parenting with love 2015

P A R E N T I N G W I T H L O V E 1

Preparing Your Child For Primary School

THE NEW AGE PARENTS & NEW AGE PREGNANCY PRESENTw w w . t h e n e w a g e p a r e n t s . c o m | w w w . n e w a g e p r e g n a n c y . c o m

CLIQUE CONFLICTS: SAYING NO TO PEER PRESSURE

GETTING YOUR KIDS STARTED ON MONEY MANAGEMENT

HOW TO BULLY PROOF YOUR CHILD

EXCELLING IN ENGLISH

FALL IN LOVE WITH MANDARIN

COPING WITH COMPETITION IN SCHOOL

2 P A R E N T I N G W I T H L O V E

TOC

CONTENTSEditor’s Note

NUTRITION What did you eat for recess

today? Ensuring your child eats right

Bento Box Basics

Food For Thought

ACADEMICSExcelling in English

Tips to fall in love with Mandarin

Common Maths Misconceptions

Science Wise - Gearing Up For Primary School Science

Science Skills to Nurture

Primary School Maths Essentials

Academic Success at What Cost

Fostering Good Study Habits

Children’s coverpage model Contest: Parenting with Love

EMOTIONAL Coping with Competition in School

Are You Over Stressing Your Child?

Stress Busters For Kids

SOCIAL Bully Proof Your Child

Difference between Leaders and Bullies

Clique Conflicts: Saying No To Peer Pressure

No One Likes Me: Helping Your Child Make Friends

SCHOOL From Kindergarten to Primary School: My Daughter’s Journey

6 Ways To Organise Your Child’s Progress In School

Happier Homeworking with Your Child

Does This Make Cents? Getting Your Kids Started On Money Management

Teaching Our Children The Value Of…Setting Goals

03

04

08

10

12

16

20

24

28

29

34

38

46

48 52

56

60

63

65

68

70

76

78

82

86


Going to Primary School can mean a myriad of emo-tions to different children.

I remembered my mum accompanying me to my first day of school; guiding me through a sea of wide-eyed 7 year olds as I bought my first bowl of Mee Pok during recess. I also recalled a transfer student in my class who cried and wailed for her mother in class. I felt sorry for her and wondered what she was so afraid of. This went on for a week and thankfully, she adjusted to P1 life very well after that.

Transiting to a new environment alone can be scary. Making new friends can be difficult to some. Cliques may begin to form, and children may find themselves having to succumb to peer pressure. In our Social and Emo-tional section, we address some of these challenges and offer practical suggestions with the help of our experts.

To help you understand the content and syllabus of Primary School, we approached various curriculum ex-perts on how parents can foster and encourage children to learn English, Mandarin, Maths and Science in our Academics section.

From helping your child to do their homework to managing their new schedule, we offer some tips in our School section. Preschool to Primary School - it’s a new milestone for both parent and child. I hope this booklet sheds some light on how you can better equip yourself and your child for Primary School. Not just tackling the new curriculum, but also navigating the social and emo-tional aspects as well.

Wishing you and your children an edu-citing journey ahead!

My best,

Michelle Ang

EDITOR’S NOTE

Adjusting to a new environment alone can

be scary. Making new friends can be difficult

to some. Cliques may begin to form, and

children may find them-selves having to suc-

cumb to peer pressure.

BACK TO (A NEW) SCHOOL


WHAT DID YOU EAT FOR RECESS TODAY? Eating healthy food is important especially for kids at school. Many studies have found links between breakfast consumption and cognitive function and performance in school-going children. In one study (Cooper, 2011), breakfast consumption produced higher self-report energy and fullness, lower self-re-port of tiredness, hunger and higher blood glucose concentrations.

Suzanne Khor, Senior Dietician from Thomson Paediatric Centre (The Child Development Centre) suggests healthier meal choices for children to choose during recess.

Reference: Cooper SB1, Bandelow S, Nevill ME., Breakfast consumption and cognitive function in adolescent schoolchildren. Physiol Behav. 2011 Jul 6;103(5):431-9. doi: 10.1016/j.physbeh.2011.03.018. Epub 2011 Mar 23.

NUTRITION


INSTEAD OF THIS CHOOSE THIS

Nasi lemakRice with meat and

vegetables

Nasi lemak contains coconut milk, which is high in saturated fats. It is usually accompanied by fried items like fried ikan bilis, peanuts and fried chicken. Excessive

intake of fried foods is not encouraged in your child’s diet. Furthermore, nasi lemak does not contain a lot of fibre as

it has very little or no vegetables.


Chrysanthemum tea drink

Milk (plain) / reduced sugar soy

bean drink

Sweetened packet drinks have a high content of sugar. For chrysanthemum tea, it may contain about 4 teaspoons of sugar and no protein. A better option is milk, as it contains protein and is a good source of

calcium. Choose unflavoured milk/plain milk instead of chocolate/ strawberry milk. Reduced sugar soybean drink is also an option If your child cannot tolerate dairy food.


Fries and chicken cutlet

Spaghetti with minced chicken

Fries and chicken cutlet or fish and chips contains a lot of fat, with no fibre at all. It is healthier to opt for spaghetti with minced meat as there is some vegetable items in

spaghetti e.g. tomato and mixed vegetables. Take note that air-fried fries or chicken still contain fat and sodium as frozen items are placed in the air-fryer to make them crisp.


Fried noodlesFishball soup

noodles

Instead of vegetarian fried noodles with fried items on the side (549 kcal), choose fishball soup noodles (320

kcal/serve) / or minced meat noodle soup. If yong tau foo soup is available at the canteen,

you can also suggest for your child to choose that occasionally.



Chicken ricePlain rice with

chicken (without skin)

Chicken rice (607 kcal/ serving) is high in saturated fat and does not contain vegetables as a matter

of course. Choose plain rice or brown rice (if avail-able) and side dishes like vegetables and chicken,

tofu, meat or egg.


Mee siam Meehoon soto

Mee siam contains 24g fat per serving and has 9g of saturated fat per serving. Even taking into account the smaller portions served at school canteen, it is better to choose meehoon soto

instead, which contains 462 kcal and 13 g of fat. Macaroni soup is even lower in fat, with 1 g fat only and 483 kcal.


BurgerWholemeal bread

sandwich

Processed meats used in burgers contain nitrates as a preservative and is high in sodium and fat. Similarly

hotdogs are not encouraged too. Instead, choose a wholemeal tuna or wholemeal chicken or egg

sandwich.


Chicken pieChicken/ vegetable

pau (steamed)

It is healthier to choose a steamed food item com-pared to a baked or fried item as the fat content is

usually lower for steamed items. If wholemeal pau is available at school, this is even better as it will contain some fibre. A chicken pie contains about 362 kcal, and

24g fat vs a chicken pau (215 kcal, 10g fat).

Suzanne Khor has been practicing as a clinical dietician for the past 15 years. She obtained her postgraduate degree (Masters of Health

Science Education) from University of Sydney Australia. Her special interests are nutrition in feeding difficulties, diet therapy for neurological disorders, eat-ing disorders and weight management.

NUTRITION


1. Mix SKIPPY® Natural Creamy Peanut Butter Spread and Japanese mayonnaise.2. Spread mixture evenly on 2 slices of bread.3. Layer with one slice of cheddar cheese and honey chicken ham. 4. Sandwich it and cut into flower shapes with a pastry cutter.5. Secure the bread in place with a bento stick.6. Chill the bread until ready to serve.

Makes 12 flower sandwiches. Makes 12 flower sandwiches.

Cheesy Hamwiches withPeanut Butter

- 180g SKIPPY® Natural Creamy Peanut Butter Spread- 1 tsp of Japanese mayonnaise- 12 white bread slices- 12 cheddar cheese slices- 12 honey chicken ham slices- Pastry cutter (flower-shaped)- Pastry cutter (flower-shaped)- Bento stick

Ingredients:

Great taste comes Naturally!

www.facebook.com/SkippySingapore.sg

www.peanutbutter.com


Will my child be able to order their own food during recess? Will he be able to finish it before the bell rings? These are some ques-tions parents with Primary One children may worry about. A fun way to ensure your child eats their meal is to add a twist to your lunchbox look by arrang-ing the food in interesting

combinations, patterns and shapes.

Commonly referred to as bento (a Japanese term), these mini meals are not just tasty and nutritious, but pretty to look at. Plus, they are not as difficult to assem-ble as one might imagine.

Here’s to beautiful, happy bento meals, homemade and handmade with love!

TIP #1: Stock up on supplies at Daiso

Almost every lunchbox-pre-paring mama has shopped for the basics at Daiso. Besides scoring a cute lunch-box, you’ll get a wide range of bento-making tools to satisfy your imagination.

Food picksThey come in many colours

We recognize that many parents don’t have the time or energy to whip up gourmet meals for their child’s school break. Dorothea Chow shows us five tips for packing a happy and healthy bento or lunchbox in a jiffy!


and themes, and are great for spearing fruit, making little kebabs, or simply dress-ing up an otherwise boring sandwich.

Food cuttersUse cookie cutters to make interesting shapes with your bread, ham, cheese, vegeta-bles and fruit! You can also grab some food punches to make smaller shapes out of seaweed, like eyes, mouths, hearts and musical notes. Or just cut with a food scissors.

Silicone, plastic or foil cupsThese are great for compart-mentalizing your food if you have more than one dish, so that the dry stuff (like veg-etable sticks) and wet stuff (like dip) are separated. Also, they just make the box look pretty!

Fake “grass” dividersYou often see these in Jap-anese restaurants or at the sushi counter in supermar-kets. This is another way of separating the food items in your bento, similar to the foil cups.

Rice moldsIf your child likes rice, he’ll beam for joy to see a homemade riceballs in his bento box! These molds are so quick and easy to use, we recommend to use Japanese rice if you’re planning to

make these. Daiso stocks these in the onigiri size and the typical sushi roll size.

Lunch bags and strapsIf keeping the food warm isn’t much of a concern, you can stow away the box in your child’s backpack with an elastic strap to secure it tightly, or in a little hand-carry lunch tote. If you want to keep the meal warm, investing in a thermos flask is your best bet. Check out the house-hold section in your nearest department store, like Isetan, Robinsons or Metro.

TIP #2: Make a little bit of everything

Remember that the lunch-box is actually pretty small, and recess isn’t meant to be a proper full meal (unless your child skips breakfast or lunch). Small portions of each item work best and look better. Restrain yourself from doing the baby-food thing - cooking in bulk and freezing food portions to be doled out over the week ahead. Bento boxes are all about variety, and freshly prepared food is always best.

TIP #3: Simple is bestSave the beef stews and apple pie for dinner. Bento preparation shouldn’t be robbing you of precious time with your family! Choose

simple and easy cooking recipes, or go the no-cook route some days with sand-wiches and fresh fruit. You can even involve your child in the preparation process if time allows, and it can be a fun parent-child activity to do together.

TIP #4: Go with your child’s interest

Sure, you might like the adorable heart-shaped food picks, but your son likes di-nosaurs and dragons. Create a bento box that appeals to your child’s likes. For exam-ple, you can print out little dinosaurs to tape on your food heart picks. Or find a dinosaur cookie cutter that will transform his sandwich-es into a Tyrannosaurus Rex! The sky’s the limit, really.

TIP #5: Get ideas from other mums

With so many parents posting photos from their children’s lunchboxes, inspiration is just a few clicks away. Adapt interesting ideas to suit your child’s food preferences and try some new combinations once in a while. Sometimes, compar-ing your bento creations with other mum’s lunchbox-es may be rather discourag-ing, but always take heart in remembering that your child notices and values your hard work.


QMy son has been buy-ing food such as fries

and fried chicken during his recess time and he is almost on the overweight

range. What can I do? I have no control of the food he buys at school.It's time to sit down and have a chat to your son

For T hou g h tIs your child eating more but

not putting on weight? Worried aboutyour child’s nutritional in-

take? Vanessa McNamara, lead di-etitian at The Travelling Dietitian

addresses some of these concerns.

about why he is choosing these foods as his snack. Is he hungry? How do these foods make him feel? Try to make him more aware of his food choices, how they make him feel and what they taste like so that his eating becomes more of a mindful experience.

Try not to talk about his weight but more about the benefits of eating healthy food and that our body

NUTRITION

needs nutrients to be able to work properly, for ener-gy, to be able to play sport and to keep our brain working as well as it can.

It is also important to empower your son by dis-cussing the foods available at school and asking him to come up with some healthier alternatives that he would be willing to eat or healthy snacks he could take with him from home. Involve him as much as you can in meal planning and preparation and making decisions about the food he eats so he feels lis-tened.

QMy son has a great ap-petite and eats a lot.

But he does not seem to be putting on any weight at all. In fact, he seems skinnier than before! What should I do?The energy requirements of an active, growing boy can be high and children sometimes find it difficult to meet these require-ments. It is important to look at the quality of his food as opposed to the quantity as if he is eating a lot of food with poor nutritional content, it may be difficult for him to gain weight.Try to make sure he is: Eating regular meals and snacks - 3 meals plus 2

snacks per day Has a source of protein at each meal – E.g. meat, chicken, fish, eggs, nuts, tofu, lentils, dairy Has healthy fats in his diet – E.g. nuts and seeds, oily fish, avocado, olive oil Has a source of carbohy-drates at each meal, pref-erably wholegrain – E.g. brown beehoon, brown or white rice, quinoa, pasta, multigrain bread Not filling up on high fat, high sugar snacks that are filling but offer little in the form of nutrients

Q My daughter is very picky about her food

and dislikes her current school's canteen food. How can I encourage her to be more open to eat from the food stalls? What are some easy and healthy snacks or meals I can make for her?

