tx citizen 3.12.15

VOLUME FOURI S S U E 1 103 .12 .15

VOLUME FOURI S S U E 1 103 .12 .15

Evangelical Stunt Workers to Make Local Rivers Famous | A Farberer St Patrick's Day

"Rel

igio

ns c

hang

e; b

eer

and

win

e re

mai

n."

Her

vey

All

en

$2

,422

,439

.18

P LUS : 7 DAY NEW BRAUNFELS L IVE MUS IC GU IDEP LUS : 7 DAY NEW BRAUNFELS L IVE MUS IC GU IDE

Full-Contact ArtThe Mosaics

of Jerimiah Heye Page 6





V O T E N O W !ACCESS THE SURVEY AT

txcitizen.ROCKS

TX C

ITIZ

EN11

11 N

. Wal

nut A

venu

e N

ew B

raun

fels,

TX

7813

083

0.35

8.24

93

All

orig

inal

con

tent

is c

opyr

ight

TX

Citi

zen.

TX

Citi

zen

is pu

blish

ed

ever

y Th

ursd

ay.

One

cop

y (p

er p

erso

n) o

f TX

Citi

zen

is av

aila

ble

free

of c

harg

e, w

ith th

e pr

ior w

ritte

n co

nsen

t of T

X C

itize

n re

quire

d to

rem

ove

mul

tiple

cop

ies

from

dist

ribut

ion

poin

ts.

Mul

tiple

cop

ies

and

back

issu

es a

re a

vaila

ble

at T

X C

itize

n of

fices

for $

2.50

eac

h.

STA

FF /

CO

NTA

CT

Publ

isher

/Ed

itor-i

n-C

hief

Mik

e Re

ynol

ds

Dire

ctor

of D

istrib

utio

n C

hase

Coc

hran

Art

Dire

ctor

Kay

la W

alla

ce

Edito

rial:

new

s@tx

citiz

en.c

omA

dver

tisin

g: s

ales

@tx

citiz

en.c

om

Dist

ribut

ion:

dis

tribu

tion@

txci

tizen

.com

2 AD SALES 830.358.2493

table of contents

8Citizen

SoundcheckThe ONLY guide of i ts kindfor the NB/SM Metroplex!

12

1st WordEvangelical cash-grabbers are coming to the rivers to make sure nobody's having any fun in ways they don't l ike. Because of all the rapes and deaths and whatnot.

3

4Unfair Pie Chart

We prove our point using faultylogic and disingenuous methods.

It's the only reportage somepeople respect.

6 Cover StoryYou like ti les? We got ti les.

Last WordColby responds.14

The County sMost Wanted

Look Daddy!Mommys in the paper!

Ask a MexicanGustavo of fends in

two languages.

11 On OccasionEd on St Patrick's Day

ADVERTISE WITH US830.358.2493

2 AD SALES 830.358.2493

Karaoke Thursday & Sunday

DJs Wednesday Friday Saturday

989 Loop 337 830.626.2253 /SweetDreamsNB

118 Common St.830.387.4466

Stop by fora BIG, JUICYBURGER!

SP

UD RANCH

Open Mon-Sat 11 to 8Closed Sundays

1 9 7 S . S e g u i n Av e 8 3 0 . 6 2 9 . 0 5 4 01 9 7 S . S e g u i n Av e 8 3 0 . 6 2 9 . 0 5 4 0

Stay warm

with Ludwigs

!Stay warm

with Ludwigs

!

/TXCitizenSTALK usGO AHEAD...

Union StStation

Duckys

E.

San

An

ton

io S

t Union St

283 South Union St 979.450.6473babycaketruffles.com

We've Moved! C

ome Visit!

Plus clear r iver pecan co ice cream,

fresh from freder icksburg!

215 S. Seguin Downtown NB 830.620.9188

Join us forLunch!

w w w . o l i v e s i t a l i a n . c o m

Tuesday-Saturday11am - 2pm

/olivesitalianmarket243 N. Union Ave830-629-2662 Like us on

New and Vintage Vinyland Turntables

Classic Rock Alternative PunkReggae - Funk Soul Country

B U Y S E L L T R A D E

2 AD SALES 830.358.24932 AD SALES 830.358.2493 TXCITIZEN.COM 3

First of all, we want to thank each of yall that stepped up and helped us raise the $500 it took to get hold of the Citys 4-B and Chamber of Commerce contracts. There were a few surprise donors in there, tell you what. Seems weve hit a nerve with this one. Well have the breakdown of that data over the next couple months. Theres a lot of it to digest, all of it delicious. Now, on to this weeks madness

Carpet bagging, religious profiteers to do the bidding of Can-Ban advocatesOut of state production company to chronicle rapes and deaths along rivers for church movie

Jay Hix Jones, a producer on Hoarders and 1,000 Ways to Die, has, possibly intentionally or maybe not, become a high-profile advocate for the people that brought us the Disposable Container Ban (an appeal of which goes to court immediately after we go to press this week). Its important to note that Hix Jones doesnt produce documentaries he makes reality television, which is something that looks like documentary but isnt. Which hopefully isnt a surprise to anybody.

Hes also an evangelical Christian now, and has partnered up with Luke Holter, who markets himself as a prophet, and Billy Dorsey, who works for Joel Osteens mega-church in Houston. These guys are neck deep in Christian media, which is a thing I know a thing or two about.

Yeah, thats right.When I was 16 years old, I began my radio career at evangelical blowtorch KYMS in southern California. Over the next few years, I got to see exactly what went on behind the scenes in Christian media. Its safe to say that when business and religion mix, standard business ethics are discarded. Everybody is pretending to be something they arent,

because these enterprises are run very much as personality cults.

Employees are instructed that their jobs arent jobs at all, but ministries. Most of us work for the benefit of

ourselves and our families. Theres never been a better word

than ministry to get people to place their families and their own interests beneath those of an organization and its management. Unless youre an actual clergy-person, when someone you work for tells you your job is your ministry, get out. It means they want to make demands of you in the name of God. For minimum wage.

As distasteful as I found that world, I went right back into it in the late 1990s. You know, to meet girls and whatnot. Still very much a cesspool of manipulation, personality worship, and counterfeit virtue, along with enough Vicodin to kill an elephant (the puritan thing is strictly for show). There were some great people who werent Vicodin freaks there too, but the ratio of good-to-bad was much, much lower than youd find in a secular (normal) business. I got back out.

Religious media attracts people looking for an easy mark, and willing to say or do whatever it takes to get what they want. And why shouldnt they have what they want, even if its yours at the moment? God wouldnt have put you in their life if it wasnt to get something from you, right?

Its a predatory business, with each level of management claiming moral authority over the ones below. Imagine going to work and not only having to prove yourself competent, but that Jesus said its ok for you to have a promotion. Imagine having your boss tell you he prayed about it, and go on to relay a message from the Lord which says He (Jesus) has plans for you at your current pay-grade. Good grief, it would be wrong, disobedient, to promote you.

