October 2020

Church Roles & Responsibilities ~ COMMUNICATION

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In the Parish of Dalton-in-Furness, Newton, and Ireleth with Askam.

St. Peter

St. Mary

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Communication One would think that there is no communication in the church other than us speaking to each other when we meet, but in this day and age there is so much more that goes on behind the scenes. Our first communication of getting the word out to the community is through the weekly noticesheet and posters on all our noticeboards. For those of you who come to church, please do look at the noticeboard from time to time you would be surprised what is there for you. I remember someone once saying to me that they didn't know an event was happening. It was on the sheet, on the noticeboards and in the magazine—what more could have been done to inform? The magazine Is not only for local church folk either. It is for the community and their relatives and friends. Ex community also receive a magazine if they have requested it be sent. The magazine is designed to inform, educate and entertain. It has been good that we can send it out electronically during Covid19 but it is not good that half of our subscribers don’t have an email address and have not had a magazine since the April issue. Technology (love it or hate it, its here to stay)—Facebook, Twitter, the Website and emails. Unfortunately this is the way ahead for communication—proved by the sale of face masks made by Jennifer over the past months after a post on Facebook reached beyond even our community. Those not on-line have missed being able to watch live Church of England services on a Sunday (or to catching up later). News on Facebook or Twitter is up to date at the touch of a button. The Parish Website is full of information of what is going on (even the magazine is there).

Barbara Irwin

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FROM THE VICARAGE

I often wonder what words people want to, or need to hear. At this time many of us will continue to have mixed emotions. There has been a special session of the Church of England General Synod in September, to vote to enable such meetings in the future to happen online. I didn’t attend as the numbers were limited, so only one clergy person went from this diocese. At the beginning of the meeting there is always an address by one of the Archbishops. It seems with the new Archbishop of York and the Archbishop of Canterbury there is partnership with both the Archbishops sharing the address. Bishop Stephen spoke very strongly by saying ‘I hate coronavirus’…. he went on to repeat that several times saying ‘I hate it because….

* so many have died, so many people have died alone, * our health service has been stretched to the limit. * so many are bereaved, weddings and baptisms and ordinations have

been postponed or have gone ahead without people that have meant to be with them.

* children’s schooling has been disrupted. * so many people have been ill, crying out in pain, so many isolated,

lonely, fearful, depressed. * behind locked doors terrible things have happened. * the poor and the disadvantaged have been hit the hardest. * it has left so many people across the world feeling hopeless as if life

itself has been taken from us’’ He spoke about what we have learnt too, about needing each other, about the importance of being thankful. Archbishop Stephen spoke with a powerful voice and ended with reminding us that ‘nothing can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord’. For people in the story of the Bible there was a voice who cried out in their distress. We read about this voice in passages from Isaiah, and I think it speaks to us today too. Let me give you some context. It is 587BC, Jerusalem is destroyed, God’s people have been taken captive and travelled as captives on foot to modern day Iraq. They were there for 70 years and learnt to ‘sing Lord’s song in a strange land.’ It was during this terrible time that ‘the voice’ came and we read about this voice in Isaiah 40-55. From listening to this ’voice’ ‘crying in the wilderness’ the people began to change the world. I wonder what God might be saying to us in this time to give us strength and hope in midst of uncertainty.

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On 18th October, the Annual Church Meetings will take place. Traditionally at these meetings we elect our Church Wardens, look back on the year past (2019) and elect members to the Parochial Church Council, and also this year we elect members to Deanery Synod too. Please do come to St. Mary’s for 10am and we will conduct some of the business during the service and some straight afterwards. There will be agendas available and a copy of the Annual Report for 2019, in our church buildings and on the website.

Some of the words of the ‘voice’ are ‘Comfort, O comfort my people says your God speak tenderly to her’ and ‘those who wait for the Lord will renew their strength’. Maybe these and other words from our Bible could help us and help us to be a ‘voice’ in our communities today. What is the ‘voice’ that our communities need to hear? Certainly, words of comfort and definitely words of hope. Words that enable us to have strength through it all. The good news of Jesus Christ gives us hope, it doesn’t mean we will be saved from any distress or pain or bad things happening, but it does mean that we are not alone, that we will get through, that God is still God and with us. We often light candles offering prayer, I invite you as you read this to either light a candle or think of a candle flame, flickering, often looking so small and fragile, blowing with the slightest breeze, yet providing light, light that can fill a dark space. That is why Jesus as the light for the world is such a good image. In what might seem a never-ending darkness we have the light of Christ, who is another voice saying ‘I am the light for the world’ and ‘I will never leave you’.

