101 really important things you already know, but keep forgetting

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s Y o u

A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g

OTHER NOTABLE BOOKS BY ERNIE J. ZELINSKI

How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free: Retirement Wisdom ThatYou Won't Getfrom Your Financial Advisor

The Joy ofNot Working: A Book for the Retired, Unemployed,and Ovenuorked

Real Success Without a Real Job: The Career Book for PeopleToo Smart to Work in Corporations

1 0 1

R e a l l y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s

Y o u A l r e a d y K n o w ,

B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g

E r r l i e J . Z e l i r l s k i

V i s i o n s I n t e r n a t i o n a l P u b l i s h i n g

COPYRIGHT 2007 by Ernie J. Zelinski

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Reproduction in whole or in part, by any means, is notallowed without written permission.

Direct all inquiries to:Visions International PublishingP.O. Box 4072, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, T6E 4S8Phone: 780-434-9202, E-mail: [email protected]

Distributed to Canadian bookstores by Sandhill BookMarketing, Unit #4 - 3308 Appaloosa Road, Kelowna, B.C.,VIV 2G9, Phone 800-667-3848, www.sandhillbooks.com

FOREIGN EDITIONS:Published in Spanish by Amat Editorial, BarcelonaPublished in Russian by Gayatri Publishing, MoscowPublished in French by Stanke International, MontrealPublished in Chinese traditional characters by Yuan-Liou

Publishing, TaipeiPublished in Chinese simplified characters by CITIC

Publishing House, BeijingPublished in Korean by Mulpure Publishing, Seoul

Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication

Zelinski, Ernie J. (Ernie John), 1949-101 really important things you already know, but keepforgetting : how to make life more livable and enjoyable day-by-day, year-by-year / Ernie J. Zelinski.

ISBN 978-0-9694194-6-4

1. Conduct of life. 2. Self-realization. 1. Title. H. Title: Onehundred and one really important things you already know,but keep forgetting.

BF637.C5Z452007 158.1 C2007-903077-7

Printed and Bound in Canada by Friesens1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 - 12 11 10 09 08 07

D e d i c a t e d t o M y W o n d e r f u l M o t h e r

V i o l e t Z e l i n s k i

( W a s e l y n a G o r d y c h u k )

A u g u s t 5 , 1 9 2 1 - F e b r u a r y 8 , 2 0 0 7

W h o p a s s e d a w a y w h i l e I w a s c o m p l e t i n g t h i s b o o k - a n d m e a n t

s o m u c h t o h e r f r i e n d s , h e r r e l a t i v e s , a n d m e f o r s o m a n y y e a r s .

W e a l l l o v e y o u a n d m i s s y o u d e a r l y .

C o n t e n t s

P r e f a c e 1

1 . Y o u O o n ' t H a v e t o K n o w t h e M e a n i n g o f L i f e

t o E n j o y I t F u l l y 3

2 . L i f e I s T o u g h - B u t T h e n A g a i n , C o m p a r e d t o W h a t ? 5

3 . L i f e ' s a B r e e z e W h e n Y o u W o r k A s H a r d a t

S i m p l i f y i n g I t A s Y o u 0 0 a t C o m p l i c a t i n g I t 7

4 . H a p p i n e s s O o e s n ' t C a r e H o w Y o u G e t T h e r e 9

5 . S l o w D o w n i n Y o u r P u r s u i t o f H a p p i n e s s a n d I t ' s

M o r e L i k e l y t o C a t c h u p w i t h Y o u 1 1

6 . P r e d i c t Y o u r F a i l u r e s a n d Y o u W i l l B e c o m e a

H i g h l y S u c c e s s f u l P r o p h e t . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1 3

7 . T h e P a i n o f U n f u l f i l l e d O r e a m s C a n B e t h e W o r s t

A c h e Y o u W i l l E v e r E x p e r i e n c e 1 5

8 . I f Y o u W a n t t o B e a S t a r , I t ' s B e s t N o t t o B o t h e r

w i t h O t h e r T h i n g s 1 7

9 . 0 0 t h e O i f f i c u l t a n d U n c o m f o r t a b l e I f Y o u W o u l d

L i k e a n E a s y a n d C o m f o r t a b l e L i f e 2 0

1 0 . O r d i n a r y P e o p l e A t t a i n E x t r a o r d i n a r y S u c c e s s

- Y o u C a n T o o ! 2 3

1 1 . O v e r n i g h t S u c c e s s H a p p e n s O n l y i n F a i r y T a l e s ,

T r a s h y N o v e l s , a n d B a d M o v i e s 2 5

1 2 . T o K n o w a n d N o t t o 0 0 I s N o t Y e t t o K n o w 2 7

1 3 . A l w a y s E x p e c t t h e U n e x p e c t e d B e c a u s e t h e O n l y

C e r t a i n t y I s U n c e r t a i n t y 2 9

1 4 . T o o M u c h S a f e t y I s O a n g e r o u s f o r Y o u r W e l l - B e i n g 3 1

1 5 . Y o u C a n O b s e r v e a L o t J u s t b y W a t e h i n g 3 3

1 6 . O o n ' t M e s s A r o u n d w i t h R e a l i t y a n d R e a l i t y

W o n ' t M e s s A r o u n d w i t h Y o u 3 5

1 7 . I f Y o u O o n ' t W a n t t o A c c o m p l i s h S o m e t h i n g

I m p o r t a n t , A n y E x c u s e W i l l 0 0 3 7

1 8 . S e l f - P i t y C o s t s N o t h i n g a n d I t I s W o r t h

J u s t A s M u c h 3 9

1 9 . Y o u C a n B e a V i c t i m o r Y o u C a n B e S u c c e s s f u l

- Y o u C a n ' t B e B o t h , H o w e v e r . 4 1

2 0 . I f S o m e t h i n g I s B o r i n g Y o u , I t ' s P r o b a b l y Y o u . 4 3

2 1 . A l l W o r r y I s W a s t e d . 4 5

2 2 . P r o c r a s t i n a t i o n I s t h e A r t o f K e e p i n g U p

w i t h Y e s t e r d a y . 4 7

23. Don't Buy Expensive Sacks IfYou Can NeverFind Them 49

24. Book Smart Does Not Mean Life Smart 5125. Contrary to Popular Belief, Time Is Not Money 5326. Slow Down and the Rest of the World Will Slow

Down for You 5527. A Good Friend Is Much Cheaper than Therapy

- and Ten Times As Helpful! 5728. Ten Million Dollars Cannot Buy What Great

Friendship Can 5929. One True Friend Is Worth More than 10,000

Superficial Ones 6130. If You Can Be Happy Only with Others - and Not

Alone - You Are Not a Very Happy Person 6331. People Are Only Human - If They Weren't, Life

Would Be Different 6532. It's All Tao Easy to Overestimate Your Ability to

Change Others 6733. Giving Advice to Anyone Means That You Either

Lose or Break Even 6934. Don't Walk away from Negative People - Run! 7135. If You Hang Around with a Bunch of Blunderers

Lang Enough, You Will Become One Yourself 7336. There's Insanity on Both Sides of the Debate

When You Argue with an Idiot 7537. The Best Way to Impress People Is by Not Trying

to Impress Them 7738. Nice People Are Often Not Good People and Good

People Are Often Not Nice People 7939. Everyone in This World - Inc1uding You and

Me - Is Selfish 8140. When Someone Fails to Keep a Commitment, There

Is a 95 Percent Chance That It Will Happen Again 8341. Good Deeds Are Seldom Remembered; Bad Deeds

Are Seldom Forgotten 8542. The Surest Way to Failure Is Trying to

Please Everyone 8743. It's Always Easier to Stay Out of Trouble than to

Get Out of Trouble 89

4 4 . D o n ' t T a k e I t P e r s o n a l l y ; T h e y A r e D o i n g I t t o

E v e r y o n e E l s e . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 1

4 5 . T h e M o r e I m p o r t a n t I t I s , t h e L e s s C h a n c e T h a t

A n y b o d y I s G o i n g t o 0 0 I t f o r Y o u 9 3

4 6 . B e l i e f I s a D i s e a s e 9 5

4 7 . B e w a r e o f E x p e r t s - P a r t i c u l a r l y T h o s e w i t h t h e

M o s t K n o w l e d g e a n d E x p e r i e n c e 9 7

4 8 . B e i n g R e a s o n a b l e W i n s U s t h e B o o b y P r i z e o f L i f e 9 9

4 9 . W i s e P e o p l e L e a r n M o r e f r o m F o o l s t h a n

F o o l s L e a r n f r o m W i s e P e o p l e 1 0 1

5 0 . B e C a r e f u l w i t h Y o u r H e r o e s ; D o n ' t P u t

A n y o f T h e m o n a P e d e s t a l 1 0 3

5 1 . I t D o e s n ' t C o s t M u c h t o B e K i n d , B u t I t C a n B e

V e r y C o s t l y B e i n g T o o K i n d 1 0 5

5 2 . B e i n g R i g h t a t A l l C o s t s I s l i k e B e i n g a D e a d

H e r o - T h e r e I s N o P a y o f f 1 0 7

5 3 . T h e M o s t C r e a t i v e S h o r t c u t t o S u c c e s s I s t o

R e e v a l u a t e W h a t S u c c e s s M e a n s t o Y o u 1 0 9

5 4 . I n s t e a d o f C r i t i c i z i n g S o m e o n e ' s S u c c e s s , W h y

N o t L e a r n S o m e t h i n g V a l u a b l e f r o m I t ? 1 1 1

5 5 . Y o u r P a s t I s A l w a y s G o i n g t o B e t h e W a y I t

W a s - S o S t o p T r y i n g t o C h a n g e I t ! 1 1 3

5 6 . A l l Y o u C a n E x p e r i e n c e I s t h e N o w , S o W h y

A r e n ' t Y o u T h e r e ? 1 1 5

5 7 . I f Y o u r H o u s e I s o n F i r e , W a r m Y o u r s e l f b y I t 1 1 7

5 8 . L i v i n g W e l l I s t h e B e s t R e v e n g e 1 1 9

5 9 . Y o u D o n ' t H a v e t o W a t c h O n e M i n u t e o f T V t o .