Yeah. Its that kind of world.Anyhow, here are the quotes that Hix

Jones provided to local and San Antonio media regarding this project:

Continued on page 5.

MIKEREYNOLDS

WITH

WORD1ST What time is it? Seriously. This isn't one of those chrleader things where I ye, "What time is it?" And then you ye, "It's wine time!" I'm ok admiing that I'm not much of a chrleader, and I don't know anyone that wants to s this body in a chrleading outfit. I'm refeing to this time change. It throws me o more every year. The only positive part of it is that the clock in my car is finay right again. I suose if you're not as bier as me about the lost hour of slp, the other positive aspect of daylight savings time is gaining an extra hour of sunlight. And let's face it, there is no point in having an extra hour of sunlight at our disposal if we don't use it wisely. And by that I mean to drink more wine, obviously. I might have just changed my whole aitude about daylight savings time. In fact, I could almost do a Longshot chrleading routine. But I won't. For your sake. - Josh McFarling

HOURS:Mon-urs: 6-10pm

Fri: 6-11pm Sat: 5-11pmSun: 10am-4pm

(brunch: 10am-2pm)

133 Landa Strt(Across the street from the Landmark)830.837.5667

Well Transform Your Home from this:

To this!

Well Transform Your Home from this:

To this!

Remodel and Construction!

Room Additions New Homes Total Rem

odels

"Our remodels don't look like remodels."

Call Jeff Henry at [email protected] 1111 N. Walnut Ave

4 AD SALES 830.358.2493

Is there City Hall nancial data youd like to see unfairly graphed?Send your suggestions to [email protected].

Every week, we present local government data in a patently unfair format, comparing apples to oranges, as it were, in order to arbitrarily make a point. This week: How much taxpayer scratch City Hall shelled out in local media spending in 2014. The players are the Houston-owned Herald-Zeitung, KGNB/KNBT Radio, and your TX Citizen.

If these same values were to be expressed as pounds of Wurst, they would weigh-in like this:

Bonus: unfair sausage ScaleBonus: unfair sausage Scale

$5,146.43

$41,141.67

Houston-OwnedHerald-Zeitung

88.8 lbsHouston-OwnedHerald-Zeitung

11.2 lbsKGNB/KNBT

Radio

O lbsYour

TX Citizen

KGNB/KNBTRadio

YourTX Citizen

City Hall media funds spent in 2014

Total Prize Pool:

$46,308.10

Total Wurst Pool: 100 Pounds

Source: City of New Braunfels Check Register - nbtexas.org

Get a Jumpstart on Spring!Get a Jumpstart on Spring!

Its time to clean off your roof, spruce up the flowerbeds, mulch, and test your irrigation systems!

Nows the time to weed, compost and aerate your lawn so you can enjoy

thick green turf this season.

Call us today for a free estimate on maintaining your lawn for the season, or for a one-time cleanup

to get you ready for spring!

83O.6O9.7552Whitley Reddell's Total Landscape Maintenance

Best Damn Lunch Specialin New Braunfels!

12-4 Monday-Friday $6.99 Lunch Specials

Specials Include Drink and Side

Best Damn Lunch Specialin New Braunfels!

12-4 Monday-Friday $6.99 Lunch Specials

Specials Include Drink and Side

830.620.9091 www.scoresnb.com223 W San Antonio St, Downtown New Braunfels

St Partys daycelebrationwith 3 Man Front!

Upcoming Shows March 19 & 20: Bo Phillips Band

March 27: MOD ($5 Cover)







830-620-6211144 S. Seguin Ave | New Braunfels TX

SUNLOAN.COM

Tournament time is the perfect time to visit Sun Loan. Right now you can get a loan up to $1,300* and pay no interest for 30 days. Thats right, zero interest, and no

payday loan trap! So before you fill out your bracket, talk to the experts at Sun Loan.

Need some help? Let the Sun shine in!

30 DAYS INTEREST FREELOANS UP TO

$1300*Visit office for details. Offer expires March 31, 2015

*Subject to our liberal lending policies.

This March, theres one sure winner!

This March, theres one sure winner!

1528 E Common St | 830.608.9111

Massage | Waxing | Facials | Makeup

March is a lucky month!

FREE $10 Gift Cardwith every $60 purchaseNot valid with any other offer. Limit one coupon per person.

Expires 3/31/15

Now HiringMassage Therapists!

Please call or stop by to apply

Mon & Sat by Appointment only 9am - 3pm

Tues - Fri9am - 5:30pm

4 AD SALES 830.358.2493 TXCITIZEN.COM 5

Continued from page 3.

Quotes to the Houston-Owned Herald-Zeitung:It saddens me. I call it a soul danger zone. My goal is to get rid of the party, (Note: Hix Jones likely holds this position because Jesus never showed up to a party and turned water [or Himself] into alcohol.)

Well put out a call to all the churches in the state of Texas and to all Christian student groups to come join us reaching out now to every church within a 300-mile radius and Theyll want to get involved with this, because New Braunfels is a place that needs attention. (Note: This is called carpet bagging.)

Per HZ: he said plans are to interview tubers to learn about the citys river party phenomenon and infamous party culture, to film the trios evangelism on the rivers, and to talk to city leaders who arent happy with the overturn of the can ban. (Note: City leaders no doubt to include former Mayor Gale Pospisil, recalled Councilman Ken Valentine and former Councilwoman/Democrat Kathleen Krueger.)

To the San Antonio Express-News:When you change somebodys life and lead them to Christ, theyre not going to be doing beer bongs and bringing stripper poles on the river, (Note: Whoa. Thats thats some ignorant stuff right there. First of all, beer bongs are both pass and illegal in the city limits, which means the crew will likely have to bring their own, which we figure at a 50/50 chance of happening. Second, when has a stripper pole ever been operational on a river? Oh? Hix Jones just made that up? Ok, we get it now. #liar)

Of course, the really good stuff came from a Facebook thread Hix Jones was tagged in, and commented on, on February 26:As we all know, there is a party culture on the river especially during Memorial Day, and with this culture brings an increase in fights, arrests, rapes, deaths, public intoxication, indecent exposure, accidents, trash on the river etc etc

etc the list goes on and on. (Note: Rapes? Deaths? Yall knew about this and didnt tell me? He says you all knew about it.)

And while there still may be campfires, horse shoe games, etc, the cases of rapes, violence, indecent exposure, arrests, fights, accident, etc etc increase ten fold during the Holiday Weekend. (Note: Oops. Somebodys pants are EN FUEGO.)

So our next order of business is to order the police reports for the last five years and see what we come up with. Im going to go out on a limb here and guess that Hix Jones is completely full of the baloney. Well let you know.

The PresserHey. Heres a lil sumpin from the press release Hix Jones company, Hungry Fish Media, wrote up for the production. These are not people that feel bound by the truth (emphasis is ours, punctuation errors are all theirs):

Every Memorial Day weekend a floatopia invades the cool waters transforming the town into one of the most popular summer tourist destinations in the south; think South Padre, Daytona, and Cancun combined and then multiplied by Vegas and Ibiza.

