i'm going to uni

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I’m going to uni... How to navigate your way through a potentially challenging chat.

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Page 1: I'm going to uni

I’m going to uni...How to navigate your way through

a potentially challenging chat.

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Awesome! Has the time come to tell your friends and family?

As a First in Family student, depending on how familiar your family is with the concept of uni, this could be a very new topic. It’s understandable if you feel a bit concerned about

how they might react.

Remember, back yourself and remain confident in your decision about going to uni.

So you want to go to uni

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First things first. Don’t rush into things.

When you decide to have a conversation about uni with your friends and family, you want to make sure you’re in a comfortable setting with no distractions so you have their full attention.

Pick your time and place

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Here’s what you might like to consider when picking the perfect time to have this conversation:

Are they aware you’ve been thinking about going to uni or will this discussion come as a surprise? If it’s likely to surprise them, it might be a good idea to start planting the seed by discreetly bringing uni up in conversations without actually giving away that you’re strongly

considering it just yet.

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Here’s what you might like to consider when picking the perfect time to have this conversation:

Are they aware you’ve been thinking about going to uni or will this discussion come as a surprise? If it’s likely to surprise them, it might be a good idea to start planting the seed by discreetly bringing uni up in conversations without actually giving away that you’re strongly

considering it just yet.

Do you know how they feel about the idea of uni? Are they likely to feel positive or negative about your decision? It could be a good idea to be prepared for the conversation to go

either way.

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Here’s what you might like to consider when picking the perfect time to have this conversation:

Are they aware you’ve been thinking about going to uni or will this discussion come as a surprise? If it’s likely to surprise them, it might be a good idea to start planting the seed by discreetly bringing uni up in conversations without actually giving away that you’re strongly

considering it just yet.

Do you know how they feel about the idea of uni? Are they likely to feel positive or negative about your decision? It could be a good idea to be prepared for the conversation to go

either way.

Understandably, they may have a few questions, so it’s probably not a good idea to bring it up if you’re in a hurry or on your way out the door. Pick a time when you know your family

member or friend has time to spend discussing the topic.

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Remember, back yourself and

remain confident in your decision about

going to uni.

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Or at least have some answers ready!

It’s likely that there’s probably going to be a few questions. No matter how your friends and family feel towards university, this can be anticipated.

By doing your research BEFORE you bring uni up in conversation, you’ll be able to put their mind at ease and remain confident in your decision to go to uni.

Here are some topics to start thinking about before having the conversation:

Do a little research

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How long will it take to complete your degree?

Will you work while you’re studying?

Will you work while you’re studying?

What would you like to study?

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How long will it take to complete your degree?

Will you work while you’re studying?

Will you work while you’re studying?

Where will you live while at uni?

What would you like to study?

What are you hoping to get out of uni?

What’s the likely impact on your family or

friends (e.g., less availability, costs to them in terms of finances, time, and

resources)?

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How long will it take to complete your degree?

What will uni cost? Will you work while you’re studying?

Will you work while you’re studying?

Where will you live while at uni?

What would you like to study?

Why do you want to go uni?

What are you hoping to get out of uni?

What are you hoping your uni degree will lead to?

What’s the likely impact on your family or

friends (e.g., less availability, costs to them in terms of finances, time, and

resources)?

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You can get in contact with one of our Student Relationship Officers or one of our Career Development Practitioners, who will be able to help you out with

any study or career related questions you might have!

Need help preparing answers to these questions?

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It’s ok if you don’t know all the answersWhile it’s great to try and be as prepared as possible, you also can’t be expected to be an

expert on the topic of university while you’re still learning yourself.

So while it’s fair for your friends and family to have lots of questions, don’t be afraid to remind them that this is all new for you too.

Let them know that you will keep them in the loop once you find out more information.

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Remember, back yourself and

remain confident in your decision about

going to uni.

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Scenario 1: A positive reactionAfter telling your friends and family that you’re thinking of going to university you may find

they might say some things like:

That’s awesome.YAY! I’m so happy for you!

That’s a great idea.

I’m so proud of you!

Good on you.

How exciting!

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What could you say in this situation?Embrace it with these 3 steps to welcoming this reaction.

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What could you say in this situation?Embrace it with these 3 steps to welcoming this reaction.

1. Show your appreciation for their support. This is your chance to say thank you to your family and friends for supporting your decision.

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What could you say in this situation?Embrace it with these 3 steps to welcoming this reaction.

1. Show your appreciation for their support. This is your chance to say thank you to your family and friends for supporting your decision.

2. Double check they don’t have any questions. Make sure that with all the good vibes in the room you don’t forget to double check whether your friends and family have any questions about your decision.

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What could you say in this situation?Embrace it with these 3 steps to welcoming this reaction.

1. Show your appreciation for their support. This is your chance to say thank you to your family and friends for supporting your decision.

2. Double check they don’t have any questions. Make sure that with all the good vibes in the room you don’t forget to double check whether your friends and family have any questions about your decision.

3. Ensure they know the lines of communication are open. If they don’t have questions or concerns right now, make sure they know that if this changes, they can talk to you about your decision at any time.

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Scenario 2: Didn’t receive the reaction you’d hoped for?If after talking to your friends and family about university you find they say

some things like:

You won’t be able to handle it.

Why would you want to do that?

It’s too expensive.

You’re not smart enough for that.

It’ll be too hard for you.

That’s a stupid idea. You don’t have my support.

