finish

the $reat and renoned cit# of Thebes+


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For the use of the arriors a" about to broach of ne "# barrel to $ive the" a taste hich b# to for"er volu"es of "ine, if b#

the deceitfulness and falsehood of 'rinters the# had not been /u"bled, "arred, and s'oiled, #ou ould have ver# ell relished.,

and dra unto the", of the $roth of our on tri''er# 'asti"es, a $allant third 'art of a $allon, and conse%uentl# a /oll# cheerful

%uart of (anta$ruelic sentences, hich #ou "a# lafull# call, if #ou 'lease, Dio$enical9 and shall have "e, seein$ cannot be theirfello-soldier, for their faithful butler, refreshin$ and cheerin$, accordin$ to "# little 'oer, their return fro" the alar"s of the

ene"#1 as also for an indefati$able e2toller of their "artial e2'loits and $lorious achieve"ents+ shall not fail therein, 'ar

la'athiu" acutu" de dieu1 if 3ars fail not in :ent, hich the cunnin$ lecher, arrant #ou, ill be loth to do+

re"e"ber nevertheless to have read, that (tole"#, the son of :a$us, one da#, a"on$st the "an# s'oils and booties hich b# his

victories he had ac%uired, 'resentin$ to the 4$#'tians, in the o'en vie of the 'eo'le, a Bactrian ca"el all black, and a 'art#-

coloured slave, in such sort as that the one half of his bod# as black and the other hite, not in 'artition of breadth b# the

dia'hra$"a, as as that o"an consecrated to the ndian ;enus ho" the T#anean 'hiloso'her did see beteen the river5#das'es and 3ount 0aucasus, but in a 'er'endicular di"ension of altitude1 hich ere thin$s never before that seen in 4$#'t+

5e e2'ected b# the sho of these novelties to in the love of the 'eo'le+ But hat ha''ened thereu'on) At the 'roduction of the

ca"el the# ere all affri$hted, and offended at the si$ht of the 'art#-coloured "an--so"e scoffed at hi" as a detestable "onster

brou$ht forth b# the error of nature1 in a ord, of the ho'e hich he had to 'lease these 4$#'tians, and b# such "eans to increasethe affection hich the# naturall# bore hi", he as alto$ether frustrate and disa''ointed1 understandin$ full# b# their de'ort"ents

that the# took "ore 'leasure and deli$ht in thin$s that ere 'ro'er, handso"e, and 'erfect, than in "issha'en, "onstrous, and

ridiculous creatures+ Since hich ti"e he had both the slave and the ca"el in such dislike, that ver# shortl# thereafter, either

throu$h ne$li$ence, or for ant of ordinar# sustenance, the# did e2chan$e their life ith death+

This e2a"'le 'utteth "e in a sus'ense beteen ho'e and fear, "isdoubtin$ that, for the content"ent hich ai" at, ill but rea'

hat shall be "ost distasteful to "e9 "# cake ill be dou$h, and for "# ;enus shall have but so"e defor"ed 'u''#9 instead ofservin$ the", shall but ve2 the", and offend the" ho" 'ur'ose to e2hilarate1 rese"blin$ in this dubious adventure 4uclion*s

cook, so renoned b# (lautus in his (ot, and b# Ausonius in his !ri'hon, and b# divers others1 hich cook, for havin$ b# his

scra'in$ discovered a treasure, had his hide ell curried+ (ut the case $et no an$er b# it, thou$h for"erl# such thin$s fell out, and

the like "a# occur a$ain+ 6et, b# 5ercules< it ill not+ So 'erceive in the" all one and the sa"e s'ecifical for", and the likeindividual 'ro'erties, hich our ancestors called (anta$ruelis"1 b# virtue hereof the# ill bear ith an#thin$ that floeth fro" a

$ood, free, and lo#al heart+ have seen the" ordinaril# take $oodill in 'art of 'a#"ent, and re"ain satisfied thereith hen one

as not able to do better+ 5avin$ des'atched this 'oint, return to "# barrel+

=', "# lads, to this ine, s'are it not< Drink, bo#s, and trol it off at full bols< f #ou do not think it $ood, let it alone+ a" not

like those officious and i"'ortunate sots, ho b# force, outra$e, and violence, constrain an eas# $ood-natured fello to hiffle,

%uaff, carouse, and hat is orse+ All honest ti''lers, all honest $out# "en, all such as are a-dr#, co"in$ to this little barrel of"ine, need not drink thereof if it 'lease the" not1 but if the# have a "ind to it, and that the ine 'rove a$reeable to the tastes oftheir orshi'ful orshi's, let the" drink, frankl#, freel#, and boldl#, ithout 'a#in$ an#thin$, and elco"e+ This is "# decree,

