what is a true friend

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    The only way to have a friend is to be one.Ralph Waldo Emerson

    We all want to have true friends, but the quality of our friends depend on us. If you want to have true friends, you should be a true friend yourself. By beinga true friend, people will love to be around you and many of them will eventually become your true friends.

    In addition, being a true friend is a good way to solve relationship problems. Its difficult to change other people, but you can always change yourself. You canthen solve the otherwise unsolved problems in relationships.

    Here Id like to share 17 tips to become a true friend. It may take years to learn to apply them but they are essential to boost your relationships.

    Here they are:

    1. Befriend yourself

    Friendship with oneself is all important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world.Eleanor Roosevelt

    This is an essential first step if you are to be a true friend. If you dont even

    accept yourself, how can you accept others? You may have made mistakes in the past that you cant forget. But forgive yourself for them. You perhaps dont have thetraits you want in life. But accept yourself as you are.

    2. Accept others

    A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.Unknown

    After you befriend yourself, you will be in a good position to accept others. Other people may do you wrong or have some bad habits you dont like. But you are not perfect yourself so there is no reason for you not to accept them.

    3. Make time

    At the end of your life, you will never regret not having passed one more test,not winning one more verdict or not closing one more deal. You will regret timenot spent with a husband, a friend, a child, or a parent.Barbara Bush

    Sometimes we are too busy to provide time for relationships, even for importantpeople in our life. That most likely happens because we put relationships too low in our priority list. If we regard relationships as high priority, time wont bea problem. We will make time for relationships.

    4. Be a good listener

    Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer.Ed Cunningham

    The art of listening is one of the most difficult arts to master. I experience it myself. Sometimes I talk with a friend but dont carefully listen to what he says. Sometimes Im introduced to a new person but dont carefully listen to her name.A true friend doesnt do that. A true friend is a good listener.

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    5. Enrich others life

    Friendship is a treasured gift, and every time I talk with you I feel as if Im getting richer and richer.Unknown

    A true friend provides value to others. She wants people who meets her to be enriched in their life. If you want to do that, you should live a lifestyle of value. This way you amass value in your life you can then distribute to others.

    6. Understand first

    Everyone looks at life through his own lens. Often we expect others to see lifethrough the same lens as ours, but that will create a lot of problems. A true friend is someone who is willing to look through other peoples lenses first. He tries to understand why they think and act that way.

    One thing I find helpful for this is learning about personality. Learning aboutpersonality helps me understand why people behave differently from me in certainsituations. A good, easy-to-digest book on this subject is Personality Plus.

    7. Find common ground

    Finding common ground helps you connect with new friends quickly. The common ground allows you to talk to others about something they are interested in and thereby build relationships with them.

    To make it easier to find common ground, you should enlarge your ground. The larger your ground, the easier it is for you to connect with others. Two simple ways to enlarge your ground is reading a lot and listening a lot.

    8. Be interested

    If you want to be interesting you should first be interested. Be curious. Cultivate interest about many things. If you do that, you can genuinely be enthusiastic when people talk to you about something. People will feel appreciated and love

    to be around you.

    9. Take initiative to help

    Make use of your friends by being of use to them.Benjamin Franklin

    A true friend doesnt wait until someone asks his help. Instead, he takes the initiative to help others. This, of course, is easier said than done. To do this, you should be on the lookout for needs. Be sensitive. Often you can find others needs through what they implicitly say. You may also see it through their body language. When you sense a need, think about how you can help them and take the initiative to help.

    10. Trust others

    Confidence is the foundation of friendship. If we give it, we will receive it.Harry E. Humpreys

    If you treat others as good and trustworthy people, they will also treat you likewise. Believe in your heart that people are naturally good, even when they seemto be the opposite. People will feel how you believe in them and they will be touched by your sincerity.

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    11. Rebuke when you should

    In giving advice, seek to help, not please, your friend.Solon

    A true friend is not afraid of saying the truth, even if its not convenient to the ones who hear it. A true friend cares too much about the persons wellness thathe cant afford to let him live wrongly. Always have others best interest in your heart and be honest to them.

    12. Know the right time to do things

    Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time forsilence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when its all over.Gloria Naylor

    A true friend knows the right time to praise, the right time to listen, and theright time to rebuke. She knows when to come and when to stay away. A true friend masters the art of timing.

    13. Have integrity

    There can be no friendship without confidence and no confidence without integrity.Samuel Johnson

    Integrity is the foundation of true friendship. Be sure that you do what you say. You can only build true friendship if you are true to yourself and others.

    14. Commend others

    Reprove your friend privately, commend him publicly.Solon

    People need appreciation. They need to know that you appreciate them. Often we a

    re quick to criticize but slow to commend. Lets make it the opposite. Sincerely commend them when they do something right. Even better, commend them publicly.

    15. Leverage others potential

    My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me.Henry Ford

    A true friend wants to see the people around them live up to their maximum potential. You can do this by helping your friends recognize and develop their personal strengths.

    16. See the positive side of others

    A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knowsthat you are slightly cracked.Bernard Meltzer

    A true friend knows you good enough to see your weaknesses but he still believesin your potential. To become a true friend, you should believe that your friends are good on the inside no matter how bad their outward appearance might be. Itsby this belief that you can sincerely encourage them.

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    17. Be present in difficult times

    True friendship isnt about being there when its convenient; its about being there when its not.Unknown

    This is the test of true friendship. Fake friends will be with you when you arehappy since they want to share your happiness. But fake friends wont be with youin difficult times. Only true friends will choose to be with you in difficult times.

    So, to be a true friend, be with your friends in their dark moments. Be with them even if you need to let go your own convenience. It may be the most difficulttip of all, but its the mark of true friendship.