B e H a p p y - a n d P e r h a p s Y o u S h o u l d n ' t 1 2 1

6 0 . Y o u A r e t h e B i g g e s t C a u s e o f P r o b l e m s i n Y o u r L i f e 1 2 3

6 1 . M a n y o f t h e T h i n g s Y o u W a n t W i l l G i v e Y o u

M o r e P r o b l e m s t h a n Y o u C a n E v e r I m a g i n e 1 2 5

6 2 . Y o u C a n C h a n g e t h e Q u a l i t y o f Y o u r L i f e

I n s t a n t a n e o u s l y 1 2 7

6 3 . T h e S e v e r i t y o f Y o u r P r o b l e m s I s a M a t t e r

o f P e r s p e c t i v e 1 2 9

6 4 . Y o u A r e n ' t G o i n g t o S o l v e t h e P r o b l e m I f Y o u

D o n ' t I d e n t i f y I t P r o p e r l y 1 3 1

6 5 . N o O n e C a n G i v e Y o u W i s e r A d v i c e t h a n Y o u C a n 1 3 3

6 6 . T a k e S p e c i a l C a r e o f Y o u r s e l f - B e c a u s e N o

O n e E l s e W i l l ! 1 3 5

67. A Walk or Run in Nature Is the Best Medicinefor Many of Your Ailments 137

68. The Shortcut to Being Truly Fit and Trim IsLong-Term Rigorous Action 139

69. Your Mind Needs a Good Run Too 14170. Life Isn't Fair and It Will Continue to Be That Way 14371. There Is No One Big Deal in Life That Will

Save Your Hide 14572. The World Doesn't Owe You or Me or Anyone

Else a Living . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14773. You Can't Always Get What You Want, But You

Can Get a Lot More than You Think You Can 14974. There Is More to Positive Thinking than Thinking

Positive Thoughts 15175. What Will Keep You from Getting What You Want

Is Not Knowing What You Truly Want 15376. You Aren't Going to Get Much of What You Want

Unless You Ask for It 15577. Getting Rid of Your Desire for Something Is As

Good As Possessing It 15778. Want What You Have and You Will Always Get

What You Want 15979. You Are Already a Millionaire - Your Creativity

Makes It So 16180. If Patience Is Just the Art of Concealing Your

Impatience, You Better Be Very Good at It 16381. Opportunity Knocks Often - How Often Are

You Horne? 16582. To Double Your Success Rate, Just Double

Your Failure Rate 16783. Compromising Your Integrity for Money, Power, or

Farne Will Come Back to Haunt You Big Time 16984. There Are Many Fascinating Worlds Without Money 17185. More Money Won't Bring You More Happiness

- It Works the Other Way Around! 17386. True Prosperity Is Living Easily and Happily

Whether You Have Lots of Money or Not 17587. Financial Insanity Has Its Own Big Following

- Including You and Me 177

8 8 . S p e n d M o r e M o n e y o n Y o u r P e r s o n a l D e v e l o p m e n t

t h a n o n Y o u r N e x t H a i r s t y l e 1 7 9

8 9 . T a H a v e a G o o d G r a s p o f M o n e y , T r y J o y f u l l y

P a r t i n g w i t h a F a i r P o r t i o n o f I t ! 1 8 1

9 0 . B e i n g a S u c c e s s a t W o r k I s I r r e l e v a n t I f Y o u

A r e a F a i l u r e a t H o r n e 1 8 3

9 1 . T h e W o r k E t h i c I s a T e r r i b l e M i s t a k e 1 8 5

9 2 . W o r k A s H a r d A s Y o u H a v e t o f o r a C o m f o r t a b l e

L i v i n g - a n d A s L i t t l e A s Y o u C a n G e t A w a y W i t h . . . . . 1 8 7

9 3 . I t ' s B e s t t o L e a v e P e r f e c t i o n f o r t h e M i s f i t s o f t h i s

W o r l d t o P u r s u e 1 8 9

9 4 . M o s t A c t i v i t i e s W o r t h D o i n g S h o u l d B e D o n e i n

t h e M o s t H a p h a z a r d l y F a s h i o n P o s s i b l e 1 9 1

9 5 . I f Y o u A r e W h a t Y o u A i n ' t , T h e n Y o u A i n ' t W h a t

Y o u T r u l y S h o u l d B e 1 9 3

9 6 . Y o u C a n ' t M a k e a B i g D i f f e r e n c e i n T h i s W o r l d

U n l e s s Y o u A r e D i f f e r e n t 1 9 5

9 7 . L o o k I n s i d e a n d Y o u W i l l F i n d M o r e O u t s i d e 1 9 7

9 8 . Y o u r E n v y I s t h e S a t i s f a c t i o n a n d H a p p i n e s s

T h a t Y o u T h i n k O t h e r s A r e E x p e r i e n c i n g 1 9 9

9 9 . I f t h e G r a s s o n t h e O t h e r S i d e o f t h e F e n c e I s

G r e e n e r , T r y W a t e r i n g Y o u r S i d e 2 0 1

1 0 0 . N o M a t t e r H o w S u c c e s s f u l Y o u B e c o m e , t h e S i z e o f

Y o u r F u n e r a l W i l l S t i l l D e p e n d u p o n t h e W e a t h e r 2 0 3

1 0 1 . B e H a p p y W h i l e Y o u A r e A l i v e B e c a u s e Y o u

A r e a L o n g T i m e D e a d 2 0 7

A D D I T I O N A L L I F E L E S S O N S

A - 1 . T h a n k Y o u r M o t h e r a L o t W h i l e S h e I s S t i l l A l i v e 2 1 3

A - 2 . F l o w e r s , C a r d s , a n d C a n d y A r e N o t t h e

E s s e n c e o f M o t h e r ' s D a y 2 1 9

A - 3 . F o r t u n e R e s i d e s o n t h e O t h e r S i d e o f F e a r 2 2 1

A - 4 . F o r g e t H o w O l d Y o u A r e - T h i s B e c o m e s

M o r e I m p o r t a n t t h e O l d e r Y o u G e t 2 2 3

A - 5 . F l a t O u t - G r e a t F r i e n d s R o c k ! 2 2 5

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s Y o u A i r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g

P R E F A C E

H a v e y o u e v e r n o t i c e d h o w h i s t o r y h a s a h a b i t o f r e p e a t i n g i t s e l f ? M a n y

s i t u a t i o n s i n w h i c h y o u f i n d y o u r s e l f t o d a y a r e l i k e l y s i m i l a r t o o n e s y o u h a v e

e x p e r i e n c e d s o m e t i m e i n t h e p a s t . T h e o t h e r p a r t i c i p a n t s , a s w e l l a s t h e s t a g e ,

m a y h a v e c h a n g e d a l o n g t h e w a y - t h e d e e p - I a i d p l o t a n d i n t r i g u i n g d r a m a

a r e a l l t o o f a m i l i a r , h o w e v e r . T h r o u g h e a c h o f t h e s c e n e s , y o u g e t t o l e a m

s e v e r a l i m p o r t a n t c o n c e p t s o f l i v i n g t h a t y o u h a v e a l r e a d y l e a m e d s e v e r a l

t i m e s - b u t k e e p f o r g e t t i n g .

Y o u m a y h a v e f i r s t e n c o u n t e r e d s o m e o f t h e s e l i f e p r i n c i p l e s w h e n y o u

w e r e i n g r a d e s c h o o l . N e v e r t h e l e s s , y o u h a v e h a d t o r e l e a m t h e m f r o m t i m e t o

t i m e , i n s o m e c a s e s t o o m a n y t i m e s t o c o u n t . K e e p i n m i n d t h a t i t i s a l l t o o e a s y

t o c a r r y t h e b a g g a g e o f y o u r y o u t h i n t o y o u r l a t e r y e a r s . Y o u d o n ' t w a n t t o b e

s i x t y o r s e v e n t y y e a r s o l d a n d s a y i n g , " A n y d a y n o w , I a m g o i n g t o g e t m y a c t

t o g e t h e r a n d s t o p m a k i n g t h i s s a m e c o s t l y m i s t a k e o v e r a n d o v e r a g a i n . "

T h i s i s t h e r e a s o n t h a t t h i s b o o k f o c u s e s o n m a n y o f t h o s e l i f e l e s s o n s t h a t

m o s t o f u s h a v e a l r e a d y l e a m e d - b u t f o r s o m e m y s t e r i o u s r e a s o n k e e p

c o n s i g n i n g t o o b l i v i o n . S o m e t i m e s i t ' s n o t a l l t h a t m y s t e r i o u s ; i t ' s j u s t a c a s e

o f o u r a c t i n g o u t o f e m o t i o n i n s t e a d o f c o n s u l t i n g o u r i n t e l l e c t . K n o w i n g w h i c h

s i t u a t i o n s t o a v o i d a n d w h i c h p r i n c i p l e s t o f o l l o w i s i m p o r t a n t f o r a f u l l ,

r e w a r d i n g , h a p p y , a n d e n l i g h t e n e d l i f e . I n d e e d , f a i l u r e t o a b i d e b y t h e s e l i f e

l e s s o n s c a n d r a s t i c a l l y a f f e c t o u r p e r s o n a l a n d v o c a t i o n a l s u c c e s s .

I n l a r g e m e a s u r e t h i s b o o k i s a u t o b i o g r a p h i c a l . E v e n w h i l e w r i t i n g i t , I

o c c a s i o n a l l y f o u n d m y s e l f p r o m p t l y v i o l a t i n g o n e o f t h e p r i n c i p l e s a b o u t

w h i c h 1 h a d j u s t w r i t t e n . I n o n e c a s e , i t w a s s o m e w h a t e m b a r r a s s i n g w h e n i t

c o s t m e s o m e m o n e y a n d m y p r i d e . 1 t h o u g h t o f t h e g r a f f i t i w r i t e r w h o c l a i m e d ,

" 1 l e a m f r o m m y m i s t a k e s - 1 c a n m a k e t h e s a m e m i s t a k e w i t h g r e a t e r e a s e

t h e s e c o n d t i m e a r o u n d . "

T o b e s u r e , e x p e r i e n c e i n c r e a s e s o u r k n o w l e d g e , b u t i t d o e s n ' t n e c e s s a r i l y

d e c r e a s e t h e n u m b e r o f o u r m i s t a k e s . B e s t - s e l l i n g a u t h o r R i c h a r d B a c h w r o t e ,

" L e a m i n g i s f i n d i n g o u t w h a t y o u a l r e a d y k n o w . D o i n g i s d e m o n s t r a t i n g t h a t

2 101 Really Important Things You Already Know, But Keep Forgetting

you know it." It follows that knowledge can be called wisdom when we startusing it and benefiting from it. Intelligent action, in other words, is required totransform valuable knowledge into wisdom.

You will notice that much of the content in this book is just plain commonsense. Oliver WendeIl Holmes Sr. once said, "We all need an education in theobvious." In the same vein, a Latin proverb states that common sense is not allthat common. What's more, philosophers tell us common sense in an unusualamount leads to wisdom.

I hope that this book will also give you an insight or two instead of justreminding you of what you already know. There may indeed be a few lifelessons that you previously haven't leamed. Martin Vanbee wamed us, "Leamfrom the mistakes of others - you can't live long enough to make them allyourself."

After reading this book you may finally get the message about some oflife's important principles so that you don't have to releam them the hard way.Perish the thought of never violating all the lessons in this book, however.There will always be moments of weakness in your life during which yourepeat some mistake you have made several times before.

Your goal should be to minimize the number ofimportant lessons you keepforgetting and the number of times you forget them. Try to read this book withan open heart and an open mind. Apply the principles that resonate with youand discard those that don't.

Whenever working on a new project, I always keep in mind the words ofThomas Carlyle: "The best efIect of any book is that it excites the reader toself-activity." My wish is that the life lessons in this book infect you with theinspiration, motivation, and commitment needed to attain your dream ofhaving a full, relaxed, satisfying, and happy life.

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s Y o u A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g

1

Y o u D o n ' t H a v e t o K n o w t h e M e a n i n g

o f L i f e t o E n j o y I t F u l l y

3

E v e r s i n c e h u m a n b e i n g s d e v e l o p e d t h e a b i l i t i e s t o r e a s o n a n d e x p l o r e , t h e y

h a v e s e a r c h e d f o r t h e b i g s e c r e t . P h i l o s o p h e r s , s c i e n t i s t s , a n d t h e o l o g i a n s a l i k e

h a v e b e e n s e a r c h i n g f o r t h e u n d i s p u t a b l e a n s w e r t o t h e q u e s t i o n : " W h a t i s t h e

m e a n i n g o f l i f e ? " T h i s p e r p l e x i n g q u e s t i o n h a s r e s u l t e d i n a w i d e r a n g e o f

c o n c 1 u s i o n s a n d a r g u m e n t s , i n c 1 u d i n g s c i e n t i f i c t h e o r i e s , a u t h o r i t a t i v e d o g m a ,

p h i l o s o p h i c a l c o n j e c t u r e , a n d s p i r i t u a l e x p l a n a t i o n s .

A s a m a t t e r o f c o u r s e " W h a t i s t h e m e a n i n g o f l i f e ? " i s t h e m o s t p r o f o u n d

q u e s t i o n m o s t i n d i v i d u a l s a s k t h e m s e l v e s a t s o m e p o i n t d u r i n g t h e i r l i v e s . T h e

q u e s t i o n i n i t s e l f i s o p e n t o v a r i o u s i n t e r p r e t a t i o n s : W h y a r e w e h e r e ? W h o a r e

w e ? W h e r e d i d w e c o m e f r o m ? W h a t i s t h e p u r p o s e o f l i f e ? W i l l w e e x p e r i e n c e

l i f e a f t e r d e a t h ?

