february 2011 - south jersey mom magazine

February 2011

how toCHOOSEthe rightPRESCHOOLPROGRAM

NO

REQUIREDimportantDENTAL

QUESTIONSanswered

Is your

THYROIDthe causeof your

RECONNECT with your spouse on DATE NIGHT

Learn yourA,B,C’s–

WEIGHTGAIN?

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Since my children wereborn, I always knewthe day would come

when they would ask meabout their skin color. Ihave thought a lot abouthow I would respond tothis question since I am

Caucasian and my husband is biracial: halfAfrican-American and half Caucasian. Childrenaren’t born biased against certain races oreven noticing skin color. This is something thatis learned over time.

My very best friend said her daughterwas about 5 years old when she asked,“Mommy, why am I brown and you are pink?“I wondered when our children would noticethat daddy’s skin was darker than mine. Or ifKayden noticed that his skin color was differ-ent than mine and his dad’s.

My husband and I make every effort notto ever describe someone by their skin color.We might describe them as tall, or having longhair or wearing a red shirt, but we never say,“the black guy or white lady,” in front of them.

Anyway, I knew the day would comewhen my children started noticing differentskin colors. As early as a few short monthsago, we were at Friendly’s and our regularwaiter there is African-American. Kaydenasked me his name one day, and I said, “Whoare you talking about?” And he said, “Youknow, our server at Friendly’s with short hair.” I was so surprised that that was how he described our waiter. (Rather than using his skin color to describe him... as so manyadults do).

Since that was so recent, I wasreally shocked tonight when wewere walking through a store andKayden asks, “Mom, what color amI?” I thought I knew what he wasimplying, but I didn’t want toassume. So I ask, “What do youmean?” And he says, “What color isthis?” And he points to his cheek.Again, I say, “What do you mean?”And he says, “My body. What coloris my body?” There was no denyingit now. It was clear what he wasasking. I had no idea what to say. So I ask,“What color do you think you are?” He says,“Ummm, light brown.”

I thought this was so precious andinsightful from a 4 year old. “You’re right!” Isay. “Everyone has a different color of skin.Some are lighter and some are darker.” Thenhe says, “Like sissy and daddy.” Wow! I waseven more shocked. He obviously noticed thathis sister and father are darker than me andhim. When did he start noticing that?

I didn’t want to make a big deal out ofthis. Race has never been an issue in our fam-ily. In our family, love has no color. So I just leftit at that. I’m sure he will have more questionsas he gets older, but for now, I want him tofocus on liking and loving people for who theyare, not what they look like.✲

Your Friend and Fellow MOM,

www.southjerseymom.com February 2011 | 3

Table ofContents

February 2011

mom 2 mom8 Learn Your A,B,C’s—How to Choose

the Right Preschool Program

10 Be the Sports Parent Your Kid Can

Be Proud Of

moms R women 211 Reconnect with Your Spouse on

Date Night

12 What is the Relationship Between

Thyroid and Weight Gain?

know 2 grow13 Parents’ Guide to Braces

14 No Drilling Required: Important

Dental Questions Answered

15 Seven Creative Ways to Tell Kids

You Love Them

features18 Local Moms Earn Extra Income with

Home-Based Business

also in this issue3 editor’s note

5 nana’s 2 sense

6 life sentences

21 things 2 do

22 resource guide

letter from the editor

Dear Readers,

Every month, South Jersey MOMwill feature a local child on the cover!

Parent Name: ____________________________________

Address: ________________________________________

City______________________ State_____ Zip__________

Phone: __________________________________________

Child’s Name & DOB: ______________________________

________________________________________________

Email: __________________________________________

Is your child theCUTEST KID IN TOWN?

If you think you have the cutestkid in town, send a 4x6 photo and a$15 entry fee (per household) toP.O. Box 2413, Vineland, NJ 08362-2413. Please make checkspayable to Superior Graphics.

If your child(ren) is/are selected,we will arrange a FREE profession-al photo shoot and they could beon our next cover for all yourfriends and family to see! Sorry, photoscannot be returned.

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It breaks my heartwhen the little onesare sick. So sick

that even they knowthey need that nap;when they need extrahugs and when theyneed to be held and

kept warm and cuddled, a lot. I was so happy to see Kayden back to his

perky, bubbly, energetic self after days of sleep-ing most of the time. He was sick with somesort of stomach ailment. As Kayden andCamille leave today, I give them my usual bighug, kiss and “I love you so much.” But today Igive Kayden an extra squeeze and add, “I’m sohappy you are feeling better and not sick any-more.” In his infinite 4-year-old wisdom hereplies, “It takes a lot of love to get betterwhen you are sick.” My heart swells. He getsit! He understands love. Children are sosmart. I pray this little one keeps that feeling oflove in his heart all his life. I am so proud of hisparents. It’s easy to see when parents showtheir children lots of love.

How I wish those three words were saidto me when I was a child. I do not everremember my parents telling me they lovedme; sad, but true. I do not remember them say-ing those words to each other either. I keeptelling myself things were different then.Parents were different. Raising children was a chore. We did not do “family things.” Isaw other families having fun together and

wondered why my family did not. Iwas embarrassed to be seen withmy parents because most of thetime they argued, yes, even in public.I think they simply did not like eachother anymore. I wonder if theyever really did.

My little sister recently remind-ed me how wonderful it would havebeen if we had appreciated our children whenthey were little as much as we appreciated ourgrandchildren now. Is it because we do nothave to concern ourselves with discipliningour grandchildren like we did our children? Isthat why?

What if we really listened to our childrenthe moment they “get it?” They do tell us, likemy sweet grandson did. Why don’t we listen?How can such epiphany come from such a tinylittle person, seemingly so naive?

