lancaster bride

8/11/2019 Lancaster Bride

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Lancaster

SEPTEMBER 2014 | JANUARY 2015 A PUBLICATION OF LANCASTER NEWSPAPERS


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LANCASTER BRIDE

September 2014 January 2015

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LANCASTER BRIDE


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Nine months (or longer) before theweddingSet a date. Decide on the size and formality

of the event. If you plan to be married in achurch or temple, talk with your clergy toconfirm the date.

Prepare a budget for your wedding, reception,and any other wedding-related parties.

Talk with reputable bridal planners. If you havea full-time job or just need a little extra help,a talented wedding consultant could be yoursaving grace. Though they arent inexpensive,neither are the costly mistakes that their

experience may prevent you from making.Determine the time and place of your wedding

and reception.

Draw up your guest list. Ask your fiancsfamily to do the same.

Ask family and/or friends to be in yourwedding party. Be sure to be sensitive to anyfinancial limitations they may have.

Seek out and buy a wedding gownand accessories.

Shop for bridesmaids dresses. If possible,arrange for attendants to see your favoritesand give you feedback. This is a nice gesturesince they traditionally pay for the dresses

and shoes you select.

Interview photographers, videographers,florists, musicians, caterers, and bakers.(You may want to create files for each categoryto keep track of bids, contracts, photos oftheir work, etc.)

Six to nine months beforeHave your fianc ask his family and/or friends

to be in the wedding party.

Shop for wedding invitations as well aspersonal stationery for thank-you notes andat-home cards (if youll be using them). Makesure to order extra invitation envelopes sinceyoull undoubtedly make a few addressingmistakes. You may also choose to order extrainvitations to keep as mementos.

Decide on your fiancs wedding attire and thatof his best man, groomsmen, ushers, yourfather, and his father.

Ask your mother and your fiancs mother toshop for their dresses. Traditionally, the bridesmother has first choice of style and color andyour grooms mother would follow that lead.However, you may decide to provide each withthe predominant colors and a sense of theformality of your wedding and let them makeindependent decisions.

Start planning your honeymoon. Read yourSunday newspapers travel section, send forbrochures, and consult with recommendedtravel agents. Also get tips from well-traveledfriends and family.

Decide on the florist, caterer, bakery,photographer, videographer, and theentertainment. Get written contracts.

Four to six months beforeRegister with a bridal gift registry. Department

stores have the largest selection, but a growingnumber of specialty stores, museums, andmail-order companies offer bridal registryservices, too. Check out the possibilities andremember you can register in more than oneplace. Many registry consultants will provideinvaluable assistance with decisions regardingchina patterns, silverware, appliances, andeven home furnishings.

Reserve your rehearsal dinner location. Plan arehearsal dinner that includes both of yourimmediate families, the wedding party andtheir spouses or dates, and out-of-town guests.

Book hotel accommodations for yourattendants who live out of town, or arrange tohave family or friends put them up.

At the same time, book a block of rooms at a

hotel for other out-of-town guests. Ask aboutgroup discounts and weekend packages.

Begin fittings for your wedding gown andbridesmaids dresses.

Select a wedding ring for your groom. Have itsized (if necessary) and engraved.

Three months beforePrepare, or ask a friend or family member to

help out with easy-to-read maps (especially ifyou dont live in the city where your weddingwill take place) explaining how to get to hotels,as well as wedding and reception sites. You mayalso want to include other information such asfun sight-seeing, shopping, and restaurants.Include with invitations to out-of-town guests.

Address invitations and announcements. Takecompleted examples (make sure invitations arealready stuffed with response cards, maps,hotel info, etc.) to the post office to find outwhat denomination of stamp you need.

A choice of designs may be available.Buy your favorite and stamp everything sothe invitations are ready to send out six toeight weeks before the wedding.

Meet with your caterer to talk about menusand other relevant details, including servicecharges, liquor costs, and waiters andbartenders fees (some of these may beincluded in the cost of your reception siteinstead). Give the caterer a rough estimate ofthe number of guests you expect. Be sure to geverything in writing.

Take swatches of your dress and those of youbridesmaids (as well as those of both motherif possible) to your florist. This will helpboth of you visualize wonderful andcomplementary f lowers for the weddingceremony and reception.

Firm up your honeymoon plans. Though thistraditionally the grooms job, if you areenthusiastic about travel, you might want tocontribute your two cents worth. In general,planning ahead means getting the bestpossible prices for everything from airfaresto hotel reservations.

Have your groom hire a limousine or othertransportation (a horse-drawn carriage is aromantic option in some places) to take thetwo of you from the wedding to the receptionRemember: Get a contract.

Compile a list of people youd like invited toshowers in your honor.

Shop for clothing for young members of yourbridal party (flower girls and ring bearers). Atheir parents for help with sizes and fittings.

Shop for gifts for your attendants. Giveyourself ample time to find things that arelovely and personal to show how much theirfriendship means to you. Shopping ahead alsleaves time for any engraving you may decideto have done. Have your fianc begin shoppinfor his attendants gifts, too.

Shop for a going-away outfit and clothing foryour trousseau.

If you are renting tableware, furniture, tents,etc., make those arrangements now.

Arrange with your photographer to have aformal bridal portrait taken six to eight weekbefore your wedding. You may also decideto have a formal portrait taken of you withyour groom.

Make appointments with a great hairstylist fthe day your formal portrait is taken and theday of or day before your wedding. If you likealso make an appointment to have a manicuror makeup application.

Timetable and ChecklistTHE BRIDES CHECKLIST


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Two months beforeCall city hall for information on how to get

a marriage license. Generally, couples mustapply for this no more than a month beforetheir wedding day.

Mail wedding invitations.

Buy a journal for recording gifts you receive.Make sure to record the giver, the address,the gift or gifts, when you received it, and anycomments that will help you personalize thethank-you note, which you should send outas promptly as possible.

Plan a brunch or other activity for out-of-townguests for the day after the wedding.This is an optional but lovely way to enda wedding weekend and a warm way to showyour appreciation for their making a special,costly trip to celebrate your wedding.

Arrange a time and place fora bridesmaids luncheon.

Complete all shopping for a going-away outfitand your trousseau.

Meet with and discuss all specifics with themusicians involved with your wedding: churchorganists, pianists, harpists, bands, stringquartets, or deejays. Talk about every little

detail, especially with reception music: volume,type of music, the first dance song youd likeplayed, and any other sentimental favorites(either yours or someone elses). Also spell outthe duration of band or deejay breaks, fees, andthe possibility of overtime play.

Have a formal bridal portrait taken (some withyour groom, too, if you choose).

Send a bridal portrait and announcementto newspapers.

If you want to personalize your ceremony,firm up your ideas and make an appointmentto discuss them with the officiant.

Get together all necessary birth or baptismal

certificates, passports, and other documentsyou may need for your marriage license.

Offer to help your groom and his parentsselect a site for the rehearsal dinner(especially if they are coming fromanother city to your hometown).

Two to four weeks beforeSet the wedding rehearsal and firm up

rehearsal dinner plans. Inform the bridal party,close family and friends, as well as any otherout-of-town guests, of wedding rehearsal andrehearsal dinner times and places.

Get your wedding license and put it in a safeplace. (Your officiant must sign it or thewedding will not be valid.)

Have a final fitting of your gown.

Double-check the clothes of the members ofyour wedding party.

Keep good track of invitation responses.

Buy a pretty wedding guest book.

Firm up plans with your photographer forformal wedding shots of the bridal party,as well as candid shots to be taken atthe reception.

Firm up plans for videography of your weddingceremony and the reception.

Give your caterer a solid estimate of thenumber of guests you expect to attend thereception and make final decisions regardingthe menu. Your caterer can then give you awritten cost-per-person breakdown of foodand drink costs. This should be an extremelydetailed account of exactly what will be servedand in what quantities.

If youre giving your groom a traditional gift,select one and wrap it at once you wonthave time later.

Talk with your florist to make sure all isgoing as scheduled. Double-check addressesand times of delivery to wedding andreception sites.

Double-check your transportation plans: time,place, size, and number of vehicles.

Draw up seating arrangements and makeplace cards for the rehearsal dinner andthe reception.

Decide who will stand in the receiving lineand in what order. Bone up on receiving-lineetiquette.