Try to involve your daughter in planning her meals for the week ahead. Go to the school canteen together one day and ask her to come up with ideas for a well-balanced lunch that she would eat. Ideally the meal will contain veg-etables and/or fruit, some carbohydrate and some protein.If this is not possible at school, ask her to think of some suitable snacks she would enjoy instead. They

could include: Cheese and salad sand-wich Homemade savoury or fruit muffin Popcorn and fresh fruit Homemade soup in a thermos and slice of bread A baked frittata or quiche made with egg and vegetables

Vanessa McNamara is the founder and lead dietitian at The Travelling Dietitian, a nutrition consultancy in Singapore. She has a special interest in helping families to achieve a healthy life-style without sacrific-ing their enjoyment of food. Having her own child has helped her to understand there are many challenges associated with feed-ing children but she believes that teaching them about nutrition from a young age will prepare them for a healthy future.

For T hou g h t


ACADEMICS

EXCELLING IN

ENGLISH


We want our children to ex-cel, not only in school, but also in life. To be able to do whatever they set their heart on, to have the skills and confidence they need to succeed. One of the most important skills you could ever ensure your child has is the ability to use language well. What good is high intelligence and sparkling creativity if you cannot share your thoughts and ideas?

We believe mastering a language is a skill that will

benefit you in every area of your life.

1. LANGUAGE IS CAUGHT, NOT TAUGHTChildren need to have a reason to use language. Ask your child questions and wait for them to answer, this could be to describe how their day went, what they learnt, in school, how they are feeling, what they watched on YouTube and why they enjoyed it.

Ask lots of questions and provide your child with many different experiences. Language is most common-ly used to label experiences; How does that taste? What did you see? The more a person can experience, the wider their vocabulary will be.

Now, we don’t all have the time and money to travel the world experiencing new things but don’t worry, you don’t have to – you can read! Through books and the beautiful, evocative language many of them contain we can be transported to worlds far way.

2. MAKE IT MEANINGFUL AND RELEVANTEnglish is the language most

commonly used in Singapore and therefore the opportuni-ty for exposure is there. Wid-ening your child’s vocabulary or improving their grammar should happen painlessly through exposure to good language models. Giving them opportunities to read, write and speak in a variety of different situations will enable them become more confident with the language, to be humorous, make puns and jokes.

3. POSITIVE REINFORCEMENTJust as when your toddler began speaking, positive re-inforcement and encourage-ment are still needed. Even children as old as teens can still get tenses and plurals wrong on occasion. Repeat back to them correctly or gently remind them but always encourage them to continue speaking or writing.

If your child is keeping a journal or writing poetry, don’t focus on grammar or spelling. Celebrate any efforts they make to express themselves as it is through practice and experience that they will learn how to use the language to their very best advantage.

Once your preschool child has grasped

the skills needed to read and write, how

can you ensure he keeps on learning

and growing in his confidence to most effectively use En-

glish? Fiona Walker, Chief Executive

Officer and Princi-pal of Schools, Julia

Gabriel Education and Lynette Chua,

Head of School Sup-port Services, Julia

Gabriel Centre offer some tips.

“THE LIMITS OF MY LANGUAGE ARE THE LIMITS OF MY WORLD.” -LUDWIG WITTGENSTEIN


4. UNDERSTAND THE REQUIREMENTS OF PRIMARY SCHOOL CUR-RICULUMThe best way to support your child’s academic progress is by fully under-standing what is required of them by the school. These requirements should provide the foundation for your child. These are the skills they need to obtain in order to move forward and how well they do will determine their success in school. Often, parents talk amongst themselves or remember a time before latest MOE curriculum changes and therefore are not clear on what exactly is required. This can lead to unnecessary stress for everyone involved.

5. LANGUAGE MODEL We learn the language we are surrounded by. So the question is: “What language surrounds your child?”

Take a good, hard look at the English language that is used in the home, this is how your child will use language. If your child spends much time with grandparents or a helper, who are using En-glish as a second language then that will affect their use of the language. Do you usually communicate in Singlish at home? Again this is how your child will use

Fiona has worked at Julia Ga-briel Education since 1991 and believes every childhood should be filled with positive experi-ences and wonder. She works with teams in our centres in Sin-gapore and overseas to ensure

our programmes deliver the Julia Gabriel promise.

Lynette was trained and quali-fied through Nanyang Techno-logical University, the London Academy of Music & Dramatic Art and Trinity College London. A mother to three daughters, and a lover of reading, she has

been with Julia Gabriel Centre since 2002. Lynette works closely with MOE schools in Singapore, designing programmes to suit their language and communication skills requirements.

language. There is a place for Singlish, it a culturally relevant form of language in Singapore, however if that is your child’s only exposure to English it is limiting.

Singapore, being a multi-cultural city with many people often mixing

two or more languages into phrases we need to be mindful of the standard of English our children are exposed to. Again, books are the best way to bring rich and vibrant language into the house if you want to expose your child to a level of language they may not have exposure to on a daily basis.

Remove all the limits you can for your child by ensur-ing they can express them-selves clearly, creatively and confidently in English. This is a skill that goes well be-yond the school years and so worthwhile investing in.

ACADEMICS

C

M

Y

CM

MY

CY

CMY

K

JGC A5 Young Parent Seminar.pdf 1 16/3/15 11:36 AM


TIPS FOR FALLING IN LOVE WITH

Having trouble getting your child to love Chinese? Huang Ying, Head of Cheng-zhu Mandarin Centre and Iris Lim, Principal of Chiltern House Preschool show us how you can inspire your child to love Mandarin.

ACADEMICS


MANDARINParents can make a huge

impact in helping their child to learn Chinese. To inculcate the love for learning Chinese, you first have to possess a positive attitude towards helping your child learn. Here’s a secret to help your child fall in love with Chinese: Just remember this very sim-ple acronym LANGUAGES and you will be amazed by what you can accomplish with your child!

L ITERATURE : We believe that a lot of you read stories to your children

before they go to bed. It would be good if you read English and Mandarin stories every other day or one story in each language every day. If you are not a confident reader in Man-darin, sit with your child and listen to Chinese audio books while you follow the story in the book.

A SSOCIATION: One person, one code. What it means is one person

should only speak one consis-


tent language to your child. We have met many parents who tell us that they give up when their child continues to reply in English when they try to speak Mandarin with them. Do try to find ways to help them.

NOTICE: Listen to your child, notice the smallest things and talk

about them. For example, ‘Oh, is this the word you learned to-day? Can you teach me please?’ Let your child know that you noticed how hard he or she is trying and how proud you are.

GAMES AND PLAY: Children love games. When they are enjoy-

ing a game, they chat happily and learn new words and sentences quickly.

U SE IT OR LOSE IT: What can you do to encourage Mandarin

conversation at home? We need to create fun and exciting activities for children to join in and practice Mandarin. For example, children love light-hearted competitions and we can base activities on them.

A PPRECIATE: You have to believe that your child can do it! You can

show your appreciation by en-couraging and praising them. When your child believes they are good at something, they will be proud to show

you what they can do and in turn their self-esteem and confidence will be raised.

GO TO WHERE THE LANGUAGE IS SPOKEN: One of the

best ways to boost language learning is to visit the country where it is spoken. Just two or three weeks of total immer-sion within a rich language environment has an amazing effect on language develop-ment!

E NGAGE: What interests your child? What are they enthusiastic about?

Whether it's a love of animals, dance or sport, make an effort to support and encourage these passions using Mandarin. The language is part of our life and not just an assessed sub-ject along with Mathematics or English.

S INGING: Singing is a great and fun way to engage in language

learning. We believe that it is a natural way to learn lan-guage and just as importantly children love them too! You do not have to learn many songs, you can learn a few tunes and change the words to ones that the children are learning.

So have fun trying the above strategies with your child and most importantly enjoy the process with them!

Huang Ying was trained and quali-fied through Beijing Language & Culture University, Beijing Pre-school Teacher Train-ing Academy and the Julia Gabriel School of Education. She speaks regularly on how par-ents can support their children’s learning of mandarin.

Iris Lim has a Master of Arts degree in Early Childhood Studies from Roehampton University. She first joined Chiltern House as a Kindergarten teacher. As Principal of Chiltern House, she oversees the running of all Chiltern House centres in Singapore.

ACADEMICS

Chengzhu Mandarin Centre35 Rochester Drive, #03-01 Rochester Mall, Singapore 138639 T +65 6737 5348 E [email protected]

• Creative writing 创意写作

• Expressive vocabulary 词语运用与表达

• Interactive curriculum 互动式教学

• Language development 语言发展

• Cultural arts 文化艺术

• Literacy activities 文学欣赏

At Chengzhu Mandarin Centre, innovative programmes and a nurturing environment immerse students fully within the Chinese culture, enabling them to establish a strong foundation in Mandarin, develop the skills required to master the language and excel in school.

Our progressive curriculum ensures success in Mandarin throughout primary school by combining academic studies with interactive projects, role-play and literacy activities for children aged 6 months to 12 years.

Let your child discover and develop a love for Mandarin. Visit Chengzhu Mandarin Centre – the latest addition to the Julia Gabriel Education group.

C

M

Y

CM

MY

CY

CMY

K

Chengzhu A5 Young Parent Seminar.pdf 1 16/3/15 11:54 AM


Misconceptions

CommonMaths

ACADEMICS


Is drilling and practice all your child needs to excel

in Maths? Michelle Ang clarifies some of the com-

mon misconceptions about learning maths with

Lau Chin Loong, Co-founder of Seriously Addictive Math-

ematics (S.A.M).

MYTH 1My child can’t add, sub-tract, multiply, divide properly. He is going to fail Maths terribly.First of all, it is a myth that a child will fail miserably if they do not understand the basic operatives (as-suming the child is 7 years old or below) early in their lives. Every child learns at a different pace. What is most important is that they are given the oppor-tunity to learn at their own pace, and to learn the core fundamentals, rather than to memorize formulas and recite big numbers through rote learning. If indeed, they have been given the opportunity to discover and learn the core fundamentals effectively, and are still struggling with basic operatives, professional help may be required. But its still not the end of the world. Your guidance and encourage-ment will go a long way to building your child’s confidence in Maths and for them to learn to their best ability.

MYTH 2Left-brained children will excel better in Maths.I will not be too pre-occu-pied with such theories. Knowing whether your


child is more left or right brained is a good tool to decide on which learning method suits your child better, rather than to judge your child on his future Mathematical prow-ess. How your child’s brain is wired, Maths is and will always be an important subject. Having said that, today’s Maths syllabus involves a lot more cre-ativity and imagination as opposed to merely logic and critical thinking.

MYTH 3For my child to do well, all I have to do is to drill him with Math assess-ment books.For your child to do as well, they must most of all, enjoy Maths, and know what they are doing. Often, drill and practice methods become tedious and children tend to func-tion mechanically without thinking; thus losing sight of the reasoning behind their methods. This does not mean that drill and practice is bad. They understand the fundamen-tals, and understand what they are doing, they are practicing the right things. If they just blindly go through the routine, they will get confused when exam questions vary from their practice.

MYTH 4Teaching my child to learn math is difficult.Yes, it can be difficult unless parents put in the effort. Study your child’s maths text and other supplementary books to familiarize yourselves be-fore attempting to teach. When teaching, try to use concrete examples first. Use things that your child can see, touch and feel. Then move on to drawing pictures to illustrate. If they are older, you may use more abstract examples of model drawing to problem solve. Otherwise, you can seek professional assis-tance from established enrichment centers to en-hance your child’s learning experience in Maths.

MYTH 5The earlier I start to teach my child Maths, the better.This is true as long as your child is not ‘forced’ into learning things they don’t quite comprehend yet. Studies have shown that early exposure to Maths in the real world does increase their IQ levels in later years. Children may begin to understand the concept of numbers as early as 3 years of age, even though they may not be able to write or

recite numbers. The gen-eral guideline is to expose children to the world of numbers at around 4 years of age, but in a creative and fun way. Do note that being able to count from 0 to 100 is not actually learning Mathematics. Your child should be working on skills such as the ability to discern, classify and associ-ate quantity with number representations.

ACADEMICS

Co-founder of Seriously Addic-tive Mathematics (S.A.M), Lau Chin Loong is also the lead mathematics curriculum devel-oper for S.A.M and the principal trainer for the franchise. He holds a Bachelor’s degree in psychol-ogy from Dalhousie University (Canada) and has an MBA from Leicester Uni-versity (UK). He also holds a Post-Grad-uate Diploma in Education from NIE (NTU). Before co-founding S.A.M, he was a primary school teacher.


Pandan Valley2 Pandan Valley

#01-202 Acacia CourtSingapore 597626

Tel: 6463 0056 Parkway Centre1 Marine Parade

Central#10-02 Parkway CentreSingapore 449408

Tel: 6348 9048

Toa PayohBlk 83 Lorong 2

Toa Payoh #01-455Singapore 310083

Tel: 6258 2008

Jurong East Central

Blk 134 Jurong Gateway Road

#03-307BSingapore 600134

Tel: 6899 9302

TampinesBlk 477 Tampines Street 43 #01-156

Singapore 520477 Tel: 6260 8687

Thomson224A Upper

Thomson RoadSingapore 574356

Tel: 6456 4898

Bukit Timah1 Jalan Anak Bukit#02-27 Bukit Timah

PlazaSingapore 588996

Tel: 6466 1684

Serangoon237 Serangoon

Avenue 3 #01-110 Singapore 550237

Tel: 6846 9776

Orchard545 Orchard Road

#11-10 Far East Shopping Centre

Singapore 238882Tel: 6520 0338

Yishun

Blk 103 Yishun Ring Road #02-85

Singapore 760103Tel: 6257 1744

“I like the fact that the S.A.M program is catered for the preparation of the Singapore Mathematic Syllabus. Also, as the progression is based on individual ability, it has allowed my 6 year old son to progress to Primary 3 Level Mathematics in a fun and interesting way. He now comprehends the words and phraseology in the word problems easily. The problems are set in a myriad of ways, so he is taught to be flexible in finding solutions.”- Anne Chiang, In-House Counsel, Mother of Aidan, 6 years old

w w w. s e r i o u s l y a d d i c t i v e m a t h s . c o m . s g | e n q u i r y @ s e r i o u s l y a d d i c t i v e m a t h s . c o m . s g

Seriously Addictive Mathematics Works!