"# statute and ordinance+

And let none fear there shall be an# ant of ine, as at the "arria$e of 0ana in !alilee1 for ho "uch soever #ou shall dra forthat the faucet, so "uch shall tun in at the bun$+ Thus shall the barrel re"ain ine2haustible1 it hath a livel# s'rin$ and 'er'etual

current+ Such as the bevera$e contained ithin the cu' of Tantalus, hich as fi$urativel# re'resented a"on$st the Brach"an

sa$es+ Such as in beria the "ountain of salt so hi$hl# ritten of b# 0ato+ Such as the branch of $old consecrated to the

subterranean $oddess, hich ;ir$il treats of so subli"el#+ t is a true cornuco'ia of "erri"ent and railler#+ f at an# ti"e it see" to#ou to be e"'tied to the ver# lees, #et shall it not for all that be dran holl# dr#+ !ood ho'e re"ains there at the botto", as in

(andora*s bottle1 and not des'air, as in the 'uncheon of the Danaids+ Re"ark ell hat have said, and hat "anner of 'eo'le

the# be ho" do invite1 for, to the end that none be deceived, , in i"itation of :ucilius, ho did 'rotest that he rote onl# to his

on Tarentines and 0onsentines, have not 'ierced this vessel for an# else but #ou honest "en, ho are drinkers of the first edition,and $out# blades of the hi$hest de$ree+ The $reat doro'ha$es, bribe-"on$ers, have on their hands occu'ation enou$h, and enou$h

on the hooks for their venison+ There "a# the# follo their 're#1 here is no $arba$e for the"+ 6ou 'ettifo$$ers, $arblers, and

"asters of chicaner#, s'eak not to "e, beseech #ou, in the na"e of, and for the reverence #ou bear to the four hi's that

en$endered #ou and to the %uickenin$ 'e$ hich at that ti"e con/oined the"+ As for h#'ocrites, "uch less1 althou$h the# ere allof the" unsound in bod#, 'ockified, scurv#, furnished ith un%uenchable thirst and insatiable eatin$+ And herefore). Because

indeed the# are not of $ood but of evil, and of that evil fro" hich e dail# 'ra# to !od to deliver us+ And albeit e see the"

so"eti"es counterfeit devotion, #et never did old a'e "ake 'rett# "o''et+ 5ence, "astiffs1 do$s in a doublet, $et #ou behind1

aloof, villains, out of "# sunshine1 curs, to the devil< Do #ou /o$ hither, a$$in$ #our tails, to 'ant at "# ine, and be'iss "#barrel) :ook, here is the cud$el hich Dio$enes, in his last ill, ordained to be set b# hi" after his death, for beatin$ aa#,

crushin$ the reins, and breakin$ the backs of these bustuar# hob$oblins and 0erberian hellhounds+ (ack #ou hence, therefore, #ou

h#'ocrites, to #our shee'-do$s1 $et #ou $one, #ou disse"blers, to the devil< 5a#< What, are #ou there #et) renounce "# 'art of


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(a'i"anie, if snatch #ou, !rr, !rrr, !rrrrrr+ Avaunt, avaunt< Will #ou not be $one) 3a# #ou never shit till #ou be soundl# lashed

ith stirru' leather, never 'iss but b# the stra'ado, nor be otherise ar"ed than b# the bastinado+


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5o (anta$ruel trans'orted a colon# of =to'ians into Di'sod#

(anta$ruel, havin$ holl# subdued the land of Di'sod#, trans'orted thereunto a colon# of =to'ians, to the nu"ber of

>,?@,C,EG "en, besides the o"en and little children, artificers of all trades, and 'rofessors of all sciences, to 'eo'le,cultivate, and i"'rove that countr#, hich otherise as ill inhabited, and in the $reatest 'art thereof but a "ere desert and

ilderness1 and did trans'ort the" not. so "uch for the e2cessive "ultitude of "en and o"en, hich ere in =to'ia "ulti'lied,

for nu"ber, like $rassho''ers u'on the face of the land+ 6ou understand ell enou$h, nor is it needful further to e2'lain it to #ou,

that the =to'ian "en had so rank and fruitful $enitories, and that the =to'ian o"en carried "atri2es so a"'le, so $luttonous, sotenaciousl# retentive, and so architectonicall# cellulated, that at the end of ever# ninth "onth seven children at the least, hat "ale

hat fe"ale, ere brou$ht forth b# ever# "arried o"an, in i"itation of the 'eo'le of srael in 4$#'t, if Anthon# Nicholas. de

:#ra be to be trusted+ Nor #et as this trans'lantation "ade so "uch for the fertilit# of the soil, the holeso"eness of the air, or

co""odit# of the countr# of Di'sod#, as to retain that rebellious 'eo'le ithin the bounds of their dut# and obedience, b# this netrans'ort of his ancient and "ost faithful sub/ects, ho, fro" all ti"e out of "ind, never kne, acknoled$ed, oned, or served

an# other soverei$n lord but hi"1 and ho likeise, fro" the ver# instant of their birth, as soon as the# ere entered into this

orld, had, ith the "ilk of their "others and nurses, sucked in the seetness, hu"anit#, and "ildness of his $overn"ent, to

hich the# ere all of the" so nourished and habituated, that there as nothin$ surer than that the# ould sooner abandon theirlives than serve fro" this sin$ular and 'ri"itive obedience naturall# due to their 'rince, hithersoever the# should be dis'ersed

or re"oved+

And not onl# should the#, and their children successivel# descendin$ fro" their blood, be such, but also ould kee' and "aintain

in this sa"e fealt# and obse%uious observance all the nations latel# anne2ed to his e"'ire1 hich so trul# ca"e to 'ass that thereinhe as not disa''ointed of his intent+ For if the =to'ians ere before their trans'lantation thither dutiful and faithful sub/ects, the

