Poolscene plus

Design A1rusco

SUPPLIERS OF

RILEYTM

Superleague

TOURNAMENT

APPROVED

POOL TABLES

INDEPENDENT

SUPPLIERS OF ALL

ENTERTAINMENT &

LEISURE

MACHINES THROUGHOUT

THE SOUTH OF ENGLAND

FREE PHONE 0800 092 333 4

E-MAIL: SERVICE@MERIDIANLEISURE.CO.UK

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New Format Free – Please Take One

Issue 38 December 2002

Design A1rusco

1

Contents (Alphabetical index of regular features)

Page

Averages 15

A Word from the Chairman 20

Clash of the Month 10

Crossword 16

Crossword Solution 21

Diary 26

Div 1 Details 7

Div 2 Details 9

Div 3 Details 11

Down Memory Lane 10

Ed Sez 3

Eight Ballers 22

Fines - Late Scorecards / Missed Meetings 21

For Sale 17

Free Pool 21

Gig Guide 24

Ladies K.O. -

League Doubles K.O. -

League Singles K.O. 8

League Tables 7,9,11

League Team K.O. 5

Outstanding Debts 8

Outstanding Matches / Missing Results 21

Referee 13,14

Secretary’s Comments 4

Sponsors 18

Tommy ‘8-Ball’ Tucker 25

Useful Contact Numbers 26

26

Diary

League Singles K.O. Stge 1 Mon 13th

Jan

Paying-in-meeting Wed 5th

Feb

Next Issue

POOLSCENE Plus is published monthly and is available on the

first Wednesday of each month.

Useful Contact Numbers

League Chairman & Russ Matthews (01225) 769605

POOLSCENE Editor (07831) 830038

League Secretary Paul Doolan (Dooley) (01225) 752716

(07813) 380396

Treasurer Barry Moss (01225) 761639

Rules Secretary Tim Hobbs (07812) 165873

Dursley Arms Harry or Di (01225) 752089

All League Venues See Fixture List or appropriate page of this book.

Design A1rusco

25

The Dursley Arms, Trowbridge 752089

Live Music Every Saturday

Real Ale

Premium Lager

Beer Garden

Free Pool on Wednesdays

Darts

Gigs

Fri 6th Dec Acoustic Night

Sat 7th Dec Skeeters

Sat 14th Dec De Moff’s

Sat 21st Dec Smokin’

Fri 27th Dec Russ Matthews

Sat 28th Dec Mutley

Tommy ‘8-Ball’ Tucker

Tommy says, “ Av bin practicin’ me

8-ballers me. Am doin’ it abart once in

every five attempts now lad. Not a bad

avridge eh ? Must werk on pottin’

seven colours in a row first now though!