S.A.M Centres


ACADEMICS


SCIENCE WISE

Gearing Up For Primary School Science


Q WHAT IS A COMMON MISTAKE MOST P1 CHILDREN MAKE?

P1 syllabus is relatively easy and can be fun. This is the best time for the children to build their basic foundation so that the transition to the higher levels could be a breeze. Take the first year to build up your vocabulary and grammar. That will help your Maths and Science subjects too.

For instance, students who fail to learn how to write independently in P1 will find it harder to catch up with their peers in P2. The syllabus will only get tougher and you will be lagging further behind.

QWHAT'S THE BIGGEST HURDLE DO YOU THINK CHILDREN HAVE DIFFICULTY TO

GRASP WHEN THEY TRANSIT FROM PRE-SCHOOL TO PRIMARY SCHOOL?

For many, it would be their first time experienc-ing a test or exam. They have to get used to the fact that there will be competition, comparison among peers and a fair amount of stress as they grow older. Hopefully, this will also help the P1s mould into a stronger person.

Q+A WITH WALLACE WONG, CO-FOUNDER OF STUDY ROOM

NOT JUST ROTE-LEARNINGIt's no longer about rote-learn-ing. It's a slow process, but the Ministry of Education is moving away from that. 40% of marks are allocated to knowledge and understanding, but 60% of the marks tests application and process skills. This means that memorising facts and reading guide books are no longer going to guarantee a good grade.

BE A *KAYPOHThe key to doing well is really about the process skills such as inquisitiveness, generating possibilities, communication, analysing, evaluating and inferring. With these skills, the factual knowledge and understanding comes easily. To develop these skills, par-ents can:Ask questions instead of

feeding answersFor example, if a child asks why do water droplets appear on the exterior of cold drink cans,

instead of giving the answer straight up, prompt the child with questions to think and guess. Don't dismiss the wrong

What do you need to know

about helping your child learn

Science? TNAP asks Wei Yi

Lim, Founder of Study Room to find out more.

ACADEMICS


Wei was a corre-spondent whose work has been published on the Washington Post, the International Herald Tribune, the Wall Street Journal, Bloomberg News and others. He had worked in Taipei, Hong Kong and China and covered the presidential elections in Taipei and Singapore. Wei wants to help students in Singa-pore achieve bigger things in life with the power of lan-guages.

answer straight away but encourage them to think about the reasons for their answer and whether it is logical. Give credit to any whacky ideas they might have and have fun with them; this encourages them to use their imagination.Encourage independent learningPoint them in the direction of certain activities, for example, trips to the science centre, but then let them take the time to explore and wonder. Involve your child in projectsThese could be fun science projects, or it could be cooking or baking projects. Either way it encourages active learning.

*Kaypoh: A Hokkien term used to describe someone who is nosey or a busybody

MASTER OPEN-ENDED QUESTIONSOpen-ended questions can be frustrating but with a bit of effort, it's possible to ace. There are three main components to

doing well in these. First is the knowledge and understanding of the concepts. Second, the process skills (analyse, interpret etc.,) And answering technique. Answering technique involves understanding what the exam-iner is trying to ask, and what the student needs to demon-strate in his answer. The answer also has to be clear, concise, complete, and accurate.

MASTER ENGLISHEnglish is really important in Science. The student has to read and interpret lengthy questions. Open-ended questions require answers in full, grammatically correct, and concise sentences. Marks are also not given to spelling mistakes.

MEMORY WORK (DURING THE INITIAL STAGE)While many of the concepts learnt are easily applicable to daily experiences, and do not require delving too deep into the topic, some facts that they learn cannot be explained until

much later and thus require memory work.

For example, students learn that evaporation depends on humidity, temperature, wind and exposed surface area. These facts need to be memo-rised now - but later on when they learn about molecules, it's easy to visualise and the factors are easily extrapolated.


1 INVESTIGATIVE SKILLSChildren need to be able to find out things on their own. What happens when water is poured into an odd shaped container? In which condi-tions does water evaporate fastest? What do rabbits eat? How much air can be pumped into a football? These are some questions that children should be able to investigate on their own and it's an important skill to have.

2 PROBLEM SOLVINGProblem solving is another critical skill to cultivate. Your

child should be able to un-derstand the problem, anal-yse and interpret what the underlying issue is and think of possible solutions to the problem. It will involve a bit of calculated guesses and testing which aids in the sci-entific process. For example, if a sticky tape doesn't hold a Christmas decoration up, what can you do? If there's some spilt water in the bathroom floor but there is no mop or a cloth to wipe it up, what can you do?

3 COMMUNICATIONChildren need to be able to communicate their ideas

and their findings. Com-munication is important in Science because it is all about understanding and application of concepts and ideas.

4 INFERENCE Application of concepts and ideas mean children will need to infer and to relate to life experiences. For example, when children learn about gestation pe-riods, generally mammals of the same size will share the same gestation periods. And larger mammals will have a longer gestation period as compared to smaller mammals. can infer that the gestation period of a mouse will be similar to a rat, and a tiger to be similar to a lion. Or when water evaporates it cools the surroundings - so that spraying water in a fine mist will also cool the surroundings because it evaporates quickly.

5 PERSEVERANCEIf your child fails, encour-age them to try and try again. Don’t be afraid of making mistakes. Grit is applicable to everything not just in science. Thomas Edison didn't make 999 failures. He discovered 999 ways not to make a lightbulb.

5 SCIENCE SKILLS TO NURTURE IN EVERY CHILD By Wei Yi Lim,

Founder of Study Room

ACADEMICS


By Lau Chin Loong, Co-founder of Seriously Addic-tive Mathematics

BASIC PRE-NUMERACY SKILLS When a child enters Primary 1, the mathematics syllabus does not assume any formal learn-ing. However, the following are basic pre-numeracy skills that are necessary in providing a good starting point:

Matching The child begins by matching things that have the same characteristics (color, shape and size) using concrete things followed by pictures.

Sorting As they begin to match more than two things, they are sort-

ing. This involves separating things into groups according to similarities. This involves the following steps:

Deciding which characteris-tics to sortPhysically sortDescribing the reason for their choice

ComparingFor example, the child is able to compare quantity (more, less, same) or length (longer, shorter, same) of things.

Basic ShapesThe child is able to rec-

PRIMARY SCHOOL MATHS ESSENTIALS

ognize basic shapes (like squares, rectangles, circles and triangles) around them. For example, a slice of bread may look like a square, a wedge of cheese may look like a triangle and so on.

CountingBasic counting to 10 by sing-ing, using fingers, abacus beads, toys etc.

SOME COMMON ERRORS IN PRIMARY SCHOOL MATHS7 is 2 less than ____.The child would say the an-swer is 5, because they see the word “less” and simply compute 7 – 2 = 5.

3 – 7 = 4The child writes a wrong subtraction statement by using a smaller number to take away a bigger number.

Peter has 3 marbles. He buys 2 more and gives 1 to Jane. How many does he have now?3 + 2 = 5 – 1 = 4

Here the child under-stands how to solve the problem, but does not know what the “=” sign means.

2 x 3 = 6 is the same as 3 x 2 = 6Although the answer is the same, these multiplication statements do not mean the same thing.


GALT SPECIAL

Spur Your Child’s Curiosity with

GALT


WORKING WITH PUZZLESA fantastic way to develop children’s cognitive develop-ment and help them think critically, Working with Puzzles is an educational toy designed to hone children’s problem solving skills, spatial awareness and self-esteem. The colourful puzzle pieces encourage matching and sorting skills while the popu-lar puzzles for school-going children include changing pictures, amazing 3D and magic jigsaws.

WHY WE LOVE IT With Galt’s wide assortment of puzzles, there is always something for every child. Their puzzles cater to toddlers to preschoolers. For the little ones, we recommend the Baby Puzzles and Giant Floor Puzzles.

CREATIVE CRAFT KITSEver thought of introducing your child to a craft hobby such as crocheting, knitting, sewing, braiding, painting, folding and baking? Now you can do so effortlessly with Galt’s wonderful selection of activity packs.

WHY WE LOVE IT It has all that you need neatly packed into one. Getting started on

DIY projects has never been so simple and fuss-free. An ideal kit to keep your little ones occupied when trav-elling, these kits also make creative birthday gifts for young aspiring crafters.

MAGICAL GIRL CLUBGlitter, magic, fairies, princesses and all things sweet. In Galt’s Girl Club set, you will find unique activity packs for girls from pre-schoolers to preteens. These craft kits also make great activities for children’s parties or sleepovers. WHY WE LOVE IT The wide selection of activity packs allows your girls (and boys) to weave,


stick, bake and sew! From origa-mi to painting and card making, there's a craft kit to suit all tastes and age. We recommend the Fairy Sparkle Mosaics and Charm and Jewellery sets.

SCIENCE AND DISCOVERYSatisfy your little explorer’s curiosity and enter the word of wonders through Galt’s Horrible Science experiment

kits. With these kits, children get hands-on experience with weird and wacky experi-ments to learn about their environment, from erupting volcanoes to worm hotels.

WHY WE LOVE IT Ob-serving microscopic mon-sters, mixing up a storm, concocting their very own potions and growing their own crystals - these are not your average school science experiments your child gets to examine every day. We rec-ommend the Slippery Slime and Violent Volcano kit.

HOME LEARNING BOOKSNurture your child’s interest for learning through Galt’s educational home learning books. These books are spe-cially written and designed by experts to support pre-school and further learning. It also aids in developing foundation skills for life-long learning.

WHY WE LOVE IT The colourful and imaginative learning books use bright stickers, friendly characters and activities to pique your children’s interest to learn about words and numbers. The broad collection of books also cover skills from hand-writing, spelling, counting and multiplication. We rec-ommend Times Tables Book (with rewards stickers) and Word Search Writing Pad

CRAFT STATIONERYCreative tools give power to imaginative minds. Galt’s selec-tion of children’s art materials provide endless possibilities for your child to unleash their inner Picasso. You can find a spectrum of art sets, poster paints, felt tip pens and pencils.

WHY WE LOVE IT We say the most popular choice goes to the Squeeze ‘n Brush

GALT SPECIAL


(for the younger kids) and Paintastics range - where the paint is IN the brush! Combine with different brushes, glue and play paper, Galt’s craft stationary has everything your budding artist needs.

Make learning your child’s play. Engage your child with the right choice of toys and products.

With over 175 years’ of experience in toys and education, Galt knows what works best for children. Their different educational toys and products are specially de-signed to encourage children to learn through play and had fun while doing so.

Infantino Enterprise Pte Ltd is the sole distributor of Galt’s products in Singapore. Galt’s quality toys and products are now available at Major Departmental Stores. For more information on Galt’s products, visit www.galttoys.com

Make learning engaging for your child with the right set of toys and products.


ACADEMICS


ARE YOU OVERSCHEDULING YOUR CHILD?Singapore’s students are often seen cramping in any way they can. Some parents overbook their schedules in addition to their existing, piling homework from schools. While some students can flourish in such an environment, there are those who do not. These students could be lacking sleep, and their results could be suffering at the same time. They could be going to tuition classes all week and piling additional assignments as they go along. These days, tuition in Singapore (and in Asia)

SUCCESS AT WHAT ACADEMIC

COST?

Today’s academic landscape has become more

competitive and it is different from the

past. Such change has brought about parents’ involve-

ment on many different levels. In fact, without such

parent participation, some children may find themselves in

disadvantaged situations.

By Caroline Yeung


is so common that no one really questions the need for it anymore.

HIGH EXPECTATIONS AND PRESSURE According to one USA Today article (August 4, 2013), Asian students study with a tremen-dous expectation - they study to be successful in life. From young, children are taught that education is the only avenue to success in life. Parents put their children’s academic lives a top priority, and they are willing to spend as much (including funding for oversea education).

This purposeful pursuit is also forcing families to make choices, sometimes sacrificial, to afford their education. In China, some families go into debts or delay their family plans to chase for the edu-cation dream. According to Samsung Economic Research Institute in Seoul, 70% of the South Korean expenditure goes to private education.

On the other hand, some may argue that a competitive education system may not be all that bad for Singapore students as it can produce top talents for the nation. However, the overall outcome can be affected if the students are put under sufficient stress on a daily basis. Such result-oriented approach leaves little room for students to grow and explore intellectually.

DOES YOUR CHILD REALLY NEED TUITION?Weiyi Lim, Founder of Study Room, believes the key is about getting the right help. “If parents are looking for extra help, they should find one that their child would enjoy, help to ignite the interest in learning and provide a wider scope of education, instead of just rote-learning from the curric-ulum. These classes would be useful for the children, regard-less whether they are weak in their studies.”

“At Study Room, that’s what we gear towards- more than curriculum. We try to use games to get them interested in learning and we expose them to current events and practical uses of Maths and Science so that they can understand the subject matter better and also acknowledge the usefulness of education.” Wei adds.

IMPORTANCE OF SPORTSWhile academics are import-ant, health is also critical for one to be successful in life.