If parents would just say those threewords more often and hug and be close toeach other and their children, how much better would the world be today? So, no matter what, show them you love them. Tellthem you love them, every day. ✲

—Nana JeanNana Jean is a South Jersey grandmother with two daughters and six grandchildren. Enjoy her stories abouther 39+ years as a mom and 20 years as a grandmotheras she shares her experiences and lessons learned withlots of laughs and tears along the way.

February 2011


CEO/Publisher:Christopher Ognibene • (609) 670-1794

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Executive Editor Adrienne Richardson • (856) [email protected]

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For General Advertising Inquiries:[email protected](609) 280-1741

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Production ManagerLisa Celfo

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Contributing WritersJeanette Giza, Kate Hogan, Julie LandryLaviolette, Fran LoBiondo, Heidi Smith

Luedtke, Jamie Roes, Jan Udlock

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It takes a lot of lovenana’s 2 sense

On the COVERCutest Kid In Town Winner: Alexandra is an energetic 7-year-old from Williamstown. She enjoys playing soccer, video games, board games, drawing, painting, playing with friends and her dogs “Thor” and “Coco.” She also loves making people laugh and laughing herself. Photo by Shirley MagiltonPhotography.[ ]

“ Like” South Jersey MOM magazine on Facebook

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On day two of the big nor’east-er, it’s colder than Nanook’sknickers and the drifts are

thigh high. A howling wind speeds downour street fast enough to carry away asmall child — I know, because I saw one

mom try it. That little imp was the perfectweight to achieve liftoff.

Oh, don’t get offended. You know you’vethought about it.

I hate cold weather, but I’m tempted to gooutside just to exchange the stale air in mylungs. I know I can withstand the hostile climate; I have self-medicated for stress with astream of butter cookies, so I am all about lay-ers. My fear was that I might get stuck in a snowdrift, and my kids might leave me there. I’vebeen a little cranky during our forced paralysis.

During my unfortunate incarceration, I satin my kitchen and read an article in The WallStreet Journal titled, “Move Over, McMansions:Living Simply in Small Houses.”

Yes, I read the Journal. After I do the cross-word puzzle. Don’t laugh; those puzzles haveexpanded my knowledge of the world. For

instance, do you know the eight-letter answerto “One protected by Offica Pupp?” I do. “KrazyKat.” (Youngsters: that’s an old comic strip.)

You see? Edifying. Anyway, back to the article. It’s a growing

trend in house design. For a fraction of the costof a traditionally-built house, you can purchasethese bite-size dwellings and I believe you canwheel them off the lot. They are that small.

According to the article, the averageAmerican home has 2,400 square feet of space.Architects are now building micro homes thatspan from a few hundred to a little more thana thousand square feet, and contain most of theamenities of larger dwellings, including kitchensand bathrooms.

“Micro homes often rely on artful space-enhancing designs. Still, the houses can onlyhold so much,” I read.

Exactly, I mused, looking around at mykitchen counters strewn with gifts unwrappedbut not put away. Simple. Unencumbered. Can’thold a lot of clutter. And surely only one toiletto clean.

But I have been there before. After oursecond child was born, it was the winter of ’96,

and I was houseboundby a succession of icestorms which made it irresponsible to godriving on treacher-ous roads with the boys. It was chaotic condoclaustrophobia. The kids were hyper, their toyscovered every floor. If I close my eyes, I can findmyself right back in that kitchen, peeringthrough curtains of killer icicles with the tic ticticking of sleet against the panes. That winterwent on forever, and I was moving ever closerto the edge of Xannie-Land.

By the summer, at my insistence, wemoved to a house with two stories, a big yard— and three toilets.

Fast-forward 15 years, and here I am, onceagain snowed in, now dreaming of a one-personcell on wheels with no room for a dirty laundrypile. Perhaps I will park it on the grounds of amonastery.

In Tahiti.✲Fran LoBiondo of Vineland has children in grade school, highschool and college. A Purdue University graduate with adegree in Journalism, she has written about parenting, foodand fun for 25 yrs.

Going Simple in a Tiny Houselife senten

ces

By Fran LoBiondo


The Center for Autism Research at The Children’sHospital of Philadelphia islooking for participants fora research study focusingon early brain development.

Who are we looking for?• Infant siblings of typically developing children

• Infant siblings of children with autism

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LEARN YOUR A, B, C’s —How to CHOOSE the Right PRESCHOOL Program

It’s hard to believe, but it’s time to start thinking about schoolfor your precious, little one! It probably seems as if they justgot out of diapers, but many preschool programs start around

the age of three, some even younger. Although the curricu-lum may seem simple child’s play, some thought and planning isbest.

Children are expected (somewhat unofficially) to knowthe alphabet and numbers before they enter elementaryschool. So for many, the role of preschool has taken the placeof the kindergarten of yester year. Nursery schoolis very much about socialization, having fun andbeing happy. However, many schools have figuredout how to teach academics without the kids evenrealizing it!

Some points to consider are class size, location, curriculum, teacher accreditations, evensnack distribution. But after all is said and done,you should trust your gut instinct. Amy Baran of Cherry Hill and amother of four feels “it’s often over thought and overdone. I have twocriteria for preschool — safe and happy.” You want their first associationswith school to be positive. There is plenty of time for your child to dreadschool!

Unfortunately in this day and age, children’s safety is a big concern.You are going to want to make sure that the school you choose has pro-cedures and competent personnel in place. Any good school will share

their safety procedures with you. If they won’t, take your checkand run the other way.

“Preschool should be a warm and welcoming first bridgebetween home and school,“ says Diane Balfour, Director of TheSchoolhouse Nursery School and Kindergarten in Cherry Hilland Mt. Laurel for the 2010-11 school year. “When you visit a

school, you should be able to go into the classrooms,meet the teachers and get a good sense of the envi-ronment.” After all, your child may be there for sev-eral years and it might end up being your home awayfrom home.