2

TUESDAY NIGHT SPECIAL AT

TTHHEE JJOOHHNN BBUULLLL Westfield Rd, Studley Green

Trowbridge (01225) 775612

2 x 8oz Rump Steaks

Onion Rings, Mushrooms, Peas

Tomatoes & Salad

£10.00

~~~~~~~~~~~

“Christmas Day Special”

2 Course £15.00

3 Course £20.50 Bottle of Wine per Table

Live Music Saturdays

Free Pool Tuesdays

Design A1rusco

3

Ed Sez It seems the new Gig Guide is well appreciated & there have already

been two satisfied people from the For Sale feature but I still need

more ‘for sale’ items, so tidy out your attics.

I’ve not heard any comments about the Crossword though. I know

the last one wasn’t very professional due to me having difficulty

finding an agreeable format for this publication but I am working on

it.

Although there is no paying-in-meeting in January, there will still be

a Poolscene plus, copies of which will be delivered to your

venues.

Have a good Christmas & prosperous New Year.

THE SHIP INN Frome Rd, Trowbridge (01225) 777340

e-mail: ship99@supanet.com

www.theshiptrowbridge.co.uk

Entertainment Fri/Sat

Bar Food – “Probably the best burgers in town”

Free Pool Sunday & Tuesday

24

Gig Guide

Sat 21st

Andy’s Disco Malt House, Trow

Jane Kelly Wesley Rd Club, Trow

2 Much Labour Club, Trow

Smokin’ Dursley Arms, Trow

Jacqueline Wesley Rd Club, Trow

Shades Lovemead Cons Club, Trow

Sun 22nd

RJ Hall Melks Labour Club (1.30pm)

Mark Stone Grapes, Melks (6pm)

Clive John Bear, Melks (4pm-7)

Tue 24th – Xmas Eve Russ Matthews Wesley Rd Club, Trow

Just Vince Trow Labour Club

Thur 26th

Live Music Ludlow Arms, Westbury

Fri 27th

Live Music Greyhound, Trow

Manic Ship, Trow

Russ Matthews Dursley Arms, Trow

Sat 28th

Andy’s Disco Malt House, Trow

Memo Labour Club, Trow

RJ Hall Melksham House

Mutley Dursley Arms, Trow

Sun 29th

RJ Hall Grapes, Melks (6pm)

Timeless Bear, Melks (4pm-7)

Tue 31st - New Year’s Eve

BJ & the Kipper Trow Labour Club

Dave Rose Lovemead Cons Club, Trow

(Sold Out)

Stranger Melksham Labour Club

Sat 4th Jan

John Morrisey Wesley Rd Club, Trow

Russ Matthews John Bull, Trow

Morning Glory Lovemead Cons Club,

Trow

Regular

Wednesdays

Mellow Live Music Castle, B-o-A

Thursdays

Live Music Grapes, Melks

Info must be received by 25th of the month

for inclusion the following month. Please

check with venues before traveling to avoid

disappointment.

December

Wed 4th

Faye as Kylie Chicago Rock, Trow

RJ Hall West End Inn, Melks

Fri 6th

Daz Black Horse, Trow

Shaine Ship, Trow

Sarah Lace Greyhound, Trow

Sat 7th

Russ Matthews Lovemead Cons Club, Trow

Carey-Ann Wesley Rd Club, Trow

2 Much (Duo) 12 Bells, Trow

The Girls Black Swan, Trow

Charmaine Labour Club, Trow

Skeeters Dursley Arms, Trow

Andy’s Disco Malt House, Trow

Sun 8th

Jacqueline Bear, Melks (4pm-7)

Roger Lendon Grapes (6pm)

Junior Melks Labour Club (1.30pm)

Wed 11th UB40 Tribute Chicago Rock, Trow

Fri 13th

Manic Greyhound, Trow

Russ Mattews Ship, Trow

Hot Dog Jackson 12 Bells, Trow

Sat 14th

Russ Matthews Malt House, Trow

De Moff’s Dursley Arms, Trow

Nikki Dee Trow Labour Club

Matt Black John Bull, Trow

Dave Rose Lovemead Cons Club, Trow

Sun 15th

Manik Bear, Melks (4pm-7)

Jane Kennaway Grapes, Melks (6pm)

Wed 18th

A Touch of Sinatra Chicago Rock, Trow

Fri 20th

Jane Kelly Wesley Rd Club, Trow

Coaster Greyhound, Trow

Live Music Ship, Trow

Design A1rusco

23

THE MALT HOUSE Roundstone St, Trowbridge

A wide selection of premium beers & lagers

♫ Live Entertainment

Every Saturday Night ♫

☺ Pool ☺ Darts ☺ Skittles ☺ Crib Competition Sunday lunchtimes

from 2pm with cash prizes

Late License on Fridays and Saturdays

B & B - Call Jenny on (01225) 353736

Catapult Ears On 29

th October 1999, Monte Pierce (USA) shot an American

10 cent coin a distance of 3.306m (10ft 10.5 in) using his ear as

a catapult. This is the furthest a coin has been propelled with an

ear lobe. Monte began pulling at his ears as a child to relieve

earache, and now, aged 20, can pull them up over his eyes, pull

them down to met under his chin, or roll them up like earplugs.

His left ear stretches to a length of 12–12.7 cm (4.75-5 in), and

his right ear to a length of 11.4 cm (4.5 in). He has perfect

hearing, and doctors assure him that he isn’t damaging his ears

in any way by performing these feats.

Courtesy of the Guinness World Records.

4

Secretary’s Comments.

