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Explore it! The REAL Kendall County

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Page 1: Explore | November 2010

November 2010

Page 2: Explore | November 2010

2 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.(210) 402-6363

The Reserve atCresta Bella

Estate Lots from the $175’sGated Community

NISD SchoolsCity Services

Located on IH10 West atCamp Bullis Road

Page 3: Explore | November 2010

November 2010 www.hil lcountryexplore.com 3

Hacienda STYLE, Old World DECORATING & Elegant Ranch DESIGNS

31300 IH-10 West (exit 543 across from toyota) Boerne, Texas 78006

830.755.6355 | 210.535.3070

AWARD WINNER OFBest Master Suite: 2009 TerraMont Parade of Homes

Best Outdoor Living: 2009 TerraMont Parade of HomesBest Master Suite and Best Kitchen: 2010 Summit Award

email:[email protected]

OPENING SOON

La Catrina(Near La Cantera Right on Loop 1604)

Page 4: Explore | November 2010

4 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.

From the Publisher

There is a really neat local company here in town called Texas Bid. It’s basically a local version of eBay. Run by a great guy, it focuses on “Estate Sales.” If you don’t know what that is…when Grandpa dies, you are left with an entire home full of his stuff. What do you do with it? You call Texas Bid and let people buy everything he owned.

I’ve used the service frequently. It’s a great way to pick up an old shotgun, or some hand tools, or a patio set. They have antique pictures, rusted old yard tools, and even automobiles. If you want it, odds are that Texas Bid has it.

Sometimes some of the items give me pause. An old rocking chair handmade in the late 1800s. Who built it? How many moms and

dads rocked their babies in that chair? Who wore the wood on the arms down to a shiny finish?

An old slide projector. How many times did Grandpa bore everyone by showing them his adventure to Europe? How many laughs were had?

An old SkilSaw. You know, the old ones that were all metal and weighed about 40 pounds. What did Grandpa build with it? How many times did he show his own son how to use it? I can just see him with a sweaty face and a cowboy hat with the sun beating down on his back.

An old glass ashtray with burn marks. It’s ugly, with that dark green color that was popular in the ‘40s. I can just see Grandpa sitting in his easy chair smoking a cigar and reading the funnies. How many thousands of cigars were smoked here? How many troubles did he ponder over this ashtray?

You, as the buyer, are buying up all of the items that made up this person’s life. Their favorite blanket. Their antique tea set from their great-grandmother. A hand-

made quilt. A favorite chair. It’s all the “paint” that was used to create a person’s life and surroundings. It’s the backdrop to the “movie” of their lives.

Sometimes you come across a sale and you see a lot of guns, tools, yard equipment, saddles, and ashtrays. His stuff is older and meticulously maintained. The wooden corners of his rocker are worn smooth. He has a large smoking pipe collection. Your brain creates a picture of a John Wayne-type character, complete with heavy drawl. Surely he had hands the size of a baseball glove, chewed on a twig of straw, and drove a really old Ford pickup. He wore a cowboy hat, kept a handkerchief in his back pocket, and ate biscuits with every meal. He took care of his belongings, and left this earth a proud man.

And then I look around. I wonder what my “backdrop” would say about me? As for me, I have a huge TV, and a new truck. I have a video game system. My tools in the garage are shoddy, made of plastic, and are shipped from China. I don’t own an ashtray. I don’t have great-grandma’s old rocker. My furniture is from Pier One, not handmade heirlooms. My DVD collection is larger than my book collection. My favorite easy chair was purchased off Craigslist. I look at those items of another man’s life and see an indelible mark left in them, and in turn, on this world. His “stuff” was legendary, was part of other people’s memories, and is now of sufficient quality to be used by future generations. Mine won’t last through next year.

I want a barrister railing on my stairs that is completely worn by my children running down the stairs and putting their hand on it. I want an old patio swing that has all the paint rubbed off of it by my family’s countless evenings enjoying a swing at dusk. I want a quilt that my wife sewed for our children. I want a collection of high-quality cufflinks.

I want china from my great-grandmother. I want tools that will last forever. I do know that “things” do not create your life. My John Wayne character might

have actually been a lazy bum drunk in real life…but his possessions don’t point to that. And so again, I wonder what my possessions point to. I know that nowadays, everything is cheap and plastic and disposable. EVERYTHING. Why spend $100 to fix your lawn mower when you can get a new one for not much more? I could never have my old patio swing because I’d probably buy one made out of some sort of plastic. Why reupholster my easy chair when I could just get a different and better one? And it never ends.

Maybe I just think that it would be nice to have some things that would travel through my entire life with me. From young adulthood, to middle age, to retirement, and ultimately to death. I want an old friend that has weathered this life with me and never changes. Something that is more durable than I am. Something that is part of the backdrop of my life. Something that is BEYOND me that will be around for my kids, and their kids, and their kids. Something that the kids will remember as unique to me and make them smile when they see it or hold it. Something timeless.

And maybe that’s not really realistic anymore. A man is an adventurous being, and I’d wish that my belongings pointed to a life of adventure. I’d wish that my mark on this world is profound and worn and quality. A friend told me one time “Life should abrade, ya know?”

So please enjoy EXPLORE. While it’s not handmade heirloom furniture, it’s from the heart. And while I don’t have imported Italian cufflinks, I like to think I can spin a pretty good yarn. And hopefully I can make you smile. And maybe that’s as timeless as anything.

Smiling,Benjamin D. Schooley

Explore what's inside this issue!NOVEMBER

EXPLORE magazine is published by Schooley Media Ventures in Boerne, Tx. EXPLORE Magazine and Schooley Media Ventures are not responsible for any inaccuracies, erroneous information, or typographical errors contained in this publication submitted by advertisers. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect

the opinions of EXPLORE and/or Schooley Media Ventures. Copyright 2010Schooley Media Ventures, 203 Shadywood, Boerne, TX 78006

PuBLISHERBenjamin D. Schooley – [email protected]

CREATIVE DIRECTORTamara Hooks – [email protected]

ASSOCIATE PuBLISHERAlison Turner – [email protected]

DESIGN INTERNSDon A. Dewberry

Kelsey King

ADVERTISING SALES210-507-5250 or [email protected]

6: CalendarofEvents

12: Music16: Shopping18 History

20: NovemberinaNutshell24: Feature:SchooleyFor Mayor

32: HillCountryChronicles36: Dining38: Spiritual

dearest eXPLore reader,

Page 5: Explore | November 2010

November 2010 www.hil lcountryexplore.com 5

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Page 6: Explore | November 2010

6 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.

Get out and enjoy the Great texas hill Country!the most comprehensive events calendarsend submissions to [email protected]

November 20 GRuENE: roGer CreaGer With roB Baird.Gruene Hall, 1281 Gruene Rd. For more information, please call (830)629-5077 or visit www.gruenehall.com.

