the impostures of scapin

8/10/2019 The Impostures of Scapin

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The Impostures of Scapin

byMoliere (Poquelin)

Produced by Delphine Lettau

THE IMPST!"ES # S$%PI&'

(LES #!"E"IES DE S$%PI&')

MLIE"E

T"%&SL%TED I&T E&*LISH P"SE'

+,ITH SH"T I&T"D!$TI&S %&D E-PL%&%T" &TES+

$H%"LES HE"& ,%LL

%cted on May ./0 12310 at the Palais "oyal0 4Les #ourberies de

Scapin4 had 5reat success' It is nothin50 ho6e7er0 but a farce0 ta8en

partly from classical0 partly from Italian or from #rench sources'

Moliere acted the part of Scapin'

PE"S&S "EP"ESE&TED'

%"*%&TE0 +father to+ $T%9E +and+ :E"I&ETTE'

*E"&TE0 +father to+ LE%&D"E +and+ H%$I&TH%'

$T%9E0 +son to+ %"*%&TE0 +and lo7er to+ H%$I&TH%'

LE%&D"E0 +son to+ *E"&TE0 +and lo7er+ to :E"I&ETTE'

:E"I&ETTE0 +dau5hter to+ %"*%&TE0 +belie7ed to be a 5ypsy

5irl+'

H%$I&TH%0 +dau5hter to+ *E"&TE'

S$%PI&0 +ser7ant to+ LE%&D"E'

SIL9EST"E0 +ser7ant to+ $T%9E'

&E"I&E0 +nurse to+ H%$I&TH%'

$%"LE'

T, P"TE"S'

+The scene is at+ &%PLES'

THE IMPST!"ES # S$%PI&'

%$T I'

S$E&E I';;$T%9E0 SIL9EST"E'

$T' %h< 6hat sad ne6s for one in lo7e< ,hat a hard fate to be

reduced to< So0 Sil7estre0 you ha7e =ust heard at the harbour that myfather is comin5 bac8>

SIL' es'

$T' That he returns this 7ery mornin5>

SIL' This 7ery mornin5'

$T' ,ith the intention of marryin5 me>

SIL' f marryin5 you'

$T' To a dau5hter of Mr' *eronte>

SIL' f Mr' *eronte'

$T' %nd that this dau5hter is on her 6ay from Tarentum for that purpose>

SIL' #or that purpose'

$T' %nd you ha7e this ne6s from my uncle>

SIL' #rom your uncle'

$T' To 6hom my father has 5i7en all these particulars in a letter>

SIL' In a letter'

$T' %nd this uncle0 you say0 8no6s all about our doin5s>

SIL' %ll our doin5s'

$T' h< spea80 I pray you? don4t 5o on in such a 6ay as that0 and

force me to 6rench e7erythin5 from you0 6ord by 6ord'

SIL' ut 6hat is the use of my spea8in5> ou don4t for5et one sin5le

detail0 but state e7erythin5 e@actly as it is'

$T' %t least ad7ise me0 and tell me 6hat I ou5ht to do in this6retched business'

SIL' I really feel as much perple@ed as you0 and I myself need thead7ice of some one to 5uide me'

$T' I am undone by this unforeseen return'

SIL' %nd I no less'

$T' ,hen my father hears 6hat has ta8en place0 a storm of reprimands

6ill burst upon me'

SIL' "eprimands are not 7ery hea7y to bear? 6ould to hea7en I 6erefree at that price< ut I am 7ery li8ely to pay dearly for all your

6ild doin5s0 and I see a storm of blo6s ready to burst upon my

shoulders'

$T' Hea7ens< ho6 am I to 5et clear of all the difficulties that

beset my path<

SIL' ou should ha7e thou5ht of that before enterin5 upon it'

$T' h0 don4t come and pla5ue me to death 6ith your unreasonablelectures'

SIL' ou pla5ue me much more by your foolish deeds'

$T' ,hat am I to do> ,hat steps must I ta8e> To 6hat course of

action ha7e recourse>

S$E&E II';;$T%9E0 S$%PI&0 SIL9EST"E'

S$%' Ho6 no60 Mr' cta7e> ,hat is the matter 6ith you> ,hat is it>,hat trouble are you in> ou are all upset0 I see'

$T' %h< my dear Scapin0 I am in despair? I am lost? I am the mostunfortunate of mortals'

S$%' Ho6 is that>

$T' Don4t you 8no6 anythin5 of 6hat has happened to me>

S$%' &o'

$T' My father is =ust returnin5 6ith Mr' *eronte0 and they 6ant to

marry me'

S$%' ,ell0 6hat is there so dreadful about that>

$T' %las< you don4t 8no6 6hat cause I ha7e to be an@ious'

S$%' &o? but it only depends on you that I should soon 8no6? and I am

a man of consolation0 a man 6ho can interest himself in the troubles

of youn5 people'

$T' %h< Scapin0 if you could find some scheme0 in7ent some plot0 to5et me out of the trouble I am in0 I should thin8 myself indebted to

you for more than life'

S$%' To tell you the truth0 there are fe6 thin5s impossible to me

6hen I once set about them' Hea7en has besto6ed on me a fair enou5h

share of 5enius for the ma8in5 up of all those neat stro8es of mother 6it0 for all those in5enious 5allantries to 6hich the i5norant and

7ul5ar 5i7e the name of impostures? and I can boast0 6ithout 7anity0

that there ha7e been 7ery fe6 men more s8ilful than I in e@pedients

and intri5ues0 and 6ho ha7e acquired a 5reater reputation in thenoble profession' ut0 to tell the truth0 merit is too ill re6arded

no6adays0 and I ha7e 5i7en up e7erythin5 of the 8ind since the

trouble I had throu5h a certain affair 6hich happened to me'

$T' Ho6> ,hat affair0 Scapin>

S$%' %n ad7enture in 6hich =ustice and I fell out'

$T' Austice and you>

S$%' es? 6e had a triflin5 quarrel'

SIL' ou and =ustice>

S$%' es' She used me 7ery badly? and I felt so enra5ed a5ainst the

in5ratitude of our a5e that I determined ne7er to do anythin5 for anybody' ut ne7er mind? tell me about yourself all the same'

$T' ou 8no60 Scapin0 that t6o months a5o Mr' *eronte and my father set out to5ether on a 7oya5e0 about a certain business in 6hich they

are both interested'

S$%' es0 I 8no6 that'

$T' %nd that both Leandre and I 6ere left by our respecti7e fathers0

I under the mana5ement of Sil7estre0 and Leandre under your mana5ement'

S$%' es? I ha7e acquitted myself 7ery 6ell of my char5e'

$T' Some time after6ards Leandre met 6ith a youn5 5ipsy 5irl0 6ith

6hom he fell in lo7e'

S$%' I 8no6 that too'

$T' %s 6e are 5reat friends0 he told me at once of his lo7e0 andtoo8 me to see this youn5 5irl0 6hom I thou5ht 5ood;loo8in50 it is

true0 but not so beautiful as he 6ould ha7e had me belie7e' He ne7er

spo8e of anythin5 but her? at e7ery opportunity he e@a55erated her 5race and her beauty0 e@tolled her intelli5ence0 spo8e to me 6ith

transport of the charms of her con7ersation0 and related to me her

most insi5nificant sayin50 6hich he al6ays 6anted me to thin8 thecle7erest thin5 in the 6orld' He often found fault 6ith me for not

thin8in5 as hi5hly as he ima5ined I ou5ht to do of the thin5s he

related to me0 and blamed me a5ain and a5ain for bein5 so insensible

to the po6er of lo7e'

S$%' I do not see 6hat you are aimin5 at in all this'

$T' ne day0 as I 6as 5oin5 6ith him to the people 6ho ha7e char5eof the 5irl 6ith 6hom he is in lo7e0 6e heard in a small house on a

by;street0 lamentations mi@ed 6ith a 5ood deal of sobbin5' ,einquired 6hat it 6as0 and 6ere told by a 6oman that 6e mi5ht see

there a most piteous si5ht0 in the persons of t6o stran5ers0 and that

unless 6e 6ere quite insensible to pity0 6e should be sure to betouched 6ith it'

S$%' ,here 6ill this lead to>

$T' $uriosity made me ur5e Leandre to come in 6ith me' ,e 6ent into

a lo6 room0 6here 6e sa6 an old 6oman dyin50 and 6ith her a ser7ant

6ho 6as utterin5 lamentations0 and a youn5 5irl dissol7ed in tears0the most beautiful0 the most touchin5 si5ht that you e7er sa6'

S$%' h< oh<

$T' %ny other person 6ould ha7e seemed fri5htful in the condition

she 6as in0 for all the dress she had on 6as a scanty old petticoat0

6ith a ni5ht =ac8et of plain fustian0 and turned bac8 at the top of her head a yello6 cap0 6hich let her hair fall in disorder on her

shoulders? and yet dressed e7en thus she shone 6ith a thousand

attractions0 and all her person 6as most charmin5 and pleasant'

S$%' I be5in to understand'

$T' Had you but seen her0 Scapin0 as I did0 you 6ould ha7e thou5ht

her admirable'

S$%' h< I ha7e no doubt about it? and 6ithout seein5 her0 I plainly

percei7e that she must ha7e been alto5ether charmin5'

$T' Her tears 6ere none of those unpleasant tears 6hich spoil theface? she had a most touchin5 5race in 6eepin50 and her sorro6 6as a

most beautiful thin5 to 6itness'

S$%' I can see all that'

$T' %ll 6ho approached her burst into tears 6hilst she thre6herself0 in her lo7in5 6ay0 on the body of the dyin5 6oman0 6hom she

called her dear mother? and nobody could help bein5 mo7ed to the

depths of the heart to see a 5irl 6ith such a lo7in5 disposition'

S$%' es0 all that is 7ery touchin5? and I understand that this

lo7in5 disposition made you lo7e her'

$T' %h< Scapin0 a sa7a5e 6ould ha7e lo7ed her'

S$%' $ertainly? ho6 could anyone help doin5 so>

$T' %fter a fe6 6ords0 6ith 6hich I tried to soothe her 5rief0 6e

left her? and 6hen I as8ed Leandre 6hat he thou5ht of her0 heans6ered coldly that she 6as rather pretty< I 6as 6ounded to find ho6

unfeelin5ly he spo8e to me of her0 and I 6ould not tell him the

effect her beauty had had on my heart'

SIL' (+to+ $T%9E)' If you do not abrid5e your story0 6e shall

ha7e to stop here till to;morro6' Lea7e it to me to finish it in a

fe6 6ords' (+To+ S$%PI&) His heart ta8es fire from that moment'He cannot li7e 6ithout 5oin5 to comfort the amiable and sorro6ful

5irl' His frequent 7isits are forbidden by the ser7ant0 6ho has

become her 5uardian by the death of the mother' ur youn5 man is indespair? he presses0 be5s0 beseeches;;all in 7ain' He is told that

the youn5 5irl0 althou5h 6ithout friends and 6ithout fortune0 is of

an honourable family0 and that0 unless he marries her0 he must cease

his 7isits' His lo7e increases 6ith the difficulties' He rac8s his brains? debates0 reasons0 ponders0 and ma8es up his mind' %nd0 to cut

a lon5 story short0 he has been married these three days'

S$%' I see'

SIL' &o60 add to this the unforeseen return of the father0 6ho 6asnot to be bac8 before t6o 6hole months? the disco7ery 6hich the uncle

has made of the marria5e? and that other marria5e pro=ected bet6een

him and a dau5hter 6hich Mr' *eronte had by a second 6ife0 6hom0 they

say0 he married at Tarentum'

$T' %nd0 abo7e all0 add also the po7erty of my belo7ed0 and the

impossibility there is for me to do anythin5 for her relief'

S$%' Is that all> ou are both of you at a 5reat loss about nothin5'

Is there any reason to be alarmed> %re you not ashamed0 you0Sil7estre0 to fall short in such a small matter> Deuce ta8e it all<

ou0 bi5 and stout as father and mother put to5ether0 you can4t find

any e@pedient in your noddle> you can4t plan any strata5em0 in7entany 5allant intri5ue to put matters strai5ht> #ie< Pla5ue on the

booby< I 6ish I had had the t6o old fello6s to bambooBle in former

times? I should not ha7e thou5ht much of it? and I 6as no bi55er than

that0 6hen I had 5i7en a hundred delicate proofs of my s8ill'

