Thank God I'm Bald

By: LAURA DUKSTA

Presented By: Jeff Sohler

© 2008 - 2009 Thank God I...®. All Rights Reserved.

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INTRODUCTION

by John Castagnini

IMPORTANT...Please Do Not Skip This Section!

Why this ebook? What makes it so different? Not onlyare these answers important, they are integral to yourunderstanding of the story presented here. Please donot skip over this brief introduction in your eagernessto get to the meat of the ebook itself.

When I first thought to include Thank God I WasRaped as one of the stories for Thank God I...™ Volume1, the concept sent chills through my spine. Couldanyone who’s endured this brutal, horrifying experiencereally embrace these words? Over the years, I’veconsulted with countless women during their raperecovery. I chose the title after witnessing whattranspires for them when they come to this conclusionof gratitude. What became quite apparent over acourse of thousands upon thousands of conversationsis that we only evolve past the mental traum a fromsuch a happening when we can hold “the love for it inour hearts”

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What is meant by “God”?

God — Certainly, the biggest three-letter word evercreated. Grand Organized Designer best describes theGod referred to in the Thank God I...™ books, websiteeducational material and seminars.

The thousands of people sharing their stories in thisseries all perceive God in their own light. Thank GodI...™ is about this network of people, willing to movebeyond having the right “name” for God.

Even the word “God” itself cannot finite the infinite.Rather, God refers to a system governing the brillianceof what is, and is not.

What this book series is not supposed to be.

This series does not condone or promote any of theacts the writers have experienced, nor do we suggestin any way that anyone should either commit any ofthese acts or subject themselves to any of these acts.This series also does not promote or label any specifickind of behavior as “right” or “wrong”, nor were the storieswritten or the book published for the purpose ofsuggesting that anyone rationalize their actions orbehavior.

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In addition, the Thank God I...™ series does not promoteor deny any religion. Rather, it honors the existence ofreligion and all things as part of a perfect creation.

What is Thank God I...™ about?

Our intention with this series is to convey this one keyprinciple: Perfection permeates everything. Each timewe fail to recognize this principle, the next lesson tocome our way will once again offer us the opportunityto see the perfection and break through into freedom.In fact, finding perfection in the pain and pleasure ofour own personal tribulations is the only way we willever liberate ourselves from the bondage of patterns.Whether it comes in a day, a year, or a lifetime away,situations will come into our lives that will force us tobecome thankful for “what was,” and to whole-heartedlyexperience “what is.”

What is meant by “Thanking God”?

During the creation phase of this series, we werefortunate to have as our ever-efficient assistant,Cassandra Gatzow, a beautiful twenty-three-year-oldwriter and poet. Just prior to coming to work with us,Cassandra was diagnosed with cervical cancer. A littleover a year and a half later, the cancer spread and sheleft this world before the first book launched.

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After Cassandra passed, my heart was struck by thewords she put to the page as she endured thisexperience. She wrote of her earth angels and herexplorations as she left her body to “dance with herangels.” She did not write about her passing, she wroteabout Thank God I...™ living as she moved through herlife’s greatest test, and her life’s ending. She viewedeach person, each moment as precious. How fortunateshe was, to see God in the now.

Imagine — this is what she wrote about her cancer:

“Tears fill my eyes daily with gratitude for every momentand every breath. It has allowed me to go after mydreams, to live from my heart, and to be truly free. Ithank God for my cancer and for allowing me to reacha place in me that I don’t think would have beenpossible without this experience. I am now twenty-three and feel that I have stepped into my skin proudly.I have felt an inner peace that many don’t find until laterin life. I am truly grateful for all my earth angels andwant to thank them for sharing with me this wonderfuljourney”

...Cassandra

There are 4 million tasks to accomplish in order tobring the Thank God I...™ network to the standard of ourvision. Thank you, Cassandra, for reminding me why

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Thank God I...™ was conceived in the first place.

Thanking God is about the above. Not just what isabove this sentence; it is about what is above, guidingus at every moment. Beyond the pain, chaos, andconfusion of our circumstance exists true perfection.Thanking God is about finding this perfection. Thisplace of thanking God might seem nearly impossible tofind, but it is the only place we will find ourselves.