Ruth

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Bible Sunday 25th October

The 18th October is St Luke’s Day – this is a sonnet by Malcolm Guite for St Luke. His gospel is itself a living creature A ground and glory round the throne of God, Where earth and heaven breathe through human nature And One upon the throne sees it is good. Luke is the living pillar of our heal-ing, A lowly ox, the servant of the four, We turn his page to find his face revealing The wonder, and the welcome of the poor. He breathes good news to all who bear a burden Good news to all who turn and try again, The meek rejoice and prodigals find pardon, A lost thief reaches paradise through pain, The voiceless find their voice in eve-ry word And, with Our Lady, magnify Our Lord.

ALL SOULS SUNDAY 1st NOVEMBER 2020

This year will be different from the past years as we will not be able to meet together to remember those who have died this year. Nothing has been decided to date but everyone will be informed either by the weekly newsletter or the November magazine.

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The deadline for the NOVEMBER issue of NEW LIFE is

FRIDAY OCTOBER 16TH

THEME ‘Church Roles & Responsibilities ~ Centre Users’

Prayer for the sick I was listening to my new curate pray and I realized one of his phrases didn't come out quite right. He said, "...and Lord, we pray for those who are sick of this church."

Telling the time The cable repairman was on my street and asked me what time it was. I told him it was between 1:00 pm and 5:00 pm.

Church website - www.daltonparish.co.uk

Facebook -

St. Mary’s Church, Dalton-in-Furness @daltonstmary

Twitter -

twitter.com/St Mary’s Dalton @daltonstmary

What’s on in Dalton Parish @What’sDalton

Why, What, Where, How? Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

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PARISH RECORDS St. Mary’s Church August 30th Poppy HILTON Sept 13th Maya CORRAN St. Peter’s Church August 29th Elierah-Grace HIGH Sept 6th Aria CHAPMAN St. Peter’s Church August 28th Emma Twiname and Michael Stanley GRAHAM Sept 12th Natalie Rose Ingram and Alexander James BRIERLEY

St. Mary’s Church burial of ashes September 11th Joseph GELDART (80) Barrow Crematorium September 11th Sylvia May BELL (93)

Funerals

Weddings

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Why, What, Where, How? Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?

Is your face mask making your skin break out? Face masks are giving us skin complaints. In fact, so many of us are now suffering that the complaint has been given its own name: ‘maskne’. The causes are obvious. Our breath is warm and moist, and every time we exhale into our masks this humid air gets trapped. Masks move, and so we have friction. Added to that is the unpleasant fact that our salvia is actually teeming with bacteria (with more bugs per square inch than even a loo seat!). Acne mechanica is the medical term for ‘maskne’. With all that bacteria being trapped and rubbed against our nose and chin, no wonder ‘mask breakouts’ are rising dramatically. Stress is another cause for skin complaints, and the pandemic has given many of us huge stress this year. We may face crippling anxiety over job security, finances, the health of loved ones, social isolation, or even being trapped in an abusive household. No wonder our faces are breaking out in a rash!

One in five of us suffer depression The pandemic has doubled our rates of depression. Now one in five adults are struggling with the symptoms. And yet the peak of the Covid-19 mental health crisis is ‘yet to come’, according to NHS bosses. In June the Office for National Statistics released data showing that 19.2 percent of adults were experiencing some form of depression. This figure had almost doubled, from around one in 10 (9.7 per cent), before the pandemic. But NHS bosses warn that up to half a million more patients are expected to enter the system in coming months. Those most vulnerable to depression are women aged 16 to 29 who are unable to afford an unexpected expense, or who are disabled. A spokeswoman for Mind, the mental health charity, says, “It’s crucial that mental health is put at the centre of the government’s ongoing recovery plans.” A report from the NHS Confederation echoes this, saying that mental health bodies will need “intensive support and investment.”

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Why, What, Where, How? How do you handcuff a one-armed man?

