why do teens act the way they do

8/12/2019 Why Do Teens Act the Way They Do

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WHY DO TEENS ACT THE WAY THEY DO?(4)

Our youth now love luxury .

They have bad manners andcont empt fo r au thor i t y .They show disrespect f or t hei r elders.

They love chat t er in pla ce of exer c ise.

They no longer r i se when elders ent er t he room; t hey cont ra dict t hei r p ar ent s,

chat t er before company; gobble up the i r food;

and ty r annize the i r t eachers .

Socr at es, Fif t h Centur y, B.C. Adolescence begins at puberty and endssometime.

Adolescence is not childhood, and it is not adulthood. It is the periodin between these two stages of life. Adolescence is when the brain isundergoing its final stage of development. Currently it starts around11 or 12 years of age and lasts about 15 years. Adolescent behavior isdirectly linked to big changes happening in the brain. Understanding

the biological challenges of adolescence can help parents interact withtheir adolescent without taking things personally. Knowledge aboutthe adolescent brain can help a parent remain calm in the midst of anadolescent melt down. Parents need to understand what is happeningin the brain of their adolescent so they can provide the nurture andguidance necessary to help their teen thrive, and survive this stage ofdevelopment.


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The adolescent brain is still under construction.

These images of the brain show just how much the brain changesfrom age 12 to age 20. Parents and teachers are often confused by alot of adolescent behavior. Understanding the specific parts of thebrain that develop during human adolescence explains a lot of

adolescent behavior. Each part of the brain has a different job.When a specific part of the brain is still under construction, itdoesnt work the same way as it does in a mature, adult brain.

The PRE-FRONTAL CORTEX is the executive center of the brain.Its job is to think ahead about consequences and to plan. In an adultbrain, the pre-frontal cortex helps control impulses coming fromother parts of the brain. But, the adolescent brain seeks thrills andadventure. This thrill-seeking behavior is explained by the hormonesthat surge through the adolescent brain. During adolescence thepre-frontal cortex goes through stages of pruning and then, themature circuits are finally formed. New MRI studies clearly show thatthe physical development of the pre-frontal cortex is not completeuntil the mid-twenties.


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Bot t oml ine: Adolescent s do not have t he abi l i t y t o cont r o l impulses

and under st and cause and ef f ect in t he same way t hat is possib le in a

mature adul t bra in .

Adolescent brains get the gas before the brakes. Puberty gives

adolescents a body that looks like an adult and a brain that goesthrough wild emotional swings and powerful surges. Even auto rentalcompanies do not rent to drivers under 25 years of age.

Their brains gas pedal is ready for aNASCAR-paced adulthood.

But because theirpre-frontal cortex isnot yet fully developed,adolescent brains have the brakes of a Model T.

Parents must be the mature, substitute, pre-frontal cortex fortheir developing adolescent. Clearly stated rules and parentaldiscipline will help keep an adolescents behavior from becomingdestructive to the family, themselves, and others.

The basic message of recent groundbreaking neuroscience is thatcognitive maturity develops last (after physical and mental maturity)for all adolescents. This research shows that cognitive maturityhappens in the mid-twenties, and includes the following abilities:

Mature judgment Seeing into the future Seeing how their behavior can effect their future Associating cause and effect Moral intelligence Abstract thinking Seeing what is not obvious Planning and decision-making Rational behavior and decision-making Understanding rules of social conduct


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Adolescent brains interpret emotions differently than adult brains

Parents often find themselves in the middle of a misunderstanding withtheir teen and have no idea how they got there. It may be they arefighting with their adolescents developing brain. Brain scans show that

adults and adolescents use different parts of the brain to interpretfacial expressions. Adults use the pre-frontal cortex, but adolescentsuse the AMYGDALA. The amygdala is the seat of fear and anger, or thefight-flight response, in the brain. Adults use the rational part of thebrain to read emotions, but adolescents basically do it with a gutreaction. For example, brain research shows that adolescents see

anger when shown a picture of a face showing anexpression of fear or surprise or sadness or worry.

Misreading emotional cues can lead to real communication problems.misint erpr et at ion+gut r esponse+lousy brakes=communicat ion pr oblem

When a seemingly normal conversation with an adolescent suddenlyspins out of control, its not the result of having a bad attitude ortrying to be difficult.

The adolescent may really be interpretingthe outside world, especially emotionalmessages, differently.

Heres how it happens:Adolescents overreact because their brain

mis-interprets a comment as a threat or an insult

.

The adolescents emotionalresponse pushes the adultsbutton (parent, teacher, etc.)who also becomes upset.


