the iron warrior magazine: volume 2, issue 2

8/14/2019 The Iron Warrior Magazine: Volume 2, Issue 2

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The Big ed ssue


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The Computer RevolutionA Video Series Sponsored byThe Centre for Society, Technology and Values11 :30 - 12:30 pmDC 1302

HIGH SPEED/HIGH PERFORMANCE(15 June)The program covers the new horizonsbeing opened by computer technology:Synchronizing a multitude of soundsacross large distances, computer graphics utilizing as possible 167 milliondifferent colours, computer simulation ofeverything from air flow around anautomobile to entire imaginary cities.The program also shows how a computer actually processes data.

DATA AS POWER(22 June)Information has become the key tool inthe battle for survival and success.Fishermen and farmers sit in front ofcomputer screens to learn where thefish are biting, the latest price of grain,the harvest forecast. Computer imaging

and printing have speeded up the dissemination of information; otherprocesses disseminate information viasatellite and fibre optic lines as quicklyas it is received. There is no data tosuggest that people are understandingmore -- only that they are receiving moreinformation. In the medical field computers offer the ability to match diseaseswith cures, and those in need ofspecieal treatment with those able toprovide it.

THE NEXT FRONTIER(29 June)

. ow will p o p l ~ and computers worktogether into the future? Ufe withoutcomputers is already unimaginable.Computers accelerate calculations byfactors of thousands or millions. Computers make office work more efficient,while dehumanizing it. Military applications are major areas of computer innovation, spearheaded by the Develpment

You too can own a box of this fascinating magazinel Yours for only the low price of $0.01 . Available in the orifce for a limited time only(minimun purc hase of 1 box per customer) Ryerson Road-trip - 'nuff said\ \ .1 \ . . ,_, J _ .

of Advanced Reasearch PlanningAgency which is developing new artifcintelligence software and expert systems, speech comprehension , machivision , computer vision, and naturallanguage comprehension.

ARTIFICALINTELLIGENCE/REAL PROBLEMS((6 July)The next step is for computers to beable to mimic the human mind thatperform in accordance with that combnation of memory, "'tu ition, understaning, emotion, and subject selectivity wcall intelligence. While artificial intelligence experiments are becomingincreasingly sophisticated, industry isturning yesterday's copywriters' dreaminto reality. Undoubtedly, today's science fiction will be ordinary tomorrow


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Editor in ChiefKim Farwell

Assistant EditorGreg YardleyMissing n ActionAd GurusCould Be You

LayoutKim Farwellyes, that explains a few things)

Darkroom TrollScott Chandler Ugh? The Iron Warrior MagazineVolume 2 Issue 2

13 June, 1994In This IssueThe Environment .................................. 2

Are you doing your part to help?Liberty nd Engineering .... ...............6

Darwin, Doo and P**5 do the EastDear IW .............. ...................... ....... 9

Trash those EditorsFrom the Deans Desks ...................4

Environmental Engineering will be a Reality This Fall

Tales from Around the Campfire., 74A Bottle O Djinn

Ritual of the Calling of an Engineer 7What's Really Behind an Iron Ring

Eng Soc Fee Referendum, ............... . 8More Money ..

Spews Everywhere, ...................... 76- 78All the Exec and even the Feds

Editorial ................................... ........ 79


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Proposed Changes to theEngineering C DMichael WorryVP FinanceAmanda Allen, Leah MacKinnon, Judel/RodriguesC D Managers

The Coffee and Donut shop had been serving Engineers for a long time. Yet with the turnover every fourmonths ofC&D managers and the exec there has neverbeen a unified approach to its long term organization.The Engineering A and B Societies are consideringmoving from our current organization of a directorshipchangjng every term and full-time cashiers, to having afull-time manager and a roster of student cashiers. Thisis a major change for the C&D and we should considerit carefully. Problems with the current system include:

- Accounting inconsistencies between terms. e.g.problems with taxes, invoicing, bills forgotten, management has no professional training.

-Administration of personnel changes every fourmonths leading to employees jobs being modified andexpectations changing continuously.-Current management structure allows little room

for expansion of services or hOUTS.- 0 effective inventory, health, financial, or tender

ing system in place.The proposed changes address r-- ' ....--,many of these problems, while at the to -

same time providing student employment. There are also some disadvantages:

The positions which Cindy andMary (the present cashiers) hold mayno longer be available.

-Transition time in between termsas the new roster of cashiers is scheduled.

Creat deal of trust placed in fulltime manager.

We may consider other alternatives.For.example, perhaps since Engineershave such busy schedules we can _iii'only reliably expect one student

i

cashier. A system to provide for this could then have the full time manager, one full time cashieone student cashier position available.

A-Soc has already approved moving to the fullmanger student cassystem. This is the archture most C&D's from societies use. We will being on these changes anext council meetinJune 22nd. Your classwill be asking in classmany people would being to commit to workC&D should these chabe implemented. Stusupport is crucial toidea's success-let yourreps bring your opiniocouncil.

bout the pocalypseVP Constantly Moving Stuff in the OrificeIf you aren't STRESSED by now, you've gotproblem

So, apparently we've survived another few weeks.Dawn's world is famng to pieces because she no longerseems capable of properly counting out a roll of pennies, but I've stopped floating around Needless Helllong enough to notice some other things that are crumbling the infrastructure of our society. Normally, I canrely on the ComputerScience Oub to provide m withsome pretty good kind ling for these whine columns,but this time around, rve got to thank Chris Redmondand his troop over at The Gazette for their fine work.-On the cover of the May 18th issue of the Gazette,we see a woman holding a picture of her 11 month oldchild. The caption reads [this University employeeJ,who spends most of her days updating records for students with surnames G through K ... We are payingfor ONE PERSON whose sole duty seems to be toupdate the records of people whose last names startwith 5 LEITERS OF THE ALPHABET? I figure tlleremust be someone over there whose sole job is toremove important updates from the files of studentswith names G-K.

-MOTHER OF GOD AND SAINTS PRFSERVE US,THIS ISN'T HAPPENING, THEY ARE NOT COMING OUT WITH A FULL LENGlH FEATURE FILMSTARING BARNEY. Yes folks, if you haven't alreadyheard, Barney and all his friends will soon be hittingtlle big screen, and our last meals will soon be hitting

the wall. This sign of the apocalypse doesn't apply tothose in 2B Meeh, who are probably already organizing a class trip to see the making of the movie.-In a recent issue of the MathNews, the intro to theesc article reads Hello fellow oxygen exchangers.Do they really have a problem with wldead peoplejoining their club? I wouldn't be surprised. After all,Woody is a member.-Cats who eat Friskies are spontaneously takingflight and orbiting cat food boxes at high speed. o m ~one should really start investigating tlUs phenomena. Ipersonally think that its a conspiracy by the militaristic,tyrannical, transsexual hispanic Reform Party members, but my theories rarely hold water.

-The Computer and Electrical Engineering classes of1997 have pulled off more stunts than anyone else hasthis term. This just isn't normal folks The last Electricalclass to win P**5 was Shandrickameg Boombaras backin the mid 80s. [Nope, it was Ohm Rangers, Winter 91- Ed] Since then, most E CE classes have known theirplace. Let's WAKEUP, people.

-Read the article in the May If\th Gazette describingthe convocation ceremony at a South American wliversity. When a faculty member was asked about what hethought of the ceremony, which included, amongother things, the distribution of confetti to the ~ d u -ates for them to tluow around the auditorium, friendsand family joining the graduates and drinking awaywhile the ceremony was still going on, and a giganticinflated penis being paraded into the building, themost negative comment he had was, This is starting

to get out of hand. My own opinion is that should realize that you're not supposed to have futhese ceremonies. Just ask anyone who went to onweeks ago. Besides, I can only imagine how mstroke victims there would be if we decided to ruconvocations this way in the future. Hmmrnmrnm-Dave has hit the jackpot in Bad Cats five strtimes. Now if only he could stop hurting himself squently.

Well, that's all I could think of for this week. I'ming to think that I'm running out of ideas for thiumn, but I figure, so long as people like Rushbaugh are still breathing, I'll always be able to findcators of our downfall. In the meantime, don't forcelebrate these upcoming and as yet unrecognational holidays. Hopefully, whoever's doing lwon't hackoff 2/3 of my dates to make my article

June 10 - First r i v ~ ThruRestaurant opens, 195J11 - First teenager drives backwards through a

d r i v ~ t h r u 1952J 13 -The Ford Foundation launches a study toincrease the cultural level of IV shows, 1951J 14 - Mr. Ed premiers, 1951J 15 - Jim Belushi is born, 1954J 21-CBSintroduces the first LP, 1948J 24 - World record set for spitting watermelon s(68" 9'),1989J 29 - Frrst IV sold with a remote control, 1964J30 - Mike Tyson (#316394) is born, 1966July 1 -DanAkroyd is born, 1952 . .


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Environmental RealitiesDan GariepyCiverely Damaged

I am a fourth year O w Engineer and I can't believesome of the shit I am hearing. The are some reallywhacked people out there who have a vexy unrealisticperspective on the environment. The thing that scaresme the most is that an overwhelming majority of thepopulation appears to ignore th e real life application ofenvironmental issues.