Di'sodes, after so"e fe da#s conversin$ ith the", ere ever# hit as, if not "ore, lo#al than the#1 and that b# virtue of knonot hat natural fervenc# incident to all hu"an creatures at the be$innin$ of an# labour herein the# take deli$ht9 sole"nl#

attestin$ the heavens and su're"e intelli$ences of their bein$ onl# sorr# that no sooner unto their knoled$e had arrived the $reat

renon of the $ood (anta$ruel+

Re"ark therefore here, honest drinkers, that the "anner of 'reservin$ and retainin$ countries nel# con%uered in obedience is not,

as hath been the erroneous o'inion of so"e t#rannical s'irits to their on detri"ent and dishonour, to 'illa$e, 'lunder, force, s'oil,

trouble, o''ress, ve2, dis%uiet, ruin and destro# the 'eo'le, rulin$, $overnin$ and kee'in$ the" in ae ith rods of iron1 and, in a

ord, eatin$ and devourin$ the", after the fashion that 5o"er calls an un/ust and icked kin$, De"oboron, that is to sa#, adevourer of his 'eo'le+

ill not brin$ #ou to this 'ur'ose the testi"on# of ancient riters+ t shall suffice to 'ut #ou in "ind of hat #our fathers haveseen thereof, and #ourselves too, if #ou be not ver# babes+ Neborn, the# "ust be $iven suck to, rocked in a cradle, and dandled+Trees nel# 'lanted "ust be su''orted, under'ro''ed, stren$thened and defended a$ainst all te"'ests, "ischiefs, in/uries, and

cala"ities+ And one latel# saved fro" a lon$ and dan$erous sickness, and ne u'on his recover#, "ust be forborn, s'ared, and

cherished, in such sort that the# "a# harbour in their on breasts this o'inion, that there is not in the orld a kin$ or a 'rince ho

does not desire feer ene"ies and "ore friends+ Thus &siris, the $reat kin$ of the 4$#'tians, con%uered al"ost the hole earth,not so "uch b# force of ar"s as b# easin$ the 'eo'le of their troubles, teachin$ the" ho to live ell, and honestl# $ivin$ the"

$ood las, and usin$ the" ith all 'ossible affabilit#, courtes#, $entleness, and liberalit#+ Therefore as he b# all "en deservedl#

entitled the !reat 7in$ 4uer$etes, that is to sa#, Benefactor, hich st#le he obtained b# virtue of the co""and of Hu'iter to one.

(a"#la+

And in effect, 5esiod, in his 5ierarch#, 'laced the $ood de"ons call the" an$els if #ou ill, or $eniuses,. as intercessors and

"ediators beti2t the $ods and "en, the# bein$ of a de$ree inferior to the $ods, but su'erior to "en+ And for that throu$h their

hands the riches and benefits e $et fro" heaven are dealt to us, and that the# are continuall# doin$ us $ood and still 'rotectin$ usfro" evil, he saith that the# e2ercise the offices of kin$s1 because to do ala#s $ood, and never ill, is an act "ost sin$ularl# ro#al+

Hust such another as the e"'eror of the universe, Ale2ander the 3acedonian+ After this "anner as 5ercules soverei$n 'ossessor

of the hole continent, relievin$ "en fro" "onstrous o''ressions, e2actions, and t#rannies1 $overnin$ the" ith discretion,"aintainin$ the" in e%uit# and /ustice, instructin$ the" ith seasonable 'olicies and holeso"e las, convenient for and suitable

to the soil, cli"ate, and dis'osition of the countr#, su''l#in$ hat as antin$, abatin$ hat as su'erfluous, and 'ardonin$ all

that as 'ast, ith a se"'iternal for$etfulness of all 'recedin$ offences, as as the a"nest# of the Athenians, hen b# the

'roess, valour, and industr# of Thras#bulus the t#rants ere e2ter"inated1 afterards at Ro"e b# 0icero e2'osed, and reneedunder the 4"'eror Aurelian+ These are the 'hiltres, allure"ents, i#n$es, invei$le"ents, baits, and entice"ents of love, b# the

"eans hereof that "a# be 'eaceabl# revived hich as 'ainfull# ac%uired+ Nor can a con%ueror rei$n "ore ha''il#, hether he

be a "onarch, e"'eror, kin$, 'rince, or 'hiloso'her, than b# "akin$ his /ustice to second his valour+ 5is valour shos itself in


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victor# and con%uest1 his /ustice ill a''ear in the $oodill and affection of the 'eo'le, hen he "aketh las, 'ublisheth

ordinances, establisheth reli$ion, and doth hat is ri$ht to ever#one, as the noble 'oet ;ir$il rites of &ctavian Au$ustus9

;ictor%ue volentes (er 'o'ulos dat /ura+

Therefore is it that 5o"er in his liads calleth a $ood 'rince and $reat kin$ 7os"etora laon, that is, the orna"ent of the 'eo'le+