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The adults emotional response, in turn, causes theteen brain to misinterpret

the situation even more.

Very quickly a comment or conversation canturn into a situation that spirals out of controland leads to hurtful words and hurt feelings.

Parents will often find themselves asking,What just happened?

When a child lies to a parent, the situationcan also quickly spiral out of control if aparent reacts with anger.Its the job of the adult to keep their cool,because its a lot harder for an adolescent brain to be reasonable.Adults can use their fully functioning pre-frontal cortex to remaincalm and rational during these communication situations which canerupt into big misunderstandings. It is very important that adultsclearly spell out their feelings to help the adolescent understand thecorrect interpretation of what the adult is saying.

Example: I m angry because you were lat e f or cur f ew. I am

disappointed you didn t cal l me and let me know what was going on.I was worr ied t hat somet hing bad had happened t o you.

Recent brai n research suggest s t hat t he abi l i t y t o accurat e ly

int erpr et t one of voice, body language, f ac ia l expr essions, and

socia l cues in ot hers may be t he f i nal st age of t he brain s

development .


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Changes in the adolescent brain explain Tired TeensAt puberty two big changes affect sleep patterns. First, the way thebrain regulates sleep and the amount of sleep needed begin tochange at puberty. Second, the timing of the sleep/wake cycle

shifts.

How much sleep do teens need? Sleep research has discovered thatthe adolescent brain needs about nine and a half hours

of sleep everynight. Most adolescents are not getting anywhere near enough sleep.

The result is a nation of sleep-deprived teens.They dont get enough sleep during the week.Many adolescents sleep more on the weekendbecause they are so tired, which throws their

sleep-wake cycle even further out of whack.

Beginning at puberty thesleeping and waking cycleschange. The chemical in

the brain that helps a person fall asleep is releasedlater and later in the adolescent brain. And thelevel of that same chemical drops off later andlater. So adolescents have two sleep problems.Because their brains are in the midst of so muchdevelopment, they continue to need a lot of sleep about 9 hours every night for their brain tooperate at its peak efficiency during the wakinghours. The other problem for teens is that becauseof the shift in their sleep/wake cycle they get tiredlater and go to bed later. But, to get to school ontime, they have to get up early and be in school,before their brain is really awake or fully rested.

Teenagers are often accused of being lazy and irresponsible whenthey forget their assignments, books, or chores. The reality is thatthey are fighting a losing battle with their own bodies to stay awake.Sleep deprivation is a serious problem. It can cause a lot of d i f f i cu l t y

w i t h memoryand lack of al er t ness. Lack of sleepinterferes with a teenagers ability to use theirfunctioning memory to get through the day.


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If teenage driversgot enough sleep,

imagine how manydriving accidentswouldnt happen.Payi ng at t ent ion

requir es a brai n

t hat i s rest ed and

ab le t o st ay a ler t .

Mood disorders go along with chronic sleep deprivation. Emotionsare more intense, and all ages of people are less able to controlemotional outbursts, when they dont get enough sleep.

Some sudden tears,slamming doors,withdrawal, or

angry outburstsmay be signs ofsleep deprivation.

Parents need to help their adolescentunderstand the importance of gettingenough sleep. These simple steps can helpconvince the adolescent brain its time to goto bed and fall asleep.

After 9 PM:no caffeinated or high sugar beverageslimit time watching TVlimit time playing video gameslimit physical activitieslimited or no phone calls


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Teens live in a complex psychological and social world.

1. Rapi d phy si cal changes, such as grow t h spur t s, v oi ce changes,At least four dramatic changes take place during adolescence.

hair growt h, sk in pr oblems, t he development of sexual organs,and breast development in gir l s.

Adolescents spend a lot of time every day thinking about theirphysical features. They are very self-conscious about how they look.They often become preoccupied or embarrassed about some oftheir new physical changes. While completely natural, adolescentpreoccupation with physical appearance can make life very difficultfor some young people (pimples, weight gain, entering puberty earlyor late, or anything else they think makes them appear unattractive

or different from their peers).

At this stage of adolescentdevelopment, any negativeattention that turns into someform of public humiliation, or

bullying, because of an adolescents physicalcharacteristics, can be extremely painfulemotionally. When bullying occurs at schooladolescents do not feel safe and will oftenrefuse to attend classes. If this happens,parents, school personnel, and other adultsneed to intervene.

Cyberspace bullying is equally alarming. There have been too manyrecent examples of adolescent violence and suicide to ignore theimpact bullying can have on an emotionally fragile teenager.