Public intoxication, indecent exposure, fights, drugs, arrests, and even deaths are all part of the experience. Its one irresponsible wild ride down this lazy river that seems to grow in popularity every summer. . FLOAT follows Jones, Grammy Award Winner Pastor Billy Dorsey and Best Selling Author Dr. Luke Holter as they immerse themselves into the local river party culture.

Together the team investigates how the river party phenomenon began, so that they may effectively infiltrate & influence it using their unique spiritual gifts. Through a combination of high definition aerial videography, jay walking interviews, and reality party coverage, Float takes one of the most current and fresh looks at evangelism Texas has ever seen.

Wow! Multiply South Padre, Daytona and Cancun by Vegas and Ibiza? Hungry Fish Media, its time for you to shut up. Seriously now, shut up. Youre a liar. Shut your lying mouth, liar. And doing all this lying in the name of Jesus, too. Fantastic. Yall are a great witness for your faith. Were sure Hes proud of you.

Fun Fact: Evangelicals vs Mainstream ChristiansWed bet that most of the people on the river would identify as Christian if asked. But it seems only Evangelicals get involved in media, and they bring a puritan standard with them to prove their superiority, all the while denying thats the case.. In other words, theyre a better type of Christian than the average one walking around the mean streets of New Braunfels. You can tell from the camera crew and the smug attitude and the secret drinking and sex they think no one has any idea about.

Heres Your TakeawayNow that weve seen how Hix Jones is portraying our fair city around the state, check these quotes from Can-Ban pusher Bill Norvell, as he outlined the Kitchen Cabinets strategy for destroying local tourism in a letter to his political cohorts a few years back. Then tell us Hix Jones isnt working out of their playbook:

Publicity throughout the state is absolutely necessary. Then, and only then, will the pocket books of those in town be reduced in size, and then and only then, will the powers that be start to do something about it. We were close to this objective about five years ago, but let up.

Tell the world how bad behavior is in New Braunfels in the summer months, and couple it with stories of arrests, knifings, killings, etc., and the Yahoos as well as the families will find other places to go. It must be this combination of advertising to get this place cleaned up.

The Yahoos must be scared off by news about law enforcement, arrests, etc. and the families persuaded not to come because of the Yahoos.

You know what? This whole thing is probably all coincidence. Forget we said anything.

\m/

Mike ReynoldsPublisher/Editor-in-Chief

Get a Jumpstart on Spring!Get a Jumpstart on Spring!

Its time to clean off your roof, spruce up the flowerbeds, mulch, and test your irrigation systems!

Nows the time to weed, compost and aerate your lawn so you can enjoy

thick green turf this season.

Call us today for a free estimate on maintaining your lawn for the season, or for a one-time cleanup

to get you ready for spring!

83O.6O9.7552Whitley Reddell's Total Landscape Maintenance

You'reOverpaying

forInsuranceCall Now and Save!

Auto - Home - BusinessBonnie Rickaway - Agent

830-822-2778www.brauntexinsurance.com


Hair & HeartsHair & Hearts5th Annual

Blues FeStivalPresented by: The New Braunfels Blues Society, Oma Gruenes Secret Garten, and Blinders Hair Salon

Saturday, March 21at Oma Gruenes Secret Garten!

1263 Gruene Road

BBQ & Bands begin at 1pmRaffle & Silent Auction

Saturday, March 21at Oma Gruenes Secret Garten!

1263 Gruene Road

BBQ & Bands begin at 1pmRaffle & Silent Auction

Music by:Kim & Her Bad Habits The Monty Guitar Tyler BandAll the way from New Orleans, Gypsy Elise and Her Royal Blues Band

Donating hair ?Blinders Hair Salonwill be on hand toharvest your donations!

Currently AcceptingCash donationsSilent Auction & Raffle Items

BENEFITTING

The Pink Heart Funds is a group of dedicated volunteers who support and enhance the lives of those affected by cancer and other conditions.

If you would like to help, call Tracy at 830.625.1045www.OMALOVESYOU.com

Sponsered by

One of the many reasons I like art is in its existential quality. Art is an existence, a physical presence that springs from nothing.

Certainly before creation, there is an idea, which is ethereal. Ideas exist, but they are existences that are beyond sensory perceptions. We cannot see, feel, touch, hear or taste the idea (although the notion of tasting an idea is interesting, to say the least. Maybe it tastes like monkey).

Those sensory perceptions, however, are satisfied once the idea manifests into a physical presence existence from nonexistence (ie; monkey stew from a bad idea).

Yet, the existential quality of art does not begin and end with the artist. The viewer becomes part of the process as well. The individual looks at the art, which creates some type of emotive response within that individual, reinforcing the certainty of existence. Whether the art creates in the individual a sense of beauty, joy, repulsion (especially in the case of monkey stew) or even apathy, there is something there and that something is from where meaning springs.

The relationship between viewer and what is viewed is complex, relying on way too many variables to easily break down into a tidy package.

With mosaics, that sensory relationship between viewer and art takes on a different level of complexity because it is tactile art, art that we can experience visually and physically.

The biggest problem I have had with painting and drawing is that you can never actually touch the piece, said mosaic artist Jerimiah Heye. You are always separated from it.

When I was traveling across Europe, I had seen a number of great and important pieces of art, but youre always separated and I couldnt really connect with it, he said. Having something that you can put your hands on, to touch, is a completion of a full experience of enjoying that artwork. To me, thats the most meaningful part.

Jerimiahs work shows a variety of styles: Art Nouveau, abstraction, Impressionism and more. The artist also has an impressive understanding of his crafts history, as some of his works show a command of the Eastern Orthodox iconic style. One of his mosaics, showing underwater scenes, looks like it came of the ancient walls of Crete.

Another piece, The Man, appears to pay homage to the Classical artist El Greco, whom Jeremiah expressed a fondness for. The piece shows a man, who is not facing the viewer, opening his arms to the sky is some unidentified emotive, but significant moment. The overwhelming expression lies in the mans physical form, which is exceptional. Our own emotive experiences dictate what we think the Man is expressing.

I leave it open for interpretation, Jerimiah said. I really wanted to get an overly expressive feeling out of it just something that blows up and makes you want to yell.

In his newest work, the artist branches into a more abstract design, a Folklorico dancer in an almost Fauvist feast of colors. More than that, though, she gives an impression of action as she twirls, her skirt leaving behind a residue of colorful mixtures. The dancers movement is further accentuated by a facing piece, which is a dancer at rest.

TXCITIZEN.COM 7

What I set out to do was to fully accomplish movement in what you are seeing, Jerimiah said. I have never seen any mosaic artist do that.

I put these two ladies facing each other, one static whose every detail is perfect, who is facing one who is twisting, he said. You can see the abstracted colors and their blending, somewhat exaggerated, which bleeds into the idea of movement.

Color vibrancy is more than the color of the tiles in and of themselves, Jerimiah explained.