Such as the consideration of Nu"a (o"'ilius, the second kin$ of the Ro"ans, a /ust 'olitician and ise 'hiloso'her, hen he

ordained that to $od Ter"inus, on the da# of his festival called Ter"inales, nothin$ should be sacrificed that had died1 teachin$ us

thereb# that the bounds, li"its, and frontiers of kin$do"s should be $uarded, and 'reserved in 'eace, a"it#, and "eekness, ithout

'ollutin$ our hands ith blood and robber#+ Who doth otherise, shall not onl# lose hat he hath $ained, but also be loaded iththis scandal and re'roach, that he is an un/ust and icked 'urchaser, and his ac%uests 'erish ith hi"1 Hu2ta illud, "ale 'arta, "ale

dilabuntur+ And althou$h durin$ his hole lifeti"e he should have 'eaceable 'ossession thereof, #et if hat hath been so ac%uired

"oulder aa# in the hands of his heirs, the sa"e o''robr#, scandal, and i"'utation ill be char$ed u'on the defunct, and his

"e"or# re"ain accursed for his un/ust and unarrantable con%uest1 Hu2ta illud, de "ale %uaesitis vi2 $audet tertius haeres+

Re"ark, likeise, $entle"en, #ou $out# feoffees, in this "ain 'oint orth# of #our observation, ho b# these "eans (anta$ruel of

one an$el "ade to, hich as a contin$enc# o''osite to the counsel of 0harle"a$ne, ho "ade to devils of one hen he

trans'lanted the Sa2ons into Flanders and the Fle"in$s into Sa2on#+ For, not bein$ able to kee' in such sub/ection the Sa2ons,

hose do"inion he had /oined to the e"'ire, but that ever and anon the# ould break forth into o'en rebellion if he shouldcasuall# be dran into S'ain or other re"ote kin$do"s, he caused the" to be brou$ht unto his on countr# of Flanders, the

inhabitants hereof did naturall# obe# hi", and trans'orted the 5ainaults and Fle"in$s, his ancient lovin$ sub/ects, into Sa2on#,not "istrustin$ their lo#alt# no that the# ere trans'lanted into a stran$e land+ But it ha''ened that the Sa2ons 'ersisted in their

rebellion and 'ri"itive obstinac#, and the Fle"in$s dellin$ in Sa2on# did i"bibe the stubborn "anners and conditions of the

Sa2ons+


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5o (anur$e as "ade :aird of Sal"i$ondin in Di'sod#, and did aste his revenue before it ca"e in

Whilst (anta$ruel as $ivin$ order for the $overn"ent of all Di'sod#, he assi$ned to (anur$e the lairdshi' of Sal"i$ondin, hich

as #earl# orth ,@?>,G,@?> reals of certain rent, besides the uncertain revenue of the locusts and 'eriinkles, a"ountin$, one#ear ith another, to the value of C,@?, or E,C,@> French crons of Berr#+ So"eti"es it did a"ount to ,EG,C,E

sera'hs, hen it as a $ood #ear, and that locusts and 'eriinkles ere in re%uest1 but that as not ever# #ear+

No his orshi', the ne laird, husbanded this his estate so 'rovidentl# ell and 'rudentl#, that in less than fourteen da#s heasted and dila'idated all the certain and uncertain revenue of his lairdshi' for three hole #ears+ 6et did not he 'ro'erl#

dila'idate it, as #ou "i$ht sa#, in foundin$ of "onasteries, buildin$ of churches, erectin$ of colle$es, and settin$ u' of hos'itals, or

castin$ his bacon-flitches to the do$s1 but s'ent it in a thousand little ban%uets and /oll# collations, kee'in$ o'en house for all

co"ers and $oers1 #ea, to all $ood fellos, #oun$ $irls, and 'rett# enches1 fellin$ ti"ber, burnin$ $reat lo$s for the sale of theashes, borroin$ "one# beforehand, bu#in$ dear, sellin$ chea', and eatin$ his corn, as it ere, hilst it as but $rass+

(anta$ruel, bein$ advertised of this his lavishness, as in $ood sooth no a# offended at the "atter, an$r# nor sorr#1 for once

told #ou, and a$ain tell it #ou, that he as the best, little, $reat $ood"an that ever $irded a sord to his side+ 5e took all thin$s in$ood 'art, and inter'reted ever# action to the best sense+ 5e never ve2ed nor dis%uieted hi"self ith the least 'retence of dislike to

an#thin$, because he kne that he "ust have "ost $rossl# abandoned the divine "ansion of reason if he had 'er"itted his "ind to

be never so little $rieved, afflicted, or altered at an# occasion hatsoever+ For all the $oods that the heaven covereth, and that the

earth containeth, in all their di"ensions of hei$ht, de'th, breadth, and len$th, are not of so "uch orth as that e should for the"

disturb or disorder our affections, trouble or 'er'le2 our senses or s'irits+

5e dre onl# (anur$e aside, and then, "akin$ to hi" a seet re"onstrance and "ild ad"onition, ver# $entl# re'resented beforehi" in stron$ ar$u"ents, that, if he should continue in such an unthrift# course of livin$, and not beco"e a better "esna$ier, it

ould 'rove alto$ether i"'ossible for hi", or at least hu$el# difficult, at an# ti"e to "ake hi" rich+ Rich< ansered (anur$e1 have