Thank God I...™ is true “gratitude”.

Sure, we all hear about the “good things” that people aregrateful for in their lives. But, is this gratitude? ThankGod I...™ gratitude is about a state of being. It is about astate of inspiration, non-judgment, and presence.Thank God I...™ gratitude is beyond the illusion ofpositive or negative. It is beyond the lies of “good” and“evil”. Thank God I...™ . gratitude is about finding God inevery word, thought, and deed. In spirit, we are beyondthe illusion of pain or pleasure and we are present withspirit. Thank God I...™ gratitude is about equal love forall that is, as it is, was, or ever shall become. Gratitudeis loving what we don’t “like” as much as loving what wedo “like”.

The diversity of authors and experiences

The intention of this series is to reach all of humanity,

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every single unique creation. We did not base theselection of contributions to this series upon any faithor religious orientation. Each selected author took aformer challenge into their heart. The diversity ofauthors spans religions, countries, professions, age,race, nationality, and definitely experiences. Theyrange from strippers to doctors, from politicians to stay-at-home moms, and whoever they are, gratitude rules.From alcoholism to molestation or rape, the law ofgratitude prevails with each of our authors.Thankfulness for whatever is, or is not, ultimately rulesevery one of our kingdoms.

The vision of Thank God I...™

Little did I imagine how lightning-fast Thank God I...™would circle the world. This network includesthousands of contributors, reaching millions of people,sharing not only their stories, but also their answers!Beyond the books, and the online community, we offerworldwide conference calls, workshops, and seminars!The vision of this series will provide everyone withinspecific communities information in order to evolvepast the emotions that are holding them back. Thepeople and the project are revolutionary.

“All things in nature proceed from certain necessity andwith the utmost perfection.”

...Baruch Spinoza

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Thank God

I'm Bald

LAURA DUKSTA

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Around the age of eight or nine, I clearly rememberlearning two lessons in Sunday school that woulddirect the course of my life. Firstly, Jesus taught thatwe are all brothers and sisters; and secondly, becauseof that we should love each other. Though I credit andthank my Catholic catechism classes for these nuggetsof wisdom, it was clear to me, even at this young age,that these lessons were preached but not necessarilypracticed.

I knew that I was meant to one day travel the world,meet my brothers and sisters, and spread the messageof love. As my beloved mentor, John Demartini, says,life is a lot like a slingshot. I found the truth of this, andknow that a mission of this magnitude will create a lotof tension. The further you are pulled back in life, thegreater your ability to propel. Unfortunately, in life, aswith a slingshot, sometimes you're pulled way backand you drop out instead of soaring. Who knew that inorder to successfully fulfill this mission, I would gothrough the experience of losing my hair to a conditioncalled Alopecia Areata Alopecia Areata is stresstriggered, and I was "blessed" with somevery stressful situations from verbal, emotional,physical, and even sexual abuse, coupled with atraumatic move in the fourth grade that took me awayfrom my ocean side home to the country.

At the age of eleven, I lost all of my long brown, wavy

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hair. It began with a small, nickel-sized patch on theback right corner of my scalp. Though I now had thisodd, very smooth patch, it was easy enough toconceal, and I just hoped that it would go away. Itdidn't, though... in fact, over the next six months myhair fell out to the point that I became an eleven-year-old girl with a really bad comb-over! The situation wasanything but funny. I didn't know what to do. I wasscared, embarrassed, confused. Friends and familydidn't know what to say, or how to help. And for themost part, neither did the doctors. Once I finallyreceived the diagnosis of Alopecia Areata, the advicefrom a Boston Children's Hospital doctor was, There isreally nothing we can do. Get her a wig, and no oneneeds to know. These words still ring in my mother'sears. She knew this was terrible advice and that thingslike this should be talked about. She tried to force usinto family therapy, but faced incredible resistance fromme and from my father, who at that time was a ragingalcoholic.

Finally, she settled for the doctor's advice. I got a wig,skipped a couple of days of school, and went backpretending nothing ever happened. I thought I wasacting the same, and didn't realize at the time that Iwas becoming introverted, miserable, and distrustful oflife.

