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COMM 2399: Special Topics in Communication:
LISTENINGTeri L. Varner, Ph.D. Assistant Professor of Communication
Nine Tools of
Empowered
Listening
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“Listening provides empowerment. As
a listener, you don‟t have to „do‟
anything, „fix anything,‟ or „change‟
anything. When people are „heard,‟
they will „do,‟ „fix,‟ and/or „change‟
things for themselves.‟”
--Dr. Carol McCall2
Carol McCall Ph.D.
About Carol McCall For almost five decades, Carol McCall Ph.D., M.C.C. has
been teaching/training people on how to listen and
communicate better.
This educator, edutainer, therapist, business executive and
entrepreneur has reached over 2 million people through her
public workshops, corporate clients and performance
coaching practice.
She is the author of Listen! There’s A World Waiting to Be
Heard., e-book and MP3 series.
Contact: Dr. Carol McCall 1-888-966-8339
www.listeningprofitsu.com
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Carol McCall Ph.D.
Carol McCall Ph.D. M.A., M.C.C., is the founder of The Institute for Global Listening and
Communication. She has more than 40 years of experience as an educator, therapist,
business executive and entrepreneur, and has impacted the lives of more than five
million people through her workshops and public appearances, audio and book sales,
corporate clients and performance coaching practice.
Dr. McCall is creator of The Listening Course and the Possibility of Woman and Life
Development in Communication (LDCC) courses.
An established presence in the Network Marketing arena for 15 years, Carol is a
contributing essayist in the book Leadership in a New Era, a featured expert in the e-
book Coaching For MLM Leaders, and the author of Listen, There's a World Waiting To
Be Heard and the Empowerment of Listening audio series. She has been the subject of
national and international media coverage, including CNBC-Asia, The Iyanla Show,
Clear Channel Radio Network, Success magazine, Essence magazine, plus numerous
business trade and local newspaper articles.
A graduate of Northwestern University, Carol holds a Master's degree from San Jose
State University and received her doctorate from Cambridge International University.
She is a Master Certified Coach designation from the International Coaches Federation.
To learn more about Carol McCall and her schedule of courses and appearances, visit
her website here: listeningprofitsu.com.
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McCall‟s Nine Tools of Empowered
Listening
Over the past five decades, I have found nine
tools that dramatically impact the quality of
communication, especially one‟s ability to listen.
The simple practice of three of them literally
transforms one‟s ability to effectively
communicate.
It is possible to discover the “lid/filters” that color
our listening and communication and how come
we only hear 25% of the message and “make-up”
the remaining 75%.
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McCall‟s Nine Tools of Empowered
Listening
The nine tools are:
1) brevity
2) acknowledgment
3) empowered listening
4) being heard
5) boldness
6) intuition
7) 99:1/MSU
8) completion
9) Drama Cycle/Drama Buster
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Listening Tool #1: Brevity
Brevity:
• to be brief w/interruptions
• speaker – speaks & listener – listens
Clarification interruption: Ex. “Excuse me speaker
and what did you mean by _______?”
Compassionate Interruption: Ex. “Excuse me
speaker. I want to be sure I understood you.”
(not to challenge speaker)
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Listening Tool #2: Acknowledgment
Acknowledgment
• giving feedback about what you heard
• listener brings conversation back to what it means
to the speaker.
• creates a circle of infinity
• speaker knows what listener has done
w/information
Ex. “I know what mean by________. Your
contribution to me is __________________.”
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Listening Tool #3: Empowered Listening
Empowered Listening
• be open to listening to how speaker sees things
• be aware of how speaker advises you to listen
Ex. “How do you want me to listen to you?” *
(i.e. empathetic, reflective, etc.)
• In-Class Exercise: How do you want me to listen?