#ou fi2ed #our thou$hts there) 5ave #ou undertaken the task to enrich "e in this orld) Set #our "ind to live "erril#, in the na"e

of !od and $ood folks1 let no other cark nor care be harboured ithin the sacrosanctified do"icile of #our celestial brain+ 3a# thecal"ness and tran%uillit# thereof be never inco""odated ith, or overshadoed b# an# fronin$ clouds of sullen i"a$inations

and dis'leasin$ anno#ance< For if #ou live /o#ful, "err#, /ocund, and $lad, cannot be but rich enou$h+ 4ver#bod# cries u' thrift,

thrift, and $ood husbandr#+ But "an# s'eak of Robin 5ood that never shot in his bo, and talk of that virtue of "esna$er# ho

kno not hat belon$s to it+ t is b# "e that the# "ust be advised+ Fro" "e, therefore, take this advertise"ent and infor"ation,that hat is i"'uted to "e for a vice hath been done in i"itation of the universit# and 'arlia"ent of (aris, 'laces in hich is to be

found the true s'rin$ and source of the livel# idea of (antheolo$# and all "anner of /ustice+ :et hi" be counted a heretic that

doubteth thereof, and doth not fir"l# believe it+ 6et the# in one da# eat u' their bisho', or the revenue of the bisho'ric--is it not allone)--for a hole #ear, #ea, so"eti"es for to+ This is done on the da# he "akes his entr#, and is installed+ Nor is there an# 'lacefor an e2cuse1 for he cannot avoid it, unless he ould be hooted at and stoned for his 'arsi"on#+

t hath been also estee"ed an act floin$ fro" the habit of the four cardinal virtues+ &f 'rudence in borroin$ "one# beforehand1for none knos hat "a# fall out+ Who is able to tell if the orld shall last #et three #ears) But althou$h it should continue lon$er,

is there an# "an so foolish as to have the confidence to 'ro"ise hi"self three #ears)

What fool so confident to sa#, That he shall live one other da#)

&f co""utative /ustice, in bu#in$ dear, sa#, u'on trust, and sellin$ $oods chea', that is, for read# "one#+ What sa#s 0ato in his

Book of 5usbandr# to this 'ur'ose) The father of a fa"il#, sa#s he, "ust be a 'er'etual seller1 b# hich "eans it is i"'ossible butthat at last he shall beco"e rich, if he have of vendible are enou$h still read# for sale+

&f distributive /ustice it doth 'artake, in $ivin$ entertain"ent to $ood --re"ark, $ood--and $entle fellos, ho" fortune had

shi'recked, like =l#sses, u'on the rock of a hun$r# sto"ach ithout 'rovision of sustenance1 and likeise to the $ood--re"ark,the $ood--and #oun$ enches+ For, accordin$ to the sentence of 5i''ocrates, 6outh is i"'atient of hun$er, chiefl# if it be

vi$orous, livel#, frolic, brisk, stirrin$, and bouncin$+ Which anton lasses illin$l# and heartil# devote the"selves to the 'leasure

of honest "en1 and are in so far both (latonic and 0iceronian, that the# do acknoled$e their bein$ born into this orld not to be

for the"selves alone, but that in their 'ro'er 'ersons their ac%uaintance "a# clai" one share, and their friends another+

The virtue of fortitude a''ears therein b# the cuttin$ don and overthroin$ of the $reat trees, like a second 3ilo "akin$ havoc

of the dark forest, hich did serve onl# to furnish dens, caves, and shelter to olves, ild boars, and fo2es, and afford rece'tacles,

ithdrain$ corners, and refu$es to robbers, thieves, and "urderers, lurkin$ holes and skulkin$ 'laces for cutthroat assassinators,


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secret obscure sho's for coiners of false "one#, and safe retreats for heretics, la#in$ the" even and level ith the 'lain cha"'ai$n

fields and 'leasant heath# $round, at the sound of the hautbo#s and ba$'i'es 'la#in$ reeks ith the hi$h and statel# ti"ber, and

're'arin$ seats and benches for the eve of the dreadful da# of /ud$"ent+

$ave thereb# 'roof of "# te"'erance in eatin$ "# corn hilst it as but $rass, like a her"it feedin$ u'on salads and roots, that,

so affranchisin$ "#self fro" the #oke of sensual a''etites to the utter disclai"in$ of their soverei$nt#, "i$ht the better reserve

so"ehat in store for the relief of the la"e, blind, cri''led, "ai"ed, need#, 'oor, and antin$ retches+

n takin$ this course save the e2'ense of the eed-$rubbers, ho $ain "one#,--of the rea'ers in harvest-ti"e, ho drink lustil#,

and ithout ater,--of $leaners, ho ill e2'ect their cakes and bannocks,--of threshers, ho leave no $arlic, scallions, leeks, nor

onions in our $ardens, b# the authorit# of Thestilis in ;ir$il,--and of the "illers, ho are $enerall# thieves,--and of the bakers, ho

are little better+ s this s"all savin$ or fru$alit#) Besides the "ischief and da"a$e of the field-"ice, the deca# of barns, and thedestruction usuall# "ade b# easels and other ver"in+