Really, it isnt necessarily the colors but the contrasts in those colors, such as placing blue next to black, he said. It takes just as long to plan out a piece as it does to physically make it. This is because I spend a lot of time making sure the colors are right and that all of the colors will compare and contrast exactly how I want them to.

Another interesting facet to Jerimiahs works is the effort he puts into not just the subject, but the background as well. Doing so, he points out, makes the work multi-faceted, as the backgrounds do in Da Vincis portraits.

I like to add a lot of movement to the background, he said. Instead of just appreciating the subject of the piece, the background will add more meaning to it as time goes on.

As you look at something over and over again, your observation of that object matures, the artist said. Thats when you start to notice things you didnt notice in the beginning. The background then starts to take precedence over the subject, and so it gives me more room to play. I find it makes for something you can enjoy a lot longer, makes for something you want to explore even more.

The planning and constructing process is arduous, explained Jerimiah, who also works as a paramedic in San Antonio. Before any work is done, he sketches out his plan in exact detail.

Building a mosaic is a pretty laborious process, he said. I make everything from scratch. I start with a 25-pound block of clay, I roll it out, fire it, glaze it to whatever color I want, re-fire it, then trim and shape it like a big jigsaw puzzle.

Going from idea to finished product can take a month, and thats a month at eight hours a day, the artist explained. Its pretty involved and there is a lot of trial and error, and a lot of planning. Theres also the surprise factor, like when you pull something out of the kiln and doesnt look like you wanted it to.

Jerimiah has completed a number of mosaics in his 15 years, including three for the City of San Antonio. For the Boy Scouts of America, he did a stunning floor piece of the groups logo. He says that producing a quality product is well worth all the hard work.

Its a good feeling when you put something in that you know is going to last forever, that it will look the same in 30 years as it did the day it was put in, he said. I also take pride in how I install the mosaic because I want to make sure it will last forever.

You can view photos of Jeremiahs work or contact him on his Facebook page. If you wish to see his work up close, you can do so at Longshot Wine Bar on Landa Street.

And, yes, you are encouraged to touch.Being able to touch the piece adds

another layer of excitement for the viewer, he said. With a mosaic, its hard to take the tactile out of the meaning.

Full-Contact ArtThe Mosaics of Jerimiah Heye By Nick Rogers



8 AD SALES 830.358.2493

Thu 3.12

Adobe VerdeScott Boddicker

6pm

Oma Gruenes Secret GartenJam Night

6pm

Phoenix SaloonJeffrey Ryan Vaughn

5pm

AJs Ale HouseRock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show

9pm

Billys Ice HouseBreelan Angel

8pm

Gruene HallWalt Wilkins & the Mystiqueros

6pm

Hippy GypsyKnotty Grove

6pm

The Pour HausDillon Myers

8pm

Rileys TavernMandy Rowden

9pm

Fri 3.13

Adobe Verde

JJ Garrett Band

6:30pm

The Happy Cow

TBA

8pm

Oma Gruenes Secret Garten

Empty Handed Vagabonds

6pm

Phoenix Saloon

Doug Kent

5pm

The Nightowls

9pm

Watering Hole Saloon

Paul Sanchez & Wrangler Country

8pm


9pm

Alpine Haus RestaurantOff the Grid Polka Band

6pm

Billys Ice HouseStephen Chadwick

8pm

Gruene HallRoger Creager

w/ Shane Smith & the Saints

7pm, $25

The Pour HausNick Verzosa & the Noble Union

8:30pm

Rileys TavernThe Beaumonts

9pm, $8

River Road Ice HouseThe Damn Quails

8pm

Vineyard at GrueneJeff Martinec

7pm

Sat 3.14

Adobe Verde

Kenndrid Spirits

6:30pm

The Happy Cow

TBA

9pm


The Lesti Huff Band

1pm

Adam Johnson Band

6pm

Phoenix Saloon

The Georges

9pm

Thanks, Kent.



9pm

Billys Ice HouseRumor Town

8pm

Gruene HallMidnight River Choir

1pm

Roger Creager

w/ Dalton Domino

8pm, SOLD OUT

NB Farm to MarketPete & Sean

9am

The Pour HausJeremy Steding Band

9:30pm

Rileys TavernTessy Lou & the Shotgun Stars

w/ 54 Specials

7pm

River Road Ice HouseJason Eady

8pm

Vineyard at GrueneShawn Hart

7pm

Sun 3.15


Kim & Her Bad Habits

2pm

Drug Store Cowboys

6pm

Phoenix SaloonAdam Johnson

3pm

Lucas Taylor

7pm

Geronimo VFW #8456Paul Sanchez & Wrangler Country

3pm

Gruene HallMilkdrive

12:30pm

Holy Moly

5pm

The Pour HausMyles Smith

8pm

Rileys TavernThe Georges

4pm

River Road Ice HouseCourtney Patton

2pm

Mon 3.16

Gruene HallBret Graham

6pm

The Pour HausMichael Kelton

8pm

River Road Ice HouseWalt Wilkins

6pm

Tues 3.17

Watering Hole SaloonChris Vetter

8:30pm

Bonzai Steak & SushiSmooth Jazz

w/ Sam Harriss

6pm

Comal Country Music ShowKC Hall

Carol Cochran, Gene Bartkiewitcz,

Sammy Dale

6pm

Gruene HallTwo Tons of Steel

8pm, $5

The Pour HausSt. Patricks Day Celebration

8pm

Wed 3.18

Phoenix Saloon

Swing Dance Night

8pm

Billys Ice HouseAaron Stephens

8pm

Gruene HallTom Gillam

6pm

The Pour HausBrent Michael Wood

8pm

Rileys TavernMike Ethan Messick

7pm

Vineyard at GrueneZack Walther

6pm

S O U N D C H E C K B R O U G H T T O Y O U B Y:

910 Gruene Rd. #3 830.387.4378

grueneroadpharmacy.com

/GrueneRoadPharmacy

We are proud to offer:Prescription Services, Compounding,

OTC Medication & Durable Medical EquipmentYou pay the same copay and get more value!

"Bringing personalized service back to pharmacy."

46

337

E CO

MMON

STH

ANZ

RD

GRUE

NE RD

/TXCitizen

STALK usGO AHEAD...

PRICKLY PEAR LOUNGE

THURS & SATBack from his gig in Hollywood:

Karaoke King, Johnny V!!

FRIDAYThe Amazing DJKC!!

SUNDAYHappy Hour Prices

Free Darts & Pool! TWO TABLES!

MONDAYNat'l Be Nice to Your Thirst Day!

TUESDAYSt Patrick's Day! Irish Car Bombs!