KERRVILLE: holiday liGhted Parade & Courthouse liGhtinG. This festival of live music, crafts, games, a parade and more celebrates the beginning of the holiday season. Downtown, 100 block of Earl Garrett. For more information, please call (830)792-8395 or visit www.kerrvilletx.gov .

November 26 - 27 BOERNE:diCKens on Main Includes food and drink booths, costumed shop keepers, wassail, arts & crafts, caroling, Santa, live entertainment and more. Downtown streets of Historic Boerne. For more information, please call (830)249-7277.

November 26 - January 1 BOERNE: texas hill Country reGional ChristMas liGhtinG trail. Come home to the Hill Country for the holidays to the communities of Boerne, Burnet, Dripping Springs, Fredericksburg, Goldthwaite, Johnson City, Kerrville, Llano, Marble Falls, New Braunfels and Wimberley. Includes lighting displays, pageants and other festivities. For more information, please call (866)839-3378 or visit www.tex-fest.com.

November 26 - January 2 FREDERICKSBuRG:eisBahn. Outdoor ice-skating event benefits the Heritage School and the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. Marktplatz, corner of W. Main and N. Adams streets. For more information, please call (866)244-7897 or visit www.skateinfred.com .

November 27BANDERA:Country ChristMas BallKick off the holiday season with an event reminiscent of an old-fashioned dinner and barn dance. Farm Country Club. For more information, please call (830)589-7226 or visit www.farmcc.com.

COMFORT: ChristMas in CoMFortFeatures more than 150 arts & crafts booths, plus the lighted night parade, visits with Santa, a petting zoo, live music, food and more. Downtown Historic District. For more information, please call (830)995-3131 or visit www.comfortchamberofcommerce.com.

November 1 - 2 BOERNE:MariaChi los CaMPeros de nati CanoBoerne Charger High School. For more information, please call (830)896-5727 or visit www.kpas.org.

November 4 GRuENE: Walt WilKins & the MystiQueros. Begins at 6pm Gruene Hall, 1281 Gruene Road. For more information, please call (830)606-1281 or visit www.gruenehall.com.

November 5 BOERNE: hill Country house ConCerts Presents sinGer/sonGWriter john Wort hannaM. Alamo Fiesta RV Resort in Boerne. 7pm. Contribution to musician $12. Anyone seeking more info, please email [email protected] or visit www.houseconcertshillcountry.com .

FREDERICKSBuRG: First Friday art WalK. Nine local fine art galleries remain open until 8 pm so visitors have time to visit the various events and exhibits planned at each gallery throughout the day. Call for or stop by the Visitor Information Center, 302 E. Austin St., to pick up a list of participating galleries. For more information, please call (830)990-8151 or visit www.fbgartgallery.com.

November 6BOERNE: Fourth annual Veterans CuP. Join us for a 1860's style Vintage Base Ball Game. The Boerne Village Band will entertain. Boerne City Lake Park. 12pm. Free Admission. For more information, please call Kristy at 210-445-1080.

November 6BANDERA:hunters BarBeCue & outdoor exPoHosted on the eve of whitetail deer season, this annual event includes barbecue, exhibits, children's activities, entertainment and a Texas-sized auction. Doors open at 3pm. Serving begins at 5pm. Sponsored by the Bandera County Chamber of Commerce. Mansfield Park Show Barn. For more information, please call (830)796-3280 or visit www.banderahuntersbbq.com.

November 6, 13, 20, 27BANDERA:CoWBoys on MainFeatures a cowboy display in front of the Bandera County Courthouse and strolling Western entertainers on Main Street. Sponsored by the Frontier Times Museum Living History Project. Hours are 1 to 4 p.m. Main Street Bandera. For more information, please call (800)364-3833or visit www.frontiertimesmuseum.com.

November 7 FREDERICKSBuRG: harVest Fest GerMan Chorale ConCertConcert of German music features the Hermann Sons Mixed Choir and the Arion Maennerchor. St. Joseph's Hall, 212 W. San AntonioSt. For more information, please call (830)997-3936.

November 9 GRuENE: lyle loVett & his larGe Band Begins at 8pm Gruene Hall, 1281 Gruene Road. For more information, please call (830)606-1281 or visit www.gruenehall.com.

November 12 - 13 GRuENE: stoney larueGruene Hall, 1281 Gruene Road. For more information please visit www.gruenehall.com.

November 12 - December 4 FREDERICKSBuRG:ConteMPorary Masters inVitational art shoW. Features 12 artists showing new, original works. Fredericksburg Art Gallery, 314 E. Main St. For more information, please call(830)990-2707 or visit www.fbgartgallery.com .

November 13 BOERNE: seCond saturday art & Wine. Hop on the free trolley, stroll or drive to a collection of eclectic fine art galleries for free wine tasting, hors d'oeuvres and guest artists. Hours are 4 to 8pm. Boerne Visitor Center, 1407 S. Main. For more information, please call (877)833-0621, (830)249-1500 or visit www.secondsaturdayartandwine.com.

November 13 - 14 FREDERICKSBuRG: PaCiFiC CoMBat liVinG history re-enaCtMent. The World War II Combat Zone comes alive with 3 presentations daily at 10:30am, 1 and 3pm. National Museum of the Pacific War Combat Zone. For more information, please call (830)997-8600 or visit www.pacificwarmuseum.org.

November 15- December 17BOERNE: adVenture BootCaMP's holiday CaMP. Don't let the holidays get the best of you!Join Boerne Adventure Bootcamp and get the body youíve always wanted. Camp now located at Champion High School. Space is limited! For more information, please visit www.boernebootcamp.com or call (830) 370-0218.

November 19 - December 26 FREDERICKSBuRG: roCKBox ChristMas shoWHoliday show with live pop, rock, and country music; comedy; and seasonal favorites and carols. Rockbox Theater, 109 N. Llano St.. Please call (830)997-7625 or visit www.rockboxtheater.com.

NOVEMBERGet out and enjoy the Great texas hill Country!the most comprehensive events calendarsend submissions to [email protected]

Page 7: Explore | November 2010

November 2010 www.hil lcountryexplore.com 7

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Friday, November 5th: SONGWRITER’S CIRCLE hosted by Jessa Rew, 8 pm to Midnight, No Cover. Make history and sing at the first Songwriter’s Circle. Sign up early!Saturday, November 13th: MIKE BLAKELY Y LOS YAHOOS8 pm to Midnight, No Cover. Mike Blakely y los Yahoos are a combination of good blues, ballads, Conjunto and Cajun styles all rolled up into one great musical package. Whatever the root, you can surely find plenty of good music to two-stepthe night away.Friday, November 19th: SONGWRITER’S CIRCLE hosted by Jessa Rew, 8 pm to Midnight, No cover. Come sign up and sing at one of the oldest dance halls in Texas. Saturday, December 4th:LUCKY TUBB AND THE MODERN DAY TROUBADOURS 8 pm to Midnight. $10 Cover charge. Children 12 and under get in free. Lucky’s style is reminiscent of the raw and original country style of the earliest Nashville artists. Lucky Tubb and the Modern Day Troubadours create the sounds of lost highway joints and - will capture your attention with the sounds of trumpets, steel guitars and killer vocals! First 25 people to show up receive a free signature cowboy hat.