&f corn in the blade #ou "a# "ake $ood $reen sauce of a li$ht concoction and eas# di$estion, hich recreates the brain and

e2hilarates the ani"al s'irits, re/oiceth the si$ht, o'eneth the a''etite, deli$hteth the taste, co"forteth the heart, tickleth the ton$ue,cheereth the countenance, strikin$ a fresh and livel# colour, stren$thenin$ the "uscles, te"'ers the blood, disburdens the "idriff,

refresheth the liver, disobstructs the s'leen, easeth the kidne#s, su''leth the reins, %uickens the /oints of the back, cleanseth the

urine-conduits, dilates the s'er"atic vessels, shortens the cre"asters, 'ur$eth the bladder, 'uffeth u' the $enitories, correcteth the

're'uce, hardens the nut, and rectifies the "e"ber+ t ill "ake #ou have a current bell# to trot, fart, dun$, 'iss, snee8e, cou$h,

s'it, belch, s'e, #an, snuff, blo, breathe, snort, seat, and set taut #our Robin, ith a thousand other rare advanta$es+ understand #ou ver# ell, sa#s (anta$ruel1 #ou ould thereb# infer that those of a "ean s'irit and shallo ca'acit# have not the

skill to s'end "uch in a short ti"e+ 6ou are not the first in hose conceit that heres# hath entered+ Nero "aintained it, and aboveall "ortals ad"ired "ost his uncle 0aius 0ali$ula, for havin$ in a fe da#s, b# a "ost onderfull# 're$nant invention, totall#

s'ent all the $oods and 'atri"on# hich Tiberius had left hi"+

But, instead of observin$ the su"'tuous su''er-curbin$ las of the Ro"ans --to it, the &rchia, the Fannia, the Didia, the :icinia,the 0ornelia, the :e'idiana, the Antia, and of the 0orinthians--b# the hich the# ere inhibited, under 'ain of $reat 'unish"ent,

not to s'end "ore in one #ear than their annual revenue did a"ount to, #ou have offered u' the oblation of (rotervia, hich as

ith the Ro"ans such a sacrifice as the 'aschal la"b as a"on$st the Hes, herein all that as eatable as to be eaten, and the

re"ainder to be thron into the fire, ithout reservin$ an#thin$ for the ne2t da#+ "a# ver# /ustl# sa# of #ou, as 0ato did ofAlbidius, ho after that he had b# a "ost e2trava$ant e2'ense asted all the "eans and 'ossessions he had to one onl# house, he

fairl# set it on fire, that he "i$ht the better sa#, 0onsu""atu" est+ 4ven /ust as since his ti"e St+ Tho"as A%uinas did, hen he

had eaten u' the hole la"'re#, althou$h there as no necessit# in it+


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5o (anur$e 'raiseth the debtors and borroers

But, %uoth (anta$ruel, hen ill #ou be out of debt) At the ne2t ensuin$ ter" of the !reek kalends, ansered (anur$e, hen all

the orld shall be content, and that it be #our fate to beco"e #our on heir+ The :ord forbid that should be out of debt, as if,indeed, could not be trusted+ Who leaves not so"e leaven over ni$ht, ill hardl# have 'aste the ne2t "ornin$+

Be still indebted to so"ebod# or other, that there "a# be so"ebod# ala#s to 'ra# for #ou, that the $iver of all $ood thin$s "a#

$rant unto #ou a blessed, lon$, and 'ros'erous life1 fearin$, if fortune should deal crossl# ith #ou, that it "i$ht be his chance toco"e short of bein$ 'aid b# #ou, he ill ala#s s'eak $ood of #ou in ever# co"'an#, ever and anon 'urchase ne creditors unto

#ou1 to the end, that throu$h their "eans #ou "a# "ake a shift b# borroin$ fro" (eter to 'a# (aul, and ith other folk*s earth fill

u' his ditch+ When of old, in the re$ion of the !auls, b# the institution of the Druids, the servants, slaves, and bond"en ere burnt

%uick at the funerals and obse%uies of their lords and "asters, had not the# fear enou$h, think #ou, that their lords and "astersshould die) For, 'erforce, the# ere to die ith the" for co"'an#+ Did not the# incessantl# send u' their su''lications to their

$reat $od 3ercur#, as likeise unto Dis, the father of ealth, to len$then out their da#s, and to 'reserve the" lon$ in health) Were

not the# ver# careful to entertain the" ell, 'unctuall# to look unto the", and to attend the" faithfull# and circu"s'ectl#) For b#

those "eans ere the# to live to$ether at least until the hour of death+ Believe "e, #our creditors ith a "ore fervent devotion illbeseech Al"i$ht# !od to 'rolon$ #our life, the# bein$ of nothin$ "ore afraid than that #ou should die1 for that the# are "ore

concerned for the sleeve than the ar", and love silver better than their on lives+ As it evidentl# a''eareth b# the usurers of

