slb-055 03/24/07 thinking and communicating understanding effective communication “speaking the...

SLB-05503/24/07

Thinking and Communicating

Understanding Effective Communication

“Speaking the Truth in Love, we will in all things grow up into Him who is the Head,

that is, Christ.” Ephesians 4:15

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Dialoguedi·a·logue or di·a·log nA formal discussion or negotiation, especially between

opposing sides in a political or international contextTalk of any kind between two or more people (formal)vito take part in a conversation, discussion, or negotiationEncarta® World English Dictionary © 1999 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.

Developed for Microsoft by Bloomsbury Publishing Plc.

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Think• 1 Cor 14:20 (2) Brothers, do not be

children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature.

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Think

• Definition | Concise Oxford English Dictionary

• think• v. (past and past part. thought) • 1 have a particular opinion,

belief, or idea about someone or something.

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Think• Definition | Concise Oxford English

Dictionary• think• 2 use one’s mind actively to form

connected ideas about someone or something.

• † have a particular mental attitude.

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Think• Definition | Concise Oxford English

Dictionary• think• † (think of/about) take into account or

consideration.• † (think of/about) consider the possibility

or advantages of.• † (think of) call to mind. • 3 (think of) have a specified opinion of.

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Think• Rom 12:3 For by the grace given to

me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.

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Think• Phil 3:15 Let those of us who are

mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you.

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Know

• 2 Pet 3:17 You therefore, beloved, knowing this beforehand, take care that you are not carried away with the error of lawless people and lose your own stability.

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Core Thinking Skills

• Thinking - thinking refers to the process of creating a structured series of connective transactions between items of perceived information.

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Thinking skills are relatively specific cognitive operations that can be considered the "building blocks" of thinking.

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Evaluating Skills

Information Gathering Skills

Focusing Skills

Generating Skills

Integrating Skills

EvaluatingSkills

Remembering Skills

Analyzing Skills

Organizing Skills

Event

Perception

Appraisal

Representation

VI

Metacognition

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Core Thinking Skills• Metacognition:

• KNOWING HOW TO THINK, and knowing which strategies work best, are valuable skills that differentiate expert thinkers from novice thinkers.

• Metacognition, or awareness of the process of thinking, is a critical ingredient to successful communication.

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• Metacognition - a dimension of thinking that involves knowledge and control of self and knowledge and control of the thinking process.

• Metacognition refers to awareness and control of one's thinking, including:– commitment, – attitudes and – attention.

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• Metacognition:• Commitment: an aspect of knowledge and

control of self that involves a decision to employ personal energy and resources to control a situation.

• Attention: conscious control of mental focus on particular information.

• Attitudes: personally held principles or beliefs that govern much of one's behavior.

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• Metacognition:

• Executive control: evaluating, planning, and regulating the declarative, procedural, and conditional information involved in a task.

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• Metacognition: Executive Control:• Declarative information: factual information.

• Conditional information: information about the appropriate use of an action or process important to a task.

• Procedural information: information about the various actions or processes important to a task.

• Regulating: checking one's progress toward a goal.

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• METACOGNITION consists of three basic elements:

• Developing a plan of action in advance

• Maintaining/monitoring the plan in progress

• Evaluating the plan at conclusion

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• Before - When you are developing the plan of action, ask yourself:

• What in my doctrinal database will help me with this particular task?

• What do I want to happen?

• What do I NOT want to happen?

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Core Thinking Skills• Metacognition:• During - When you are maintaining/monitoring

the plan of action, ask yourself:

• How am I doing?

• Am I on the right track?

• How should I proceed?

• Am I feeling emotions that could derail my plan?

• Is the other person displaying emotion-led behavior?

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Core Thinking Skills• Metacognition:• During:

• Is the conversation heading off track to side issues?

• Am I moving towards what I want, or what I do not want?

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Core Thinking Skills• Metacognition:• After - When you are evaluating the plan of action

ask yourself: • How well did I do? • Did my particular course of thinking produce more

or less than I had expected? • What could I have done differently?• How might I better plan to reopen this

conversation?

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Core Thinking Skills• Metacognition:• Metacognition is an important concept in

cognitive theory. • It consists of two basic processes occurring

simultaneously: monitoring your progress as you learn, and making changes and adapting your strategies if you perceive you are not doing so well. (Winn, W. & Snyder, D., 1998)

http://www.gse.buffalo.edu/fas/shuell/cep564/Metacog.htm

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• Metacognitive Spiritual Communication skills include taking conscious control of planning and selecting goals and strategies for the conversation, monitoring the progress during the conversation, correcting errors, analyzing the adherence to Doctrinal and Spiritual Orientation, and applying Reckoning and Resisting when necessary.

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• Metacognition refers to higher order thinking that involves active control over the thinking processes.