In Nominated Member of Parliament Dr Ben Tan’s parliamentary speech in 2015 where he highlighted ten worrying trends in Singapore Sport’s culture, two trends he noted was the lack of exercise in Singaporean’s lifestyle and how students were struggling

with their fitness levels. Sports interaction helps

to eliminate stress, provides discipline and motivation for children to move on. Many parents do not understand that sports can help to develop physical skills; reduce anxiety and depression; and promote cooperation, interaction, and friendship. In addition, sporting activities enable individuals to adopt ethics and improve self-esteem which are funda-mental in life.

In order to get more young-sters involved in sporting activities, Education Minister Heng Swee Keat announced the new Physical Education syllabus at the second Physical and Sports Education Con-ference on July 31, 2013. To encourage recreational sports, every student has to take part in friendly matches starting from next year.

There are also resources available. For example, ActiveSG has a National Stan-dards for Youth Sports Parents Guide on their website (www.myactivesg.com) sharing how children can learn values through sports and how parents can play with them, support them and watch over them as they participate in sports.

MAKE TIME FOR LEISURE Leisure or unstructured activ-ities are essential to children.

ACADEMICS


Just as adults need a break or vacation every now and then, youngsters also need to take time to explore other interests besides study. A change in landscape or activity can help them to relax, and renew their energy level.

According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, just as unstructured play is important for the child’s development and contributes to their cogni-tive, physical, social and emo-tional well-being; unplanned activities can also help to spur exploration interests, imagina-tion, creativity, and growth in children.

Free time activities, both indoor and outdoor, can include arts and crafts, cooking,

dancing, drawing, trekking, painting, gardening, reading, singing, and any unstructured play. A walk in the park or by the beach can also be a leisure activity.

WHAT IS THE BEST EDUCATION? The best education in life is one that does not limit to academ-ics. Confidence, cooperation, discipline, ethics, interaction, motivation, and self-esteem are life’s fundamental values which may not come from education alone. A child needs certain life skills to navigate through life – their overall development is derived from consistent exposure to differ-

ent activities and processes in life.

Every generation sees a new and better breed. As we become more educated than our parents, and our children become more tech-sav-vy than us, we have the responsibility to safeguard our children’s physical and mental health while they are undertaking life’s pursuits.

Just as the government and organizations are tasked to streamline policies, parents and educators are also ex-pected to be informed about the best options in order to help children, and ensure they do not suffer burnout or fall-out easily.


ACADEMICS


It is first important as parents to recognize what being study smart means to you. To me, it calls for one to be knowledge-able about their strengths and challenges, tap on their strengths and apply various strategies to learning in order to be most effective at per-forming at their best in school. Being able to apply various study strategies successfully is

critical to success in school and useful for lifelong learning.

1 LEARN WHAT WORKS BEST FOR YOUR CHILDStart by helping your child recognize what works best for them during the learning process. Having conversations with your child to identify strengths and challenges may be very helpful.

What does ‘study smart’ mean? Does it simply mean being able to in-vest in the least amount of time and effort for the best academic grades? Michelle Ang speaks to several ex-perts to find out more.

Study (Not Hard)!

FOSTERING GOOD STUDY HABITS


Why? Such conversa-tions help children better recognize themselves as effective learners, and many times, with the facilitation of an adult, provide great opportunities for children to discover specific strategies to abilities or learning styles to better themselves as learners.

How? Model with them how to think about how they learn best and the choice of words used in such conservations are importance. Some examples are: “How do you learn best? What can we do to help you be at your best in school? What can you do to remem-ber what your teacher said in class?”

2 HAVE A GOOD MIX OF PLAY, ACTIVITIES AND RESTDeveloping a schedule with your child is a good exercise parents can participate. This promotes a sense of owner-ship and responsibility among children in time management. A child ready to learn is a child with a healthy mind, body and soul. It is important that they receive enough rest to promote better attention and focus.

3 PRAISE AND MOTIVATECHILDREN NEED TO FEEL EMPOWERED AND CAPABLE. Introducing some motivation-al techniques to your child can be very helpful. Children should be acknowledged for the efforts that they put in and this should start from parents.

At the end of the day, what we want for our children is not one who tops the class in their grades but one who gives their best in all they do and prides themselves for that.

EXPERT: Jaclyn Smith, Curriculum Specialist for Learning Vison

4 KNOW YOUR CHILD’S LEARNING STYLEAs your child grows, observe the way they learn: Are they able to sit and concentrate for a long time before they become bored with an activity? Do they appear to pay more attention to what people say to them or do they appear to thrive more with visual cues? Understand-ing what type of learner your child is (auditory, visual or

ACADEMICS


kinaesthetic, or a combination), will help you understand how they study best.

Why? By knowing your child’s learning style, you can help establish the most appropriate strategies to help them study - and even enjoy the process!

5 CULTIVATE A LOVE OF LEARNING, RIGHT FROM THE VERY START!When children feel safe, nurtured, stimulated and most importantly, enjoy the activities they are engaged in, they are more likely to retain information and feel motivat-ed to learn further.

Why? As soon as learning begins to feel like a chore; something that leads to admo-nition or punishment if action or results are not as parents or teachers expect, this can lead to a loss of self-esteem and confidence, causing children to become anxious, disinterested and demotivated to learn.

6 ENCOURAGING A LOVE FOR LEARNING THROUGH PLAYThis lays the strongest foundation for enjoyment of learning as a child develops. When you create a little art corner at home for instance; a special place where your child is surrounded by paint, paper, colouring books and crayons, and can scribble away as far as

their imagination takes them, you are helping them develop vital skills that they take with them into school and beyond. You help them determine their own attitude towards learning.

7 MAINTAIN A REGULAR ROUTINEIncorporate your child’s learning style into a healthy daily routine that breaks study periods, or homework, into well-or-ganised, manageable chunks. Ensure your child drinks plenty of water throughout the day, eats regular healthy meals and includes plenty of sleep! Allow for downtime, which includes time spent outdoors so your child gets plenty of fresh air. Limit the amount of time time spent watching TV but don’t stop your child from watching their favourite programme.

Why? If we do this, we deprive them of the things that help them unwind and relax, as well as the activities, that stimulate them most and actually aid learning.

When exams are round the corner, don’t stop your child from attending regular activities, whether creative enrichment programmes or sports activities just because they have a test or exam coming up. It is tempting to

change our child’s regular routine and force them into an unnatural form of study mode, depriving them of everything that is fun in their weekly routine.

EXPERT: Fiona Walker, Principal of Schools / CEO of Julia Gabriel Education

8 WORK ON TASKS AT SPECIFIC TIMES OF THE DAYBuilding the routine allows for them to build a schema into their brain that it is time to focus on something else other that what they are busy with right now. It is very much the same rationale as how we build sleep routines when they were younger so that they learn to train the body and mind to slow down before bedtime.

9 REWARD THEM FOR THEIR EFFORTAll children like a good challenge and one that rewards them. Work in ways to enhance and build confidence into the child. Stickers work wonders too!

EXPERT: Esther Lim, CEO and Founder of LEAP SchoolHouse Education

This article was first published in The New Age Parents e-maga-zine Oct / Nov 2014 issue.


EEG BIOFEEDBACK SPECIAL

Is Your

Concentrating?

HavingChild Problems


What is EEGElectroencephalography (EEG) is the recording of the brain’s spontaneous elec-trical activity over a period of time.EEG Biofeedback (also known as Neurofeedback), is a type of biofeedback that uses real-time displays of brain activity. It also trains the brain to learn through self-regulation, which helps the brain to learn to func-tion more efficiently.

How it is measuredA few electrodes or sensors are strategically placed on the scalp to measure the brain’s electrical flow, also known as brain waves. In EEG biofeedback, the Beta, Delta, Theta and High Beta waves are measured. As your child is engaged in a certain activity, these four types of brain waves are converted into visual signals onto the screen, which are measured in real-time.

How long is one session?Each session is 1 hour long and divided into two parts: Active training and Sleep therapy/training. In active training session, the thera-pist will work with child on the prevailing issue, such

“Distracted… and not paying at-tention in class…” When Angela

received feedback from her 5 year old daughter’s preschool teach-

ers, she knew she had to do some-thing. That’s when she discovered

EEG Biofeedback.


FRONTAL LOBE

PARIETAL LOBE

TEMPORAL LOBE

OCCIPITAL LOBE

as a lack of focus or having difficulties to read (dyslexia). In the sleep training section, your child will learn how to ‘activate’ their Delta waves, (which is also known as the sleep brain waves).

How the brain worksOur brain is divided into four major lobes - frontal, parietal, temporal and occipital. Specific

points in our brain process different cognitive functions.

What An EEG Session Looks LikeDuring the active training session, your child will be tasked to play certain games, read online stories and watch snippets of video clips on the computer. Each activity has a specific goal to meet, which

the therapist will encourage and guide your child to work towards. Based on the pre-as-sessment session, the ther-apist will chart out certain benchmarks on the specific areas of improvement.

How we ‘activate’ our brain can be changed When Angela first heard about EEG Biofeedback, she

FRONTAL LOBE - controls how we process, organise, analyse and act on information

PARIETAL LOBE - controls the expressive language ability and processing of body senses

TEMPORAL LOBE - controls our memory ability and comprehension of language

OCCIPITAL LOBE - deals with our visual perception and how we identify and recognise objects


was rather sceptical about it. Because EEG is suitable for all age groups, Angela’s husband decided to give it a try to answer her doubts. “He attended the preview session, got an initial assess-ment on his brain waves, re-tried it again after some interventions, we saw the positive effects! Seeing is indeed believing.” She was convinced and enrolled her 5 year old daughter, Tze Yun into the program.

How does it help my child to focus better?After 3 months, her daugh-ter was more attentive and participative in class. Another plus point was Tze Yun’s sleeping habit. “Before EEG, it might have taken me 2 hours to settle her down to sleep. After EEG, she can sleep on her own within 30 minutes.”

It helps children with Special NeedsBesides improved attention and focus, EEG Biofeedback helps, alertness, speech, language comprehension, motor performance. It also helps to improve your child’s sleep and reduce stress and anxiety. A few parents who have

children diagnosed with special needs have also tried the EEG Feedback on their child. The responses from these parents have been positive and most saw an improvement in their child’s behaviours. One mother shares, “Joeny was diagnosed with dyslexia when he was in Primary 1. Even when we started our first EEG test session, I had begun to notice slight changes in him. In the past, he used to struggle with reading the words and therefore, had a hard time processing information. However, after the sessions, he slowly started to make the effort to think and digest what he read or heard. Gradually he became more outspoken.”

A better understanding of your childReviews are conducted with parents at the end of one cycle (10 sessions) to give parents a better understanding of the child’s progress. “What I like about the program is the individu-alised support and feedback after every 10 sessions. The EEG therapist would explain to me Tze Yun’s brain wave readings from the begin-ning to her 10th session. Then she would break down

the results and explain to me their analysis and ob-servations of her progress. It is through these review sessions that I gained a clearer understanding of my daughter’s progress and how she has improved.”

“More importantly, I’ve learnt her lack of focus and at-tention span was not just be-cause of a stand-alone factor, but due to other contributing factors such as her anxiety lev-el, how tired she is at that mo-ment in time, and her habitual tendencies to have a ‘dreamy’ mind. This is definitely a more effective way compared to my naggings!”

Interested to find out more? Book a preview session to assess your child’s brain activity.

Add: 135 Jurong Gateway Road #04-355 Singapore 600135 Tel: 65607050 Email: [email protected]: www.eegbiofeed-back.com.sg

EEG BIOFEEDBACK SPECIAL


Congratulations to Seth Loh Kang En!

Besides being featured on our coverpage, he walks away with a professional photo shoot by Yew Kwang Photography worth $168 and a Huawei Ascend P7 (Black)

worth $699.

Parenting With Love 2015 Coverpage Contest

COVERPAGE MODEL

Coverpage Contest prizes are proudly sponosred by Huawei Singapore and Photography by Yew Kwang.


EMOTIONAL

Coping with Competition in School

COMPETITION COPE RED


Primary school children are expected to perform well on standardized assessments, in addition to their classroom work. This environment lends itself to comparison and com-petition across peer groups as children often become aware of how their classmates are performing.

Adults have the ability to look beyond the grades and understand that they are only an evaluation of one aspect of achievement or intelligence. However, children may become too focused on their results on assessments, and may start to base their self-worth or self-esteem on the grades they achieve.

This may be especially true if other children in the environ-ment are talking about their scores, or if teachers are putting emphasis on these assessments.

COMPETITION AT HOMEThis competitive atmosphere may also be apparent at home if children are comparing themselves with their siblings, or if parents emphasize heavily on achieving high scores. As a result, sibling rivalry may occur. When children feel the pressure to succeed, they may need help in understanding what competition is about and the skills needed to cope with the stress it brings.

Here are eight strategies parents can do to help children cope with the pressure.

The Singapore school setting is a competitive one, starting at a very young age. Dr Alison Roy, Clinical Psychologist at the VA Psychology Center shares with us ways parents can help their child cope with the pressure to succeed in a competitive atmosphere.


❶ “Did you give your all?”Ask your child, “Did you study, prepare, or research enough? If children are prepared, but didn’t achieve the desired results, they can feel assured that they did their best. Help them to understand that everyone has different learning capacities, capabilities and lev-els of intelligence. If they have given their best, let them know they have performed to their best ability on a particular task. Brainstorm with them for good study habits, to encourage them to keep trying despite the disappointment.

❷ Healthy competi-tion can be goodHelp your child understand that competition can be something that motivates and drives us to do our best. Explain to them the difference between healthy competition

and unhealthy competition. Healthy competition – is when we use it to push ourselves fur-ther; to do more and step out of our comfort zone. Unhealthy competition – normally leaves us with a sour aftertaste; makes us feel bad about ourselves.

