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Parenting Your teenParenting Your teenParenting Your Parenting Your teen
Learning to Love YourseLfMiss America 2008, Kirsten Haglund, speaks out on beating her eating disorder with the help of her parents
Learning to 3
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AN iNdepeNdeNt SUppLeMeNt by MediApLANet tO chicAgO tribUNe
teen travelOpportunities for your child at home and abroad
Ask a dermatologistActions teenagers can take for clear skin
New driver in the family? put down the phone and focus on the road
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February 2011
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CHaLLengeS
Jennifer smith fights distracted drivers
We recommend
pAge 6
Parenting Your teen1st edition, FebruarY 2011
Managing Director: geraldine [email protected] Manager: Jackie [email protected]
responsible for this issue:publisher: amy [email protected] Developer: brandon [email protected]: missy [email protected]: angela Patterson, brad roeber, carolyn costin, Jennifer smith, Ken lin, Kirsten haglund, national eating disorders association, stephen Wallace, dr. steven Prinz, students against destructive decisions
Distributed within: chicago tribune, February 2011this section was created by mediaplanet and did not involve the chicago tribune or its editorial departments.
Mediaplanet’s business is to create new customers for our advertisers by providing readers with high-quality editorial content that motivates them to act.
Adults and young people who take the time to talk with, and listen to, their children and friends are critical catalysts of healthy lifestyles and positive choices.
Keeping our teens safe
Young people need their par-ents more than ever! That is both because of the enormous physical, social,
and emotional changes that take place during adolescence and because the nature of the world in which our kids live has been radically transformed over the past decade. This is not our grand-father’s adolescence, or even our own!
Of the many challenges before us, none is more urgent than keep-ing our kids safe and alive. One need only read the morning paper or watch an evening broadcast to fully appreciate the many difficult decisions about personal behav-ior teens must make every day. While the answers of how best to help them often seem elusive, our research and work at SADD (Students Against Destructive Decisions) continues to provide meaningful direction to all those who care about young people.
identify key ‘decision points’For example, through our Teens Today research we have uncovered trends in adolescent decision-making that suggest significant spikes in destructive, or potentially destructive, behaviors at differ-ent stages of development. Why is this important? Because it offers us a road map that flags some of the dangerous intersections on the way to adulthood and plots some detours around them, identify-ing key “decision points” as kids mature and the factors (includ-ing mental states, personal goals, potential outcomes and signifi-cant people) that influence their choices. Just as important, it offers time-targeted strategies to provide assistance and support, including guides for engaging our children in critical conversations about choices, personal responsibility, and commitment to family and friends.
Find answers and alternativesSADD has long been committed to the principle that young people,
helping each other, are the key to promoting good decision-making. Concerned students across the country have challenged commu-nities to help them find answers, and alternatives, to destructive behaviors. Their work is the cor-nerstone of enormously effective peer-to-peer education and pre-vention programs nationwide and is celebrated in the lives of hun-dreds of thousands of teens, past and present, who otherwise may have taken a different, more dan-gerous path to adulthood.
Not surprisingly, all of our research offers news both bad and good: confirmation that young people have easy access to alcohol, drugs, and sex, and con-solation that parents and peers can effectively promote good decision-making. And that is truly the last, best line of defense for teens in today’s world. Adults and young people who take the time to talk with, and listen to, their children and friends are critical catalysts of healthy life-styles and positive choices.
stephen Gray Wallace, M.s. Ed.National chairman and chief executive Officer, SAdd, inc.
treating teen acne p. 5healthy skin tips for your teen.
“... though our teens today research we have uncovered trends in adolescent decision-making that suggest significant spikes in destructive, or potentially destructive, behaviors at different stages of development.”
tEACH tEEns GooD DECision MAKinG sKills
tEACH tEEns
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inSigHt
Naperville Plainfield
Arabella Housel Visit www.edward.org/eatingdisorders for more information about Arabella House and the comprehensive eating disorder program offered at Linden Oaks at Edward.
Nestled in the heart of Naperville, Illinois, Arabella House offers residential carefor female adolescents and adults ages 16 and older who are recovering from aneating disorder and need assistance shifting back into their daily lives.
Question: What can you do to help a friend or family member struggling with an eating disorder?Answer: Encourage them by offering support, and connect them to resources.