T o g e t t h e u p p e r h a n d o n e v e r y o n e e l s e , y o u y o u r s e l f m a y b e d e t e r m i n e d

t o g e t t o t h e b o t t o m o f t h i s m y s t e r y c a l l e d l i f e - n o t e v e n s u r e h o w m u c h

l o n g e r y o u c a n h a n g o n i f y o u d o n ' t f i n d i t . P l a i n a n d s i m p l e , i t i s u n l i k e l y t h a t

y o u w i l l s u c c e e d . A l l t h i n g s c o n s i d e r e d , t h e r e l i k e l y w i l l n e v e r b e a n a n s w e r .

M a n y i n d i v i d u a l s w i t h g r e a t e r t a l e n t a n d k n o w l e d g e t h a n y o u a n d m e h a v e

c o m e u p e m p t y - h a n d e d . Y o u w i l l f i n d t h a t t h e d e e p e r y o u g o , t h e m o r e t h e

m y s t e r y w i l l d e e p e n .

Y o u m a y e v e n d e c i d e t o g o t r a v e l i n g a r o u n d t h e w o r l d i n s e a r c h o f t h e

m a g i c a l a n s w e r t o l i f e . T h e f u r t h e r t h e b e t t e r , y o u t h i n k - m a y b e e v e n

a s h r a m s i n C o l o r a d o o r t h e H i m a l a y a M o u n t a i n s i n s o u t h - c e n t r a l A s i a . O n c e

y o u g e t t h e r e , y o u w i l l m a k e a n i n t e r e s t i n g d i s c o v e r y : T h e o n l y a n s w e r s a n d

e n l i g h t e n m e n t y o u g e t t o e x p e r i e n c e i n a s h r a m s i n C o l o r a d o o r m o u n t a i n t o p s

i n I n d i a a r e t h e a n s w e r s a n d e n l i g h t e n m e n t w i t h w h i c h y o u a r r i v e d .

T h i s d o e s n ' t m e a n t h a t y o u s h o u l d n ' t l e a m m o r e a b o u t t h e w o r l d . I t ' s

r e w a r d i n g t o e x p l o r e a n d d i s c o v e r t h e f a s c i n a t i n g a s p e c t s o f l i f e . B y a l l m e a n s ,

k e e p l o o k i n g t o i m p r o v e y o u r u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f m a n y t h i n g s a r o u n d y o u . I t ' s

b e s t t o l e t s o m e o f t h e m o r e p r o f o u n d t h i n g s r e m a i n m y s t e r i o u s , h o w e v e r .

4 101 Really Importont Things You Already Know, But Keep Forgetting

Sometimes too much understanding of something beautiful - such as thescientific explanation for what causes the Northem Lights to be visible in thenight skies of northem D.S.A., Europe, Russia, and Canada - makes it lessbeautiful.

In the same vein, having the absolute understanding of life - if there everwill be one - would undoubtedly make life less enjoyable. Richard Bach inIllusions wrote, "Leam what the magician knows and it's not magie anymore."Not to mention that desperately contemplating the meaning of life can lead tostress, ulcers, high blood pressure, and a lack of success. At the extreme,people frantically searching for the meaning of life have been known tocommit suicide.

Even if you discover the absolute meaning of life, you may realize that itdoesn't really make any difference to the quality of your existence anyway.Your answer may be that ultimately life is pretty meaningless, that we are allinsignificant grains of dust in the grand cosmic scheme of things, that we areallleading random lives, that our existence doesn't affect anything or anyone.

George Carlin may have actually found a far better answer to the meaningof life. Now don't get too excited, because his answer isn 't as profound as youmay anticipate. Carlin once said that the ultimate meaning of life is "to find aplace to put all your stuff." This, indeed, is as good of an answer as any other.

In short, if you want to reduce the existential angst in your life, give upyour self-adopted role as chief investigator of what makes this universe rock.No amount of brooding about the meaning of life can take the place of goingout there and enjoying all it has to offer. The mistake most people make aboutpursuing the meaning of life is searching for the answer instead of living it. Thesearch in itself may give some people meaning but it seldom brings a smile totheir faces.

How right Rita Mae Brown was when she said, "I finally figured out theonly reason to be alive is to enjoy it." When you leam to enjoy aB that life hasto offer, there is no need to understand it. Viewed in this way, the meaning oflife is to live fully - to enjoy the ride, in other words.

1 0 1 R e a l l y I r n p o r t a n t T h i n g s Y o u A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g

2

L i f e I s T o u g h - B u t T h e n A g a i n ,

C o m p a r e d t o W h a t ?

5

U n f o r t u n a t e l y , w h e n y o u a r r i v e d o n t h i s p l a n e t , n o o n e g a v e y o u a n i n s t r u c t i o n

b o o k o n h o w t o d e a l w i t h l i f e . I n y o u r e a r l y t e e n s y o u w e r e e x p e c t i n g l i f e t o b e

o n e b i g p a r t y o n c e y o u g o t y o u r a c t t o g e t h e r a s a n a d u l t . W h a t a s u r p r i s e ! A

f e w y e a r s a f t e r r e a c h i n g a d u l t h o o d a n d h a v i n g t o d e a l w i t h t h e r e a l w o r l d , y o u

c a m e t o t h e r e a l i z a t i o n t h a t l i f e i s d i f f i c u l t . I n t h i s r e g a r d A m e r i c a n p h i l o s o p h e r

G e o r g e S a n t a y a n a s u r m i s e d , " L i f e i s n o t a s p e c t a c l e o r a f e a s t ; i t i s a

p r e d i c a m e n t . "

R e g a r d l e s s o f y o u r a g e , i f y o u e x p e c t l i v i n g t o b e e a s i e r d o w n t h e r o a d ,

f o r g e t i t . W h a t m a y c o m e a s a s u r p r i s e i s t h a t l i f e i s d i f f i c u l t f o r e v e r y o n e . Y o u r

l i f e w o n ' t b e f r e e o f d i f f i c u l t y n o m a t t e r h o w t a l e n t e d a n d h o w r i e h y o u

b e c o m e . T r u t h b e t o l d , e v e r y o n e e x p e r i e n c e s s t r e s s a n d p a i n t o a c e r t a i n

d e g r e e .

I l l n e s s , n a t u r a l d i s a s t e r s , a c c i d e n t s , d e a t h , a n d o t h e r n e g a t i v e e v e n t s a r e

i n e v i t a b l e . N o n e o f u s i s i m m u n e . T h e s u c c e s s f u l o f t h i s w o r l d t a k e f o r g r a n t e d

t h a t t h e w o r l d i s a h a r d p l a c e . e a r l J u n g , t h e w e l l - k n o w n S w i s s p s y c h i a t r i s t ,

f e I t t h a t u n p l e a s a n t e x p e r i e n c e s h e l p u s f i n d p e r s o n a l a n d s p i r i t u a l w h o l e n e s s .

" M a n n e e d s d i f f i c u l t i e s , " s a i d J u n g . " T h e y a r e n e c e s s a r y f o r h e a l t h . "

A s a m a t t e r o f c o u r s e t h e w o r l d t h r o w s c u r v e s a t a l l o f u s t h r o u g h o u t o u r

l i v e s . I n t h e e v e n t y o u e v e r f i n d t h a t e v e r y t h i n g i s c o m i n g y o u r w a y , y o u w i l l

p r o b a b l y b e o n a o n e - w a y s t r e e t g o i n g t h e w r o n g w a y . Y o u m a y g o t h r o u g h a

s t r e t c h i n y o u r e x i s t e n c e w h e n s o m a n y t h i n g s a r e g o i n g r i g h t t h a t y o u s t a r t

b e l i e v i n g t h a t n o t h i n g o f c o n s e q u e n c e c o u l d g o w r o n g . A s i s t o b e e x p e c t e d ,

w h e n y o u g e t o n a r o l l , y o u w i l l s t a r t t h i n k i n g t h a t y o u f i n a l l y u n d e r s t a n d h o w

l i f e w o r k s .

A l a s , j u s t w h e n y o u a r e c o n v i n c e d t h a t y o u a r e u n d e r d i v i n e g u i d a n c e ,

s o m e t h i n g w i l l h a p p e n t o b u r s t y o u r b u b b l e . D i s a s t e r w i l l s t r i k e w h e n y o u l e a s t

e x p e c t i t . M o s t o f t h e t i m e , h o w e v e r , t h i n g s a p p e a r a l o t w o r s e t h a n t h e y a r e .

N o t h i n g v e r y g o o d l a s t s a l o n g t i m e - n e i t h e r d o e s a n y t h i n g v e r y b a d . H o w


many times have disasters become blessings in disguise?Everything changes sooner or later. The good becomes bad and the bad

becomes good. Profits turn into losses and losses turn into profits. Approvalmay turn into disapproval and disapproval may turn into approval. Mistakesand setbacks add up to success. Then success leads to failure. This is life. It isnever too late to start again.

As tough as things get sometimes, there are several ways to make life morealluring - things as simple as looking at the bright side of things. "When life 'sproblems seem overwhelming," syndicated columnist Ann Landers told us,"look around and see what other people are coping with. You may consideryourself fortunate." It also helps to realize that nothing is as serious as it firstappears. Today's crisis makes tomorrow's interesting story.

American novelist Kathleen Norris has a formula for making yourexistence a lot less difficult: "Life is easier to take than you think; all that isnecessary is to accept the impossible, do without the indispensable, and bearthe intolerable." Indeed, the more you can hold up to the tests ofthe real world,the more you can achieve. The key is to put your mind at ease and rely on yourinner strength to handle the difficult times confidently and successfully.

All told, life is a learning process and the school of hard knocks is a greatteacher. Pleasure and comfort don 't build character - adversity does! Onceyou acquire your Master's in Adversity, you will be prepared for the worst ofsituations. As Clare Boothe Luce, an American playwright and public official,once emphasized, "There are no hopeless situations; there are only people whohave grown hopeless about them."

Life can be relatively difficult or it can be relatively easy. Our materialenvironment has nothing to do with how difficult it iso What maUers is how wereact to our environment. Paradoxically, surrendering to the fact that life isn'talways easy will make it a lot easier. Whenever you feel that life isoverwhelming you, just subject yourself to this mind-altering question: "Yes,life is tough - but then again, compared to what?"


3

L i f e ' s a B r e e z e W h e n Y o u W o r k A s H a r d a t

S i m p l i f y i n g I t A s Y o u D o a t C o m p l i c a t i n g I t

7

Y e s , l i f e i s t o u g h . B u t l i f e c a n b e a l o t e a s i e r w h e n w e k e e p t h i n g s s i m p l e .

S u r p r i s i n g l y , y o u w o u l d t h i n k t h a t h u m a n b e i n g s w o u l d w o r k a t s i m p l i f y i n g

t h e i r l i v e s , b u t t h e o p p o s i t e i s t r u e . G i v e n a c h o i c e b e t w e e n a s i m p l e w a y a n d

a c o m p l i c a t e d w a y o f d o i n g t h i n g s , m o s t p e o p l e w i l l c h o o s e t h e c o m p l i c a t e d .

P r e p o s t e r o u s a s i t m a y s e e m , s o m e o f u s w i l l e v e n s p e n d t i m e i n v e n t i n g a

c o m p l e x w a y w h e n n o n e i s i m r n e d i a t e l y a v a i l a b l e .

N o q u e s t i o n , w e d o n o t n e e d t o m a k e o U f l i v e s m o r e d i f f i c u l t . G i v e n t h e

o p p o r t u n i t y , p l e n t y o f o t h e r i n d i v i d u a l s i n t h i s w o r l d w i l l g l a d l y d o t h i s f o r u s o

L i f e ' s u n e x p e c t e d e v e n t s w i l l a l s o p u t o u r c r e a t i v i t y t o t h e u l t i m a t e t e s t w i t h o u t

o u r h a v i n g t o c r e a t e o U f o w n s p e c i a l d i f f i c u l t i e s .