"HEY I recycle and I only use recycled paper, Idrive a brand new car that emits less pollution to theatmosphere, you say, indignant of my accusation.That's my point exactly.

Before I came to University I had to interview thetown engineer for a school project. I asked him howthe recycling program was going and he proudly saidthat things were going very well with nearly an 80%participation rate. I was impressed. I figured we wereprobably making a pretty penny to boot, with all thosemarketab le recyclables. I asked the engineer who wewere selling the stuff to. His expression was less recep-tive. He said that they had been stockpiling some recyclable goods into warehouses. They were quickly running out of space and had to consider another ware-

house or disposal. I hope the stuff has made it out ofthe warehouse by now.

That was a couple of years ago. Thing havechanged, right? ot exactly. Two terms ago I rkedfor an environmental engineering finn based just outside of Toronto. I was at the president' house onenight in Aurora and I remarked, jokingly, that he wasthe only one who had not put out his blue box . Hegave me this look I won't soon forget. 'Tm n t goingto pay for them to take my recyclables to the dump."According to him, this town didn' t have enough warehouses to store the "valuable" recyclables and they justkept on dumping them in with the rest of the garbage.

What kind of recycled paper do you use? Do youuse the 10% recycled paper? It does help but there is atrade off in terms of more bleaching and chemicalprocesses involved. in the recycling. If evexyone beganrecycling their paper today, there would be an enormous surplus in recycling. Just do the math. we consume 100 sheets a day and we recycle these, we will get1(XX) sheets of 10% recycled paper. Let's assume thathalf of the paper is lost in the recycling process. Thiswould mean 500 sheets of 10% recycled paper wereproduced. We would not have to recycle our paper forthe next five days. The paper waste would HAVB togo to the dump. This assumes that evexy 11e uses the

-So WllafC I uf in Those iffy ?

Tina SalamonRecycling Director

Here it is folks: answers to those recycling questionsthat keep you tossing and turning at night.Q - What can I put in the blue box in my class

room?A -0) EMPTY cans

2) EMPTY bottles3) EMPTY PEr bottles

Q - Why do the cans and bottles hafta be empty?A - Cause if they're not, the blue boxes will quicklybecome smelly and we'll be over-run by fruit flies."Empty" also means you shouldn't jam your straw,serviette, muffin wrapper, sandwich paper etc. in theempty container - there's a garbage can for those.Q - That blue box is soooo far away from where I sit

I just leave my EMPTY bottle on the table, will it getrecycled?A - Not likely. The custodial staff don't have time torun evexything to the blue box, so it will end up in thegarbage. Please don't let this happen ... grab your bottle and make the journ ey yourself.Q- I 'm really keen on recycling fine paper andnewsprint. Can these go in the classroom blue boxestoo?A - No . Hey ... didn't you read the answer to the firstquestion?If you want to recycle paper, look: outside, between CPH and E1, for a big blue

newsprint bin

in computer rooms or at the library for fine paperbins

Q - I like putting stuff in those big recycling bins onwheels that I see around campus. Any advice onthose?A- Yeah. Read the labels to avoid throwing stuff inthe wrong bin. Cans and plastic (PEr) bottles go in the bins for cans.Uds from juice bottles can go in here too. "Clear glass means glass that is both clear and

colourless. "Coloured glass" means what you think it does. The open bins in front of the D marked "cardboard only" are for ... corrugated cardboard and kraftpaper only you have garbage you want to get ridof, turn 180 degrees and you'll see a garbage can. (corrugated cardboard =cardboard with an internal rip-pled layer; kraft paper = things like brown paper bags,and manilla envelopes)Q - I've heard that pop can tabs are being collected tohelp buy wheelchairs. Where can I put my pop cantabs?A - There's a mini blue box for pop can tabs hangingfrom the railing above the bins in CPH foyer. There'salso a collection container on the counter around theinfo desk in the Orifice.

- Q- Whoemptiestheblueboxes?A- Student volunteers - your classmates. Pleasehelp them out by following the advice above.

recycled paper and tha t no one will use anything else.Jud ing by the actions of the two municipalities,

would sa that the supply is far ceeding the demandAnd for that n w car? I'm really glad to hear that i

has reduced emissions. Good show. What about thon ou just trashed? Was it so bad you couldn't havek pt on using it? Y u continued using your old caand tried to maintain the emissions at a low level youwould ha e done th environment a better favourWhere clid that one go? Th energy expended to produce tllat n w automobile ha caused its own set opollutants and problems. And so you emit less harmful chemicals to th atmosphere. Where are th y goinginstead? Th yare probably ending up in your catalyticconvertor. Actually, the fuel does burn better in thesenew cars but the emissions don't clisappear. When youadd the environmental cost of that new car, what hathe environment really gained?

We have to have a more realistic view of the environment. The fact is that unless we figure out a way tostop breathing, we will not be able to survive muchlonger anyway. The carbon dioxide emissions fromliving animals is a prob lem that cannot be solved unlesswe stop life itself. Don't give me that rain forest sobstory either. 1 doubt in the long run it will matter. Idoesn't hurt, but it will not "save the earth". With thekind of population growth the planet is experiencingwe would have had to choose between trees andhuman lives anyway. This argument sound s extremebut given enough time, that could be what it will mdown to.

The fundamentals fo physics still apply to the environment. Matter cannot be created nor destroyedWhen we produce garbage, it will always be. We canrecycle it, reduce it, eat it, drink it, whatever. It will stilexist. there are harmful chemicals in the garbagethey won't disappear either. The nature of most hannful chemicals is that they are difficult to break downThat is what makes them harmful. In some casebreaking them down makes them mQre harmful

You must figut (' th"t I have \()';t, 11 wiIllo 1i . l:'lmso dep St d


6/20

Doof and Darwin takeP 5 Guy to the EasternSeaboardDarwin Zacher, S.O.S.Steve Doof Dufour, Electrical Cir-cus

"Ooof " I shouted .I'v e be en looking for you, Ooofreplied. "We're going to Boston ."I ha d ju s t sp ent th e af te rnoonbringing my bicycle into the shop tobe repa ired, and wa s coming out ofthe Kmart with a few things for theupcoming Calcul a tor Boat-racingevent.Okay. You do realize though,'that I have to wait until my bike isfixed so can ride it home, I clarified."Yes know, we ' ve already beenthere looking for you," replied Steve."The only thing I can't figure out iswhere you were in between P.O.E.T.5.and the bike shop."McGinnis.""Oh."

And so that is how the weekendstarted; we grabbed a few thingsincluding:- Three sleeping bags and one tent- One camfing stove- One 24 0 Coca-cola- Three (OOPS ) Two low-burdenedVISA cards- One North American road atlas- One reliable beater car (Ooo's)- Two cameras- One Waterloo Engineering hard-hat- One large Waterloo Engineering

banner- One 10" Ridgid tool- Three gung-no electrical and computer engineering studentsAt 7:00 p.m. we set off for the border;at 5:00 a.m. the following morning wearrived in:

top #1: BostonNot too much is open at five am on aSaturday morning, nevertheless we pro-

ceeded to take in the sights of Boston.We started out with 01' Ironside: theU.S.5. Constitution, an old warship. Wethen saw the Bunker Hill memorial(something to which one of the Constitution's shipmates took great pride intelling us the number of steps). Then itwas off to the Waterloo of the south ..

things to do this weekend.

that's right,M.LT. Here'sOoof and Kylein one of theM.LT. buildings, showingoff the bannerwith the M.I.T.beaver. I tookthe photofrom standingon top of afireplace mantle. Welooked for anactual livebeaver, butfigured theyhad it undertight cover -besides wehad other

Our next stop was Cheers (Bull andFinch), ya know, that funky little placewhere everybody knows your name. Westopped in and bought some shirts, wegrabbed some pins and a photo of ourselves with the infamous banner. Thenwe drove around for a bit, we saw theBoston Tea Party (an old boat), the RoyalBoston Hotel (which has yacht parking)and a first for me - a car with bulletholes in it Yahoo By 12:00 pm we haddone Boston, so we started out on ourway towards Cape Cod.

Stop #2: Plymouth RockThis was one of the more historicalplaces visited; we parked the car andstarted walking around and soon stumbled upon Plymouth Rock. t is some-'what easy to miss Plymouth Rockbecause what most people think of as a

huge rock face is simply a small bouldeno larger than a barbecue with "1620carved into it (was Michealangelo oboard?).We then moseyed through the graveyard - was that ever old. Three word"Big Honkin' Crypts " After seeing tholdest gravestone and a couple hundre

memorials of places where the initial setlers once took a dump, we settled bacinto the car and continued south tExeter, Rhode Island, where we wertold there was a campground. t turneout that there was on ly a Scout camthat was not yet open, so we camped fothe night in some field somewhere. Th

was the first time our fearless heroes haslept this weekend.

Stop #3: McDonalds in Rhode IslandWe stopped for breakfast in Hopkinton, Rhode Island and grabbed somMcMuffins and O.}. Taking some watewe then proceeded outside to brush oteeth in the ditch in front of the McOonaIds sign.


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Stop #4:YALESo, wewere Inthe car,

righ t ?And Darwin said:Ya kno",',we rea llyn eed a1Io.=-..:.___ .:IIIL...- =::.JIloililll S how e r .Let's graba shower at YALE . They've gotta have agym somewhere .."

