the greifenburg
TRANSCRIPT
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The GreifenBurg
A medieval Romance from the ‘Bayko Baron’
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• Graf Arnulf Von Griefen takes the evening air with his latest acquisition – the Gravina Gunhilde-Ermingarde-Brunnhilde-Gretchen-Hildegarde-Marlene Von OhneKinn (known to the weary as ‘Lotte’).
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• The Griefenburg, once a byzantine fortress, taken by the Norman Sicilian Hardouin Grossteste – later lost in a regrettable after-feast game of Russian Roulette using crossbows – today the lair of the most infamous of the Dalmatian robber barons.
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• The Austrian Margrave Herman Von Kinnlos, (Herman the German), sends his heralds to enquire after the well-being of Schnitzel, his favourite horse - which his niece happened to be riding when abducted. Graf Arnulf sends his jester in reply.
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• Faced with a ransom of 20,000 bezants for the mare, the Margrave decides to send for his direct negotiation team – here the wagons carrying his siege train file through the narrow streets of Schnurt
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• Graf Arnulf retaliates by drawing his bridge and cutting away the
pontoon causeway before expending one of his precious supply of snooks – cocking it at the fuming Margrave.
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• Dramatic irony – the Margrave uses the abandoned pontoons to bring his siege tower up.
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• A horde of archers and arbalestier backed up by the trebuchet deliver a storm of missiles to keep the defenders off the walls.
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• The moment of truth – Graf Arnulf stands to meet the assault, Rolf, his trusty squire, polishes his great sword, Gladys, ready for the slaughter.
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• Towering tragedy – with its bridge already lowered and laden with warriors, the tower ran over a loose plank, lost a wheel and over-balanced, destroying the
support boat in the process and sending several score of the Margrave’s best men to the bottom in their armour.
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• Graf Arnulf celebrates the miracle, with an unexpected companion – cupid, it seems, slipped an arrow in among all the rest.
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• Overcome by an unexpected bout of chivalry Graf Arnulf challenges the
Margrave to tourney – for the hand of the Grafina Gunhilde-Ermingarde-Brunnhilde-Gr……… Lotte!
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• Yesterday they were dire enemies, but today they are trying to skewer each other in valorous comradeship – medieval chivalry at its best.
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• The knights of Greifenburg return home with their trophies
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• The Graf Arnulf carries his winnings over the threshold and sends for his priests – the ransom for the now captive Margrave Herman will pay for the wedding celebrations.