T h e w o r d s y o u : a r e l e a s t l i k e l y t o h e a r f r o m a n y o n e i n A m e r i c a n s o c i e t y

t o d a y a r e " M y l i f e i s w a y t o o s i m p l e . " F a c t i s , m o s t i n d i v i d u a l s m a k e t h e i r

l i v e s w a y t o o c o m p l i c a t e d a n d w o n d e r w h y t h e y h a v e s o m a n y b i g h e a d a c h e s

a n d m a j o r p r o b l e m s .

W h y p e o p l e m a k e t h e i r l i v e s u n n e c e s s a r i l y c o m p l i c a t e d i s a m y s t e r y t o

p h i l o s o p h e r s a n d p s y c h i a t r i s t s a l i k e . I a m j u s t a s a m a z e d a t h o w f a r o u t o f t h e i r

w a y m o s t p e o p l e w i l l g o t o f i n d a m y r i a d o f m e t h o d s t o c o m p l i c a t e t h e i r

p e r s o n a l a n d b u s i n e s s l i v e s . T h e y w a s t e a l o t o f m o n e y , t i m e , a n d e n e r g y o n

p u r s u i n g t h i n g s t h a t b r i n g t h e m n o t h i n g i n r e t u r n . T h e y m a y a i s o h a n g a r o u n d

p e o p l e w h o w i l l d o t h e m a b s o l u t e l y n o g o o d .

A l l o f u s , t o s o m e e x t e n t o r a n o t h e r , p r a c t i c e t h e p h i l o s o p h y o f m y g o o d

f r i e n d T o d d L o r e n t z , w h o s t a t e d , " l u s t l i v i n g i n t h i s w o r l d i s a p s y c h o t i c

p U f s u i t . " A t s o m e p o i n t i n o U f l i v e s w e a l l h a v e t h e t e n d e n c y t o m a k e o U f l i v e s

u n b e l i e v a b l y c o m p l e x a n d d e p r e s s i n g . W e m a n a g e t o d o t h i s w i t h o U f m a t e r i a l

p o s s e s s i o n s , w o r k - r e l a t e d a c t i v i t i e s , r e l a t i o n s h i p s , f a m i l y a f f a i r s , t h o u g h t s , a n d

e m o t i o n s . A s i s t o b e e x p e c t e d , w e a r e u n a b l e t o a c h i e v e a s m u c h a s w e w o u l d

l i k e b e c a u s e w e i n v i t e t o o m a n y p h y s i c a l a n d m e n t a l d i s t r a c t i o n s i n t o O U f l i v e s .

Y e t l i f e ' s a b r e e z e w h e n w e w o r k a s h a r d a t s i m p l i f y i n g i t a s w e d o a t

8 101 Really Important Things You Already Know. But Keep Forgetting

complicating it. If you are the type of person who can't leave horne withoutfour-fifths of your personal possessions, it's time to lighten up a litde on yourjoumey through life. Without delay, get rid of the burdens that have become adrain on your time, space, money, and energy. Do something today to makeyour life less complicated.

To enjoy life to the fullest, you must periodically identify the things thatcomplicate your existence. This applies to both the personal and career aspectsofyour life. Make a list ofthe things that no longer serve a worthwhile purposein your world. Ask your friends to add to this with suggestions as to how youcan simplify things. Your friends may see much opportunity where you maysee none.

Sure, you didn't invent complexity. You do your absolute best to perfeet itat times, however, don't you? Keep in mind that making the simple complexdoesn't take ingenuity. Making the complex simple - now, that's ingenuity!

Apply common sense and you won't have much difficuity in simplifyingyour existence. This is about getting the excess b.aggage out of your life. "Noman can swim ashore," observed the Roman philosopher and dramatist Seneca,"and take his baggage with hirn." To be sure, life is much easier if you don'tcarry excess baggage.

Whatever your destination, you can 't afford to carry excess baggage fortoo long. On trains and airlines, it will cost you extra money. On the trip calledlife, it will cost you much more than money. At best, you won't succeed inachieving your goals as quickly as you otherwise would. At worst, you willnever succeed in attaining your goals. Not only will this deprive you ofsatisfaction and happiness, but it could cost you your sanity in the end.

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p o r t o l ' l t T h i n g s Y o u A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p f o r g e t t i n g

4

H a p p i n e s s D o e s n ' t C a r e H o w

Y o u G e t T h e r e

9

I n h i s w o r k N i c o m a c h e a n E t h i c s w r i t t e n i n 3 5 0 R C . , G r e e k p h i l o s o p h e r

A r i s t o t l e c l a i m e d t h a t h a p p i n e s s i s t h e o n l y t h i n g t h a t h u m a n s d e s i r e f o r i t s

o w n s a k e . P e o p l e s e e k r i c h e s , n o t f o r t h e s a k e o f b e i n g r i c h , b u t t o b e h a p p y .

L i k e w i s e , i n d i v i d u a l s d e s i r e f a r n e , n o t f o r t h e s a k e o f b e i n g f a m o u s , b u t

b e c a u s e t h e y b e l i e v e f a r n e w i l l b r i n g t h e m h a p p i n e s s . A c c o r d i n g t o A r i s t o t l e ,

t h e h i g h e s t g o o d f o r u s i s h a p p i n e s s , a n d t h a t i s w h y w e d e s i r e a n d s e e k i t .

A s a n e x p e r i e n c e a n d a s u b j e c t , h a p p i n e s s h a s b e e n p u r s u e d a n d

c o m m e n t e d o n e x t e n s i v e l y s i n c e t h e d a w n o f h i s t o r y . T h i s r e f l e c t s t h e u n i v e r s a l

import~~~ans h a v e p l a c e d , a n d s t i l l p l a c e , o n h a p p i n e s s . O f c o u r s e ,

s p i r i t u a l l e a d e r s , p h i l o s o p h e r s , p s y c h o l o g i s t s , a n d e c o n o m i s t s h a v e d i f f e r e n t

n o t i o n s o n t h e n a t u r e o f h a p p i n e s s a n d h o w t o a t t a i n i t .

O n e t h i n g i s c e r t a i n : I f y o u a r e t o b e h a p p y a n d a w a k e n t o t h e b e a u t y o f

t h e w o r l d a r o u n d y o u , y o u m u s t p u t y o u r l i f e i n s y n c h w i t h y o u r d e e p e s t v a l u e s

a n d b e l i e f s . Y o u m u s t p u r s u e w h a t y o u t r u l y w a n t o u t o f l i f e a n d n o t w h a t

o t h e r s w a n t y o u t o p u r s u e . T h i s i s n o t a n e a s y t h i n g t o d o , p a r t i c u l a r l y i n

m o d e r n W e s t e r n s o c i e t y , w h e r e w e a r e s u b j e c t t o s o m a n y o u t s i d e i n f l u e n c e s .

F o r i n s t a n c e , i t i s a l l t o o e a s y t o g e t t o o i n t o x i c a t e d w i t h t h e d r e a m o f w h a t

c o n v e n t i o n a l s u c c e s s i s g o i n g t o d o f o r y o u r h a p p i n e s s . Y e t c o n v e n t i o n a l

s u c c e s s a n d h a p p i n e s s a r e t w o e n t i r e l y d i f f e r e n t t h i n g s . C o n v e n t i o n a l s u c c e s s

- a b i g h o u s e , a b e a c h c a b i n , t w o o r t h r e e f a n c y c a r s , a n e x t r e m e l y a t t r a c t i v e

s p o u s e , a n d a h i g h - p o w e r e d j o b - h a r d l y s e r v e s a n y o t h e r p u r p o s e t h a n t o

m a k e l i f e e x t r e m e l y d i f f i c u l t f o r m o s t p e o p l e .

E r i c h F r o m m i n h i s b o o k E s c a p e f r o m F r e e d o m w r o t e , " M o d e r n m a n l i v e s

u n d e r t h e i l l u s i o n t h a t h e k n o w s w h a t h e w a n t s , w h i l e h e a c t u a l l y w a n t s w h a t

h e i s s u p p o s e d t o w a n t . " I n d e e d , i n t o d a y ' s c o n s u m e r s o c i e t y a d v e r t i s e r s a n d

t h e m e d i a d i c t a t e w h a t p e o p l e a r e s u p p o s e d t o w a n t . M a n y p e o p l e c o n s u m e t h i s

p r o g r a m m i n g g r e e d i l y i n s t e a d o f s t o p p i n g t o q u e s t i o n w h a t w i l l t r u l y m a k e

t h e m h a p p y . A f t e r a l l , i t i s m u c h e a s i e r t o t r y t o f i t i n w i t h t h e m a j o r i t y t h a n t o

10 101 Really Importont Things You Already Know, But Keep forgetting

question what the majority is doing.Yet following the majority as they look for happiness in all the wrong

places is insane. Understand that happiness doesn't care how you get there. Itdoesn't care how hard you work. Nor does it care whether you wear designerclothes or how fancy your car is or how many possessions you have. Moreover,happiness doesn 't care how beautiful, talented, or intelligent you are.

Perhaps by now you are thinking that these are just crazy assumptions. Onthe contrary, there is much scholarly evidence to support these statements.Research by psychologists indicates that the things that most people assurnewould make life better - money, farne, status, beauty, or social prominence -over the long run don't seem to matter all that much, if at all.

For example, one research paper reported that physical attractiveness hasafmost a very marginal effect on how content people are in life. Another studyconcluded individuals may be pleased for a month or two after a big lotterywin, but there is no relationship between the money and ultimate happiness ayear later. Still other research has shown that social standing, age, intelligence,and education have no effect on true happiness. ,

How happy you are depends on whether you~wilhng to be happy.Happiness will elude you as long as you are thinking and doing \yhat's wrongfor you. And it will come easily when you are thinking and doing what's rightfor you. Above all, ensure that you don't get conned into belieying happinessis what someone else deerns it to be.

You can rest assured that you will never attain true happiness if you waitfor destiny or others to show you the way. Whether you are black or white,male or female, illiterate or highly educated, single or married. raH or short, orrich or poor, happiness leaves you in charge of whether you ger there. TheDalai Lama told us, "Happiness is not something ready-made thar Buddha cangive you. It comes from your own actions." Take his ad\ice and ron with it. Itwill be extremely valuable to you on your joumey through In""e.

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s Y o u A l r e a d y K n o w , B u f K e e p F o r g e t t i n g 1 1

5

S l o w D o w n i n Y o u r P u r s u i t o f H a p p i n e s s a n d

I t ' s M o r e L i k e l y t o C a t c h U p w i t h Y o u

I n m o d e m l i f e , a s i n G r e e k t r a g e d i e s , s h o u l d w e b e a s t o n i s h e d t h a t m a n y

s u c c e s s f u l p e o p l e a r e n ' t h a p p y p e o p l e ? I n c a s e y o u h a v e n ' t n o t i c e d ,

c o n v e n t i o n a l s u c c e s s i s m u c h e a s i e r t o a t t a i n t h a n h a p p i n e s s . T h e r e a r e

h u n d r e d s o f t h o u s a n d s o f n e u r o t i c s w h o a r e s u c c e s s f u l - b u t t h e r e a r e n o

h a p p y o n e s !