Could all teams please include their surnames on scorecards as well as their first names or initial. This will mean the League averages can be kept up together correctly. Cartoon of the month.

Design A1rusco

19

Missing Pet Sighted

Further to an article in last month’s Poolscene plus, the

mystery surrounding the disappearance of a pet hamster

deepens. An anonymous photograph was sent to the grieving family showing

the rodent being held aloft outside a bar in the sunny holiday resort of

Tenerife. It was impossible to see from the photograph, which was

quite dark, whether the poor animal was being held against its will,

although it seemed to be sporting a slight tan.

Renowned rodent expert, Dr Herbert Plant, was very concerned about

the pet and offered this advice, “It’s a well known fact that hamsters,

especially domesticated ones, have extremely delicate complexions,

and, as they habitually sleep in the day, when the sun is at its hottest,

they are prone to sunburn or even worse, sunstroke”. He added, “It is

extremely irresponsible of the perpetrators if they do not heed this

warning”, going on to say, “If the animal was left to its own devices, it

would attempt to bring the temperature of its skin down by licking or

urinating (not necessarily in that order) on its paws and rubbing them

onto the burnt areas, but the unfortunate thing was, with only having

short legs, it would not be able to reach its back”. His advice was,

“Someone should rub some ‘Factor 20’ in with the tip of a little finger.

The stricken animal should also be provided with regular drinks to

replenish fluid loss, but alcohol is obviously to be avoided as this

could cause severe dehydration, or at best a bad head”.

President of the Animal Humanities Society (AHS), Mr Ralph

Harris, taking time out from spilling a load of emulsion on a park wall

and speaking from his home in Australia, is quoted as saying, “…it’s a

sad fact of life, blue, but unfortunately, especially as the pet is thought

to be in foreign climes, it’ll probably end up in a kebab, or even worse,

in a pie, and then it’ll be a case of – can ye guess what it is yet?”

Detectives investigating the case are baffled and the only lead they can

glean from the snap is that the male person holding the pet aloft has a

long arm and a silly haircut. He is probably also right handed. The

search continues and police are urging the public to come forward with

any leads.

Poolscene plus

8

K.O.’s The draw for the A-1

Entertainments League

Singles K.O. will appear in the

January issue of Poolscene

plus.

Come and see the new look

TWELVE BELLS

Seymour Rd, Trowbridge – 777260

“The Traditional Boozer” LIVE ENTERTAINMENT

EVERY FRIDAY

Juke Box (50’s, 60’s, 70’s, Irish music)

Pool, Crib, Darts Thursday ‘Jam’ Sessions – Check with Pub for Details

Missing K.O.Forms Crown A, Labour B, Labour A,

Castle, John Bull C Stars, Rising

Sun, Ship A, Black Swan A,

Riverside, Canal Tavern B,

Southwick B, Carpenters B,

Trowbridge R.F.C, Junction A, Black

Horse, Crown B, Shipwrecks, Black

Swan B. This means you’re not in

the singles draw!

Outstanding Debts Here are the teams with debts:-

Dursley B £18, Crown A £41,

Rising Sun £18, Anchor £22,

Black Swan A £27, Junction A

£22, Trow R.F.C. £16,

Riverside £27, Black Horse

£41, Carp B £18, Black Swan

B £24, Malthouse £22. Debts

below £10 are not shown.

Design A1rusco

5

League Team K.O. Draw

(Sponsored by Mark Mumford Electrical Contractors) Round 2 (Played Mon 2

nd Dec)

Match # 1 Malt House v Canal Tavern B

2 Wesley Rd Club B v Junction A

3 Canal Tavern A v Ship A

4 Anchor & Hope v Dursley Arms A

5 Greyhound Growlers v Riverside

6 Southwick Social A v Greyhound Pups

7 Dursley Arms B v Labour Club B

8 Carpenters A v Junction B

Quarter-Finals Draw (To be played 28th

April 2003)

Winner # Winner #

4 v 5

8 v 6

2 v 3

1 v 7

On This Day - December 26 Boxing Day (Handsel Day in Scotland). Feast day of St Stephen.

Events

1620: The Pilgrim Fathers landed at New Plymouth, Massachusetts, to found Plymouth

Colony, with John Carver as Governor.

1898: Marie and Pierre Curie discovered radium.

1908: Texan boxer 'Galveston Jack' Johnson knocked out Tommy Burns in Sydney,

Australia, to become the first black boxer to win the world heavyweight title.

1943: The German battlecruiser Scharnhorst was sunk in the North Sea, during the Battle

of North Cape.

1959: The first charity walk took place, along Icknield Way, in aid of the World Refugee

Fund.

