essay parenting 1

8/11/2019 Essay Parenting 1

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According to Oxford Dictionary, a child means a young human being below the age of

puberty or below the legal age of majority. I think this is so obvious that a parent, we are the

strongest influence for them. They will be influenced by what they see, heard and by experience.

There is one a wise saying by David Bly, Your children will become what you are; so be what

you want them to be." So this saying is a prove that we are, a parent, is the core ingredients in

our child's life. There is no doubt about it. Parent mould their kids since young, so it is up to

them to make something or nothing out of their children. I am sure you hear this a lot but

children are the reflection of their parent, so it is clearly their responsibilities to shape the out

coming of their kids. During this millennium surrounding, I know that we are packed with the a

variety types of toys, games, internet and all the new gadgets of electronic. More or else, the

devices might be the close influence to them. But do not we forget, parents! We are the greatest

influence of all because we raise them. We actually brought them up in this very world andalways know what they want ever since. Most of the parents out there think that peers are the

main cause of their problematic kids. But do not point your finger to them yet because parents

are the one to blame. Trust me. It all starts at home. Parents with good characters can use these

influences to shape the personality of their kids. Here, I had a few tips on how to become good

parent. Me, myself had been used these tips to my own kids, and believe it or not, it works!

Step number one is being a good role model. As parent, we have to have good

personalities if we wants our kids to enclose that qualities too. We all know that children are the

reflections of their parents. So no wonder if we see a kid who presenting a problem, comes from

a broken and problematic family. In addition, parents must model the appropriate behavior for

their children if they want their children to be successful in their behavior. For instance, smoking

issues among school kids. I strongly believe that besides the peer influence, parents are also the

one who hold the responsible. They had been exposed to cigarettes from small age. As the

curiosity grows up, they want to experience it since parents never explain how dangerous it will

do to your lungs. Furthermore, they just do not care at all. As a parent, it is important for you to

show the good qualities that can enhance the child's behavior. If you set high standards for

yourself and treat others with kindness and respect, your child stands a better chance of

following your examples. Try to practice what you preach. Teenagers can and do notice when

you dont!


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guidelines so they will not be lost along the way. Or in other way, you can just put up a schedule

for them. It will be easier for them to complete their responsibility. For instance, parents divide

the job to each of your kids during dinner or lunch time. Assigned the kids to do different chores

at one time. Who will do the dishes, who will help you with the cooking and who will clean the

table. There are many examples that you can use to teach responsibilities. Examples, completing

homework assignments without being nagged, taking on community activities or admitting to

both the good and bad choices that they make. Other technique that you can do is incentive

method. As for younger children you can use Mother s rule. Say, When you have picked up

all your clothes, you may go out and play. Be sure to use when rather than if. This rule will

surely help a lot! Burke states, Praise is powerful. Praising your child is one of the most

important things you can do as a parent. Praise is nourishment. It helps your child grow

emotionally, just as food helps your child grow physically (Burke, 1997, pg. 51). Praise is amethod of keeping focus on the positive of any situation. You give them extra token or prize or it

can be amount of money, if they can do any of the chores without being asked or they just

succeed. For young kids, I believe that this will motivates them to fulfill their responsibility.

They already aimed what they will get if they do the work right or able to finish the chores in

time. The reason behind giving praise is to build up self esteem, to give a belief of personal

satisfaction, with the addition of feeling secure within one self (Hurlock, 1978, pg. 311).

Indirectly, they learn how to be responsible.

The fourth step is make quality time daily to spend with your kids. Life can be hectic

at one point when you, parents, have no time to spend with your kids. All you do is working

from day to night. You went home with fatigue face and bunch of working problems on the top

of your head. You get crazy when your kids start screaming and running around the dinner table,

messing up with the food, disturbing their younger siblings and you cannot bare the noise. When

you reach your boiling point, you will start screaming back and sometimes all the inappropriate

words just running out from your mouth. This is where your brain cannot think rationally

because your body is too weak. Without you realize, the kids just have more unpleasant feeling

to be around you. Life has a way of overriding all of your time. You just have to grab a few

minutes to spend with your kids. If you cannot find the time, then make the time. Take a family

vacation. Go somewhere far. Far from the chaotic life in town. Ease your mind. Be around the

kids and learn more about them. You, yourself will have a incredible time to relax your mind.