Give children possible scenarios in different aspects of life. One of the examples of healthy competition is Sports. Athletes need to practice con-sistently and learn new skills in order to keep up or be better than their opponents. Com-peting with other individuals drives athletes to train harder and perform better.

❸ Laugh, then learn A good life skill parents can model and teach is to first make light of failure then examine it for areas to improve and learn from. You can use an example from your own life at work or home. You can also use

life stories of famous personal-ities. For example, Walt Disney and Michael Jordan; both men failed many times before they became incredibly successful. How does your child view failure? Teach them to view it as an opportunity to do better next time, and not as the end of the world.

❹ Highlight strengths and be honest about weaknesses Every child has an area that they are competent in. Find it and once you do, don’t stop there. Find ways to let them show off their skills. Not all of life has to be academic; think about their interests, what excites them or what they love. Self-esteem is not just connected to one aspect of our life – children should not base everything on academic grades. There are also other avenues such as extracurricular activities, sports, arts, drama and others.

It’s important that your children get positive affirma-tion and encouragement from you. It is fine to be up front with your child if you think they are underachieving. It is also acceptable to point out your child’s weaknesses. Talk about how their weaknesses may affect them daily, in their relationships with others, and how they can improve. If children have the opportunity to learn about their weakness-

EMOTIONAL


es in a safe and supportive environment, they are often more open to accept and work on them.

❺ Importance of family support Interests vary from child to child. Find out the interests of each child and talk as a family about each individual’s strengths and interests. Your older boy might be an athletic sportsman but your younger son may love robotics. Attend each other’s events as a family and use that as a platform to teach and show your support for them. If you notice sibling ri-valry, encourage your children to talk to one another. Finally, don’t compare your children in an argument and don’t let siblings compare one another in an argument either.

❻ Set small achievable goals“Where do you want to be at the end of the week, month, term or year? How do you plan to get there?” Help your child set little goals for the school year. For younger children, don’t look too far ahead. For older children, its age appro-priate to ask more questions about their goals in the future. For example, do they want to go to university or pursue higher education? What do they need to do now in order to set themselves up for future success in the field they want

to be in? Find neat and interesting

ways to celebrate the little goals as a whole family. Make other family members aware of each other’s goals by display-ing them in the house and once someone achieves one of the goals, celebrate together with a special family dinner or outing.

❼ Emphasize other positive attributes In addition to academic achievements, emphasize the importance of other qualities that make them good individu-als. Model and teach kindness, cooperation, care, generosity and other positive attributes with your children. These skills will make them well round-ed contributors to society. Sometimes the best qualities in a person are the ones that are hardest to assess, but they may make the biggest impact.

❽ Relaxation techniquesThe more pressure a child feels to succeed, the more stressed they may become, which could in turn affect future perfor-mance. Make it a family activity to learn relaxation techniques together. Discuss what helps each family member to relax. Deep breathing and progres-sive muscle relaxation are two skills children can understand and utilize.

Relaxation techniques are

helpful to use before an exam or new day to stay relaxed and ready to tackle anything. Practice relaxation techniques while studying for exams or preparing for an important competition. Relaxation can also be practiced every day at bedtime to help children fall asleep.

Dr. Alison Roy has a doctorate in Clinical Psychology (Psy.D.) from Antioch Uni-versity New England in New Hampshire, USA. Dr. Alison and her family moved abroad to Prague, Czech Republic in the Fall of 2012, where she consulted with several international schools about starting psychological services for their students from the ground up. She is now a Clinical Psychologist at VA Psychology Center.


EMOTIONAL


Stress can add upAnxiety, expectations, and stress are generally associat-ed with examination. Such factors can add unnecessary pressure for the children and sometimes, such influences can result in some giving up on themselves. Maturity, persever-ance, personalities, and other aspects ultimately determine if the child goes in the right direction but in reality, not every child has this critical mix to move forward. Every child copes differently but guidance is undeniably essential, and parents can definitely help their children manage in many ways.

What can affect a child’s ability?There are many things that par-ents can do that would not add to their stress. A balance of dif-ferent strategies can be used -

Are you reliev-ing exam stress for your child or guilty of over stressing them? Caroline Yeung investigates and shares important points to look out for.


some pertaining to guiding the child in maintaining healthy lifestyles and habits - while oth-ers pertaining to helping the child develop or adopt more efficient study strategies over time, can help them to unleash their potential. Parents can also ensure that the environment is conducive for studying (with-out having the child to leave the house to go elsewhere).Here are ten points to note.

1. Understand your child’s limitParents must be able to understand their children’s academic limit, and thereafter set a realistic expectation for their potential achievement.

This expectation should remain consistent for the academic year. Parents must not overly pressurize their children espe-cially during the examination period. Instead, they should focus on strategizing and guid-ing their children throughout or whenever challenges arise.

2. Ensure sufficient sleepParents should encourage their children to go to bed early especially during the examina-tion period. Sleep is important as it ensures a proper mind and body development. Sleep deprivation can create stress, and affect temperament and learning. Also, sleep recharges

the brain, and it can help to keep the child alert.

3. Allow your child to restChildren cannot study continuously just like adults cannot work ceaselessly. Rest can ensure efficiency and productivity so parents must ensure that they provide their children with such critical rest. A quick game, music or snack break should be allowed for the children. Parents must realize that their children are not machines, and they need rest and replenishment just like any human beings – without such rest, children would not be able to accomplish much.

EMOTIONAL


4. Be realistic about online gamingOnline gaming can become an unavoidable issue for parents. Peer influence has a definite impact even if the parents try to block their children from online gaming. Hence, parents must ensure that they set boundaries right at the beginning. What is the allow-ance during leisure time and examination period? Stress can result when conflicts arise due to disagreement, and having such a struggle may not be appropriate during examina-tion time.

5. Teach the funnel process The overall information will always appear overwhelming in the beginning for any child. Without guidance, some children would simply stay lost, get discouraged and give up trying their best. Parents must seize opportunities to guide their children to sift through large amount of details and search for critical information to retain. This is a process that must be consistently taught. In due time, the child will under-stand the logic and they will find such process beneficial.

6. Ensure an accurate content focusParents should encourage their children to identify the important content. Instead of

being lost in the entire chapter, children should be guided to identify such critical content. In addition, parents should highlight the importance of analytical learning or under-standing versus committing the content to memory.

7. Handle the basics firstParents can assist the child to find help in understanding difficult questions, topics or chapters. Children who find themselves unable to cope at this first level will usually lose interest after some time. As such, this first base can become an obstructing hurdle for them.

8. Distinguish the approachParents can help children to understand why they should approach tests and exams differently. Tests are usually associated with fewer chapters while examinations are linked to more topics. As a result, chil-dren should be guided to focus on critical chapter summaries (instead of spending substan-

tial time at the chapter level during examination time) as this may be the most efficient way to handle examination.

9. Ensure minimum distractionFamily members can work together to ensure that there is minimum household noise or distraction during this pe-riod. They should be mindful of any arguments, celebra-tions, television watching as these activities can create potential disturbance for the children.

10. Provision of study spaceParents must make provision for a quiet corner or room for their children to study. This is the basic requirement for children to deal with exam-ination challenges. Allocated spaces are critical for the children to manage their progress. Children would become very distracted and disoriented if they have to move consistently from one spot to the next.

PARENTS MUST SEIZE OPPORTUNI-TIES TO GUIDE THEIR CHILDREN TO SIFT THROUGH LARGE AMOUNT OF DETAILS AND SEARCH FOR CRITI-CAL INFORMATION TO RETAIN.


STRESS BUSTERS

FOR KIDSBy Dorothea Chow


#1 Deep BreathingAs the name

suggests, encourage your child to take deep breaths of air, breathing in until her lungs and belly feel completely filled up, paus-ing for a short while, then exhaling slowly until all the air is out, before taking in the next breath. Keep the mouth closed and only breathe in and out through the nose. To help your child visualize what deep breathing looks like, ask them to imagine their stomach is like a balloon that is filling up with air (as they breathe in) then deflating (as they breathe out).

Tip Intentionally slowing down

our breathing helps the body to calm down as the heart beat rate slows, blood pressure comes down, and tense muscles relax. As they are breathing in, you can ask them to imag-ine they are breathing in good stuff such as courage, love, peace

and faith. When they breathe out, ask them to imagine they are expelling the bad stuff, such as fear, frustration and anger.

#2 Listen To MusicStudies show

that listening to soothing forms of music lower the heart rate, blood pres-sure, and stress-hormone levels, bringing down the extreme levels of your cur-rent mood. Classical music is an obvious choice. You and your child can listen to it together before bed or in the car.

Tip Different types of music appeal

to different kids. He may like pop music or rock music too. Ask your child how he feels as he listens to the mu-sic – does he feel calm? Happy? Angry?

#3 Body Awareness Ask your child to

lie back – on a sofa or bed,

or even on the floor at home – and to close their eyes, and imagine that they are asleep. Starting from the legs and ending with the head, ask them to slowly relax each part of the body, allowing it to “sink” deeper into the surface beneath him. Take your time for this activity. Once the whole body is relaxed, keep this calm state for a while before slowly “waking up” those body parts again.

#4 Express CreativelyWhat words some-

times cannot express or heal, creative expression can. Give your child the tools to draw, paint, or create something to express how he is feeling. You’ll be surprised how the answer might be hidden where he least expects it.

Tip If your child enjoys making

music or writing po-etry, let her compose whatever she fancies, bringing her feelings up to the surface, and out through her music.


also help parents understand their children better.

“I realized many children simply follow instructions, without having a voice of their own. We decided to come up with a programme where children were free to share their ideas, yet provid-ing a structure, so that they can do so in an orderly and consistent manner. We have various themes throughout the year to follow, but in a class, teachers provide them with choices to make their own decisions.” Rena adds.

Mother Melissa Foo was already keen on enrolling her son Zachary for art lessons. But she did not “want a teach-er who would just draw, paint or colour something for him to show me every week.” After 20 minutes into Zachary’s trial class at heART Studio, she signed him up on the spot for a semester, and has not regretted a moment of it.

“I used to think that art classes were a waste of money. Now, my boy has developed an interest in this area and he has improved tremendously, not just in his learning and fine motor skills, he is also able to concentrate better and has grown to be a more confi-dent boy.”

HEART STUDIO SPECIAL

A HEART for ART

Rena saw how her boy’s spirit got weakened day by day after he came back from school. She knew

if there was one thing that would perk her little boy’s spirt, it was his interest in drawing. And

that was how heART Studio was formed.

Why Art?Rena Chew started the studio with the pure intention of helping her eldest son Elijah, gain some confidence. He loved to draw and she saw

that it gave him immense joy and was a great confi-dence-booster. Her mission was not just to bring art to parents and show them how it can benefit their child, but


Art is for EveryoneheART Studio opens their door to children with special needs. In her studio, Rena has students with Autism, ADHD and sen-sory disorder. She tells parents honestly that although her art teachers have no formal train-ing in dealing with children with special needs, what they do have to offer is - their patience, love and understanding. Stu-dents with special needs have one-to-one sessions until they are comfortable and ready to join their peers for a combined class. The maximum teacher to child ratio is 1:6.

ProgrammeEach child is given their own journal, where each week’s work will be kept in a sequential manner. It will cover the various kinds of art medium used and new knowledge learnt. The older children are encouraged to write on their own plans and ideas in their journal, to help retain what they have learnt and also to develop their literacy and writing skills.

Each week’s lesson is progressive; built upon what was learnt the week before. And if your child misses a lesson, the studio will follow up with a make-up lesson so that your child does not get left behind.

Little Botero (3 – 4 years)Little Dali (4-5 years)Little Picasso (5.5 – 7 years)Young Van Gogh (7.5 – 12 years)Duration: 1hr 15mins (Once a week)Schedule: Wednesday to Sunday

Teaching Art from the HeartRena’s nurturing nature and passion for art is evident in her team of ded-icated full-time teachers, who are graduates from LASALLE College of the Arts or Nanyang Acade-

my of Fine Arts. Melissa shares her fondness for one of the teachers. “Zachary’s teacher, Syafiq, is wonderful with children, with a genuine passion for art which rubs off on the children. My son is very happy and comfortable with him, and I could not praise Syafiq enough. The teachers here are excellent and highly professional.”

Add: heART Studio LLP, 1 Charlton Lane #01-04 , Singa-pore 539631Tel: (65) 6554 7563Email: [email protected]: www.heartstudiosg.comFacebook: www.facebook.com/pages/Heart-Studio-Sin-gapore

Kyle and Teacher Jay. Read more about Kyle’s art journey at Mummy Ting’s blog, miracule.blogspot.sg


SOCIAL

This Time I’ll Be Ready…andBULLY PROOF!TIPS ON HOW TO BULLY PROOF YOUR CHILD


8-year old Jenny has not been herself lately. She has been more moody than usual and tends to get annoyed easily at her family members.

She recently started to say things like “Nobody loves

me” and “I am stupid”. Jenny’s mother has also noticed that she has been eating more

than usual but did not make much of it. She believed

that Jenny is probably just going through a growth spurt. Several weeks later, Jenny be-gins to refuse going to school

New school, new friends. It’s a social jungle out there. What hap-pens when your child is bullied or ostracized? As parents, should we always step in to resolve their issues at school? Dr Vanessa von Auer, Clinical Psychologist and Director at the VA Psychology Center shares her insights with us.

and when she does she spends most of her time at the sick bay. When her teacher finally sits down with Jenny and asks her about what has been going on, Jenny breaks down and shares the consistent bullying she has been receiving from a specific group of girls in her class.