Ou tside the gym building, we saw themost honkin' street sign Here are ourown reflections of the _ _ . . - . r ~ meaning portrayed bytha t oh so m ys ticalsign .Upon arn vm g a tYALE we d iscove redit was commencementday Needless to say

we found th e gy mand sn ea ked in to alocker room. Low and ' - - ~ ' - ' - - ~ 'behold we fou nd the coldest [Obscenityremoved at authors request. - Ed] showersin the known worldWe sa w th e si ght s, ~ 1 i Mcha tted with a couple ofgrads and headed onour way to:

Stop #5: New York CityWhere to start? Well,first we got lost in th e L ~ M I ~ 2 JBronx. Then we got lostin New Jersey. Finally we fou nd Manhattan We found the most ama zing fr eeparking spot right next to Ba ttery Park ,and took a stroll down to th e Liber tyIsland ferry. There was a huge group ofpeople all d ressed in formal for a poshpa r ty on the Island. We asked to jOin ,but w e couldn't get th e bo w ties andcummerbunds to look good with our Tshirts, shorts and sandals . (Ya know . ..)So we settled for a walk down WallStreet, saw the stock exchange, saunteredover to the World Trade Center andplanted a bomb (HAHAHAHA We'llget you yet, Mario" ) We toured the restof southern Manhattan on foot thendrove towards what we thought was theEmpire State Building. After parking thecar, seeing the U.s.s. Intrepid, walkingthrough Times Square and Grand Central Station we arrived . Upon enteringthe building, the security guard told usthere was no observation tower. What agyp Turns out we were in the Chryslerbuilding. A few blocks and a few blisters later we hit the Empire State Build-

ing. Three words: beauy hankin' view - especially at night. \Ve awthe rest of vlanhattanthe quick way - looking out from the top -- -- , ,,'.IStruggling our wa ba kto the car, we happenedbv uch ite as Madison Square Garden andMacy' departm ntstore. ~ ; ; Y F r ' ' c

Getting back in the carwe decided it l'\'as time for supper (1 :00a.m. is good) so we headed to t h ~ infamous "H ack en sa ck , New Je r ey"Besides the n am e, th i to wn ha d noredeeming qu alities except a atura tedhotel and a T.G.I. Fridays. We found acockroach motel that accepted cash onlyand crashed for the night; Monday wasgoing to be a busy day.

Stop #6: The Statue of LibertyWe wen t,We wai ted (in line),We pulled a stunt. (See pic ture on frontpage)

Stop #7: Dave's PIa - h e Ed Su llivanTheaterWe thought we'd complete our weekend w ith an impromptu appearance onthe Late Show After negotiating ourway through Manhattan rush-hour in an

overheating car, we found a nice $1.50 /hour spo t right in Dave's back yard. Weeven saw Dave himself d riving aroundin his Limo.

Tip to anyone wishing to go see Dave:You must line up at the Ed Sullivan Theater (DClve'_ PIa e) at 7:00 am to have ade ent chance at getting in the show.Once our mission wa complete, wedrove eight hours straight back to Wa terloo, our hearL full of glee, ou r so u Isreplenished, our eye struggling to tayopen.


8/20

You Want Some Response Huh?... 1 11 Bite 1 ~WearIW,I've always been one of those backroom aiticsof themedia, always bttdling about tt but never actually doinganything about it. The last issue of The Iron Warriorchanged my mind . I found some elements of the lastissue so deplorable that I I had to respond.Let's start with Greg Yardley's "So Submtt Dammtt"edttorial article. Iam assuming he is the author butthere was no signature or byline to oonf irm this. Someof his assumptions are false. Had Mr. Yardleyresearched his topic he might have realized thatCanada produces the most engineers per capitaseoond only to Japan . The most recent figures Ioouldfind were from 1980, in a UNESCO report entitled:"Engineering Manpower" . Japan produces 6.2 engineers per 10 000 population with bachelors degreesand Canada produces 3.9 engineers for the samenumber. The nearest oompetttor is New Zealand with3.1 engineers per capita . The study states that thisnumber is "a good measure of the ..engineering flowinto society" . The problem must lie elsewhere ;we arecertainly doing our part as a oountry to produceengineers at a fast enough rate.

LOOking at these figures , I figured that we must haveone of the highest per capita engineering population ofany oountry in the world. With a ittle more digging , Ifound out that Iwas mistaken.When I called Allison Banier of the Canadian Societyof Professional Engineers in Ottawa with the statementthat I hought that Canada must have one of the highestengineering populations per capita ,she almost brokeout laughing . She did not have any figures to back it up,but she said that this was certainly not the case. Iwillnot be able to get the figures before the deadline , butwill produce them for the next issue. The point is thatthe demand is certainly there. However,we are alreadyproducing engineers as fast as we can. The existingnumbers is where the problem lies.

We don't have enough engineers out there now . [Ohyeah? Ask the '94 grads just how many of hem havejobs right now. - Eal No matter how quickly we produceengineers from this point on, we will be playing catch up.Once we readl capacity, we will be producing too manyengineers for the market and that would not be goodeither. [I guess w need a PID rontrol system on thenumber ofengineers w prrxiuce -EalTo relieve the immediate deficiency in engineering,the solution seems obvious. Ifwe don't have the skillright now, we should get it from somewhere else. If weallow engineers and their families to immigrate toCanada then there will not be a problem. We oouldallow the older people to immigrate so that onceCanada can supply the engineers required, theimmigrant engineers will be retiring. Of oourse thegovernment will not alkm this to happen. They say thatthey will not allow any immigrant to "take Canadian'sjobs". In actual fact, this legislation does not allow fairoornpetition on aworld scale tor professionals. I knowof one A rchttect who was denied entry into Canada whowould have certainly answered a demand that is notbeing filled by Canadian architects . He would not be sostupid as to oome over without having any prospects foremployment. If the demand is as great as Mr. Yardleyportrayed it to be, then there should be enough capacityto allow this kind of immigration.Moreover, Iam just plain tired of the "I can't afford

tuition for eng ineering ,subsidize me . Bite me. [Thiscan be arranged. -Eal Our tuition oovers a very smallportion of the cost of our education. I hink that's enoughsubsidies , thank you very mum. It's not like the schoolsare starving for enrollment either. Every university Ihave ever heard of is at capacity in engineering.a,viously someone can afford to get their engineeringdegree .Allow me to tum my attention to Kim Farwell 's articles .The first one "For the Rest of Us .." was a well writtenpiece that followed an argument through reasonablywell. I iked it except for one mistake that everyoneseems to be making these days . She called KurtCobain 's death "drug-related . Last time I checked, hedied from a shotgun blast to the head brought on bybeing tucked up in general. [while on heroin, making hisdeath drug-related though not necessarily drug-caused.- Eo) The man suffered from ulcers,chronic back painand (obviously) severe bouts of depression. There arethose who say that he first had a problem with drugs asa s u ~ of the pain killers he had been prescribed forthese problems. Buy that or not, the point Iam trying tomake is that heroin did not kill Kurt Cobain; he was wellon the road to his own demise i t h o u t ~ The heroin didnot oonvince a friend of Cobain 's to buy the weapon.The heroin did not make the shotgun jump into hishands. The heroin did not pull the trigger. The wholetruth of the matter is that we have no idea what anyperson thinks. We should no be so quick to judge aperson by some lyrics and the media's portrayal.I foura her seoond jJticIe"APlea for a Better-LookingMargarine" editorial more disturbing . Aside from the factthat I found the subject pretty vapid , it was not veryoonvincing. If Ms . Farwell is going to pick a topic that isso weak she should at least have a strong argument.She is asking why the dairy folk have imposed thisoolouration legislation on margarine manufacturers.[No more like she was lookjng for space-filler for lastmonths skinny issue -Eal She later proceeds to explainhowaappy margarine looks when t is white or brightyellow. She has answered her own question . Obviously the dairy people are seeking to lower the oonsumption

of margarine by makingits appearance lessappealing. It appearsthat Ms . Farwell does notlike the look of margarine, perhaps enough that shewould (maybe even subconsciously) hesitate to useDoes this seem like a personal attack on the editoto you? Maybe you 're right. They do represent whaThe Iron Warrior will be th is term. Iwas talking to Kimyesterday and she is having problems just keeping tpaper afloat finandaJly. She enlightened me with sofacts about Kurt Cobain's death that I did not know.After my disrussion with her, I researched it a ittledeeper. I realize that there is a lot of work involved inbeing an editor and Ioommend both of them for takion this responsibility. However, n the past, Ihave sebetter articles come off the edrtor's desk.Wait a minute, you righteous bastard What haveyou done for the IW lately?" you 're probably saying.Dick all. That's why Isubmitted an article along with letter. Idon't feel that it would be fair to critidze thepeople who make up The Iron Warrior if Ididn 't try tochange the things Idisliked. I think this will be the firsarticle that anyone from my class has ever submittedtried to research my sources as best Ioould to writeinformed piece . Iwill 'gladly take oonstructive criticismyou submtt. Kim and Greg will get their chance to a me up too.