Are you keeping good track of gifts you receive?

Are you writing thank-you notes every day?Make any name or address changes on bank

accounts, credit cards, drivers licenses,insurance, Social Security forms, etc. Also besure to file any change-of-address cards thatmay be necessary.

Two weeks before the weddingBegin packing for your honeymoon. Buy any

toiletries, sunglasses, sunscreen, etc., thatyoull need.

Relax as much as possible! Read a great book.Take long walks. Wade in a pool. Drink fresh-squeezed orange juice.

One week before the wedding

Make final checks with your officiant, florist,caterer, photographer, videographer, bakery,musicians, transportation providers, and anyother contracted vendors.

Make sure your bridal-party gifts are wrappedand ready to be taken to the rehearsal dinner

If other friends and family members have beespecially helpful during the months andweeks leading up to your wedding, you mightlike to give them a token of appreciation, too.

Make arrangements with a friend or relative transport gifts brought to the reception backyour home or that of your parents.

Ask a close friend or family member to help t

photographer or videographer identify peoplyou especially want captured on film or tape.

The day before the weddingSpend the day pampering yourself.

Have a massage, a manicure, or a pedicure.

Rehearse your ceremony with the bridal partyGive ushers the names of reservedseating guests.

Have fun at the rehearsal dinner.

Get a good nights sleep (if possible!).

The day of the wedding

Give yourself plenty of time to get dressed.Remember to keep your cool. No wedding in

the history of time has ever gone off withoutfew hitches. Youve spent the last year plannithis event and have (naturally) lost allperspective. Honestly, nobody will notice thathe pink in the napkins is off, or the specialcake-cutting knife you ordered never arrived.If the day is magical for you, then it will befor everyone else, too.

Follow our detail-by-detail checklist to keep your wedding planson schedule from day one to the big day s end.

Cover photo courtesy

Melania Marta Photographymelaniamphotography.com


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Paying for thePerfect Day

Weddings traditionally are spectacularly beautiful. Someof them can be spectacularly expensive. For many years,most of the expenses for the wedding were paid for by the

brides parents. In recent years, tradition often has taken aback seat to more practical considerationssuch as who iswilling or able to pay. More times than not, the grooms family is pitching inon expenses, paying for some of the basics of a bigwedding or for extras to make sure the day is special.The bride and groom often chip in on certain items theywant in their weddings or picking up the tab for thewhole event. Once you know youre getting married, its a good ideato sit down with your fianc and firm up exactly what kindof wedding each of you envisionsbig or small, lavish orinformal, in a church, temple, or garden, or at home. When the two of you agree on the size and style youwant, its time to talk with all the parents. Let them knowfrom the start that you want to talk candidly about theirability and willingness to foot the cost.

Though it isnt terribly romantic, discussing a budget atthe outsetthen sticking to itcan help you steer clear ofa dangerous and common wedding pitfall: runawayspending. It wont be a true celebration if it strains yourpocketbook or that of someone you love. Being sensitive tothis makes a big difference. On this page are some traditional guidelines for weddingexpenses. Remember that they are just guidelines. Relax,have fun, and bend them according to your situation.There really is no right or wrong way to shop till you drop.

Wedding expenses can be a matterof yours, mine, and ours.

The Bride: The grooms wedding ring. A wedding present for the

groom (an optional exchange). Presents for her bridal attendants

and maid/matron of honor. Personal stationery. Accommodations for her out-of-

town attendants with family orfriends, or in hotels.

Her physical exam and blood test,if required.

The Groom: The brides engagement and

wedding rings. A wedding gift for the bride. The marriage license. Gifts for his best man and ushers. The brides bouquet, her going-

away corsage; corsages for bothmothers; boutonnieres for themen in the wedding party, ushers,and both fathers.

Accommodations for out-of-townbest man and ushers,if necessary.

His physical exam and blood test,if required.

Ties, ascots, and gloves for men in

the wedding party. The fee for the clergy orother officiant.

The honeymoon.The Brides Family: Invitations to the wedding and

other wedding-related festivities(engagement parties, next-morning brunches, etc.),announcements, thank-you cards,and all postage costs.

The brides gown, accessories,and trousseau.

A gift for the bride and groom(the wedding may be that gift!).

The cost of the ceremony,including rental of the church,temple, or other facility, as well afees for the organist, the soloistsor choir, the sexton (if applicablethe aisle carpets or canopies,the ceremony flowers, and anyother decorations.

The reception, including therental of the facility, the cateringthe cake, the beverages,the music, the flowers,and other decorations.

The photography and/orvideography.

Bridesmaids bouquets. Gratuities to those parking cars

or directing traffic. Transportation for the bridal

party from the brides house tothe ceremony and from theceremony to the reception.

A bridesmaids lunch.The Grooms Family: Their clothes for the wedding. Their own travel expenses and

accommodations, if any. A gift for the couple. The rehearsal dinner and any

other expenses they want toshare with the brides family.

The Attendants: Ceremony clothes, including

dresses, shoes, and accessories. Travel expenses. A gift for the couple.

Who Pays for What?


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LANCASTER BRIDE

WEDDING PARTIESEngagement party $______

Bridesmaids lunch $______

Rehearsal dinner $______

Out-of-town guests brunch $______

WEDDING CONSULTANTStationery $______

Invitations $______

Announcements $______

Thank-you cards $______

At-home cards $______Stamps $______

BRIDAL ATTIRE

Wedding dress $______

Headpiece and veil $______

Shoes $______

Accessories $______

Dresses for other wedding parties $______

Undergarments $______

Trousseau $______

PHOTO/VIDEOGRAPHY

Formal portraits $______

Engagement $______

Wedding and reception $______

Wedding album $______

Parents albums $______

Extra prints $______

Videography of wedding

and wedding parties $______

FLOWERSCeremony arrangements, garlands $______

Brides bouquet $______

Grooms boutonniere $______

Bridesmaids/groomsmen $______

Flower girl/ring bearer $______

Mothers corsages $______

Reception arrangements $______

RECEPTIONFood $______

Drink $______

Wedding cake $______

Grooms cake $______

Rental of facility $______

Rentals of tableware, tents,

furniture $______

Place cards $______

Tips and fees to food servers,

doormen, coat check,

valet, etc. $______

MUSIC

Ceremony (organist, soloists,

choir, other musicians) $______

Reception (band, deejay, pianist) $______

TRANSPORTATION

Limousines $______

Parking $______

GIFTSFor your groom (optional) $______

Maid/matron of honor $______

Bridesmaids $______

A gift to your parents (optional) $______

Your grooms rings $______

FEES

Church/synagogue/other location $______

Officiant $______

Officiant assistants $______

ODDS AND ENDSGuest favors $______

Birdseed or confetti packets $______

Monogrammed napkins $______

Cake knife $______

Hotel accommodations $______

Guest book and pen $______

Wedding Budget Worksheet


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Where to apply:Office of the Clerk of Orphans Court,second floor, Lancaster County

Courthouse, 50 N. Duke St., Lancaster.Hours: 8:30 to 4:30, Monday throughFriday. Marriage may take placeanywhere in Pennsylvania.

When you apply:The couple must appear in person tocomplete the marriage application.Social Security numbers and agovernment-issued photo ID arerequired. Non-US citizens must providepassport with current visa.

Age Requirements:

If both are 18 years of age, no parentalconsent or birth certificate is required.If either is 16 or 17, one parent must bepresent to issue consent. A birth

certificate and an additional $5 fee isrequired. If either is under 16, anattorney must be present to petition a

Judge of the Orphans Court forpermission for them to marry. A parentor guardian of each person must also bepresent.

Remarriages:Applicants who have been previouslymarried must provide additionalinformation concerning the dissolutionof the most recent marriage. Call forcomplete information.

Medical Examinations:The state of Pennsylvania no longer

requires a blood test or medical exam.

Who May Not Marry:Blood relatives down to and includingfirst cousins may not marry according

to Pennsylvania law.

When to Apply:In Pennsylvania, there is a three daywaiting period before the license isavailable. Apply at least one weekbefore the marriage date. The license isvalid for 60 days after the license hasbeen issued.

Fee:The fee in Lancaster County is $40,CASH only.