Page 8: Explore | November 2010

8 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.hillcountryclean.com 830.446.3252 Boerne, Texas

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Page 9: Explore | November 2010

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Page 10: Explore | November 2010

1 0 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.

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Page 11: Explore | November 2010

November 2010 www.hil lcountryexplore.com 1 1

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Page 12: Explore | November 2010

12 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.

Sometimes we go through life and learn a new skill or hobby, only to drop it out of boredom, or lack of time, or money to devote to it. If you are lucky, that hobby has a way of finding its way back into your life and catching your attention again. That happened to me this year. In middle school, I played the clarinet. When I began high school, I stopped playing it because I just couldn't fit band into my class schedule, which included art and agriculture (my dad was the ag teacher). The clarinet was sold and I never thought about it again for 27 years. That was until this year.

I started searching Ebay for a clarinet with the idea that it would be fun to play again. “After all,” I thought, “if I could learn how to play it

again, I could join the Boerne Village Band and wear

a cool German dress.” Did I

mention that

dressing up is another hobby for me? My search for a clarinet began. I was the winning bidder of a refurbished Noblet 45 wooden clarinet form the 1960's and an older metal Noblet clarinet from the 1930's. Vintage is always good, right?

After buying the clarinets, I then had to find the right mouthpiece. I searched online and read through the clarinet bulletin boards about numerous theories on what mouthpiece and reed combination is best. I decided on a custom made K14 by Walter Grabner and a Legere Quebec reed (made of plastic). With all of my purchases done and my savings account a lot smaller, I was ready to begin practice.

I set up a music area in the upstairs guestroom and began to play "Hot Cross Buns" and "Jingle Bells" from my "Accent on Achievement: Clarinet Book 1.” The music notes came back to me pretty fast. By the week's end I could play "William Tell Overture" and "When the Saints Go Marching In.” I thought I was good to go.

My friend, Yolanda, is in the Boerne Village Band, and she invited me to practice at the library. "Ok," I thought, “this is going to be great.” I gathered my music stand and clarinet and sat in the practice room in front of the saxophones and to the right of the percussion section. Yolanda was to the right of me with her R13 Buffet (one of the best-made clarinets around). The German sheet music folders were handed out and the conductor started everyone on the first song. Just looking at the notes, I thought "Oh no, I didn't practice these high notes." The music started and after the first measure I was lost. The music was fast, and it was difficult. I signed up with a clarinet teacher the following week.

After a month of clarinet lessons, I began to play better and I moved my music area outside onto the front porch of a little shed. I repainted the old cedar-sage green and painted the deck rail white. I painted the door red and added adornments to the roof-line to look "quaint.” The beer fridge was plugged in and stocked with beer and diet Vernor’s Ginger Ale. I bought cushions for the bench, plugged in an oscillating fan, and put in new bulbs into the light fixture. My clarinet shed was complete.

I practice every day out there on that little porch. The llamas like to lay by me and chew their cud. The horses graze near me when I am playing and the outdoor cat, Cocklebur, thinks clarinet time is her time to cuddle on my lap - which never works out for her. My dog, Porter, likes to lay by the clarinet hut, standing guard for any horses that try to reach over the fence into the good grass of the yard. Every so often, Porter will run up to the fence and belt out a few barks, then he retreats to his position of authority.

I started going to the Riverview Nursing home with my clarinet to entertain a lady that I knew there, Adela Frantzen. Her husband, Clifton, who was my friend that I knew form being a director at the Ag Museum had just passed away. At the

MUSICMOON RIVER

JOHHNY MERCER

THE TENNESSEE W

ALTZ RED S

TEW

ART

WHERE THE BO

YS ARE SUNG BY CON

NIE

FR

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CIS

RETURN TO MEKRISTY WATSON'S PASSION FOR MUSICBy Kristy Watson

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November 2010 www.hil lcountryexplore.com 13

nursing home, I talked with the lady in charge of activities, Tricia, who was excited that I would be coming. On my first visit, I met with Tricia who took me down a locked hallway where there are patients that need to be in a special area. We had to push a code to get inside. I took a seat in a small room and set up my music stand and began to play songs form the 1940's "Sentimental Journey" and "Don't Sit under the Apple Tree.” A few people started coming into the

room and sat down to listen. One man who came to listen was named

Michael O'Dowd. He seemed to really get into the music. I started to play songs from the

1950's, "Tennessee Waltz" and "Mr. Sandman.” By this time, Michael was orchestrating me, helping

me to keep the beat of the music. As I began to play songs form the 1960's, "Where the Boys Are" and

"Crazy,” Michael sat down at a keyboard and began to play. Even though the keyboard wasn't turned on, he could play every note and seemed to hear the music in his head. Talking to Michael, I learned that he was a musician, but all of the words that came out of his mouth were jumbled and didn't make much since. Together again we played songs form the 1970's, "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me" and "Do You Know Where You're Going To.” By the time we were finished, the room was full of people.

I left the nursing home and went straight to Hearts' Home Acoustics to buy a drum so that next time Michael could use it. I later learned that Michael has a master’s degree in music and has recorded with "Asleep at the Wheel" as well as other Texas bands. Before he had his stroke, he was a professional musician. Michael plays clarinet, saxophone, guitar, and piano. I did some research online and found that music therapy is good for stroke victims.

On my next visit to the nursing home, I brought the drum. Michael seemed to be excited about it. As I began to set up my music stand, a nurse asked Michael if he would like to have his clarinet. "Yes," he answered her. As I put my clarinet together, Michael also assembled his. I could see that his reed was broken and when Michael asked to use mine, I immediately gave him one of the extra cane reeds that I had. Michael began to play "Crazy" without even reading the notes to the music. I couldn't figure out how he was able to get the sounds out since his two bottom teeth were missing, but he

was somehow able to do it. I opened my sheet

music book on music from the 1940's and together we

played "I'm Beginning to See the Light" and "What's New."

What fascinated me was that Michael would follow the notes of the sheet

music sometimes, but I could hear him playing harmony - different notes that weren't

on the page. That's when I realized that I was playing with Michael, "the musician" and not Michael "the stroke

victim." Another thing I noticed on this day was that his words flowed better. His sentences were complete and there was less mumbling in his speech. After we were done playing, I asked Michael if he would be willing to teach me. He said, “Yes, I would be up to the challenge.”