Dan GariepyCiverly Damaged

[Hurray We managed to finally get some fXJOrapathetic engineer so riled up that he had to write.Thank you Dan et you be a model for the rest of heExcept next time you submit do it electronically; i.e.disk. -Eo)

Stolen ooksDearIW,

I'm madl Damn mad It's not often I'm this unhappy.But let me first explain my situation . Iwas in 38 n theFall term of 1993. Immediately after, Istayed oncampus tor a WOI 1< term. When Spring term neared, Idecided to move. Having lived at a place tor eightconsecutive months, I have m ssed quite a fewpersonal items.

During my winter WOI 1< term, I had (and stiD have) alittle cubicle office in the VLSIIab (third floor DC). It'sbasically a research Iabratory for grad students workingon drruit design. All grad students there have their littlecubicle offices and none seems to think otherwise whenthey leave their personal belongings in their cubicles.So I hought that it would be safe for me if during thetransition moving period, that I place a few of the heavieritems in my office. So as my winter WOI 1< terms wasooming to a close, I started moving my text books andother personal books into the shelf in my office. When I

bought my books for this Spring term, Ialso chose totemporarily store them in my cubicle until I have cleaenough room at my new place of residence for thesitems .

Just this past Monday (May 16, 1994), I walked inmy cubicle, wanting to take a few of my texts homeme. To my surprise, I noticed certain very large empgaps in my shelf that used to be filled with books. Mfirst thought was that someone had just borrowed soof my books. After all, grad students in the VLSIIabthat all the time. But as I examined what books wermissing,l realized that this was not the case. llaststhem the previous Monday (May 9,1994) so I knewthe books must have been taken between May 9 anMay 16.

I thought in an area sudl as the VLSllab, it wassuppose to be a place where intellectuals gather andexpress their ideas through their work In addition, I


9/20

Stolen Books coolthought there was something called Engineering Ett OCsn But a doser look at the stuffstolen from my office , one can eac>ily see a pattern . All the texis for the EledricaI3Bterm were taken. Obviously, the thief had something very specific in mind. He or shealso ~ e n t y has an affinity toYIards the stod< market

I hen tried to find out which undergrad has ac x ess to the lab and is presently in 3AElectrical. Ihave come up with a couple of names. So what? What can Ido OON? Icertainly can't justcome out and accuse them; I'm not certain to any degree. I reallycouldn't care less who this person is. I simply want my stuff back.

Throughout my stay at his university, thave heard countless times about howethical the engineering profession is, how we are taught an ethics course in first year,how most engineering students are OON required to take some sort of "STY' courseand how engineers should deserve respect from their communities. It is a nobleimage, something that Iwould like to believe in. However, only takes one badinddent to make a proud engineering student wonder if all of these seIf-boasting andseff-congratulatory remarks are simply just brail flNaShing propaganda. Yes , my case isan isolated incident Yes , nothing like this has ever happened in the VLSIIab. Yes,this does not happen everyday. But does not change how I feel.The se rdl continues ...Stanley Ma4A Electricalsjanaelecom2.watstar

Challenger PictureIna riate:DearIW,

Iwould like to make a point in regards to the design of the Eng Soc B' Spring Blotter.When I first saw the blotter I was q u ~ e impressed with this term's design as comparedto past terms. The use of two colours, as well as the small pictures used to signifyevents taking place on various days make the blotter look very professional and wellplanned. Iwas shocked and disappointed, however, when Inoticed that the pictureused for VICtoria. Day depicts the Challenger shuttle disaster. I eel very strongly thatthis is in extremely poor taste, and the designers of the blotter used bery bad judgement in choosing this photo. The firewor1


10/20

From the Deans DesksThis is the first publication of a neW feature in The Iron Warrior. From theDeans' Desks is a means for the Dean of Engineering and the AssociateDeans to commicate with the student body. This column will provide infor-mation about new programs and courses, as well as updates on the projects inwhich our Deans are invo lved. Please read on .

Environmental Engineering B.ASc Program Starts in Fall 1994Introduction

Commencing September 1994, the Faculty of Engineering at the University of Waterloo will offer adegree program in Environmental Engineering. Thenew degree program expands and enhances a considerable and ongoing involvement with environmentalconcerns.

The Farulty has, for a considerable time, offeredcourses and options that relate directly to environmental concerns from an engineering perspective. Thesehistorical initiatives include designated Faculty options(the Water Resources Option and the EnvironmentalEngineering Option) and Departmental options (e.g.,the Biotechnology Option, the Environmental (Ge0-Physical) flu id Dynamics Option, the Pollution Control Option, and the Societal and Environmental Systems Option).These activities will continue.

The new Environmental Engineering degree program provides an additional choice for students; achoice which results in a more comprehensive development of environmental engineering expertise.Giventhe extensive opportunities provided by the cooperative system, and the breadth and depth of the faculty atWaterloo, the Environmental Engineering degree program desaibed herein will be unique and excellent.Engineering and the EnvironmentIn engineering educa tion and practire, it is essential that there be an increasing awareness and concernfor the environment. Environmental engineeringencompasses both the prevention of, and remediationof water, air and soil contamination, with the mix ofengineering work varying substantially from one problem to another. Engineers must have the tools andskills to sua:essfullyand effectively incorporate environmental aspects into their work This capability isrequired both in the design, development, constructionand operation of processes and plants, whether industrial or municipal, and in dealing with the downstreamconsequences (pollution) resulting from poor practices,accidents, and scientific and social limits. Migrationpathways that expose humans and ecosystems tounacreptable pollutant levels as a result of historicalpractices and accidents in.residual disposal and inindustrial and urban development, are examples of theneed to reflect envirorunental concerns in engineeringdecisions.

The envirorunent, society, and industry are complex systems which are interdependent. It is not possi-ble to develop a single engineering program to coversuch a broad, complex area. Therefore, the Faculty ofEngineering at the University of Waterloo has developed an integrated approach for incorporating greaterenvironmental content into engineering education. Westart from the premise that all engineers must inrorporate environmental considerations into their professional practice. Hence, all programs offered in the Faculty of Engineering incorporate environmentally related examples and applications into the core materiaLand several programs include technical electives withan environmental focus. In addition, engineering students in programs other than Environmental Engineering may take an enriched program incorporating a

substantial Environmental Engineering Option whichappears on the transcripts and diplomas of graduateswho successfully complete this option.Environmental Engineering ProgramIn addition to the above, the Faculty will now offera new degree program in Environmental Engineeringfor those wishing to specialize to a greater extent. Theprogram has two branches. For the Chemical Engineering Branch, primary emphasis is on the integrationof environmental and ecological issues within the planning, design, operation and management of industrialand other technological processes. For the Civil Engineering Branch, primary emphasis is on the minimiza-tion, treatment, remed iation and risk assessmentaspects of the solid, liquid and gaseous wastes that areassociated with living in a modem society.

The environmental engineering degree programinitially will have a maximum enrolment of about 70first year students with approximately 30 admitted tothe Chemical Engineering Branch, and approximately40 admitted to the Gvil Engineering Branch. The Environmental Engineering rogram will be a singlestream (Stream 4 program; that is, EnvironmentalEngineering students start in September with fourmonths of school before going out on the first worktenn in January.Cltemical Engineering Branch

The most distinctive element of the ChemicalEngineering Branch of the Environmental Engineeringdegree program is the emphasis on process engineering and control that it has in common with the Chemical Engineering degree prograin.

In the long tenl\ the most effective way to reduceenvironmental degradation and pollution is to stop itfrom occurring. Incorporation of environmental principles and constraints in every stage of planning anddesign from initial conrept to operational status is theoptimal way to ensure the creation of plants andprocesses which can be operated and controlled tominimize pollution. Existing, as well as new, plantsand processes must be controlled and operated so thatmaterials which would degrade the air, water and soilare eliminated or contained. With their process engineering background, graduates from the Environmental Engineering rogram (Chemical EngineeringBranch willbe ideally suited to address these needs.CivilEngineering Branch

Within the Gvil Engineering Branch, there will betwo themes, the Waste Treatment and ManagementTheme and th Water and Soil Quality Theme. Thesebuild on existing departmental strengths. The premiseis that all human activities result in some degree ofimpact on the environment and the interest is inachieving a balance between economic developmentand environmental protection. For example, solidwaste management is more than just waste disposal- itis waste generation, waste reduction, energy recovery,and disposal of the residual in an environmentallyacceptable manner. Improving water quality in riversis more than just monitoring of pollutant levels - it

must be translated into such features as wateplanning, reduction of pollutant discharges, and diation of historical disposal practices. Historicallclient in many engineering tasks was the municior a governmental agency; now, in many cases, thpayer is having much more direct input. The gradfrom the Environmental Engineering Degree ProGvil Engineering Branch) will have the educa

credentials to be important, contributing membthe resolution of these engineering problems.Where do we go from here?

In summary, this new degree program is baGvil and Chemical Engineering; no new departmbeing formed. The program will be administeredboard consisting of the Dean of Engineering, theciate Dean of Undergraduate Studies, faculty memfrom the Civil and Chemical Engineering Dments, plus a few other members to be decideEngineering Faculty CounciL Day- to-day responty for the students (course approval, examinatiopromotion recommendations, work term reportations, etc.) in the Chemical and Civil EngineBranches will rest with the Departments of Cheand Gvil Engineering, respectively. The Faculty ence and Faculty of Environmental Studies aretributing to the offering of this new program.