Moral questions from the pandemic You may have missed it at the time. The movie ‘Contagion’ didn’t make much of an impact when it was released for public viewing in 2011. Perhaps it was thought to be unrealistic. It was about a highly contagious, unknown virus, transmitted by an infected bat to a pig in a Chinese marketplace. From there it spread like wildfire round the world. It was fiction then of course, but not so far-fetched as to be distant from reality, as we now know. Deadly viruses, and the plagues they cause, have been part of world history since time began. In the early days, when travel between continents was infrequent, their spread was slower and usually confined to local regions. The way the film’s imaginary plot develops bears an uncanny resemblance to what we have experienced this year. Panic buying empties supermarkets, whole populations adopt social distancing, scientists work flat out to identify the virus and then search for a means to combat it. Meanwhile, millions are infected, and quarantines are imposed. The story progresses far beyond the reality which is familiar to us. The irresponsible use of social media and false rumours of a cure lead to

the looting of pharmacies. Emergen-cy food supplies are ransacked, law and order break down. Troops police the streets. Then there’s a breakthrough: a vaccine is discovered. But that raises a new moral problem: who will get it first and what would be a fair distribution system? The movie is still available via Netflix, or you can buy a DVD online. Despite the inevitable carnage of the pandemic and the suffering it portrays, it contrives to have a relatively happy ending. In real life, we haven’t got that far yet. But, please God, we will. After all, most deadly diseases are now under control and both vaccination and immunisation are part and parcel of everyday life; old ‘uns take it for granted that their GP will summon them for an anti-flu jab each winter. But we may face an ethical dilemma when it comes to a vaccine for Covid-19. If there’s an initial shortage, who should get it first? Should money come into it? Are Christian principles applicable?

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Is the internet taking over your life?

Ofcom, the media watchdog, has issued some sombre warnings based on a recent survey of national internet habits: - More than half (59%) of all 50 mil-lion internet users in the UK say they are addicted to surfing the web. (That includes 45 per cent of the over-65 age group who are using the internet.) - We now spend an average of more than 24 hours each week online. - Huge numbers of us have neglect-ed housework, been late for work, and even walked into people on the street, because we simply could not put down our digital devices. - The internet is damaging our social and working lives. Around a third of us have avoided friends and family in order to stay online, while a quar-ter of teenagers are late for school because they are online. - A third of us have attempted a ‘digital detox’. One in six of us has even chosen a holiday destination with no online access. - Meanwhile, perhaps most awe-some - a quarter of adults admit to sending a text or instant messages to someone in the same room as themselves while at home. Why not just say something?

Why, What, Where, How? Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained to the

counter?

From The Churchwardens

A very big THANK YOU

to Jennifer Tomlinson for continuing to

manufacture face masks with the proceeds going

to the Church Centre Refurbishment Fund.

This is the only money being paid into the bank account for Fundraising for both churches. If anyone has an idea to raise money please let us know—or just get on an do it!. We are still having to pay £400 every month for St. Peter’s (with nothing coming in!)

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Social media manners

There is ‘good practise’ and ‘bad practise’ in just about everything we do, not least our social media habits. No wonder that when Vogue magazine recently published a ‘modern girl’s guide to social media etiquette’ (which encouraged constant self-promotion), a daily national newspaper* responded with ten of its own ‘commandments’ for good behaviour. We paraphrase them here: 1. Don’t be a food bore. By all means post a photo of your impressive home-made birthday cake, but not a running commentary of what you are having for breakfast, lunch and dinner… 2. Don’t get into political arguments. No matter what you say, someone is going to disagree, and it could turn ugly. So minimise the potential damage: keep your politics to live conversations. 3. Don’t do the humblebragging stuff. Especially, don’t boast about all the running/cycling you do with comments like ‘sad to see that I only clocked up 15 miles today… must do better…!’ 4. Use those hashtags and emojis sparingly – after all, by now you can spell lots of words; you are not 10.

Why, What, Where, How? Why do grocery stores buy so many checkout line registers if they only keep

3 or 4 open?

. 5. Beware of cut-and-paste – some people have even managed to tweet their passwords that way. 6. If you are in a row with a family member, don’t start tweeting about it. It never improves the situation. 7. Looking for a restaurant or other information? Don’t use social media as a search engine: ‘Can anyone recommend… ?’ Ask Google, instead. 8. Don’t make cryptic whinges. You know, like the ‘some people aren’t worthy of a place in your heart’ variety. Don’t moan, rant or rave on social media: save it for the privacy of your own home. 9. Double-check the recipient list. The consequences of not doing so could be very embarrassing… 10. Know when to put your phone down. Remember it is okay to talk to people who are standing right in front of you, to eat with two hands, and to walk down the street looking around you. (*Daily Telegraph, 31.03.17)