My clarinet lessons from Michael O'Dowd, musician, are on Mondays at 3:00 pm down the left hallway at Riverview Nursing Home behind the monitored doorway. We have a number of older guests that listen to us play every week. Some are in wheelchairs, some have blank stares, some are clapping after every song, but all enjoy a little music to perk up their day.

Just recently, I met another clarinetist at a Boerne chamber mixer. Pierre Poree was playing in a Dixieland band at the Care Choice facility. During a break, I spoke with Pierre about my experience with clarinetist, Michael, who had a stroke.

“Michael O’Dowd? “ he asked. “Yes, that’s him. How do you know Michael? I wondered.“I used to play gigs with him, and I didn’t know where he

had gone,” Pierre told me. We agreed to get together to play with Michael in the future

at the nursing home. That day finally happened on October 11th, just a few days after Michael’s 66th birthday.

Pierre Poree and his family came from New Orleans after hurricane Katrina and has called San Antonio Home ever since. He plays with many different jazz bands in San Antonio.

When Michael sat down to play with Pierre again, things just clicked. I have been playing weekly with Michael now for over two months and this was the best he played since his stroke. Pierre looked at Michael and said, “Remember this one?” Pierre began to play “All of Me” and Michael picked up his clarinet and played, hitting every note. On the second verse, Pierre began to sing and Michael played solo in perfect form. I joined in on the next couple of 1940’s style tunes. I played the melody and tried to not mess up the song too much as Pierre and Michael played the harmony.

I asked a nurse that came into the room if she could take our picture. “Sure,” she said. Then she looked at Pierre and shouted, “You were my children’s band teacher in New Orleans!” What a small world it is. Pierre agreed to come back for another visit to play again with Michael in November.

On our last song, a couple of Michael’s good friends came into the room and sat down to meet him for dinner. “How did you find these clarinetists, Michael?’ they asked.

“That’s a long story,” he said.

DON'T SIT UN

DER THE APPLE TREE GLEN

N M

ILLER

MOON RIVER JOHHNY MERCER

THE TENNESSEE W

ALTZ RED S

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[email protected]

Page 14: Explore | November 2010

14 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.14 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.24137 Boerne Stage Road San Antonio, TX 78255 210.698.9365 210.410.3864

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The Lodge residents enjoy the luxurious interior of the spacious 10,000 square-foot Spanish style home. The home is surrounded by the breathtaking natural beauty of our 14-acre site. The property is graced with majestic trees, a natural spring with running stream and bubbling fountain in the courtyard. The Lodge is the comfort of home inside and out.

The Lodge offers individualized programs designed to meet your specific needs. Residents have choices from the very basic of services to the more specialized services that meet the needs of more complex problems, illnesses or recuperation.

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Page 15: Explore | November 2010

Book Your Holiday Parties Now!

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16 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.

SHOPPING

The holidays are almost upon us and what better time to pick up gifts for loved ones. We took a stroll down Main Street Boerne and found these must-have items for the Christmasseason.

Antler Basket Catrina's at the Ranch$499

ArtworkCatrina's at the Ranch$695

Big Buddha purseCeleste$76.00shoppingceleste.com

Page 17: Explore | November 2010

Lonesone Dove Coffee Table Book Soy Wax Candles, Sunny Creek Candle Co. $14.99 and $21.99Calamity Jane's$45

Ornaments-Pilgrim ImportsHandmade in WisconsinGiorgio's$14.99-17.99

Dress, Uncle Frank, $99Belt, $65Necklace, Rocky Gorman, $325Daisy Pearl

Gypsy Junkies TunicRewby's Boutique and Salon$60

Chan Luu Wrap BraceletsViva Rouge$80

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18 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.

By Marjorie Hagy

HISTORY

The gang I infiltrated call themselves the Table of Knowledge, and they operate right here in the heart of Boerne.Are they a secret society?

Are there secret rules, rites, mystical initiations which involve otherworldly language and funny hats? “If we’ve got any rules,” laughed

one John Eddy Vogt, unofficial leader of this unruly gang, “They’re so secret even I don’t know ‘em!” He considers for a moment. “Or hell, maybe I forgot ‘em.”

THE TABLEOFKNOWLEDGE

THE TABLEOFKNOWLEDGE

This month my assignment took me deep undercover, and one afternoon I found myself in a little Mexican café conferring with a band of rogues. The heat was brutal and unrelenting, dust hung in a haze over the Plaza as peasants passed along on their way to various tasks, and I sat under the steady whirr and tick of a lazy ceiling fan, at long last in the very presence of these mysterious men. We’ve all read about the escalating drug wars and violence in Ciudad Juarez and, indeed, all along the border- but this has nothing to do with all that. The gang I infiltrated call themselves the Table of Knowledge, and they operate right here in the heart of Boerne.

Are they a secret society? I’m bold enough to ask the hard-hitting questions that make other reporters blanch. Are there secret rules, rites, mystical initiations which involve otherworldly language and funny hats? “If we’ve got any rules,” laughed one John Eddy Vogt, unofficial leader of this unruly gang, “They’re so secrete even I don’t know ‘em!” He considers for a moment. “Or hell, maybe I forgot ‘em.”

Hmmm…canny, Mr. Vogt.No, these wastrels are bold-faced enough

to meet right out in the open. Just about any weekday afternoon they can be found at their headquarters at Sely’s Restaurant. And there’s a plaque right on the wall that announces that this is their turf. “Table of Knowledge” it proclaims, “Disorganized since way back when.” And “way back when” seems about right. I asked how long, and the consensus seemed to be wa-ay back. Forty years? I pressed (I’ve seen a picture of them from about that long ago). Oh, probably longer than that, they figured. Fifty?? Somewhere along in there, they allowed.

So just who ARE these men? Well, having heard vague rumors of their existence for a long time, I decided to make it my mission to find out. After debating with myself whether to assume a disguise in order to embed myself in their midst and attempt to pass myself off as a conservative Republican gentleman of a certain age, I reluctantly scrapped the idea as far-fetched. Passing myself off as a

pictured fro left toright clockwise:Robert M, (Mac) George,Bill Ragsdale,John Eddie Vogt, Sidney L. Voges,andGeorge Edensberger

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November 2010 www.hil lcountryexplore.com 19

marjorie @hillcountryexplore.com

gentleman of a certain age, I had every confidence I could do, but I know I would have considerable trouble with the other part. So I adopted the simple, expedient method of hitting my father up for an invite. He’s a fairly recent recruit, and when he put the suggestion to the fellas, they were gracious enough to let me sit in on a session. Thus, I found myself one afternoon actually seated at the renowned and mysterious Table of Knowledge.