• Re-visit Varner‟s Handout, “15 Listening Styles in the 21st Century”*
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Listening Tool #3: Empowered Listening
Empowered Listening
Silently believe speaker has these qualities:
a. Leadership – they may know more about
something than you.
b. Capability – speaker has the abilities &
qualities necessary to do or achieve
c. Respect – positive feeling of esteem for a
person
CAUTION: CCJ (criticism, condemnation & judgment)
Negative criticism undermines empowered listening
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Empowered Listening & The Cycle
of Respect
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Listening Tool #4: Being Heard
Being Heard
• tool that allows speaker & listener to have
complete exchange of energy
• check it out
(E.g. paraphrasing, giving feedback)
Stop speaker & ask them to repeat/go back & clarify.
Ex. “I didn‟t understand what you meant by____.”
Ex. “This is what I heard. Is this what you
meant?”
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Listening Tool #5: Boldness
Boldness
• having speaker speak authentically
• not rude just sincere
• interrupt w/respect & sincerity
• request for feedback
• use nonthreatening, non-defensive voice & eye
contact
• naturally leads to brevity
Ex. “That word is offensive to me. “ (listener)
“Chill out. Saying, „That‟s so gay!” is just a harmless expression.”
(speaker)
“Then in my presence I would prefer you not use that expression.”
(listener „s response). 13
Listening Tool #6: Intuition
Intuition
• follow your hunch
• when in doubt check it out
Ex. “My boss is killing me.”
(speaker)
Kyle (your boss) is getting on your nerves.
(listener)
Outside class activity: Practice intuiting who is
calling. Put a dime in a jar for each correct call
intuited.
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Listening Tool #7: 99/One Rule
99: 1
• 99% of people‟s reactions have nothing to do
with you.
• 1% of what people are reacting to comes from the
fact that your „humanness’ triggers
something in them and the thought they
have about your humanness.
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Listening Tool #7: 99/One Rule
99: 1
SIMILARLY
• 99% of your reactions to people have nothing to
do with them.
• 1% of your reactions are based on their
„humanness’ triggering something in you
and the thought they have about your
humanness.
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Listening Tool #7: MSU
MSU
• making stuff up
• it‟s a disclaimer until you trust your intuition and check
“it” out
Ex. “I‟m going to do it myself.” (speaker wants to practice
being autonomous)
You don‟t want my help. (listener hears rejection &
doesn‟t clarify speaker‟s statement)
Try this: (Listener interrupts with) “I just made up that… Is that
true? I am trying to clear up possible miscommunication.” OR
“Excuse me, I made up that…” 17
Listening Tool #8: Completion
Completion
• about being present in the moment
• satisfied in the moment
• completion w/conversation for now
When you are complete – the next event can be started
They may have other things going on however unless you
are a therapist – leave it alone.
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Listening Tool #9: Drama Buster
Drama Cycle/Drama Buster
• a repetitive, automatic pattern of behavior that is
“thought-driven” followed by feeling, followed by
action
• pattern happens in a 4-part cycle that‟s complete
within 30 seconds or less
• words, issues, dishonored values, situations, &/or
personalities trigger our “drama cycles.”
• when our drama cycles are triggered, our
communication becomes distorted & ineffective –
it prevents effective listening
• we tune out, prejudge, criticize, & condemn
speaker, situation & self.19
Listening Tool #9: Drama Buster
Set 1: Thought_______________
Feeling________________
Action_________________
Set 2: Thought_______________
Feeling________________
Action_________________
Set 3: Thought_______________
Feeling________________
Action_________________
Set 4: Thought_______________
Feeling________________
Action_________________
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Drama Buster
Here is a 4-step process to assist you to recognize and bust
your drama cycle:
“Listening is the “core” of
communication. When you really
listen, you don‟t have to “worry” about
your lines, you‟ll know what to say
because you‟ve been „listening!‟”
--Dr. Carol McCall
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McCall‟s Nine Tools of Empowered
Listening: Brevity
The nine tools are:
1) brevity
2) acknowledgment
3) empowered listening
4) being heard
5) boldness
6) intuition
7) 99:1/MSU
8) completion
9) Drama Cycle/Drama Buster
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COMM 2399: Special Topics in Communication:
LISTENINGTeri L. Varner, Ph.D. Assistant Professor of Communication
Nine Tools of
Empowered
Listening
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