When the HARD Skills of Science Meet the Soft Skills of People

David Ryback, Ph.D.EQ Associates International

Space Telescope Science Institute

David Ryback on SOFT SKILLS:

Putting Emotional Intelligence

to WorkConnectAbility: Building Strong

Partnerships with Your Colleagues

Space Telescope Science Institute

Bottom LineWe’re afraid of listening closely for fear of losing sight of our own agenda.

The 4 Components of EI

• Know yourself: Self-awareness

• Control yourself: Self-management • Know others: Empathy

• Do the right thing: Creating success for yourself and others

What Causes Stress in Our Brain?

What Causes Stress in Our Brain?

• Lack of respect• Treated unfairly• Lack of appreciation• Unrealistic deadlines

Getting to Know Yourself and Others

• Have you ever felt stress at work? What’s your experience?

• Please find a partner next to you, and share.

What is Power?

• Hard power:Authority & coercion

• Soft power:Influence & persuasion

The 3 “Hard-to-Soft” Revolutions

• Information Revolution

• Mobility Revolution

• Defiance Revolution

WHY?

• Electronic media

• More savvy

• New mindsets

• New opportunities

The Skill of Understanding Primary Emotions

• Bad

• Mad

• Sad

• Glad

Soft Skills for You to Use

• Connect well with emotional awareness• Take charge with flexibility• Match personal skills with challenges• Respect individual differences• Use more emotional intelligence

Do Soft Skills Work?

Understand others 42%Manage relationships better 51%Influence others 46%

Resolve/manage conflict 43%Improve morale/motivation 34%Improve teamwork 44%

Overall Benefit

43.3%

Benefits of Soft Skills

• Sanofi-Aventis 12% increase in sales

• L’Oreal Increase in revenue--$2,558,360.

• U.S. Air Force $3 million/year

Hard Measures of Soft Skills

• Metrics on EI—Baron EQ-i or Ryback’s CAMS

• Social intelligence—360 surveys

• Rate of turnover

Soft Skills in a Hard World

Soft Skills in the World of Space Telescope Science

Putting Your Soft Skills to Work

•Which of these soft skills might be effective with your associates or even friends or family?

13 Days in September (L. Wright)

Personal “Truths”

“‘Truth’ is nothing more than a concept describing majority consensus of valued peers.”

-- Canadian Psychologist(David Ryback)

“The two greatest mysteries in all of nature ..”Michio Kaku, The Future of the Mind

When Telescopes Revealed the Truth

•Copernicus (c. 1500)•Kepler (c. 1609)•Galileo (1610)•Johann Demisiani (April 14, 1611)

The Nature of “Truth” in Astronomy

1. Our planet 2. The sun

3. Our Milky Way galaxy 4. Innumerable galaxies 5. Big Bang Theory

Our Milky Way

Soft Skills at the International Level

Soft Skills Make Way for Camp David Peace

Accords

Carl Rogers: The Pioneer of Soft Skills

• Entering perceptual world of other

• Understand other’s “private world”

• No facade

3 Ways to Grow Your Success

• Service to others

• Know yourself

• Create a “safe place”

Feeling Misunderstood

•With partner: • Can you recall a time when

you felt misunderstood (at work or at home)? How did it make you feel?

• Tell your story

• Tell your story• Allow vulnerability

• Tell your story• Allow vulnerability• What can you learn about yourself?

Discovery

What soft skill might have helped? 

Overview

• Choose one soft skill that you can immediately begin to apply to your work or family life.

So …

So … don’t be afraid to listen closely. Your agenda will not disappear. And … you will be:

•A better manager (by 51%)•More liked and appreciated by your colleagues

•Much more productive (by 43.3%)•A better partner and parent•Overall, a happier person

3 Simple Ways to Be Successful!

Focus on being of service to others.• Be real about yourself.• So others feel safe to be themselves

with you!

The Soft Skill of Authenticity

•To thine own self,Be true!

Soft Skills for Greater Success

Become more effective …By being more affective!And even happier!

All the best,

David Ryback

References

• Spencer, L.M., Jr. & Spencer, S. Competence at Work. NY: Wiley & Sons, 1993.

• GAO Report, Military Recruiting, submitted to Congress on Jan.30, 1998.

• Ryback, D. Putting Emotional Intelligence to Work. Boston, MA: Butterworth-Heinemann, 1998.

• Jennings, S. & Palmer, B.R., Enhancing sales performance through emotional intelligence. Organizations and People, 14(2), 55-71, 2007.

• Walter Mischel, The Marshmallow Test. NY: Little, Brown & Co., 2014

• Lawrence Wright, Thirteen Days in September. NY: Knopf, 2014.