Music by The Irish Pretender

WEDNESDAYAnother Hump Day @ The Pear

Free Darts & Pool

THURSDAYKaraoke by Johnny V

Ribbon Cutting at 8 P.M.Hors D'ouvres (Horse Doovers)

KEEPIN' ITPRICKLY

SINCE1979

1051 N. IH-35 | Like us! In The Ramada 830-625-8017

10 AD SALES 830.358.2493

Fri 3.13

Cheatham Street Warehouse

Blue Healer

Canvas People

w/ Lucas Eason & Panhandler

9pm

The Continental Club

Club Lineup:

The Blues Specialists, 6:30pm

Walker Lukens

w/ T Bird & the Breaks

10pm, $10

Gallery Lineup:

Robert Kraft Trio, 8:30pm

Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

Floores Country Store

The Georges

7pm

Luckenbach Dance Hall

Hayden Whittington

1pm

T & C Miller

4pm

Thomas Michael Riley

8pm, $10

Sams Burger Joint

Band of Heathens

w/ Scott Davis

8pm, $10-$60

Stubbs BBQ

TBA

9pm, Inside

Sat 3.14

Cheatham Street Warehouse

Closed for Private Event

The Continental Club

Club Lineup:

Redd Volkaert, 3:30pm

Zakk & Big Papa Binns

w/ Cedell Davis

10pm, $10

Gallery Lineup:

Hillary York, 8:30pm

Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

Floores Country Store

Gary Allan

w/ Andrew Combs

7pm, 18+, $35-$40

Luckenbach Dance Hall

Weldon Henson

1pm

Reckless Kelly, Micky & the Motorcars,

Walt Wilkins & the Mystiqueros

8pm, $25

Sams Burger Joint

The Trishas

w/ Owen Temple

8pm, $15-$50

Stubbs BBQ

TBA

9pm, Inside

SOUND TOWNOUTOF

Special Events Monthly

Private Parties- Catering

Wedding Facilities AvailableNever a Cover!

Kid & Pet Friendly!

1263 Gruene Road 830.625.1045

Call for Hours!

omalovesyou.com

Special Events Monthly

Private Parties- Catering

Wedding Facilities AvailableNever a Cover!

Kid & Pet Friendly!

1263 Gruene Road 830.625.1045

Call for Hours!

omalovesyou.com

MARCH 12 @ 6 JAM NIGHT

MARCH 13 @ 6 THE EMPTY HANDED VAGABONDS

MARCH 14 @ 1 THE LESTI HUFF BAND @ 6 ADAM JOHNSON BAND

MARCH 15 @ 2 KIM AND HER BAD HABITS @ 6 DRUG STORE COWBOYS

MARCH 19 @ 6 JAM NIGHT

Upcoming Events:

BEST OF THE

WURST 2014

double winner!Best Beer Bar

& Best Bartenders

Freiheit Country Store

KaraokeFriday Nights, 8pm

Happy Cow

KaraokeThursdays Nights

Old Ice House

KaraokeThursdays, Sundays

DJWednesdays, Fridays, Saturdays

Phoenix Saloon

KaraokeThursday Nights

Prickly Pear Lounge

KaraokeThursdays, Saturdays

DJ KCFridays

The Watering Hole Saloon

KaraokeThursdays

DJFridays, Saturdays

diversions


I dreaded St. Patricks Day when I was in school. This is because, without fail, someone would pinch me if I wasnt wearing something green.

Evidently, not wearing green on St. Patricks Day justifies physical assault. This is tradition and, like many traditions, it has a lot to answer for. This also serves to prove that children are evil.

My pleadings to sadistic schoolmates that Im not Irish fell on deaf ears. On St. Patricks Day, it seems everyone is Irish. However, if you have read Angelas Ashes, you know that being Irish kinda sucks.

The history of Ireland is steeped in woe, full of death, famine, poverty and brutality. When the Irish migrated to the United States, they faced woe, death, famine, poverty and brutality. But, at least, it was somewhere else.

Because of the enormous influx of Irish, many of their traditions have interpolated into the rest of the American fabric. Because of this, every March 17, we find ourselves celebrating the:

Wearin O the Green (unless the Irishman is gay, then its Wearin O the Sparkly Lam)

Wearin O the Little Hat at a Whimsical Angle

Drinkin O the Green Beer (which would be disturbing out of context)

Hatin O the English BastardsWatchin O the ParadesPinchin O the Child Not Wearing Green.The day actually marks the death of St.

Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland. The belief is that St. Patrick chased the snakes from Ireland sometime in the fifth century. That there were never any snakes in Ireland is beside the point. History is full of stuff that never actually happened, such as dragons, Merlin and the Age of Reason. When this happens, historians look for metaphors and symbolism, a process by which researchers attempt to explain how something that didnt happen actually did.

In the case of St. Patrick, some historians have theorized that the snakes actually represented the last of the Druids, who used snakes as religious symbols. Of course, it could be because the Irish were eating mushrooms or drinking bad booze. This would also explain leprechauns, especially the breakfast food-obsessed kind.

Another claim attributed to St. Patrick is that he used the shamrock to explain the Holy Trinity, three different leaves but one plant. This is how the shamrock came to represent Hibernian Isle.

I guess this where the green thing comes in. The shamrock is green as is much of Ireland, which is known as the Emerald Isle. The reason the place is so green is because of the enormous amount of rain it gets, averaging about 65,000 inches per year. The other reason is because those who were slaughtered made good nutrients for the soil.

And, Lord, is Ireland steeped in death: ages of brutal tribal warfare, vicious English assaults, longstanding violence between Catholics and Protestants, the potato famine, and on and on and on. There has been so much death on the island that more Irish have died than have ever lived.

Yet, even with its history of despair, Ireland has produced a number of great artists.

There have been numerous wonderful Irish writers, many of who are famous for their witty quips, such as Oscar Wilde (Go #&*@ yourself); George Bernard Shaw (I will kill you! I will kill you all!); and James Joyce (Leave me alone).

Famous thespians include Richard Harris (brilliant but cantankerous); Peter OToole (brilliant but weird); and Maureen OHara (brilliant and hot).

Famous musicians include U2 (of course), Thin Lizzy and the Chieftans (if you havent listened to the Chieftans, do so. Im not kidding).

Of course there have been many Irish phrases that have entered into our American lexicon, such as top o the mornin; sure and begorra; kissin the Blarney Stone; kill the English bastards; and Ill light the Bat Signal, Commissioner.

And make no mistake, the Irish are a tough lot. The nations top sport is hurling, which is like field hockey except with psychopaths.

Unfortunately, the Irish propensity for drinking is not made up the nation has an alcoholism rate that makes Americans look sober. Of course, if you lived in Ireland you might resort to anything to stop the sad.

Nevertheless, like many cultures, the Irish have suffered and have caused others to suffer, but still they thrived, becoming as integral a part of American history as anyone.

With all that, then, I would like to wish my Irish friends a happy St. Patricks Day and I hope luck be with you.

I also must point out that I am not Irish and if you pinch me, Im will slug you.

On Occasionwith Ed Farbererwith Ed Farberer

9103 FM 1102San Braunfels (Hunter, TX)

512.667.7510happycowhuntertx.com

HAPPY COWB A R & G R I L L

ThursdayCow-E-Oke

FridayJordan Minor and

Bottom Dollar Band

SaturdayKayla Ray

TuesdayOpen Mic

WednesdayDavid Harris

1390 McQueeney Rd, New Braunfels830-625-0045 or wateringholesaloon.comLike us on FB Watering Hole Saloon & Dancehall

Est. 1986

Dust off your dancing shoes and head over to NBs largest dance floor.