SIL' I ac8no6led5e that Hea7en has not 5i7en me your talent0 and that

I ha7e not the brains li8e you to embroil myself 6ith =ustice'

$T' Here is my lo7ely Hyacintha<

S$E&E III';;H%$I&TH%0 $T%9E0 S$%PI&0 SIL9EST"E'

H%' %h< cta7e0 is 6hat Sil7estre has =ust told &erine really true>

Is your father bac80 and is he bent upon marryin5 you>

$T' es0 it is so0 dear Hyacintha? and these tidin5s ha7e 5i7en me a

cruel shoc8' ut 6hat do I see> ou are 6eepin5> ,hy those tears> Doyou suspect me of unfaithfulness0 and ha7e you no assurance of the

lo7e I feel for you>

H%' es0 cta7e0 I am sure that you lo7e me no6? but can I be sure

that you 6ill lo7e me al6ays>

$T' %h< could anyone lo7e you once 6ithout lo7in5 you for e7er>

H%' I ha7e heard say0 cta7e0 that your se@ does not lo7e so lon5 as

ours0 and that the ardour men sho6 is a fire 6hich dies out as easilyas it is 8indled'

$T' Then0 my dear Hyacintha0 my heart is not li8e that of other men0and I feel certain that I shall lo7e you till I die'

H%' I 6ant to belie7e 6hat you say0 and I ha7e no doubt that you are

sincere? but I fear a po6er 6hich 6ill oppose in your heart the

tender feelin5s you ha7e for me' ou depend on a father 6ho 6ould

marry you to another0 and I am sure it 6ould 8ill me if such a thin5

happened'

$T' &o0 lo7ely Hyacintha0 there is no father 6ho can force me to

brea8 my faith to you0 and I could resol7e to lea7e my country0 ande7en to die0 rather than be separated from you' ,ithout ha7in5 seen

her0 I ha7e already concei7ed a horrible a7ersion to her 6hom they

6ant me to marry? and althou5h I am not cruel0 I 6ish the sea 6oulds6allo6 her up0 or dri7e her hence fore7er' Do not 6eep0 then0 dear

Hyacintha0 for your tears 8ill me0 and I cannot see them 6ithout

feelin5 pierced to the heart'

H%' Since you 6ish it0 I 6ill dry my tears0 and I 6ill 6ait 6ithout

fear for 6hat Hea7en shall decide'

$T' Hea7en 6ill be fa7ourable to us'

H%' It cannot be a5ainst us if you are faithful'

$T' I certainly shall be so'

H%' Then I shall be happy'

S$%' (+aside+)' She is not so bad0 after all0 and I thin8 her

pretty enou5h'

$T' (+sho6in5+ S$%PI&)' Here is a man 6ho0 if he 6ould0 could

be of the 5reatest help to us in all our trouble'

S$%' I ha7e s6orn 6ith many oaths ne7er more to meddle 6ith anythin5'

ut if you both entreat me 7ery much0 I mi5ht''''

$T' %h< if entreaties 6ill obtain your help0 I beseech you 6ith all

my heart to steer our bar8'

S$%' (+to+ H%$I&TH%)' %nd you0 ha7e you anythin5 to say>

H%' Li8e him0 I beseech you0 by all that is most dear to you uponearth0 to assist us in our lo7e'

S$%' I must ha7e a little humanity0 and 5i7e 6ay' There0 don4t beafraid? I 6ill do all I can for you'

$T' e sure that''''

S$%' (+to+ $T%9E)' Hush< (+To+ H%$I&TH%) *o0 and ma8e

yourself easy'

S$E&E I9';;$T%9E0 S$%PI&0 SIL9EST"E'

S$%' (+to+ $T%9E)' ou must prepare yourself to recei7e your father 6ith firmness'

$T' I confess that this meetin5 fri5htens me before hand0 for 6ith

him I ha7e a natural shyness that I cannot conquer'

S$%' es? you must be firm from the first0 for fear that he should

ta8e ad7anta5e of your 6ea8ness0 and lead you li8e a child' &o60

come0 try to school yourself into some amount of firmness0 and beready to ans6er boldly all he can say to you'

$T' I 6ill do the best I can'

S$%' ,ell< let us try a little0 =ust to see' "ehearse your part0 andlet us see ho6 you 6ill mana5e' $ome0 a loo8 of decision0 your head

erect0 a bold face'

$T' Li8e this'

S$%' % little more'

$T' So>

S$%' That 6ill do' &o60 fancy that I am your father0 =ust arri7ed?ans6er me boldly as if it 6ere he himself';;C,hat< you scoundrel0

you 5ood;for;nothin5 fello60 you infamous rascal0 un6orthy son of

such a father as I0 dare you appear before me after 6hat you ha7e

done0 and after the infamous tric8 you ha7e played me durin5 myabsence> Is this0 you rascal0 the re6ard of all my care> Is this the

fruit of all my de7otion> Is this the respect due to me> Is this the

respect you retain for me>C;;&o6 then0 no6 then';;Cou are insolentenou5h0 scoundrel0 to 5o and en5a5e yourself 6ithout the consent of

your father0 and contract a clandestine marria5e< %ns6er me0 you

7illain< %ns6er me' Let me hear your fine reasonsC'''';;,hy0 thedeuce0 you seem quite lost'

$T' It is because I ima5ine I hear my father spea8in5'

S$%' ,hy0 yes? and it is for this reason that you must try not to

loo8 li8e an idiot'

$T' I 6ill be more resolute0 and 6ill ans6er more firmly'

S$%' uite sure>

SIL' Here is your father comin5'

$T' h hea7ens

S$%' Lea7e him to me? only follo6 me'

S$E&E 9I';;%"*%&TE0 S$%PI&0 SIL9EST"E (+at the further part of the

sta5e+)'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' Did anyone e7er hear of such an

action>

S$%' (+to+ SIL9EST"E)' He has already heard of the affair0 and

is so struc8 by it that0 althou5h alone0 he spea8s aloud about it'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' Such a bold thin5 to do'

S$%' (+to+ SIL9EST"E)' Let us listen to him'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' I should li8e to 8no6 6hat they

can say to me about this fine marria5e'

S$%' (+aside+)' ,e ha7e it all ready'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' ,ill they try to deny it>

S$%' (+aside+)' &o 6e ha7e no thou5ht of doin5 so'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' r 6ill they underta8e toe@cuse it>

S$%' (+aside+)' That may be'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' Do they intend to decei7e me

6ith impertinent stories>

S$%' (+aside+)' May be'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' %ll they can say 6ill beuseless'

S$%' ,e shall see'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' They 6ill not ta8e me in'

S$%' (+aside+)' I don4t 8no6 that'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' I shall 8no6 ho6 to put myrascal of a son in a safe place'

S$%' (+aside+)' ,e shall see about that'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' %nd as for that rascal

Sil7estre0 I 6ill cud5el him soundly'

SIL' (+to+ S$%PI&)' I should ha7e been 7ery much astonished if

he had for5otten me'

%"*' (+seein5+ SIL9EST"E)' %h0 ah< here you are0 most 6ise

5o7ernor of a family0 fine director of youn5 people<

S$%' Sir0 I am deli5hted to see you bac8'

%"*' *ood mornin50 Scapin' (+To+ SIL9EST"E) ou ha7e really

follo6ed my orders in a fine manner0 and my son has beha7edsplendidly'

S$%' ou are quite 6ell0 I see'

%"*' Pretty 6ell' (+To+ SIL9EST"E) ou don4t say a 6ord0 you

rascal<

S$%' Ha7e you had a pleasant =ourney>

%"*' es0 yes0 7ery 5ood' Lea7e me alone a little to scold this7illain<

S$%' ou 6ant to scold>

%"*' es0 I 6ish to scold'

S$%' ut 6hom0 Sir>

%"*' (+Pointin5 to+ SIL9EST"E)' This scoundrel<

S$%' ,hy>

%"*' Ha7e you not heard 6hat has ta8en place durin5 my absence>

S$%' es0 I ha7e heard some triflin5 thin5'

%"*' Ho6< Some triflin5 thin5< Such an action as this>

S$%' ou are about ri5ht'

%"*' Such a darin5 thin5 to do<

S$%' That4s quite true'

%"*' To marry 6ithout his father4s consent<

S$%' es0 there is somethin5 to be said a5ainst it0 but my opinion is

that you should ma8e no fuss about it'

%"*' This is your opinion0 but not mine? and I 6ill ma8e as much fuss

as I please' ,hat< do you not thin8 that I ha7e e7ery reason to be

an5ry>

S$%' uite so' I 6as an5ry myself 6hen I first heard it? and I so far

felt interested in your behalf that I rated your son 6ell' Aust as8

him the fine sermons I 5a7e him0 and ho6 I lectured him about thelittle respect he sho6ed his father0 6hose 7ery footsteps he ou5ht to

8iss' ou could not yourself tal8 better to him' ut 6hat of that> I

submitted to reason0 and considered that0 after all0 he had donenothin5 so dreadful'

%"*' ,hat are you tellin5 me> He has done nothin5 so dreadful> ,hen

he 5oes and marries strai5ht off a perfect stran5er>

S$%' ,hat can one do> he 6as ur5ed to it by his destiny'

%"*' h0 oh< ou 5i7e me there a fine reason' ne has nothin5 better

to do no6 than to commit the 5reatest crime ima5inable;;to cheat0

steal0 and murder;;and 5i7e for an e@cuse that 6e 6ere ur5ed to it bydestiny'

S$%' %h me< ou ta8e my 6ords too much li8e a philosopher' I mean tosay that he 6as fatally en5a5ed in this affair'

%"*' %nd 6hy did he en5a5e in it>

S$%' Do you e@pect him to be as 6ise as you are> $an you put an old

head on youn5 shoulders0 and e@pect youn5 people to ha7e all the

prudence necessary to do nothin5 but 6hat is reasonable> Aust loo8 at

our Leandre0 6ho0 in spite of all my lessons0 has done e7en 6orsethan that' I should li8e to 8no6 6hether you yourself 6ere not youn5

once0 and ha7e not played as many pran8s as others> I ha7e heard saythat you 6ere a sad fello6 in your time0 that you played the 5allant

amon5 the most 5allant of those days0 and that you ne7er 5a7e in

until you had 5ained your point'

%"*' It is true0 I 5rant it? but I al6ays confined myself to

5allantry0 and ne7er 6ent so far as to do 6hat he has done'

S$%' ut 6hat 6as he to do> He sees a youn5 person 6ho 6ishes him

6ell? for he inherits it from you that all 6omen lo7e him' He thin8s

her charmin50 5oes to see her0 ma8es lo7e to her0 si5hs as lo7erssi5h0 and does the passionate s6ain' She yields to his pressin5

7isits? he pushes his fortune' ut her relations catch him 6ith her0

and obli5e him to marry her by main force'

SIL' (+aside+)' ,hat a cle7er cheat<

S$%' ,ould you ha7e him suffer them to murder him> It is still better to be married than to be dead'

%"*' I 6as not told that the thin5 had happened in that 6ay'

S$%' (+sho6in5+ SIL9EST"E)' %s8 him0 if you li8e? he 6ill tell

you the same thin5'

%"*' (+to+ SIL9EST"E)' ,as he married a5ainst his 6ish>

SIL' es0 Sir'

S$%' Do you thin8 I 6ould tell you an untruth>

%"*' Then he should ha7e 5one at once to a la6yer to protest a5ainst

the 7iolence'

S$%' It is the 7ery thin5 he 6ould not do'

%"*' It 6ould ha7e made it easier for me to brea8 off the marria5e'

S$%' rea8 off the marria5e>

%"*' es

S$%' ou 6ill not brea8 it off'

%"*' I shall not brea8 it off>

S$%' &o'

%"*' ,hat< Ha7e I not on my side the ri5hts of a father0 and can I

not ha7e satisfaction for the 7iolence done to my son>

S$%' This is a thin5 he 6ill not consent to'

%"*' He 6ill not consent to it>

S$%' &o'

%"*' My son>

S$%' our son' ,ould you ha7e him ac8no6led5e that he 6as fri5htened0and that he yielded by force to 6hat 6as 6anted of him> He 6ill ta8e

care not to confess that? it 6ould be to 6ron5 himself0 and sho6

himself un6orthy of a father li8e you'