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Hello Everyone I am sure you will all realize that because of the rise in the Coronavirus, it makes it difficult for M.U. as a group to make plans. However, trying to be optimistic, we will assess the situation towards the end of the year, with the possibility of meeting maybe early next year, but obviously this will depend on many things. I will be sure to let you all know. In the meantime please be assured you are all in my thoughts and prayers. Keep Well. Keep Safe. Love

Doris Hall, Branch Leader

Mothers' Union and the UK prison system Crime hurts many people – including the families of prisoners who have ended up in the UK prison system. They are often the forgotten victims, but not by the Mothers’ Union (MU). Instead, the MU’s prison work across Britain is extensive, with the aim of keeping hurting families together. It is not simple work, for as prison governors are replaced and new directives come into force, those who work with prisoners and their families must adapt their approach. MU members provide support to prison visitors by holding short courses so that visitors can get the most out of their time with the prison residents. MU also holds workshops to introduce many of the services that work with prisoners’ families. MU helps support the Family Days held at one prison, and also provides presents for children of prisoners at Christmas time. MU provides tea and a chat with the inmates of one women’s prison, as well going-home packs of essential items for when they leave. MU also supports prison officers, who as key workers have found the last few months particularly challenging. MU’s Thank You Key Workers appeal wants to raise funds to provide families of key workers with short breaks or experience days. If you would like to help, please go to: https://www.mothersunion.org/thank-you-keyworker-appeal

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Why, What, Where, How? What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Helping Christians in Beirut after the explosion The charity Barnabas Fund has thanked its supporters for their gen-erous response to an emergency appeal that followed the disastrous explosion at the port in Lebanon on 4th August. It meant that Barnabas Fund was able to send more than £85,000 to help Christians in Beirut with food and the repair of their homes. As a spokesman for Barna-bas Fund explains: “All those being assisted were already very poor and vulnerable, even before the explo-sion. Some of those we are helping are Muslim-background believers from nearby countries, who cannot receive other aid because coming forward would reveal the fact that they were converts from Islam, thus endangering themselves.” Four of the five neighbourhoods worst affected are predominantly Christian. Help is still very much needed. If you would like to give, a monthly food parcel costs £27, or to help repair a home costs £380. Visit https://barnabasfund.org

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Why young women should not

let social media get them down

Young women would be well advised to take what they see on social media with a big pinch of salt. The endless images of other women, impossibly beautiful, living lives of bliss with good-looking men and perfect children is simply not true. As a spokeswoman for the Mental Health Foundation puts it: ‘On social media they are seeing these edited versions of lives, bikinis, beaches, not seeing the reality.” In short, the ‘selfie culture’ has arrived, and it is NOT kind. Recent statistics from NHS Digital show that a staggering 26 per cent of women aged between 16 and 24 report symptoms of common mental health conditions. Girls feel under constant pressure over their body image, and also fall victim to bullying. The result? High rates of anxiety and depression. As a spokeswoman from the National Centre for Social Research says: ‘This is the first cohort to come of age in social media ubiquity. This is the context they are coming into, and it warrants further investigation.’

Why, What, Where, How? What happens if someone loses a lost and found box?

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PUBLIC INFORMATION 2.5 Can I share a private vehicle with someone from another household? You should try not to share a vehicle with those outside your household or social bubble. If you need to, try to:

• share the transport with the same people each time

• keep to small groups of people of up to the legal limit of 6 people at any one time

• open windows for ventilation

• travel side by side or behind other people, rather than facing them, where seating arrangements allow

• face away from each other

• consider seating arrangements to maximise distance between people in the vehicle

• clean your car between journeys using standard cleaning products - make sure you clean door handles and other areas that people may touch

• make sure the driver and passengers wear a face covering The Department for Transport has provided specific guidance on using private vehicles. Please see their guidance on private cars and other vehicles for more information on car sharing and traveling with people outside your household group.

Turkey turns another church into a mosque Just a month after converting the famous Hagia Sophia into a functioning mosque, Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdoğan announced that another historic church has been turned into a place of Islamic worship. The historic Chora church, one of Istanbul's most recognisable Byzantine buildings, was officially commissioned as a mosque in late August. The mediaeval church contains several 14th century Byzantine mosaics and frescoes portraying scenes from biblical stories - but, much like the Hagia Sophia, the artwork was covered up during the Muslim Ottoman takeover in 1453, before being unearthed again when the building was converted to a museum 70 years ago. In a recent order signed by Erdogan and published in Turkey’s Official Gazette, the government announced that the Church of the Holy Saviour in Chora was now officially converted to the Kariye Mosque. It is not clear when Islamic prayers will commence at the building. Many Christians reacted with words of lament and frustration at the latest action.