S o h o w d o y o u c r e a t e h a p p i n e s s i f y o u a r e s u c c e s s f u l a n d n o t h a p p y ? F i r s t ,

d o n ' t d e s p e r a t e l y p u r s u e h a p p i n e s s . H a p p i n e s s , i t s e e m s , d o e s n ' t l i k e p e o p l e

w h o a r e d e s p e r a t e f o r i t . S l o w d o w n i n y o u r p u r s u i t o f h a p p i n e s s a n d i t ' s m o r e

l i k e l y t o c a t c h u p w i t h y o u . T h e m o r e y o u s e a r c h f o r h a p p i n e s s , t h r o u g h

s u c c e s s o r o t h e r w i s e , t h e m o r e i t w i l l s e e m t o e l u d e y o u . Y o u c a n ' t a c h i e v e

h a p p i n e s s b y b u y i n g i t o r c o n t i n u a l l y s t r i v i n g t o a c h i e v e i t .

P a r a d o x i c a l l y , i f y o u r p r i m a r y g o a l i n l i f e i s t o b~appy, h a p p i n e s s w i l l

a l w a y s b e b e y o n d y o u r g r a s p . " T h e s e a r c h f o r j i a p p i n e s s , " E r i c H o f f e r

d e c l a r e d , " i s o n e o f t h e c h i e f s o u r c e s o f u n h a p p i m r s , " V i c t o r F r a n k e l e c h o e d

t h o s e r e m a r k s w h e n h e w r o t e , " I t i s t h e v e r y p u r s u \ t o f h a p p i n e s s t h a t ' t h w a r t s

h a p p i n e s s . " A n d E d i t h W h a r t o n a g r e e d b y s t a t i n g , " I f o n l y w e ' d s t o p t r y i n g t o

b e h a p p y w e ' d h a v e a p r e t t y g o o d t i m e . "

I n s t e a d o f p u r s u i n g h a p p i n e s s , s t a r t l i v i n g l i f e a c c o r d i n g t o t h e w a y t h i n g s

a r e i n s t e a d o f t h e w a y t h e y s h o u l d b e . M u c h u n h a p p i n e s s i s c a u s e d b y t h e

b e l i e f t h a t l i f e s h o u l d b e d i f f e r e n t f r o m w h a t i t a c t u a l l y i s o A c c e p t i n g r e a l i t y f o r

w h a t i t i s w i l l l i b e r a t e y o u f r o m t h e i m p r i s o n m e n t o f w h a t o u g h t t o b e .

D o n ' t b e d i s m a y e d w h e n t h e w o r l d h a s n ' t b r o u g h t y o u w h a t y o u w a n t . F o r

m a n y o f t h e t h i n g s t h a t y o u h a v e b e e n d e n i e d t h e u n i v e r s e h a s b r o u g h t y o u

s o m e t h i n g b e t t e r . I t i s y o u r d u t y t o d i s c o v e r w h a t i t i s o S u r p r i s i n g l y , a h a p p y

l i f e i s n ' t t h e a b s e n c e o f u n h a p p i n e s s . U n h a p p i n e s s w i l l s n e a k i n t o y o u r l i f e

w h e t h e r y o u w a n t i t o r n o t . S o w i l l h a p p i n e s s . W h a t y o u c h o o s e t o d o w i t h

e i t h e r i s u p t o y o u .

W h e n h a p p i n e s s f o r g e t s a b o u t y o u , s e e w h a t t r e a s u r e s y o u c a n f i n d i n y o u r


unhappiness. It won't be long before happiness remembers who you are, andsneaks back into your life again. Keep in mind that ten times as many goodthings happen to you as bad things. This is a good reason to spend ten times asmuch time ranting and raving about the wonder of life as you do complainingabout it.

In your search for Shangri-Ia, don't overlook the possibility that paradisemay be where you are right now. Everyone seems to want to be somewherethey aren't. Choose to be where you are right now and you will be happier than90 percent of humankind.

lust as important, why waste so much time, energy, and money trying tobuy the biggest house that your credit rating will allow? Truth be told, a smallhouse can hold as much happiness as a large one. Sometimes, in fact, it willhold even more!

If you want to be happier, try going with the flow of life a little more. Letthings happen naturally instead of always trying to make things happen. It'salways easier to ride a horse in the direction it's going. In other words, be thesource of happiness instead of looking for it. You don't have to pursuehappiness if that is where you are coming from.

All told, happiness is a mode of traveling and not the destination.Happiness is a product of achieving goals, but not a goal in itself. Zen masterstell us that we corrupt the beauty of living by making happiness the goal. Theysay happiness is the practice ofliving in the moment; it's in everything we do.Leam how to live and to be happy one day at a time - and you will havemastered how to live happily ever after.

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p a r t a n t T h i n g s ' t a u A l r e a d y K n o w , a u t K e e p F a r g e t t i n g 1 3

6

P r e d i c t Y o u r F a i l u r e s a n d Y o u W i l l B e c o m e

a H i g h l y S u c c e s s f u l P r o p h e t

M o s t i n d i v i d u a l s e x p e c t t h a t t h e y c a n ' t a c c o m p l i s h a n y t h i n g o f v a l u e i n t h e i r

l i v e s - a n d t h e y a r e s e l d o m d i s a p p o i n t e d , T h e s a d t h i n g i s t h e y c o u l d m a k e a

b i g d i f f e r e n c e i n t h i s w o r l d i f t h e y d i d n ' t a n t i c i p a t e f a i l u r e . " T h e r e i s n ' t a

p e r s o n a n y w h e r e , " a s s e r t e d H e n r y F o r d , " w h o i s n ' t c a p a b l e o f d o i n g m o r e t h a n

h e t h i n k s h e c a n . "

E v e n t h e m o s t g i f t e d i n d i v i d u a l s - w h e t h e r p l u m b e r s , p o e t s , o r

p e d i a t r i c i a n s - w i l l n o t a c c o m p l i s h m u c h i n t h i s w o r l d , h o w e v e r , u n l e s s t h e y

f r e e t h e m s e l v e s f r o m t h e i r s e l f - i m p o s e d l i m i t a t i o n s . C o n f i d e n c e i s e v e r y t h i n g

w h e n i t c o m e s t o a c h i e v i n g s u c c e s s . L a c k o f f a i t h i n t h e i r o w n a b i l i t i e s i s t h e

m a i n r e a s o n t h a t m o s t p e o p l e d o n ' t c o m e c l o s e t o a c h i e v i n g t h e i r f u l l p o t e n t i a l .

S e l f - d o u b t i s m u c h m o r e p r e v a l e n t t h a n y o u m a y t h i n k . E v e r y o n e i n t h i s w o r l d ,

i n f a c t , h a r b o r s s e l f - d o u b t t o s o m e d e g r e e .

L i k e v i r t u a l l y e v e r y o n e e l s e i n t h i s w o r l d , y o u c a n a c c o m p l i s h m o r e t h a n

y o u t h i n k y o u c a n . M o s t o f y o u r l i m i t a t i o n s a r e i n y o u r m i n d . T h e d a n g e r i s

t h a t y o u r f a l s e s e l f - d o u b t s c a n b e c o m e r e a l . N e g a t i v e e x p e c t a t i o n s b r i n g a b o u t

n e g a t i v e r e s u l t s . W h e n y o u k e e p s a y i n g t h a t t h i n g s w o n ' t w o r k o u t f o r y o u , y o u

w i l l g e t t o b e r i g h t a b o u t i t . T o l o o k a t t h i s a n o t h e r w a y , p r e d i c t y o u r f a i l u r e s

a n d y o u w i l l b e c o m e a h i g h l y s u c c e s s f u l p r o p h e t w i t h a n i m p r e s s i v e t r a c k

r e c o r d .

I t i s i m p o r t a n t t h a t y o u i g n o r e a n y s e l f - t a l k a b o u t w h y y o u c a n ' t

a c c o m p l i s h s o m e t h i n g s i g n i f i c a n t . J u s t a s i m p o r t a n t , y o u m u s t i g n o r e o t h e r

p e o p l e w h o a r e j u s t t o o w i l l i n g t o t a l k y o u o u t o f t r y i n g s o m e t h i n g c h a l l e n g i n g .

W h e n y o u h a v e f a i t h i n y o u r a b i l i t i e s , i t m a t t e r s l i t t l e w h e n o t h e r s s a y t h a t y o u r

b i g g e s t g o a l s c a n n o t b e a c h i e v e d . I n f a c t , i f y o u h a v e a w i n n i n g a t t i t u d e , y o u

w i l l b e m o t i v a t e d e v e n m o r e t o a c c o m p l i s h y o u r g o a l s w h e n s o m e o n e d e c l a r e s

t h a t t h e s e g o a l s a r e u n a t t a i n a b l e . Y o u w i l l a l s o d i s c o v e r t h e i n c r e d i b l e

s a t i s f a c t i o n t h a t c o m e s f r o m d o i n g w h a t o t h e r s s a y y o u a r e n ' t c a p a b l e o f d o i n g .

W e a l l w a n t t o l e a v e a m a r k o n t h i s w o r l d . W e w a n t t o k n o w t h a t o u r l i f e


matters, that we make a difference somehow. So don't let your past failureshold you back. It's easy to let failure go to your head. Ifyou have recently beenexperiencing obscurity, low self-esteem, unhappiness, or frustration, you havelikely been doing something wrang.

Don't buy into the sentimental notion that success is an absurd, erraticthing attainable only by a few ofthe extremely talented. You have to break outof the rut and find some mountain to climb. "Argue for your limitations,"wamed Richard Bach, "and sure enough they are yours." You shouldn't settlefor less than you are capable of attaining. Why settle for average when yourtalents - combined with motivation and effort - can put you far aboveaverage?

'Whether it's making new friends or having a more fulfilling career, adream not acted upon will remain just a dream. The strongest single factor inattaining any one of your dreams is self-esteem - believing you have talentand creativity, believing you deserve your dream, and believing that it ispossible for you to attain the dream.

All things considered, the greatest failure is the person who doesn't try.When you spot an opportunity, you must be willing to do your best to capitalizeon it. Give yourself permission to try and give yourself permission to fai!.Failure will bring out your ignorance. Celebrate both your failure and yourignorance, because ifyou do, you will become wiser. And don't forget to giveyourself permission to succeed. With success, you will become even wiser.

Roman poet Virgil concluded, "They can because they think they can."You must convince yourself that your limits are smaller and fewer than theimaginary ones you have been subjecting yourselfto. lust getting by when youcan do much better is no way to spend the rest ofyour life. There comes a timewhen you must get your act together and show the world and yourselfwhat youcan do.

1 0 1 R e a l i y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s V O l l A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g 1 5

7

T h e P a i n o f U n f u l f i l l e d D r e a m s C a n B e t h e

W o r s t A c h e Y o u W i l l E v e r E x p e r i e n c e

M a n y - p e r h a p s m o s t - p e o p l e o n t h e i r d e a t h b e d s r e f l e c t u p o n t h e i r l i v e s

w i t h d e e p r e g r e t s . A s h l e y M o n t a g u a r t i c u l a t e d t h i s s o w e I l : " T h e d e e p e s t

p e r s o n a l d e f e a t s u f f e r e d b y h u m a n b e i n g s i s c o n s t i t u t e d b y t h e d i f f e r e n c e

b e t w e e n w h a t o n e w a s c a p a b l e o f b e c o m i n g a n d w h a t o n e h a s i n f a c t b e c o m e . "

I f y o u a r e g e t t i n g n o s a t i s f a c t i o n i n y o u r l i f e , y o u u n d o u b t e d l y k n o w t h a t t h e

a c h e o f u n f u l f i l l e d d r e a m s c a n b e t h e w o r s t p a i n y o u w i l l e v e r e x p e r i e n c e .