There was Freddy Grisham and Bob Magers, Wally Whitworth and John Hagy (definitely NOT the preacher) , a guy named Cowboy Culver, and one they called the Ragin’ Cajun, Harold Lambert and Robert Prentiss and two Eds, Wagner and Beauford, and the garrulous John Eddy Vogt. Not all the gang was there, daily attendance is not required but the guys say their wives prefer them to attend as often as possible. The guys are, in fact, mostly conservative gents of a distinguished seniority, except I was sorta surprised to see one guy there about my own age—now I’m no spring chicken, but I did feel kinda dewy compared to these old boys. “I once changed our sign to say ‘Table of Senility’ instead of ‘Table of Knowledge’,” John Eddy said, wagging to indicate their plaque. “And do you know nobody even noticed it for three weeks!” They all laughed. They laugh a lot, and mostly at themselves.

But if these guys have been getting together for high on fifty years, where have they been meeting all this time? Sely’s hasn’t been there that long. Well, they’ve met at La Hacienda Restaurant, at Ebner’s Drug Store for a while, at the old deli that used to be up on Main Street where the Appraisal District is now, at the long-defunct P&G’s (Paul & Gertrude’s) next door to Ebner’s and elsewhere. “That’s one of the things we feel kinda bad about,” one of the guys said. “Whenever we meet someplace, they always go outta business!” And at least one place even went so far as to throw ‘em out and ban ‘em from the place—not because they were bad for business though. What happened was, during a particularly heated discussion, tempers suddenly flared and one guy ended up chucking his coffee into the other one’s face! "What was the fight about?" I wanted to know. “Politics!” they all shouted above the laughter. And you get the sense that even in the midst of all the brouhaha and pulling the two combatants off each other and getting tossed outta the joint, they were even then storing up the incident, turning it into the best story so they could tell the tale on themselves at the table in their new place.

Politics. I’d already pretty much deduced that any group my dad belonged to wasn’t likely to be a hotbed of liberalism, but here I was in for a little bit

of a surprise. “Oh, we got some Democrats!” the guys told me, and while they were listing off fellow members they hollered about one of the names, “Oh he’s one! Put a big D by his name!” So while the table does lean heavily to the right, there are a few liberals in the bunch (hence the coffee throwing affair).

I asked them what they talk about, around their small-town, rural Algonquin Round Table. “We talk about who’s dead,” Wally said. “And who’s not lookin’ so good.”

“We talk about everybody who doesn’t show up,“ Bob added. “That’s why I try to always be here!”

They told me they talk about the “usual things”-guns, hunting, veggies.

“'Remember when?'” Freddy said. “That’s a big one.”

“Yeah!” Gabe Nunex called down the table—he’s the Ragin’ Cajun. “Remember when? And I wish I still could!”

“Hearing is a recurring issue here,” said another guy. “Oh yeah,” someone else chimed in, “’What?’ and ‘Huh?’ are the most frequent things we say!”

“Hell, we’ve been meeting so long now we all know everybody else’s jokes,” John Eddy said, “Now when we wanna tell a joke all we gotta say is ‘Number four!’” And all the fellas holler out ‘Number four!” in unison. Even that has become one of their old jokes!

Of course, these guys aren’t all the original crew, not after fifty-some years of this business, and many members have moved on to that Big Table in the Sky, but still fondly remembered around the Sely’s table. Seems like all the old Boerne names once gathered around- Levi Zoeller, George Ebensberger, Cliff Bruce, JL Dudley, to name a few. George Quick, the guys told me, is the last remaining WWII vet of the crew, and they tell me he used to pilot Air Force Two- the Vice President’s plane. Within these guys’ memories lie all kinds of Boerne history- these were the boys who were born here when this was still a one-horse berg and folks still conducted their business in German, whose fathers and grand-fathers and whose own hands built up this town. “I was born in that old house right next door to the fire house, and I still can’t figure out one thing,” John Eddy Vogt mused. It was a rare and serious moment around the table, and the men sat, hushed. “And that’s why there’s still no historical marker on that house!” The guys around the table roared.

They all remember when the pole holding up the awning outside John Eddy’s store on Main Street was a regular meeting place, and they all perfectly remember John Eddy’s store. “He’d pat you on the

back with one hand,” one of ‘em recalled. “And pick your pocket with the other!” They remember a guy who lived over on a place over off Hosack Street during the war, when there were still farms butting up to Main Street, who rode his horse to town and went around his home-place naked, and whom the Secret Service finally arrested as a spy who’d been mapping out Camp Bullis for the Germans. They remember a teacher, Miss Lohmann, who grew up in Luckenbach and spanked kids for speaking German in school, and another one they called Old Lady Toepperwein who’d have her German-speaking first-graders speaking English in a month.

I wanted to stay and listen to their stories and laugh with ‘em and pick their brains, for days, and get everything they remember. These old guys are the history of Boerne , in a Boerne that is itself passing into history. And as my old hometown changes out of all recognition all around us, I’m happy the old boys of the Table of Knowledge are still meeting, still holding court, keeping their fingers on the pulse of this old town, keeping the old torch lit.

I never have thought before that the occasion would ever arise in which I really would want to pass as a conservative Republican gentleman of a certain age, but I had so much fun with the guys sitting around the Table of Knowledge that I just might show up there someday disguised in a beard and a pair of bib-overalls with a Bush/Cheney button…well, maybe just the beard and overalls.

*I wrote this story to appear last month, but right after I met with the Table of Knowledge they lost one of their own, Dick Magers, whose brother Bob is also a member in good standing, and I decided to keep this story back for a month. Dick was much loved by the fellas around the Table, and whenever they meet and raise a cup of coffee or fight about politics and talk about their gardens or their guns, he’ll be right there with ‘em in spirit.

Peace, fellas.

[email protected]

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20 eXPLore it! L ive it! the reAL KeNdALL CouNty.1. Candy Apples 2. Paper Hand Turkeys 3. Cozy Fire 4. Leftover Halloween Candy 5. Grandpa's House 6. Corn Bread Stuffing 7. Sweaters 8. Its A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving GOOD GRIEF! 9. The Nut Bowl 10. Indian Corn 11. The Dishes!!!! 12. Are You Ready For Some Football!

1

4

7

10 12

8 9

5 6

3

ovemberN in a nutsh e ll

2

11

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Page 22: Explore | November 2010

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518 River Road, Boerne, TX | www.littlegretel.com | 830-331-1368

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Page 24: Explore | November 2010

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SCHOOLEYFOR

MAYOR

A few months back, I announced via my Publisher’s Letter that I, Ben Schooley, would be running for President. Like everyone, I’m pretty sick and tired of the same old song-and-dance out of Washington, so I promised to tear down the IRS, require drug tests for welfare, and even to not require taxes of anyone over the age of 80 because they should be hugging grandkids, not worrying about tax responsibilities.

FEATURE

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This letter generated a lot of feedback, and according to this feedback, I have exactly 19 votes for President. 19 votes. Obviously, there is still some work to do. Additionally, I checked my campaign bank balance and the “Ben for Prez 2012 Campaign” has $6. 6 bucks!! This isn’t going to cut it.

