information for parents: discipline - parenting counts · information for parents: discipline what...
Post on 10-Apr-2018
212 Views
Preview:
TRANSCRIPT
What is Discipline?
To discipline means to teach. Discipline is
not punishment. Discipline means providing
guidelines and support for young children
while they are learning how to manage their
emotions, deal with disappointment or
frustration, and form relationships with other
people. Effective discipline means teaching
children to behave in ways that support the
values of their family, society and culture.
Discipline is not something to do after a
child misbehaves, but is an ongoing way of
interacting with a child that encourages good
behavior, discourages bad behavior, and yes,
addresses misbehavior when it occurs.
Why Discipline Matters
Discipline has long-term benefits for parent and child.
Researchshowsthatadisciplinestyleof“limitsetting”isassociatedwithpositiveoutcomesforchildren.Suchastyleischaracterizedbypayingattentiontochildren’sfeelings,usingappropriatedistractions,explainingthereasonsforalimittothechild,andhelpingthechildsucceedinstayingwithinthelimitsset.
• Whenparentsusedlimitsetting,theirchildrenwerebetterabletowaitforsomethingtheywanted,betterabletogetalongwithpeers,andmoreconfidentinsocialsituations.
The best kinds of discipline build trust.
Researchalsoshowsuswhichdisciplinemethodsdon’twork.Severalstudieshavefoundthatharshtacticssuchasspankingarenoteffective.Suchmethodsdonotsupportachild’sdevelopmentalprogresstowardsself-control.
• Sensitive,yetfirmlimitsettingasadisciplinemethoddoesmuchmorethansimplychangeachild’sbehavior.Italsobuildstrustandrespectforconsequences.
InformatIon for Parents:
Discipline
InformatIon for Parents:Discipline
What Parents Can Do
Be Consistent
First,rememberthatwhatevertheageofyourchild,it’simportanttobeconsistentwhenitcomestodiscipline.Ifyoudon’tsticktotherulesandconsequencesyousetup,yourchildrenaren’tlikelytoeither.
Consider your child’s age:
Infants:Duringthefirst18months,focusonteachingyourchildhowtointeractwiththethingsandpeopleinhisworld.Babiesandtoddlersarenaturallycurious.Whenpossible,planaheadandremovefragileitemsthatyourbabymightbecuriousaboutorthataredangerous.
toddlers: Atthisage,childrenbegintodifferentiatethemselvesfromtheircaregiversandwillstarttoasserttheirowndecisionmaking.Thisisagoodtimeforparentstostepinwithguidanceandteaching.
Preschoolers: Thisiswhenchildrenbecomemoreawareofactionsandconsequences.Communicatetherulesandexpectationsofyourhomeandfamily.Follow-throughisimportantandconsistencyisthekey!
Remember that there are three ways to discipline:
1. encourage good behavIor
Usepraise,rewards,andmodeling.Modeldesiredbehaviorandacknowledgeyourownerrorstoteachchildrenwhatisexpectedofthemandteachesthem,andthatitisoktomakemistakes.
Setclearrulesandexplainwhytheserulesareimportant.Besurethechildknowswhattoexpectbeforedisciplining
foranunacceptablebehavior.Settheseboundariesandexpectationsearly,beforechallengingsituationsarise.
Makerequestsinshort,easytounderstandphrases.
2. Prevent mIsbehavIor
Offerchoices:Oneofthewaychildrenexpresstheirindependenceisbymakingchoices.Forexample,allowyourchildtochoosehisownclothingorsnack.Thisgiveshimasenseofcontrolandreducesthelikelihoodofdisagreement.
Distraction:Thisissimplyre-directingachild’sattentionfromanundesirablebehaviortosomethingelse.Thoughitiscriticaltoobservecuesandrespectemotions,distractioncanbeveryeffective,especiallywithtoddlersandpreschoolers.
Childrenaremorelikelytomisbehavewhentheyarehungry,tired,orfeelingleftout,sotrytoanticipateyourchild’sneeds.
3. resolve Problem behavIor
Time-out: Manyparentshavereportedthattime-outsareaneffectivedisciplinechoice.Thisisespeciallytrueforbehaviorsthatareintentionalorwhenthetime-outhasbeenanagreeduponresponsetoarepeatedbehavior.
Aswithmostparentingtechniques,timeoutsarelessabouttheactionitselfandmoreabouthowthetimeoutisperceivedbythechild.Thegoalistoprovideclarityabouttheactofmisbehaviorwhileshowingsensitivitywithintheparent-childcontext
Discipline is one of the most important parts of parenting. Dealingwithamisbehavingchildisreallyjustoneverysmallpartofdiscipline,andachildwhoothersmaycall“well-behaved”isprobablynotachildwhoisfrequentlypunished.Rather,heislikelyachildwhosedaysarefilledwithcommunicationwithhisparentsandcaregiversandachildwhounderstandslimitsandexpectations.Thoughtofthisway,disciplineissimplyanotherstepinpreparingyourchildforfuturehappinessandsuccess,andanessentialpartoftheparent-childrelationship.Itdoesn’thavetobeunpleasant,anditcanmakefamilylifemorefunandjoyful.
top related