:anderousse, ho not lon$ since han$ed the"selves because the 'rice of the corn and ines as fallen b# the return of a $racious

season+ To this (anta$ruel anserin$ nothin$, (anur$e ent on in his discourse, sa#in$, Trul# and in $ood sooth, sir, hen

'onder "# destin# ari$ht, and think ell u'on it, #ou 'ut "e shredl# to "# 'lun$es, and have "e at a ba# in tittin$ "e ith there'roach of "# debts and creditors+ And #et did , in this onl# res'ect and consideration of bein$ a debtor, estee" "#self

orshi'ful, reverend, and for"idable+ For a$ainst the o'inion of "ost 'hiloso'hers, that of nothin$ ariseth nothin$, #et, ithouthavin$ botto"ed on so "uch as that hich is called the First 3atter, did out of nothin$ beco"e such a. "aker and creator, that

have created--hat)--a $a# nu"ber of fair and /oll# creditors+ Na#, creditors, ill "aintain it, even to the ver# fire itself

e2clusivel#, are fair and $oodl# creatures+ Who lendeth nothin$ is an u$l# and icked creature, and an accursed i"' of the infernal

&ld Nick+ And there is "ade--hat) Debts+ A thin$ "ost 'recious and daint#, of $reat use and anti%uit#+ Debts, sa#, sur"ountin$the nu"ber of s#llables hich "a# result fro" the co"binations of all the consonants, ith each of the voels heretofore

'ro/ected, reckoned, and calculated b# the noble Ienocrates+ To /ud$e of the 'erfection of debtors b# the nu"erosit# of their

creditors is the readiest a# for enterin$ into the "#steries of 'ractical arith"etic+

6ou can hardl# i"a$ine ho $lad a", hen ever# "ornin$ 'erceive "#self environed and surrounded ith bri$ades of

creditors--hu"ble, fanin$, and full of their reverences+ And hilst re"ark that, as look "ore favourabl# u'on and $ive a

cheerfuller countenance to one than to another, the fello thereu'on buildeth a conceit that he shall be the first des'atched and thefore"ost in the date of 'a#"ent, and he valueth "# s"iles at the rate of read# "one#, it see"eth unto "e that then act and

'ersonate the $od of the 'assion of Sau"ure, acco"'anied ith his an$els and cherubi"s+

These are "# flatterers, "# soothers, "# clabacks, "# s"oothers, "# 'arasites, "# saluters, "# $ivers of $ood-"orros, and

'er'etual orators1 hich "akes "e veril# think that the su're"est hei$ht of heroic virtue described b# 5esiod consisteth in bein$ adebtor, herein held the first de$ree in "# co""ence"ent+ Which di$nit#, thou$h all hu"an creatures see" to ai" at and as'ire

thereto, fe nevertheless, because of the difficulties in the a# and encu"brances of hard 'assa$es, are able to reach it, as is easil#

'erceivable b# the ardent desire and vehe"ent lon$in$ harboured in the breast of ever#one to be still creatin$ "ore debts and ne

creditors+

6et doth it not lie in the 'oer of ever#one to be a debtor+ To ac%uire creditors is not at the dis'osure of each "an*s arbitra"ent+

6ou nevertheless ould de'rive "e of this subli"e felicit#+ 6ou ask "e hen ill be out of debt+ Well, to $o #et further on, and

'ossibl# orse in #our conceit, "a# Saint Bablin, the $ood saint, snatch "e, if have not all "# lifeti"e held debt to be as a unionor con/unction of the heavens ith the earth, and the hole ce"ent hereb# the race of "ankind is ke't to$ether1 #ea, of such

virtue and efficac# that, sa#, the hole 'ro$en# of Ada" ould ver# suddenl# 'erish ithout it+ Therefore, 'erha's, do not

think a"iss, hen re'ute it to be the $reat soul of the universe, hich, accordin$ to the o'inion of the Acade"ics, vivifieth all

"anner of thin$s+ n confir"ation hereof, that #ou "a# the better believe it to be so, re'resent unto #ourself, ithout an#'re/udicac# of s'irit, in a clear and serene fanc#, the idea and for" of so"e other orld than this1 take, if #ou 'lease, and la# hold

on the thirtieth of those hich the 'hiloso'her 3etrodorus did enu"erate, herein it is to be su''osed there is no debtor or

creditor, that is to sa#, a orld ithout debts+

There a"on$st the 'lanets ill be no re$ular course, all ill be in disorder+ Hu'iter, reckonin$ hi"self to be nothin$ indebted unto

Saturn, ill $o near to detrude hi" out of his s'here, and ith the 5o"eric chain ill be like to han$ u' the intelli$ences, $ods,

heavens, de"ons, heroes, devils, earth and sea, to$ether ith the other ele"ents+ Saturn, no doubt, co"binin$ ith 3ars ill

reduce that so disturbed orld into a chaos of confusion+


11/113

3ercur# then ould be no "ore sub/ected to the other 'lanets1 he ould scorn to be an# lon$er their 0a"illus, as he as of old

ter"ed in the 4trurian ton$ue+ For it is to be i"a$ined that he is no a# a debtor to the"+