%"*' I don4t care for all that'

S$%' He must0 for his o6n honour and yours0 say that he married of his o6n free 6ill'

%"*' %nd I 6ish for my o6n honour0 and for his0 that he should saythe contrary'

S$%' I am sure he 6ill not do that'

%"*' I shall soon ma8e him do it'

S$%' He 6ill not ac8no6led5e it0 I tell you'

%"*' He shall do it0 or I 6ill disinherit him'

S$%' ou>

%"*' I'

S$%' &onsense<

%"*' Ho6 nonsense>

S$%' ou 6ill not disinherit him'

%"*' I shall not disinherit him>

S$%' &o'

%"*' &o>

S$%' &o'

%"*' ,ell< This is really too much

S$%' ou yourself'

%"*' I>

S$%' es? you 6ill ne7er ha7e the heart to do it'

%"*' I shall ha7e the heart'

S$%' ou are =o8in5'

%"*' I am not =o8in5'

S$%' Paternal lo7e 6ill carry the day'

%"*' &o0 it 6ill not'

S$%' es0 yes'

%"*' I tell you that I 6ill disinherit him'

S$%' "ubbish'

%"*' ou may say rubbish? but I 6ill'

S$%' *racious me0 I 8no6 that you are naturally a 8ind;hearted man'

%"*' &o0 I am not 8ind;hearted? I can be an5ry 6hen I choose' Lea7e

off tal8in5? you put me out of all patience' (+To+ SL9EST"E)

*o0 you rascal0 run and fetch my son0 6hile I 5o to Mr' *eronte andtell him of my misfortune'

S$%' Sir0 if I can be useful to you in any 6ay0 you ha7e but to order

me'

%"*' I than8 you' (+%side+) %h< ,hy is he my only son> h< thatI had 6ith me the dau5hter that Hea7en has ta8en a6ay from me0 so

that I mi5ht ma8e her my heir'

S$E&E 9II';;S$%PI&0 SL9EST"E'

SIL' ou are a 5reat man0 I must confess? and thin5s are in a fair

6ay to succeed' ut0 on the other hand0 6e are 5reatly pressed for money0 and 6e ha7e people dunnin5 us'

S$%' Lea7e it to me? the plan is all ready' I am only puBBlin5 my brains to find out a fello6 to act alon5 6ith us0 in order to play a

persona5e I 6ant' ut let me see? =ust loo8 at me a little' Stic8

your cap rather ra8ishly on one side' Put on a furious loo8' Put your

hand on your side' ,al8 about li8e a 8in5 on the sta5e' F#ootnote$ompare the 4Impromptu of 9ersailles4'G That 6ill do' #ollo6 me' I

possess some means of chan5in5 your face and 7oice'

SIL' I pray you0 Scapin0 don4t 5o and embroil me 6ith =ustice'

S$%' &e7er mind0 6e 6ill share our perils li8e brothers0 and threeyears more or less on the 5alleys are not sufficient to chec8 a noble

heart'



%$T II'

S$E&E I';;*E"&TE0 %"*%&TE'

*E"' es0 there is no doubt but that 6ith this 6eather 6e shall ha7e

our people 6ith us to;day? and a sailor 6ho has arri7ed from Tarentumtold me =ust no6 that he had seen our man about to start 6ith the

ship' ut my dau5hter4s arri7al 6ill find thin5s stran5ely altered

from 6hat 6e thou5ht they 6ould be0 and 6hat you ha7e =ust told me of

your son has put an end to all the plans 6e had made to5ether'

%"*' Don4t be an@ious about that? I 5i7e you my 6ord that I shall

remo7e that obstacle0 and I am 5oin5 to see about it this moment'

*E"' In all 5ood faith0 Mr' %r5ante0 shall I tell you 6hat> The

education of children is a thin5 that one could ne7er be too carefulabout'

%"*' ou are ri5ht? but 6hy do you say that>

*E"' ecause most of the follies of youn5 men come from the 6ay they

ha7e been brou5ht up by their fathers'

%"*' It is so sometimes0 certainly? but 6hat do you mean by sayin5

that to me>

*E"' ,hy do I say that to you>

%"*' es'

*E"' ecause0 if0 li8e a coura5eous father0 you had corrected your

son 6hen he 6as youn50 he 6ould not ha7e played you such a tric8'

%"*' I see' So that you ha7e corrected your o6n much better>

*E"' $ertainly? and I should be 7ery sorry if he had done anythin5 atall li8e 6hat yours has done'

%"*' %nd if that son0 so 6ell brou5ht up0 had done 6orse e7en thanmine0 6hat 6ould you say>

*E"' ,hat>

%"*' ,hat>

*E"' ,hat do you mean>

%"*' I mean0 Mr' *eronte0 that 6e should ne7er be so ready to blame

the conduct of others0 and that those 6ho li7e in 5lass houses shouldnot thro6 stones'

*E"' I really do not understand you'

%"*' I 6ill e@plain myself'

*E"' Ha7e you heard anythin5 about my son>

%"*' Perhaps I ha7e'

*E"' ut 6hat>

%"*' our ser7ant Scapin0 in his 7e@ation0 only told me the thin5rou5hly0 and you can learn all the particulars from him or from some

one else' #or my part0 I 6ill at once 5o to my solicitor0 and see

6hat steps I can ta8e in the matter' *ood;bye'

S$E&E II';;*E"&TE (+alone+)'

*E"' ,hat can it be> ,orse than 6hat his son has done< I am sure Idon4t 8no6 6hat anyone can do more 6ron5 than that? and to marry

6ithout the consent of one4s father is the 6orst thin5 that I can

possibly ima5ine' F#ootnote &o e@a55eration0 if 6e consider thatthis 6as said t6o hundred years a5o0 and by a #rench father'G

S$E&E III;;*E"&TE0 LE%&D"E'

*E"' %h0 here you are<

LE%' (+5oin5 quic8ly to6ards his father to embrace him+)' %h<father0 ho6 5lad I am to see you<

*E"' (+refusin5 to embrace him+)' Stay0 I ha7e to spea8 to you

first'

LE%' %llo6 me to embrace you0 and''''

*E"' (+refusin5 him a5ain+)' *ently0 I tell you'

LE%' Ho6< father0 you depri7e me of the pleasure of sho6in5 you my =oy at your return>

*E"' $ertainly? 6e ha7e somethin5 to settle first of all'

LE%' ut 6hat>

*E"' Aust stand there before me0 and let me loo8 at you'

LE%' ,hat for>

*E"' Loo8 me strai5ht in the face'

LE%' ,ell>

*E"' ,ill you tell me 6hat has ta8en place here in my absence>

LE%' ,hat has ta8en place>

*E"' es? 6hat did you do 6hile I 6as a6ay>

LE%' ,hat 6ould you ha7e me do0 father>

*E"' It is not I 6ho 6anted you to do anythin50 but 6ho as8 you no66hat it is you did>

LE%' I ha7e done nothin5 to 5i7e you reason to complain'

*E"' &othin5 at all>

LE%' &o'

*E"' ou spea8 in a 7ery decided tone'

LE%' It is because I am innocent'

*E"' %nd yet Scapin has told me all about you'

LE%' Scapin<

*E"' h< oh< that name ma8es you chan5e colour'

LE%' He has told you somethin5 about me>

*E"' He has' ut this is not the place to tal8 about the business0

and 6e must 5o else6here to see to it' *o home at once? I 6ill be

there presently' %h< scoundrel0 if you mean to brin5 dishonour uponme0 I 6ill renounce you for my son0 and you 6ill ha7e to a7oid my

presence for e7er<

S$E&E I9';;LE%&D"E (+alone+)'

LE%' To betray me after that fashion< % rascal 6ho for so many

reasons should be the first to 8eep secret 6hat I trust him 6ith< To

5o and tell e7erythin5 to my father< %h ,hat a 6onderful man

you are0 and ho6 8ind of Hea7en to send you to my help<

LE%' %h0 ah< here you are0 you rascal<

S$%' Sir0 your ser7ant? you do me too much honour'

LE%' (+dra6in5 his s6ord+)' ou are settin5 me at defiance0 I belie7e'''%h< I 6ill teach you ho6''''

S$%' (+fallin5 on his 8nees+)' Sir<

$T' (+steppin5 bet6een them+)' %h< Leandre'

LE%' &o0 cta7e0 do not 8eep me bac8'

S$%' (+to+ LE%&D"E)' Eh< Sir'

$T' (+8eepin5 bac8+ LE%&D"E)' #or mercy4s sa8e<

LE%' (+tryin5 to stri8e+)' Lea7e me to 6rea8 my an5er upon him'

$T' In the name of our friendship0 Leandre0 do not stri8e him'

S$%' ,hat ha7e I done to you0 Sir>

LE%' ,hat you ha7e done0 you scoundrel<

$T' (+still 8eepin5 bac8+ LE%&D"E)' *ently0 5ently'

LE%' &o0 cta7e0 I 6ill ha7e him confess here on the spot the perfidyof 6hich he is 5uilty' es0 scoundrel0 I 8no6 the tric8 you ha7e

played me? I ha7e =ust been told of it' ou did not thin8 the secret

6ould be re7ealed to me0 did you> ut I 6ill ha7e you confess it 6ith

your o6n lips0 or I 6ill run you throu5h and throu5h 6ith my s6ord'

S$%' %h< Sir0 could you really be so cruel as that>

LE%' Spea80 I say'

S$%' I ha7e done somethin5 a5ainst you0 Sir>

LE%' es0 scoundrel< and your conscience must tell you only too 6ell

6hat it is'

S$%' I assure you that I do not 8no6 6hat you mean'

LE%' (+5oin5 to6ards+ S$%PI& +to stri8e him+)' ou do not8no6>

$T' (+8eepin5 bac8+ LE%&D"E)' Leandre<

S$%' ,ell0 Sir0 since you 6ill ha7e it0 I confess that I dran8 6ith

some of my friends that small cas8 of Spanish 6ine you recei7ed as a present some days a5o0 and that it 6as I 6ho made that openin5 in the

cas80 and spilled some 6ater on the 5round round it0 to ma8e you

belie7e that all the 6ine had lea8ed out'

LE%' ,hat< scoundrel0 it 6as you 6ho dran8 my Spanish 6ine0 and 6ho

suffered me to scold the ser7ant so much0 because I thou5ht it 6as

she 6ho had played me that tric8>

S$%' es0 Sir? I am 7ery sorry0 Sir'

LE%' I am 5lad to 8no6 this' ut this is not 6hat I am about no6'

S$%' It is not that0 Sir>

LE%' &o? it is somethin5 else0 for 6hich I care much more0 and I 6ill

ha7e you tell it me'

S$%' I do not remember0 Sir0 that I e7er did anythin5 else'

LE%' (+tryin5 to stri8e+ S$%PI&)' ,ill you spea8>

S$%' %h<

$T' (+8eepin5 bac8+ LE%&D"E)' *ently'

S$%' es0 Sir? it is true that three 6ee8s a5o0 6hen you sent me in

the e7enin5 to ta8e a small 6atch to the 5ypsy F#ootnote +E5yptienne+' $ompare act 7' scene ii' +ohemienne+ is a more

usual name'G 5irl you lo7e0 and I came bac80 my clothes spattered 6ith

mud and my face co7ered 6ith blood0 I told you that I had been attac8ed

by robbers 6ho had beaten me soundly and had stolen the 6atch fromme' It is true that I told a lie' It 6as I 6ho 8ept the 6atch0 Sir'

LE%' It 6as you 6ho stole the 6atch>

S$%' es0 Sir0 in order to 8no6 the time'

LE%' %h< you are tellin5 me fine thin5s? I ha7e indeed a 7ery

faithful ser7ant< ut it is not this that I 6ant to 8no6 of you'

S$%' It is not this>

LE%' &o0 infamous 6retch< it is somethin5 else that I 6ant you toconfess'

S$%' (+aside+)' Mercy on me<

LE%' Spea8 at once? I 6ill not be put off'

S$%' Sir0 I ha7e done nothin5 else'