I believed this to be the worst thing that could ever

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happen. I felt there was something wrong with me andthat no one would want to be my friend. I believed Iwould never have a boyfriend or be able to do all thethings I dreamed of doing. I loved to sing and perform,but I stopped. I quit gymnastics, swimming, and goingon roller coasters -- situations that might cause my wigto move on my head or fall off. I became someone whowatched life rather than participate in it. I withdrewdeeper and deeper into an undiagnosed depression. Icompletely shut down.

Now, I want you to know that I wasn't having a pityparty. Early on, I realized that there were worse thingsthat could have happened to me. I wasn't sick, hadn'tlost a limb or the use of one of my senses. There weremuch worse fates than going bald, and I knew it. In myteens my sense of compassion and understanding forothers expanded. I could, to some degree, put myselfin the shoes of others experiencing challenges in theirown lives. My ability to love expanded. People oftensay that you cannot love others until you learn to loveyourself.

Well, I guess there are exceptions to most every rule. Ichampioned so many other causes and people before Icould even begin to think about loving myself. In highschool I became an activist against racism... I did notunderstand how people could discriminate againstothers just because of the color of their skin! This

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continued in college, where I earned a minor in African-American studies, and became an advocate forwomen's rights. My degree in sociology allowed me toexplore the patterns of society and human behavior,which I found fascinating.

Did I mention I was introverted, withdrawn, andashamed of my own existence? I was now in college,and I had never seen myself bald. Yes -- in ten yearsof wearing a wig, from age eleven until age twenty-one,I never looked at myself in a mirror without the wig on! Idated a guy for almost two years in high school, andwe never spoke about it. Talk about denial! It wasn'tuntil my fourth year of college that I looked at myselfwigless in the mirror. I dated a guy who asked if hecould see me without my wig on, and I agreed. I criedfor what seemed like hours in his arms, and only thendid I move over and look at myself in a mirror. I'll neverforget that moment. I remember saying to myself,Crap... it's not so bad... now what am I supposed to do?

I'm not sure what kind of scary monster I wasexpecting to see.... Still, I put my wig back on and wentback to hiding out. I became a little more comfortabletalking about my baldness during my college years withmy friends, but I still hesitated to raise my hand inclass, not wanting to draw attention to myself. I oftendodged questions like How do you keep your hair sostraight? by answering "Just a lot of hair

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spray."

It was a miserable time of lying and denial. From ayoung age, I drank heavily, trying to avoid the staresand the feelings of inadequacy I felt. After graduatingfrom college, I moved to South Beach, a trendy part ofMiami, and bartended in a world where many otherswere trying to escape from reality as well. My heavydrinking continued, and I added drugs, like ecstasy andacid, to the mix. I had no self-esteem, and throughthese drugs, believed I could experience a sense ofbelonging. Since everything serves some purpose --and yes, the drugs were certainly detrimental to myhealth and safety with the potential to get me into a lotof trouble, -- I also experienced a sense of love andacceptance for myself and others that I didn't knowexisted.

After a while, by the grace of God, I realized that Icould get to this place without the use of theseunhealthy and artificial "helpers". I couldcreate this love and one-ness through other means.This brought a new chapter to my spiritual path.Actually, my path veered one night when I foundmyself praying for my sister. She was a very youngmother now pregnant with her second child and havingproblems with her husband. As I prayed, somethingclearly answered me and said, Your sister is fine. Prayfor your nephew. I acknowledged that this was strange,

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but as I did, the whole idea for a children's book aboutlove flooded my mind. It became one of those ideasthat I just knew I had to make happen.

I bartended for six years and had no idea how totransition into being an author. Several months afterThe Prayer, I was on the cusp of turning thirty. Justweeks before my birthday, I told my friends, Throw mea party. I have an announcement to make! We chosea nightclub called Life in New York City, and in July of1998, I had what has now become known as myComing Out Party as The Bald Chick.

Wow... I had no idea that the prayer and the idea for ILove You More were the catalyst for this unexpectedunveiling of my head. Now, looking back, I can seehow consumed my life had become with the fact that Iwore a wig... were people wondering... when and howshould I tell someone... was it going to fall off ifsomeone put their arm around me unexpectedly...yikes!