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What could you say in this situation?Take a deep breath. This might not have been the reaction you would have liked, but it doesn’t

mean that you have made the wrong choice or that they won’t warm up to the idea. Here are 3 steps to navigating a negative reaction:

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What could you say in this situation?Take a deep breath. This might not have been the reaction you would have liked, but it doesn’t

mean that you have made the wrong choice or that they won’t warm up to the idea. Here are 3 steps to navigating a negative reaction:

1. Give them a chance to share their point of view. Make sure you give your friends and family the opportunity to explain why they might not be such fans of the idea of you going to university. Their initial negative reaction could be due to worry or concern about the “unknown” and what impact it might have on you and on them.

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What could you say in this situation?Take a deep breath. This might not have been the reaction you would have liked, but it doesn’t

mean that you have made the wrong choice or that they won’t warm up to the idea. Here are 3 steps to navigating a negative reaction:

1. Give them a chance to share their point of view. Make sure you give your friends and family the opportunity to explain why they might not be such fans of the idea of you going to university. Their initial negative reaction could be due to worry or concern about the “unknown” and what impact it might have on you and on them.

2. Try and put their minds at ease. Try your best to answer any questions or minimise any concerns they might have. Remember the research you did earlier?

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What could you say in this situation?Take a deep breath. This might not have been the reaction you would have liked, but it doesn’t

mean that you have made the wrong choice or that they won’t warm up to the idea. Here are 3 steps to navigating a negative reaction:

1. Give them a chance to share their point of view. Make sure you give your friends and family the opportunity to explain why they might not be such fans of the idea of you going to university. Their initial negative reaction could be due to worry or concern about the “unknown” and what impact it might have on you and on them.

2. Try and put their minds at ease. Try your best to answer any questions or minimise any concerns they might have. Remember the research you did earlier?

3. Give them some time and space. If all else fails, perhaps give them some time to think about what you’ve said. In the meantime, don’t let this minor setback stop you from making university happen for you. Once the dust has settled, try talking to them about your decision again.

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What could you say in this situation?Take a deep breath. This might not have been the reaction you would have liked, but it doesn’t

mean that you have made the wrong choice or that they won’t warm up to the idea. Here are 3 steps to navigating a negative reaction:

1. Give them a chance to share their point of view. Make sure you give your friends and family the opportunity to explain why they might not be such fans of the idea of you going to university. Their initial negative reaction could be due to worry or concern about the “unknown” and what impact it might have on you and on them.

2. Try and put their minds at ease. Try your best to answer any questions or minimise any concerns they might have. Remember the research you did earlier?

3. Give them some time and space. If all else fails, perhaps give them some time to think about what you’ve said. In the meantime, don’t let this minor setback stop you from making university happen for you. Once the dust has settled, try talking to them about your decision again.

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again! - Unknown

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Remember, back yourself and

remain confident in your decision about

going to uni.

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The word is out, but where to from here?Now that your friends and family know what you’re planning to do, what should you do next?

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The word is out, but where to from here?Now that your friends and family know what you’re planning to do, what should you do next?

Whether the conversation went great or not as well as you hoped, here are a few tips to help you work together towards starting your journey at university.

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The word is out, but where to from here?Now that your friends and family know what you’re planning to do, what should you do next?

Whether the conversation went great or not as well as you hoped, here are a few tips to help you work together towards starting your journey at university.

Follow up with them. If your friends and family asked a question or had concerns that you didn’t have an answer for, make sure you get back to them. Try undertaking some further research into the topic and let them know once you’ve

learnt more about it.

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The word is out, but where to from here?Now that your friends and family know what you’re planning to do, what should you do next?

Whether the conversation went great or not as well as you hoped, here are a few tips to help you work together towards starting your journey at university.

Follow up with them. If your friends and family asked a question or had concerns that you didn’t have an answer for, make sure you get back to them. Try undertaking some further research into the topic and let them know once you’ve

learnt more about it.

Point them to resources. Show them where they can find information too. It’s great that you can pass on information to them, but sometimes people like to see things for themselves. Why not show them USQ’s Social Hub?

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The word is out, but where to from here?Now that your friends and family know what you’re planning to do, what should you do next?

Whether the conversation went great or not as well as you hoped, here are a few tips to help you work together towards starting your journey at university.

Follow up with them. If your friends and family asked a question or had concerns that you didn’t have an answer for, make sure you get back to them. Try undertaking some further research into the topic and let them know once you’ve

learnt more about it.

Point them to resources. Show them where they can find information too. It’s great that you can pass on information to them, but sometimes people like to see things for themselves. Why not show them USQ’s Social Hub?

Do it together. When the time comes, start attending Open Days and Orientation together. This should help them to learn more about what you’ll be doing at university and start to normalise the concept for

you and your friends and family.

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Uni is a really independent experience and some students like to keep it to themselves, which is great. Other students want their friends and family to be a part of their time at uni every

step of the way.

We suggest doing your best to keep your friends and family in the loop. All students need support from time to time, plus it’s a great and exciting experience to share.

It’s up to you how involved you want your friends and family to be

in your uni journey.

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If telling your friends and family is becoming more difficult than you had hoped, or maybe you just need some assistance with finding answers to their questions and concerns,

don’t forget that we’re here for you.

Our Student Relationship Officers or Career Development Practitioners are always happy to help and provide you with the information you need when the time comes to having your chat!

Need some help?

CRICOS: QLD00244B NSW02225M TEQSA: PRV12081 00.0.A 05.2016 Graphics © Shutterstock Photos © USQ Online Marketing

social.usq.edu.auThe First in Family Project (Phase 2) is funded through the Commonwealth Government’s Higher Education Participation Program (HEPP) in 2016, to improve the access, participation and success of students from communities under-represented in higher education.