LE%' (+tryin5 to stri8e+ S$%PI&)' &othin5 else>

$T' (+steppin5 bet6een them+)' %h

LE%' ,ell>

S$%' It 6as I0 Sir0 6ho 6as playin5 the 5host'

LE%' It 6as you0 6retch< 6ho 6ere playin5 the 5host>

S$%' nly to fri5hten you a little0 and to cure you of the habit of ma8in5 us 5o out e7ery ni5ht as you did'

LE%' I 6ill remember in proper time and place all I ha7e =ust heard'ut I4ll ha7e you spea8 about the present matter0 and tell me 6hat it

is you said to my father'

S$%' ,hat I said to your father>

LE%' es0 scoundrel< to my father'

S$%' ,hy0 I ha7e not seen him since his return<

LE%' ou ha7e not seen him>

S$%' &o0 Sir'

LE%' Is that the truth>

S$%' The perfect truth? and he shall tell you so himself'

LE%' %nd yet it 6as he himself 6ho told me'

S$%' ,ith your lea7e0 Sir0 he did not tell you the truth'

S$E&E 9I';;LE%&D"E0 $T%9E0 $%"LE0 S$%PI&'

$%"' Sir0 I brin5 you 7ery bad ne6s concernin5 your lo7e affair'

LE%' ,hat is it no6>

$%"' The 5ypsies are on the point of carryin5 off :erbinette' She

came herself all in tears to as8 me to tell you that0 unless you ta8e

to them0 before t6o hours are o7er0 the money they ha7e as8ed you for her0 she 6ill be lost to you for e7er'

LE%' T6o hours>

$%"' T6o hours'

S$E&E 9II';;LE%&D"E0 $T%9E0 S$%PI&'

LE%' %h< my dear Scapin0 I pray you to help me'

S$%' (+risin5 and passin5 proudly before+ LE%&D"E)' %h< my dear

Scapin< I am my dear Scapin0 no6 that I am 6anted'

LE%' I 6ill for5i7e you all that you confessed =ust no60 and morealso'

S$%' &o0 no? for5i7e me nothin5? run your s6ord throu5h and throu5h

my body' I should be perfectly satisfied if you 6ere to 8ill me'

LE%' I beseech you rather to 5i7e me life by ser7in5 my lo7e'

S$%' &ay0 nay? better 8ill me'

LE%' ou are too dear to me for that' I be5 of you to ma8e use for me

of that 6onderful 5enius of yours 6hich can conquer e7erythin5'

S$%' $ertainly not' ill me0 I tell you'

LE%' %h< for mercy4s sa8e0 don4t thin8 of that no60 but try to 5i7e

me the help I as8'

$T' Scapin0 you must do somethin5 to help him'

S$%' Ho6 can I after such abuse>

LE%' I beseech you to for5et my outburst of temper0 and to ma8e use

of your s8ill for me'

$T' I add my entreaties to his'

S$%' I cannot for5et such an insult'

$T' ou must not 5i7e 6ay to resentment0 Scapin'

LE%' $ould you forsa8e me0 Scapin0 in this cruel e@tremity>

S$%' To come all of a sudden and insult me li8e that'

LE%' I 6as 6ron50 I ac8no6led5e'

S$%' To call me scoundrel0 8na7e0 infamous 6retch<

LE%' I am really 7ery sorry'

S$%' To 6ish to send your s6ord throu5h my body<

LE%' I as8 you to for5i7e me0 6ith all my heart? and if you 6ant to

see me at your feet0 I beseech you0 8neelin50 not to 5i7e me up'

$T' Scapin0 you cannot resist that>

S$%' ,ell0 5et up0 and another time remember not to be so hasty'

LE%' ,ill you try to act for me>

S$%' I 6ill see'

LE%' ut you 8no6 that time presses'

S$%' Don4t be an@ious' Ho6 much is it you 6ant>

LE%' #i7e hundred cro6ns'

S$%' ou>

$T' T6o hundred pistoles'

S$%' I must e@tract this money from your respecti7e fathers4 poc8ets'

(+To+ $T%9E) %s far as yours is concerned0 my plan is allready' (+To+ LE%&D"E) %nd as for yours0 althou5h he is the

5reatest miser ima5inable0 6e shall find it easier still? for you

8no6 that he is not blessed 6ith too much intellect0 and I loo8 upon

him as a man 6ho 6ill belie7e anythin5' This cannot offend you? thereis not a suspicion of a resemblance bet6een him and you? and you 8no6

6hat the 6orld thin8s0 that he is your father only in name'

LE%' *ently0 Scapin'

S$%' esides0 6hat does it matter> ut0 Mr' cta7e0 I see your father comin5' Let us be5in by him0 since he is the first to cross our path'

9anish both of you? (+to+ $T%9E) and you0 please0 tell Sil7estre

to come quic8ly0 and ta8e his part in the affair'

S$E&E 9III';;%"*%&TE0 S$%PI&'

S$%' (+aside+)' Here he is0 turnin5 it o7er in his mind'

%"*' (+thin8in5 himself alone+)' Such beha7iour and such lac8 of

consideration< To entan5le himself in an en5a5ement li8e that< %h<rash youth'

S$%' our ser7ant0 Sir'

%"*' *ood mornin50 Scapin'

S$%' ou are thin8in5 of your son4s conduct'

%"*' es0 I ac8no6led5e that it 5rie7es me deeply'

S$%' %h< Sir0 life is full of troubles? and 6e should al6ays be

prepared for them' I 6as told0 a lon5 time a5o0 the sayin5 of an

ancient philosopher 6hich I ha7e ne7er for5otten'

%"*' ,hat 6as it>

S$%' That if the father of a family has been a6ay from home for e7er so short a time0 he ou5ht to d6ell upon all the sad ne6s that may

5reet him on his return' He ou5ht to fancy his house burnt do6n0 his

money stolen0 his 6ife dead0 his son married0 his dau5hter ruined?and be 7ery than8ful for 6hate7er falls short of all this' In my

small 6ay of philosophy0 I ha7e e7er ta8en this lesson to heart? and

I ne7er come home but I e@pect to ha7e to bear 6ith the an5er of mymasters0 their scoldin5s0 insults0 8ic8s0 blo6s0 and horse;6hippin5'

%nd I al6ays than8 my destiny for 6hate7er I do not recei7e'

%"*' That4s all 7ery 6ell? but this rash marria5e is more than I can put up 6ith0 and it forces me to brea8 off the match I had intended

for my son' I ha7e come from my solicitor4s to see if 6e can cancel

it'

S$%' ,ell0 Sir0 if you 6ill ta8e my ad7ice0 you 6ill loo8 to some

other 6ay of settlin5 this business' ou 8no6 6hat a la6;suit meansin this country0 and you4ll find yourself in the midst of a stran5e

bush of thorns'

%"*' I am fully a6are that you are quite ri5ht? but 6hat else can I

do>

S$%' I thin8 I ha7e found somethin5 that 6ill ans6er much better' Thesorro6 that I felt for you made me rumma5e in my head to find some

means of 5ettin5 you out of trouble? for I cannot bear to see 8ind

fathers a prey to 5rief 6ithout feelin5 sad about it0 and0 besides0 Iha7e at all times had the 5reatest re5ard for you'

%"*' I am much obli5ed to you'

S$%' Then you must 8no6 that I 6ent to the brother of the youn5 5irl

6hom your son has married' He is one of those fire;eaters0 one of

those men all s6ord;thrusts0 6ho spea8 of nothin5 but fi5htin50 and6ho thin8 no more of 8illin5 a man than of s6allo6in5 a 5lass of

6ine' I 5ot him to spea8 of this marria5e? I sho6ed him ho6 easy it

6ould be to ha7e it bro8en off0 because of the 7iolence used to6ards

your son' I spo8e to him of your prero5ati7es as father0 and of the6ei5ht 6hich your ri5hts0 your money0 and your friends 6ould ha7e

6ith =ustice' I mana5ed him so that at last he lent a ready ear tothe propositions I made to him of arran5in5 the matter amicably for a

sum of money' In short0 he 6ill 5i7e his consent to the marria5e

bein5 cancelled0 pro7ided you pay him 6ell'

%"*' %nd ho6 much did he as8>

S$%' h< at first thin5s utterly out of the question'

%"*' ut 6hat>

S$%' Thin5s utterly e@tra7a5ant'

%"*' ut 6hat>

S$%' He spo8e of no less than fi7e or si@ hundred pistoles'

%"*' #i7e or si@ hundred a5ues to cho8e him 6ithal' Does he thin8 mea fool>

S$%' Aust 6hat I told him' I lau5hed his proposal to scorn0 and madehim understand that you 6ere not a man to be duped in that fashion0

and of 6hom anyone can as8 fi7e or si@ hundred pistoles< Ho6e7er0

after much tal8in50 this is 6hat 6e decided upon' CThe time is no6come0C he said0 C6hen I must 5o and re=oin the army' I am buyin5 my

equipments0 and the 6ant of money I am in forces me to listen to 6hat

you propose' I must ha7e a horse0 and I cannot obtain one at all fit

for the ser7ice under si@ty pistoles'C

%"*' ,ell0 yes? I am 6illin5 to 5i7e si@ty pistoles'

S$%' He must ha7e the harness and pistols0 and that 6ill cost 7ery

nearly t6enty pistoles more'

%"*' T6enty and si@ty ma8e ei5hty'

S$%' E@actly'

%"*' It4s a 5reat deal? still0 I consent to that'

S$%' He must also ha7e a horse for his ser7ant0 6hich0 6e may e@pect06ill cost at least thirty pistoles'

%"*' Ho60 the deuce< Let him 5o to Aericho' He shall ha7e nothin5 at

all'

S$%' Sir<

%"*' &o? he4s an insolent fello6'

S$%' ,ould you ha7e his ser7ant 6al8>

%"*' Let him 5et alon5 as he pleases0 and the master too'

S$%' &o60 Sir0 really don4t 5o and hesitate for so little' Don4t ha7e

recourse to la60 I be5 of you0 but rather 5i7e all that is as8ed of

you0 and sa7e yourself from the clutches of =ustice'

%"*' ,ell0 6ell< I 6ill brin5 myself to 5i7e these thirty pistoles

also'

S$%' CI must also ha7e0C he said0 Ca mule to carry''''C

%"*' Let him 5o to the de7il 6ith his mule< This is as8in5 too much',e 6ill 5o before the =ud5es'

S$%' I be5 of you0 Sir<

%"*' &o0 I 6ill not 5i7e in'

S$%' Sir0 only one small mule'

%"*' &o? not e7en an ass'

S$%' $onsider''''

%"*' &o0 I tell you? I prefer 5oin5 to la6'

S$%' %h< Sir0 6hat are you tal8in5 about0 and 6hat a resolution you

are 5oin5 to ta8e' Aust cast a 5lance on the ins and outs of =ustice0loo8 at the number of appeals0 of sta5es of =urisdiction? ho6 many

embarrassin5 procedures? ho6 many ra7enin5 6ol7es throu5h 6hose cla6s

you 6ill ha7e to pass? ser=eants0 solicitors0 counsel0 re5istrars0substitutes0 recorders0 =ud5es and their cler8s' There is not one of

these 6ho0 for the merest trifle0 couldn4t 8noc8 o7er the best case

in the 6orld' % ser=eant 6ill issue false 6rits 6ithout your 8no6in5

anythin5 of it' our solicitor 6ill act in concert 6ith your ad7ersary0 and sell you for ready money' our counsel0 bribed in the

same 6ay0 6ill be no6here to be found 6hen your case comes on0 or

else 6ill brin5 for6ard ar5uments 6hich are the merest shootin5 in

the air0 and 6ill ne7er come to the point' The re5istrar 6ill issue6rits and decrees a5ainst you for contumacy' The recorder4s cler8

6ill ma8e a6ay 6ith some of your papers0 or the instructin5 officer himself 6ill not say 6hat he has seen0 and 6hen0 by dint of the

6ariest possible precautions0 you ha7e escaped all these traps0 you

6ill be amaBed that your =ud5es ha7e been set a5ainst you either by bi5ots or by the 6omen they lo7e' %h< Sir0 sa7e yourself from such a

hell0 if you can' 4Tis damnation in this 6orld to ha7e to 5o to la6?

and the mere thou5ht of a la6suit is quite enou5h to dri7e me to the

other end of the 6orld'