FREE MarchDance LessonsCountry WaltzEvery Friday 7pm-8pmFollowed by Live Music

Sat: DJ Dance @ 9pmSun: Happy Hour ALL Day

Mon: FREE DARTSTues: LIVE MUSIC @ 7pm

Wed: LADIES NIGHTFree Pool & JukeboxThurs: KARAOKE


By Gustavo Arellano

Dear Mexican: So there I was, sitting

in Spanish class, like the good half-frog/

half wop (i.e., frop) that I am, when I

observe the Spanish teacher write the

word esposas up on the board. Imagine

my shock/horror when the teacher told

us esposas has two meanings: wives

and handcuffs! PLEASE TELL ME

THIS IS A COINCIDENCE!

Fropito from Laguna Hills

Dear Gabacho: On one hand, I can

point to Latinshow that esposas is the

feminine plural of esposo, which comes

from the Latin sponsus (same root word

for spouse), which comes from the Latin

spondere, which means to bind, and note

that thats exactly what handcuffs do. And

then I can carry the misogynistic theme and

mention that wrists in Spanish translates

as muecas, which also means dolls,

and that even the Real Academia Espaola

doesnt know the etymology of the word, or

why the two words mean the same thing.

And I can conclude by decrying machismo

in Mexicans, that its so ingrained in our

culture that its even infested etymology. On

the other hand, only a single guy would ever

ask why esposas simultaneously means

handcuffs and wives.

Dear Mexican: Just wondering

why do Mexicans love to eat ####?

You can walk down the street in any

Mexican city any day or night and

the smell of frying intestines and so

forth is overpowering. To anyone but

a Mexican, this is a repulsive smell

it literally repulses, meaning that it

calls up an instinct to get as far away

from such smells as possible. But

one sees such food-stands covered

in Mexicans, like flies on ####. What

gives here? Is ####, i.e., intestines,

really a good food? Or what? What am

I missing here?

The Only Living Fresa in Puebla York

Dear Pendejo: Youre talking trash on

tripas, which mankind has eaten in one form

or anothersausage, dinuguan, chitlins,

hamburger meat, and in tacossince your

ancestors were wiping the culos of Olmec

emperors. Fresas like you might sneer at tripas

as pauper food, just like the elites of society

all have through history, but whatever: thats

at least one thing ustedes will never gentrify.

Besides, you already took the real #### in our

society by embracing Man.

Dear Mexican: Im a gringa with

the star sign of Leo so I love cats, but I

also love Mexican men. But heres the

rub: every Mexican I meet seems to

be allergic to cats or just hates them. I

cant deal with it. Am I just picking the

wrong Mexicans or is there some kind

of aversion to four-legged furries in the

culture that Im not privy to?

Sad Cat-Loving White Girl

Dear Gabacha: While consumer

surveys show Mexicans do own cats (more

so than African-Americans or Asians, for

that matter), Mexicans will always prefer

dogs to gatos because we like their

companionship and barking abilities

think of them as our ADT Alarm system.

Besides, the only pussy Mexican men

worry about aint feline.

Ask the Mexican at [email protected],

be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano or follow him

on Instagram @gustavo_arellano!

ASK A MEXICAN!

!

MOST WANTED

$300REWARD

COMAL COUNTY S

MEDELLIN, JESSE RODRIGUEZMale 507 200 lbsDOB: 01/01/1976CHARGE: Possession of a controlled substance pg 1 under 1 gram and theft of property under $1500 with 2 or more previous convictions

DEIMEL, ANDREA MICHELLEFemale 504 145 lbsDOB: 11/02/1979CHARGE: Motion to proceed with adjudication for abandon endanger child

DELAFUENTE, RENE SALAZARMale 509 165 lbsDOB: 03/09/1970CHARGE: Failure to appear for driving while intoxicated w/child under 15 yoa and bail jumping and fail to appear

GILBERT,JIMMY LEEMale 505 145 lbsDOB: 12/19/1966CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for possession of controlled substance

BLAKE, CHRISTOPHER JHEROMEMale 511 210 lbsDOB: 09/11/1987CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for possession of a controlled substance and tamper/ fabricate physical evidence

HAMMOCK, JAMIE SUNSHINEFemale 503 120 lbs

DOB: 07/02/1971CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for

possession controlled substance

HARMER,NICHOLETTE

Female 504 110 lbsDOB: 12/27/1982CHARGE: Driving

while intoxicated 3rd or more

LEWIS, LYLE RAYMale 511 185 lbs

DOB: 08/31/1985CHARGE: Failure to appear for fraud and

theft property over $1500 under $20k

and bail jumping and fail to appear

MECKEL,LINDA GAYE

Female 505 160 lbsDOB: 11/27/1963

CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for

possession controlled substance

HARRIS, RYAN WAYNE

Male 508 230 lbsDOB: 12/23/1982

CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for

burglary of habitation

The names listed have been released in accordance with the Texas Public Information Act. This is a true and accurate account as of Monday, March 9, 2015 at 10:30 AM and may not be current by the time it is read. Do not try to apprehend anyone. These are listings of criminal warrants with the Comal County Sheriff s Office and are not indicative of guilt or innocence. Officers are to verify the status of each warrant prior to making an arrest. Any person is innocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.

FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARREST OF COMAL COUNTYS MOST WANTED. Callers will remain anonymous. 830.620.3400 - 24-Hour830.620.3411 - Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm

BEVERLY,NATHANIEL DAN JRMale 505 150 lbsDOB: 04/02/1991CHARGE: Failure to appear engage in organized criminal activity- forgery and forgery financial instrument

ARRESTED

TXCITIZEN.COM 13

Executive Ofce Space Available!

Starting at $350/mo.includes utilities,

use of reception area& conference rooms!

N. Walnut Ave

Howard S

t.

Landa St.Wo

od Rd

.

Call or stop by!830-620-7653

1111 N Walnut Ave 2 3 4 8 G ru e ne L a ke D r. S u i t e B in the Vi l lage 8 3 0 . 64 3 . 13 09

Single Origin Espresso & Brews Handcrafted BlendsHandcrafted Blends

Whole Bean Coffee PastriesPastriessmoothies, teas, & iced coffees

Free -FiFree -FiFree -Fi

Weekdays6:30 - 6:30pm

Weekends7:30 - 6:30pm

830.625.2420 1617 BUSINESS 35 S.

[email protected]

GUADA COMA

GUADA COMA

$85 Heating System Inspection Special!

Dont let the cold catch you!Dont let the cold catch you!

830.620.5376262 W Jahn Street facebook.com/Conwaysdancehall



Patio - Bar - Game Room - Sports BarPatio - Bar - Game Room - Sports Bar

St. Patricks Day Party!Tuesday, March 17 Doors open at 4pm!