Nursery school should be a place where yourchild is set up for success at every turn. Not that they

won’t have some difficulties along the way, but that is lifeAND socialization – learning appropriate ways to react to

situations, both positive and negative. Although a temper tantrum at theage of 3 is perfectly normal, it’s really wrong at age 25. So preschoolstarts kids on the right path to acting like civilized human beings!

To help narrow down your search, consider the following:

Location: How long does it take to get to the school? Is there a lot oftraffic along the way? Remember, we are talking about very young children and the flu can come on quickly. You won’t want to be too faraway when you get that phone call to come and pick up your child!

Philosophy: Is the school religious based? Is their emphasis on academ-ics, socialization or strictly free play time? Almost any philosophy is fine,as long as it aligns with your parenting philosophy.

Credentials: Is the school licensed and accredited? Go towww.state.nj.us/dcf/divisions/licensing for a list of all licensed child carecenters in New Jersey. Are the teachers certified? Will your child havethe same caregiver every day? What is the teacher/student ratio?

Hours: Are you looking for your child to have a few hours of fun andlearning or do you need full time daycare while at work? There is a dif-ference between day care centers and preschools. Be sure the facilityyou choose is able to meet your needs. Your child’s preschool years areprecious and few – don’t forget to savor them!✲

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Playing team sports is an important milestone in many kids’ lives. Teamsports teach discipline, appropriate behavior in winning and losing,importance of physical exercise, self-confidence and more. Parents

play an important role in this learning curve, because kids take cues fromtheir parents on what’s appropriate behavior and what’s not.

All parents want their kid to do well and even to shine on the court. Inthe process of support and excitement, are you encouraging your child orare you being a pain on the field? Here are some guidelines to help you bethe best sports parent you can.

Have a ConversationTalk with your kids about different team sports. Whatare they interested in? Discuss with your kidsabout playing sports and about the major ben-efit of team sports; that is, making friends.Talk with your spouse and make sure it’snot your agenda for your child to playthe sport you once played. Then signhim up and write the check.

“One of the primary reasonsyoungsters participate in sports is tohave a sense of accomplishment andself-esteem. This is difficult to dowhen a parent is trying to vicarious-ly live through his child’s perform-ance,” says Joe Cummings, CEO andExecutive Director of National SoccerCoaches Association of America.

Be HelpfulInvolvement with your child’s team speaksvolumes of support to your child. Whether youbring snacks, take team pictures, coordinate par-ties afterward or your business sponsors the team, getinvolved. If the coach wants parent participation in the team’spractice, get on the field and help out.

Families’ calendars get crazy full when there is more than one child inthe family playing on a sports team. However, make arrangements to attendas many games as possible. If only one parent at a time can attend the game,switch up parents so both parents attend everyone’s game. If you have near-by family members, invite them to a few games. If you do not have any imme-diate family members living close by, invite a neighbor or family friend towatch a game.

Coaches and other team players count on each other to be on time forboth practices and games. “Ensuring that the players are properly equippedand that they are punctual for practices and for games are great ways par-ents can support their kids,” says Cummings.

It’s easy to believe sports equipment ads that say the right equipmentwill help your child become a better athlete. Do not buy into the hype.Children do not need undue pressure put on them by having a parent buythe best or most expensive equipment. Your kid will shine even if he or shedoesn’t have a pair of $120 sports shoes.

At the Game There are different roles and responsibilities at a game. A parent’s job is toprovide emotional support for the child and leave the coaching to the coach. “Respect the coach’s expertise and, if they are volunteer coaches with littlecoaching experience, respect the time and effort they are devoting,” says Dr.Jim Taylor, sport psychologist and author of Positive Pushing: How to Raise aSuccessful and Happy Child.

Cheer for all the kids on the team regardless of how they do. Beforethe game, ask your child if he would prefer you to cheer for him loudly orsoftly. Some kids would prefer their parents to not cheer for them because

it causes undue pressure on them. On the other hand, if you have achild that wants the loud banter, have a nickname for your kid.

He will hear the pet name among the screaming fans.

Let Your Kids FailWatching your child strike out or repeatedly miss a

basket is painful for a parent, yet allow-ing kids to fail is a part of the maturingprocess. Children are learning skills as well ascharacter both when they achieve and whenthey are disappointed.

A Poor Call After a game, if your kid brings up the topic

of a bad call from the referee, talk with him orher about it. However, do not let your child

have a victim mentality that says their team lostbecause of the ref’s poor calls.

“Referees are human and are bound to makea legitimate mistake or two during any game.

However, there also is the matter of a “perceived mis-take,” where the difference in viewing the angle can make

all the difference,” says Cummings. Criticizing the umpire’sinconsistent calls does not help anyone in the long run.

Inappropriate BehaviorMost sports organizations have parent conduct rules. Coaches normallyreview them with the parents before formal games begin. Referees are enti-tled to throw a parent out of the game for inappropriate behavior or ban himfrom the sports park for the rest of the game. If a parent does not stop thebehavior, the child’s team will automatically forfeit the game. Dr. Taylor rec-ommends that the coach or another parent not talk down to the offendingparent, but focus on the offending behavior and explain how it hurts thechild.

If you, as a parent, are getting a little too involved in your child’s sport,slow down a bit by sitting farther down the field away from the action. “Winning is not the point, because few children will rise very far up the com-petitive ladder,” says Dr. Taylor.

Team sports can be fun for the entire family and can give a child arewarding experience.

“The goal of sports is to instill a love of sport, exercise, physical activi-ty, have fun, develop good motor skills and essential life skills,” says Dr. Taylor.Now, go out and play ball!✲Jan Udlock is a mom of five and a freelance writer. She had to sit farther down the third baselineto not get too involved in her sons’ games.