1991: The Soviet Union's parliament formally voted the country out of existence.

Births

1716: Thomas Gray, English poet

1792: Charles Babbage, English mathematician

1891: Henry Miller, US novelist

1914: Richard Widmark, US film actor

Deaths

1797: John Wilkes, British politician and journalist

1972: Harry S Truman, 33rd US president

1974: Jack Benny, US comedian

1999: Curtis Mayfield, US soul singer, composer, and producer

© Copyright Helicon Publishing Ltd 2000. All rights reserved.

Poolscene plus

22

Don’t Quote Me Lennon, John (1940–1980)

Will people in the cheaper seats clap your hands? All the rest of you just

rattle your jewellery.

[At Royal Variety Performance, 15 Nov. 1963]

We're more popular than Jesus Christ now. I don't know which will go

first. Rock and roll or Christianity.

[The Beatles' Illustrated Lyrics]

8-Ballers

Player Team No.

Rich Eddy Pups 3

S.Moon Southwick A 2

Wes Gilchrist Pups 1

Flash Pups 1

Mike Eddy Pups 1

Jeremy Byford-Rew Rising Sun 1

M.Jones J.B.Allstars 1

C.Tucker Southwick A 1

C.Gittins Southwick A 1

D.Beardsley Crown A 1

C.Sherlock Dursley B 1

D.Cavill Rising Sun 1

T.Wheeler Shipwrecks 1

D.Stockley Carpenters A 1

Design A1rusco

7

Division 1 Team Details

Captain Venue No.

Greyhound Pups Flash 752271

Labour Club A Dave Burt 753761

Dursley Arms B Tim Hobbs 752089

John Bull C Stars Buff 775612

Carpenters Arms A Mark Mumford 751010

Castle (B-o-A) Mathew Kick 867280

Crown A Steve James 774245

Dursley Arms A Russ Matthews 752089

Junction B Rob Croker 755947

12 Bells A Dave Power 752905

Labour Club B Barry Moss 753761

Div 1 League Table – up to & including match # 9

Team Played Won Points deducted Points

Greyhound Pups 8 8 2 59

Dursley Arms A 8 7 0 54

Carpenters Arms A 7 7 0 48

Crown A 7 5 2 36

Dursley Arms B 8 4 2 36

Labour Club B 8 3 0 31

12 Bells A 8 2 0 27

Labour Club A 9 2 2 23

Castle (B.O.A) 8 2 2 22

John Bull C Stars 7 2 0 21

Junction B 8 1 0 19

Poolscene plus

20

A Word from the Chairman

Unfortunately we have lost Kings Arms (Hilp) from the

League, but we couldn’t allow the disruption they were

causing by not turning up to League matches, to

continue. Second Division captains please note this has

obviously created a bye for you and as the halfway

point of the season has not been reached, all previous

matches concerning them are scratched.

Paul Doolan is busy sifting through your entry forms at

the moment & the draw for the A1 Entertainments

League Singles K.O. will appear in the January issue.

I received a very nice letter on behalf of the little girl

Charlotte, for whom we made a charity donation. She is

doing okay at the moment, so I’m told, let’s hope this

continues. I’ll post a copy of the letter on the notice

board in the Dursley for all to see.

Have a good Christmas, all of you.

Russ

Design A1rusco

21

Free Pool

Dursley Arms – Wed eve;

Labour Club – Tue & Wed

eve;

Greyhound – Wed eve & all

day Sunday;

Ship – All day Sun & Tue

John Bull – Tue eve.

Anchor & Hope – Tue &

Wed.

CROSSWORD SOLUTION

What a Load of Bull When my Grandad died everyone said his little dog Patch, a

faithful companion for 14 years, would die of a broken

heart. Well that’s a load of b*ll*cks cos we had him put

down the day after the funeral.

Outstanding Matches

/Missing Results

Week 4 Pups v Carpenters Arms A

Week 5 Black Swan A v Renegades

Shipwrecks v Carpenters Arms B

Week 6 Black Swan B v Shipwrecks

Week 7 Black Swan A v Ship A

John Bull Allstars v Stallards

Shipwrecks v Crown B

Week 8 Black Swan B v Carpenters B

Week 9 Crown A v John Bull C Stars

Black Horse v Southwick B

Riverside v Trowbridge R.F.C.

Fines

Late Scorecards / Missed Meetings

Week 4 Pups-Late cancellation

Labour A-Late cancellation

Week 5 Castle-Late scorecard

Shipwrecks-Late scorecard

Black Swan A-Late scorecard

Week 6 Black Swan B-Late scorecard

Week 7 Black Swan A-Late Scorecard

John Bull Allstars-Late Scorecard

Shipwrecks-Late Scorecard

Week 8 Black Swan B –Late Scorecard

Week 9 Crown A-Late Scorecard

Black Horse-Late Scorecard

Missed Meeting-November

Black Swan A, Junction A, Black Horse,

Black Swan B, Malt House, Dursley B.

Poolscene plus

6

Always back the Winner

The Greyhound

Mortimer St, Trowbridge

(01225) 752271

New layout with brand new

bar

Look out for the re-launch party in December

Massive state-of-the-art 5ft cinema projection screen with surround-

sound showing most major sporting events including Football & Rugby