My battle with anorexia
Human stories are powerful; they encourage, inspire, and give hope. I found this to be true as I traveled the
country, sharing my own battle with anorexia, as Miss America 2008. While I saw the impact the story of my family’s triumph over an eating disorder gave to those that I interacted with, what was most humbling were the sto-ries that I heard: mothers whose daughters had died of bulimia after a night of bingeing. Fathers who watched their daughters’
anorexia stop their heart at the age of 21. I also heard stories, like mine, of hope.
setting an unachievable goalI began to ‘diet’ at the age of 12. I had always been the ‘good kid’, did well in school, and was a perfectionist. I held my body to an ideal that was thinner than, and unachievable for, 98 percent of the population. When I reached puberty, fear of weight gain coupled with the desire to please instructors and do well in bal-let, lead me to set out to control my weight, at any cost. What began as a desire to lose five pounds turned into an obsession with calorie intake, weight, and a plummeting self-image. My anorexic physical state lead to the deterioration of my mind, mood, relationships with others, and destroyed my sense of identity. I was my eating disorder—it was what made me thin, pretty, successful, and in control.
At age 15, my parents stepped in to help me into treatment. I was in complete denial of a problem, and terrified of any ‘help’ that would simply seek to make me ‘fat.’ This response is common among adoles-cents. It was the support of my fam-
ily that helped me to gain the confi-dence to leap off the side of the cliff in faith that treatment would work. My parents helped with food at home as I worked with the nutritionist to stay on a meal plan that would restore my body and mind to balance. I leaned heavily on my family’s support in the decision to leave the ballet world and discover new talents, new areas where I could succeed—where suc-cess was based on character, skill, and merit, and not appearance.
Five years later, I feel free from the thinking patterns that trapped me in my eating disorder. I fight with the tools I learned in therapy to cope with stress and high expectations in healthy ways. My mother and I work as a team to fundraise and provide treatment scholarships for those struggling with eating disor-ders through my organization, the Kirsten Haglund Foundation. We seek to connect families to resources, and stand by them as they seek care and companionship in the struggle. We can take steps to prevent eating disorders, so one more little girl does not have to die because she was not ‘good enough.’ With treatment and support, recovery is possible. Hope is alive for our young men and women.
FAMily supportKirsten and her mother.Photo: Kathleen lantos
“i was in complete denial of a problem, and terrified of any ‘help’ that would simply seek to make me ‘fat.’”
Kirsten HaglundMiss America 2008
While the incidence of eating disor-ders in the U.S. has been on the rise these past few decades, a positive development has finally emerged to halt this growth and offer unprecedented hope to affected families: According to a recent sur-vey conducted by public opinion research firm American Viewpoint, the stigma of eating disorders has reversed itself.
The study found that 95 percent of respondents would now seek help or encourage a person they suspect has an eating disorder to seek help. This represents a dramatic shift in the national perception of eating disor-ders, which include anorexia, bulimia, and binge-eating disorder. Families are finally feeling empowered to con-front this illness and seek treatment.
Lynn Grefe, CEO of the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA), recognized the critical importance of removing the stigma associated with eating disorders, which is why she made it central to her mission when she became head of the world’s largest and longest standing eating disorders prevention and advocacy organiza-tion in 2003. Grefe recalls, “When people knew, they didn’t want to tell anybody…it was kept secret. So I wanted people to understand that they didn’t do anything wrong and needed to focus on getting better.”
From Feb. 20-26, NEDA will be host-ing National Eating Disorders Week at organized events throughout the country that all embody the effort’s message “It’s Time to Talk About It.” Read more at www.nationaleating-disorders.org.
Confronting eating disorders and moving on
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KEEp linEs oF CoMMuniCAtion
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red flags for spotting teen eating disordersCombine a teenager’s focus on appearance with society’s war on obesity and it is easy to see why dieting is common among teens.
Dieting can be harmless but all too often a diet turns to a disorder and may even become life threatening.
Carolyn Costin, eating dis-order specialist and author of your “Dieting Daughter, 100 Questions and Answers About Eating Disorders” and “The Eating Disorder Sourcebook” provides these following tips to
watch out for:■■ Preoccupation with weight
and weighing■■ Elimination of eating certain
foods and types of foods■■ Weight, loss in a short period
of time, and fear of weight gain■■ Does not fully acknowledge
weight loss■■ Hiding food, eating in private,
food disappearing■■ Signs of purging (i.e. bath-
room immediately after meals■■ Excessive exercise (can-
not skip exercise, lies about amount).
CArolyn Costin, MED, lMFt, CEDsFounder and executive director
Monte Nido & [email protected]
Carolyn Costin
My battle with anorexiaily that helped me to gain the confi-dence to leap off the side of the cliff in faith that treatment would work. My parents helped with food at home as I worked with the nutritionist to stay on a meal plan that would restore my body and mind to balance. I leaned heavily on my family’s support in the decision to leave the ballet world and discover new talents, new areas where I could succeed—where suc-cess was based on character, skill, and merit, and not appearance.