Green Beer LeprechaunsCrawfish Boil Beads Bud Girls!



14 TX CITIZEN 14 AD SALES 830.358.2493 TXCITIZEN.COM 15

More on Net NeutralityThis weeks column begins with a letter from TX Citizen reader Paul Heussner:

As a network engineer in New Braunfels, I must say your article on Net Neutrality was awfully misinformed. The Internet deserves more respect than that. I know its easy to get lost in the techno-speak, so let me break this down in human terms.

Remember that scandal when Enron shut down power plants, because they could charge more money by creating shortages, and then blame the shortages for their price gouging?

ISPs have been caught in a similar scandal, by creating shortages in your Internet. Every time your Netflix has to stop and buffer, youve been a victim of an artificial Internet shortage. Seriously, this should all be working by now.

Remember: technology doubles every year or so. Thanks to that, you have a supercomputer in your pocket. So why is the Internet so slow? It should be super-fast for everyone by now. Someone is holding it backfor money.

You know who doesnt like net neutrality? The people who make Unlimited Data

Plans that are really Limited to 4GB Per Month Data Plans. Wireless ISPs were caught red handed. This is bull#### market innovation and people hate them.

The people who make Netflix load #####, so they have a competitive edge for their own video-on-demand service. Cable ISPs were caught red handed. This is bull#### market innovation and people hate them.

The people who inject extra ads in your webpages. Extra ads that werent originally on the webpage. ISPs were caught red handed. This is bull#### market innovation and people hate them.

The people who make equipment that slows down the internet unless you pay their ransom money. ISPs were caught red handed. This is bull#### market innovation and people hate them.

You know who likes net neutrality? The people who make apps, games,

videos and blogs on the internet. This is quality innovation and people love them.

The people who make Netflix. This is quality innovation and people love them.

The people who make cool stuff for the web. This is quality innovation and people love it.

The people who care about the Internet working best for the community, and not just for shareholder profit.

Just who are you siding with? Scandalous big businesses who were caught red handed? Please think about how youre being played by clever libertarian-flavored corporate propaganda.

Best Regards, Paul

I think this is the first time Ive responded directly to an email in the TX Citizen. Pauls letter above, though, offers some specific criticisms and a format that is easy to follow and address. Furthermore, when I contacted Paul to ask for some clarification, he was quick to offer some links (available in the online version of this column at txcitizen.com after 3/13) that I could use to be sure I understood his point correctly. Having all this at hand, I cant see any reason not to give a direct reply in print.

The thrust of Pauls email is that I am misinformed and have perhaps been misled by corporate propaganda. This last phrase and some of the other language used in the email already has me suspecting that Pauls ideological beliefs are getting in the way of his critical thinking skills, but lets save that for later and begin with Pauls supremely helpful bullet points of complaints. I assume this is the source of his belief that I am misinformed. It wasnt my main assertion, but I did say that the FCC was solving a problem that was already solved.

With the exception of the final bullet point, which Paul didnt offer support for, the examples Paul offers have been solved. Netflix had been negotiating for more direct access to ISP customers where their service was being throttled, People have been leaving their unlimited data plans for plans that include caps to avoid throttling, and the ads in question were first admitted to and then dropped. Perhaps these were not solutions that Paul liked, but they are solutions, and none of what Paul accused companies of being caught red-handed with was illegal. Its worth noting that the FCC is not a court in any real sense of the word, they are a political and partisan bureaucracy, in this case looking for an excuse to create Net Neutrality through regulation as opposed to legislation.

As I suggested in last weeks column, free-market solutions are probably the best solutions. This is because they offer everyone actual freedom of choice. Much of what was done by cable providers, wireless services and ISPs

might have been irritating to consumers of their services, but those consumers have the ultimate power: they can decide to opt out of the service. The businesses involved really do need to focus on shareholder profit; its their job. The customer may always be right in theory, but in practice, a business needs to turn a profit to survive. That can sometimes be a balancing act.

Additionally, I said before and I will say again that we have gone through this process before. Paul points out Moores Law with regards to the doubling of computing power (really the number of transistors that can be placed in a square inch and more an observation than an actual law), and Ive been around for a good amount of this doubling, being old as I am. This idea of charging for bandwidth or data usage has come and gone more than once. In general, businesses like to charge for usage like they are offering a product because they know that ultimately more usage means more resources, and that means more overhead. Conversely, consumers generally prefer unlimited bandwidth or data usage because it offers more flexibility and they dont have to monitor their use. Companies believe, because of technological advancements, that they can offer more bandwidth or data than anyone could ever use and use unlimited plans as a selling point. Consumers rapidly find ways to use all that Moores Law has made possible and more, making companies sorry they ever left charging by usage. This continues to sway back and forth over time.

The reality of the FCC injecting itself into the process is that the free market will be skewed. One of the unintended results of this Net Neutrality decision will be a slowing of the internet overall. Though this may be hard to gauge in an environment that is continually accelerating, its easy enough to explain and understand logically. By forcing all traffic to be treated the same and charged the same rates, the FCC has significantly reduced the incentive for increasing speed and capacity. After all, providers wont be able to charge any more for it. It may still offer a competitive advantage for gaining and keeping customers, but this will need

to be offset, by possible loss in profit margin.This is actually the least of the problems

I see with Net Neutrality, and the larger problem ties in nicely with the underlying implication on Pauls email. His tone and word choice suggest that he thinks I am somehow a corporatist or someone who is duped by them.

While I respect the value of corporations, Im hardly a corporatist. Many corporations will likely be part of the Net Neutrality problem, and Netflix is arguably using what is being implemented as a form of regulatory capture, where their corporate interests are made a priority in regulation meant to be even-handed. As an anarcho-capitalist, I could be called anti-government, but that doesnt make me pro-corporation so much as pro-free market. Ultimately, Im pro-freedom, and the only one using actual force here is the FCC.

The internet is a relatively unique innovation in human experience. Paul points out, quite rightly, that there are a good number of people who work without concern for profit to improve the internet for everyone. Im sure he would also be quick to point out that the government has had a hand in creating the internet: both in the area of research and in its infrastructure. All this is true, but the internet would not be anything more than a toy without the free market. Pauls disdain for market innovations that are thinly veiled attempts at profit maximization is misplaced. This is the reason Paul has an internet to email me on. Neither our government, nor all the governments of the world would ever have been able to make the type of investment in the internet that has been made by the free market. And theres no question that the product would have been vastly inferior if they had.

In the end, the argument Im making is for freedom. I want the internet to remain a place where free-market principles, not the government, rules. As a resource, the internet is best allocated using capitalistic principles because capitalism allows for the greatest utility of those resources (this is perhaps an argument that deserves its own column). It seems that Paul believes the government will allocate those resources more fairly. I suspect that Paul is looking for a system that prioritizes need over profit, but Im afraid the government is just as bad at determining need as it is at everything else it does. I dont think Paul is a bad person (perhaps misinformed), but I do think he will be disappointed with what comes of Net Neutrality. As for which of us is right, I leave that to the readers to decide.