%"*' Ho6 much does he 6ant for the mule>

S$%' #or the mule0 for his horse and that of his ser7ant0 for the

harness and pistols0 and to pay a little somethin5 he o6es at the

hotel0 he as8s alto5ether t6o hundred pistoles0 Sir'

%"*' T6o hundred pistoles>

S$%' es'

%"*' (+6al8in5 about an5rily+)' &o0 no? 6e 6ill 5o to la6'

S$%' "ecollect 6hat you are doin5'

%"*' I shall 5o to la6'

S$%' Don4t 5o and e@pose yourself to''''

%"*' I 6ill 5o to la6'

S$%' ut to 5o to la6 you need money' ou must ha7e money for the

summons0 you must ha7e money for the rolls0 for prosecution0attorney4s introduction0 solicitor4s ad7ice0 e7idence0 and his days

in court' ou must ha7e money for the consultations and pleadin5s of

the counsel0 for the ri5ht of 6ithdra6in5 the briefs0 and for en5rossed copies of the documents' ou must ha7e money for the

reports of the substitutes0 for the court fees F1G at the conclusion0

for re5istrar4s enrolment0 dra6in5 up of deeds0 sentences0 decrees0rolls0 si5nin5s0 and cler8s4 despatches? lettin5 alone all the

presents you 6ill ha7e to ma8e' *i7e this money to the man0 and there

you are 6ell out of the 6hole thin5'

F1G +Epices+0 Cspices0C in ancient times0 equalled

+s6eetmeats+0 and 6ere 5i7en to the =ud5e by the side 6hich

5ained the suit0 as a mar8 of 5ratitude' These +epices+ had lon5

been chan5ed into a compulsory payment of money 6hen Moliere 6rote'In "acine4s +Plaideurs+0 act ii' scene 7ii'0 Petit Aean ta8es

literally the demand of the =ud5e for +epices+0 and fetches the pepper;bo@ to satisfy him'

%"*' T6o hundred pistoles<

S$%' es0 and you 6ill sa7e by it' I ha7e made a small calculation in

my head of all that =ustice costs0 and I find that by 5i7in5 t6o

hundred pistoles to your man you 6ill ha7e a lar5e mar5in left;;say0at least a hundred and fifty pistoles;;6ithout ta8in5 into

consideration the cares0 troubles0 and an@ieties0 6hich you 6ill

spare yourself' #or 6ere it only to a7oid bein5 before e7erybody the butt of some facetious counsel0 I had rather 5i7e three hundred

pistoles than 5o to la6' F#ootnote ,hat 6ould Moliere ha7e said if

he had been li7in5 no6<G

%"*' I don4t care for that0 and I challen5e all the la6yers to say

anythin5 a5ainst me'

S$%' ou 6ill do as you please0 but in your place I 6ould a7oid a

la6suit'

%"*' I 6ill ne7er 5i7e t6o hundred pistoles'

S$%' %h< here is our man'

S$E&E I-';;%"*%&TE0 S$%PI&0 SIL9EST"E0 +dressed out as a bra7o+'

SIL' Scapin0 sho6 me that %r5ante 6ho is the father of cta7e'

S$%' ,hat for0 Sir>

SIL' I ha7e =ust been told that he 6ants to 5o to la6 6ith me0 and to

ha7e my sister4s marria5e annulled'

S$%' I don4t 8no6 if such is his intention0 but he 6on4t consent to

5i7e the t6o hundred pistoles you as8ed? he says it4s too much'

SIL' S4death< s4blood< If I can but find him0 I4ll ma8e mince;meat of him0 6ere I to be bro8en ali7e on the 6heel after6ards'

(%"*%&TE +hides0 tremblin50 behind+ S$%PI&')

S$%' Sir0 the father of cta7e is a bra7e man0 and perhaps he 6ill

not be afraid of you'

SIL' %h< 6ill he not> S4blood< s4death< If he 6ere here0 I 6ould in a

moment run my s6ord throu5h his body' (+Seein5+ %"*%&TE') ,ho isthat man>

S$%' He4s not the man0 Sir? he4s not the man'

SIL' Is he one of his friends>

S$%' &o0 Sir? on the contrary0 he4s his 5reatest enemy'

SIL' His 5reatest enemy>

S$%' es'

SIL' %h< Bounds

S$%' es0 yes? I assure you that it is so'

SIL' (+sha8in5+ %"*%&TE4S +hand rou5hly+)' Sha8e hands0

sha8e hands' I 5i7e you my 6ord0 I s6ear upon my honour0 by the s6ord

I 6ear0 by all the oaths I can ta8e0 that0 before the day is o7er0 Ishall ha7e deli7ered you of that rascally 8na7e0 of that scoundrel

%r5ante' Trust me'

S$%' ut0 Sir0 7iolent deeds are not allo6ed in this country'

SIL' I don4t care0 and I ha7e nothin5 to lose'

S$%' He 6ill certainly ta8e his precautions? he has relations0

friends0 ser7ants0 6ho 6ill ta8e his part a5ainst you'

SIL' lood and thunder< It is all I as80 all I as8' (+Dra6in5 his

s6ord+') %h< s4death< ah< s4blood< ,hy can I not meet him at this

7ery moment0 6ith all these relations and friends of his> If he 6ouldonly appear before me0 surrounded by a score of them< ,hy do they not

fall upon me0 arms in hand> (+Standin5 upon his 5uard+') ,hat<

you 7illains< you dare to attac8 me> &o60 s4death< ill and slay<

(+He lun5es out on all sides? as if he 6ere fi5htin5 many people atonce+') &o quarter? lay on' Thrust' #irm' %5ain' Eye and foot' %h<

8na7es< ah< rascals< ah< you shall ha7e a taste of it' I4ll 5i7e you

your fill' $ome on0 you rabble< come on' That4s 6hat you 6ant0 you

there' ou shall ha7e your fill of it0 I say' Stic8 to it0 you brutes? stic8 to it' &o60 then0 parry? no60 then0 you' (+Turnin5

to6ards+ %"*%&TE and S$%PI&') Parry this? parry' ou dra6 bac8>Stand firm0 man< S4death< ,hat< &e7er flinch0 I say'

S$%' Sir0 6e ha7e nothin5 to do 6ith it'

SIL' That 6ill teach you to trifle 6ith me'

S$E&E -';;%"*%&TE0 S$%PI&'

S$%' ,ell0 Sir0 you see ho6 many people are 8illed for t6o hundred

pistoles' &o6 I 6ish you a 5ood mornin5'

%"*' (+all tremblin5+)' Scapin'

S$%' ,hat do you say>

%"*' I 6ill 5i7e the t6o hundred pistoles'

S$%' I am 7ery 5lad of it0 for your sa8e'

%"*' Let us 5o to him? I ha7e them 6ith me'

S$%' etter 5i7e them to me' ou must not0 for your honour0 appear in

this business0 no6 that you ha7e passed for another? and0 besides0 I

should be afraid that he 6ould as8 you for more0 if he 8ne6 6ho you

are'

%"*' True? still I should be 5lad to see to 6hom I 5i7e my money'

S$%' Do you mistrust me then>

%"*' h no? but''''

S$%' :ounds< Sir? either I am a thief or an honest man? one or theother' Do you thin8 I 6ould decei7e you0 and that in all this I ha7e

any other interest at heart than yours and that of my master0 6hom

you 6ant to ta8e into your family> If I ha7e not all your confidence0

I 6ill ha7e no more to do 6ith all this0 and you can loo8 out for somebody else to 5et you out of the mess'

%"*' Here then'

S$%' &o0 Sir? do not trust your money to me' I 6ould rather you

trusted another 6ith your messa5e'

%"*' %h me< here0 ta8e it'

S$%' &o0 no0 I tell you? do not trust me' ,ho 8no6s if I do not 6ant

to steal your money from you>

%"*' Ta8e it0 I tell you0 and don4t force me to as8 you a5ain'Ho6e7er0 mind you ha7e an ac8no6led5ment from him'

S$%' Trust me? he hasn4t to do 6ith an idiot'

%"*' I 6ill 5o home and 6ait for you'

S$%' I shall be sure to 5o' (+%lone+') That one4s all ri5ht? no6

for the other' %h< here he is' They are sent one after the other to

fall into my net'

S$E&E -I';;*E"&TE0 S$%PI&'

S$%' (+affectin5 not to see+ *E"&TE)' Hea7en< unforeseenmisfortune< unfortunate father< Poor *eronte0 6hat 6ill you do>

*E"' (+aside+)' ,hat is he sayin5 there 6ith that doleful face>

S$%' $an no one tell me 6hereto find Mr' *eronte>

*E"' ,hat is the matter0 Scapin>

S$%' (+runnin5 about on the sta5e0 and still affectin5 not to see

or hear+ *E"&TE)' ,here could I meet him0 to tell him of thismisfortune>

*E"' (+stoppin5+ S$%PI&)' ,hat is the matter>

S$%' (+as before+)' In 7ain I run e7ery6here to meet him' I

cannot find him'

*E"' Here I am'

S$%' (+as before+)' He must ha7e hidden himself in some place

6hich nobody can 5uess'

*E"' (+stoppin5+ S$%PI& +a5ain+)' Ho$an4t you see me>

S$%' %h< Sir0 it is impossible to find you'

*E"' I ha7e been near you for the last half;hour' ,hat is it all

about>

S$%' Sir''''

*E"' ,ell<

S$%' our son0 Sir''''

*E"' ,ell< My son''''

S$%' Has met 6ith the stran5est misfortune you e7er heard of'

*E"' ,hat is it>

S$%' This afternoon I found him loo8in5 7ery sad about somethin56hich you had said to him0 and in 6hich you had 7ery improperly mi@ed

my name' ,hile tryin5 to dissipate his sorro60 6e 6ent and 6al8ed

about in the harbour' There0 amon5 other thin5s0 6as to be seen aTur8ish 5alley' % youn5 Tur80 6ith a 5entlemanly loo8 about him0

in7ited us to 5o in0 and held out his hand to us' ,e 6ent in' He 6as

most ci7il to us? 5a7e us some lunch0 6ith the most e@cellent fruit

and the best 6ine you ha7e e7er seen'

*E"' ,hat is there so sad about all this>

S$%' ,ait a little? it is comin5' ,hilst 6e 6ere eatin50 the 5alley

left the harbour0 and 6hen in the open sea0 the Tur8 made me 5o do6n

into a boat0 and sent me to tell you that unless you sent by me fi7ehundred cro6ns0 he 6ould ta8e your son prisoner to %l5iers'

*E"' ,hat< fi7e hundred cro6ns<

S$%' es0 Sir? and0 moreo7er0 he only 5a7e me t6o hours to find them

in'

*E"' %h< the scoundrel of a Tur8 to murder me in that fashion<

S$%' It is for you0 Sir0 to see quic8ly about the means of sa7in5

from sla7ery a son 6hom you lo7e so tenderly'

*E"' ,hat the deuce did he 6ant to 5o in that 5alley for> F#ootnote +ue diable allait;il faire dans cette 5alere>+ This sentence

has become established in the lan5ua5e 6ith the meanin50 C,hate7er

business had he there>CG

S$%' He had no idea of 6hat 6ould happen'

*E"' *o0 Scapin0 5o quic8ly0 and tell that Tur8 that I shall send the police after him'

S$%' The police in the open sea< %re you =o8in5>

*E"' ,hat the deuce did he 6ant to 5o in that 5alley for>

S$%' % cruel destiny 6ill sometimes lead people'

*E"' Listen0 Scapin? you must act in this the part of a faithful

ser7ant'

S$%' Ho60 Sir>

*E"' ou must 5o and tell that Tur8 that he must send me bac8 my son0

and that you 6ill ta8e his place until I ha7e found the sum he as8s'

S$%' %h< Sir? do you 8no6 6hat you are sayin5> and do you fancy that

that Tur8 6ill be foolish enou5h to recei7e a poor 6retch li8e me in

your son4s stead>

S$%' He could not foresee his misfortune' Ho6e7er0 Sir0 remember thathe has 5i7en me only t6o hours'

*E"' ou say that he as8s''''

S$%' #i7e hundred cro6ns'