Be the Sports Parent Your Kid Can be Proud Of By Jan Udlock

If you are like most parents, doctor’s appoint-ments, soccer practices, dance classes andpiano lessons are what fill up the dates of

your monthly calendar; however, when is thelast time that a “Date Night with Spouse” occu-pied a cherished Friday or Saturday night slot?

Sadly, parents’ schedules are more hecticthan ever and the old adage, “Something’s gottagive,” is usually said with spouses spending qual-ity time together at stake. While it initiallyseems to be the easiest choice to eliminate, it’snot the wisest or healthiest decision. Makingtime for your spouse strengthens your relation-ship, sets a good example for your children, andgives you something to look forward to on thebusy schedule. Here are a few ideas that mayhelp you get started on planning your DateNight:

Learn a New Activity Together – Alwayswanted to learn the Fox Trot or how to makean amazing Coq au Vin? Why not do it togeth-er? Many community colleges offer a wide

variety of eveningcontinued educa-tion and personalgrowth classesthat allow you to

be introduced to something you may havealways wanted to do, but never found the time.

Volunteer – If you want to do somethinggood for others while doing something goodfor your relationship, then consider volunteer-ing for part or all of your Date Night. You mayalready volunteer regularly, but if not, there aremany web sites that offer hundreds of optionsaccording to your location, life passions andterm of commitment.

Visit the Family Places without theWhole Family – Do you have season passesto the zoo, aquarium, or museum but only usethem with the kids? You may be amazed to seethe same things in an entirely different waywhen you visit without the kids. Best of all,since they are already pre-paid passes, theremay be some extra money left over to share anice cream cone.

Get Outside – Fresh air alters your brain’slevel of serotonin, which helps improve your

mood. Couple that fact with spending qualitytime with your spouse and your cheeks maybecome sore from smiling so much after thisdate idea! A walk on the beach, a round ofminiature golf, horseback riding, or even a runin your neighborhood together are a few sim-ple ways to incorporate good life choices andquality time together.

Weekend Getaways – Sometimes, just afew hours to unwind and reconnect is notenough. South Jersey is such a convenient loca-tion that there are many wonderful options toexplore, no matter the weather. A Bed andBreakfast at the beach, a ski lodge in thePoconos, or a historic hotel in Center City,Philadelphia are just a few options that are only about an hour drive from your home. That means less time driving and more timeenjoying your destination and each other.

While it does not matter what you do onyour date, it does matter that you actually havethe dates. So, place it on the calendar, line upthe babysitter well in advance, make the reser-vations or arrangements needed for the dateand look forward to having fun together!✲

By Jamie Roes

Reconnect with your spouse on Date Night

mom

s R wom

en 2


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It has been appreciated for a very long timethat there is a complex relationshipbetween thyroid disease and weight gain.

The thyroid hormone regulates metabolism.Therefore, if your thyroid is not functioningproperly, could this be the cause of yourweight gain? Read on to find out.

HYPOTHYROIDISM AND THYROID HORMONESince a person with hypothyroidism has adecreased basal metabolic rate (BMR), anunderactive thyroid is generally associatedwith some weight gain. The weight gain is oftengreater in those individuals with more severehypothyroidism.

The cause of the weight gain in hypothy-roid individuals is also complex, and not alwaysrelated to excess fat accumulation. Most of theextra weight gained in hypothy-roid individuals is due to excessaccumulation of salt and water.Massive weight gain is rarelyassociated with hypothyroidism.In general, 5-10 pounds of bodyweight may be attributable tothe thyroid, depending on theseverity of the hypothyroidism.Finally, if weight gain is the onlysymptom of hypothyroidismthat is present, it’s less likelythat the weight gain is solely dueto the thyroid.

How much weight can Iexpect to lose once thehypothyroidism is treated?Since much of the weight gain inhypothyroidism is accumulationin salt and water, when thehypothyroidism is treated onecan expect a small (usually lessthan 10 percent of body weight)weight loss.

Treatment of the abnormalstate of hypothyroidism withthyroid hormone should resultin a return of body weight towhat it was before the hypothy-roidism developed. However,since hypothyroidism usuallydevelops over a long period oftime, it fairly common to find

that there is no significant weight loss aftersuccessful treatment of hypothyroidism. Again,if all of the other symptoms of hypothy-roidism, with the exception of weight gain, areresolved with treatment with thyroid hor-mone, it’s less likely that the weight gain issolely due to the thyroid. Once hypothy-roidism has been treated and thyroid hor-mone levels have returned to the normalrange on thyroid hormone, the ability to gainor lose weight is the same as in individualswho do not have thyroid problems.

Can thyroid hormone be used to help melose weight? Thyroid hormones have been used as a weightloss tool in the past. Many studies have shownthat excess thyroid hormone treatment can

help produce more weight loss than can beachieved by dieting alone.

However, once the excess thyroid hor-mone is stopped, the excess weight loss is usually regained. Furthermore, there may besignificant negative consequences from the useof thyroid hormone to help with weight loss,such as the loss of muscle protein in additionto any loss of body fat. Pushing the thyroidhormone dose to cause thyroid hormone lev-els to be elevated is unlikely to significantlychange weight and may result in other meta-bolic problems.✲For more information, contact the American ThyroidAssociation at www.thyroid.org or contact your primarycare physician.

What is the RELATIONSHIP between THYROIDand

Amouth full of train tracks used to be justanother awkward sign of puberty,almost a rite of passage for those enter-

ing their teens. But these days, it’s more com-mon to see elementary school kids sporting agrin full of tin, as some orthodontic treatmentsare beginning at an earlier age.

With a price tag in the thousands, theneed for braces is usually a pronouncementevery parent dreads, bringing to mind thegeeky metal smiles and headgear of years’past.

But experts say better materials and newtreatment strategies are making braces workmore effectively these days, while giving thepatient more options as to how they look.