The Marriage License24-hour information line: (717) 295-3522 Web site: www.co.lancaster.pa.us

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More and more couples planning to walkdown the aisle are embracing save-the-date cards to give guests adequate notice

that there is a party on the horizon.

Save-the-date cards do more than let guestsknow when youre getting hitched. e cards area preliminary way to keep guests informed andlet them know they are, in fact, on the guest list.ese cards havent always been so popular, buthave risen in popularity due to longer engagementperiods, a growing number of destinationweddings and the growing number of couples with

guests from all over the country, if not the world.Considering people often plan business trips,vacations and other excursions several months inadvance, save-the-date cards help secure a greaternumber of attendees at your wedding.

Save-the-date announcements can vary in manyways. ey may be postcards or magnets that canbe attached to a refrigerator door. If you desire acohesive theme to your wedding stationery, selectthe save-the-date cards at the same time youchoose your wedding invitations. is way youcan ensure that either the patterns, fonts, colors,or style of the cards will match. It will also helpconvey the tone of the wedding. Guests oftentake their cues regarding the level of formality of

the wedding from the type of stationery coupleschoose.

When to send the announcements is importantas well. As a general rule of thumb, it is wise tomail out the cards six months in advance for astandard wedding. If the wedding requires travelor extended overnight accommodations, you may

want to mail them out 8 months to a year inadvance to give guests the time to investigate flighcosts and hotel arrangements. A wedding also maynecessitate planning a vacation or personal timeoff from work. Ample advanced notice is advisable

Be sure to make your guest list in advance ofsending out save-the-date cards. Everyone whoreceives a card should also be sent an invitationprior to the wedding. Remember to include anymembers of your planned wedding party in thelist of recipients. Just because a person has verbally

confirmed attendance at your wedding doesntmean they should be excluded from subsequentannouncements. Guests may talk to one anotherand it is best to avoid hurt feelings and any addeddrama before the wedding by treating everyoneequally.

Be sure to include the wedding date, your namesand the location of the wedding on the save-the-date cards. You do not need to offer RSVPinformation or detailed specifics at this time. Youmay want to include a Web site URL on the cardso guests can check it frequently for updates onwedding information. Be sure to also include thata formal invitation will follow at a later date. Youdo not want to cause confusion by having guests

think that the save-the-date card is the actualinvitation. Also, make sure you address the save-the-date cards correctly to show your intentionswith respect to guest invites. For example, beclear about whether children will be invited andwhether a boyfriend/girlfriend or another guestcan tag along.

cardetiquette

SAVETHEDATE


LANCASTER BRIDE


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Whether you are newly engaged or finalizing dcor details, youmay be thinking about who will make sure all the hard workyou put into your wedding will turn out the way you envision it.Heres where a day-of coordinator comes into the picture and 10reasons why you need a professional:

1. Family!Often, engaged couples expect their mother, aunt, orfriend to coordinate the day for them. ey say, Well,shes organized and going to be at the weddinganyway. Why doesnt she just coordinate it?Unfortunately, too many brides do this andthese special family members miss out onenjoying the day. You dont want them tomiss out on once-in-a-lifetime moments likewhen you put on your dress and veil.

2. Timeline!A coordinator will walk you through atimeline. It can be overwhelming to try tothink through all the little details thatneed to happen in order to make yourspecial day come to life. A professionalcoordinator has experience andknowledge, so they already know whatneeds to happen when.

3. Confirmations andCommunication!Supply your coordinator with your vendorslist about a month before the wedding sothat they can introduce themselves, deliver messages for you, and

confirm details. It is also important for the vendors to have yourcoordinators contact info, so that they can quickly get in touchwith their point of contact throughout the day. On the day-of,it is the coordinators responsibility to contact any vendors whoare running late or who might need help, to make sure thateverything can run according to schedule.

4. Direction!Every wedding ceremony needs a rehearsal. It doesnt matter ifyou and your friends have already been in three other weddings the rehearsal must happen! You want your ceremony to beflawless! Even though your coordinator has day-of in theirtitle, they often arrive the day before to direct the rehearsalalongside the offi ciant. Its important for the bridal party to meetand feel comfortable with your coordinator so that they know

she is someone they can turn to with questions throughout thewedding day as well.

5. Questions, Questions!is is one of the biggest bonuses of having a day-of coordinator.Wedding guests, vendors, and family members will try to swarmthe bride with questions. Your day-of coordinator acts as a bufferbetween you and the well-meaning inquirers. e coordinatorknows your vision for your wedding, and will be able to makequick decisions that you will be pleased with.

6. To make sure the day looks how

YOU want it toSome venues will only allow you to set up the ceremony and/or reception on the day of the wedding. While it is very helpfulto have a team of either friends (who are not in the bridalparty) or catering staff to set up the dcor, someone needs tobe in charge and direct the decorating of the

space. ere are a lot of details thatneed to be done on the morning of thewedding. e bride and groom conveys

to the coordinator what they envision. ecoordinators job is to fulfill that vision.

7. Details!Not everyone thinks about who is going to light

the ceremony candles (please, do not ask your

mom to do that!), or unwrap the dishes at thecandy bar, or move the cute direction sign from the

ceremony to the reception. ese are the little detailsthat can be taken care of by your coordinator. During

the weeks leading up to your wedding day, many thoughtsof, Who will do that? will pop into your head dont spendtime worrying about that. Just make a list and send it to yourcoordinator its that easy!

8. Greet & Guide!A wedding is a time when special people from many areas of yourlife come together to celebrate the love between you and yourfianc. Some guests will have a special role to play in your day,and your coordinator will greet and guide them. e coordinatoralso greets each vendor as they arrive to make sure they have

everything they need to succeed.While working behind the scenes of your wedding, thecoordinator also interacts with the wedding guests. You want acoordinator who is friendly and gracious to your guests, setting alovely atmosphere for enjoying a wedding day.

9. Schedules!Remember that timeline? e day-of coordinators job is to followthat timeline as closely as possible. Whether it means hiding yourgroom so he doesnt see you or running ahead of your guests tocue the DJ a coordinator makes sure everyone is where theyneed to be at the right time.

10. Peace of Mind!A wedding coordinator will take care of any problems, schedule

changes, or emergencies that might arise. You never know whena button will pop, the candle lighter will go missing, or the flowergirl will start crying the coordinator is there to make quickdecisions and take care of the little things that are bound tohappen in the midst of any event. And if they do their job right,you should be blissfully unaware and fully enjoying your day!

~ by Stephanie Torres

Wedding Planner & Day-Of Coordinator

Owner, Delight & Design

to Hire a Day-of Coordinator10 Reasons

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No matter what kind of bride you are and

how big or small your wedding will be, a day-of coordinator has often been called the bestinvestment a bride and groom can make for theirwedding. ey bring the details to life, while

keeping everything running smoothly.

Whats the difference between a weddingplanner and a day-of coordinator?

A wedding planner is by your side from thebeginning helping you pick out linen colorsand suggesting vendors that fit the style andbudget of your wedding. A day-of coordinator

meets with you 1-3 times before your wedding tohelp you structure your timeline andget to know the details of the day.en, they arrive on the day

before and day of the wedding

to coordinate the wedding dayitself. Coordinators often havewedding planning packages,

but you can also just hirethem for the day-of.

Youre Invited to join us in 2015 for the big reveal!Lancaster Bride is getting amakeover and wed like your helpto complete the transformation...

If youre getting engaged soon,wed like to hear from you!

If youre planning a wedding,wed like to hear from you!

We might just feature YOUand your love storyin the first edition of I DO, Lancaster Countys newest,

most engaging wedding publication.

Email us at [email protected] details!


LANCASTER BRIDE

1


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The average American couplespends just under $27,000 ontheir wedding. Clearly, couplescan expect to invest a substantialamount of money for theirweddings.

While many couples find the cost of awedding is well worth it, others wouldlike to find ways to save so their big dayisnt a budget-buster. Such savings arent

always easy to come by, especially forcouples with a very distinctive picturein mind of what their wedding shouldbe. However, even couples stronglycommitted to a certain weddingstyle might change their minds oncethey realize how much such a dreamwedding will cost. For those couplesas well as couples who simply want tosave some money, the following are afew ideas to avoid busting your budgetwithout venturing too far from yourdream wedding.