*E"' #i7e hundred cro6ns< Has he no conscience>

S$%' %h< ah< $onscience in a Tur8<

*E"' Does he understand 6hat fi7e hundred cro6ns are>

S$%' es0 Sir0 he 8no6s that fi7e hundred cro6ns are one thousand

fi7e hundred francs' F#ootnote The +ecu+ stands usually for +petit ecu+0 6hich equalled three fran8s' C$ro6n0C employed in a

5eneral sense0 seems the only translation possible'G

*E"' Does the scoundrel thin8 that one thousand fi7e hundred francs

are to be found in the 5utter>

S$%' Such people 6ill ne7er listen to reason'

*E"' ut 6hat the deuce did he 6ant to 5o in that 5alley for>

S$%' %h< 6hat a 6aste of 6ords< Lea7e the 5alley alone? remember that

time presses0 and that you are runnin5 the ris8 of losin5 your sonfor e7er' %las< my poor master0 perhaps I shall ne7er see you a5ain0

and that at this 7ery moment0 6hilst I am spea8in5 to you0 they are

ta8in5 you a6ay to ma8e a sla7e of you in %l5iers< ut Hea7en is my6itness that I did all I could0 and that0 if you are not brou5ht

bac80 it is all o6in5 to the 6ant of lo7e of your father'

*E"' ,ait a minute0 Scapin? I 6ill 5o and fetch that sum of money'

S$%' e quic80 then0 for I am afraid of not bein5 in time'

*E"' ou said four hundred cro6ns? did you not>

S$%' &o0 fi7e hundred cro6ns'

*E"' #i7e hundred cro6ns<

S$%' es'

S$%' uite ri5ht0 but be quic8'

*E"' $ould he not ha7e chosen another 6al8>

S$%' It is true? but act promptly'

*E"' $ursed 5alley<

S$%' (+aside+) That 5alley stic8s in his throat'

*E"' Here0 Scapin? I had for5otten that I ha7e =ust recei7ed this sum

in 5old0 and I had no idea it 6ould so soon be 6renched from me'

(+Ta8in5 his purse out of his poc8et0 and ma8in5 as if he 6ere

5i7in5 it to+ S$%PI&') ut mind you tell that Tur8 that he is ascoundrel'

S$%' (+holdin5 out his hand+)' es'

*E"' (+as abo7e+)' %n infamous 6retch'

S$%' (+still holdin5 out his hand+)' es'

*E"' (+as abo7e+)' % man 6ithout conscience0 a thief'

S$%' Lea7e that to me'

*E"' (+as abo7e+)' That''''

S$%' %ll ri5ht'

*E"' (+as abo7e+)' %nd that0 if e7er I catch him0 he 6ill pay

for it'

S$%' es'

*E"' (+puttin5 bac8 the purse in his poc8et+)' *o0 5o quic8ly0and fetch my son'

S$%' (+runnin5 after him+)' Hallo< Sir'

*E"' ,ell>

S$%' %nd the money>

*E"' Did I not 5i7e it to you>

S$%' &o0 indeed0 you put it bac8 in pour poc8et'

*E"' %h< it is 5rief 6hich troubles my mind'

S$%' So I see'

*E"' ,hat the deuce did he 6ant to 5o in that 5alley for> %h< cursed

5alley< Scoundrel of a Tur8< May the de7il ta8e you<

S$%PI& (+alone+)' He can4t 5et o7er the fi7e hundred cro6ns I6rench from him? but he has not yet done 6ith me0 and I 6ill ma8e him

pay in a different money his imposture about me to his son'

S$E&E -II';$T%9E0 LE%&D"E0 S$%PI&'

$T' ,ell0 Scapin0 ha7e your plans been successful>

LE%' Ha7e you done anythin5 to6ards alle7iatin5 my sorro6>

S$%' (+to+ $T%9E)' Here are t6o hundred pistoles I ha7e 5otfrom your father'

$T' %h< ho6 happy you ma8e me'

S$%' (+to+ LE%&D"E)0 ut I could do nothin5 for you'

LE%' (+5oin5 a6ay+)' Then I must die0 Sir0 for I could not li7e

6ithout :erbinette'

S$%' Hallo< stop0 stop? my 5oodness0 ho6 quic8 you are<

LE%' ,hat can become of me>

S$%' There0 there0 I ha7e all you 6ant'

LE%' %h< you brin5 me bac8 to life a5ain'

S$%' ut I 5i7e it you only on one condition0 6hich is that you 6ill

allo6 me to re7en5e myself a little on your father for the tric8 he

has played me'

LE%' ou may do as you please'

S$%' ou promise it to me before 6itnesses>

LE%' es'

S$%' There0 ta8e these fi7e hundred cro6ns'

LE%' %h< I 6ill 5o at once and buy her 6hom I adore'

%$T III'

S$E&E I';;:E"I&ETTE0 H%$I&TH%0 S$%PI&0 SIL9EST"E'

SIL' es? your lo7ers ha7e decided that you should be to5ether0 and

6e are actin5 accordin5 to their orders'

H%' (+to+ :E"I&ETTE)' Such an order has nothin5 in it but

6hat is pleasant to me' I recei7e such a companion 6ith =oy0 and it

6ill not be my fault if the friendship 6hich e@ists bet6een those 6e

lo7e does not e@ist also bet6een us t6o'

:E"' I accept the offer0 and I am not one to dra6 bac8 6hen

friendship is as8ed of me'

S$%' %nd 6hen it is lo7e that is as8ed of you>

:E"' %h< lo7e is a different thin5' ne runs more ris80 and I feel

less determined'

S$%' ou are determined enou5h a5ainst my master0 and yet 6hat hehas =ust done for you ou5ht to 5i7e you confidence enou5h to respond

to his lo7e as you should'

:E"' %s yet I only half trust him0 and 6hat he has =ust done is not

sufficient to reassure me' I am of a happy disposition0 and am 7ery

fond of fun0 it is true' ut thou5h I lau5h0 I am serious about manythin5s? and your master 6ill find himself decei7ed if he thin8s that

it is sufficient for him to ha7e bou5ht me0 for me to be alto5ether

his' He 6ill ha7e to 5i7e somethin5 else besides money0 and for me

to ans6er to his lo7e as he 6ishes me0 he must 5i7e me his 6ord0

6ith an accompaniment of certain little ceremonies 6hich are thou5ht

indispensable'

S$%' It is so he understands this matter' He only 6ants you as his

6ife0 and I am not a man to ha7e mi@ed in this business if he had

meant anythin5 else'

:E"' I belie7e it since you say so? but I foresee certain

difficulties 6ith the father'

S$%' ,e shall find a 6ay of settlin5 that'

H%' (+to+ :E"I&ETTE)' The similarity of our fate ou5ht tostren5then the tie of friendship bet6een us' ,e are both sub=ect to

the same fears0 both e@posed to the same misfortune'

:E"' ou ha7e this ad7anta5e at least that you 8no6 6ho your parentsare0 and that0 sure of their help0 6hen you 6ish to ma8e them 8no6n0

you can secure your happiness by obtainin5 a consent to the marria5eyou ha7e contracted' ut I0 on the contrary0 ha7e no such hope to

fall bac8 upon0 and the position I am in is little calculated to

satisfy the 6ishes of a father 6hose 6hole care is money'

H%' That is true? but you ha7e this in your fa7our0 that the one

you lo7e is under no temptation of contractin5 another marria5e'

:E"' % chan5e in a lo7er4s heart is not 6hat 6e should fear the

most' ,e may =ustly rely on our o6n po6er to 8eep the conquest 6e

ha7e made? but 6hat I particularly dread is the po6er of thefathers? for 6e cannot e@pect to see them mo7ed by our merit'

H%' %las< ,hy must the course of true lo7e ne7er run smooth> Ho6s6eet it 6ould be to lo7e 6ith no lin8 6antin5 in those chains 6hich

unite t6o hearts'

S$%' Ho6 mista8en you are about this< Security in lo7e forms a 7eryunpleasant calm' $onstant happiness becomes 6earisome' ,e 6ant ups

and do6ns in life? and the difficulties 6hich 5enerally beset our

path in this 6orld re7i7e us0 and increase our sense of pleasure'

:E"' Do tell us0 Scapin0 all about that strata5em of yours0 6hich0 I

6as told0 is so 7ery amusin5? and ho6 you mana5ed to 5et some moneyout of your old miser' ou 8no6 that the trouble of tellin5 me

somethin5 amusin5 is not lost upon me0 and that I 6ell repay those

6ho ta8e that trouble by the pleasure it 5i7es me'

S$%' Sil7estre here 6ill do that as 6ell as I' I am nursin5 in my

heart a certain little scheme of re7en5e 6hich I mean to en=oy

thorou5hly'

SIL' ,hy do you rec8lessly en5a5e in enterprises that may brin5 you

into trouble>

S$%' I deli5ht in dan5erous enterprises'

SIL' %s I told you already0 you 6ould 5i7e up the idea you ha7e if

you 6ould listen to me'

S$%' I prefer listenin5 to myself'

SIL' ,hy the deuce do you en5a5e in such a business>

S$%' ,hy the deuce do you trouble yourself about it>

SIL' It is because I can see that you 6ill 6ithout necessity brin5 astorm of blo6s upon yourself'

S$%' %h0 6ell0 it 6ill be on my shoulders0 and not on yours'

SIL' It is true that you are master of your o6n shoulders0 and at

liberty to dispose of them as you please'

S$%' Such dan5ers ne7er stop me0 and I hate those fearful hearts

6hich0 by dint of thin8in5 of 6hat may happen0 ne7er underta8e

anythin5'

:E"' (+to+ S$%PI&)' ut 6e shall 6ant you'

S$%' h0 yes< but I shall soon be 6ith you a5ain' It shall ne7er be

said that a man has 6ith impunity put me into a position of

betrayin5 myself0 and of re7ealin5 secrets 6hich it 6ere better

should not be 8no6n'

S$E&E II';;*E"&TE0 S$%PI&'

*E"' ,ell< Scapin0 and ho6 ha7e 6e succeeded about my son4s

mischance>

S$%' our son is safe0 Sir? but you no6 run the 5reatest dan5er

ima5inable0 and I sincerely 6ish you 6ere safe in your house'

*E"' Ho6 is that>

S$%' ,hile I am spea8in5 to you0 there are people 6ho are loo8in5

out for you e7ery6here'

*E"' #or me>

S$%' es'

*E"' ut 6ho>

S$%' The brother of that youn5 5irl 6hom cta7e has married' He

thin8s that you are tryin5 to brea8 off that match0 because you

intend to 5i7e to your dau5hter the place she occupies in the heart

of cta7e? and he has resol7ed to 6rea8 his 7en5eance upon you' %llhis friends0 men of the s6ord li8e himself0 are loo8in5 out for you0

and are see8in5 you e7ery6here' I ha7e met 6ith scores here andthere0 soldiers of his company0 6ho question e7ery one they meet0

and occupy in companies all the thorou5hfares leadin5 to your house0

so that you cannot 5o home either to the ri5ht or the left 6ithoutfallin5 into their hands'

*E"' ,hat can I do0 my dear Scapin>

S$%' I am sure I don4t 8no60 Sir? it is an unpleasant business' I

tremble for you from head to foot and'''' ,ait a moment'

(S$%PI& +5oes to see in the bac8 of the sta5e if there is anybody

comin5+')

*E"' (+tremblin5+)' ,ell>

S$%' (+comin5 bac8+)' &o0 no? 4tis nothin5'

*E"' $ould you not find out some means of sa7in5 me>

S$%' I can indeed thin8 of one0 but I should run the ris8 of a sound beatin5'

*E"' %h< Scapin0 sho6 yourself a de7oted ser7ant' Do not forsa8e me0I pray you'

S$%' I 6ill do 6hat I can' I feel for you a tenderness 6hich renders

it impossible for me to lea7e you 6ithout help'

*E"' e sure that I 6ill re6ard you for it0 Scapin0 and I promise

you this coat of mine 6hen it is a little more 6orn'

S$%' ,ait a minute' I ha7e =ust thou5ht0 at the proper moment0 of

the 7ery thin5 to sa7e you' ou must 5et into this sac80 and I''''