So as I read my favorite newspaper EVER, the Boerne Star, a light bulb came on for me. President of the united States is a pretty lofty goal. It might take me six or seven months to earn enough money to actually campaign for President. I mean, once the word got out about my rock-solid political career and business acumen, the money would certainly come pouring in, but seven months is a really long time and I’ll probably get bored with the idea by then anyway. So as I read my favorite newspaper, I read about some pretty amazing things that our local government is up to. Things that made my head want to explode.

So instead of President of the united States, I think I’ll run for Mayor of Boerne. Yup, you read it here first: Schooley for Mayor.

I’ve lived in Boerne since ’87 or thereabouts, so I’ve been around long enough to understand what Boerne uSED to look like. I’m not saying that’s a prerequisite for the Mayor, but it does help to know how much things have changed around here, and to understand some of the ways that improper and unregulated GROWTH have hurt our town. My job also requires me to be closely connected to the local business community, and so I have a pretty good perspective on how they feel. I work closely with the arts community, the media, and the City. All in all, I’m a pretty well-rounded candidate.

Now, all that being said, I have no idea how city government works. This is my real selling point. I don’t know how it works, and I don’t care. I don’t care because it doesn’t work. It doesn’t work because government, at EVERY SINGLE LEVEL, has forgotten who they are actually working for. They’re working for ME, and YOu, and my crazy neighbor. They only have jobs because WE gave it to them, and it’s time for them to remember that. So here are my key points for election. This is not a completely comprehensive list, but it was the best I could do when under a deadline.

1.GROWTH. This is a big deal for Boerne. KB, Centex, Armadillo…they have gotten used to coming into Boerne, buying a beautiful 100 acre ranch and slamming 1000 houses in. They then pack up and split. No more. They are welcome to come here (because people need homes) but they must work with the City on traffic issues. THEY will pay for turn lanes. They will do whatever is needed to ensure that their new development does not clog our streets, dirty our creeks, or ruin the ambiance. If they do not follow the rules, they are banned forever.

2. I’M SELLING THE DOLLAR GENERAL FOR $1.4M. The City bought the old Dollar General for $740k. Then they spent $380k renovating it so that the Appraisal District could move offices. The employees of the District said their current offices were “fine”. I’m selling the Dollar General for $1.4m. And you Appraisal District employees can go right back to your “fine” offices.

7. Lastly, I’M SELLING EVERY SINGLE CITY-OWNED BUILDING. City Hall, the new courthouse, smaller business offices….they’re all gone. We will work from modular office buildings up on the north end of town where real estate is cheap. We’ll sell the current buildings, take the profit to buy our cheap modular buildings and put the rest of it toward street and drainage improvements. We don’t need grand historical buildings to run a small town. We need computers, phones, and desks. That’s it. And can someone PLEASE explain to me why we sequester staff at the old City Hall behind giant panes of glass, forcing customers to talk to us through little holes in the glass? It’s insulting to the customer (the citizen that is paying YOUR salary). So those are coming down, too.

We hear all day long about how BIG GOVERNMENT is broken, and it is. However, small local government is certainly broken as well. And while I don’t have the resume for politics, I do have a brain and understand the difference between right and wrong. And that’s something that I think is missing today. When Obama tries to throw us over $200k to install silly solar panels, why don’t we ask “Should we bother doing this?” Instead, we take the money and spend it as fast as we can. And that’s too bad.

Boerne is one of the greatest places on earth. It’s beautiful, full of great people, and it’s a joy to raise a family here. This is because of the environment that WE as a society have created, and is in spite of inept government interference.

So here’s to “Schooley for Mayor”. While I won’t get elected, maybe I can aggravate people enough to at least question things that are out of whack. And there’s a LOT that is out of whack.

Ben Schooley is Publisher of EXPLORE magazine. He lives in a fairy tale land where right and wrong dominate, where politicians are simple people that want to better society, and where good people meet for coffee and discuss the things that affect them. And then they go to work. At a private job. A job where they dream of ways to help everyone around them without the aid of politicians.

3. I WILL TEAR DOWN THOSE SOLAR PANELS. The City spent $165k putting solar panels on Fair Oaks Elementary. Then they took an additional $225k of “Obama-money” to complete. That’s $390k. The projected savings is $5700/year. The City applauded itself for this wonderful project. I want to kick them for wasting almost $400k of OuR money on something silly. I will tear down these solar panels, get a refund, and send the $225k from Obama to Hill Country Daily Bread.

4. I'M PADLOCKING THE POST OFFICE.The Post Office. I’ve had it with you. I can’t even

tell you just how bad I’ve had it with you, other than to say I’ve had it with you. So here’s the deal: clean up your service, or I’m padlocking the front doors. I don’t care if you are a federal government operation…your time is up. If you don’t clean it up, I’m going to call a local food pantry, get the names of people that are down on their luck, and let them deliver the mail. They will cherish their jobs and their paycheck and not take it for granted. This is your last warning Post Office.

5. ASSIGNED BUSINESS LIASONS.The City makes things too complicated for

new businesses. Between the crazy Historical Committee, zillions of signage requirements, asinine zoning, and crummy service from inspectors….well, it’s a pain to open a business in Boerne. under my plan, when you file your papers to open your business, you will be assigned a liaison. One person will become your guide through the requirements of City Hall. And you will also be handed my cell phone number. If you have ANY problems, I want to know about it. Small business is the lifeblood of Boerne, and I’m tired of how we treat them.

6. I’M TEARING OUT DUMB STOPLIGHTS. TX Dot. I’m tired of you. The intersection at

Boerne Stage Rd. and I-10 used to work fine. Then you came in and put in stoplights and the intersection is a nightmare now. So I’m tearing them down. You are from the government, and you are not here to help.

VOTEBENJAMIN SCHOOLEY

MAYOROF BOERNE, TEXAS

[email protected]

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Change Your Landscape.

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Country Home Learning Center

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• Country Home Waterpark and Splashdeck• Adventure Jungle Indoor Playground• Large Indoor Gym and Basketball Court• Putt-Putt Golf Course• 1950’s Style Soda Shop• Country Home Movie Theater• Computer Lab• Arts and Crafts Lab• Horseback Riding at Country Home Ranch

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Page 29: Explore | November 2010

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Country Home Learning Center

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• Country Home Waterpark and Splashdeck• Adventure Jungle Indoor Playground• Large Indoor Gym and Basketball Court• Putt-Putt Golf Course• 1950’s Style Soda Shop• Country Home Movie Theater• Computer Lab• Arts and Crafts Lab• Horseback Riding at Country Home Ranch

Come See Our Beautiful, New State-Of-The-Art Facility

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Page 30: Explore | November 2010

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The Dodging DuckBrewhaus & Restaurant TAP

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this month:Dodging Duck Pumpkin Pie Ale

Pico de Pato Hatch Green Chile AleGolden Egg Creme Ale

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On August 1, 2002, we introducted craft beer to Boerne. We brew in a 10 barrel Bohemian Brewery system right here at the Duck. We store our fresh, unfiltered beer at 34o and serve it from stainless steel serving tanks through chilled lines. It has virtually no contact with light or air until it hits your glass, for the best tasting beer you’ll ever experience! We are brewing different beers all the time, so selections are subject to change. Cheers!830-248-3825 • www.dodgingduck.com

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Page 31: Explore | November 2010

November 2010 www.hil lcountryexplore.com 31

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Love, is the most painful thing I know. It defines us and destroys us. Sometimes it holds passion, always it holds understanding. Love is accept-ing and unconditional. Love is dangerous. Love is exhilarating, empowering, and empathetic. Love is fragile, lonely, and helpless. Love holds our greatest peril and opportunity. Without love, life is bland, colorless, empty, alone, undefined. If we reach for it, we may fall; if we do not reach, we will never know what it is to fly. Love, is the most painful thing I know.