• Activities such as planning how to approach a given task, monitoring, and evaluating progress toward the completion of a task are metacognitive in nature.

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• Most definitions of metacognition include both knowledge and strategy components.

• Knowledge is considered to be metacognitive if it is actively used in a strategic manner to ensure that a goal is met.

• Metacognition is often referred to as "thinking about thinking" and can be used to help students “learn how to learn.”

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Core Thinking Skills• Metacognition:• Cognitive strategies are used to help achieve a

particular goal while metacognitive strategies are used to ensure that the goal has been reached.

• Our metacognition strategy is, first, “to love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind.

• And 2nd - And you must love your neighbor as yourself.”" (Luke 10:27, ISV)

• This defines our Spiritual Metacognition.

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Core Thinking Skills• Metacognitive strategies are sequential processes

that one uses to control cognitive activities, and to ensure that a cognitive goal (e.g., “Speaking the Truth in Love”) has been met.

• These processes help to regulate and oversee every thought process, and consist of planning and monitoring cognitive activities, as well as checking the outcomes of those activities.

• Metacognition requires Confidence, Humility and Skills.

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• "For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust. Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness," (2 Peter 1:4-6, NASB95)

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• Psalm 139:4 (NASB95) Even before there is a word on my tongue, Behold, O Lord, You know it all.

• "and we toil, working with our own hands; when we are reviled, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure; when we are slandered, we try to conciliate; we have become as the scum of the world, the dregs of all things, even until now." (1 Corinthians 4:12-13, NASB95)

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• "If any one think himself to be religious, not bridling his tongue, but deceiving his heart, this man’s religion is vain." (James 1:26, DARBY)

• "He who guards his mouth and his tongue, Guards his soul from troubles." (Proverbs 21:23, NASB95)

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• "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart Be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my rock and my Redeemer." (Psalm 19:14, NASB95)

• "So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another." (Romans 14:19, NASB95)

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• “We all make mistakes, but those who control their tongue can also control themselves in every other way.” Jas 3:2 (NLT)

• “Be gracious in your speech. The goal is to bring out the best in others in a conversation, not to put them down, not cut them out.” Col. 4:6 (Message)

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• “‘Crucial’ conversations are interpersonal exchanges at work or at home, that we dread having but know we cannot avoid. How do you say what needs to be said while avoiding an argument? Day-to-day conversations and interactions affect your life. Crucial conversations can have a profound impact on your career, your happiness, and your future.”

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• “Underneath these topics run the same main point - think twice before speaking.

• Care and thought are needed to make a crucial conversation work.”

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• “When stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong, you have three choices:

• Avoid a crucial conversation and suffer the consequences;

• handle them poorly and suffer the consequences; or

• handle them well … and discover how to communicate when it matters the most.”

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• “If you normally handle tense situations by running the other way, screaming or slamming the door, this book will help you develop constructive habits that will leave you feeling better about yourself. With the skills, you learn in this book, you'll never have to agonize about the outcome of a crucial conversation again.”

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My Style Under Stress• 1. At times I avoid situations that might bring me

into contact with people I’m having problems with.• 2. I have put off returning phone calls or e-mail

because I simply didn’t want to deal with the person who sent them.

• 3. Sometimes when people bring up a touchy or awkward issue, I try to change the subject.

• 4. When it comes to dealing with awkward or stressful subjects, sometimes I hold back rather than give my full and candid opinion.

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My Style Under Stress

• 5. Rather than tell people exactly what I think, sometimes I rely on jokes, sarcasm, or snide remarks to let them know I’m frustrated.

• 6. When I’ve got something tough to bring up, sometimes I offer weak or insincere compliments to soften the blow.

• 7. In order to get my point across, some times I exaggerate my side of the argument.

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• 8. If I seem to be losing control over conversation, I might cut people off or change the subject in order to bring it back to where I think it should be.

• 9. When others make points that seems to stupid to me, I sometimes let them know what without holding back at all.

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• 10. When I am stunned by a con man, sometimes I say things that others might take less forceful or attacking and – comments such as “give me a break!” Or “that’s ridiculous!”

• 11. Some times when things get heated, I move from arguing against others points to saying things that might hurt them personally

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• 12. If I’d get into a heated discussion, I’ve been known to be tough on the other person. In fact, the person might feel a bit insulted or hurt.

• 13. When I am discussing an important topic with others, sometimes I move from trying to make my point to trying to win the battle.

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My Style Under Stress• 14. In the middle of a tough conversation, I

often get so caught up in arguments that I don’t see how I’m coming across to others.

• 15. When talking gets tough and I do something hurt full, I am quick to apologize for mistakes.

• 16. When I think about a conversation that took a bad turn, I tend to focus first on what I did that was wrong rather than focus on others mistakes.

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