*E"' (+thin8in5 he sees somebody+)' %h<

S$%' &o0 no0 no0 no? 4tis nobody' %s I 6as sayin50 you must 5et in

here0 and must be 7ery careful not to stir' I 6ill put you on my

shoulders0 and carry you li8e a bundle of somethin5 or other' I

shall thus be able to ta8e you throu5h your enemies0 and see yousafe into your house' ,hen there0 6e 6ill barricade the door and

send for help'

*E"' % 7ery 5ood idea'

S$%' The best possible' ou 6ill see' (+%side+) %h< you shall pay me for that lie'

*E"' ,hat>

S$%' I only say that your enemies 6ill be finely cau5ht' *et in

ri5ht to the bottom0 and0 abo7e all thin5s0 be careful not to sho6

yourself and not to mo7e0 6hate7er may happen'

*E"' ou may trust me to 8eep still'

S$%' Hide yourself? here comes one of the bullies< He is loo8in5

for you' (+%lterin5 his 7oice+') F#ootnote %ll the parts 6ithin

in7erted commas are supposed to be spo8en by the man Scapinis personatin5? the rest by himself'G C9atC (+To+ *E"&TE0 +in his ordinary tone+) Do not stir'

CPardi< I 7ill find him if he lied in de mittle ob de eartC(+To+ *E"&TE0 +in his natural tone+) Do not sho6 yourself'

CHo< you man 7id a sac8<C Sir< CI 6ill 5i7e thee a pound if thou

7ilt tell me 6here dis *eronte is'C ou are loo8in5 for Mr' *eronte>Ces0 dat I am'C %nd on 6hat business0 Sir> C#or 7at pusiness>C

es' CI 7ill0 pardi< trash him 7id one stic8 to dead'C h< Sir0 people

li8e him are not thrashed 6ith stic8s0 and he is not a man to betreated so' C9at< dis fob of a *eronte0 dis prute0 dis cat'C Mr' *eronte0

Sir0 is neither a fop0 a brute0 nor a cad? and you ou5ht0 if you please0

to spea8 differently' C9at< you spea8 so mi5hty 7it me>C I am

defendin50 as I ou5ht0 an honourable man 6ho is mali5ned' C%re

you one friend of dis *eronte>C es0 Sir0 I am' C%h0 ah< ou are

one friend of him0 dat is 5oot luc8<C (+eatin5 the sac8 se7eral

times 6ith the stic8+') CHere is 7at I 5i7e you for him'C (+$allin5out as if he recei7ed the beatin5+) %h< ah< ah< ah< Sir' %h< ah< Sir0

5ently< %h< pray' %h< ah< ah< CDere0 bear him dat from me' *oot;pye'C

%h< the 6retch' %h<'''ah<

*E"' (+loo8in5 out+)' %h< Scapin0 I can bear it no lon5er'

S$%' %h< Sir0 I am bruised all o7er0 and my shoulders are as sore as

can be'

*E"' Ho6< It 6as on mine he laid his stic8'

S$%' I be5 your pardon0 Sir0 it 6as on my bac8'

*E"' ,hat do you mean> I am sure I felt the blo6s0 and feel themstill'

S$%' &o0 I tell you? it 6as only the end of his stic8 that reached

your shoulders'

*E"' ou should ha7e 5one a little farther bac80 then0 to spare me0

and''''

S$%' (+pushin5+ *E"&TE4S +head bac8 into the sac8+)' Ta8ecare0 here is another man 6ho loo8s li8e a forei5ner' C#rient0 me

run li8e one Dutchman0 and me not fint all de tay dis treatful

*eronte'C Hide yourself 6ell' CTell me0 you0 Sir 5entleman0 if you please0 8no6 you not 7ere is dis *eronte0 7at me loo8 for>C &o0 Sir0

I do not 8no6 6here *eronte is' CTell me0 trutful0 me not 7ant much

7it him' nly to 5ife him one tosen plo6s 7id a stic80 and t6o or tree runs 7id a s6ort tro4 his shest'C I assure you0 Sir0 I do not

8no6 6here he is' CIt seems me I see sometin8 sha8e in dat sac8'C

E@cuse me0 Sir' CI pe shure dere is sometin8 or oder in dat sac8'C

&ot at all0 Sir' CMe should li8e to 5ife one plo6 of de s6ort in datsac8'C %h< Sir0 be6are0 pray you0 of doin5 so' CPut0 sho6 me ten 7at

to be dere>C *ently0 Sir' C,hy chently>C ou ha7e nothin5 to do 6ith

6hat I am carryin5' C%nd I0 put I 7ill see'C ou shall not see' C%h<7at triflin5'C It is some clothes of mine' CSho6 me tem0 I tell

you'C I 6ill not' Cou 7ill not>C &o' CI ma8e you feel this shtic8

upon de sholders'C I don4t care' C%h< you 7ill poast<C (+Stri8in5the sac80 and callin5 out as if he 6ere beaten+) h< oh< oh< h<

Sir' h< oh< C*oot;bye0 dat is one littel lesson teach you to spea8

so insolent'C %h< pla5ue the craBy =abberer< h<

*E"' (+loo8in5 out of the sac8+)' %h< all my bones are bro8en'

S$%' %h

S$%' (+pushin5 his head bac8 into the ba5+)' Ta8e care? I see

half a doBen soldiers comin5 to5ether' (+Imitatin5 the 7oices of

se7eral people+') C&o60 6e must disco7er *eronte? let us loo8 e7ery6here carefully' ,e must spare no trouble0 scour the to6n0

and not for5et one sin5le spot Let us search on all sides' ,hich

6ay shall 6e 5o> Let us 5o that 6ay' &o0 this' n the left' n the

ri5ht' &o? yes'C (+To+ *E"&TE +in his ordinary 7oice+) Hideyourself 6ell' C%h< here is his ser7ant' I say0 you rascal0 you

must tell us 6here your master is' Spea8' e quic8' %t once' Ma8e

haste' &o6'C %h< 5entlemen0 one moment' (*E"&TE +loo8s quietly

out of the ba50 and sees+ S$%PI&4S +tric8+') CIf you do nottell us at once 6here your master is0 6e 6ill sho6er a rain of blo6s

on your bac8'C I had rather suffer anythin5 than tell you 6here mymaster is' C9ery 6ell0 6e 6ill cud5el you soundly'C Do as you

please' Cou 6ant to be beaten0 then>C I 6ill ne7er betray my master'

C%h< you 6ill ha7e it;;there'C h<

(+%s he is 5oin5 to stri8e+0 *E"&TE +5ets out of the ba50

and+ S$%PI& +runs a6ay+')

*E"' (+alone+)' %h< infamous 6retch< ah I rascal< ah<

scoundrel< It is thus that you murder me>

S$E&E III';;:E"I&ETTE0 *E"&TE'

:E"' (+lau5hin50 6ithout seein5+ *E"&TE)' %h0 ah< I must really

come and breathe a little'

*E"' (+aside0 not seein5+ :E"I&ETTE)' %h< I 6ill ma8e you pay

for it'

:E"' (+not seein5+ *E"&TE)' %h0 ah0 ah0 ah< ,hat an amusin5

story< ,hat a 5ood dupe that old man is<

*E"' This is no matter for lau5hter? and you ha7e no business to

lau5h at it'

:E"' ,hy> ,hat do you mean0 Sir>

*E"' I mean to say that you ou5ht not to lau5h at me'

:E"' Lau5h at you>

*E"' es'

:E"' Ho6< ,ho is thin8in5 of lau5hin5 at you>

*E"' ,hy do you come and lau5h in my face>

:E"' This has nothin5 to do 6ith you' I am only lau5hin5 6ith myself at the remembrance of a story 6hich has =ust been told me' The most

amusin5 story in the 6orld' I don4t 8no6 if it is because I am

interested in the matter0 but I ne7er heard anythin5 so absurd as

the tric8 that has =ust been played by a son to his father to 5etsome money out of him'

*E"' y a son to his father to 5et some money out of him>

:E"' es? and if you are at all desirous of hearin5 ho6 it 6as done0I 6ill tell you the 6hole affair' I ha7e a natural lon5in5 for

impartin5 to others the funny thin5s I 8no6'

*E"' Pray0 tell me that story'

:E"' ,illin5ly' I shall not ris8 much by tellin5 it you0 for it is

an ad7enture 6hich is not li8ely to remain secret lon5' #ate placedme amon5 one of those bands of people 6ho are called 5ypsies0 and

6ho0 trampin5 from pro7ince to pro7ince0 tell you your fortune0 and

do many other thin5s besides' ,hen 6e came to this to6n0 I met ayoun5 man0 6ho0 on seein5 me0 fell in lo7e 6ith me' #rom that moment

he follo6ed me e7ery6here? and0 li8e all youn5 men0 he ima5ined that

he had but to spea8 and thin5s 6ould 5o on as he li8ed? but he met

6ith a pride 6hich forced him to thin8 t6ice' He spo8e of his lo7eto the people in 6hose po6er I 6as0 and found them ready to 5i7e me

up for a certain sum of money' ut the sad part of the business 6as

that my lo7er found himself e@actly in the same condition as mostyoun5 men of 5ood family0 that is0 6ithout any money at all' His

father0 althou5h rich0 is the 7eriest old s8inflint and 5reatest

miser you e7er heard of' ,ait a moment;;6hat is his name> I don4tremember it;;can4t you help me> $an4t you name some one in this to6n

6ho is 8no6n to be the most hard;fisted old miser in the place>

*E"' &o'

:E"' There is in his name some "on'''"onte''' r'''ronte'''&o'

*e'''*eronte' es0 *eronte0 that4s my miser4s name' I ha7e it no6?it is the old churl I mean' ,ell0 to come bac8 to our story' ur

people 6ished to lea7e this to6n to;day0 and my lo7er 6ould ha7e

lost me throu5h his lac8 of money if0 in order to 6rench some out of his father0 he had not made use of a cle7er ser7ant he has' %s for

that ser7ant4s name0 I remember it 7ery 6ell' His name is Scapin' He

is a most 6onderful man0 and deser7es the hi5hest praise'

*E"' (+aside+)' %h0 the 6retch<

:E"' ut =ust listen to the plan he adopted to ta8e in his dupe;;ah<ah< ah< ah< I can4t thin8 of it 6ithout lau5hin5 heartily;;ah< ah<

ah< He 6ent to that old scre6;;ah< ah< ah<;;and told him that 6hile

he 6as 6al8in5 about the harbour 6ith his son;;ah< ah<;;they noticed

a Tur8ish 5alley? that a youn5 Tur8 had in7ited them to come in andsee it? that he had 5i7en them some lunch;;ah< ah<;;and that0 6hile

they 6ere at table0 the 5alley had 5one into the open sea? that theTur8 had sent him alone bac80 6ith the e@press order to say to him

that0 unless he sent him fi7e hundred cro6ns0 he 6ould ta8e his son

to be a sla7e in %l5iers;;ah0 ah0 ah< ou may ima5ine our miser0 our stin5y old curmud5eon0 in the 5reatest an5uish0 stru55lin5 bet6een

his lo7e for his son and his lo7e for his money' Those fi7e hundred

cro6ns that are as8ed of him are fi7e hundred da55er;thrusts;;ah<

ah< ah< ah< He can4t brin5 his mind to tear out0 as it 6ere0 thissum from his heart0 and his an5uish ma8es him thin8 of the most

ridiculous means to find money for his son4s ransom;;ah< ah< ah< He

6ants to send the police into the open sea after the Tur84s 5alley;;ah< ah< ah< He as8s his ser7ant to ta8e the place of his son till he

has found the money to pay for him;;money he has no intention of

5i7in5;;ah< ah< ah< He yields up0 to ma8e the fi7e hundred cro6ns0three or four old suits 6hich are not 6orth thirty;;ah< ah< ah< The

ser7ant sho6s him each time ho6 absurd is 6hat he proposes0 and each

reflection of the old fello6 is accompanied by an a5onisin50 Cut

6hat the deuce did he 6ant to 5o in that 5alley for> %h< cursed5alley' %h< scoundrel of a Tur8<C %t last0 after many hesitations0

after ha7in5 si5hed and 5roaned for a lon5 time'''ut it seems to me

that my story does not ma8e you lau5h? 6hat do you say to it>

*E"' ,hat I say> That the youn5 man is a scoundrel;;a 5ood;for;nothin5

fello6;;6ho 6ill be punished by his father for the tric8 he has played him?that the 5ypsy 5irl is a bold0 impudent hussy to come and insult a man

of honour0 6ho 6ill 5i7e her 6hat she deser7es for comin5 here to

debauch the sons of 5ood families? and that the ser7ant is an infamous

6retch0 6hom *eronte 6ill ta8e care to ha7e hun5 before to;morro6 is

o7er'

