smithy telegraph july 2008

The Smithy Telegraph

www.smith-sons.com THE BEST OF YESTERDAY, TODAY & YOUR TOMORROW

Edition 2 July 2008

The Smithy Telegraph Welcome to the second edition of the bi-monthly ‘Smithy Telegraph’!

Once again, the Smithy Telegraph brings you all the latest news that is happening in Smith

& Sons – Australia & New Zealand’s newest and most exciting renovation company!

From the Director…

Quotes of the Quarter –

“Inspect what you expect or you will lose your respect!” Another quote by the oldest and wisest Master (the Pope), Steve Jensen! You may have seen him in

Sydney last week at World Youth Week.

“Once you surrender to your vision, success begins to chase you.” Words of inspiration from Sydney’s North Shore – Mark Mcnulty.

From the Director…

Where has the last 2 months gone??? That is what I have been asking

myself anyway and I am sure you feel the same. Winter is here but you

only have to blink and it will be over, maybe in the South Island you

have to blink a few more times. Things are still progressing well and

the last 2 months have seen us opening up more offices in both

countries and appointing more builders to partner with us. So each

week the 'Smithy clan' continues to grow more and more as builder's

realise the strengths and advantages of joining our team and we seem

to be attracting high quality award winning builders too. The last 2 months I have been to Sydney,

Melbourne, Adelaide, North and South Islands of NZ and it is great to see the teams in each area

starting to increase. Until I see you again, it is ‘heads down’ time for all of us.

Corey



Ben & Ari Passey – Maroochydore, Qld

David Fridd & Barbara Gallen – Timaru, NZ

Reon & Sandra Taylor – Cambridge, NZ

Introducing Our First ‘Six-Pack’ of Franchise Owners….



Mick & Liz Demnar – Caloundra, Qld

Mike & Jennie Edwards – Taupo, NZ

Charlie Robinson – Hamilton, NZ

More coming soon… watch this space…



Our Master Offices…

Qld – Mid Coast Sydney South

NZ North Island NZ South Island

South Australia

Corey & Leigh’s Office



And here’s all the serious stuff that goes on…



Just hope you never get anyone like this working for you……………

These are purported to be from actual federal employee performance evaluations:

1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and started to dig."

2. "I would not allow this employee to breed."

3. "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't be."

4. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap."

5. "When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet."

6. "He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle."

7. "This young lady has delusions of adequacy."

8. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."

9. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."

10. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better."

11. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together."

12. "A gross ignoramus --- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus."

13. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier."

14. "I would like to go hunting with him sometime."

15. "He's been working with glue too much."

16. "He would argue with a signpost."

17. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."

18. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."

19. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one."

20. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on."

21. "A prime candidate for natural de-selection."

22. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."

23. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming."

24. "He's got two brains, one is lost and the other is out looking for it."

25. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week."

26. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."

27. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean."

28. "It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm."

29. "One neuron short of a synapse.

30. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled."

31. "Takes him 2 hours to watch '60-Minutes'

Well that’s all this time folks – look forward to seeing you next time in

the Smithy Telegraph!

smithy telegraph july 2008

Documents

smithy telegraph welcome

best of yesterday

smithy clan

bimonthly smithy telegraph

south islands of nz

tomorrow edition

nz charlie robinson

world youth week