When the proposal for this program was suted to the Provinre of Ontario in July 1993, it wthe basis that we would re-organize existing proand avoid incurring long-term additional costscurriculum approved by Engineering Faculty Coand Senate and included in the approved propolisted in Table 1. There will be some minor chanthe listed curriculum that will have to be approvEngineering Faculty Council and Senate. Sinceof the first year is common to the existing prograCivil and Chemical Engineering, this allowsmake a quick start on the program despite receapproval from the Province only in late AprilAlthough it was too late to advertise the progrthis year s high school graduates, we anticipatthis year s intakes into Chemical andGvilEnginwill include students who will choose to takChemical and Gvil Engineering Branches of Enmental Engineering. The students will be advisthis possibility.

Given the financi aI cutbacks that the Univhas endured over the last three years, Faculty resodictate that the degree program be phased in slFor example, the first offering of the 3A EnvE tenbe in the Spring, 1997 term. Therefore, it is unlikelstudents currently in second year and beyond wable to participate.As welL enrolment in the FacuEngineering is not being increased. Total admiinto engineering at Waterloo are being held cons740 students.

The word is out and now the real work bWe llkeep you posted.This summary was prepared by I.F. Macdonald, ChEngineering, E McBean, Civil Engineering, in conswith the Associate Dean for Undergraduate StudiSchneider and the Dean of Engineering, Dr. D.J . Buyou require further information, please contact one of th


11/20

Term

AF

1BS

2AW

2BF

3AS

3BW

4AS

4BW

ChE 102Math 114Math 117Phys 115EnvE 100

GenE 121GenE 123Math 118Phys 125CSE 1EnvE 101

EnvE 222Math 210ChE 012ChE 023Chern 026

EnvE 220ERS 241EnvE 213Math 216Bioi 250- CSE3ChE 032ChE 033EnvE 332Bioi 454

CSE4ChE 035EnvE 331EnvE 321EnvE 333

ChE 041EnvE 410EnvE 422EnvE 420Tech ElectiveEnvE 480

EnvE 483/481EnvE 403Tech ElectiveTech ElectiveChE 572orChE 574

Table 1

NvmONM T L ENGINEERNG B Se PROGR M

Chemical Engineering BranchControl and Process Engineering Theme

Chemistry for EngineersAlgebra & Vector GeometryCalculus 1MechanicsEnv E Concepts 1 (incl. Graphics)

Digital ComputationElectrical EngineeringCalculus 2Physics for EngineersEnvE Concepts 2

Applied Math 1: StatisticsAdvanced CalculusEquilibrium Stage OperationsPhys Chern 1: Thermodynamics & Phase EquilibriaOrganic Chern 1

Env Chern and Ecotoxicology(CSE 2) Intro to Environmental and Social ImpactAssessmentFluid MechanicsDifferential EquationsEcology

Introductory BiotechnologyProcess Engineering ThermodynamicsInorg Environmental Process PrincipalsEnvironmenmental Toxicology 1

Mass TransferInstrumentation & Analysis MethodsApplied Math 2: Advanced MathChemical Reaction Engineering

Intro to Process ControlTransport Processes: EnvE ApplicationsEconomics for ChE/EnvE StudentsModelling of the EnvironmentEnvE Project (0 .25 cr)

EnvE Project 1 .0/0.75 cr)(CSE 5) Environment: Regulations & Legal Issues

Air Pollution ControlTreatment of Aqueous Inorganic Wastes

Civil Engineering BranchWaste Treatment and Management (WTM) Theme and Water andSoil Qualily(WSO) Theme

ChE 102Math 114Math 117Phys 115EnvE 161GenE 170

GenE 121GenE 123Math 118Phys 125CSE 1EnvE 126

CivE 224CivE 221CivE 265CivE 292EnvS 200

EnvE 220ERS 241CivE 280CivE 222CivE 253

CSE3CivE 375CivE 353EnvE 330EnvE 320

ChE 032Chem 026CivE 381EnvS 401ChE 036orCivE 422Earth 456

Bioi 454CivE 472EnvE 430

Chemistry for EngineersAlgebra & Vector GeometryCalculus 1MechanicsEnvE Concepts 1Graphics

Digital ComputationElectrical EngineeringCalculus 2Physics for EngineersEnvE Concepts 2

Probablility and StatisticsAdvanced CalculusMaterialsEngineering EconomicsField Ecology (or Bioi 250)

Env Chem and Ecotoxicology(CSE 2) Intro to Environmental Social ImpactAssessmentFluid and Thermal SciencesDifferential EquationsGeology for Engineers

Water QualitySoil MechanicsField Sampling & Analysis TechniquesEnvironmental Resource Management

Introductory BiotechnologyOrganic Chemistry 1HydraulicsEnvironmental Law (CSE 4)(WTM) Chemical Reaction Engineering(WSQ) Finite Element Analysis, or(WSQ) Numerical Methods in Geoscience

Environmental Toxicology 1Wastewater TreatmentEnvE Project 1Tech Elective (WTM)orCivE 486 (WSQ) HydrologyTech Elective (WTM)orEarth 458

EnvE 431CSE5EnvE 477Tech Elective

(WSQ) Physical Hydrogeology

EnvE Project 2Solid Waste Management

ChE 574 (WTM) Treatment of Aqueous Inorganic Wastesor EnvE 420 (WSQ) Modelling of the EnvironmentChE 572orCivE 473

(WTM) Air Pollution Control(WSQ) Contaminant Transport


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Take Off withCASI, UW1rJ-Te ChengS grad Chair CASI UW

Arguably one of the University of Waterloo'smost surprising secrets is that it has a studentbranch of the Canadian Aeronautics and SpaceInstit ute (CASD. With many student and professional branches

across various universities nationwide, CASIstrives to promote and educate about the latestdevelopments in space and aerospace research andindustry. Interested in what's going on today inthese leading edge fields? Keen on meeting peopleinvolved in the space and aerospace industry? Itching to beef up your space/aerospace vocabulary forthat big interview? Want to put something nifty onthe resume? If you said "YES " then become amember, and come out to the events we haveplanned this term If you said "forget iLl thencome out anyway

CASI UW Events Calendar (tentative):June 16, guest speaker: Dr. Ken Money (DC]EM)former Canadian astronaut

topic Humansand SpaceflightJune 23, guest speaker: Dr. James DeLaurier

(UTIAS)topic Design of the UI1AS Ornithopter

July 7, guest speaker: Peter White, SEDS Canadatopic SEDS Canada - Students for the Exploration of Space IAND a tour of the Astrophysics department's obsetvatory

OM lab tours UW robotics lab):July 14, tour of the PAMI Lab (Systems Designportion of the OM lab)

July 21, tour of the Electrical Engineering portionof the OM lab

July 28, tour of the Mechanical Engineering portion of the O M lab

Keep an eye out for our JX Sters and updates onthe WATSTAR calendar for updates on theseevents There is also a regular advertisement on thenewsgroup uw.generaL Or sign up on our emailinglist by sending email to [email protected], andyou'll be regularly informed on what's going on inCASIUW.

And finally, if you would like to meet the exec orhelp out, then come out to the CASI UW exec meetings, which are held regularly on Wednesdays at3:30pm in E2-1306D. Feel free to email any comments or questions

I X~ i f- I -f----Z

1topper to boo t T'd uns topper Is that aword?) him again just to get the three wishes We ll,enough pondering. Back to the story.

Now it's a well-known fact that Genies must provide exactly three wishes to anyone releasing themfrom a bottle (Newton's Fundan'lental L aw o f Genies).So if Zajhulum (that's the Genie 's name, as you caneasily see from the large, yellow "Hello . My name isZajhulum" button he's wearing) follows the intent ofyour wish, a l klS1TOphic rift in the fabric of time andspace ili lf will su k the entire known universe into achurning maelstrom of paradoxical doom. This isobviously 11 t desirable.

But all is not lost. Aft r aU, Zajhulum is a enie.He quickly wishes himself a solution, and replies,"Your wish is granted, 0 my Master You may askyour next wish in ten billion years."

"Zounds and curses " you shout. (Or a reasonableapproxinlation thereof.) " want to modify my wish "

"Sorry. Can't be done. Union regulations, youknow how it is.""All right. OK I wish to retract my wish."

"You're sure you won't try to get more than onemore wish?"

"As sure as the engineering profs don't use thebell curve."

"Right. It is done. Your wish is my command, 0my Master " replies Zajhulun'l genially. (Genies haveto be genial. After all, it's in their name.)

You breathe a sigh of relief. What will youwish for? Money? Power? Fame? A co-op

placement?"I wish you to immediately be stoppered up

in the bottle again "Wow Did you just say that? Good thinkingSo you w1Stopper the bottle again.

YOU I SOLE T MORTAL HOW DAREYOU THAT " Zajhulum appears to have lostsome of his geniality "I ought to blast you to oblivionright now "

''You can't do that, I haven't wis hed it " you po intout.