S$E&E I9';;:E"I&ETTE0 SIL9EST"E'

SIL' ,here are you runnin5 a6ay to> Do you 8no6 that the man you

6ere spea8in5 to is your lo7er4s father>

:E"' I ha7e =ust be5un to suspect that it 6as so? and I related to

him his o6n story 6ithout 8no6in5 6ho he 6as'

SIL' ,hat do you mean by his story>

:E"' es? I 6as so full of that story that I lon5ed to tell it to

somebody' ut 6hat does it matter> So much the 6orse for him' I donot see that thin5s can be made either better or 6orse'

SIL' ou must ha7e been in a 5reat hurry to chatter? and it is

indiscretion0 indeed0 not to 8eep silent on your o6n affairs'

:E"' h< he 6ould ha7e heard it from somebody else'

S$E&E 9';;%"*%&TE0 :E"I&ETTE0 SIL9EST"E'

%"*' (+behind the scenes+)' Hullo< Sil7estre'

SIL' (+to+ :E"I&ETTE)' *o in there? my master is callin5 me'

S$E&E 9I';;%"*%&TE0 SIL9EST"E'

%"*' So you a5reed0 you rascals? you a5reed;;Scapin0 you0 and my son;;to cheat me out of my money? and you thin8 that I am 5oin5 to bear

it patiently>

SIL' !pon my 6ord0 Sir0 if Scapin is decei7in5 you0 it is none of my

doin5' I assure you that I ha7e nothin5 6hate7er to do 6ith it'

%"*' ,e shall see0 you rascal< 6e shall see? and I am not 5oin5 to be

made a fool of for nothin5'

S$E&E 9II';*E"&TE0 %"*%&TE0 SIL9EST"E'

*E"' %h< Mr' %r5ante0 you see me in the 5reatest trouble'

%"*' %nd I am in the 5reatest sorro6'

*E"' This rascal0 Scapin0 has 5ot fi7e hundred cro6ns out of me'

%"*' es0 and this same rascal0 Scapin0 t6o hundred pistoles out of

me'

*E"' He 6as not satisfied 6ith 5ettin5 those fi7e hundred cro6ns0 buttreated me besides in a manner I am ashamed to spea8 of' ut he;;

shall pay me for it'

%"*' I shall ha7e him punished for the tric8 he has played me'

*E"' %nd I mean to ma8e an e@ample of him'

SIL' (+aside+)' May Hea7en 5rant that I do not catch my share of

all this<

*E"' ut0 Mr' %r5ante0 this is not all? and misfortunes0 as you 8no60

ne7er come alone' I 6as loo8in5 for6ard to the happiness of to;dayseein5 my dau5hter0 6ho 6as e7erythin5 to me? and I ha7e =ust heard

that she left Tarentum a lon5 6hile since? and there is e7ery reason

to suppose that the ship 6as 6rec8ed0 and that she is lost to me for e7er'

%"*' ut 6hy did you 8eep her in Tarentum0 instead of en=oyin5 the

happiness of ha7in5 her 6ith you>

*E"' I had my reasons for it? some family interests forced me till

no6 to 8eep my second marria5e secret' ut 6hat do I see>

S$E&E 9III';;%"*%&TE0 *E"&TE0 &E"I&E0 SIL9EST"E'

*E"' ,hat< you here0 &erine>

&E"' (+on her 8nees before+ *E"&TE)' %h< Mr' Pandolphe0 ho6''''

*E"' $all me *eronte0 and do not use the other name any more' The

reasons 6hich forced me to ta8e it at Tarentum e@ist no lon5er'

&E"' %las< 6hat sorro6 that chan5e of name has caused us? 6hat

troubles and difficulties in tryin5 to find you out<

*E"' %nd 6here are my dau5hter and her mother>

&E"' our dau5hter0 Sir0 is not far from here? but before I 5o to

fetch her0 I must as8 you to for5i7e me for ha7in5 married her0 because of the forsa8en state 6e found oursel7es in0 6hen 6e had no

lon5er any hope of meetin5 you'

*E"' My dau5hter is married>

&E"' es0 Sir'

*E"' %nd to 6hom>

&E"' To a youn5 man0 called cta7e0 the son of a certain Mr' %r5ante'

*E"' Hea7en<

%"*' ,hat an e@traordinary coincidence'

*E"' Ta8e us quic8ly 6here she is'

&E"' ou ha7e but to come into this house'

*E"' *o in first? follo6 me0 follo6 me0 Mr' %r5ante'

SIL' (alone)' ,ell0 this is a stran5e affair'

S$E&E I-';;S$%PI&0 SIL9EST"E'

S$%' ,ell0 Sil7estre0 6hat are our people doin5>

SIL' I ha7e t6o thin5s to tell you' ne is that cta7e is all ri5ht?

our Hyacintha is0 it seems0 the dau5hter of *eronte0 and chance has

brou5ht to pass 6hat the 6isdom of the fathers had decided' The



other0 that the old men threaten you 6ith the 5reatest punishments;;

particularly Mr' *eronte'

S$%' h0 that4s nothin5' Threats ha7e ne7er done me any harm as yet?

they are but clouds 6hich pass a6ay far abo7e our heads'

SIL' ou had better ta8e care' The sons may 5et reconciled to their

fathers0 and lea7e you in the lurch'

S$%' Lea7e that to me' I shall find the means of soothin5 their

an5er0 and''''

SIL' *o a6ay? I see them comin5'

S$E&E -';;*E"&TE0 %"*%&TE0 H%$I&TH%0 :E"I&ETTE0 &E"I&E0

SIL9EST"E'

*E"' $ome0 my dau5hter? come to my house' My happiness 6ould be

perfect if your mother had been 6ith you'

%"*' Here is cta7e comin5 =ust at the ri5ht time'

S$E&E -I';;%"*%&TE0 *E"&TE0 $T%9E0 H%$I&TH%0 :E"I&ETTE0 &E"I&E0

SIL9EST"E'

%"*' $ome0 my son0 come and re=oice 6ith us about the happiness of

your marria5e' Hea7en''''

$T' &o0 father0 all your proposals for marria5e are useless' I must be open 6ith you0 and you ha7e been told ho6 I am en5a5ed'

%"*' es? but 6hat you do not 8no6''''

$T' I 8no6 all I care to 8no6'

%"*' I mean to say that the dau5hter of Mr' *eronte''''

$T' The dau5hter of Mr' *eronte 6ill ne7er be anythin5 to me'

*E"' It is she 6ho''''

$T' (+to+ *E"&TE)' ou need not 5o on0 Sir? I hope you 6illfor5i7e me0 but I shall abide by my resolution'

SIL' (+to+ $T%9E)' Listen''''

$T' e silent? I 6ill listen to nothin5'

%"*' (+to+ $T%9E)' our 6ife''''

$T' &o0 father0 I 6ould rather die than lose my dear Hyacintha

(+crossin5 the theatre0 and placin5 himself by+ H%$I&TH%)' es0all you 6ould do is useless? this is the one to 6hom my heart is

en5a5ed' I 6ill ha7e no other 6ife'

%"*' ,ell< she it is 6hom 6e 5i7e you' ,hat a madcap you are ne7er tolisten to anythin5 but your o6n foolish 6him'

H%' (+sho6in5+ *E"&TE)' es0 cta7e0 this is my father 6hom I

ha7e found a5ain0 and all our troubles are o7er'

*E"' Let us 5o home? 6e shall tal8 more comfortably at home'

H%' (+sho6in5+ :E"I&ETTE)' %h< father0 I be5 of you the fa7our

not to part me from this charmin5 youn5 lady' She has noblequalities0 6hich 6ill be sure to ma8e you li8e her 6hen you 8no6 her'

*E"' ,hat< do you 6ish me to ta8e to my house a 5irl 6ith 6hom your brother is in lo7e0 and 6ho told me to my face so many insultin5

thin5s>

:E"' Pray for5i7e me0 Sir? I should not ha7e spo8en in that 6ay if I

had 8no6n 6ho you 6ere0 and I only 8ne6 you by reputation'

*E"' y reputation? 6hat do you mean>

H%' #ather0 I can ans6er for it that she is most 7irtuous0 and that

the lo7e my brother has for her is pure'

*E"' It is all 7ery 6ell' ou 6ould try no6 to persuade me to marry

my son to her0 a stran5er0 a street;5irl<

S$E&E -II';%"*%&TE0 *E"&TE0 LE%&D"E0 $T%9E0 H%$I&TH%0

:E"I&ETTE0

&E"I&E0 SIL9EST"E'

LE%' My father0 you must no lon5er say that I lo7e a stran5er 6ithout

birth or 6ealth' Those from 6hom I bou5ht her ha7e =ust told me thatshe belon5s to an honest family in this to6n' They stole her a6ay

6hen she 6as four years old0 and here is a bracelet 6hich they 5a7e

me0 and 6hich 6ill help me to disco7er her family'

%"*' %h< To =ud5e by this bracelet0 this is my dau5hter 6hom I lost

6hen she 6as four years old'

*E"' our dau5hter>

%"*' es0 I see she is my dau5hter' I 8no6 all her features a5ain' My

dear child<

*E"' h< 6hat 6onderful e7ents<

S$E&E -III';;%"*%&TE0 *E"&TE0 LE%&D"E0 $T%9E0 H%$I&TH%0

:E"I&ETTE0 &E"I&E0 SIL9EST"E0 $%"LE'

$%"' %h< 5entlemen0 a most sad accident has =ust ta8en place'

*E"' ,hat is it>

$%"' Poor Scapin''''

*E"' Is a rascal 6hom I shall see hun5'

$%"' %las< Sir0 you 6ill not ha7e that trouble' %s he 6as passin5

near a buildin50 a bric8layer4s hammer fell on his head and bro8e hiss8ull0 lea7in5 his brain e@posed' He is dyin50 and he has as8ed to be

brou5ht in here to spea8 to you before he dies'

S$E&E -I9';;%"*%&TE0 *E"&TE0 LE%&D"E0 $T%9E0 H%$I&TH%0

:E"I&ETTE0

&E"I&E' SIL9EST"E0 $%"LE0 S$%PI&'

S$%' (+brou5ht in by some men0 his head 6rapped up0 as if he 6ere

6ounded+)' h0 oh< 5entlemen0 you see me'''' h< ou see me in a

sad state' h< I 6ould not die 6ithout comin5 to as8 for5i7enessof all those I may ha7e offended' h< es0 5entlemen0 before I 5i7e

up the 5host0 I beseech you to for5i7e me all I ha7e done amiss0 and

particularly Mr' %r5ante and Mr' *eronte' h<

%"*' I for5i7e you? die in peace0 Scapin'

S$%' (+to+ *E"&TE)' It is you0 Sir0 I ha7e offended the most0

because of the beatin5 6ith the cud5el 6hich I''''

*E"' Lea7e that alone'

S$%' I feel in dyin5 an inconcei7able 5rief for the beatin5 6hich

I''''

*E"' %h me< be silent'

S$%' That unfortunate beatin5 that I 5a7e''''

*E"' e silent0 I tell you? I for5i7e you e7erythin5'

S$%' %las< ho6 5ood you are' ut is it really 6ith all your heart

that you for5i7e me the beatin5 6hich I'''>

*E"' es0 yes? don4t mention it' I for5i7e you e7erythin5' ou are

punished'

S$%' %h< Sir0 ho6 much better I feel for your 8ind 6ords'

*E"' es0 I for5i7e you? but on one condition0 that you die'

S$%' Ho6< Sir>

*E"' I retract my 6ords if you reco7er'

S$%' h< oh< all my pains are comin5 hac8'

%"*' Mr' *eronte0 let us for5i7e him 6ithout any condition0 for 6e

are all so happy'

*E"' ,ell0 be it so'

%"*' Let us 5o to supper0 and tal8 of our happiness'



S$%' %nd you0 ta8e me to the end of the table? it is there I 6ill

a6ait death'

ac8 to #ull oo8s

the impostures of scapin

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