I f y o u e x p e r i m e n t w i t h a r a t b y c o n s i s t e n t l y p l a c i n g c h e e s e i n t h e t h i r d o f

s e v e r a l t u n n e l s , t h e r a t w i l l e v e n t u a l l y f i g u r e o u t t h e c h e e s e i s a l w a y s i n t h e

t h i r d t u n n e l . T h e r a t w i l l g o d i r e c t l y t o t h e t h i r d t u n n e l w i t h o u t l o o k i n g i n o t h e r

t u n n e l s . S t a r t p u t t i n g t h e c h e e s e i n t h e s i x t h t u n n e l a n d t h e r a t w i l l k e e p o n

g o i n g t o t h e t h i r d t u n n e l . S o o n e r o r l a t e r , h o w e v e r , t h e r a t w i l l r e a l i z e t h e r e i s

n o c h e e s e i n t h e t h i r d t u n n e l ; t h e r a t w i l l n o w s t a r t l o o k i n g i n t h e o t h e r t u n n e l s

u n t i l i t d i s c o v e r s t h e c h e e s e i s i n t h e s i x t h t u n n e l . A s a m a t t e r o f c o u r s e t h e r a t

w i l l n o w c o n s i s t e n t l y s h o w u p i n t h e t u n n e l w i t h t h e c h e e s e .

T h e d i f f e r e n c e b e t w e e n r a t s a n d h u m a n b e i n g s i s t h a t t h e m a j o r i t y o f

h u m a n b e i n g s w i l l r e m a i n i n a t u n n e l w h e n t h e r e i s n o c h e e s e i n i t . W e i r d -

n o d o u b t - b u t t r u e . M o s t h u m a n s g e t t h e m s e l v e s i n t o t r a p s f r o m w h i c h t h e y

n e v e r e s c a p e . C l e a r l y , i t ' s p r e t t y h a r d t o g e t t h e c h e e s e w h e n o n e i s c a u g h t i n a

t r a p t h a t h a s n o c h e e s e l e f t - o r h a d n o c h e e s e i n i t i n t h e f i r s t p l a c e . N e e d l e s s

t o s a y , " c h e e s e " h e r e i s a m e t a p h o r f o r h a p p i n e s s , s a t i s f a c t i o n , a n d c r e a t i v e

f u l f i l l m e n t t h a t c o m e f r o m p u r s u i n g a n d a t t a i n i n g o n e ' s d r e a m s .

S o m e w h a t t r a g i c i s t h e l a r g e n u m b e r - a t l e a s t t e n s o f m i l l i o n s - o f

s t u p e n d o u s l y i n t e l l i g e n t , w e l l - e d u c a t e d , h i g h l y t r a i n e d , a n d e x t r a o r d i n a r i l y

s k i l l e d p e o p l e i n N o r t h A m e r i c a w h o h a v e y e t t o e x p e r i e n c e a n y m e a s u r a b l e

s u c c e s s i n t h e i r l i v e s . T h e s e u n h a p p y a n d d i s h e a r t e n e d p e o p l e d i d n ' t f o l l o w

t h r o u g h o n t h e i r p l a n s o r p u r s u e t h e i r d r e a m s . I n s t e a d , t h e y c h o s e t h e b e s t -

p a y i n g j o b a v a i l a b l e a n d h a v e r e m a i n e d i n c a r e e r s t h e y d o n ' t e n j o y . T h e

p r o b l e m i s t h a t a f t e r f o r t y o r f i f t y y e a r s o f b o r e d o m , t h e y a r e s t i l l i n t h e s a m e

16 101 Really Important Things You Already Know, But Keep forgetting

tunnel, without any cheese, wondering when the plots in their life stories willtake a turn for the better.

On the other hand, there are individuals who are living their dreams.Dreams often do come true far many people, but only far those who focus andwork on them. To be totally playing the game of life, you must have dreams~~

1 0 1 R e a H y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s Y o u A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p f o r g e t t i n g 1 7

8

I f Y o u W a n t t o B e a S t a r , I t ' s B e s t N o t

t o B o t h e r w i t h O t h e r T h i n g s

G i v e n t h e c h o i c e b e t w e e n p u r s u i n g a d r e a m c a r e e r a n d c o n t i n u i n g a l i f e o f

g r i n d s t o n e e x i s t e n c e , m o s t p e o p l e o p t f o r t h e g r i n d s t o n e e x i s t e n c e . T h e y

t o l e r a t e a b u s i v e b o s s e s , l o u s y w o r k i n g c o n d i t i o n s , a n d b o r i n g , d e a d - e n d j o b s

s i m p l y b e c a u s e f i n d i n g a b e t t e r j o b t a k e s t i m e a n d e n e r g y . M o r e o v e r , p u r s u i n g

a c a r e e r d r e a m r e q u i r e s c h a n g e a n d r i s k - t a k i n g . M o s t p e o p l e f i n d i t e a s i e r t o

s t a y w i t h t h e f a m i l i a r , e v e n i f t h e f a m i l i a r o f f e r s e x t r e m e b o r e d o m a n d

d r u d g e r y .

I f y o u a r e n ' t p u r s u i n g y o u r c a r e e r d r e a m s t o d a y , y o u a r e s e t t i n g y o u r s e l f

u p f o r m u c h d i s a p p o i n t m e n t a n d m a n y r e g r e t s l a t e r i n l i f e . N o t h a v i n g f o l l o w e d

t h e i r c a r e e r d r e a m s i s u s u a l l y o n e o f t h e b i g g e s t r e g r e t s p e o p l e h a v e l a t e r i n

l i f e . I t m a y s u r p r i s e y o u , o r e v e n p a i n y o u , t o f i n d o u t t h a t m a n y p e o p l e , a f t e r

h a v i n g a t t a i n e d f a r n e a n d f o r t u n e , r e g r e t h a v i n g d e v o t e d a l l t h e i r l i f e e n e r g y t o

g e t t i n g t h e r e .

T a k e , f o r e x a m p l e , G e o r g e S o r o s , t h e f a m o u s c u r r e n c y s p e c u l a t o r . U s i n g

h i s f i n a n c i a l s a v v y , S o r o s a m a s s e d a f o r t u n e t h a t h a s b e e n e s t i m a t e d b y F o r b e s

t o b e o v e r $ 8 . 5 b i l l i o n . Y e t h e c l a i m s h e w o u l d t r a d e i t a l l f o r a c h a n c e t o h a v e

a c h i e v e d h i s d r e a m c a r e e r . B e i n g a p h i l o s o p h e r - n o t m a k i n g m o n e y - h a s

a l w a y s b e e n h i s r e a l p a s s i o n .

T h e f a s c i n a t i n g a s p e c t o f t h i s i s t h a t t h e e x p e r i e n c e o f G e o r g e S o r o s i s n o t

u n c o m m o n . C o u n t l e s s p e o p l e h a v e w o r k e d h a r d , a c c u m u l a t e d a s u b s t a n t i a l

a m o u n t o f m o n e y , a n d c o n c l u d e d t h a t i t w a s n ' t w o r t h i t . T h e y r e a l i z e d t h a t w i t h

l e s s m o n e y , t h e y w o u l d o n l y h a v e g i v e n u p t h i n g s t h e y d i d n ' t w a n t o r n e e d

a n y w a y . W h a t ' s m o r e , t h e y r e a l i z e d t h a t t h e y w o u l d h a v e e n j o y e d t h e m s e l v e s

m o r e a l o n g t h e w a y h a d t h e y w o r k e d a t s o m e t h i n g t h e y e n j o y .

Y o u p r o b a b l y h a v e d r e a m s t h a t y o u w a n t t o p u r s u e a n d s k i l l s a n d t a l e n t s

t h a t y o u w o u l d l i k e t o u t i l i z e s o m e w h e r e i n y o u r w o r k . Y o u m a y h a v e

s u p p r e s s e d t h e s e s k i l l s a n d t a l e n t s f o r y e a r s a n d y e a r s b e c a u s e y o u h a v e

b e c o m e t o o o b s e s s e d w i t h b e i n g s u c c e s s f u l i n t h e t r a d i t i o n a l s e n s e o f t h e w o r d .


This means making as much money as possible, in the shortest period of time.Perhaps you realize that you can have a more meaningful, more fulfilling,

andhappier existence only if you make important changes in your life. Allalong~~,_~Ou have put off making a change because you are waiting forthe perfect moment, with the right conditions. Clearly, there is no perfectmoment. Waiting fr things to get betler will ensure that they don't get better.

To wish your life away in anticipation of living some long-awaited dreamsometime in the distant future is to do yourself a great disservice. That futuremay never come - and in the event that it doesn't, you will never getsatisfaction from the things that you intended to accomplish. Clearly, whetheryour vocational dreams include farne, creative accomplishment, or adventure,today is the time to start working toward those dreams.

You may have worked yourself up the ladder from nurse to the headadministrator ofNew York's biggest hospital, for example, only to realize thatyou would rather live in a loft in SoHo and make a living as an artist.Altematively, you may be working sixteen hours a day repairing safety heimetsfor an environmental corporation in northem Canada when deep down youwant to be like your writer friends who are part of the Starbucks' laptop-and-cappuccino crowd. Whatever you think intuitively that you should be doing,you should give it some serious consideration and explore the possibilities.

Your work should be the principal expression for your mind and creativetalent. You can put your purpose, talents, character, and dreams into a career inmany ways if you use your imagination. Many options and opportunities awaityou, provided you look for them. Only you can determine what youspecifically want, however, and only you can put yourself in the right directiontoward getling it. In the words ofAmerican poet Walt Whitman, "Not I - notanyone else - can travel that road for you. You must travel it for yourself."

When choosing a new career, you must make every effort possible to selectone that is right for you. "00 not put your spoon into the pot that doesn't boilfor you," advises a Romanian proverb. Your pot will boil for you when yourcareer allows you to pursue some important purpose that can make a differencein this world. A proper career should also allow you to utilize the special talents

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p o r t o n t T h i n g s Y o u A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g 1 9

t h a t y o u w a n t t o u s e . T o r e a l l y w o r k f o r y o u , y o u r c a r e e r s h o u l d b e c o m p a t i b l e

w i t h y o u r c h a r a c t e r a n d t h e l i f e s t y l e y o u w o u l d l i k e t o l e a d .

C a r e e r d r e a m s d o c o m e t r u e f o r p e o p l e , b u t o n l y f o r s e l f - c o n f i d e n t

i n d i v i d u a l s w h o c o n s t a n t l y f o c u s a n d w o r k o n t h e m . L o o k a r o u n d , a n d y o u w i l l

s e e m a n y i n d i v i d u a l s l i v i n g t h e i r v o c a t i o n a l d r e a m s . P e o p l e h a v e t u r n e d t h e i r

h o b b i e s i n t o p a r t - t i m e b u s i n e s s e s t h a t h a v e e v e n t u a l l y b e c o m e m u l t i m i l l i o n -

d o l l a r b u s i n e s s e s . O t h e r s h a v e g i v e n u p c a r e e r s f o r w h i c h t h e y h a v e b e e n

h i g h l y e d u c a t e d t o p u r s u e c a r e e r s f o r w h i c h t h e y h a d n o e d u c a t i o n . D e s p i t e t h i s

d i s a d v a n t a g e , t h e y h a v e b e e n a b l e t o t u r n t h e i r d r e a m s i n t o r e a l i t i e s a n d c r e a t e

a b u n d a n c e i n t h e i r l i v e s .

L o n g a g o , y o u m a y h a v e d e c i d e d t h a t y o u r h e a r t ' s d e s i r e w a s t o b e a

c r i m i n a l l a w y e r , f o r e x a m p l e , b u t n o w y o u r e a l i z e t h a t y o u r e a l l y n e e d

s o m e t h i n g w i t h a l i t t l e m o r e m e a n i n g . T h e i d e a l i s t o a l w a y s w o r k a t s o m e t h i n g

t h a t m a k e s a d i f f e r e n c e , t o d o t h e t h i n g s y o u e n j o y , a n d t o u s e y o u r m o s t

c h e r i s h e d t a l e n t s .

