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Mindful Parenting: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater Cultivating greater awareness of self, awareness of self, children, and your children, and your relationship with them relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 June 5, 2010 Rebecca C. Cortes Rebecca C. Cortes Yaffa Maritz Yaffa Maritz

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Page 1: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Mindful Parenting: Cultivating Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, greater awareness of self, children,

and your relationship with themand your relationship with them

UW Early Learning ConferenceUW Early Learning ConferenceJune 5, 2010June 5, 2010

Rebecca C. CortesRebecca C. CortesYaffa MaritzYaffa Maritz

Page 2: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Workshop GoalsWorkshop Goals

• Background on mindfulness

• Awareness of self

• Awareness of children

• Awareness of relationships with children

• Background on mindfulness

• Awareness of self

• Awareness of children

• Awareness of relationships with children

Page 3: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

For more information please contact Dr. Patricia Jennings, [email protected] or 845.424.4800.

Page 4: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

IntentionIntention

Page 5: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

IntentionIntention

• Intention as different from goals

• State your intention to the person sitting next to you

Examples: Listen Be open to new ideas Participate Be non-judgmental Be present

• Intention as different from goals

• State your intention to the person sitting next to you

Examples: Listen Be open to new ideas Participate Be non-judgmental Be present

Page 6: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

BreathingBreathing

MindMind BodyBodyBreathingBreathing

Page 7: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Mindfulness is . . .Mindfulness is . . .

Paying attention in a particular way :

• With intention, on purpose

• With open-hearted, non-judgmental awareness

• In the present moment

Paying attention in a particular way :

• With intention, on purpose

• With open-hearted, non-judgmental awareness

• In the present moment

“Everyday Blessings” by Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn, 1997

Page 8: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Brief Background on MindfulnessBrief Background on Mindfulness

• Buddhism

• Judaism

• Islam

• Christianity

• Indigenous cultures

• Education: Teachers, students, incorporated in social emotional learning curricula, such as PATHS® and MindUP™

• Medicine: psoriasis, high blood pressure, chronic pain,

• Psychology: anxiety, depression, substance abuse

• Buddhism

• Judaism

• Islam

• Christianity

• Indigenous cultures

• Education: Teachers, students, incorporated in social emotional learning curricula, such as PATHS® and MindUP™

• Medicine: psoriasis, high blood pressure, chronic pain,

• Psychology: anxiety, depression, substance abuse

Page 9: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

The Mind-Body ConnectionThe Mind-Body Connection

MindMind BodyBodyHealth, Calmness, Health, Calmness,

CompassionCompassion

Page 10: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Mindfulness is . . .Mindfulness is . . .

• Not a relaxation technique, although one can feel relaxed when being mindful

• Not an activity that takes up extra time during the day, rather it is a way of sensing time differently (chronos vs. kairos time)

• Either a set of skills, or a “quality of consciousness” or a way of being that begins with the self

• Not a relaxation technique, although one can feel relaxed when being mindful

• Not an activity that takes up extra time during the day, rather it is a way of sensing time differently (chronos vs. kairos time)

• Either a set of skills, or a “quality of consciousness” or a way of being that begins with the self

Page 11: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Mindful Parenting DimensionsMindful Parenting Dimensions

• Listening with full attention

• Nonjudgmental acceptance of self and child

• Emotional awareness of self and child

• Self-regulation in the parenting relationship

• Compassion for self and child

Duncan, Coatsworth, & Greenberg (2009)

• Listening with full attention

• Nonjudgmental acceptance of self and child

• Emotional awareness of self and child

• Self-regulation in the parenting relationship

• Compassion for self and child

Duncan, Coatsworth, & Greenberg (2009)

Page 12: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

The Parenting TreeThe Parenting Tree

Inner Resources

Presence (self)

Relationships

Page 13: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Mindful Listening ActivityMindful Listening Activity

Page 14: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Parenting: Discipline from the HeartParenting: Discipline from the Heart

Our mission is to empower parents of children under 5 years old to become more effective parents. The research based curriculums promote strong family bonds and sets the foundation for long lasting emotional health.

Our mission is to empower parents of children under 5 years old to become more effective parents. The research based curriculums promote strong family bonds and sets the foundation for long lasting emotional health.

Page 15: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Parenting: Discipline from the HeartParenting: Discipline from the Heart

Mindful parenting is a way of approaching all experiences with an open mind and open heart (COAL). Through mindfulness, parents:

•Develop self awareness

•Become attuned with their children

•Learn more effective ways to communicate

•Create greater capacity to help children regulate their emotions to nurture resiliency and well-being in their children

Mindful parenting is a way of approaching all experiences with an open mind and open heart (COAL). Through mindfulness, parents:

•Develop self awareness

•Become attuned with their children

•Learn more effective ways to communicate

•Create greater capacity to help children regulate their emotions to nurture resiliency and well-being in their children

Page 16: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Parenting: Discipline from the HeartParenting: Discipline from the Heart

•Presence – The ability to observe your internal self (form healthy relationship with oneself)

•Attunement –Focused attention on the internal world of the other

•Resonance – Feeling felt

•Presence – The ability to observe your internal self (form healthy relationship with oneself)

•Attunement –Focused attention on the internal world of the other

•Resonance – Feeling felt

Page 17: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

““Mindsight”Mindsight”

“. . . the ability for the human mind to see itself. It is a powerful lens through which we can understand our inner lives with more clarity, transform the brain and enhance our relationships with others.”

Dr. Dan SiegelExecutive DirectorMindsight Institute

“. . . the ability for the human mind to see itself. It is a powerful lens through which we can understand our inner lives with more clarity, transform the brain and enhance our relationships with others.”

Dr. Dan SiegelExecutive DirectorMindsight Institute

Page 18: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

A mindful story . . .A mindful story . . .

Page 19: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Ways to Be Mindful Ways to Be Mindful in Our Daily Lifein Our Daily Life

•Short mindfulness practice first thing in the morning

•Use breathing on your way to work, shopping, dropping off children at daycare or school

•Set intention for the day in the car or walking into work setting or at home

•Use breathing to address tension

•Bring mindfulness to everyday tasks

•Short mindfulness practice first thing in the morning

•Use breathing on your way to work, shopping, dropping off children at daycare or school

•Set intention for the day in the car or walking into work setting or at home

•Use breathing to address tension

•Bring mindfulness to everyday tasks

Page 20: Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C

Mindfulness ResourcesMindfulness Resources•http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/

•http://www.umassmed.edu/cfm/home/index.aspx

•http://www.parentmindfully.com/

•http://www.mindandlife.org/

•www.garrisoninstitute.org/

•http://drdansiegel.com/

•http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/

•http://www.umassmed.edu/cfm/home/index.aspx

•http://www.parentmindfully.com/

•http://www.mindandlife.org/

•www.garrisoninstitute.org/

•http://drdansiegel.com/