Trim the guest list.e guest listis perhaps the easiest place to beginsaving money. Many reception hallswill charge by the head, so consider ifyou really need to invite 150 guests orif 100 will do. Such trimming can saveyou a substantial amount of money. Forexample, a banquet hall that charges$200 per guest will cost couples witha guest list of 150 $30,000 for thereception alone. Cutting that guest list

to 100 reduces that cost by $10,000.When putting together the guest list,remove those candidates who wouldbest be described as acquaintances. iscan include coworkers with whom youdont socialize, as well as old collegefriends to whom you rarely speak.Distant cousins you havent spoken to inyears can also be cut from the list.

Dont go overboard on the gown.Styles are ever-changing, so theres a

strong chance brides wont be passingdown their wedding gowns to their owndaughters someday. Whats popular nowwill likely seem outdated by the timeyour daughter walks down the aisle.Keep this in mind when shopping fora wedding dress, which can be madein the same design as the one you tryon but with cheaper fabrics that are afraction of the cost.

Get hitched in the off-season.Manycouples prefer to get married sometimebetween the months of May through

October. During these months, venuesand vendors, including limousineservices, caterers, photographers,musicians, and deejays, are moreexpensive. If you are willing to switchyour wedding date to the off-season youcan save a substantial amount of money.In addition, you likely wont face asmuch competition for the best venuesand vendors as you will during the peakwedding season.

Trim your beverage budget.e bartab at the end of the reception can beconsiderable, but there are ways to savemoney while ensuring your guests canstill toast you and yours with a fewlibations. Rather than offering a fullbar, limit the choices to beer and wine,which will be perfectly acceptable tomost guests anyway. In addition, ratherthan paying the caterer for the wine, buyyour own and youll save a considerable

amount of money. You may have to paythe caterer a fee to pour the wine, butthat fee is negligible compared to whatyoud pay the company to provide thewine.

Choose a buffet-style dinner overwaiter service.Many guests will nodoubt prefer a buffet-style dinnerinstead of waiter service, so takeadvantage of that and choose a moreaffordable buffet-style dinner thatallows diners to choose their ownentrees and side dishes.

When it comes to trimming weddingcosts, couples will have to makecompromises. But those compromisesdont have to come at the cost of abeautiful and memorable event.

Simple ways to saveon your wedding

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For a personal tour or more informationon your special event call

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No matter what your dream

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Tips for Couples

About to MarryFinances, Too

When two people decide to get

married, theyre not onlycombining their possessions,

but theyre also bringing together uniqueideas about personal finance. ese ideasmay bring challenges to the relationshipand should be discussed beforehand forthe best start to the marriage.

Planning ahead can build a strongfinancial foundation for a new marriage.Before a couple becomes a family unit,each person has his or her own way ofsaving and spending, as well as their ownapproach to finances. Additionally, oneperson may be bringing more debt to therelationship than the other. How financeswill be handled should be one of the firstconversations even before a receptionvenue is booked or a wedding gown ischosen.

When joining finances, consider thesefactors:

1 Bank Accounts

2Budgeting Expenses

Generally couples will find that a combination of joint and personalaccounts makes finances easier. e joint account is used for monthlybills, housing expenses and things the couple does together. Separateaccounts can be used for discretionary spending, like vacation accounts,dabbling in investments or simply for splurging. is enables each personto have an independent identity but also share the responsibility of beinga couple.

Even if each individual had a budget before the marriage, the financialstatus of a spouse will change the outlook. Although each person mayhave their preferences on certain items, talking through the best waysto pool resources and save money can be an effective start to their lifetogether.

3 Estate PlanningJust because a couple is relatively young and newly married doesnt meanthey shouldnt begin planning for their future including a family immediately. Couples should explore the options on life and medicalinsurance plans. Sitting down with a financial planner can help, and heor she may be able to spell out options in retirement savings or educationsavings. Its never too early to begin investigating these scenarios.

4Keep the Lines of Communication OpenMoney often makes or breaks a relationship. Having similar goalsregarding saving and spending is often the key to couples meldingtogether. e best way to work through diffi culties and avoid problemsconcerning finances is always to talk through all of the options. Havingan open line of communication about money and participating equallyin the household finances can help equal marital success.


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Couples are faced withmany decisions when planning a wedding. One often overlookeddecision concerns the guest list. Ideally, couples would love to inviteall their friends and family to share in their special day. Realistically,however, budget often dictates just how many guests a couple caninvite.

at reality has led to a disagreement or two over the years, as boththe bride-to-be and her future husband make their case for who

makes the cut. To help avoid such disagreements, couples shouldconsider the following tips when paring down their guest list.

Make a master list as early as possible.Its impossible to pare down a guest list if theres no list to beginwith. Once the planning process begins, couples shouldseparately write down all the guests they would like to invite.Once each is finished with their list, the hard work of paringthat list down can begin.

Consider whos footing the bill.If Mom and Dad are paying for the wedding, then theirsuggestions for the guest list should carry most of the weight.Weddings are very expensive, and if Mom and Dad are paying

they should have a significant say who willbe in attendance. e same principle canbe applied if the couple is paying for theirown wedding. If the costs are being splitdown the middle, then both the groom-and bride-to-be should be allowed toinvite the same number of guests.

Ask that kids stay home.Many couples request that their guestsleave the kids at home. While niecesand nephews might make the cut, itsperfectly acceptable for couples tostate their preference that childrennot attend. is can be noted on theinvitation, addressing friends as Mr.John Doe and guest or Mr. and Mrs.John Doe. Guests should take thehint, but if any RSVPs with their kids,be sure to call them immediately

and explain the situation. Friendsand family should understand thepreference.

Its not a reunion.Couples are often tempted to invite long-lost friends to theirwedding. But cost-conscious couples must recognize their weddingis not a reunion. If the goal is to keep the guest list under control,only invite close friends and family members who have kept in touchwith over the years.

Stick to your guns.Couples vary greatly with what they want out of their wedding.Some want a grandiose affair they can share with their whole familyand all of their friends. Other couples want a more laid-back affair

with only those closest to them in attendance. Whatever theirpreference, couples should remain firm and not feel guilty no matterhow many guests they choose to invite or not invite.

Couplesareoften

facedwithtoughdecisionswh

enit

comestoparing

downtheguestlist

fortheirwedding.

heybe ibe aowdoanin

Mea

s

Coup es are often tempte to

o en

tougenit

paring

estist

e ding.

PARE

DOWNYOUR

WEDDING

GUESTLIST

INVITEONLY

Cut back in other areas.

If its proving impossible to agree on a reduced guestlist, consider inviting everyone and cutting back inother areas. Before signing any contracts, closelyexamine them for items that can be removed withoutdrastically changing the ceremony and celebration.Chances are there are savings to be had, and thosesavings might make the difference between invitingand not inviting another friend or family member.

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403 Bank Barn Lane, Lancaster, PA 17602 (717) 394-9166

Tues-Sat 9am-4pm; Sun noon-5pm www.sugarplumsandtea.com

TEA ROOMIBAKERYICATERING

Plan your special occasions with usBridal Shower Baby Shower Anniversary Birthday

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There are infinite opportunitiesfor uniqueness with weddinginvitations, which is why selectingthe right invitation is often one ofthe most confusing aspects ofplanning a wedding.

Invitations are usually your firstline of communication regardingthe upcoming celebration, andthey typically set the tone of theaffair and what guests should

expect. Wedding etiquette expertsalso say that gift-giving is subjectto influence by the type ofinvitation received. Guests alsotend to determine what they willwear to the wedding dependingupon the invitation.

All of these perceptions aboutthe wedding are made even beforeguests read the first line ofsentiment on the invitation itself.With so much inferred meaningplaced on invitations, its nowonder you may be nervous aboutchoosing and sending out

invitations. Here are some pointersso youll make the right decisions.

There are many personalizationoptions at your disposal withwedding invitations. Youll be ableto choose the texture, color andshape of the paper, as well as the

font and ink color in many cases.These selections can be combinedwith other embellishments, suchas envelope linings, extra layers ofpaper, vellum accents, ribbons, andcalligraphy styles. You may also beable to select a monogram orartwork to further embellishthe invitation.

If your wedding will be a formalaffair, choose a classic style

invitation that will reflect theformalness of the affair. If yourwedding will be casual, choose adesign and font that expressesthat feeling.