Though it took much adjustment for my new life as TheBald Chick, I also experienced an incredible sense offreedom. A weight had literally been lifted off myshoulders! I came upon Wayne Dyer speaking on TV,which led me to the teachings of Emerson, Troward,Thoreau, Science of Mind, Unity, Landmark, andultimately to Dr. John Demartini. I reconnected with my

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childhood desire to travel the world, meet my brothersand sisters, and spread the message of love. I realizedthat I could do this through writing and publishing myfirst book, I Love You More. It's amazing to look backon my life now and know that everything thathappened, all the abuse, trauma, and neglect, bothfrom others and self-imposed, was a catalyst for me tolearn to love others more fully. For me the biggestlesson was learning to love myself and allowing othersto love me.

I now know that our biggest challenges become ourbiggest blessings when we are willing to embrace thegifts they present to us. I would never trade having myhair for this life experience. Not only did it teach melessons of love, understanding, and compassion forhumanity, but it now allows me the opportunity to gointo schools and share with young people one of themost simple yet powerful lessons... Just Be Yourself.It's one of those very simple though not necessarilyeasy lessons, one that I think we often spend ourwhole life learning to embrace. Also... I'll let you in on alittle secret: As an author, being bald makes me bothmemorable and marketable. Talk about comingcompletely full circle!

But seriously, when I share with people the true powerand freedom that comes from learning to love oneself,these are not just empty words. I am a living

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expression of this truth. I have a program now that Ibring into schools titled Self-Esteem Through Love:Empowering Our Children to Shine. I am able to sharewith young people and adults universal truths that Ihave reawakened to and implemented along thisjourney of self-discovery. Coming from a powerful, baldwoman standing in front of them, they hear the lessonsat a deeper level than they might if coming from ateacher, parent, or guidance counselor.

One of my favorite verses from John Keats's poemOde on a Grecian Urn says, Beauty is truth, truthbeauty that is all ye know on earth, and all ye need toknow. When I read these words shortly after choosingto shed my wigs and become The Bald Chick, theyresonated throughout my soul. What I didn't know wasthat, by embracing my truth, bald head and all, mybeauty would shine through. The world agreesbecause I cannot count the times I am told, over andover again, often by total strangers, how beautiful I am.I know this is the outcome of learning to not only bemyself but to love myself as well. My light and beautynow beam from within. It also doesn't hurt to havenamed my company I Shine, Inc. I tell people thatwhen I answer my phone all day, Hello, I Shine, this isLaura. How can help you I can't help but glow!

I now get to fulfill my mission of generating theconversation of love around the world and am

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committed to doing so with my company, I Shine, Inc.,through books, music, speaking, TV, film, and the web.Thank you, God, for allowing me the opportunity toplay such a big game this time around! I am a livingexample that when people realize that they are loved...anything is possible! Thank God I am bald... I can'timagine my life without this experience and the blessedopportunity to spread, live, and embody the messagesof love, beauty, truth, gratitude, and courage!

Laura Duksta is president of I Shine, Inc. and best-selling author of I Love You More, (BookSense winterpick for 2007-2008) endorsed by Wayne Dyer, JohnDemartini, Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, andAlan Cohen. She has been featured in numerousmedia publications including USA Today, NBC 6, TheSun-Sentinel, Miami Herald and Boca Magazine. Asought-after speaker, she's presented her programs tothousands of students, parents, educators, authors,charitable organizations, and entrepreneursnationwide, including to Gilda's Club, the JuvenileDiabetes Foundation, New School network marketing(Xango), as well as dozens of schools and communitygroups. She has committed her life to making the worlda brighter place by empowering people to shine! Youcan contact Laura at Laura@LauraDuksta.com or visitwww.MySpace.com/ ILoveYouMoreBookTour. Herbook I Love You More is available fromSourcebooks/Jabberwocky, at Amazon, and at all other

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major and independent book stores and gift galleriesacross the country.

Join the Thank God I…™ Community online to shareyour story and chat with the Thank God I…™ Authors.

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