RELATIONSHIPSForming and Transforming

GOT RELATIONSHIPS?

“Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike.”

~ J. K. Rowling

WHY RELATIONSHIPS MATTER

IMPROVED HEALTH INTRINSIC REWARDS

Value Invest

Share Own

DISCOVERING THE VALUE IN OTHERS

WHERE’S THE VALUE?

• In First, Break All The Rules, Marcus Buckingham suggests thinking about everyone in a given role, then listing the strengths they possess that make them exceptional in that role…

• Clifton StrengthsFinder 2.0 or similar assessments identify one’s dominant strengths. Once completed by all, each person can appreciate how they are different from each other. It then becomes obvious how everyone contributes to the whole, on an individual basis.

• If you are struggling with a particular relationship, first determine what you find valuable in the other person.

TAKE A MOMENT…

• I really admire the way you: __________________ ____________________________________________.

• I wish I had more of your: ____________________ ____________________________________________.

• You have an exceptional ability to: ____________ ____________________________________________.

• It seems to come so naturally to you; your ability to: __________________________________________.

• Think about a relationship you are struggling with…

• List everything you find valuable about that person…

MAKING THE INVESTMENT

•Alone we are strong…

•Together we are stronger…

NO INVESTMENT / NO RETURN

• In First, Break All The Rules, Marcus Buckingham talks about motivating people individually. He suggests thinking in terms of Chess (the pieces move differently) rather than Checkers (the pieces move the same). Implicit in that idea is getting to know your people as individuals.

• In Primal Management, Paul Herr suggests that it can take up to four months to build trust between people in the workplace…four months of effort before your people will reward you with their trust. And, employees will not initiate the investment, managers must make the first move.

• If you are struggling with a relationship, determine if you have made an investment in the other person.

• In this case, an investment is: taking an interest in them as people; investing time in getting to know them; making the effort to initiate interaction; learning about what’s important to them.

TAKE A MOMENT…

• Because it is so important to you, I have: _______ ____________________________________________.

• I have dedicated: _______________, to support you in achieving: ________________________________.

• I believe I can contribute to helping you accomplish: _______________________, by doing: ____________________________________________.

• I was really impressed by your desire to: ________________, here’s how I think I can help: ____________________________________________.

• Think about a relationship you are struggling with…

• List the ways that you have invested in that person…

SHARING SUCCESS

TAKE A MOMENT…

• I’d like to recognize your accomplishment in: ____________________________________________.

• Thank you! I really appreciate your achieving: ____________________________________________.

• You’ve become a role-model for the team. Congratulations on reaching: ________________ ____________________________________________.

• You made it look so easy! I admire the way you handled: ___________________________________.

• Think about a relationship you are struggling with…

• List the ways that you have shared success with that person…

TAKING OWNERSHIP OF THE RELATIONSHIP

TAKE A MOMENT…

• I just want you to know, no matter what happens, I will support you in: __________________________.

• Don’t worry about: ________________, I’ll take of: ____________________________________________.

• It doesn’t matter if: __________________, happens, we’ll figure it out together.

• Don’t sweat. I’ve got your back. Let me know how I can better support you by: ______________ ____________________________________________.

• Think about a relationship you are struggling with…

• List the ways that you have demonstrated owning your relationship with that person…

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THE COST OF LEADERSHIP IS ONE’S OWN SELF-INTEREST

~ Simon Sinek

From the author of: Start With Why—

Leaders Eat Last; Why Some Teams Pull Together and Others Don’t