Here are some other tipsto consider:

1. Wait until you have definitetimes and locations for theceremony and reception beforesubmitting any wording to theinvitation company.

2. Type out the wording you preferwith a word-processing program

on your computer. Run a spell-check and print it out and read itover several times. This will cutdown on the chances for error oncethe wording is sent for printing.

3. To know how many invitationsto order, take the forecasted

number of guests and divide thanumber by two. Then add 25 to 3additional invitations for ansingle guests you may be invitinas well as to have extras on hand icase you make a mistakaddressing the invitation. So if yoare inviting 150 people (assuminmost will come as couples), orde100 invitations.

4. Many people opt to print ouaddresses on the invitatioenvelope themselves. While homprinters and software packagehave certainly advanced, it may bdifficult to match the font anstyle of your invitat ionFurthermore, whi le handaddressing invitations is mortime-consuming, it adds personalized touch and shows yocare about those invited.

5. Make sure you bring ainvitation to the post office to bweighed so you can determine how

much postage you will need. Mathem 4 to 6 weeks before thwedding to allow for responstime. Its customary to enclose response card with postage alreadapplied so guests can simply drotheir RSVP in the mail.

TreatGuests

to anInvitingMessage


LANCASTER BRIDE

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135 E. King St., Lancaster 717.435.9553

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Chandelier earrings and sparkling crystal bangles are popularchoices for todays sophisticated brides. In the last few years, weveseen more brides look to mirror current fashion trends in their bridal

jewelry. That translates into bigger, bolder pieces like large dramaticearrings, glittering crystal and pearl cuffs and statement necklacesthat draw attention to the neckline.

Fashionable jewelry isnt just for the bride; it also makes a great

gift for bridal party attendants. Say, thank you with the verypopular bangles that can be engraved with Friend, Sister, Niece,Mother, Grandmother, Love or other sentiments. Other treasuredand affordable bridal gifts include freshwater cultured pearls. Hand-knotted necklaces, bracelets and earrings in stud or drop stylesare favorites in pearl alone or pearl accented with cubic zirconia.

for Sophisticated Bridesand the Entire Bridal Party

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949 Church Street, Landisville,PA www.4seasonsbanquets.com 717.898.0536

Perfect Setting for your WeddingReception & all of your Celebrations!

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WeddingsAreAlwaysinSeasonWeddingsAreAlwaysinSeason

Proposing is tough enough, but finding

the perfect ring, set with the perfectdiamond is even tougher. Its important toknow what youre buying. Here are sometips to help you make the right choice.

Educate yourself. Start by learning aboutthe four Cs: clarity, cut, color and carat.Understanding how diamonds are evaluatedand categorized will allow you to determinewhich is most important to you.

Get input from your fianc.Visit yourlocal jewelry stores together and try on asmany rings as possible. Note which cuts andtypes of settings she prefers, or look at ringsin bridal magazines. If youre being discreet,look at the jewelry she wears on a day-to-

day basis or ask someone close to herfor insight.

Lets talk carats. Precious gemstonesare measured in carats. There are 100 pointsin a carat and as points or carats increase, sodoes the price of the diamond.

Pick a color.

D denotes the whitest, and

anything N and below show noticeableyellow tones. E and F have no detectablecolor tones

The cut and sparkle. Cut is the mostimportant and perhaps the mostmisunderstood and controversial of thefour Cs. When we talk cut, were talkingabout the exact angles, proportions,symmetry and polish that affect the way thediamond reflects light and sparkles.

How important is clarity? Clarity refersto how clean the gem appears when viewedthrough a magnifier. Most diamondscontain some inclusions crystallinefractures or irregular crystal growth.

Establish a budget.After determiningthe four Cs, you should be able to set abudget or at least have a figure in mind. Thegeneral rule of thumb is to set aside twomonths of salary. If youre hesitant to set adollar amount, look at your options in

diamonds and settings to get a general idea

of what youd like to spend.Select a jeweler. No matter whom you

buy from, make sure the jeweler is reputableand affiliated with the American GemSociety (AGS). Test the staffs knowledge,look into customer reviews and at thecompanys return and repair policies.

Before placing the order, ask for a gradingreport. If a grading report will notaccompany your diamond, make sure thesale is contingent upon an independentappraisers opinion.

Choosing a Diamond

Another option: Ask for a fingerprintof the diamond. This is a three-

dimensional drawing of indicatingthe four Cs, along with thediamonds dimensions andenhancements. Inclusions andblemishes should also be noted.


LANCASTER BRIDE

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Wedding Reception,Banquet & Party Facilitiesfor a Day to Remember!

323 N. Duke Street, Lancaster, PA 17602

717.394.7811 www.irisclublancasterpa.com

Encks' Custom CateringBanquet and Conference Center

1461 Lancaster Rd., Manheimat Kreider Farms

www.enckscatering.com 569-7000

Encks' Custom Catering

Specializing in Wedding Receptionsand Bridal Showers

Specializing in Wedding Receptionsand Bridal Showers

Voted #1 Caterer in the Reader's Choice Awards

Always working within your budget, you will get delicious food

for very reasonable prices. Our staff combines the perfect

blend of over 30 years experience & creativity to make your

Wedding a memorable day. Relax and let us do the work.

Wedding Day Skin

You bought the gown, scheduled the hairstylist, and picked

out the bridal accessories. But are you forgetting about one ofthe most important parts of looking beautiful on yourwedding day: your face?

Every bride wants to shine on her wedding day, but she probablydoesnt want her skin to shine, too. Problems like oily, dry, or irritatedskin plague a good portion of the population. But on your wedding dayyou dont want skin inconveniences to ruin your festivities.

One of the best ways to put your best face forward is to know yourskin type, what causes you to breakout, and to avoid any products orfoods that may contribute to the problem at least until the lastwedding photo has been snapped. If you dont know the answers tothese questions, you may want to visit a dermatologist a few months

before the wedding to talk about your concerns and to getrecommendations for proper skin care.

In addition to professional skin advice, here are some other ways tomaximize your beauty potential for your wedding day.

Cleansing & ToningHealthy skin starts with clean skin. Be sure toremove makeup every night and wash yourface with a mild cleanser appropriate for yourskin type twice daily. Toners can refresh the

skin, dry up any extra oil on the surface andclean out pores. Now is not the time toexperiment with the latest and greatestproducts out there. You dont want to riskirritation to your skin before yourwedding day.

Be GentleWhen cleansing, drying, or even applyingmakeup, treat your skin with a soft hand.Blot gently with cotton balls or swabs, andavoid tugging or rubbing the skin. Not onlycan this cause redness or irritation, it may

also contribute to long-term wrinkling.

1.

2.

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3. MakeupConservative, natural-lookingmakeup should also be the rule.The photographs you take on yourwedding day will be a testament to

the era and moments you shared.But you dont want to look datedwhen you reminisce years later.Choose muted shades on eyes, lipsand cheeks that enhance, rather thancover up your beauty. Select makeupthat is smudge- and waterproof so itwill stand up to tears of joy andkisses from well-wishers. Pressed orloose powder can also be your bestfriend. It will come in handy whenyou have to touch up spots on yourface or combat shine. Dont hide

behind a veil your entire weddingday. Learn the way to healthy,vibrant skin.

4. Not So SunsationalMany brides-to-be believe thatsuntanning will cure many of theirskin ailments. This isnt the case.While sunbathing may temporarily

alleviate acne or breakouts, it couldactually compound the problem andmake outbreaks worse over time.Other ladies think that tanned skinwill make them look better againsttheir white bridal gown. However, onyour wedding day you should looklike the best version of you, not acomplete stranger. Fair-skinnedindividuals may look out of placewith a deep tan. Err on the side ofmoderate whenever contemplatingmodifying your skin tone, as it will

affect makeup choices and otherthings as well. And avoid tanningbooths or sitting out in the sun. Ifyou must be tan, look for artificialspray tans or bronzers that createnatural-looking color.


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Almost as long as there have beenbridal gowns, white or ivory have beenthe colors of choice for first-time brides.These light hues represent the purityand innocence of the bride. Although afew brides-to-be choose to foregowedding white for something a bit moreflashy like pink or yellow gowns apopular trend today is to wear gownswith accents of black or other deep colorsto add dimension to the white canvas.