~~~ Wide selection of drinks available at competitive

prices

~~~ Excellent facilities for Pool, Skittles,

Darts, Crib etc ~~~ Live Entertainment Every Friday

~~~ The only thing that’s missing is You!

Design A1rusco

17

For Sale

Sierra 2.0L LX Estate, H Reg, Good Cond, 12 months MOT,

£550 ono – 769605.

Epson Stylus colour 640 printer with software & manual, ink

cartridges are re-fillable, £10 – 769605.

Canon BJ10ex printer (mono) with manual, ink cartridge is

refillable, £5 – 769605.

Audioline digital answering machine, with manual, £5 –

769605.

Six Font T-Bar Dispensers (Two), accept £100 – 777260

Flymo mower £30, Flymo Strimmer £20 – 752794

Matching corner T.V & Entertainment Units (cherry oak) £80 –

752794

Exercise Machine £30 - 752794

“ Jesters” NNNooo... 111 for Discos, Karaoke,

Race Nights, Children’s Parties.

Available for bookings at Clubs, Pubs and for

Private & Corporate functions through

A-1 Entertainments (01225) 769605

(07831) 830038

Poolscene plus

10

Small WORLD! 01225 763535

Castle Place Indoor Market

Trowbridge

“Best Deals In Town…”

BUY / SELL / SWAP Home Entertainment Products

Including books, videos, CD’s,

PC games & much, much more.

How’s the saying go? Further to an article in last

month’s Poolscene it is worth

noting that the Greyhound

Growlers have apparently been

more than happy with the state of

their table. This is in stark contrast to the

comments made by the Pups. So

how then can this be? Do they use

different tables? Is the table made

extra flat for the Growlers and put

out-of-flat for the Pups? Don’t the

Growlers care because maybe the

level of expectancy is lower in

Divisions 2 & 3? There are many

teams I’m sure would beg to differ.

Oh, and the saying goes…

“What’s good for the goose is good

enough for the gander.”

Reminder Division 1, Bye 1 is

actually Labour Club

A. This was printed in a

previous issue, but it seems

some of you have either

forgotten or didn’t read it.

Clash of the Month

16th

Dec – Match #11

Div 3

Wesley Road B

v

Riverside (B-o-A)

My prediction : Home win

Down Memory Lane Div 1 winners in the Winter

season of 1994/95 were the

Navy Tavern C

Design A1rusco

9

Division 2 Team Details

Captain Venue No.