The first time I fell in love it was with a puppy. His name was Thor. He was black with a wet nose and white feet and a little white blasé upon his chest. I like to think that he loved me too. My dad and I built a kennel for him behind the house. It was roomy, and I felt good about the new home we pro-vided for him. It was important to me that he was happy. I loved him.

As he began to grow into his feet, he also began doing what dogs do. He dug things, and chewed things, and barked at things, and one day he got so excited that he jumped up and scratched my sister. He didn’t mean anything by it…he just wanted to be loved. The time came when my parents sat me down and told me that Thor was getting too big. They told me that the best thing I could do for him was to put him up for adoption so that perhaps a family with a farm would give him a home. I will never forget how he looked at me when I handed his leash to the woman at the pound. We both cried that day.

The reason love hurts is because it matters. Love is worth it. I would not choose to live a loveless life, because it would not be a life worth living. When you think about it, pain is really no big deal. It comes with the territory. It means you are feel-ing something and that means you are alive. I will not stop running, happy through a summer field

because I might scrape my knee. I will not stop climbing because I might fall. I will never stop lov-ing because sometimes it hurts. That’s life. Love is worth it.

One day, my best friend from the Marines died. I will never forget standing next to his casket, miss-ing him, and wondering why he had to go. That was silly. Dave never really left me. I remember when we would get together and laugh so hard that people would start to stare at us. One time, in a restaurant, I expected the management to ask us to leave. After all, why should we be allowed to laugh so hard that we upset all the unhappy diners? We both cried that day. Now so many years after his pass-ing, I often feel that he is still with me, because he is. That is how love works. When we love someone, nothing they can ever do will change that, even if they die. Because of love, they live forever. Today when I think of my friend, I remember the laughter.

I have a best friend, who I love. We have helped each other through many hard times. We trained for almost a year to run our first marathon together. Mile after mile we supported each other, running side by side, in good times and bad, pushing up the long hill along the base of the dam and up past our favorite house. Sometimes we would train in the park running and walking quickly up the steep hills. There was a great stone on the far side of the steepest hill where we would stop and rest and look through the branches of a great old tree. We would talk of our training and of life and of overcoming hardship. My friend is like a painting that people see but never truly understand, they do not see past the shapes and colors to the poetry hidden beneath the canvas: but I do. One day, I realized that I could not run as fast as she needed me to. As she pulled away off into the distance I found myself running alone once again. It was sad for me, but it changes nothing. She needed to keep running, that

is the way of things. I will try my best to be there at the finish line cheering her onward. Love is like that: unconditional.

My wife and I met in Rome some 28 years ago. She is petite, and quiet, but has the heart of a lion. Together, we have climbed mountains in Italy, stalked wounded game through thorn bush of Africa, and went scuba diving over the reefs of Grand Cayman. We have struggled through near poverty while chasing a dream in Montana, and she has been by my side as I endured great hardship and heartbreak. Sometimes, we have let each other down… nothing purposeful, just the result of real life and real humanity. Still, there has always been love. That is how love is: it endures beyond the hardship…beyond the heartbreak.

There are places and things that I love. There are hillsides, mountaintops, beaches, and chairs where I once sat. There was my childhood along the sea shore, my youthful illusions in Rome, my heartfelt homeland in Africa, my space in time in the Texas Hill Country. There are people who I love. My fam-ily and dearest friends all define me in some way. And, when someone who I love has left it unre-turned, it may hurt, but it does not diminish me.

Love is the most powerful thing I know. It teaches us how to live for something greater than our-selves. It teaches us to take risk, to have faith, to step forward into the uncertain wind. Love makes us strong, even as we feel weakened by its loss, its memory, its shadow. When I look into the happy eyes of my daughter, and I hear her laughter, and I see her future: I know the power of love. When we love someone, truly and without condition, we ex-tend ourselves. It is the truest form of courage, and although it is a part of being alive, love lives longer than we do. I would not want to live a loveless life. Love, is the most powerful thing I know.

CHRONICLESTEXAS HILL COUNTRY

By Steve Ramirez

LOVE

[email protected]

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However, even Chilito’s tacos are different and have a gourmet spin. One of the most popular is the “Worst Taco” made with beans, cheese, onions, potatoes and drizzled with a signature sauce and topped with a choice of steak, roasted pork or a mixture of meats. All meat has been prepared with care and marinated for hours to ensure tenderness and flavor.

Picnic tables are available if you want to sit down and enjoy a meal and awnings are on the way for winter time but a majority of people call in orders to be picked up at lunch time. Everything on the menu is well under $10.

If you have a special event Maldonado will come to you. Chilito’s Express served food for 120 hungry patrons recently at a Champion High School event.

Chilito’s Express is also taking holiday tamale orders through November 20th.

Hours are from 7:00am-2:00pm

Across town, another on-the-go eatery has emerged. Prominently visible outside of the Boerne SPCA, Zuko Dogs is serving up American-style hotdogs with a Puerto Rican twist. Tony and Rosana Santiago moved to Boerne from Puerto Rico a year ago to pursue a better education for their children. Both had worked in the film industry in Puerto Rico, Rosana as a camera assistant and Tony as an animal trainer. In fact, Tony was voted ‘Dog Trainer of the Year’ in Puerto Rico three times. Due to tax breaks for Hollywood, many big-budget films have been shot in Puerto Rico, including The Hulk, The Losers, and Fast and the Furious. Do you remember seeing a dauchsand in Men Who Stare at Goats? Well, that was the Santiagos’ dog Zuko, the namesake for the hotdog stand, making his big screen début.

The hot dog stand came into being because of Tony’s love of hotdogs. After staying in Boerne for a while he noticed that there wasn’t any sort of street

food around Boerne, which is very common in Puerto Rico.

A Zuko hotdog starts off with a 100% all beef hotdog, then is slathered in Tony’s special sauce and topped with your choice of toppings including crispy potato strips and onions. Portions are available as regular or extra-large dogs and vegetarian and chili dogs are also available. You can purchase just a hotdog or a combo for under $5.