C o n s i d e r i n g t h e g r o o m a n d

groomsmen will be dressed in blacktuxedos, black accents on a weddinggown have been growing in popularityand add a formal, regal look to awedding. Darker color embellishmentscan add drama to a gown. Anotheradvantage is they can call out pattern oradornments not easily seen on a white-on-white gown. Furthermore, deepcolors against the white backdrop of thegown show well in photography,particularly the black-and-white

journalistic style that is very trendy.Women shopping for bridal gowns

who are considering colored accents

s h o u l d b e c a r e f u l t h a t t h e s eembellishments are subtle and do notoverwhelm the gown or the personwho will be wearing it! Popularenhancements include appliques on thebodice or the train of the gown. Anotheridea is to select a white gown and thentie a black bow or sash around the waistor put a lace shrug over bare shoulders.Black-and-white lace gloves are also anoption for those who want to add just alittle splash of dimension.

The same concept can be applied toany accent color. Burgundy or plumcolors also work well to add the contrast

of dark against light and arent asextreme as black. Some brides opt for apaler, more pastel shade to serve as anaccompaniment to the white gown.Many times the accent colors chosen arereplicated in the hue of the bridesmaidsgowns, so the entire wedding partylooks cohesive.

Because the spectacle will be thebeauty of the gown, its best to carry aneutral-colored bouquet in a small size.Or, a black-and-white gown can beaccented with a small nosegay of redflowers or roses.


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Hopily Ever After

where Beer Lovers begin theirSTOUDTS Bier Garden

Weddings and Banquets at Stoudts

Black Anguss Executive Chef, Josh Hilt

and staff cater to your personal needs

2800 N. Reading Rd., Route, 272 Adamstown

Over 12 styles of our award winning

hand crafted lagers and ales on tap

with a full bar available

Artisan Bread and Cheese from

our WONDERFUL GOOD MARKET

Our Reception Hall offers a one of kind space for your

wedding. This distinctive location is minutes from the

colorful homes and fountain of Stoudtburg Village and is

sure to wow any bride! The beautiful scenery is an ideal

photographing location that brings your story to life with

pictures. The reception hall is filled with eclectic antiques,

which provides a beautiful back drop for your custom

decorations. With open air courtyards and a large dance

floor, you and your guests (up to 250) will never feel

cramped or overwhelmed. For more information on our

services and allowing us to make your special day as

magical as it should be, please contact us at 717. 341. 2507

STOUDTS

www.stoudts.com

Brides- and grooms-to-be hope and pray their wedding

day will go off without a hitch. Although the idea is to hope

for the best, being prepared for a few obstacles along the

way can ensure the day goes smoothly. Many couples find itwise to pack an emergency kit, stocked with items to make

repairs or handle tie ups with ease.

Use this checklist to compile a wedding day kit that meets

your needs and customize with any speciality items.

needle and thread in white, black and the color of bridesmaid gowns

double-sided tape

safety pins

extra pairs of pantyhose

slippers or a change of shoes

makeup and lipstick for touch-ups

nail polish for chips. Clear nail polish for hosiery runs.

powder deodorant

hair spray

hair pins

hair dryer

contact lens solution/eye drops

nail file

nail clipper

quick-clean detergent stick

static cling spray

mints/gum

extra cash

umbrellas

straws (to sip drinks without ruining lipstick) black buttons

black socks

earring backs

sanitary pads or tampons

pain reliever pills

antacid

bandages

names and phone numbers of all wedding vendors

Pack an emergencywedding day kit


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Come To The

Now available for Receptions,Banquets & Special Occasions

THE RIVER ROOMour new banquet facility on the

second floor with a deck overlookingthe beautiful Susquehanna River

s

A Beautiful Setting...

For Information Contact Adrienne Zorn at [email protected]

North Front Street Wrightsville www.jwrpa.comTake Wrightsville Exit Off Rt. 30

2503 C Lititz Pike,Lancaster

weddingsbypaulette.com

(717) 553-5656

A

ll eyes are typically on thebride during a wedding.But that doesnt mean

the groom should be a shrinkingviolet. While the bridal gownmay garner the oohs andaahs, what the groom wearson his wedding day is quiteimportant as well.

In many ceremonies, the groomspends several minutes standingbeside the altar awaiting hisbride-to-be. Before the firstnotes of Here Comes the Brideare played, all eyes will be onhim as he anxiously awaits thestart of the ceremony. As such,

it is essential that the groomlook well polished and is dressedin accordance to the tone andscope of the wedding.

Because most weddings areformal occasions, groomsoften choose to wear a tuxedoor high-end suit. A well-fittedtuxedo combined with a formalshirt, tie and vest is the classicwedding ensemble. Generallythe tuxedo jacket is single-breasted with three buttonsand satin trim. is style isuniversally flattering to mostmens frames.

Accessorizing the tuxedo canmean different things. Somechoose to wear a vest whileothers opt for a cummerbund.Others add suspenders. eseaccessories, including the tieor bow tie and the vest, canbe all black like the tuxedo orcan be coordinated with thecolors of the wedding party. Forexample, if the bridesmaids are

wearing butter yellow gowns,the groomsmen can wear yellowaccessories. However, to setthemselves apart from thegroomsmen and ushers, groomstend to go with the classic blackand white and forego colors. Onsome occasions, grooms maychoose to wear a white tuxedo.

A well-groomed groom is also animportant wedding day must.He should be well-shaven andhave recently had a haircut. Ifhe has facial hair, it should betrimmed and neat.

Because he will be photographedall day long, a groom can chooseto take some cues from hissoon-to-be-spouse. He mayindulge in a manicure to ensurenails and cuticles are neat. Adusting of translucent facialpowder can tame shiny skin inphotos. Some couples opt forteeth whitening to ensure asparkling smile.

When dressing the rest of themen in a wedding, they shouldtake their cues from the groom,but not be carbon-copies of himFathers of the bride and groom

can set themselves apart witha pocket square or a speciallycolored boutonniere.

e exception to a tuxedo ora suit would be for a casualwedding, particularly one heldat the beach or in a park. enthe groom can wear what willcoordinate for the occasion,such as a dress shirt and slacks,or even sandals and shorts forthe ultra-casual wedding.

GROOMINGfor Your Wedding

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THE GROOMS CHECKLISTNine months (or longer) before the weddingFind a lovely engagement ring for your fiance.

Set a wedding date with your bride. Talk about the size andformality each of you envision for the wedding. If you plan to bemarried in a church or temple, talk with your clergy to make surethe date youve chosen is available.

Draw up a guest list for your family, friends and parents.

Six to nine months before the weddingAsk family and/or friends to be in your wedding.

Decide on your wedding attire and that of your attendants.Your fiance will be happy to help!

Start planning your honeymoon. Though your bride may want tohelp, shes going to be insanely busy. Take some initiative!Buy some travel magazines and read the Sunday travel section inyour newspaper. Send for brochures. Talk with well-traveledfriends, family, and colleagues, and get recommendations fromtravel agentsthey can offer terrific, all-inclusive packages.

Four to six months before the weddingSelect a wedding ring for your bride. Have it engraved and sized.

Reserve a site for the rehearsal dinner.

Arrange accommodations for attendants, family, and close friendsHelp your bride make bridal gift registry selections.

Shop for attendants gifts. Leave ample time to find things thatare personal and meaningful.

Apply for passports if needed for the honeymoon.

Two to three months before the weddingFirm up your honeymoon plans. Make final payments.

Four to six weeks before the weddingBe sure you and your fiance have all the necessary blood tests,

physical exams, birth certificates, and baptismal papers to obtaina marriage license.

Make necessary changes in insurance: medical, household, fire,personal property, and life.

Two to four weeks before the weddingApply for a marriage license with your bride.

Give the wedding party, close friends, and family (and if possible,any out-of-town guests) information regarding the time and placeof the wedding rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.

If youll move after the wedding, fill out change-of-address cards(available at the post office).

One week before the weddingGive your rehearsal dinner caterer or restaurant a firm number

of attendees.

Double-check your honeymoon plans.

Begin packing for your honeymoon.

Attend your bachelors dinner (probably given by your best man

and groomsmen).

The day before the weddingRehearse your ceremony with the bridal party. Give your ushers

the names of reserved seating guests. Have a good time at yourrehearsal dinner.