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Forget all the problems and enjoy the time with your kids. No matter how busy you are, or how

tired you may be, there is no reason to deny your time with your children. You can just observe

them and taka a chance to get closer to them. It does not necessarily to be a big family vacation.

it can be a thirty minutes time at home or bring them to playground. As for teenagers, spend the

time to have a private conversation. Playing outside with your children is a simple act that can

have major benefits. For the more adventurous, a fishing trip, a hike in the jungle, rock climbing

might be more appealing. You will not realize how it means to them. Some are just act like they

just do not care but deep inside, they really appreciate it so much.

The next step is be your childs first source of information . Be the internet to your

child. We have to encourage them to ask questions and explore the world. We as parents, have to

get ready to be their source of information. During the questions and answering session with

your child, you can create a positive atmosphere. Furthermore, we have create a mutual trust andgain respect. Through this personality, parents just made the parenting go effortless. Children

adapt from the relationship and they build up the good deeds in them. this also can prevent the

kids from developing unsafe habits or taking unnecessary risks in their coming life journey.

The next step is important. which is do not argue with your spouse in front of the

children. Every problems that you and your partner face are depends on the way you approach

and handle it. Believe it or not, it might be a good thing for your children to see you and your

spouse having an argument and see how you manage the situation in a respectful and healthy

way. but it will always turn out to be a fight, cursing each other, and the things will get out of

control. Then, it will be the worst thing that your children could ever seen. When something

becomes a big enough issue that an argument is unavoidable, be aware that the children are

watching and find a way to sum it up and discuss it in private, means with their close ones.

Mostly, children who are been exposed to this kind of situation will have conflicts to manage

their disagreements. They will find it hard to make a decision in life. They will choose an

aggressive way to solve their problems. The disagreements will definitely arise in their lives and

also in their relationship. In my humble opinion, I think, if Mother and Father can learn how to

handle the situation and majoring the methods of problem solving, the kids will automatically

can turn out to be as what you want. This will benefit the family in the long run.


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In a nutshell, parents have to realized that in these modern age, sometimes our kids are no

longer guided by their parents but they are guided by the media. We as the elders have to know

that this is no good news. Most of the things showed on the media are negative things that can

corrupt our kids mind.

Believe it or not, the media have a very strong influence on kids as much as parents or

their close friends. In addition, the lack of communication between parents and their children

could bring a bad effect to their future. At a very young age, parents should know that children

do not understand how this world works. How the mother have to juggle at work place and

continue the next cycle at home. How dad have to work for long hours to put some food on the

dinner table. Kids will assume that you have no time for them when you only want the best for

them, but this is normal since they are still blinded by the perfect life showed by the media. How

drugs would take the loneliness away, how sex before marriage could boost their self esteemespecially through songs that are playing on the radio.

As for them, parents are the last person that could understand themselves. Parents are no

longer seen as role models but outsiders. They look up to singers, or rock stars as their idols.

Following their every foot step including clothing and behavior. This can be good if those

famous people actually are such a good example. But if the image portrayed by them are

manipulative and rerouting the kids from the straight path to a winding one that could lead them

to a life with no future this could be really bad, not only for them but to all humanity. If our

future leaders are too busy rebelling over small things, how can we expect for them to lead a

country. This is when education not only on academics, but real education.

The reality of this world should be exposed to them at an early age. We should let them

differentiate between reality and work of fiction. That is why it is better to have a friendly

relationship with kids, especially when they are teens. That is the most crucial stage because

then, curiosity starts to take over. Teenagers want to try almost everything not bounded by the

consequences, their care free spirit could be dangerous but we should let them experience it

themselves for them to learn the cause and effect. Keeping them in the house will do them any

good, strict parenting are good for sometime but all the time can affect your child. It caused by

all the hormones, kids will be much cunning on finding out a way to sneak out the house. Like I

said at the very beginning, it is very important to create trust between parents and their children.

essay parenting 1

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