Here are the basics every parent needsto know:

What’s the difference between a dentistand an orthodontist?An orthodontist has completed dental school,then an additional two to three years of studyon how to move teeth, says Dr. Robert Bray,president of the American Association ofOrthodontists.

When should a child be screened?The American Association of Orthodontistsrecommends children be screened at age 7,around the time when their permanent upperteeth are coming in. “We are trying to pick upon things that may be way out of line and try-ing to find things that may affect their growthor smile,” Bray says. “But this doesn’t meanevery child will need to be treated that young;It depends upon the patient.”

Braces used to be for teens, why are kidsgetting braces at an earlier age?The trend began about 15 to 20 years ago,when it was determined that early interven-tion could help in some specific cases, Braysays. For example, thumb sucking can create afunctional problem that affects permanentteeth or the bone structure of permanent

teeth. It’s best corrected early. Though sometreatments are beginning earlier, the averageage of treatment is about 12.

How can a parent know for sure a childneeds braces?If you are seeing a problem in your child’smouth, such as overcrowding or a severeoverbite, see a specialist and listen to whatthey have to say, Bray advises. Most orthodon-tists will take photographs and tell you whatneeds to be improved.

“If you have doubts, or if something do-esn’t make sense, you can certainly get a sec-ond opinion,” Bray adds.

How have braces improved over theyears?Today, instead of the metal bands that wrapeach tooth, orthodontists have a number oftools to choose from. The most commonlyused and least expensive are metal bracketsthat attach directly to the teeth. Wires thatrun through the brackets are held in place bytiny round rubber bands and apply gentle pres-sure to move the teeth. Different colored rub-ber bands and even metal brackets in theshape of hearts, footballs and flowers canallow the child to personalize their look.

There are several more expensiveoptions that may be used, depending on whatneeds to be corrected. Tooth-colored ceramicbrackets lessen the look of braces. Self-ligatingbraces are metal brackets that do not requirerubber bands to hold the wires. Lingual bracesfit behind the teeth. Invisalign are clear brack-ets worn over the teeth.

How do new braces materials affecttreatment plans?“The change is not so much in shorteningtreatment plans. But new materials have

changed treatments in other ways. For exam-ple, self-ligating braces can spare someonewith a severely overcrowded mouth thenecessity of having teeth pulled.

Mouths respond differently to thesebraces, which do not require rubber bands tohold the wires to the brackets, and work with-out stressing the tissue or bone or hurtingteeth, Bray says. The downside is they cost 50to 100 percent more than metal brackets.

How much do braces cost?Prices range from $3,500 to $6,500.

What can affect the rate of success?The patient has to do what they are supposedto do – take care of their teeth, follow instruc-tions and avoid food that can break appliances.How can parents help the process? Parentsmust be behind the choice 100 percent orthey’re wasting their money. If a parent is feed-ing their kid Starbursts and Blow Pops andwires are popping and breaking off left andright, then treatment is going to take longer.

What is the average length of treat-ment?About two years. But if the patient is not com-pliant, they’re eating the wrong things, appli-ances are breaking or they’re not taking careof their teeth, it can be longer.

What should a parent ask on a first visitto an orthodontist?“First listen, and hear the person out, withoutworrying about the time or cost,” Bray says.“Then ask, what absolutely needs to be donenow and what can be done later?”✲

Julie Landry Laviolette is a mom of two who wore bracesherself. Now she’s saving up for her daughter’s turn.


know 2 grow

Parents’

Guide to

BracesBy Julie Landry Laviolette


According to the CDC, over 19 percentof children age 2-19 have untreatedcavities. Many parents are unsure when

to start taking their children to the dentist,and what proper dental hygiene really means.We spoke to local pediatric dentist, Dr.William Beck of South Jersey PediatricDentistry in Vineland and asked him parents’pressing dental questions.

Q: Why does my toddler have badbreath and what can I do about it?A: The number one cause of bad breath ispoor oral hygiene. Bacteria in the mouth caus-es the odor, so brushing twice a day and floss-ing is the most effective way of getting rid ofbad breath. If you are doing those things, andthe bad breath persists, there may be otherproblems. Tonsilitis, sinus conditions, gastricissue and systemic problems may exist.Consult your pediatrician if you suspect thereis a problem. Also, seasonal allergies can alsocause bad breath and this usually is resolvedonce allergy season is over.

Q: When should I start flossing mychild’s teeth?A: As soon as teeth are touching each other,you should start flossing in between them. Ifthere are large gaps between the teeth, floss-ing is not necessary. But once they are fittingtightly together, flossing is very important.

Q: When should I start taking my childto the dentist?A: For first time parents, I recommend parentsbring in the child six months after the firsttooth has come in. We like to take the time toeducate the parents about proper oral hygieneand answer any questions they may have.

Q: Is it harmful for my child to swallowtoothpaste with fluoride in it?A: Yes! Children should use toothpaste with-out fluoride until they are able to spit thetoothpaste out when brushing. It’s ok if theyswallow a little bit here and there, but swal-lowing it every day can cause major toothproblems down the road.

Q: My 11 month old has four teeth. Do Ineed to brush them?A: Yes! As soon as your child’s teeth come in,you should start brushing them.

Q: Is it ok for my 4 year old to chewgum?A: Chewing gum occasionally is ok as long asit’s sugar-free gum. If your child has cavities,they should not chew gum as the chewingaction together with the gum can push stuffdown into the cavity space and make it worse.

Q: When will my child lose their firsttooth?A: On average, children start losing their teetharound age 6. However, if they got their firsttooth prior to 6 months of age, they may losetheir first tooth earlier. Children whose teeth

came in late, could lose their first tootharound age 7 or 8. The earliest a child willprobably lose a tooth is age 4.