The day of the weddingBring your marriage license to be signed.

Give your best man the officiants check to handle.

Remember to bring your brides wedding ring. Arrive at thewedding site with your attendants an hour before the ceremony.

Have fun, and congratulations!

Before the Wedding

Help pick out the tuxedos and show up for fittings. Help plan and share the cost of the bachelor party. Attend rehearsals for the ceremony and appear at the rehearsal dinner. Pay for their own wedding attire or formal wear rentals. Pay for their travel expenses and accommodations during the celebration. Return formal wear for themselves and the groom. Provide transportation for the couple to the airport or

honeymoon destination if the best man is unavailable.

During the Ceremony Greet and seat guests at the ceremony. Stand near the groom during the ceremony. Serve as escorts for the bridesmaids at the ceremony.

Party Time Ensure that the groom does not get too intoxicated. Sit at the table of honor beside the rest of the bridal party. Mingle with the guests. Participate in all photos if asked. Dance with their bridesmaid counterpart. Help load the wedding gifts into the car.

RESPONSIBILITIESOF THEGROOMSMENHappy couples choose friends and family members to serve asattendants in their weddings. Bridesmaids and groomsmeneach have different responsibilities in the wedding.

In ancient times, groomsmen essentially served as the groomsbodyguards, ensuring that he made it safely to the altar and tohis future wife. Today, the groomsmens roles are not based onsaving life and limb.

Todays groomsmen serve as assistants to the groom andhelp plan the bachelor party. ey also usher guests downthe aisle at the ceremony. ey also may have a few otherresponsibilities, depending on what the couple wants of theirassistants.


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We have the right size coach to meet yourwedding party needs - 25, 30, 38, 48, 56 passengers

Accommodates up to 20 passengers

Climate Controlled & Open Air option Oak Paneled walls& bench seating PA system, with radio & CD player

www.elitecoach.com 800-722-62061685 West Main St., Ephrata, PA

Start your history

Lancaster Elks Lodge #134

219 N Duke Street Lancaster PA 17602

717-397-7704 www.lancasterpaelks.com

For event information, email [email protected]

a t t h e h i s t o r i c L a n c a s t e r E l k s

FOR ALL YOUR SPECIAL EVENT NEEDS

Photo courtesy of Kate Dussinger

Getting there can be half the fun, whenit comes to wedding transportation.There are many choices: antique cars,horse-drawn carriages, trolleys, forexample. Some couples get even more

carried away, so to speak, when they getpersonal with their mode oftransportation: a Jeep, a Harley, onhorseback, or even a fire engine.

First, consider who will be riding in thevehicle. If its just the two of you, one ofthe super stretch limos would be a bitexcessive. Youll need the extra room ifyou add the bridesmaids to the trip. Ifrenting two or more limos, check to makesure that they will all be the same color.White is traditional, but black, midnightblue, and grey can work just as well.

Here are some tips for making

transportation arrangements:1. Shop around. Compare prices to get the

best rate.

2. Insist on seeing the actual car that youwill be using. Copy down the licenseplate and let them know youll be

looking to make sure its the same carthat shows up on your wedding day.

3.Meet the driver and make sure there isan understanding about proper attire.Do you want him/her to wear a tuxor uniform?

4.Get everything in writing. A contractprotects both you and the limousinecompany. The contract should state thelocation, date, time, specific vehicle,rate, estimated total cost, and deposit.Dont forget the drivers tip in yourwedding budget. The typical tip is15-20 percent.

5.Ask about insurance and currentlicenses that the driver is requiredto have.

6.When making the arrangements, bookthe limo for an hour or two more than

you think you will need. It may not bepossible to extend the rental time at alater date.

7.Make your arrangements about a yearin advance, and call about two weeksprior to the wedding to confirm details.

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Rehearsal dinner

The wedding party, the parents of thebride and groom, usually the clergy

member and spouse, and sometimes theorganist and spouse attend the rehearsaldinner. (The attendants spouses may beinvited to the dinner, but it is not necessary,especially if the wedding party is large.)

The maid/matron of honor and bestman are given the seats of honor next tothe bride and the groom. The best mansits next to the bride. The clergy memberand spouse and the brides father andmother are given seats of honor next tothe host and hostess. Then the remainingguests fill in the rest of the seats.

At the church

The wedding party should arrive at thechurch at least an hour before theceremony is to begin. Guests usually startarriving a half hour before the scheduledtime.

The groom and best man should wait ina room near the altar. In most cases, thefirst time the groom should be seen by thewedding guests is when he and the bestman come out by the altar just beforethe processional.

Processional

Depending on the number ofattendants and your own preference, thegroomsmen may walk down the aislesingle file or in pairs. (Or, they may enterthe church with the groom and best man.)Usually they are paired by height, with theshorter ones followed by the taller ones.Next are the bridesmaids, paired orsingle file.

The maid/matron of honor follows thebridesmaids. (If there is to be a maid andmatron of honor, the one who is chosen as the

chief honor attendant follows the other. Or ifboth assist in the ceremony, they may godown the aisle together.) Next is the ringbearer (if you have one); he is followed bythe flower girl (or they can be paired).

This arrangement is generally the samefor Reform Jewish ceremonies, thoughConservative and Orthodox ceremoniesmay differ.

The groomsmen join the groom andbest man, usually in a line facing theguests, for the beginning of the ceremony.The bridesmaids go to the other side ofthe altar. Or, if you prefer, thebridesmaids and groomsmen can be

arranged as couples for the beginning.Usually, each church has a customaryarrangement, but dont hesitate tosuggest variations.

Finally, its time for the bride and herfather. In most cases, the bestarrangement is for the bride to be on thefathers right. Then, when he gives youaway and returns to his own seat on theleft side of the church, he wont have tostep over the train. However, in JewishConservative or Orthodox weddings, thebrides parents sit on the right side. Insome cases, the parents also may standwith the wedding party. In most Christianceremonies, a father escorts his daughteronly as far as his pew since he does nottechnically give away the bride.

Entrances of the wedding partymembers, with the exception of thebrides, are usually spaced about fourpews apart. The bride may double thatspacing for her entrance, or wait until theentire length of the aisle is clear. Thelatter tends to add more drama to thebrides appearance.

Recessional

The recessional works in the reverse ofthe processional. The bride and groom, ofcourse, are first. The ring bearer andflower girl follow. Then there are a coupleof options: The attendants may be paired,with the best man and maid/matron ofhonor leading and the other bridesmaidsand groomsmen following in pairs. (Ifthere are both a maid and a matron of honor,the matron is paired with the best man andthe maid with the first groomsman, if theyboth assist in the ceremony. If one is chosen

to be the chief attendant, she is paired withthe best man.) Or the maid/matron ofhonor goes first, followed by the pairedbridesmaids, with the groomsmenfollowing in pairs. In this case, the bestman would leave with the clergy memberthrough the vestry.

Receiving line

If a wedding is very formal, fathersoften stand in the receiving line. For mostreceptions, only the mothers, the brideand groom, the brides honor attendant,and, optionally, the bridesmaids stand in

line. (The grooms attendants never join thereceiving line.)

The brides mother is first in line, to actas hostess. (In very la rg e or for ma lweddings, an announcer, whose job is tointroduce the guests to the brides mother,may be first in line. The announcer may be a

professional at an ultraformal wedding, butwould be a relative or family friend at aformal or semiformal wedding.) Thebridesmaids may stand on each side ofthe bride and groom or to one side.

Standing in a receiving line for anextended time can be grueling. Plan as ageneral rule, to keep the line intact for

about 45 minutes. You can exchangegreetings with late arrivals during theremainder of the reception. The bride andgroom should stay at the reception for atleast 2 hours, but should leave while mostof the guests are still there.

As many members of the wed dingparty as possible should stay at thereception until the last guest has left tohelp the brides parents take care of themany last-minute details.

Who should be where, whenSome guidelines to get the important people in your

lives and your wedding where they need to be.

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e difference between

Escort &Place Cards

Weddings are steepedin tradition. Manycouples choose to follow

etiquette and formal party ruleswhen hosting one of the biggestdays of their lives.

An important aspect of eachwedding is ensuring guests arecomfortable. Part of this involvesinforming reception attendantswhere they will be seated at thedinner and festivities.