Need ideas for your good deed of the day? A portion of Zuko’s proceeds go to benefit the SPCA.

Zuko has catered several local events including the Cibolo Nature Center’s Art for Kids and Science and Nature Programs, as well as providing concessions all summer long at the Boerne Public Pools. Zuko is also available for birthdays or back yard barbeques.

Zuko is open Monday through Friday 11:00-2:30 and some Saturdays.

ON THE GO: ON THE GO: TWO NEW ROADSIDE HOTSPOTS TO CHECK OUT

DINING

By Alison Turner

[email protected]

Chilitos Express

Zuko Dogs

You may have noticed a couple of new eateries in town. They may not have tablecloths or waiters but these bare-bone eateries serve up great food when you’re on the run.

In the past couple of years, mobile dining has made a resurgence and not just in the Big City but here in Boerne as well. I stopped by Chilito’s Express and Zuko Dogs to get the scoop on the food and the people behind it.

Located at John’s Road and I-10 in the parking lot next to The Biggest Antique Mall in Town, the first thing you see when you drive up to Chilito’s Express is a sign exclaiming “Crazy Good Gourmet Tamales” and I must attest they are pretty good. Owned and operated by Alfonso Maldonado, or simply “Al” as he’s known to his patrons, Chilito’s offers a number of unique Latin-fusion dishes.

“Food has always been my passion,” Maldonado said. “My mother’s side of the family is Italian and it’s a very food-centric culture. They always say, ‘Are you hungry? Are you hungry?’”

Maldonado had been thinking about opening a restaurant for six years and after much research he decided to start smaller with a catering trailer. “Normally restaurants start out with the main restaurant and then branch out into catering with a catering trailer. I thought it would be a good idea to do the opposite and start with the catering trailer and really perfect my flavors,” Maldonado said.

Chilito’s food is very clean—very little grease and plenty of spice and flavor. The spice combinations are unique drawing on South American cuisines. “There’s lots of Mexican and Tex-Mex cuisine here in Texas but somewhat less food diversity than what I experienced when I lived in Miami,” Maldonado said. “I saw a hole in the market and decided this was what Boerne needed.”

Everything is made to order. Menu items include gourmet tamales made with chicken cream cheese or cream cheese jalapeno, fresh bakes sautéed beef empanadas, a slew of Latin American inspired sandwiches and, of course, tacos.

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spiritual

EVOLUTION VS creationismBy Kendall Aaron

[email protected]

Occassionally, I like to write about evolution and creationism. I like to do it because it irritates a lot of people, and inspires others. Far and away, my articles about creationism foster the greatest response from the public. Well, except for that time I wrote about a church that changed costumes between services. That article REALLY irritated some people. And I got no less than two dozen invitations to some great churches. And that article is still one of the favorite ones I’ve written.

But I digress.Evolution cracks me up. I literally chuckle at it. I

find it so fun because “believers” of evolution are just that: believers in FAITH. They work so hard to discredit a creationist’s faith as not being scientific, but not one scientist has EVER proven a single aspect of evolution. So guess what that makes it? A FAITH BASED VIEW. You (as the evolutionist) are choosing a faith, and you trust that your theories are true. Nobody was there to see God create the earth, and nobody was there to see a fish crawl out of the ocean and become a lizard. So we have these theories and we simply must believe.

We’ve all heard about how the Grand Canyon took umpteen billion years to carve into the desert. Every scientist said it was impossible for water to carve rock quickly. Creationists argue that Noah’s Flood carved that canyon. Evolutionists laughed. Then a few summers ago Canyon Lake spilled over the dam. It dug a trench over 80 feet deep in a matter of days through solid rock. This was supposed to be impossible, and scientists still have no explanation for it.

In England, there is a tourist attraction called the Petrifying Well. Little more than a small waterfall, it’s somewhere that an evolutionist doesn’t want you to go. The water has a very high mineral

content, and tourists have great fun putting simple objects beneath the water and allowing them to “fossilize”. A teddy bear was placed there, and within six months, it was turned to solid stone. There are objects that are placed there, and within 50 years, the items have been completely swallowed by the ever-growing wall of stone. So much for fossils taking millions upon millions of years to form, huh?

In 2007, outside Tanzania, some local fisherman hauled up a Coelacanth. That doesn’t sound like big news, except that it’s supposed to be extinct. Museums have a whole bunch of fossils of this fish, and proclaimed that it was extinct as of 80 million years ago. And guess what? It hasn’t evolved not one bit in 80 million years. Of course, an evolutionist will say that it didn’t evolve because it didn’t need to. Just like the alligator, snake, whale, shark, jellyfish, frog, and millions of other animals. So you see, animals only evolve when evolutionists need them to. Like man. Apparently it’s too far a leap to think “Maybe God made them, and He got them right the first time.”

Speaking of fossils, could someone identify ONE transitional fossil ever found? Nope. That’s because they don’t exist. There has never been a fossil found of a Neanderthal, a velociraptor with feathers, or any other fossil depicting an animal changing from one to another. Evolutionists will find a fossilized tooth in some remote rain forest and via this one tooth, recreate their vision for early-man. They can take a fossilized raptor with a feather beside and it and proclaim that it obviously shows that many dinosaurs evolved into birds. This is why I chuckle at evolution. So an 800 pound dinosaur became a cardinal? Or a vulture? Or a hawk? Really?

In 1924, an archaeology expedition in Mongolia found several hundred fossilized human skeletons along with the bones of several dinosaurs, insects “of enormous size” and several dozen “unidentified fossilized remains.” In 2000, outside Glen Rose, Texas, scientists unearthed a rock with a big dinosaur footprint on it. While that’s nothing to get worked up over, the problem was that on the same rock (in the same geologic column) is a human footprint. uh-oh. Of course evolutionists claimed this and that, so the guy that found it had a CT scan done on it, and carbon dating. Both proved that the footprints were done at the same time. Double uh-oh. No evolutionist has yet to find a way to dispute this find. In 1944, a ten year old boy in Michigan had a lump of coal. Of course, coal is millions of years old because that’s how long it takes to form coal. Guess what was in that lump of coal? A small bell. The bell was sent for analysis and it was found that it contained a mix of metals that was unknown to the modern world. It now sits in a Creation Museum as further evidence of God’s creation.

If you are a staunch evolutionist or a passionate creationist, both sides have something in common: FAITH. The evolutionist has completely determined to remove God from the origins of the earth, and the creationist faithfully believes what God has told him/her via the Bible.

In the end, I’ll hedge my bets with the only theory that leads me to eternal grace and salvation. Plus, God’s account of His creations is WAY cooler than thinking we all evolved from some single-celled organism. Oh, and that single-celled organism…wonder where that came from?

[email protected]

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