Q: How can I prepare my child for theirfirst visit to the dentist?A: Don’t make a big deal out of it. Children aresmart, and if you make a big deal out of goingto the dentist, they will start to wonder whysuch a fuss is being made and this could makethem anxious. Act like visiting the dentist isjust a regular every day experience. You couldalso bring them with you when you visit thedentist so they can see mommy or daddy gettheir teeth cleaned.

Q: Do you have any other tips for par-ents?A: Remember that baby teeth have to betaken care of just like adult teeth. Brushingtwice a day and flossing is very important.

Also, parents often think a sippy cup orjuice box is better for their child than a bottle.But what’s more important is what’s IN thecontainer, not what type of container it is. Thesugar in the drinks that are in those contain-ers is actually what causes damage to theteeth and gums. If your child is using a sippycup for comfort, fill it with water instead ofjuice. The longer the sugar is in touch with theteeth, the more damage will be caused. Sobrush their teeth often.✲Dr. Beck’s office is located at 3017 E. Chestnut Ave, SteD10, Vineland, NJ. For questions or to make your child anappointment, call (856) 205-0099.

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Ditch the heart-shaped box of chocolatesand show your little cherubs how muchyou love them with these creative gifts

and activities. You will make Valentine’s Day funfor everyone – and you may even help yourdaughter forget that she did not get roses fromthe boy she not-so-secretly likes.

Worth a Fortune. Bake your own for-tune cookies with personalized mes-sages inside to remind your kids justhow lucky you are to have them. Findrecipes online at AllRecipes.com. Gotbakers block? Order custom cookies online at E-FortuneCookie.com.

Bursting with Love.Write a Valentinenote on small strips of paper and slipeach strip into an inflated balloon beforetying the knots. Let your child hop andpop and then re-assemble the phrases ofyour love letter. Make sure to keep bal-loon bits away from little mouths – theycan be a choking hazard.

Hungry for Love. Make lunchtime allabout hearts by cutting kids’ sandwichesinto a heart shape using a cookie cutteror knife. Want to go all out? Buy bread tinted pink at your local bakery to makesandwiches extra-Valentiney.

Just Say “Spaaaaa.” Make bath timeextra special with bubble bath, heart-shaped soaps, and pink and red bath tubpaints. To make your own, mix a fewdrops of food coloring into a dollop ofshaving cream in a bowl. Let kids paintthe walls of the tub or themselves forsome foamy fun. Be careful to check thatthe paints will not stain fixtures or skinbefore indulging.

Buy the Book. Give your child a bookthat says how much you love him or her.For little readers, try I Love You Throughand Through (by Bernadette Shustak,Cartwheel, 2005). Take an older child ona date to the bookstore and enjoy a hot

chocolate together while browsing. Callit a date.

Puzzled by Love. Buy a do-it-yourselfpuzzle card or create one yourself bymounting a picture and message oncardstock and cutting puzzle pieces yourchild can reassemble. Decorate a box orenvelope to hold the pieces.

Can’t Hide My Love for You. Have ascavenger hunt at home. Hide chocolatekisses with clues attached to direct yourchild to a final family event – perhaps alove-themed movie night or an indoordinner picnic, complete with a heart-shaped pizza. Spending time together isthe best gift of all.✲

Heidi Smith Luedtke fell head-over-heels in love with her son from the moment she saw him. Her blog on parenting as a leadership experience can be found atwww.LeadingMama.com

You Love Them3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

By Heidi Smith Luedtke

1.

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Seven Creative Ways to Tell Kids

On the fun side, it’s a time to remember the wonderful contribu-tions from black individuals and the race at large: everythingfrom gospel music to Cajun food to the 101 inventions listed on

Biography.com (www.biography.com/blackhistory). Let’s pause to examine ourselves and see if there may be any harm-

ful prejudice—to any category of people—lingering in our minds andhearts and revealing itself to our children.

Since prejudice is usually passed down through generations, as par-ents we can refuse to pass it on and help put a stop to it. Since prejudicelimits one’s ability to empathize and understand one another, prejudicewill not serve our children well in this world of diverse people.

It’s imperative that you show no signs of it in front of your kids sothat their future can remain wide open for them. Who knows whereyour children will be working, what hobbies and volunteer activities theywill choose, or with whom they will fall in love? If they grow up free fromprejudice, their opportunities will be far greater and their social interac-tions far less complicated than otherwise.

All of this is tricky, however, because you DO want to communicateyour values, opinions and beliefs with your children. The challenge is to show respect to all kinds of people, even when you disagree with theirviewpoints or life choices, and to keep your comments about people freefrom unfavorable generalizations. The tone of your voice is also impor-tant. Go ahead and tell your children, for example, how horrible smok-ing is for Uncle Joe, but keep the disgust for Uncle Joe himself out of yourvoice.

I am grateful that one thing my parents had in common was free-dom from prejudice. They both put a high value on respecting an individ-ual, whether a stranger, neighbor, politician, grocery store bagger orcleaning lady.

My father still delights in striking up conversations with people of allsizes, shapes, colors and ages. Sure, being a social kindof guy helps, but being free from prejudice is onereason he’s so social. The fact is, when you arewithout prejudice, you tend to be aware of

February is Black History Month and no matter what your nationality, it’s a time tocelebrate the strides our country has made toward its ideal of liberty for all and toremember those who have suffered along the way.

Show No Signs OfPREJUDICE


By Gail Perry Johnston

the basic human traits that you have in common withothers, which, in turn, makes you less afraid and uncom-fortable around others, which makes you more social!

Have you noticed that I have used a form of theword “free” four times in this article? We are truly talk-ing about freedom here. Cast systems, communism andoppressive governments are rooted in prejudice.Prejudice starts small, but can spread wickedly, and it’sto be avoided with diligence.