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2. Changes in t he int ensi t y , st abi l i t y and expl osiveness of t heiremot ions

Because of changes in the adolescent

brain, teens experience new emotions.These emotions are feltvery intensely.

sexual feelings

feelings of jealousy

feelings of territoriality

Familiar feelings like anger and sadness arenow experienced more strongly than everbefore. Adolescents can experience a hugerange of feelings - very mixed and verydifferent - all within a very short period oftime. These emotional roller coasterrides can be very confusing.


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An adolescent can be on top of the world at 9 AM,in the dumps by 9:30, flying high again at 10 AM, and feel liketheyre drowning by 10:30.

Who did or did not say Hi to them in betweenclasses, in the school hallways, may be the causeof a sudden mood change.

It is very important for adults to remember that these sudden

changes in emotions and emotional fireworks are largely explainedby the changes happening within the adolescent brain.

To make matters worse, adolescents cant decide if they want

all the privileges of an adult

OR

fun with no bigresponsibilities

OR


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childhood care-free fun

OR

the safety and comfort of a parents hug

Back and forth they go between feeling and acting maturely andimmaturely. Parents, teachers, and other adults arent quite surewho or what mood theyll be dealing with either. If adultsremain calm and respectful when dealing with an adolescent, it goesa long way in reducing the emotional explosions.

Knowing the limitations of the adolescent brain does not excuse badbehavior. It does, however, reinforce the need for parents toprovide constant support and guidance. More than ever, adolescentsneed their parents to remain involved in their lives. Its not buttingin, but pouring in love and guidance to protect an adolescents futurehopes, health, and happiness.

It is not always easy for parents to figure out when and how to stayconnected, when the influence of peers increasesin the lives of teens. Sometimes parents assume

incorrectly that peers will have a greater influenceon their young person than is actually the case. Anational study found that teens reported theirparents were the most important influence on thedecisions they made regarding sexual behavior.

http://www.teenpregnancy.org/about/announcements/pdf/wov2004pressrelease.pdf
http://www.teenpregnancy.org/about/announcements/pdf/wov2004pressrelease.pdfhttp://www.teenpregnancy.org/about/announcements/pdf/wov2004pressrelease.pdfhttp://www.teenpregnancy.org/about/announcements/pdf/wov2004pressrelease.pdf


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3. The shi f t of i nf l uence f r om parent s t o peers

Teenagers often dont want to go places or do many things with theirparents. They feel like a kid around their parents. When theythink their parent does or says something stupid, they are totallyembarrassed to be seen with that parent.

When children are little, parents decide just about everything fortheir child. So, its not surprising that as teens leave childhood, theyneed to put some distance between themselves and their parents.Part of growing up i sstarting to make some of ones own decisions.Pulling away from parents even refusing to do what they want isthe way teens can begin to exercise their own judgment.

At the same time adolescents voice their desire for moreindependence from parents, they often feel tremendous pressure tofit in. Peers have rules for how to dress, how to talk, what music to

listen to, and how to act. Peer pressure can be a powerful force on ateens decision-making. Adolescents experience the pressure oftheir peers throughout their day. The strength of peer pressuremust be balanced with strong and constant parental support andguidance.

Without judging their teens friends, parentsneed to talk with their adolescents about peerpressure and how to manage it.Parents need to encourage their

adolescent to make independentdecisions. When adolescents thinkindependently, they may also startto challenge a parents values.

Challenging simply means adolescents are starting tothink for themselves. It doesnt mean they are goingto reject everything their parents think is important.


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4. The search for i dent i t y t hey need t o answer t wo quest ions:

Who am I ?

What do I want t o do wi t h my l i f e?

4

This ar t ic le is based on the work of David Walsh,

aut hor o f WHY DO THEY ACT T HAT WAY? A Sur vi va l

Guide to the Adolescent Brain for You and Your

Teen. Informat ion used in t h is ar t ic le inc ludes

edi ted excerpts and the words of the author .

Dr. Walsh has over 30 years of exper ience with

t eens as a t eacher, spor t s coach, school counselor ,

and pr i va t e t herap is t . Ot her impor t ant t op ics

covered in t his book di scuss t he issues of Love, Sex

and t he Adolescent Br ai n, and Adolescent s and

t he Media. Very par ent - f r iendly inf ormat ion. WHY DO THEY ACT

THAT WAY? is avai l able at y our l ocal publ ic l ibr ary or can be

ordered at www.Amazon.com. Vis i t Dr . Walsh s websi t e at

www.med ia fam i l y . o rgfor more i n format ion parent s need to know.
http://www.amazon.com/http://www.amazon.com/http://www.mediafamily.org/http://www.mediafamily.org/http://www.mediafamily.org/http://www.amazon.com/

why do teens act the way they do

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