A Global EpidemicBullying is an epidemic among school-aged children. In fact, globally, 57% of girls and 43% of boys have reported being bullied (Child Helpline International, 2013). It is a phe-nomenon that can have severe consequences on a child’s short as well as long-term emotional health and personal development. Parents may not always take bullying seriously or just do not fully understand what it is. However, shockingly, bullying is the third leading cause of death in teens. It is vital that parents learn to identify forms of bullying and to bully proof their child, so that they can protect themselves.

What is Bullying?Bullying is not just light-heart-ed teasing. It is defined as aggressive and/or intimidating behavior that causes distress or harm in the victim. It often involves humiliating the victim and is repeated over time. If a child is treated badly once by his peer, this would not be considered bullying.

What Types of Bullying Exist?The most visible form is direct bullying. This form of bullying may consist of physical actions (i.e., hitting and punching), taunting or name-calling, and threaten-ing the victim. The other form is less visible and is known as indirect bullying. Indirect bullying may consist of shun-ning, out-casting, spreading rumors and cyberbullying.

What Can Parents Do?How can you tell if your child is a victim of bullying and what are some things you can do before it happens?

1. ALWAYS ENCOURAGE OPEN CONVERSATIONS Many bully victims (especially young ones) will not disclose to parents how hard their social life in school is because they themselves may not under-stand what they are experienc-ing or, they are embarrassed to talk about it. The best way to find out what is going on in your child’s life is to make time to chat.

There is an art to making conversations with your child. Do not ask leading questions (questions that suggest the an-swers you want) or closed-end-ed questions (questions which just require ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers). This way, you will never find out how your child is doing


emotionally. Make sure you provide a safe environment where open communication can take place.

2. DO NOT INTERVENE (UNLESS ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY)Too many parents tend to bubble wrap their children by jumping in every chance they get to resolve peer conflict on their behalf. In fact, this is not helpful at all. If parents attempt to rescue their child from every uncomfortable situation, they will never be able to stand up for them-selves and cope.

Instead, help to bully-proof your child by educating them on how to spot a bully, and set boundaries by either ignoring the bully and removing themselves from a potential bullying situation. Your children should be encouraged to ask for help when they feel they are in danger.

3. BODY LANGUAGETeach your child to be aware of their own body language. Bullies are masters at select-ing “weak people” to pick on. Physical appearances such as slouching, avoid-ing eye contact, speaking softly are indicators of low self-esteem, which is a bully magnet.

In front of the mirror, show your child how to display confident body language. Finally, together with them, design a safety plan in case your child does get exposed to bullying. This plan should entail how to get away from the bully and whom (friends or teachers) to approach for immediate assistance.

4. OBSERVE YOUR CHILD’S BEHAVIORSIf talking is not getting you anywhere, watch out for these changes in behavior:�More moodiness than is

typical Sleep difficulties Feeling unhappyOver or under eating�Withdrawing from the

family�Demonstrating more

clinginess to family members

�Demonstrating more anxiety than usual

�School refusal, lower grades

�Avoiding to talk about school

Talking about not having friends, being stupid, etc.If these behaviors are consis-tent, it may be time to take action. Ask the school for as-sistance or seek professional help from a psychologist to help your child cope with their experiences at school.

SOCIAL

Dr Vanessa von Auer, Clinical Psychologist of the VA Psycholo-gy Center and Princi-pal of the Integrated International School has a decade of ex-perience and knowl-edge in the field of child and family therapy as well as special education. She has spent her career helping par-ents learn effective parenting strategies, has helped children process their emo-tional difficulties in healthy ways and has helped families grow closer together.


⓵ LEADERS WORK COLLECTIVELY.

BULLIES WANT POWER.Does your child often under-mine someone else’s work to “look good” in front of you or his teacher?

⓶ LEADERS USE AUTHORITY RE-

SPONSIBLY. BULLIES ABUSE AUTHORITY.Does your child speak impe-riously? Does he often inter-

rupt classmates before they have finished speaking? Does he tend to keep the best for himself? Is he hesitant to al-low anyone to do something he thinks may rebound on him and show him up in bad light should it fail?

⓷ LEADERS SEE OTHERS’ POINTS

OF VIEW. BULLIES LACK EMPATHY.Do other children complain

your child is unapproachable, intimidating or not open?

⓸ LEADERS INSPIRE AND ENCOURAGE.

BULLIES USE STICKS INSTEAD OF CARROTS.Does your child find it difficult to genuinely enjoy someone else’s success or to honestly commend some-one for their work? Does he often resort to veiled warnings of unpleasant con-sequences to get his way?

⓹ LEADERS KNOW AND DISCERN

THEIR TEAMMATES. BULLIES ARE UNPERCEPTIVE.Can your child list three strengths and weaknesses of each of his friends?

At what point does your child take off the straight and narrow and start veering towards more dangerous territory? Here are five warning signs and differences between a bul-ly and a leader.

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN

Leaders and BulliesBy Devyani Borade


SAYING NO TO

CliqueConflicts

PEER PRESSURE


UNDERSTANDING PEER PRESSUREChildren give in to peer pressure for many reasons; to fit in, to be liked by oth-ers and not to be made a joke of. The herd mentality may give the false impres-sion that since others are doing it, what’s wrong with doing it too? Since others all have an iPhone, I should be entitled to have it too.

It is hard to be the only one who says "no" to peer pressure. The child would need to be in tune with his or her own values and beliefs and the self-confi-dence to be firm and walk away. It is helpful to have one or two friends who also believe in the same values. This decreases the power of

peer pressure. As children are still build-

ing their identity and their discerning skills are still being developed, parents need to be aware and help children protect them-selves and handle difficult situations.

1Strengthen your Relationship

Being close to your child will make your child more willing to listen and accept your views and values. You can be a source of support to your child in handling peer pressure. If you are close, your child will be more accepting when you point out the bad habits you have issue with from their clique.

When your child enters Primary School, they will

meet and make new friends and from their own cliques in

school. Cliques may not necessarily be all bad. But

what if your child is picking up some bad habits from

their new group of friends? By Som Yew Ya

2 Build on your Child’s Self

ConfidenceChildren with good self-es-teem and positive self-worth are more inclined to befriend good role models. They will also be more confident in resisting peer pressure. Build on your child's strengths; praise and affirm their achievements and self-worth.

3 Talk about Peer Pressure

Talk to your child about the challenges of peer pres-sure. Help them under-stand that some people may not like their choice, but there are others who may support or feel the same way. Friends may respect a different decision, and not all people have the courage to resist peer pressure. Friends who make others do things they are uncomfortable with may not be a true friend.

4 Set a Good Example

Be a good role model. If you encourage your child not to pick up certain vices such as smoking, using vulgarities, gambling or drinking, you too, should walk the talk. Giving up your bad habits will make a deep impact on your children. Likewise, as parents we should not


be striving to keep up with other parents.

5 Be Connected to your Child and

their FriendsBe in tune with your child by making time to

communicate with them frequently. In this manner, you will be more aware of what’s happening in their life, and potential peer pressure issues that might surface. When discussing these issues, remember to be sensitive and not to make judgements immedi-ately. Overreacting or being dismissive will just break the communication.

It is also helpful to get to know your child's friends. This will give you a chance to discern their character and values, and the influence

they have on your child. And even if you do not

agree with your child’s choice of friends, refrain from alienating them

entirely.

6 Teach your Child to

Analyse If you have set some

limits for your child (e.g. no overnight stays or no buying of certain products), explain your decisions instead of just saying "no". It is important for them to understand, so that they can learn how to discern for them-selves. Help your child to develop de-cision making skills by guiding them to

analyse the consequences of their own decisions. Hav-ing the capacity to make their own decisions can be empowering, and lessens the likelihood of others making decisions on their behalf.

7 Teach your Child How to Say No

Saying “no” or walking away from situations can be very difficult, even for adults. If your child dislikes certain activities that his or her friends are doing, you can try to role-play with your child on the appropri-ate responses when faced with such requests. For ex-ample, you can pretend to be your child’s friends and enact a possible scenario in class. From the role play, help your child develop his or her response.

8 Set BoundariesIf your child has to come

in constant contact with a group you feel is a bad influ-ence for your child (i.e. same project team or same class), set limits and practise bound-aries. For example, it is okay to interact in class, but your permission is needed to hang out after school. Sharing knowledge and helping each other with homework is fine, but lending and allowing your homework to be copied is another.


Not many of us dream of our children being prom queen or being crowned Mr Popular, but I daresay we all want them to have their own circle of trusted, good* friends, ones they can share their lives with and on whom they can count for help in times of trouble

Helping Your Child To Make FriendsNobody Likes Me

Making friends seems to come very naturally and easily for some children, especially those who have a more

outgoing and easy-going nature. However, it is not unusual for children to struggle with making friends,

and to be overwhelmed by conflict situations. After all, even we adults often find it daunting to start new

friendships and manage differences in opinion.By Dorothea Chow


While teachers play an im-portant role in teaching our children valuable social skills in the classroom and at play, parents play an instrumental role in modeling for and coaching their children in the art of making friends.

PREPARE YOUR CHILDEven if your child is a natural extrovert, there’s no harm in giving him a heads up about what to expect in a new social settings, such as the first day of school or attending a friend’s birthday party. Let him know that there will many unfamiliar people to meet, and encourage him to make a new friend. Some chil-dren may need more advance notice of such potentially stressful scenarios, even up to a few days in advance of the event.

TALK IT THROUGHIf you already know that your child is prone to be aggressive in his play, you can remind him that hurting people is a strict no-no. Con-versely, if she is very reserved and shy with new people, talk her through what she can say or do if she wants to join in a game. For example being brave enough to ask the oth-er kids if she can join in. And if she is stuck in a situation and needs help, make sure she knows who to ask for help, like a teacher or trusted adult.

DON’T ASSUMESometimes we “let go” of our kids too much too soon. Let their experience teach them in the art of making friends. “They’ll learn,” we say, “let them figure it out on their own.” Now, I am not advocat-ing for helicopter parenting, and I agree that there is some truth in that statement, but from personal experi-ence with my own children that sometimes, they really DON’T get it.

And if some of these social cues and norms are not ex-plained explicitly to the child at a young age, they will make their own interpreta-tions and draw their conclu-sions, which will then set the tone for how they approach future relationships.

GET TO KNOW THEIR PARENTSMake the effort to become familiar with, if not friends with, the parents of your children’s friends. There’s nothing quite like knowing the parent to understand their child. Along the way, pick up ideas and perspec-tives on parenting, see your child through others’ eyes, and enlist their cooperation in helping your kids work through issues that might crop up. Young children, unlike teenagers, may feel safe and secure knowing that their parents are connected.

DON’T RUSH YOUR CHILDEvery child is different. Just because another child has made friends with his entire class within a week and your child has only made one new friend doesn’t mean your child is socially inept or awkward. Each child may warm up to new people at a different pace. Some children prefer to be friends with everybody, while others just need their small circle of two to three friends to feel like they belong.

SHARE ABOUT YOUR OWN FRIENDSHIPSYour child probably looks up to you as his or her hero in life, and may think that Daddy and Mummy make it look so easy to make friends. Little do they know that you and I have also struggled with making friends – and proba-bly still do! It can be helpful to share about your own fears and how you manage them in a social setting. You can even share memories from your own childhood, when you had a fight with your best friend, or when you were scared on the first day of school and how you coped.

*The definition of a “good” friend may vary for each individual and family. It’s best to sit down to discuss with your spouse and kids what characteristics to look out for in a good friend.


As parents, have you been at a moment in time where you looked at your child and stole a secret smile to yourself? Esther Lim, CEO and Founder of LEAP SchoolHouse had one such moment the day when she attended her daughter’s Primary One orientation.

From Kindergarten

My Daughter’s

to PrimarySchoolJourney

SCHOOL


THE BEGINNING There she was, one minute, with me holding her little hand and leading her up to her new class. The next, as we turned round the corridor, she let go of me, smiled and went off to her classroom to join her new teacher and classmates. At that point, I wondered if I had really been there for her and prepared her for this new chapter in her life. The rational side of me was telling me to get a grip but the emotional side of me was well, too emotive to accept that it is time to let my child have a chance to experience a new learning journey.

COPING WITH HOMEWORKI was concerned that Liv will find that something tough to handle. However, learning to cope with the idea of homework was not as big a challenge as I thought it would be for both Liv and me. We both worked out a routine and schedule and with some strict discipline at the beginning to keep to the task or tasks, we managed along the way.

I made Liv learn to be responsible for her own schoolbag. This included the homework she would have to complete even before I come home from work. On

days with no homework, she does ‘mummy’s homework’ which could include some reading time on her own or just a page or two of some assignment book bought off the shelves.

I was quite adamant that Liv does not end up with tons of tuition. She needs and deserves a childhood. We work hard on weekdays and on weekends, we tend to go and enjoy family time. When there are tests due, she understands that she needs to put in the effort. It is not how many full marks she gets, she is made to understand that best effort is the ‘best mark’.

STUMBLING WITH CHINESE Liv was not too proficient in Chinese. In fact, after her first term in school, she was ‘identified’ to attend remedial classes for Chinese. She was not willing and was in fact very upset. Still it was a learning curve for the little one who had to see that to get out of an unpleasant situation; she had to work herself out of it. Together, we set out a task to try and im-prove on her Chinese grades so that she could drop out of the remedial by the end of the semester.

It was not easy for Liv but at the same time, I saw a form of determination I have

never seen in Liv before. She could work on a task for an hour straight just to get it right. She kept on reworking on some things she had dif-ficulty in. I will never forget the pride in her voice when she called me at work to tell me that she had passed her Chinese spelling test with full marks. Liv tasted what success meant then. To me, that was the learning point.