For the purpose of your parenting, I would like toreiterate that you can have firm opinions about certainmatters, but still be without prejudice. For example, youcan believe in longer prison sentences for sex offend-ers, but still be a forgiving person. It’s not hypocriticalto make a distinction between the need for social jus-tice to prevent a society from falling apart and theimportance of compassion in your personal relation-ships.

At the kid level, prejudice may be experiencedthrough the common “clique.” If your kids find them-selves in a clique, let them know how happy you arethat they have special friends, but do your best toexplain that they must think for themselves and notmake decisions based on the mood of the group or thewhim of its leader.

In other words, if someone in the group tries toget everyone else in the group to diss an outsider,encourage your child to remove him or herself at thattime or to stand up for the victim. Such bravery is eas-ier for some, but all kids can be taught to refrain fromthe kind of talk and behavior that puts others down,that essentially says, “We are better than you,” and isakin to prejudice.

Teach and model for your children life withoutprejudice…and let freedom ring.✲Gail Perry Johnston is the author of The Social Cause Diet: Find aService That Feeds Your Soul, available on Amazon and www.social-causediet.com. Johnston also authored The Wish & The Wonder: Wordsof Wisdom for Expectant Parents and coauthored A Rumor of Angels:Quotations for Living, Dying, & Letting Go. Visit www.gailperryjohn-ston.com for more info.



If you are like most moms, you want to behome with your children to comfort themwhen they are sick, or be there for their

special events. Many stay-at-home moms leftcareers to be home and care for their childrenfull time. But in this economy, so many familiesare now struggling to live on just one income;leaving most moms feeling helpless, unable tocontribute to their household income. SeveralSouth Jersey moms have found a solution tothis dilemma and are teaming up and earningserious incomes, on their own time.

Brenda Regalbuto of Vineland was intro-duced to a national health and wellness com-pany just over a year ago. Her friend, AdrienneRichardson (Editor and former owner of SouthJersey MOM) approached her with a home-based business she had started. It was with acompany that not only offered the healthier,non-toxic products that they wanted to usearound their children but an opportunity likeno other.

“As a homeschooling mother of five, I’ma busy mom. But when work was slow for myhusband who’s self-employed, I needed to earn

some extra income,” says Brenda. “Putting mychildren in daycare was not an option for myfamily. Finding something that I could do when-ever my schedule allowed was the key. Sowhen Adrienne approached me with a home-based business that allowed me to set my ownschedule, I jumped on board!”

Adrienne also had a very busy schedule.While raising two small children, she was run-ning South Jersey MOM magazine, working 60hours a week. “I saw this opportunity as a wayto have a second income. You never knowwhat the future holds and I liked the idea ofhaving a ‘back up plan.’ And since I could set myown schedule, this was perfect for my situa-tion. Once I did my research on the companyand tried the products, I knew I had to tellother moms about this!” says Adrienne. Theydecided to team up and help each other. Sixmonths later, they were both earning over$1,000 a month.

As Brenda and Adrienne began workingtogether, the local leaders in the business guid-ed them every step of the way. They helpedtrain them and armed them with the toolsneeded for success. “If you live in South Jersey,you really have an advantage in this business.The top executives within the company liveright here in the local area and help anyonewho wants to become successful,” saysAdrienne.

This health and wellness company makesmore than 400 all-natural products that aresafe for your family and the environment.Families who have children with special needscan especially benefit from these products as itallows them to remove the toxins in thehomes. This is very important for children withautism, ADD and those with allergies.

The company also makes gluten-free foodand vitamins as well as healthy snacks anddietary supplements. “All of the products aresafe for you, your children, and they even have

natural dog snacks, vitamins and shampoo,”Adrienne says. “My family and friends all lovethe environmentally-friendly products.”

All of the products are made in the USAand cost less than grocery store prices, as theyare concentrated and last longer. The companyships the products right to your front door. “Idon’t have to take orders or deliver products.Customers place the orders themselves onlineor over the phone and the company shipstheir order directly to their house,” saysBrenda. “I don’t even have to collect their pay-ment. I just enroll the customer and the com-pany handles everything after that!”

Many other home-based businessesrequire you to collect money, deliver ordersand to keep on holding parties. “The best partabout this business is that you are helping peo-ple get healthy all while saving money. I feelgood about supporting an American companyand helping other moms contribute financiallyto their family,” says Adrienne.

If you would like to learn more abouthow you can earn supplemental or careerlevel income, call Adrienne today at (856) 305-3490. (There is a one-time enrollment fee of $29and you can cancel at any time, without hassle.)✲�

Local Moms Earn EXTRA INCOME with Home-Based Business

Adrienne Richardson and family. Photo by Lisa WardPhotography.

Brenda Regalbuto and family. Photo by VioletBrownPhotography.


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For a complete list of events, log ontowww.southjerseymom.comFebruary Calendar

ATLANTIC COUNTYSleepover at the LibraryFebruary 3 at 7 p.m.Wear your pajamas. Bring a stuffedanimal and tuck him in for a sleepover at the library. Please pickup your animals by Noon, FridayFebruary 4 and ask them abouttheir night at the library! Suggestedfor ages 3 1/2 to 5. Registrationrequired. Atlantic County LibrarySystem / Hammonton Branch. (609) 561-2264.

BURLINGTON COUNTYParenting Classes Throughout February The following parenting classes willbe offered at Ashland Church inVoorhees. Classes are offered at9:30am and 5pm. 2/6: Every Child isDifferent: Parenting Your UniqueChild; 2/13: Anxiety in Children;2/20: Effective Discipline; 2/27:Building Good Character in Kids.Childcare provided. Call Janine at (856) 429-8844 or visit www.ashlandchurch.org for info.

CAMDEN COUNTYValentines Around the WorldFebruary 12 &13 from 12 to 3 p.m.The language of love is universal!Make a Valentine for a loved oneand some special treats for yourself,all with a multicultural twist. $10.95for adults and children 12 months

and over. Garden State DiscoveryMuseum, 2040 Springdale Rd,Cherry Hill. (856) 424-1233,www.discoverymuseum.com.