Wesley Renegades Steve Butler 754289

Rising Sun A Stuart Rowe 752453

Ship A Steve Moseley 777340

Anchor & Hope Gary Billington 752794

Black Swan A James Brown 755847

Greyhound Growlers Tony Radwell 752271

Canal Tavern A (B-o-A) Simon Taylor 867426

John Bull Allstars Mike Jones 775612

Stallards Dave Brittan 769838

Southwick Social A Colin Gittens 753667

Div 2 League Table – up to & including match # 9

Team Played Won Points deducted Points

Southwick Social A 7 7 0 49

Canal Tavern A 8 6 0 47

Greyhound Growlers 8 5 0 43

Rising Sun 8 4 0 37

Anchor & Hope 7 4 0 27

John Bull Allstars 6 3 2 27

Ship A 7 2 0 25

Stallards 6 2 0 22

Wesley Renegades 6 0 0 13

Black Swan A 5 1 6 8

Poolscene plus

18

CORSHAM H. & D. Ltd

Light Haulage

(01225) 776278

COLBORNE

TROPHIES

(01225) 764101

Lawrence Fairfield

Electrical Ltd

Electrical Contractors

& Engineers

(01373) 464577

Emergency Lighting Fire Detection Specialists

(0117) 916 1000

D & F Roofing 10 & 15 Years Guarantees

Free Estimates

(01225) 768617

A-1 Entertainments Artistes for all Occasions

(01225) 769605

R. P. B Executive Travel Private Hire Taxi Service

(01225) 712233

(07971) 875535

Mark Mumford Electrical Contractors

(01225) 783073

(07702) 105407

To Advertise Here

Call Russ on (01225) 769605

¼ page - £5 per issue

½ page - £10 per issue

Full page - £15 per issue

Special rates available for 6 months

Most artwork & design is free

POOLSCENE is produced monthly

Trowbridge

Windows Trowbridge’s Longest

Established Installer of

PVCu Windows

(01225) 767536

Design A1rusco

13

Referee Hi All This month details on a couple of points that have caused some lively debate and have caused questions to be asked of yours truly. 1. The correct order in a doubles match. 2. A good point about foul snookers. THE CORRECT ORDER IN A DOUBLES MATCH The rules state that during a doubles match the order must be kept throughout. This is understandable as you may have one player who is stronger than the other which could be utilised unfairly. The question was asked what happens between the games. Should a player who pots the black on the first game be the player to break in the second, if it is that pair's turn to break? The main problem with this whole order thing is that it was designed for matches that take place over a lot more than three frames. So the order is easy to initiate, you simply break in order and then follow the same order of play. As we only play best of three frames it makes it a lot more difficult. Therefore I have been forced to make a decision on this myself. What will happen is the following. It will be decided in the first frame who breaks from the toss of a coin. There is no rule as to which of the first pair breaks on that first frame. So why should there be on the second? That could make an unfair advantage to the winners of the first frame. (I.E. the weaker player in the second pair could be forced to break in the second frame when they are already a frame down) The pair that breaks in the second frame therefore has the choice of who does so. BUT the order of play must stay the same through out.

In the third frame, which is once again decided on the toss of a coin, it will be different. Whichever pair wins the toss, the person who breaks, MUST be someone who has not broken beforehand. This will be my decision if I am asked to make a ruling.

Poolscene plus

14

A GOOD POINT ABOUT FOUL SNOOKERS As you all know if you can't hit both sides of one of your object balls after your opponent has played a foul shot, you are in a foul snooker. Resulting in the referee deciding that you have a free ball. Check the rules for the full details of that, I will not be going into the free ball situation here. However, you must remember that you cannot be snookered by one of your own balls. Have a look at the below diagrams. In both cases "red" has just fouled and yellow is the oncoming player with two visits. Diagram A is a certain free ball situation. Diagram B is not. Diagram A

Diagram B

X

This is not a foul snooker because the lower yellow is taken out of the situation; you cannot be snookered by one of your own colour.