FRIENDS How do you tell your child that real friends will not make you do things you don’t want to do? That was a hard struggle. One day, I found her counting out money from her piggy bank. On further probing she told me, with tears in her eyes that her ‘best’ friend in school told her that she must buy her things from the bookshop or she will not be her friend anymore. She had been foregoing recess money to ‘buy’ friendship.

It was tempting as a mother to just jump right in and take over the situation; complain to the teacher, the school principal and even demand to speak to the oth-er child’s parents. All those thoughts crossed my mind. I could not stand the thought that my child had been a victim of a bully. She had not had recess for a week! That was unforgivable!


Liv told me she was scared to tell me because she knew that I had always forbid her to spend at the bookshop. She looked at me with her tear-filled eyes and was looking for answers on what to do. I told her calmly that she needed to stand up for herself this time and tell her friend, that she was getting her into trouble with me. A good friend will not do that. ‘Liv, you need to be brave’, I said.

It was a painful (and hun-gry) lesson but an important learning point. For me, it was also a lesson to be picked up as a parent. I learnt when to step back and let go. I trust

Liv also picked up an import-ant lesson that day when she stood up for herself. Weeks later from this incident, Liv

told me that this particu-lar friend of hers is going round and giving ‘presents’ to make new best friends. I asked her how she felt.

‘You do not need to give your friend anything if she is your real friend,’ that was Liv’s response.

ACCEPTING FAILURELiv was selected to sing solo for her P1 concert to be held at the end of the year. Boy, was I elated! I mean, I was even more excited that she was! However, 2 weeks into practice, she told me that her teacher got someone else to audition for her role. I found out later that she had been complacent and was not giving her best during practice. She was disappointed but she acted nonchalant about things. She thought if she were to

SCHOOL


try hard again, she will get back the role. The teacher was not too convinced.

Learning to fall and being able to accept that setbacks in life is inevitable is tough on a 7 year old. She is still grappling with the concept of having to accept failure. Should I cushion that fall? Hard to turn our backs on it but we have to. In the long run, Liv needs to see that that is part of life.

THEN AND NOW…One year on, I see Liv trans-forming from a young girl to

a little young lady. She has matured from the highs and the lows in school. She was blessed with a great form teacher, Madam Hana and under her tutelage; Liv is starting to mould her own personality and strengths in character. Having a teacher, who understands my child and truly believes that to teach is to touch lives, really makes the transition for me as a parent having a kid in primary school so much easier.

Liv’s P1 concert is coming soon and I have a strong

sense that she is not going to be singing solo for me that day but I do strongly know in my heart that she will be surrounded by good friendship and self-confi-dence. With that thought, I sense a secret smile form-ing…

Esther dedicates this article to the teachers at CHIJ Katong (Primary), especially to Madam Hana.This article was first published on The New Age Parents e-magazine (Dec 12 / Jan 13). Photos courtesy of Esther Lim. Reprinted with permission.


Not every cooking project in the kitch-en has to end up as a disaster. Let the dedicated bakers and teachers at Ge-nius R Us help you.

OVER 100 RECIPES TO LEARN AND TRYWith more than 100 recipes (and counting!) for cookies, cakes, muffins, and savoury treats to make and bake, coupled with easy-to-follow instructions, it’s no surprise that their recipes are a hit.

MORE THAN JUST BAKINGApart from providing kids with a platform where their interest in baking can be dis-covered and honed, Genius R Us is a baking cove where kids build their confidence and learn skills beyond the perimeter of a classroom.

GENIUS R US SPECIAL

DURING THIS PROCESS, THEY LEARN ABOUT: Basic arithmetic Learn to count, tell apart units of measurement, and fractions (i.e. pouring a quar-ter cup of flour)

Science and general knowledge Learn how to use different equipment and kitchen tools safely, with supervision

Social and language skillsPick up and use words per-taining to food, the kitchen and baking.

Creativity It can’t just taste good, it also has to look good. Watch their imagination take flight as they decorate their freshly baked muffin or cookie.


Motor skillsPick up some practical skills such as learning to crack an egg confidently, knead dough and whisk batter.

Self-esteem Being able to dish out food on the table fosters a sense of accomplishment. These con-tributions, however small, are monumental to the develop-ment of self.

LEARN MORE THOUGH THEIR 5 SENSESBaking offers them the experiential platform to engage their sense of sight, smell, touch, taste, and hearing. Making something from scratch with their own hands, there is an immense sense of achievement when children complete a product of their own. They also derive pleasure from baking as they observe, take instructions, and plan their agenda. Be it in dressing a cupcake

or decorating a cake, baking at Genius R Us is never a chore!

GROUP LEARNINGAt Genius R Us, kids do not work individually, but work in a team of two. Such joint efforts not only allow for exchange of ideas, it also fa-cilities social skills and foster cooperation in them.

TO THE VERY LAST COOKIE CRUMB…From the moment your little chefs put on the chef hats and colourful aprons, it’s

truly a melting pot of fun for parents and kids alike. Even if the last crumb of cookie has been consumed, the sweet aroma of still lingers on. Because it’s the experience that really matters. Bake a date with your child at Genius R Us!

City Square Mall Studio180 Kitchener Road, #07-08 Singapore 208539Tel: 6634 6020 / 8183 0563 (SMS)Email: [email protected]: www.facebook.com/geniusrusWebsite: www.geniusrus.com

Genius R Us One off Trial Rate

$32 per child (Usual: $45 per child)

$52 for 1 parent & 1 child (Usual: $75 for 1 parent &

1 child)

Workshops for 2.5 - 12 years old

(A paying adult is re-quired for kids below 5

years old)

Promo code: TNAP15Terms & Conditions:

Promo is for The New Age Parents readers only.

Strictly for 1 session only for 1 child.

This promotion is not valid in conjunction with other

on-going Genius R Us promotions.

Promotion is valid till 31 Dec 15.


6 Ways To Organise Your Child’s Progress In School

BACK ON TRACKBy Dorothea Chow


nels open so that your child can confide in you about what is happening in school. Often, we are too worried about their academic prog-ress, and fail to realize the importance of other factors like friendships, respect for teachers, energy levels and self-awareness that are vital to your child’s holistic devel-opment and progress. 3. Make a schedule togetherChildren need structure to thrive, and a planned sched-ule can do just that. You don’t have to plan out every minute of the day for your child, but you should certain-ly designate certain blocks of time each day to study and play. As soon as your child’s timetable and extra-curricu-lar activities are determined, create a simple routine that he is willing to commit to, and stick it up somewhere in plain view, such as on the refrigerator door!

4. Stick to your scheduleThere’s no point having a schedule if you don’t keep it! Be diligent about ensur-ing that your child and you keep to your commitments. It might mean less TV time for him, and less me-time for you (if you need to guide him with his homework during allocated slots), but

some sacrifices have to be made.

5. Don’t compare Your friend’s kid might study 3 solid hours every school day, or finish her homework within half an hour – but she is not your kid and they are not your family. Every family, and every child, is unique. Keep in mind your child’s capacity, personality, incli-nations and need for sleep. Customize a plan that works best for your child and your family, and don’t let anyone else be your benchmark of what it looks like to be tracking well at school. Set your own standards for your family.

6. Play hardAs much as possible, keep at least one full day of the weekend free of any school-related stuff. Although as you want your child to be tracking well in school, you need to intentionally carve out time to allow him to just play and relax. Such pockets of down-time moments are essential to your child’s overall well-being and, consequentially, developing a positive, healthy attitude towards school. And when your child enjoys school, you won’t need to hover over them every day to keep him on track - he will want to do it himself!

1. Discuss priorities and expectations Your vision for your child’s school-going years could be worlds apart from what he has in mind. Bear in mind that you may have very different goals and expecta-tions about what school is going to be like. Talk about these things. Lay your ex-pectations and hopes out on the table instead of assum-ing that your child would automatically understand or know these things.

While every parent wants their children to be good students, perhaps you’ll need to define what classi-fies as a “good student” in your books, and lay down clear expectations for your child’s behavior and attitude towards his education.

2. Listen to your childYour child may not have a proper inkling of what school is going to be like, but that doesn’t mean they haven’t thought about school life. Chances are, they already have a picture of what “school” is like, based on things they have heard. Let them share their perspectives on school, and allow them the freedom to also express their fears or misgivings about what school will be like.

Once school has begun, keep communication chan-

SCHOOL


HappierHomeworking

Childwith Your

SCHOOL


#1 MODEL THE ACTION

“Set aside a fixed time and place to do home-work.” - LIYEE, MOTHER OF

THREE

You might not have “homework” to do per se, but you can still model the action of sitting at the table and busying yourself with something appropriate, such as checking your emails, writing lists or paying the bills. This way, you’ll be right there anytime your child needs some help.

#2 CREATE A SYSTEM TOGETHER

“On an average, I spend about 45 minutes to one hour, to help my child on his homework every day. It has been a rou-tine and I've been doing that since he started Primary 1. I believe in consistency, it's import-ant to keep track of his study, do daily revisions to make sure that he un-derstands what's being taught in class.” - EMILY,

MOTHER OF ONE

No child wants to spend the whole afternoon working on problem sums! For younger children, set a time slot for them to spend on homework, e.g. 1 hour before dinner. For older children, discuss with them what pocket of time will work. This allows children to know that there is a start and end time, and to have the space to plan the rest of their time accordingly. Some degree of control over that structure can empower your child to own his schedule and the tasks at hand.

#3 MAKE IT A TEAM EFFORT

Make this your family mantra: No one’s done till everyone’s done. Leave no man behind. If you have more than one school-going child to oversee, help them to own this saying for them-selves. Encourage those who are older or quicker to help the younger or slower ones. For example, if one child finishes first, he can do some quiet reading, help a younger sibling, or plan out his schedule for the week. It’s not about competing about who finishes first, or who scores the highest. It’s about coming alongside each other in the journey.

Encouraging our children to have a

healthy attitude towards homework

can be a difficult task. This can affect your child’s morale,

as well as yours. How can you make

homework time a more positive

experience for the whole family?

By Dorothea Chow


#4 DIVIDE AND CONQUER

If languages are your forte, by all means, coach your child in that area. If your husband is better at Science and Maths, let him take charge of those areas with the kids. Don’t try to do everything by yourself! Of course, if your spouse is not available, seek alternative ways to get your child’s needs met if you feel unqualified.

#5 LET YOUR CHILD DISCOVER THE ANSWER

Sometimes when your child

is stumped by a question, asking your child to explain what they understand about the problem can help them figure out how to proceed. When they come up with something helpful to the problem, encourage them for their suggestions and consider together how that helps them to move forward towards a solution.

#6 RELATIONSHIP IS MORE IMPORTANT

“We constantly remind ourselves to focus on the learning process but

not the learning out-come. For example, it is perfectly fine for a child to make mistakes in a spelling test or any other test, as long as we know that he has tried his best to learn the words. A reminder for parents not to compare your child with others, as each child has their own unique learning capabilities.” –

TZER JING, MOTHER OF TWO

Ideally, you want your child to learn to work things out for themselves. How-

SCHOOL


ever, it’s futile to withhold the answer if frustration is making them hate you or the subject. Your relationship is much more important than your child getting the right answer, and a bad attitude towards a subject never helped anyone succeed.

#7 EMPATHIZE WITH YOUR CHILD

“Cry together, and encour-age and guide your child to solve the many chal-lenges along the way.” –

JANICE, MOTHER OF THREE

Your child may feel frustrat-ed, bored or angry with the pile of homework in front of them. Or they may get stuck at a particular problem and feel defeated. Often, what your child needs most is for you to understand that this is all extremely frustrating or discouraging for them. Give them the choice of trying again on their own, or with input from you.

Over time, you might

reap the rewards of your efforts in unexpected ways!

#8 KNOW WHEN TO QUIT

If you or your child find yourselves on the verge of a hissy fit or thrashing the whole stack of assessment books and worksheets, it’s time to take a break!

Q HOW CAN PARENTS MOTIVATE THEIR CHILD TO DO THEIR HOMEWORK AND STUDY?

Parents can begin with extrinsic motiva-tion by setting a task and reward system for pre-schoolers, thus creating positive reinforcement. Once such a link has been formed, move away from tangible rewards to verbal praise and encouragement. Remember to make the homework and study time fun as well to build intrinsic motivation for your child! Pre-schoolers need to develop altruistic appreciation for their tasks, rather than perform them just to gain acknowledgement from others.

Q+A WITH MS MAGDALENE HENG, HEAD OF PRESCHOOL ENGLISH AT MIND STRETCHER EDUCATION GROUP


SCHOOL

Getting Your Kids Started On Money Management

DOES THIS MAKECENTS TO YOU?


IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT GRADES“I was a top student in my school. I’ve got a Masters De-gree. I am really hard work-ing. I got a job in prestigious company. So, how come I am not as rich as you?”

Although educational qualifications and hard work is really important, it has little to do with being able to generate sustainable wealth. Having the skills to achieve good grades and perform really well in your job does not mean you possess the skills to become a money master.

MASTERING MONEY SKILLSThe ability to be a money master is also a skill on its own; a set of positive money habits and attitudes that can be acquired. Just like cook-ing and driving are skills we learn over time. The trouble is schools don’t teach us enough on the skills to be-come financially successful.

Do you as a parent, have

the mindset, habits and skills to raise junior to be financial-ly savvy?

FIRST LESSON: SPENDING Who taught you how to spend and how did you learn it?

From as young as two years old, children learn al-most everything from mim-icking their parents, and this includes how you manage your money. For example, a trip to the supermarket to buy groceries shows your kids how you spend and handle your cash.