;enus ill be no "ore venerable, because she shall have lent nothin$+ The "oon ill re"ain blood# and obscure+ For to hat end

should the sun i"'art unto her an# of his li$ht) 5e oed her nothin$+ Nor #et ill the sun shine u'on the earth, nor the stars send

don an# $ood influence, because the terrestrial $lobe hath desisted fro" sendin$ u' their onted nourish"ent b# va'ours and

e2halations, hereith 5eraclitus said, the Stoics 'roved, 0icero "aintained, the# ere cherished and ali"ented+ There ouldlikeise be in such a orld no "anner of s#"boli8ation, alteration, nor trans"utation a"on$st the ele"ents1 for the one ill not

estee" itself obli$ed to the other, as havin$ borroed nothin$ at all fro" it+ 4arth then ill not beco"e ater, ater ill not be

chan$ed into air, of air ill be "ade no fire, and fire ill afford no heat unto the earth1 the earth ill 'roduce nothin$ but "onsters,

Titans, $iants1 no rain ill descend u'on it, nor li$ht shine thereon1 no ind ill blo there, nor ill there be in it an# su""er orharvest+ :ucifer ill break loose, and issuin$ forth of the de'th of hell, acco"'anied ith his furies, fiends, and horned devils, ill

$o about to unnestle and drive out of heaven all the $ods, as ell of the $reater as of the lesser nations+ Such a orld ithout

lendin$ ill be no better than a do$-kennel, a 'lace of contention and ran$lin$, "ore unrul# and irre$ular than that of the rector

of (aris1 a devil of an hurl#burl#, and "ore disordered confusion than that of the 'la$ues of Doua#+ 3en ill not then salute oneanother1 it ill be but lost labour to e2'ect aid or succour fro" an#, or to cr# fire, ater, "urder, for none ill 'ut to their hel'in$

hand+ Wh#) 5e lent no "one#, there is nothin$ due to hi"+ Nobod# is concerned in his burnin$, in his shi'reck, in his ruin, or in

his death1 and that because he hitherto had lent nothin$, and ould never thereafter have lent an#thin$+ n short, Faith, 5o'e, and

0harit# ould be %uite banished fro" such a orld--for "en are born to relieve and assist one another1 and in their stead should

succeed and be introduced Defiance, Disdain, and Rancour, ith the "ost e2ecrable troo' of all evils, all i"'recations, and all"iseries+ Whereu'on #ou ill think, and that not a"iss, that (andora had there s'ilt her unluck# bottle+ 3en unto "en ill be

olves, hobthrushers, and $oblins as ere :#caon, Bellero'hon, Nebuchodonosor., 'lunderers, hi$ha# robbers, cutthroats,ra''arees, "urderers, 'oisoners, assassinators, led, icked, "alevolent, 'ernicious haters, set a$ainst ever#bod#, like to sh"ael,

3etabus, or Ti"on the Athenian, ho for that cause as na"ed 3isanthro'os, in such sort that it ould 'rove "uch "ore eas# in

nature to have fish entertained in the air and bullocks fed in the botto" of the ocean, than to su''ort or tolerate a rascall# rabble of

'eo'le that ill not lend+ These fellos, vo, do hate ith a 'erfect hatred1 and if, confor" to the 'attern of this $rievous,'eevish, and 'erverse orld hich lendeth nothin$, #ou fi$ure and liken the little orld, hich is "an, #ou ill find in hi" a

terrible /ustlin$ coil and clutter+ The head ill not lend the si$ht of his e#es to $uide the feet and hands1 the le$s ill refuse to bear

u' the bod#1 the hands ill leave off orkin$ an# "ore for the rest of the "e"bers1 the heart ill be ear# of its continual "otion

for the beatin$ of the 'ulse, and ill no lon$er lend his assistance1 the lun$s ill ithdra the use of their bellos1 the liver illdesist fro" convo#in$ an# "ore blood throu$h the veins for the $ood of the hole1 the bladder ill not be indebted to the kidne#s,

so that the urine thereb# ill be totall# sto''ed+ The brains, in the interi", considerin$ this unnatural course, ill fall into a ravin$

dota$e, and ithhold all feelin$ fro" the sines and "otion fro" the "uscles+ Briefl#, in such a orld ithout order and arra#,oin$ nothin$, lendin$ nothin$, and borroin$ nothin$, #ou ould see a "ore dan$erous cons'iration than that hich Aeso'e2'osed in his A'olo$ue+ Such a orld ill 'erish undoubtedl#1 and not onl# 'erish, but 'erish ver# %uickl#+ Were it Aescula'ius

hi"self, his bod# ould i""ediatel# rot, and the chafin$ soul, full of indi$nation, take its fli$ht to all the devils of hell after "#

"one#+


12/113

(anur$e continueth his discourse in the 'raise of borroers and lenders

&n the contrar#, be 'leased to re'resent unto #our fanc# another orld, herein ever#one lendeth and ever#one oeth, all are

debtors and all creditors+ & ho $reat ill that har"on# be, hich shall thereb# result fro" the re$ular "otions of the heavens

the third book - françois rabelais.doc

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