"What, you think I have no w ill of my own fff"But if you destroy me, then I won ' t be able to ask

my three wishes"'Thanks For a minute there I was actually consid

ering letting you live." Zajhulum draws back. A blacknothingness, shot through with flashes of void, drawsin around his upstretched hands . His eyes tum toswirling red and green fire, and an evil ''Beaumont''grin curdles the comers of his milky smile. A horrendous cackling chortle oozes from his angry maw. Heswells immensely, towering above you. He drawsback, preparing to hurtle a ball of black hellfire throu ghyour sternum.

"I wish you to neverharmme."Wow You're amazing You're fantastic Stu

dous You must be an engineerl You have just loodeath in the eye, and stared it down with a calm potha t rivals tha t of the etern al Tool (Well, actually,may need to invest in some new shorts, but atyou're alive.) Too bad Zajhulum isn' t quite so cool.

Zajhulum's brain begins a slow broiL His chpuff out, and smoke begins to billow out of hisHe hurls the fireball at the math building, which ables like so much flimsy calculus. He lets ouanguished scream, which sounds something"AAURRAUROWAUGHABAROUGHGHG "

''I wish my shorts were clean. I wish you wimmediately stoppered up in the bottle again."

There is a clap of thunder, and a strange sucsound, like glass breaking, played backwardscheap walkman, underwater. Sitting on the tbefore you is a bottle of molten rum. You breatshaky sigh of reliet and the next day you mail thetle to Timbalaba, Atlantis. At least- you knowgenies show up in strange places, stopp ered in bott

Pirates in Tight Pan sKim FarwellErotichem

A little culture was added to Engineering this termwith a trip to Stratford to catch a preview of Pirates ofPenzance, which will have officially opened by thetime you read this. Pirates is likely to be the smash hitof the Stratford Festival. The Gilbert and Sullivan musical is no longer under copyright, therefore it is permissible to do a little playing with the script... Whether youare a COlUloisseur or a Pirates virgin, this play is a must-

If you know the script, you'll puzzle over the cast ofcharacters listed in the program. Is it the same play?

I There are a whole bunch of names you won't recognize. That's because it's been spruced up a bit, sort ofalong the lines of Kiss Me, Kate (an upbeat version ofThe Taming of the Shrew - W. Shakespeare, thoughnot to insult your intelligence ) Picture a hand-crankedmovie projector in a Hollywood studio during the earlystages of the "talkies," where Pirates is being filmed.The cast is a prim and proper seasoned British theatretroupe and the director is a tyrannous German whowants to "see a little flesh."

Traditionally musicals were performed i n Stratford'sAvon Theatre, which is a regular stage arrangementwith curt:ams and side-wings. Howeve r, Pirates of Penzance is performed. in the Festival Theatre, ie. theatrein-the-round (no curtains). Th:is requires minimalisticsets and creative changes. Of course the under-lyingmovie plot greatly assisted with this. If it's okay tohave a little fun with the script, it's okay to have a littlefun with the set, too.

Pira tes of Penzance was written as a spoof in theplace. It's f1.mny, it's upbea t. Even if you ha te mcals, there is just too much else happening in Pira tconcern yourself in the fact it's a musiG:'l. And, ifhate spoofs, w ell, there' s mo re to it than a spRemember, this is a dynamite rendition, with briladditions to an awesome script that has been a sof the stage for over a hundred years. And the Sford Festival attracts Canada's best talent. They hlot to work with and they used it well.

The greatest weak ness in the orign'lal script wasit ended too quickly. For a plot line that resemblbottomless can of worms, the lid went on awfully Almost so fast that the audience only realized itover when the actors started doing curtain calls.Pirates of Penzance solved that problem withchoreographed non-verbal story lines as the pirpolicemen and daughters of the Major-General cheach other all over the grounds of the Major-Geneestate. Including a little scene with the Pirate Kinbullwhip and a few ideas that might go over welOperat ion Leather Storm.

The play is so upbeat and action-packed, thaextended farewell between Frederick and Mabel sto lag. It is one of the few serious scenes in the and it is almost too much of a change of pace fromambitious level of energy maintained throughouperformance. It is the sort of play where the acfeed off energy from the audience and you leavtheater exhausted; reality isn't quite the s ame as itbefore the play began. It was a standin g ovationfonnance and well deserved. Go see it. It's worth


15/20

The Sandford Fleming Foundation4306 Carl Pollock HaJl, University of WaterlooWaterloo, Ontario, N2L 3G1Waterloo Campus Activities519) 888-4008

Thirteen silver medals were given to students from across the eight branches of engineering. at the May 1994 Convocation.9kdemic '4.cdfence Co-Operative Proftcienc JMichael N. Santos, CIiemiaU'EnjJineerin JEvan C. Bentz. Civil'EnjJineerin JNeil L. Shipp. Computer 'EngineeringMark S. Davis, 'E1ectrical'EnjJineerin JChi Tam Nguyen, t M e c f i a r t i a l [ ~Lowell L. WingerSymms t])esign.Katrin M. Schliewen, (jeowgic4{ EnjJineerin JLyle Strub, Management cienas Option.

Norbert Horvat. I i e m i a U ~Gregory DaRe, i v i l ~Stephen C.w. A u k c t r i a J [ ~Carey W. Mar, 9,{ec umicai EnjJineerin JU-Te Cheng, System.s 'l>lsifJn 'EJlginurilfg

The Ritual of thealling ofan ngineerKim Farwell

rotichemSomeday you are going to get your Iron Ring. Some

of you sooner than others. But with midterms looming(and some lucky folks are already done) even the 4A'sdon't have much time on their hands for rounting thedays to the IRS. Yup yup yup. Great excuse to dressup in funny clothes and drink all day. Hey, I'm notknocking it. I'm impatiently awaiting my own IronRing Stag, and have been since Ibegan the engineeringsojown. Unfortunately with all the hype about the perfect Goodwill outfit, wearing your boxers and getting alittle piece of stainless steel (that's what they use nowadays for your finger, the true reason for the celebrationgets lost behind hideous ties and obnoxious clinking ofrings.

One man had a dream. Professor HE.T. Hultain ofU of T was the luncheon speaker at the Thirty-SixthAnnual Professional Meeting of The Engineering Institute of Canada. He spoke about '''The Romance ofEngineering and the potential for tribal spirit andbrotherhood in this profession. He envisioned something like the Hippocratic Oath of the medical profession; something to bind all engineers to commonunderstanding, no matter where they work or wherethey were educated. Present at this Meeting wereseven past-presidents of the Institute, and they electedto form a committee to act on this proposal. 1his wasJanuary 25, 1922.

The rommittee approached Rudyard Kipling withthis idea. They immediately found ano ther believer.Kipling ,,,rote the Ritual of the Calling of an Engineer;bind ing Engineers to their profession. The ritual is notan oa th, but an Obligation to the profession and to. oneself.

Cold iron of honourable tradition. Iron: strong,hard, but can be made into many things with the righttools and a skilled pair of hands. The hammer, theanvil and the chain. Th ey are a part of the Ritual, theObligation, and the Engineer wears a ring of iron toremind him of his Obligation and of them. Cold iron.But in the hands of an Engineer, it is wann.

The Obligation was first taken on April 25, 1925 atthe University of Montreal by six engineers. It wasrepeated on May 1 in Toronto, obligating fourteenmore engineers. n a letter Rudyard Kipling stated:

The Ceremonies which have taken place rank asAncient Landmarks, since they form the beginning ofwhat, it is to be hoped, will be a permanent and worldwide Ritual. Though he was concerned that thepotency of the ceremony would be lost with time, as heknew that the Seven Past-Presidents would net beavailable to administer the Obligation at all schoolsacross the rountry. So Camps were established. Eachcamp with seven wardens, who themselves wereObligated engineers.

There are 21 Camps across Canada today. EachCamp has seven wardens who administer the Obligation to the graduating engineers from schools withintheir jurisdiction. T he first Camp was established inToronto in 1925. Camp 15 was inaugurated here inWaterloo on September 18, 1%2. Nineteen engineersfrom the Waterloo area were Obligated on March 26,1963. One hundred and five graduating engineerswere Obligated on June 4 of the same year.

The Camps have the responsibility to maintain a certain continuity between ceremonies of different yearsand different locations, though each Camp impartssome of its own traditions. The Iron Ring Stag is a tradition of Camp 15, Waterloo. No one else seems to.have the urge to recycle clothing in that manner. And

each Camp has its own hammer, anvil and chain whichhave their own significance. Camp I, Toronto's anvilwas forged from one of the main pins of the cantileverbridge which once spanned the Reversing Falls in NewBrunswick Part of the chain at Camp 2, Montreal wasused in the erection of I.e Pont du Quebec. The hammer and anvil at Camp 5, Vanrouver were used in theronstructionof the Board's water tunnel. The hammerfrom Camp 8, Winnipeg was presented by a CampWarden, who had received it during his apprenticeshipin EuroIX over fifty years before.

It is ahnost St."\.' nty y 11$ sin()plc wearing aren'tjust a decoration . And when your big day comes,before you have another afternoon beer, -;top and t inbecause you might want to remember the seriou . part,the Ritual. Believe.