Here’s another fact to pon-der on. Ever wondered why in same families, the parents have always been struggling for money for many gener-ations? I believe we model after our parents’ money behaviors, beliefs, patterns and attitudes. Since our par-ents were not imparted with good money habitudes or money management skills, they did what they could

How much allowance should you give to your kids? Spend, save or invest - which of these concepts should you start teaching your child first? Master Money Coach and Certified Financial Planner Ernest Tan shares practical tips and tools that empower you to raise your child to be financially savvy.

by working very hard, and struggled to have money to bring us up.

If you want raise your kids to be money smart, you need to set yourself as a good role model by under-standing and teaching your kids the following concepts.

UNDERSTAND EARNING, SAVING, SPENDING, SHARING AND BORROWINGHere are some important questions or points to note:What does your child see or understand money as? Do they know the value of Money?How is money used? Where does money come from?Help kids understand the difference between “needs” and “wants” Show kids how they can save money by comparison shopping

USING MONEY JARSKids learn much faster when the lesson are fun and visual. As soon as kids are given an allowance, I encourage parents to give each of their kids a set of the money jars (kid version) and also show them their own money jars (adult version).

Show your kids how to por-tion part of their allowance into their money jars whenev-er they receive an allowance. Have your kids to set goals


on each of the money jars, i.e. Saving Goal, Spending Goal and a Sharing Goal.

Every time your kid adds money to the savings jar, count together with them on how much they have saved. Talk to them about how much more they need to reach their goal and the estimated time needed to achieve it.

GIVING ALLOWANCE When giving your kids an allowance, especially for young kids who are new to handling their own money, consider giving them a small amount of money, and help them portion the realistic amount of money into their different money jars.

“It costs $1 less and it tastes the same!”

As your kids grow a little older, include your kids in family financial decisions process. For example, explain to them the reason why Mummy decided to buy Brand A fruit juice instead of Brand B fruit juice.

NEVER TOO YOUNG TO LEARN ABOUT INVESTMENTSTeach your kids about compound interest as soon as the school teaches them about simple interest in their mathematics subject. Have your kid use an online compound interest calculator to see how much money they can acquire if they invest in it.

According to the interest rate, how quickly does the money grow? Research shows that by using specific numbers in your discussions, it is more effective than merely describing the concept of compounding to your kid.

DELAYED GRATIFICATION Inspire your kids to set long term spending goals for something more expensive. For example, if your child has a habit of buying a snack after school every day, he may decide he’d rather save all that money on snacks to buy a Xbox instead. The concept of delayed grati-fication is enforced when children goes through the process of thinking about what they have to give up in order to purchase a bigger ticket item.

THE HABIT OF GIVING BACKHave discussions and talk about charity with your

child. Bring them along when you make a certain donation. The more you expose your children to acts of generosity; it slowly becomes ingrained and a practice and habit that your child may adapt as they grow into adulthood.

According to developmen-tal psychologist Marilyn Price Mitchell, children who per-form acts of kindness expe-rience increased wellbeing, popularity and acceptance among peers. This, in turn, leads to better classroom be-havior and higher academic achievement.

For more information on how you can develop positive habits to help kids become future money masters, read “Raising Fiancially Savvy Kids” by Ernest Tan. Now retailing at SGD$22.90, you can grab a copy of the book at all major bookstores such as MPH, Popular, Kinokuniya and Times.

Ernest Tan is a money coach, author of the book “Rais-ing Financially Savvy Kids”, Founder and Managing Director of Ernest Resources Agency Pte Ltd and Jopez Academy; a financial educa-tion company that coaches

children and their parents on financial literacy, mon-ey and life mastery through its proprietary training courses and board game.

SCHOOL


Teaching Our Children The Value Of…Setting Goals

SCHOOL


Now that I have my own daughter, like many parents, I’m terribly afraid she’ll pick up my faults. We want our kids to be a mil-lion times better than we ever were: smarter, happi-er, more driven, focused, successful. You know what can help kids experience all that? If they’re able to set and achieve their goals.

Studies show that a student who can identify realistic goals and map out steps to reach them is more likely to score higher grades and experience lifelong well-being.

A Can-Do AttitudeTo raise a goal-getter, the first thing to do is make sure that your little one be-lieves in their own ability to achieve their goals. This is called self-efficacy.

A child with high self-ef-ficacy has strong faith in their capabilities, and is therefore more likely to try harder to accomplish tasks and deal with challenges. Keeping in line with that, a child with low self-efficacy is more likely to give up.

You could call this a form of self-fulfilling prophecy: Believe that you have what

SETTING

Teaching Our Children

The Value Of…

GOALS

“Finish what you started,” my

mother told my 12 year old self.

She was referring to the

multiple projects, New Year’s resolu-

tions, and half-filled diaries that

defined me as a great starter of

things, who conjured

grandiose plans and had big

dreams – but who inevita-

bly lost steam halfway, leaving behind a trail of

unfinished goals in my wake.

By Jenny Tai


it takes, and you’ll proba-bly get it done. If you think you’re going to fail, you likely will.

According to a study in the Annual Review of Psy-chology, kids start forming beliefs about what they can and cannot achieve before they even reach their teenage years. That’s why it’s important to foster a can-do attitude from the beginning, so that our children don’t settle on

some goals while giving up on others too early.

Applaud and acknowl-edge your child’s efforts by saying things like, “You’re really good at going after what you want,” or “I see how hard you’re working at this. You’ve come a long way.” Research shows that a child’s belief in their ability to reach a goal is essential to building a hopeful attitude and opti-mistic outlook.

How to Teach Goal-settingFollow this SMART plan to help your children set goals effectively.

Dream big, little one sounds cute and inspiring, but part of our job is giv-ing our kids a healthy dose of reality. That doesn’t mean being negative, by any means. Let’s help them by providing encouraging, honest guidance. Kids

SCHOOL


often make big, sweep-ing goals like learning a new instrument or being really good at soccer: good goals, but goals that take a lot of work – and they’re not always aware of just how much.

Ever notice your child feeling discouraged when they fall short, then sub-sequently abandon the goal they were once so enthusiastic about? It’s a hard thing for parents to witness.

Here’s what you can do.Help your kids identify

Specific, Measurable, and Attainable goals with clear Results, breaking the goals into smaller steps, and setting a specif-ic Time frame.

The SMART acronym is borrowed from a goal-set-ting program taught in several public schools in Virginia, U.S, all of which have seen positive out-comes with its students.

Start smallMy favorite teacher taught me the magic of setting small, incremental goals. In primary school, my math scores were atrocious. After I got 65% on a test, she suggested that I aim for a 75% next time. Once I obtained that, her answer was, “Great. Get 85% on your next test.” I managed

to reach the final goal of 100%, and I did it by work-ing my way up with many small “improve by 10%” goals along the way.

Jumping right to lofty goals can be overwhelm-ing, which is why small goals are great: They provide ample encourage-ment while giving your kids the practice they need to tackle bigger goals down the road.

Let them take the lead Ask your kid to write down a SMART goal that’s really coming from their heart. As much as you might want their goal to be, “Get better test scores,” remem-ber that children should come up with what they want to achieve. Why is it crucial that it comes from them, and not you? Be-cause the more passionate they are about the matter, the harder they’ll work at it. They need to genuinely care – otherwise, what’s the point?

Make a game plan Walk your kid through the following:

❶ Break the goal down into smaller steps, and write them down.

❷ Write down what skills

they must learn in order to realize their goal.

❸ Anticipate what road-blocks or struggles they might face along the way. Ask your child how they plan to overcome them. For example, they might have to sacrifice spending time with their friends or cut down on computer games in order to make room for studying or practicing. Ask, “Are you prepared for that?

❹ Settle on a strategy to track their progress. You can mark these small achievements with mini prizes like stickers, their favourite meal, or a fun celebratory outing – as an encouragement to keep up the good work!

❺ Determine and write down a target date for achieving their final goal.

As your child masters the art of setting and achieving goals, they’ll improve in all areas of life, be it academic pursuits, extracurricular activities, personal devel-opment, or team-leading. Everyone is a goal-getter in the making.

This is part of The New Age Parents Value series. For more articles on this series, go to www.thenewageparents


E D I T O RMichelle Ang

E X P E R T SJulia Gabriel Education, Chengzhu Mandarin Centre, Seriously Addictive Mathematics,

Study Room, VA Psychology Centre, Thomson Paediatric Centre (The Child Development Centre), Jopez Academy & The Travelling Dietitian

C O N T R I B U T O R SDorothea Chow, Som Yew Ya, Jenny Tai, Caroline Yeung & Devyani Borade

Art & Design

A R T D I R E C T O RMichelle Ang

Marketing & Advertising

B U S I N E S S D E V E L O P M E N T M A N A G E R S

Elaine Lau & Crystal Tan

Web Administration

W E B D E V E L O P M E N T D I R E C T O R

Seow Poh Heng

Orangised by

While every care is taken in the production of this parenting booklet, the publisher, editor and editorial team assume no responsibility for any inaccuracies and omission, which might arise. Opinions by the contributors and advertisers are not

necessarily those of the publisher and the editor. The articles in the parenting booklet are for references only.

Holistic Pregnancy for Mums

New Age Pregnancy

www.thenewageparents.com www.newagepregnancy.com

Feature Interview with Matthias Koh

Nam

e of

Mod

el: T

he L

iew

Fam

ily

Pho

togr

aphe

r: Ph

otog

rap

hy b

y Ye

w K

wan

g

aug/sep2013

A dAte with your doc:

Important check-ups during pregnancy

What type of plans to take

up for a young family?

Teaching children

the concept of money

Forging cultural and national identity in our children

Majulah Singapura

Dec/JAN2013/2014

Name of Model: Nigel Ching Photographer: Photography by Yew Kwang

AuspiciousChinese

names for

2014Horse BABies

Christmas

Card

Is It Too Early To Start

Planning?

RetirementPlanS

To Do WiTh Your KiDs

ideas

Generation

C r e a t i n g a J o i n t P a r e n t i n g P l a n

Are We Raising A Generation Of Narcissists?

ME

Name of Models: Jae & SeshaPhotographer: Photography by Yew Kwang

feb/mar2014

Valentine’s DaySpecial

My Valentine, My Mrs.

Germ AttAckCommon Germs & Bacteria Parents Should Know

Building Sibling Bonds6 Sibling Bonding Activities

Our tO LeArn And PLAy4 Fun Weekend Activities To Do

How To Answer Your Child’s Difficult Questions Tips for Parents

Traveling tips for parents

Father Figure

Feature Interview with Matthias Koh

Father’s

Day Special

Juggling Fatherhood and

Husbandhood

Combating Childhood

illnessWhat are the best ways to

beat them?

Nam

e of

Mod

el: J

ulka

Pho

enix

Pho

togr

aphe

r: Ph

otog

rap

hy b

y Ye

w K

wan

g

jun/jul2013

Flying with your tot

Mindful parenting Parenting with mindfulness

oct/nov2013

Children Around The World

Children's dAy speCiAl

Special Small

SpaceS: Mummies share their tot's room

Top 10 Are You A Type A

pArenT? Brain Boosters For Kids

Does Your ChilD Get lost in DreamlanD All the time?

Name of Model: Nur Nyla Qamelia Photographer: Photography by Yew Kwang

Nam

e of

Mod

el: E

than

Ale

xand

er M

clea

nP

hoto

grap

her:

Phot

ogra

phy

by

Yew

Kw

ang

APR/mAy

2013

A Day In Mummy’s Shoes…

Does My Child Really Need To Take Antibiotics?

The Road to Independence:

Mother’s Day special

Power UP!

Immunity Foods For Children

ToP 10

In sync wIth your In-law: Getting along with your other Mother

Teaching your Child to Become

Independent in Everyday Tasks

arentsThe New Age P Parenting in the New Era

The New Age Parents is a free online resource site and e-magazine for parents

of preschoolers and parents-to-be. Subscribe for free to be part of our online

community today.

W e b s i t e : w w w . t h e n e w a g e p a r e n t s . c o mE - m a g a z i n e : w w w . t h e n e w a g e p a r e n t s . c o m / m a g a z i n e

F a c e b o o k : w w w . f a c e b o o k . c o m / n e w a g e p a r e n t sF o r u m : w w w . t h e n e w a g e p a r e n t s . c o m / f o r u m

we don't just prepare them for school,we prepare them for life

discover how we prepare your child for life

Preparation for life in the 21st century requires children to have myriad of learning dispositions. In The Little Skool-House, we provide opportunities for

children to become Creative Innovators, Risk Takers, Independent Thinkers, Effective Communicators and Inquirers.

We have 16 centres island-wide!Call now to make an appointment to visit us

North: Ang Mo Kio . Khoo Teck Puat Hospital . MSF Building . Orchid Country Club . Sembawang PlaceCentral: OCBC Centre . Pearl Bank (Near Outdram MRT) . River Valley Road . Singapore General Hospital

West: Alexandra Hospital . Ayer Rajah CC . Namly Cresent . National University of Singapore . Ulu Pandan CC East: Mountbatten Square . Tampines Junction

6509 7880 www.littleskoolhouse.com [email protected]

The Little Skool-House Early Literacy Seminar Series:Promoting The Love Of Literature In Young Children

Meet experts in the early childhood field who will share tips on using fun and creative strategies to develop your child’s early language skills and literacy.

Date: 16 May 2015, SaturdayTime: 9.30am to 1pmLocation: Suntec Convention & Exhibition Centre Level 3 (Room 300)

Fee: $28 per person (inclusive of GST)

To learn more about the seminar, Visit us at bit.ly/LSHseminar2015

Register now as seats are

limited!

parenting with love 2015

Documents