Five years later, I feel free from the thinking patterns that trapped me in my eating disorder. I fight with the tools I learned in therapy to cope with stress and high expectations in healthy ways. My mother and I work as a team to fundraise and provide treatment scholarships for those struggling with eating disor-ders through my organization, the Kirsten Haglund Foundation. We seek to connect families to resources, and stand by them as they seek care and companionship in the struggle. We can take steps to prevent eating disorders, so one more little girl does not have to die because she was not ‘good enough.’ With treatment and support, recovery is possible. Hope is alive for our young men and women.
Despite the rigor of the curriculum or the diversity of extracurricular activities, high school environments can often feel like insular bubbles for students that limit them from truly engag-ing with the outside world.
As colleges are increasingly expect-ing applicants to display an aware-ness and sense of activism regarding the world around them, summer programs are now offering the opportunity to do exactly that. Hav-ing pioneered this type of summer education platform almost three decades ago, ASA Summerfuel (Aca-demic Study Associates) now offers summer programs both domesti-cally at university campuses, such as Yale and Stanford, as well as locations abroad, such as Oxford and France.
In the domestic programs, students can learn to become leaders of civic engagement where thoughtful dia-logue is inspired both in and out of the classroom.
Other programs are offered at locations abroad, which enable students to either live with native families in homestay programs or community-oriented dormitory settings. According to Anne Fenton, who currently directs the ASA Sum-merfuel program in Nice and coor-dinates the language and cultural immersion programs from the ASA Summerfuel office in New York, the programs offered abroad ultimately aim to “create an authentic expe-rience that fosters independence and stimulates a global perspective through classes that are relevant to local culture, trips to notable des-tinations, and full immersion in a
given culture.” The opportunity to engage with
foreign cultures and landscapes is not merely an academic undertak-ing, but also an adventure. Discov-ery Student Adventures embraces this philosophy by escorting young aspiring scientists to the most remote regions of the world, ranging from the Galapagos to the Arctic to a myriad of exotic locations. According to Joel Hirschey, a high school Biol-ogy teacher who recently accompa-nied a team of students to the Costa Rican rainforest, “the program offers students an opportunity to get out of the classroom and into the field, where they can work side by side with researchers and scientists —it’s a real eye-opener for them.”
Max Friend
What are the biggest misconceptions regarding teenage acne?■ That acne is strictly diet-related, which is essentially not true. It depends on how the individual person reacts to spe-cific foods, as well as to a range of potential trigger factors, including stress, cosmetics, etc. Another common misconcep-tion is that acne is related to poor hygiene, which can lead to parents instructing their children to wash their faces too frequently, causing further irri-tation of the skin. Underlying it all, the severity of acne is geneti-cally determined.
What actions can teenag-ers take to treat acne?■ Wash your face with a mild cleanser and avoid picking, squeezing, or scratching pim-ples. Both benzoyl peroxide and salicylic acid are available through a range of over-the-counter products, and prescrip-tion medications offer enhanced efficacy with less irritation. Ulti-mately, a successful treatment plan can be tailored for each individual.
Dr. BEnJAMin DuBinpast president of the chicago
dermatological Society and board-certified dermatologist
Programs offer global interactionQuestion & ansWer:treating Your teen’s acne
Did you know?■ Eating Disorders have the highest mortality rate of any men-tal illness. Deadly complications include cardiac problems, dehydra-tion and low blood pressure. Long term damage can include a loss of bone mass, cognitive impair-ment, dental decay, loss of muscle
mass and many gastrointestinal complications.
don’t miss
Dr. steven prinzmedical director of eating disorder and anxiety services, linden oaks at edward
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losing someone you love because of a cell phone call or a text message is incom-prehensible. yet each year, thousands of families are faced with that tragedy.
Husbands, wives, parents, friends and children are being taken from the families who love them because drivers are putting their need to stay connected before the safety of others. I know because my family was torn apart when a driver using his cell phone killed my mom.
People need to understand the powers of the distraction of cell phone use while driving. This issue is not just about texting. Conversa-tions on hands-free and handheld devices distract the brain, and it can cause drivers to miss up to 50 per-cent of their driving environment as was the case with my mom. The driver who killed her said he never saw the red light, and the absence of skid marks indicate he never tried to stop.
Today, I am the president and founding board member of Focus-Driven—Advocates for Cell-Free Driving. Sadly, I meet families like mine every day who want to turn back time and keep their loved ones safe. About 23 percent of motor vehicle crashes involve cell phone use while driving, according to the National Safety Council. An esti-mated 21 percent of those involve cell phone use. The other two percent are crashes that involve drivers who are texting. We know texting is dangerous, but it’s the conversations on our hands-free and handheld devices that are causing more crashes.