I t i s n e v e r t o o l a t e f o r a c a r e e r c h a n g e ~- t h e b e s t t i m e t o p u r s u e y o u r

d r e a m c a r e e r i s t w e n t y y e a r s a g o a n d t o d a y . W h a t e v e r y o u w o u l d l i k e t o d o ,

y o u m u s t s e t i n m o t i o n t h e f o r c e s t h a t w i l l g e t y o u t h e r e . T h e l o n g e r y o u p u t

o f f p u r s u i n g y o u r d r e a m o f a f u l f i l l i n g c a r e e r , t h e m o r e t i m e b e c o m e s y o u r

e n e m y . T i m e w i l l s t e a l y o u r v o c a t i o n a l d r e a m s i f y o u k e e p w a i t i n g ~r t h e r i g h t

~oment. Y o u c a n a l w a y s c r e a t e m o r e m o n e y - b u t y o u c a n n e v e r ~reate m o r e

b~. \

. "

Y e a r s f r o m n o w , a s y o u r e f l e c t u p o n y o u r l i f e , y o u d o n ' t w a n t t o r e g r e t n o t

h a v i n g e a r n e d y o u r l i v i n g b y s i n g i n g , d e s i g n i n g s o f t w a r e , w o r k i n g w i t h

c h i l d r e n , b u i l d i n g t h i n g s w i t h y o u r h a n d s , t r a v e l i n g t o n e w c i t i e s , o r i n s p i r i n g

o t h e r s t o n e w h e i g h t s . 1 t m a y h u r t a l i t t l e t o r e a l i z e t h a t y o u h a v e o n l y d r e a m e d

a b o u t t h e i n t e r e s t i n g l i f e f i l l e d w i t h s p o n t a n e i t y a n d c r e a t i v i t y . I t w i l l p r o b a b l y

h u r t a l o t , i n f a c t . C l e a r l y , i t ' s n o t w h a t y o u b e c o m e - b u t w h a t y o u d o n ' t

b e c o m e t h a t w i l l h u r t m o s t i n t h e e n d .


9Do the Difficult and Uncomfortable If YouWould Like an Easy and Comfortable Life

As we discussed earlier, life is tough. Luckily, there is a way to make the gameof life much easier. You are about to be reminded about (or introduced to) anawesome, paradoxicallife principle. It is called The Easy Rule of Life.

Following The Easy Rule of Life can get you from Loserville to SuccessCity in record time. You mayaiso want to call this principle The Easy Rule ofSuccess. Once you master it, success will come relatively easy - much easierthan it came before you mastered this rule.

The Easy Rule of Life teIls us that when we always do the easy andcomfortable, life turns out difficult and uncomfortable. When we do thedifficult and uncomfortable, however, life turns out easy and comfortable.Think about it carefully, and you will see how this rule applies to your life.

Indeed, the principle that we must do the difficult and uncomfortable toexperience true satisfaction and well-being influences every area of our lives,including work, financial gain, raising children, friendship, love, health,fitness, and retirement. Taking the easy and comfortable way - sitting at horneand watehing a lot of no-brainer programs on television - will put you on adead-end street. Long-term satisfaction can only be attained by undertaking thechallenging activities that are at times difficult and frustrating. We must pay theprice with time, effort, and frustration in completing these activities.

In particular, think about how this awesome, paradoxieal life principleapplies to attaining anything related to success. To be sure, to have a lot ofsuccess in your life will not always be easy - you may have to do a lot ofdifficult and uncomfortable things. But once you attain this success, life will bemuch easier and much more comfortable. What's more, life will be much moresatisf)ring because you have accomplished something extraordinary.

The Easy Rule of Life teIls you that each day you should be doingsomething difficult and uncomfortable. If you have always wanted to write abook, for instance, but have resisted doing so, you are in the majority.

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s V o u A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g

2 1

A p p a r e n t l y 8 1 p e r c e n t o f A m e r i c a n s t h i n k t h e y s h o u l d w r i t e a b o o k - b u t o n l y

2 p e r c e n t h a v e c o m p l e t e d a m a n u s c r i p t .

T h i s i s o n e o f t h e r e a s o n s t h a t A m e r i c a n n o v e l i s t J o h n U p d i k e s a i d ,

" W r i t e r s m a y b e d i s r e p u t a b l e , i n c o r r i g i b l e , e a r l y t o d e c a y o r l a t e t o b l o o m , b u t

t h e y d a r e t o g o i t a l o n e . " I f y o u w a n t t o j o i n t h e s m a l l m i n o r i t y o f c r e a t i v e

i n d i v i d u a l s t h a t h a s c o m p l e t e d a m a n u s c r i p t , y o u s h o u l d f o r c e y o u r s e l f t o w r i t e

f o r a t l e a s t a n h o u r a r t w o e a c h d a y . Y o u m u s t , i n f a c t , g o i t a l o n e . T h i s m a y

c o n t i n u e t o b e d i f f i c u l t a n d u n c o m f o r t a b l e f o r a l o n g t i m e b u t e v e n t u a l l y y o u

w i l l h a v e t h e b o o k c o m p l e t e d .

A l a s , m o s t p e o p l e w o u l d r a t h e r b e c o m f o r t a b l e t h a n d o w h a t e v e r i t t a k e s

t o b e s u c c e s s f u l . B e d i f f e r e n t f r o m t h e m a s s e s - b e w i l l i n g t o b e

u n c o m f o r t a b l e ! I f y o u w a n t t o b e c o m e a p r o f e s s i o n a l s p e a k e r , b u t w o u l d b e

s c a r e d h a l f t o d e a t h t o s p e a k i n f r o n t o f m o r e t h a n t w o p e o p l e , t h e n c h o o s e t o

b e t e r r i b l y u n c o m f o r t a b l e . M a k e y o u r f i r s t s p e e c h i n f r o n t o f o n e h u n d r e d

p e o p l e . J u s t a s t e l l i n g , b e w i l l i n g t o d o y o u r f i r s t s p e e c h w r o n g , b u t a t l e a s t d o

i t . Y o u w i l l f e e l g r e a t b e c a u s e y o u w i l l k n o w t h a t y o u h a v e d o n e y o u r b e s t .

I f y o u w a n t t o b e t r u l y a l i v e a n d e x p e r i e n c e a s e n s e o f a c h i e v e m e n t a n d

s a t i s f a c t i o n , y o u h a v e t o c o n c e n t r a t e o n d o i n g m a n y d i f f i c u l t a n d

u n c o m f o r t a b l e t h i n g s - n o t j u s t o n e . ! t ' s d i f f i c u l t a n d u n c o m f o r t a b l e t o b e

h i g h l y o r g a n i z e d ; i t ' s d i f f i c u l t a n d u n c o m f o r t a b l e t o p a y a t t e n t i o n t o t h e

i m p o r t a n t t h i n g s i n l i f e ; i t ' s d i f f i c u l t a n d u n c o m f o r t a b l e t o s a v e m o n e y ; a n d i t ' s

d i f f i c u l t a n d u n c o m f o r t a b l e t o k e e p a g r e e m e n t s . R e g a r d l e s s o f h o w j o y l e s s

t h e s e t h i n g s a r e , g i v e u p y o u r c o m f o r t z o n e s a n d s t a r t d o i n g t h e m .

! t ' s a l l t o o e a s y t o w r i n g y o u r h a n d s a n d w h i n e a b o u t t h e l a c k o f

o p p o r t u n i t y i n t o d a y ' s w o r l d . ! t ' s m u c h h a r c t e r a n d m o r e u n c o m f o r t a b l e t o

a c k n o w l e d g e t h a t t h e r e i s a l o t o f o p p o r t u n i t y , s p o t i t , a n d c a p i t a l i z e o n i t . I f

y o u a r e n o t d o i n g s o m e t h i n g c o m f o r t l e s s a n d r i s k y e v e r y d a y , y o u a r e

s t a g n a t i n g a s a h u m a n b e i n g . T h e r e a r e p r o b a b l y a h u n d r e d d i f f e r e n t a r e a s i n

y o u r l i f e i n w h i c h y~ a r e t a k i n g t h e e a s y a n d c o m f o r t a b l e w a y a t t h i s t i m e .

M o s t p e o p l e subs~ibe t o t h e t h e o r y t h a t d i f f i c u l t y i s a g o o d r e a s o n f o r n o t

d o i n g s o m e t h i n g . O n F h e c o n t r a r y , t h e i d e a t h a t s o m e t h i n g i s d i f f i c u l t i s a g o o d

. /

r e a s o n f a r d o i n g i t . E v e r y e x t r a o r d i n a r y a c h i e v e m e n t w a s o n c e c o n s i d e r e d n o t

22 101 Really Impor "nt Things You Already Know, But Keep Forgetting

only difficult, but impossi~le by the experts. Yet this did not stop the peoplewho pulled off these ach~yements. Think Edison! Think Gandhi! ThinkMandela!

True greatness is not determined by status, power, and possessions. Thefoundation of greatness is good character, comprising such things as risk-taking, individuality, courage, and overcoming major obstacles and oppositionin accomplishing something extraordinary that is of service to others. It's notbecause the successful people of this world get all the breaks; the mostsuccessful people play the success game in a completely different way thanmost people do. They religiously follow The Easy Rule of Life and declare,"Look Ma, life's easy."

Whether you like it or not - and it has been my experience that mostpeople don't - the degree to which you follow The Easy Rule of Life willdetermine how much satisfaction and happiness you achieve throughout yourwhole life. Start using The Easy Rule of Life and your li fe will changeremarkably. You will want to kick yourself for having taken so much time toimplement it. But at least you will have gotten your life to work at this time,and you can go forward from here.

How long does it take to change your ways and start using The Easy Ruleof Life to your advantage? But a second or two. Then the uncomfortable workbegins of continuing to utilize The Easy Rule of Life. One day at a time -forever! Repetition makes the master. When you eventually achieve truesuccess in your life by using The Easy Rule of Life, you will joyfully tellyourself, "It's all in how you play the game, isn't it?"


1 0

O r d i n a r y P e o p l e A t t a i n E x t r a o r d i n a r y

S u c c e s s - Y o u C a n T o o !

2 3

H a v e y o u e v e r t h o u g h t a b o u t s o m e o n e y o u k n o w w h o h a s s u c c e e d e d i n

s o m e t h i n g q u i t e r e m a r k a b l e ? T h i s c o u l d b e s t a r t i n g a h i g h l y s u c c e s s f u l

b u s i n e s s , w r i t i n g a b l o c k b u s t e r - s e l l i n g b o o k , d e s i g n i n g a n a w a r d - w i n n i n g

h o u s e , o r g o i n g o u t w i t h a s t u n n i n g m e m b e r o f t h e o p p o s i t e s e x . Y o u a r e

w o n d e r i n g h o w s o m e o n e l i k e t h i s c o u l d p u l l i t o f f . T h e i n d i v i d u a l d o e s n ' t

a p p e a r t o h a v e a s m u c h t a l e n t a s y o u , b e a s s m a r t a s y o u , o r b e a s a t t r a c t i v e a s

y o u . 1 f t h i s p e r s o n c a n d o i t , w h y c a n ' t y o u ?

T o t h e e x t e n t t h a t y o u h a v e a b i l i t i e s t h a t c o m e a t l e a s t a s d o s e t o t h o s e o f

t h e a v e r a g e p e r s o n i n s o c i e t y , y o u a r e u n d o u b t e d l y r i g h t a b o u t t h e

a c c o m p l i s h e d p e r s o n n o t h a v i n g m o r e t a l e n t , i n t e l l i g e n c e , o r s e x a p p e a l t h a n

y o u . T h i s s h o u l d n ' t c o m e a s a b i g s u r p r i s e . Y o u d o n ' t h a v e t o b e a s a i n t o r a

g e n i u s t o m a k e a n i m p a c t o r b i g d i f f e r e n c e i n t h i s w o r l d . F a n t a s i e s a n d d r e a m s

d o n ' t h a v e t o b e a w a s t e o f t i m e . T r u t h b e k n o w n , e x t r a o r d i n a r y s u c c e s s i s

a t t a i n e d b y o r d i n a r y p e o p l e - w h o a r e n o t m u c h d i f f e r e n t f r o m y o u a n d m e .