CUMBERLAND COUNTYGodspell JuniorFebruary 4, 5, 6A groundbreaking and uniquereflection on the life of Jesus, with amessage of kindness, tolerance andlove. In this production, Jesusarrives to help mold the otheractors on stage into adults throughlessons played out with games andmusic. 7:30 p.m. and 3 p.m. SundayMatinee. $13/person. LandisTheatre, 830 E Landis Ave,Vineland. www.landistheatre.comor (856) 691-1121.

Valentine’s Day Family NightFebruary 8 from 6 to 7 p.m.Bring the family to the library toenjoy Valentine’s Day-themed storytelling and crafts. Age 12and under. Registration required.Vineland Public Library, Landis Ave. (856) 794-4244,www.vinelandlibrary.org.

Love is in the AirFebruary 11 & 12 at 7 to 9:30 p.m.George Perez singing classic stan-dards and oldies by Sinatra, Dino,Darin, Nat King Cole, Bennett, Elvisand others. Original Art Exhibit, triv-ia contest, food and wine available.Crepe Maker Cafe @ The Back Room Lounge, 607 East Landis Ave,Vineland. Tickets $15/person. (856) 205-0027.

GLOUCESTER COUNTYCharlotte’s WebFebruary 18 & 19Live Children’s Theatre. BroadwayTheatre of Pitman. $9/person. Visitwww.thebroadwaytheatre.org orcall (856) 384-8381 for times andtickets.

"When the Child Cries"February 4 & 5Special performance in recognitionof Black History Month. When theChild Cries is an electrifying andspiritual account of a woman andher child and their struggle to sur-vive in a city that is too large andtoo cruel for a naive young woman.This nationally recognized produc-tion is a statement of social struggleand the determination to keeppushing forward, to not lose sight ofone's dreams, and to become a pos-itive force in society. $25/person.Rowan University, Pfleeger Concert

Hall, Glassboro. Call forshow times and tickets.(856) 256-4448.

SALEM COUNTYThe Path to Freedom: BlackFamilies of New JerseyFebruary 5 from 3 to 4:30 p.m.Walter Greason from UrsinusUniversity will discuss and sign hisrecently released book Path toFreedom: Black Families of NewJersey. Liberty and equalityrequired the sacrifices of manyAfrican Americans who lived andmade a difference in New Jersey,including the Russell, Ham, andBrown families who appear in thisbook. This contemporary narrativeof community uplift offers a freshappreciation of just how long thepath to freedom is. Friends Village,1 Friends Dr, Woodstown. Call JimSchulte at (856) 769-2708 for moreinfo.Click, Clack, MooFebruary 12 at 2 p.m.Farmer Brown’s cows find out howto use his granddaughter’s laptopand soon are protesting their workconditions. $8 and $10/person.Appel Farm Arts & Music Center, 457Shirley Rd, Elmer. (856) 358-2472.

things 2 do

To submit your event, send an email to [email protected]. Entries are due six weeks prior to the event and are filled on a first come first serve basis. Space is limited.

To purchase your subscription via mail, cut out the form and mail with payment to:

Superior GraphicsP.O. Box 2413, Vineland, NJ 08362

or purchase online at www.southjerseymom.com

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FOR THE HOMEDO YOU NEED AN ELECTRICIAN OR HANDYMAN IN YOURHOME?Experienced electrician can install new lights, ceiling fans, lightdimmers, receptacles and do service upgrades and additions, as well as any other electrical needs. Also offering generalhandyman help with fixing just about anything around yourhouse that needs fixing! Call Eric at (856) 305-9809.

CAN'T GET THE TOYS, LAUNDRY AND OTHER KID STUFFUNDER CONTROL?If you're feeling overwhelmed by all the “stuff” consuming yourhouse, let BB’s Clutter Solutions reduce your stress, create order

and help you find a place for everything...for good. Contact BarbaraBerman at (856) 912-0077 or www.bb-clutter-solutions.com and getyour house back today!

GIFT IDEASGREAT PERSONALIZED GIFTS FOR ALL AGES At JUST FOR LITTLE PEOPLE (and others, too!) we specialize in new babygifts both hand-painted or embroidered. Beautifully wrapped and avail-able for pick-up at our new Gibbsboro location, or we can ship it foryou. Call (856) 627-8901 or check out www.justforlittlepeople.com.

HEALTH & WELLNESSARE YOU READY TO TURN OVER A NEW LEAF?Want to improve your eating habits, increase your energy and understand your food cravings? Turning Leaf Nutrition and Wellness will develop a personalized program that will radically improve yourhealth and happiness. One conversation can change your life. (856)912-3709, www.turningleaf-wellness.com,[email protected].

PARTIESABRAKADOODLE ARTY PARTIES! CelebrateCREATIVITY! CUSTOMIZED Arty Parties perfect for BIRTH-DAYS, SCHOOL OR SCOUT EVENTS. Children'sartwork is FRAMED - the ultimate UNIQUE PARTYexperience! Hosted at your location; we providean ARTrageous teacher, materials & colorful FUNfor ages 2-12. Visit www.abrakadoodle.com/nj01 or call (856) 914-0521.

PEDIATRIC OCCUPATIONALTHERAPY NEED HELP GUIDING YOUR CHILD’S DEVELOPMENTAL JOURNEY? At The Schlinic, happy childhoods are our specialty. Kids come for awesome motorequipment, fun sensory experiences anddevelopmental play. Parents come foranswers, professionals who listen, assess-ments and research-supported intervention.Learn more at www.schlinic.com or call Dr. Jodi at (856) 692-9292.

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february 2011 - south jersey mom magazine

Documents

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color ami

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