SENDING THE WRONG MESSAGE

Writing the Right Words the Wrong Way and Why It Matters

By Michael K. Bender

Walk into any fifth-grade English class and you are likely to hear kids asking when they will ever need to know this, but the truth is that writing skills play a larger part in your professional life than you may realize. Good writing skills can help you come across as more credible, more capable, than a colleague who frequently has typos and grammatical errors...Writing enriches the nations political life as well. In fact: Better writers tend to get higher grades and be perceived as more competent and more intelligent than their less literary counterparts. Renee O'FarrellAt its best, writing has helped transform the world. Revolutions have been started by it. Oppression has been toppled by it. And it have enlight-ened the human condition. American life has been richer because people like Rachel Carson, Cesar Chavez, Thomas Jefferson, and Martin Luther King, Jr., have given voice to the aspirations of the nation and its people. ..When pressed, many of us, young and old alike, still turn to pen and ink in the effort to make sense of our grief, pleasure, rage, or happiness... Few national leaders have matched the power and persuasiveness of Abraham Lincoln or Franklin D. Roosevelt as they called out to be better angels of the American nature. All of these leaders and others have used the power of words, language, and writing to remind Americans of what high stan-dards they have set for themselves - and what these ideals mean to the rest of the world. [1] U.S. Department of Education, Institute of Education Sciences, National Center for Education Statistics, National Assessment of Educational Progress (NAEP), 2011 Writing As-sessment

THE SHOCKING TRUTH[1]

In 2011, only 3 percent of 12th grade students demonstrated advanced writing skills.

In 2011, only 24 percent of 12th grade students demonstrated proficient writing skills.

73% of 12th grade students demonstrated basic or below basic writing skills.

Students who write four or five pages a week for English/language arts homework score higher than those who write fewer pages.

[1] U.S. Department of Education, Institute of Education Sciences, National Center for Education Statistics, National Assessment of Educational Progress (NAEP), 2011 Writing Assessment

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THERE IS NO WRITING IN MY FUTURE

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Reading/Writing SeriesLesson 2

Michael K. Bender

The following is an excerpt from: Why Can't They Speak and Write Clearly? Employers notice that college leaves many graduates ill equipped for work by George Leef, December 11, 2013Suppose you sent your daughter to a music camp an expensive camp lasting months. She had said that she wanted to learn the violin, so you bought a nice one and sent her off to camp.Upon her return, you ask how the camp was and she replies, Great! We studied lots of stuff about music and the violin. Then you ask her to play something.Well, we didnt play much and I still dont know how to tune my instrument. But it was still a terrific experience.You would probably think that a music camp ought to concen-trate on essentials first tuning, scales, simple pieces before

Writing is more than putting words on paper. It's a final stage in the complex process of communicating that begins with thinking. Writing is an especially important stage in communication, the intent being to leave no room for doubt. Has any country ratified a verbal treaty?

Job-Related. Professional and white-collar workers write frequently--preparing memos, letters, briefing papers, sales reports, articles, research reports, proposals, and the like. Most workers do "some" writing on the job.

Practical. Most of us make lists, jot down reminders, and write notes and instructions at least occasionally.

Stimulating. Writing helps to provoke thoughts and to organize them logically and concisely.

Social. Most of us write thank-you notes and letters to friends at least now and then.

Therapeutic.. It can be helpful to express feelings in writing that cannot be expressed so easily by speaking. [1]

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I WANT TO BE RICH, NOT A WRITER

moving on to music theory, music history, the need for more diversity in opera companies and so on.For many American students, college is like that music camp. They take lots of courses and study (or at least seem to) lots of stuff, but dont even learn how to use the English language well. You might think that would be a top priority, but actu-ally its not a priority at all.A recent article, Why Johnny Cant Write, and Why Employ-ers are Mad, puts a spotlight on this remarkable omission. Companies are trying to fill many job openings but find that hard, even with lots of un- and under-employed college graduates looking for work. Often, writes author Kelley Holland, the mismatch results from applicants inadequate communication skills. In survey after survey, employers are complaining about job candidates inability to speak and write clearly.In his 2011 book In the Basement of the Ivory Tower, the author (who chose to remain anonymous, calling himself Professor X) observes that good writers have read a lot of quality writing over many years, but unfortunately few high school graduates have read much. Thus, they enter college with very poorly developed writing skills. While anyone can hire editors to improve their writing, and some may try copying others works, eventually you will be on your own and competing with those who learned excel-lent writing skills. Your writing skills will help you get through and make the best of college, influence your career in terms of income, investment in your ideas, and establish respect for

your authority and position in organizations. Good writing is not something we fall back on; it is something we rely on.

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I ate mom he said.

Is this a line from a ghoulish story? Or simply a grammatical error that leads the reader to the wrong conclusion?

Scene 1: Enter punctuation!

I ate, mom, he said. Do you get the picture?

I had steak fries and string beans for dinner. So is he a vegetarian? Hard to tell from the sentence.

Scene 2: I had steak, fries and string beans for dinner. Look at the picture! Without the picture, all you need is a comma.

WHO NEEDS A PICTURE WHEN JUST A COMMA

WILL DO?

Punctuation

Steak with truffle butter and steak fries.

Ok, so my punctuation is correct, so what else do I need to worry about? Sometimes we forget that the reader is reading your words, not your mind. As a consequence, you need enough information and a style that is not only understandable but easy to read. Style means how you put together your thoughts, sentences and paragraphs. So lets try an example:Uniforms are not good for people. They are unhappy and ugly. Its awesome not to wear them so why demand we change our clothes? I know that my parents wore uniforms when they were in school but I think think they turned out okay but maybe they could have turned out better if they had a chance not to wear when they were required to wear them because it may or may not change anything? Sometimes I think the whole idea of uniforms is wrong but in other cases it is ok. I dont think me parents were made better by uniforms worn by them. I hope I have articulated my thoughts and beliefs in this most auspicious occasion to persuade you.

DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS

Style

Just a few issues...

Uniforms are not good for people. They are unhappy and ugly. Its awesome not to wear them so why demand we change our clothes? I know that my parents wore uniforms when they were in school but I think think they turned out okay but maybe they could have turned out better if they had a chance not to wear when they were required to wear them because it may or may not change anything? Sometimes I think the whole idea of uniforms is wrong but in other cases it is ok. I dont think me parents were made better by uni-forms worn by them. I hope I have articulated my thoughts and beliefs in this most auspicious occasion to persuade you.

Do we have any idea of when and where uniforms are appropriate? Students, McDonalds, the Dallas Cowboys? Who is unhappy and ugly? People or uniforms?Awesome may be fine for your peers but would you use it in an academic essay?Do you see a long, rambling sentence here?In what other cases are uniforms ok?Can you find the passive sentence in the paragraph? Do the words articulated and auspicious sound like you?If this was a persuasive letter to your principal, would he or she be persuaded?Now it is your chance. Write a five paragraph essay persuad-ing your parents to buy you a car for your sixteenth birthday.

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