16/20

ngineeringSociety Fee ReferenduMichael WorryVPFinance

The Engineering Society provides a wide range ofservices to its members . Unfortunately EngSoc hasbeen faced with rising costs and has had to reduce bu dgeting for many projects we've typically supported forthe benefit of the student body. To better provide to thedemands of our students, we are considering raisingthe Engineering Society Student fee from $10.50 to$14.00. There will be a referendum held this term todetermine student support, and we encourage you tovote yesEngSoc currently provides funding and services for:

C DPOETSFroshWeekPubsAthleticsP"'SRecyclingShadow ProgramSACIron WarriorEngiNewsletter

lison PearsePresidentHiya there every

one Midterms andlabs due dates areapproaching ratherrapidly and I'mthinking that I wouldlike to be climbingbig rocks or swim

ming vast lakes or even just vegging with a cold bever-age beside a kiddie pool (anything but work) for therest of the summer. Anyone interested in joining me ...bonus points if you own a climbing rope

A thought for some of the upper year c1asses (thatmeans anyone 2A and above ), how about getting toknow the younger classes in your department? Throwa party, have a barbecue, arrange something for yourclass and others in your department and bond. Bonding isgoocl

The Iron Warrior is looking for help soliciting advertising revenue for the paper. Ifanyone is interested in making somemoney for themselves and for thepaper, please contact Kim Farwell, theIron Warrior Editor. If there are anylocal businesses that you patronizefrequently, ask them if they willadvertise in the IW. Get involvedand make some cash at the sametime, this oppourtunitydoesn't come along every

dayCome on out for awe

some food in CPH, onTuesdays and Thursdays

Betty - Orifice5ecretaIyCourse CritiquesOld Midterms & FinalsSemi-FormalEng WeekTake Some NewsThe TOOLPhotocopiersDarkroomNoveltiesCanada DayFrontrunnersSpecial EventsSandford FlemingWatpubs

This fee increase would allow the following improvements:

Restoring EngSoc support to reduced budgets andre-establishing our backup fund. Better prizes for Athletics, P >5 and Special Events

More POETS Pubs More socialevents Funding for fenced in POETS Patio Expanding Orifice computing facilities EngSoc History Display Trophy Case

Concrete Toboggan sells burgers and sausages onPOETS Patio and on Friday at lunch time Grad Commwill be selling Fed Pizza for the low low price of $1 .50 aslice (bigger and better tasting thanGinos ).

Thanks to the Social Directors Dragana Beara andStephan Schweighofer for treating us to two ends ofthe social spectrum; road trips to enjoy Pirates of Penzance at the Stratford Festival and to the BrunswickHouse in Toronto. A fun timewas had by all There issomething going on for everyone, so make sure yourc1ass reps are keeping your c1ass informed of events.Thanks also to Ton y Franceljand Florijan Papa (ourAthletics Directors) for nmning the Mudbowl on Sunday. There were no serious injuries (that I've heard of... ), it was an awesome day and ... Erotichem 4AChemical) won What more could you want?

On Saturday, the rts Boar was sited in front of theModem Languages Building, adorned with the Engineering Logo, as well as purple gauze and pink satinribbons (brings a picture to mind doesn't it?). The Boaris being fixed there permanently (in concrete), so that it

doesn't go missing again The Boar usedto sit in the foyer of the Modem lan

guages Building. It was known todisappear and then reappear infront of P.o.E.T.s. on a number ofoccasions aguess it was fond ofus and can you bla me it?). fewyears ago in went into storage, tobe brought out again for penna-

nent siting when a location wasdecided. Anyway, the whole pur

pose of our being at this ceremonywas to pledge to be the defenders of the

Boar thanks to everyone that came outand helped make our presence felt (youcouldn't miss us), and to Bill Baer for

Provide funding for capital purcllaSes onext five years

Increase our influence as a society ableStudent Engineers' viewpointsThere are many events that Engineerin

the past, that typically break even, but whesitant to hold now because budgetaryleave little margin for the unexpected. It iforecast what capital expenditures will arnext five years- for example if the C expanding, the POETS big screen TV brokIron Warrior needed new equipment. Curis no funding available for when such need

Note that the EngSoc fee has not raisein 1988 it was raised from $8.50 to its cuMany EngSoc activities such as the C&D, ISemi-Formal, and other social events areservices and are budgeted to break evenincrease is not approved we will be forced sources of income- raising C D and novcharging more for social events, athletics eall the things we DON'T want to do So pleto continue to expand our EngSoc activitiereferendum occurs later this term, vote yeFee Increase

working with m e to organize our part of thThe Federation of Students is nmning a

please send submissions to the Feds in tCenterfor big prizes (250 big ones I believe

o m ~ events that are coming up quicklyto be missed are the Off-Ring Road ClassOperation Leather Storm Guly 8), free mTuesday night in P.O.E.T.s., a road tripWonderland Guly IS) the list goes on, cendar in the Orifice or the White BoaP.o.E.T.S. formore information


17/20

T e eds pew ig Ch n svvey Peters

Sr Officer Internal ffairsHey allThis is kind of a new thing for the Feds, but Kimassures me that wi th ptactice, the Feels will be able to

spew with the bestof them. So here goes ..PREZSTIJFF

Stephen C is pretty comfy in his new surroundingsup at the Fed office ..we're trying not to be too roughon him until he learns the ropes. Drop by and see himsometime. He's got a couple of big things on the goright now, including the cooperative Feds-GSA campaign to protest the elimination of OHIP benefits forinternational students. Petitions are circulating aroundcampus .. dropby the Orifice if you' d like to sign.

The Council of Ontario Universities has approved aplan that will offer benefits to international students;the p lan offerssimilar coverage to t hat ofOHIP (physicians and hospital care) and is carried by Blue Cross.

The cost to International Students will be $496 ingle,$1,013 for two, and $1,570 for a family of three or more.like everything else these days, these prices are subjectto 8retail sales tax.

Stephen isalso looking for undergradua te students tosit on the Student Services Advi ory Committee(SSAC); SSAC reviews student services supported byancillary and/or tuition-related fees. There/s a tudentmajority on this 11 member committee, which meansthe student vote can make a big difference. I fyou haveany questions about SSAC, please contact Stephen atx2478 or at fedpres@watservl.

Stephen's cohort Dave (Academic Affairs honcho)has some stuff in the works too there's a co-op reception at Fed Hall on June 27th at 4:30 pm Hence, beingco-op students, all engineers are invited. And try yourluck at FrisbeeGolf to win some great prizes there's atournament being held on July 22. For more info, callDave at x2 34O or e-mail [email protected]

Christine and I are working on a communications survey, to find out how students find outabout "stuff" on campus. New ideas for communicating are a "Students' Comer" (a la CITY 1V),and some programming on Rogers Cable. Youshould be hearing more about all of this later thisterm. We're also trying to improve communication between all the different student groups oncampus, by way of resoun:e handbooks for s0cieties, clubs and services. Those should be available next month.

And the Feels are holding a contest to come upwith a new logo for the organization: we're looking for something that reflects the Feels commit-

Michae l Wor ryVP F inanceHel los f r om t he l a n d o f budge t s , t axes

a n d l a te nights in t h e Orif ice . I on ' t saym u c h here , b u t p lease r e a d m y ar t ic les o nt he changes to t he C & D a n d t he E n g S o cFee. f y o u h a v e a n y ques t ions a s to h oE n g i n e e r i n g s p e n d s t he i r m o n e y , m yb o o k s are o p e n to t he Society . Yve spen t al o n g t i : rne o r g a n i z i n g t h e m f r o m t he ,

L---...::...... .... un:unrn , i ncom pl e t e , s t a t e t h e y e r e lef tin.

O t h e r t h a n t h a t , I e n c o u r a g e a l l E n g i n e e r s t o b e c o m ei nvo l ved '\ Vith t he Society . Jus t s t i ck y o u r h e a d i n t h e Ori f i ceo n c e in a hUe a n d s ee ha t ' s happen i ng . The r e a r e al ayslo ts o f p laces for energet ic peop l e - you ' l l l e a r n s tuf f ou t s i deo f class t ha t you ' l l actua l ly u s e in rea l life, deve l op va l uab l econtac ts a n d i t l ooks gr ea t o n a resUIne

ment to students, our long history as an independenorganization, our service-oriented nature, our 4.3 milion corpotate status, and the fact that we ' re here tmake a difference. So, if you think you can express thain a great new logo to go with our new exec. and ounew building, then submit your design on 8.5" 11" tthe Fed Office (CC 235) along with tl1e contest entrfum1 (availableat th office) ..

AND YOU COULD WlN $250...could come in handy, don't you think?

VPUASTUFF

Julie and Karin (Student Issues guru are studyinsexual harassment among tudents. Policy 33 of thUniversity (dealing witl, sexual harassment) is undergoing revisions, 311d we're trying to make sure students have tl1eir say. I f you have had an experiencwith sexual harassment either on campus, or on a c0op placement, Julie and Karin would like to make thUniversity aware that sexual harassment is happeninto students. Please either drop by and talk tJulie/Karin, or drop off an anonymous letter explaining your concerns and your experience. Both womehave mailboxes in the Fed office, or can be reached afedvpua@Watservl.

