creating respectful relationships

Creating Respectful

Relationships

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What do you think sexual harassment is?

Examples of Sexually Harassing Behavior… Someone pinching you. A group of boys or girls following you down the

hall everyday from class to class. Someone calling you sexually explicit names.

Someone saying to you, “You look great in that outfit.”

Your name and phone number written on the bathroom wall.

Someone asking if you are attracted to them. Someone posting your picture online without your permission.

Overhearing a group of people whispering when you walk by.

Two key words in sexual harassment are:

unwelcome and repeated .

The target and the source

can be any gender and any

age.

Types of Sexual Harassment Verbal or WrittenPhysical

Verbal or Written Sexual Harassment

Can happen in person, online or on a cell phone.

Boasting about sexual experience Comments about someone’s body or appearance Comments about someone’s sexual orientationJokes of a sexual nature or explicit noises Sexual advances or suggestions Sexual graffiti Showing offensive picturesRumors or threats Objectifying someoneRating someone on a scale

Includes:

Physical Sexual Harassment

No unwante

d behavior

is accepta

ble.

Cornering someone

Gestures

Grabbing or touching

Intentionally brushing up against a person’s bodyPulling on someone’s clothes

Includes:

Pinching or smacking

Sexual Harassment vs. Sexual Misconduct

Sexual Misconduct

Is consensual between the parties.

One participant may be in a position of power.

Sexual Harassment

Is most often one sided.

Unwanted sexual advances and/or touching.

Neither are tolerated in schools.

Quid Pro Quo Harassment Quid pro quo means “this for that”. A person offers you a favor in return for

something that makes you feel uncomfortable. This person may or may not be in a position

of power. They may also threaten to take

something away. No matter what they say, it would

never be your fault if you engage in this behavior.

Flirting vs. Sexual Harassment Flirting is:A complimentFlatteringOpenReciprocal

Sexual harassment is: InvadingDemeaning DegradingOne-sided

Flirting makes people feel:

FlatteredGoodHappyIn control Pretty or attractive

Sexual harassment makes people feel:Angry or sadBadDemeanedPowerlessUgly

What to Remember about FlirtingFlirting is always:

◦ Wanted◦ Two-sided◦ Legal

Sexual harassment is always:◦ Unwanted ◦ Power motivated◦ Illegal

How do you know your behavior is unwelcome?

Ask yourself: Would I behave this way if

anyone was watching? Have I been asked not to

repeat this behavior by anyone?

Has this person said “no” once? Would I want someone to

behave this way towards me? Would I like it if someone made

these comments about anyone else? The recipient always gets to decide

whether or not they welcome your behavior.

You get to decide what you are

comfortable with.You can change

your mind at any time.

Use the

method.

What can I do if I encounter sexual

harassment?

STOP

ource

The SOURCE of the behavior has the responsibility to stop it. Use the “eye of the beholder”

standard. The decision of whether or not the

behavior is wanted is ALWAYS made by the recipient.

S

arget

The TARGET, recipient, must remove him/her self of the situation

The target has a right to confront the source(s) of the harassment. Let others know that their words or

actions are offensive. The target must tell a person in

authority about the incident.

T

bserver

Those who OBSERVE the behavior also has a responsibility to help make it stop.

This is always reporting, never tattling.

O

erson in Authority

Alert a PERSON IN AUTHORITY of the situation. Never assume they know what is going

on. People in authority are required by

law to listen to you, believe you and to get you the help that you need. If that person doesn’t help you, tell

someone else.

P

Remember…

STOP

ourceargetbservererson in Authority

It would never

be your fault.

Summary Sexual harassment can be verbal, written or physical. Two key words are: unwelcome and repeated. The target and the source can be any gender and any

age. Neither sexual harassment nor sexual misconduct are

tolerated in schools. Flirting is okay at appropriate times and locations. Consider your actions before you take them. You get to decide what you are comfortable with. You can change your mind at any time. If you encounter sexual harassment, use the STOP

method. Remember, it would never be your fault.

References A Student’s Guide to Sexual Harassment. Wyoming Council for

Women’s Issues: 1994 Addressing Sexual Harassment with Teens." Building Health

Relationships Across Virginia. 157-85. Print. “Equal Right Advocates: Sexual Harassment at School." ERA:

Welcome. Web. 19 May 2011. <http://www.equalrights.org/publications/kyr/shschool.asp>.

Forgarty, Katy. "Teens and Sexual Harassment | Education.com.“ Teens and Sexual Harassment. University of Florida IFAS Extension. Web. 28 June 2011. <http://www.education.com/reference/article/Ref_Teens_Sexual/>.

Parker-pope, Tara. "Sexual Harassment at School - NYTimes.com." Health and Wellness - Well Blog - NYTimes.com. Web. 2 July 2011. <http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/05/01/sexual-harassment-at- school/>.

"Sexual Harassment." Sexual Harassment. Palo Alto Medical Foundation. Web. 19 May 2011. <http://myrin.ursinus.edu/help/resrch_guides/cit_style_mla.htm#

one>.