It’s no longer a matter of if you are going to lose someone you know or love because of a phone conversa-tion or a text message, it’s when.
inSigHt
Question 1:What are common mistakes made by teens behind the wheel?
Question 2:What advice would you give teens and new drivers to be safer on the road?
Angela pattersoncommunity and corporate relations, bridgestone americas
Ken lin director, Product management, subaru of america
Brad roeberregional President,aaa chicago
Drive defensively. Try to anticipate what other drivers will do and be ready. This takes time and practice. Slow down on the roadways speeding is a problem amongst teens, which can lead to tickets, revoked licenses and worse. Driving, especially with little experience, takes one’s full attention, so cut down on distractions including other pas-sengers and texting. Finally, think of others. In the majority of crashes with teens at the wheel, someone else besides the teen driver was injured or killed.
the steps new drivers can take to stay safe on the road can be done before they even turn on the car—put the phone away, give the food and drinks to a passenger, and keep their eyes on the road. By eliminating distractions and focusing on driving, they’re making the roads safer for everyone.
First, pick a Insurance Institute for Highway Safety (IIHS) Top Safety Pick. All-wheel drive mod-els, such as those from Subaru, tend to cope best with slick conditions. Plan your route in advance to increase awareness of tricky situations. Finally, get enough rest before driving. If you haven’t slept for 18 hours, driving performance will be similar to driving with a blood-alcohol level of .08—a significant factor that people often overlook before driving.
the statistics are clear—car crashes are the leading cause of death for teens. Teens should buckle up—every trip wherever they’re seated in the car. Teens also need to recognize their inexperi-ence; driving takes practice—and one’s full atten-tion. Distractions, especially phones, hinder safe driving. Finally, teens erroneously think their driv-ing skills are better than they are. Driving is simi-lar to other aspects in teens’ lives, be it academics or extracurriculars—it takes time and practice to hone good driving skills.
Many of the mistakes made by teens are often a result of distractions. In an attempt to impress friends,teens might speed or drive reck-lessly. By taking their eyes off the road to answer a phone call or text, one could easily run a stop sign, a traffic light, or veer into oncoming traffic. When you couple mistakes made due to distractions with inexperience behind the wheel, it can be a deadly combination for teens.
the most common mistake by teens is driv-ing while distracted. Using cell phones and text messaging are the most obvious examples, but also eating—and spilling—food is one of the oldest recognized driver distractions for any age group. Likewise, grooming, such as applying makeup and combing hair, are always best not done in a moving vehicle. Similarly, adjusting audio, mirrors, seats, and temperature can only be done safely when the vehicle is stopped.
As children of all ages have seamlessly integrated tech-nology into their on-the-go lives by carrying their cell phones, mp3 players, and laptops with them, every en-vironment within which they find themselves now repre-sents a playground of tech-nological distraction.
While responding to a text or phone call may usually serve as little more than an irritating obstacle for par-ents struggling for their children’s attention, there is one situation when such distractions can prove fatal: when a teenager is behind the wheel. This past summer, the Pew Research Center’s Internet and American Life Project found that one in four (26 percent) of American teens of driving age say they have texted while driving, and half (48 percent) of all teens ages 12 to 17 say they’ve been a passenger while a
driver has texted behind the wheel. To reduce the risk of distracted
driving without sacrificing the ben-efits of a mobile phone, parents can now install software on the phone that sends text messages or calls directly to voicemail when the teen-ager is driving. Location Labs, a lead-ing provider of mobile location-as-a-service applications and one of Inc. Magazine’s 2010 list of America’s 500 Fastest Growing Private Companies, recently pioneered this “DriveSmart Plus” service with T-Mobile, which can be activated for a minimal fee of $4.99 per month.Location Labs’ software provides the most accurate geolocation technology by utilizing either GPS or triangulation when necessary, so that the mobile phone can detect that the teenager is driv-ing by sensing the movement of the car and automatically begin sending all incoming texts and calls to voice-mail.
Rather than only addressing the
potential dangers of cell phone use, Location Labs has also leveraged the inherent value of mobile phones to enable parents to keep better track of their children. Through AT&T FamilyMap, Sprint Family Locator, and TMobile Family FamilyWhere, Location Labs now enables parents to see the location of their children on their own phones by tracking the GPS/triangulation position of their children’s cell phones. According to Joel Grossman, SVP of marketing and product management at Loca-tion Labs, “The mobile phone is, at its core, a safety device… it’s why people buy phones for their loved ones.” Now we are more able than ever to safely use these devices to stay con-nected with the important people in our lives, rather than be distracted.
Max Friend
Straight to your voicemailJennifer smith President,Focus driven
understanding the PoWer oF distraction
put DoWn tHE pHonEput DoWoWo n tHE pHonE
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