the modern parenting techniques screwing kids up _ parent exchange

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October 26, 2013

The modern parenting techniques screwing kids up

Members on Reddit are naming and shaming the modern parenting practices messing up a

generation. Daniel Strudwick investigates the most common responses and asks: What common

parenting technique do you think screws kids up?

This column originally appeared on news.com.au (http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/reddit-slams-

the-modern-parenting-techniques-screwing-kids-up/story-fnet08ui-1226744457728). By Daniel Strudwick.

If you suck at adulthood, it must be pretty tempting to blame your parents.

Even though they probably nurtured you lovingly through childhood, picked you up after every fall andhesitantly let you go into the big, bad adult world, they mustve done something to screw you up, right?

Thats what reddit reckons (http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/reddit-slams-the-modern-parenting-

techniques-screwing-kids-up/story-fnet08ui-1226744457728). In one of the sites most popular threads

(http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1owcj9/what_common_parenting_technique_do_you_think/)

at the moment, redditors are naming and shaming the modern parenting practices messing up a generation.

Any of these sound familiar?

What common parenting technique do you think screws kids up?

Daniel Strudwick is Lifestyle Reporter

for news.com.au. Follow Daniel on

Twitter: @danielstrudwick

(https://twitter.com/danielstrudwick)

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1 -Making threats without following through. DextersLittleHelper

2 -Counting backwards from five means nothing if you get to one without consequences.

DextersLittleHelper

3 -Blindly defending their actions before even considering that Little Johnny may have, just this once,

been a little brat when mum wasnt watching. kernunnos77

4 -Helicopter parenting. How do you expect your kid to thrive in the real world if you make all the

decisions for him or her? zackhankins74

5 -Praising a childs intelligence is counterproductive and ultimately makes them dumber. However,

praising the process of problem solving makes a child smarter. -moose-

6 -Not paying enough attention to the kids, or only paying attention to them when they are doing

something wrong. Catching kids being bad is important so you can correct them. But if they are not

causing too much trouble, it can often be better to let them make their mistakes so they learn from

them. What is even more important than catching them being bad is to catch them being good. If they

get attention and positive reinforcement whenever they are doing right, they learn to do good all the

time. ThereisnoTruth

7 -Giving them whatever they want. MrsJohnnyButt

8 -Protecting kids from learning about safe sex. My mum still holds her hand over my eyes when

people kiss in a movie. Im 17. christiansi1

9 -Dont criticise your daughters appearance. And even more importantly, dont spend a lot of time

criticising the appearance of yourself and others. My mum comments on the appearance of everyone:

herself, people on TV, people on the street, me. Even if shes saying something good about the

appearance of others, its still putting a lot of attention on appearance in general. Its very dangerous.

EveryoneElseIsWrong

10 -Encourage them to try new things and fail at them. I grew up in a house of all-or-none; you either

did something better than anyone else, or you didnt do it at all. If I wasnt the best as what I was doing,

my dad would tell me it was useless and I should leave it to someone who could do it. This led to me

being scared to try anything new. I lived, for a very long time, in a world of black or white. It prevented

me learning new things and finding new things that I loved. It insulated me so much that I ended up

only finding comfort and security in a bottle of whiskey. Im committed to always encouraging my kids

to try new things. And fail at them. And then try them again. Or try something else. And I will never, ever

answer their questions about the world by telling them to shut up or that it doesnt matter. We google

just about everything, and its a great feeling to learn something new right alongside them. I want my

kids to be better and smarter and everything-er than I ever was. Sucking at something is the first step to

being sort of good at something. Stickley Man

Which parenting technique would you add to this list and why? Join the conversation below.

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Related reading:

The modern parenting techniques screwing kids up (http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/reddit-

slams-the-modern-parenting-techniques-screwing-kids-up/story-fnet08ui-1226744457728) from

news.com.au

8 discipline mistakes parents make (http://www.parenting.com/article/8-discipline-mistakes-parents-make)

from parenting.com

10 bad parenting habits (http://health.howstuffworks.com/pregnancy-and-parenting/10-bad-parenting-

habits.htm) from howstuffworks

Continue the conversation on Twitter: @KidspotSocial (https://twitter.com/KidspotSocial) | @danielstrudwick

(https://twitter.com/danielstrudwick) | @newscomauHQ (https://twitter.com/newscomauHQ)

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