Design A1rusco

15

Averages – up to & including match # 9

Division 1 Name Team Wins / Points

1 Malc Brewer Dursley A 8/22 2 Steve Borlase Pups 7/20 3 Mike Eddy Pups 7/19 4 Russ Matthews Dursley A 7/16

5= John Byrne Carpenters A 6/18 5= Rich Eddy Pups 6/18 7= Andi Mitchell Pups 6/17 7= Wes Gilchrist Pups 6/17

9 Greg Suggitt Dursley A 6/15 10 Tim Hobbs Dursley B 6/15

Division 2

1 Simon Taylor Canal Tavern A 9/23 2 Tony Radwell Growlers 7/21 3 S.Moon Southwick A 7/18 4 K.Taylor Growlers 6/20 5 L.Taylor Canal Tavern A 6/18

6= Jeremy B-Rew Rising Sun 6/16 6= A.Nunn Southwick A 6/16 8= S.Moseley Ship A 5/16 8= R.Mortimer Canal Tavern A 5/16 10 Jason Baraud Growlers 5/15

Division 3

1 P.Griffin Wesley Road B 9/25 2 B.Jones Trow R.F.C. 8/22 3 S.Eade Wesley Road B 7/18 4 S.Evans Junction A 6/20

5= K.Chapman Riverside 6/15 5= J.Davies Canal Tavern B 6/15

7 S.O’Brian Black Horse 6/14 8 L.Sloane Junction A 5/15

9= P.Hall Malthouse 5/14 9= S.Lawson Riverside 5/14

Poolscene plus

12

JUST A THOUGHT . . . (From: ‘smallWORLD’)

Jo-Jo (curves, tiger cub tattoos, curves) baked us a cake last week! This week she lit our cigarette with cupped hands (then we lit hers).

Does this mean our luck’s in? Or not? (Comments invited from single curvy females with tattoos who bake cake and smoke . . .)

Ball Throwing

The furthest distance a standard

155g (51/4 oz) cricket ball was

thrown by a woman was 2.28m

(7ft 6in), slightly greater than the

length of a standard house door,

by Tricia Oldman (SA). The

throw was made whilst playing

for the South African National

Ladies’ Cricket Team against

New Zealand in June 1988, and

was rewarded with a standing

ovation from the crowd.

Courtesy of The sexist Book of

Records.

Time Called Kings Arms (Hilperton)

has been expelled from the

League following yet

another no-show. League Secretary Paul Doolan

received a call on Monday night

from Southwick Social Club

informing him of the non-event. The

landlord of the King’s Arms has

been informed in writing of the

decision and consequently all his

players are suspended for the

remainder of the season and barred

ad infinitum until their debts are

cleared. Second Division Captains

are urged to note that “K” on their

fixture list now becomes a bye.

Short, Sharp and Effective He’s a little man, that’s his trouble. Never trust a man with short

legs – brains too near their bottoms. Noel Coward

Design A1rusco

11

Division 3 Team Details

Captain Venue No.

Crown B Fungus 774245

Southwick Social B Paul Rowland 753667

Canal Tavern B (B-o-A) J.Shields 867426

Junction A Dudley Stobart 755947

Trowbridge R.F.C. Matthew Dowling 761389

Riverside (B-o-A) Kieren Chapman 863526

Wesley Rd Club B Paul Griffin 754289

Ship Wrecks Tanya Silk 777340

Black Horse Sean O’Brien 752632

Carpenters Arms B Simon Mumford 751010

Black Swan B Alan Toomey 755847

Malt House Peter Hall 755514

Div 3 League Table – up to & including match # 9

Team Played Won Points deducted Points

Wesley Road Club B 9 8 0 59

Canal Tavern B 9 7 0 48

Riverside (B.O.A) 8 6 0 47

Carpenters Arms B 8 5 0 42

Junction A 9 4 2 39

Trowbridge R.F.C. 8 4 0 38

Southwick Social B 8 4 0 34

Black Horse 8 4 4 29

Crown B 8 1 0 24

Malthouse 9 1 2 24

Ship Wrecks 7 3 4 24

Black Swan B 7 2 6 15

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Poolscene plus

Answers on page 21

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