Last WordWith Kelly Colby

You can read more from Kelly Colby at yourfirstshrug.blogspot.com.

TXCITIZEN.COM 15

You can read more from Kelly Colby at yourfirstshrug.blogspot.com.

THIS IS YOUR SAMPLE BALLOT Tear it out, take it with you!

Best Classic CheeseburgerHappy CowPhoenix SaloonSpud RanchLone Star Float HousePats PlaceUnion Street StationLanda StationBosses PizzaFreiheit Country StoreIron HorseOld River City Cafe

Best Grilled Cheese SandwichPats PlaceFork and SpoonGourmage of TexasCravingsLanda StationUnion Street StationOld River City Cafe

Best Classic Cheese EnchiladasAdobe VerdeTaco PalenqueEl NopolitoLas PalapasSan Juanita's TaqueriaTaqueria El Sazon TapatioAdobe CafHannas KitchenMarinas Mexican CantinaEl TapatioNB TortillariaCancun Mexican RestaurantTaqueria GuadalajaraHerberts Taco HutEl TamarindoLos Gallos

Best Indie Classic Cheese PizzaBossesCalahansNew York Pizza PubFigliosInfernosDis HomemadeHwy 46 Pizza

Best Cheese-Based PastryKora Koras Bacon Cheddar RollNaegelins Cheese PocketNB Coee Companys Cheese Danish

Beyond the Cheese: Best Coffeefor the Hardcore Java-HeadKora Kora CoeeNB Coee CoGruene Coee HouseCrosswalk Coee

Beyond the Cheese: Best BaristasKora Kora CoeeCrosswalk Cafe - WestpointeCrosswalk Cafe - PlazaNB Coee CoGruene Coee House2 Rivers Coee

Beyond the Cheese: Best Meatball SubFiglios PizzaOlives Italian MarketNew York Pizza PubBlue Moose Pizza

Best Place to Trigger Insulin SpikeSweet Dreams BakeryGourmet Ice CoBabycake TruesNaegelins BakeryGourmage of Texas2 TartsNew City BakeryDonut Palace

Beyond the Cheese: Best Local Treat Too Good to Waste on KidsSweet Dreams Elvis CupcakeGourmet Ices Dreamsicle Shaved IceBabycake Trues Pink ChampagneGourmages Root Beer MarshmallowNaegelins Maple Bacon Bar

Beyond the Cheese: Best SnackageAdobe Verdes Frog DipOma Gruenes German NachosPhoenix Saloons Frito-PieScores Fried PicklesHappy Cows Baloney SandwichCBQs Evil Disco Death Metal FriesBualo Wings and Rings Saratoga Chips

Beyond the Cheese: Best Indie BrisketGranzinsSchwabs BBQCBQ SmokehouseMcBees BBQ

Beyond the Cheese: Best Corporate BrisketRudys BBQCoopers BBQBill Miller BBQ

Beyond the Cheese: Best Indie Breakfast TacosSan Juanita's TaqueriaTaqueria El Sazon TapatioHannas KitchenMarinas Mexican CantinaEl TapatioJohnny Macs Truck WashNB TortillariaCancun Mexican RestaurantTaqueria GuadalajaraEl TamarindoLos Gallos

Beyond the Cheese: Best Small Chain Breakfast TacosTaco PalenqueEl NopalitoLas Palapas

Fire Water: Best Full-On Texas Style BarThe Watering Hole SaloonPhoenix SaloonConways Dance HallOld Ice HouseHappy CowBillys Ice HouseRileys TavernHoity Toit Beer Joint

Fire Water: Best Sports BarPrickly Pear LoungeScores Sports Bar and GrillBlack WhaleThe Watering Hole SaloonRiver City Range BarBualo Wings and Rings

Fire Water: Best Pub Style BarOyster BarBlack & Tan PubFaust Brewing CoAJs Ale HouseCalahans

Fire Water: Best Wine BarLongshot Wine BarVino en VerdeWater 2 WineWolfgangs KellerVineyard at GrueneWinery in the GrueneKork

Fire Water: Best Patio/Deck/Backyard BarOma Gruenes Secret GartenKoozies Ice HousePour HausBubbas Big DeckPateks Craft Beer and Wine Bar

Fire Water: Best Dang MargaritaAdobe Verdes Dos RitaWatering Holes MargaritaPhoenix Saloons MargaritaScores MargaritasPrickly Pears MargaritaBlack Whales Margarita

Boot Scootin: Best Place to Get Your Two-Step OnConways Dance HallWatering Hole SaloonGruene Hall

Civics: Best Place to Plan White-Collar CrimeHonors HallCouncil Chamber BFairway 11, Landa Park Golf CourseWursthalle

Civics: Coolest City-Owned VehicleNBFDs Ladder TruckNBPDs TankStreet Departments Grapple Truck

Perform your due diligence before voting. Eat those pizzas. Sample those margaritas. Soak in the Texas mojo. Then stagger to your computer and vote at txcitizen.ROCKS. The survey ends on April 9, with results printed in our April 16 edition.

EAT - DRINK - VOTE Full Ballot at txcitizen.ROCKS

Jahr der Kse(Year of the Cheese)

$10 Offyour swimsuit purchase!

$10 Offyour swimsuit purchase!

173 S. Seguin St 830.214.0728

Half-Off One Entreewith purchase of another entree and two drinks.

One coupon per table. Cannot be combined with any other offer. Expires 03/31/15

Huge Play Area for the Kids Live Music Thursday-SundayHappy Hour Monday-Friday 3:00-6:30pm

830.629.0777 1724 Hunter Road, New BraunfelsTEX-MEX COCINA Y CANTINA

BEST OF THE

WURST 2014winner!

Best Signature Cocktail Dos Rita(830) 822-6315

comalspringsca.com

A $30 Value. New Patients Only. Cannot Be Combined

BRING IN THIS AD AND YOUR FIRST TREATMENT IS

With Other Offers. Offer Expires March 31, 2015

210.421.2344scottpwalkerphotographer.com

P H O T O G R A P H E R

Real Estate Introductory Special

$100 per shootUp to 50 edited photos delivered

to you! Fast turnaround!

Real Estate Introductory Special

$100 per shootUp to 50 edited photos delivered

to you! Fast turnaround!

DLeeEdwardsRealty.com 1111 N. Walnut Ave. New Braunfels, TX 78130Call our AWARD WINNING TEAM! 830.620.7653

Clean MachinesCarpet Cleaning

Clean Machines

Any 3 Rooms$69

Call Garrett Matochaat 830.660.4772

Call Garrett Matochaat 830.660.4772

Carpet Cleaning HELP WANTEDPRICKLY PEAR LOUNGE Bartender and Cocktail Server

Apply in Person or Call 830-625-8017Ask for Haley

RAMADA INN Hotel Front Desk Agent

Night AuditorApply in Person or Call

830-625-8017Ask for Dan

tx citizen 3.12.15

Documents