Many people mistake escort cards

and place cards as being one andthe same. ey are actually twodifferent components. Escortcards indicate the table whereguests will be seated, while placecards indicate which seat guestsare assigned to.

Escort and place cards do notnecessarily have to be cards.Creative couples can come upwith clever ideas to displayseating arrangements. At smallerweddings, it might be possible tohang escort cards on a ribbon orattach them to votive candles thatserve as a favor for guests. Foran outdoor wedding or a nature-themed event, use faux or realbranches and cut slits in one side.

When printing escort cards, do soon leaf-shaped paper and insertinto the slits on the branches.Escort cards can also be fashionedinto flowers that are attached tosticks planted in a flower pot. eideas are endless.

Escort CardsGenerally escort cards aredisplayed on a table outside thereception or dining room. eymay be arranged by themselvesor more formally packaged withinlittle envelopes. ey should beorganized alphabetically so thatguests can easily recognize theirnames on the card. ey can beworded as such: Mr. John Smith,for a single guest; Mr. & Mrs.John Smith, for a married couple;or Mr. John Smith & Guest, if theguest is unknown. It is consideredmore polite if the bride andgroom inquire as to whom singleguests will be bringing so thatthose peoples name can be usedon the escort card as well.

Place CardsPlace cards are used to indicateseats at each table. ey will haveeach individuals name in frontof the place setting at the table.ey serve as a way to avoidingseating confrontations at thewedding. Couples and similarlyrelated guests are often placed atthe same table. Individuals whomay have tense relationships maybe separated. Place cards alsomay make it easier for wait staffto recognize specific people whomay have dietary restrictions ifinformed in advance by the brideand groom.


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Picking a photographer foryour wedding can be a lot likegetting married. You have tomake sure you are compatibleby making sure you both wantthe same things. You have to

be willing to listen to eachother and compromise onsome points. You have to besure this relationship is goingto last. Then there are theconcerns about money. Both relationships startwith a question. A marriagestarts by one person askinganother, Will you marry me?

Your relationship with yourwedding photographer startsby asking yourself, What arethe most important thingst o r e me mb e r f r om my

special day? Youd be surpri sed howdifferent the answers to thatquestion can be. Of course,youll want to remember howbeautiful the bride looked inher wedding gown, and howhandsome the groom lookedin his tuxedo. The other mostspecial things, though, willbe different for a lmostevery couple. Why, then, would you wanta wedding album that lookslike every other album youve

e v e r s e e n ? F i n d aphotographer who will workwith you to capture just thephotos you want from yourwedding. How do you do that?B y l o o k i n gat lots of examples of aphotographers work andasking lots of questions. W h e n y o u g o t o aphotographers studio to talkabout your wedding pictures,pay particular attention to the

type and quality of shotsdisplayed there. This should bethe photographers best andmost creative work. If thosephotos arent razor sharp andof the highest technical

quality, what do you think therest of the photographerswork is like? This should bethe best he or she can do. Notice the style of thephotos displayed. Are all ofthem the same? Are they justthe traditional poses or arecandids and experimentals h o t s m i x e d i n ? T h etraditional package may be justwhat youre looking for, butmany couples want morecandid photos and creativityfrom their photographer.

What is important is makingsure the photographer you hiresuits the style of photos youwant. One way of doing that is tofill out the checklist on thenext page and take it withy o u a s y o u i n t e r v i e wphotographers. For mostprofessionals, this will not beseen as a challenge to theircreativity. Most will welcome itand use it as a jumping-offspot for more creative work. At the very least, you will

both know from the start whateach expects from thisrelationship. It might bebetter if more marriagesstarted this way.

Beginning the Search Start shopping for yourwedding photographer aboutthe same time you beginpicking out a wedding dress.Dont even wait for the dateand time for the wedding to be

set. As soon as you know amonth, start approaching

photographers you thinkmight be right. Some dates,especially in peak weddingperiods, are reserved withphotographers more than ayear in advance. To begin shopping for aphotographer, ask recentbrides for recommendations.If you dont know any brides,ask your clergyman for thenames of couples recentlymarried and for permission toapproach them about theirwedding photographs.

Compile a shopping list ofseveral photographers fromthese recommendations andcall to make appointments. At each studio, take note ofhow you are treated by thestaff and photographer. Makesure they are open to showingyou a wide array of samplesand are interested in meetingyour needs and not just takingpictures. Ask to see workspecifically shot by the

photographer who will be atyour wedding, not work done

by just anyone in the company.Also ask to see photos shot

in the same place as you will begetting married. Use thesephotos to judge the work andplan your package. Talk to more than onephotographer or studio andcompare prices. Make sure youget prices on comparablepackages or albums so you cancompare apples to apples,and be sure to ask how muchmore special setups or poses

will cost. Be sure to find out ifthe price includes candidp h o t o g r a p h y f r o m t h ereception or only the basicposes from the ceremony. Ask about the cost ofadditional prints or albums forfamily or friends. Just remember, shop forwedding photos the same wayyou would for anything elsethat you will treasure fora lifetime.

Wedding photos can be your mosttreasured mementos if they capture

many of the moments and people thatmake your day special.Photos

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A wedding day toast is a tradition that haslong been a part of wedding celebrations. Toastsare a personal way of commemorating the goodfortune of the newly betrothed and lookingforward to future happiness.

The best man traditionally gives the maintoast at the wedding. At different occasions onthe road to the wedding there may be otheropportunities for toasts from the maid of honoror even the parents of the bride and groom.

While some people are natural orators andhave no trouble speaking in front of largecrowds of people, the majority of toastersapproach the toast with a bit of trepidation.

Apart from the anxiety of speaking in front of agroup of friends and relatives, it can be nerve-wracking to come up with sentiments for thetoast, which can mean the difference betweena memorable or an embarrassing weddingday experience.

While there are no toasting guarantees,following a few tips can help nervous toastersdo a bang-up job.

Be prepared: Individuals who try to wingit the day of the wedding may find their nervesget the best of them. Itsbest to write out yourthoughts in advance of thewedding and fine tune yoursentiments many times.

Think about whether youwant to go funny orsentimental. Consider yourrelationship with the brideand groom and try topersonalize the speech asmuch as possible. Practicethe toast in front of othersand get some unbiasedo p i n i o n s b e f o r e t h ewedding.

Time it right: If thethought of spending theentire reception waiting togive the toast has you on edge, ask the

prospective couple if you can give the toastearly on in the event. This way you can relaxafterward and enjoy the party.

Jot down notes: If you think your nerveswill get the best of you, bring some index cardswith key phrases of the toast. You could write

out the entire speech, but if you simply read ithe toast could seem stiff and impersonal.

Hold off on cocktails:While its generallfine to have one or two drinks prior to the toasto loosen up, its not recommended to b

intoxicated. Alcohol anpublic speaking often do nomix. You dont want to sasomething you will regrelater on or make a mocker

of the wedding.Keep it short:Aim for

two- or three-minute speechSomething long-windewont hold the attention owedding guests who arlooking to get on with thf u n o f t h e w e d d i nreception.

S p e ak s l o w l y an dclearly: Ar ti cu la te anspeak loud enough severyone can hear th

speech. You will likely b

handed a microphone. If you get nervous antrip up, simply make a quick joke and get bacto it. Others will understand if you are tense.

Dont be afraid of getting emotionaWedding guests would rather see real feelingthan a beauty-pageant speech. So if you gechoked-up, dont worry.

Toast

Tips


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wedding cake

TRENDSTHIS SEASONT

he multi-tiered cake is a favorite wedding tradition thats oftenpresented at the end of the night. e happy couple takes a slice and enjoysthe first piece.

In recent years, wedding cakes have become more of an artistic centerpiece thanjust a confectionary treat. Couples often seek out renowned wedding cake bakersfor a cake that will amaze the crowd and complete the theme of the wedding.

e average couple will spend between $700 to $800 for their wedding cake.Although many catering halls or reception sites will include the wedding cake in apackage deal, many couples choose to order their cake from a specialty bakery whocreates culinary masterpieces.

If television trends are any indication, many people are opting to spend severalhundred to thousands of dollars on a customized wedding cake. ese fondantand buttercream creations may be elaborate in nature, so much so theyll likelyneed to be ordered several months

lancaster bride

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