P r a c t i c a l l y e v e r y s p e c t a c u l a r a c h i e v e m e n t w a s o n c e t h o u g h t i m p o s s i b l e .

W h a t i s i m p o s s i b l e t o d a y t o m o s t p e o p l e m a y b e t o m o r r o w ' s b r e a k t h r o u g h

s u c c e s s f o r s o m e o r d i n a r y , b u t m o t i v a t e d i n d i v i d u a l . I n m a n y c a s e s , o n e

f r u s t r a t e d p e r s o n i s s a y i n g , " I g i v e u p , i t c a n ' t b e d o n e , " w h i l e a n o t h e r

e m p o w e r e d p e r s o n i s r e s p o n d i n g t o t h e s a m e s i t u a t i o n w i t h " T h i s l o o k s l i k e a

g r e a t o p p o r t u n i t y t o c r e a t e s o m e t h i n g n e w a n d i n t e r e s t i n g . " I f y o u d o n ' t t h i n k

t h a t i t c a n b e d o n e , a t l e a s t g e t o u t o f t h e w a y o f t h e p e r s o n w h o i s a c t u a l l y

d o i n g i t .

T h e d i f f e r e n c e b e t w e e n s u c c e s s a n d f a i l u r e i s o f t e n p r e t t y s l i m . I t ' s u s u a l l y

n o t s o m u c h a b i g d i f f e r e n c e i n p e o p l e ' s a b i l i t i e s a s a d i f f e r e n c e i n p e o p l e ' s

s e l f - e s t e e m . M a n y i n d i v i d u a l s w i t h g r e a t n a t u r a l a b i l i t y h a v e b e e n

i m m o b i l i z e d b e c a u s e o f t h e i r i n a b i l i t y t o g e t t h e i r e s t e e m o u t o f t h e d e e p d i t c h

i n w h i c h i t r e s t s . I f y o u r e g u l a r l y h a v e b o u t s o f l o w s e l f - e s t e e m , i t i s i m p e r a t i v e

t h a t y o u d o w h a t i s n e c e s s a r y t o g e t o u t o f t h a t d i t c h a n d r a i s e y o u r c o n c e p t o f


yourself. With low self-esteem you will continue to experience frustration andfailure. Low self-esteem is a paralyzing disease that invariably producesunhappiness.

Here's the bottom line: Ordinary people attain extraordinary success -you can too! Indeed, you can do something truly spectacular if you refuse toaccept that it is impossible. Countless individuals have either worked at lousyjobs, failed miserably at many things, dropped out of school, got rejectedhundreds of times, goofed off for years, or did time in jail before achievingextraordinary success.

Within each of us, more than we ever care to admit, lies the power tochange our lives. We can have better health, deeper friendships, everlastinglove, more riches, enjoyable work, and greater freedom. The power lies not ingetting to Heaven, but in using our creativity on Earth.

No matter who you are, you must accept that you have a lot going for you.You must believe in yourself and set reasonable targets for achieving yourgoals. You may avoid creative and artistic pursuits because you don't think ofyourself as creative or artistic. Whether or not you consider yourself artisticallyinclined, try doing something artistic on a regular basis.

Take at least an hour or two to make a list of your skills, your interests, andyour strengths. You will be surprised at how much talent you have. Once youhave a firm idea of what you want out of life, you can start working towardattaining it. You must realize the many things that are possible. When you saysomething can't be done, soon after you will probably see someone doing it. Inmost cases the person doing it won't have any greater abilities or talent thanyou.

Set your sights high and you will likely accomplish something trulyremarkable in your life. You don't have to be overly ambitious - but you musthave enthusiasm and energy. It's a case of making the most of your creativityand will power. Decide what you would like to achieve in life, and then go afterit with conviction. In time, other people may be wondering how you couldhave succeeded in something quite remarkable - even though you aren't astalented, intelligent, attractive, or hardworking as they are!

1 0 1 R e a l ! y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s Y o u A l r e a d y K n o w , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g 2 5

1 1

O v e r n i g h t S u c c e s s H a p p e n s O n l y i n F a i r y

T a l e s , T r a s h y N o v e l s , a n d B a d M o v i e s

T r y i n g t o a t t a i n g r e a t s u c c e s s i n l i f e i s l i k e t r y i n g t o c l i m b a g r e a t m o u n t a i n .

T h e y b o t h i n v o l v e s u b s t a n t i a l r i s k , a c h a n c e f o r m a j o r d i s a p p o i n t m e n t , a n d a

s e n s e o f a d v e n t u r e . O n y o u r j o u r n e y t o s u c c e s s y o u w i l l e n c o u n t e r m a n y n e w

p r o b l e m s - b u t y o u w i l l e n c o u n t e r m a n y n e w o p p o r t u n i t i e s a n d w o n d e r f u l

e x p e r i e n c e s a s w e i l . Y o u m u s t b e w a r n e d , h o w e v e r , t h a t a t t a i n i n g y o u r g o a l s

w i l l l i k e l y t a k e a l o t l o n g e r t h a n y o u m a y t h i n k . N o t o n l y d o e s t h e m o u n t a i n

a l w a y s l o o k c l o s e r t h a n i t i s , t h e m o u n t a i n g e t s s t e e p e r a s y o u g e t c l o s e r .

P e r h a p s y o u h a v e e x p l o r e d y o u r d r e a m s a n d s e l e c t e d t h e f i e l d i n w h i c h y o u

w o u l d l i k e t o s u c c e e d . Y o u m a y w a n t t o o w n a f a n c y r e s t a u r a n t . Y o u m a y w a n t

t o m a k e a b i g d i f f e r e n c e i n t h e e n v i r o n m e n t a l m o v e m e n t . Y o u m a y w a n t t o

m a k e a n a m e f o r y o u r s e l f i n t h e f i e l d o f p u b l i c s p e a k i n g . W h a t e v e r a r e a y o u

h a v e c h o s e n , b e w a r n e d t h a t y o u c a n ' t t u r n i d e a s i n t o r e a l i t y o v e r n i g h t . I t j u s t

i s n ' t g o i n g t o h a p p e n - r e g a r d l e s s o f h o w t a l e n t e d , i n t e l l i g e n t , o r a t t r a c t i v e

y o u a r e .

I n N o r t h A m e r i c a t o d a y , t h e r e i s a p e r s i s t e n t b e l i e f t h a t i t i s p o s s i b l e t o

m a k e i t o v e r n i g h t . O n e d a y y o u a r e t a k i n g s i n g i n g l e s s o n s a n d t h e n e x t d a y y o u

a r e p e r f o r m i n g i n f r o n t o f 6 0 , 0 0 0 s c r e a m i n g f a n s i n N e w Y o r k ' s M a d i s o n

S q u a r e G a r d e n . O n e d a y y o u a r e a n u n k n o w n s t r u g g l i n g a c t o r i n P e o r i a ,

I l l i n o i s , a n d t h e n e x t d a y y o u a r e t u r n i n g d o w n r o l e s f o r s o m e o f H o l l y w o o d ' s

b i g g e s t u p c o m i n g m o v i e s . O n e d a y y o u a r e g r a d u a t i n g w i t h a n M B A a n d t h e

n e x t d a y y o u a r e r u n n i n g a F o r t u n e 5 0 0 c o m p a n y . M a g a z i n e s , n e w s p a p e r s ,

r a d i o , t e l e v i s i o n , a n d t h e I n t e r n e t p r o p a g a t e t h i s f a l s e b e l i e f a b o u t t h e m a k i n g

o f o v e r n i g h t s e n s a t i o n s . .

F a c t i s , y o u w o n ' t g e t y o u r n a m e i n l i g h t s o v e r n i g h t - n o m a t t e r h o w

m u c h y o u t h r o w y o u r h e a r t a n d s o u l i n t o i t . A n d i t p r o b a b l y w o n ' t h a p p e n i n a

y e a r o r t w o , o r e v e n f i v e . P a t i e n c e i s i m p o r t a n t . Y o u m u s t t a k e y o u r t i m e i n

s e a r c h o f f a r n e a n d f o r t u n e , a s s u m i n g t h a t ' s w h a t y o u w a n t t o a c h i e v e i n l i f e .

T h e g r e a t m o v i e d i r e c t o r F r a n c i s F o r d C o p p o l a o n c e c l a i m e d , " I ' v e b e e n


failing for, like, ten or eleven years. When it turns, it'll turn. Right now I'mjusttrying to squeeze through a very tight financial period, get the movie out, andput my things in order." As Coppola proved, good things come to people whowork at it and are willing to wait.

The important project you start today may bring you farne, fortune,romance, or adventure. It may take five, ten, or even twenty-five years,however. The famous are successful because they finish important and difficultprojects. Even in Hollywood, success is in good measure a matter of hangingon after others have let go. "I realized early on that success was tied to notgiving uP," reflected Harrison Ford. "Most people in this business gave up andwent on to other things. If you simply didn't give up, you would outlast thepeople who came in on the bus with you."

Clearly, success takes staying power and longevity. The fact that successtakes so long is a good thing, however. Most people can't handle success,especially ifit comes too quickly. That's why American author Elbert Hubbardwarned, "Pray that success will not come any faster than you are able to endureit." What's more, if it was possible to attain overnight success, no one wouldget real satisfaction from it.

Trust me on this one: Overnight success happens only in fairy tales, trashynovels, and bad movies. Given what is involved in achieving success, you willattain success much faster when you take your time and aren't desperate for it.If you want to be a success in any particular field, whether it's in movies orcomputers, it pays to stick around for awhile.

Shoot for conquering the world of business or politics by the year 2017 or2027 - instead of2010. This way your chances will be increased dramatically.Above all, be patient because anything worth having takes time.

1 0 1 R e a l l y I m p o r t a n t T h i n g s Y o u " ' I r e a d y K I 1 O W , B u t K e e p F o r g e t t i n g 2 7

1 2

T o K n o w a n d N o t t o D o 1 s N o t

Y e t t o K n o w

T h i n k y o u k n o w a l o t ? T h i n k a g a i n . I t i s c o m m o n l y a c c e p t e d i n W e s t e r n

s o c i e t y t h a t k n o w l e d g e i s p o w e r . N o t n e c e s s a r i l y s o ! K n o w l e d g e i s p o w e r o n l y

i f y o u u s e i t - a n d u s e i t p r o p e r l y . P u t a n o t h e r w a y , d o n ' t t e l l t h e w o r l d a b o u t

h o w m u c h y o u k n o w i f y o u a r e n ' t g o i n g t o u s e y o u r k n o w l e d g e f o r a n y t h i n g

b u t t a l k .

T h e B u d d h i s t s h a v e a p r o v e r b : " T o k n o w a n d n o t t o d o i s n o t y e t t o k n o w . "

N e e d l e s s t o s a y , k n o w l e d g e a n d w i s d o m a r e u s e l e s s i f y o u d o n ' t u s e t h e m t o

a c c o m p l i s h s o m e t h i n g w o r t h w h i l e . I f y o u a r e t o m a k e a n i m p o r t a n t d i f f e r e n c e

i n t h i s w o r l d , y o u m u s t p u t y o u r b l u e - c h i p k n o w l e d g e i n s y n c h w i t h y o u r

d e e p e s t v a l u e s a n d b e l i e f s a n d p u r s u e w h a t y o u t r u l y w a n t o u t o f l i f e .

F a c t i s , a c t i o n s p e a k s l o u d e r t h a n w o r d s - e v e n a l i t d e b i t o f a c t i o n i s

w o r t h m u c h m o r e t h a n a w h o l e l o t o f t a l k i n g . R e m e m b e r t h e o l d e x p r e s s i o n ,

"

101 really important things you already know, but keep forgetting

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