And PAL.S. (Peer Assistance Links Service) is upand running again for the sum mer, on shorLenehours: call on- W"S 7-1 PSo there you have it the fIrSt Fed "Spew" of thterm. That just about covers what we're up to thesdays .. and if you have any questions, or anythinremarkable and insightful to share, feel free to calx6331 or e-mail me at fedintm@Watservl.

f l ~ Birthday to The. TOOL


18/20

Dave ThompsonVP/nternalhehehe. What it

is, MamaL.BlatDere, ah spewed .O.K., so s dere smo e where datcame fum, butinstead I l l plumfake it here on dis

page. What it is, Mama What s cornin' down ya' mayax' yo'self, 0 ya' may be wonderin' whut ya' missed.Sheeit,let me try t'fill ya' in. 'S coo', bro ..

De roadtrip t'Stratfo'd t'see Pirates uh Penzance,some humo ous tale uh sin'in' pirates and deir foibles,wuz enjoyed by all who went, 'sept dose ova' 5 6/1. Deshow wuz quite enjoyable, but da damn seatin' leftsump n t be desired . It seems as dough Systems folksare da damn only ones who appreciate some little culture in deir lives, but dey ve always been some littledifferent

Engweek wuz held right afta' de long weekend.Dose who participated had some most enjoyable time,swimmin' in inflatable pools, goin' on booze gun ram-pages, and doin' oda liquid related events. But no onecame out t drow sponges at me. What it is, Mama ahstayed dry, despite Ky le's best effo'ts.

Kyle, now dere wuz some wet individual, but dat'sanoda'sto'y,rightG.P.?

s ah scribble dis, de Bnmswick House Road Tripbe approachin fast. I'll downdate ya later. Ah bebaaad

What it is, MamaOpuh shun l..eada' Sto mbe approachin' fast ..but it's

top secret.If youse goin' t be around on Canada Day, 0 need

an 'suse not t'visit yo significantoder s grandparents, mosey on down and see Vid

dIes 0 Matt in de Orifice. What it is, Mama Dey arelookin' fo' sucka's to help out wid de festivities. ah'dink ya' may even git some nifty t-shirt and some weeparty drown in fo' baaaad measho' nuff. Details t'follow, 0 rap t'ViddIes and Matt

later. Ahbebaaad ...De Brunswick House Roadtrip gots back not toolong ago, and ah gots'ta finish dis befo'e dey'lllet me sleep. ah dink dat all 'Bomba' staff should betralned at da damn Brunny. Slap rnah fro Po 'esampIe, Mario, to indicate dat he wuz finished wid hispitcher, put it on top uh his haid. Various odersoomenced t drow peanuts into it De co red responsefum de bounca' (really big-ass guy) wuz '18 dat somehint?/I We wuz all real impressed wid his panache,and not bein' used t'reasonable bouncers, wuz quiteswprised. Needless t'say, all had some great time.What it is, Mama Cheap drinks, free peanuts, andbaaaad beat make da damn weekend go ..smoodly.Slap mah. fro

If ya' aint al ready noticed, dis place called da damnOrifice be a real impo tant place fo' engineers. It skinda likes de Batcave. What it is, Marna If ya' wannaknow sump n, 0 are plum lookin fo' a cool placet'hang out, check it out We even gots our own fountuh knowledge ( plum likes de Batclunker), Betty, and ifshe duzn t know it ya' kin always count on Mario deOrifice Denizen fo' an endless source uh uselessinfo mashun about greaser Soccer. Ah be baaad ..And, den dere s us, de Exec. Remember, we re slowmovin' and easily tempte d by Gyros.: De only 'suse fo' havin' foe wheels, be havin twobikes.

Claire AndersonVP-ExternalI would like to thank everyone who

applied to attend the FSSCO AGM conference in Ottawa. Unfortunately, wedon t have enough space (translation: $) totake everybody. Those attending will be:Jason Wood (4A Chern), Jennifer Smith(2B Geo) and Mario Bellabarba 3A Civil)and me I would like to take this opportu- ' - - _ L _nity to encourage you all to apply for the conferences that cometerm. I will by to inform you of them through my spews and ameetings, but please feel free to ask me about what is avaiJable at a

Planning is under way for the 1994-95 Bridging The Gap I..ectuFor those of you who aren t familiar with this program, it is a serielectures given from September to March co-sponsored by the EnSociety, The Dean of Engineering and the Centre for Society, Teand Values. The purpose of the series is to provide engineeringwith exposure to an assortment of non-technical issues. Currentlypotential speakers is being assembled. Suggestions of topics foand/or speakers are welcomed.Please direct all suggestions to me.

Canada Day is quickly approaching and Viddlesand Matt are working hard to put together

EngSoc's contribution to the events at Columbia lake. Traditionally, engineering students nm the "Kiddie Olympics" - games and activities for the children in attendance. The Olympics are held in the afternoon, followed byfireworks in the evening and then a get-together for all the volunteers (freeBEvERages will be avaiJable). Also, all those that volunteer receive a Tshirt, free lunch and other cool stuff: If you don t have plans for the longweekend yet,stick around and join us at Columbia lake, its a BLASf (andI almost forgot, all participan ts receive tons 0 P"'S points).

Lastly, the co-chair for the 1996 Canadian Congress of Engineering hasbeen chosen (this is the conference that we will be hosting in 1996). AmyMcC1everty 3A SO) will be EngSoc B's chairperson for this HUGE eventAmy has already got some great ideas on the go and I know she will doan awesome job. s this event will be so Iarge, she will need help of all . . . . i I I ikinds in order for it to be a success. There will be an organizationalmeeting in the near future for those that are interested in being a partof his inCredible event. For more information, talk to me or Amy.

Peter RoschkeEndowment DirectorJust a quick reminder to everyone that the WEEF proposal deadlin

day June 13. If you know of any undergraduate lab / project / org anithat could use some extra funding, talk to your WEEF rep or get a propfrom the Orifice.

I also want to thank all of you out there that supported the WEEFthrough the VSC. I know that tuition has been rising for the past few

-------------- that some of you are struggling to make ends meet - your commitmeuniversity is phenomenal


19/20

Feed MelarkEveryone else is spewing 1tlis

issue, so I may as well add mytwo cents. But Iwish it was more

Womyn Can t SpellKim FarwellEditor

'Womyn." My spell check doesn't accept it Not that I use that to gauge anything. My spchecker is American and doesn't except things like neighbour ( pelled with a ''u''). 'Womyn" isin my dictionary. The closest I can come, in fad, is: women. The plural fonn of the female gendof the Homo Sapiens sapiens species.

So what 's the deal here? I have been infonned that "womyn" refers to a group of the above whobject to association with the root "men". Give me a break. So are you femayle as well? Tspelling of a word proves nothing. If women can't get beyond the mere spelling of their gendtitle we have a lot farther to go than we think.

What's wrong with men? What's wrong with being associated with men? I like men. I evlove some of them. Naomi Wolf wrote a wonderful article in the May issue of Cosmopolitan title"Can you be a Feminist and Love Men too?" Until I read tllis article, r had trouble associatimyself with the feminist movement. I support the fundamentals of feminism, but there are tmany radical ideas that rsimply disagree with. 'Womyn" is on of tllem. I don't understand ilconcept

Men are not to blame for ilie situation women are in today. They are only guilty of mimickinilieir role models (who, of course, mimicked theirs). We go all the way back to prehistory when wlived in QlVes. Darwinian theory prevailed; survival of the fittest. To put it bluntly, women whhunted didn't make very good mothers. Hardships were many. Children didn't survive. Anremember that due to poorer diets women matured later and lived only about 34 years so the clUbearing period was relatively short. To maintain tribal population, women had to be pregnantnursing most of the time. Obviously, hunt ing fell to the men.Now that day to day survival is no longer a concern, and modern medicine keeps more clUldralive women have ilie opportunity to expand from being population-producers, to pursue oilinterests and contribute to the development of society in other ways. This is a wonderful exampof ilie social level our race has achieved.

So, why do omyn seem intent on alienating men? As women's roles change, men's roles aforced to change too. This is easier if men understand and support the new roles for botll sexeWhat this means is that instead of alienating men, we need to edUQlte them. Even though 51the world's population is female, men are still better edUQlted, have more employable skills ancontrol more of ilie world's resources and finances tl1an women. Doesn't it make sense to havnoULsid ?

Women also have to reconsider their expectations. We are trying to change roles that bave bein place for tens of thousands of years. We are doing it bef-Termparty that single-handedly set Engineering back about fifteen years . This party involved dragging femalecolleagues up on stage to give 1tlem awards for various physical attributes . You know what I mean . I

1hought we were well beyond that. It s about time that we took our reputation seriously ,since Engineering isa professional degree program . MUN gets a Big Red Bite for that one .Just gotta Say 1tlanks for 1tle loads of submissions 1tlis issue. Keep it up. I ove it. However, pleasesubmit stuff on diskette with NO FORMADING. I repeat: NO FORMA ING . Otherwise Ihave to

unformat it before I transfer it into 1tle Mac ,and I m not very careful about reformatting it 1tle way you wanted.If you want special formatting for a word or phrase or whatever, ry (bold) 1tlis,and it will tum out like this.And whoever left those cookies in my box, they were yummy. They were my dinner on Saturday. Oh ,1heyweren'tforme? Well, they were really yummy. Thanks.


20/20

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