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WEBSITE Vicar Our Website is a front page of what we as a parish have to offer. It has a calendar of events, not many at the moment! Information about weddings, funeral and christenings. Picture galleries of special events such as the Christmas Tree Festival and fundraising things we’ve done, work with children etc. It also has information about groups associated with the parish such as Bell Ringers and Mother Union. Our schools have information pages too with links to their own websites. During this time I have been posting the Worship at Home information sheets for people to access if they would like to and also we have started to link a copy of the New Life magazine, again so people can easily access it. The website shows what is going on even when it seems there isn’t much happening. Our web pages are managed by a local professional person for a small fee which keeps the site tidy and she is there to answer any queries we have about putting content onto the site. Another facility on the site is a donate button, where people can choose to safely donate online to the work of the church or the various campaigns we have—at the moment these are the Centre improvements and St Peter’s Steeple Fund. One of the other online communication channels we have access to is ‘A Church Near You (ACNY) this is a national Church of England website that has every church in England on there, with the option for each parish to add more content as they wish. So if you are planning a visit somewhere in the future you can easily find ACNY.

SOCIAL MEDIA Jennifer, Ruth, Barbara The churches have social media sites on Facebook and Twitter. Facebook is the main site with Jennifer and Ruth being the main instigators of any special services or fundraisers at both churches. The site has 803 followers & articles are well received with positive comments. The power of Facebook has recently been proved by a request for a cherry picker to clean the guttering over the church porch, no sooner was it posted than Brett McDermott did the job. It is also lovely to see the photos posted of weddings & Christenings. It is also used as a contact for people to get in touch with us via Messenger. Barbara looks after the Twitter site and once something is posted on Facebook the pictures are copied and then posted on Twitter to advertise. At other times if something is going on in church Barbara takes a photo and posts it straight away. Then the process is reversed with Jennifer or Ruth copying and posting it on Facebook.

COMMUNICATION

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MAGAZINE Barbara , editor Edith, finance Folding team: Jean, Mary & Tony, Helen & Jack, Carole 21 delivery team. The Church Magazine—New Life—runs from July to June. The Advertising helps greatly towards keeping the cost of the magazine to 50p a copy. Edith starts in April making sure that advertising space is full before printing starts for the July/August issue. She is also very good at keeping an eye on the accounts. The Vicar and Barbara discuss what the topic will be for the calendar year round about October time. Barbara then starts setting up the covers, deadlines, layouts and one-liners for the whole year of magazines. In December, the distributors get their list of dates for when the magazines will be in church ready to be picked up. In February the subscription is renewed with ‘Parish Pump’ to be able to receive artwork for the covers, clip art, cartoons, children’s mouse make page, St. James the Least, book reviews and lots of copy regarding up-to-date news around the world. The magazine wouldn’t be what it is without this wonderful website to help Editors. So at the beginning of every month Barbara logs onto Parish Pump and

COMMUNICATION downloads all she needs for coming month’s magazine and even saves items she cannot fit into the magazine for another time. She then checks with the vicar that she has not left anything out of the diary and waits for the vicar’s copy before ‘putting the magazine to bed’ (checking every page is okay and has a balanced content). She hopes each magazine has something in it for every taste. Barbara then prints off a copy and hands it to her husband to proof read. Once the corrections are made a copy is printed off and put together to go to the printer. We get ours done by Judith of St. Aidan’s church, Barrow. A week after the deadline it is printed and Barbara goes to Barrow to pick it up and take it home. On the Sunday it is delivered to church and the following Thursday it is lovingly put together by the folding team. They have got it off to a fine art by putting up a long table, putting the magazine pages in piles on the table then walking along the table picking up a page at a time (checking both sides are printed) and putting the magazine together, straightening it then folding. The magazines are put into piles and then put into bags for each deliverer. These are then put at the back of church ready for collection. Spare magazines are put into the two baskets (one at each door). The magazines are then picked up and delivered in all weathers to those who pay yearly.

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Not too much, not too young All of us want our children to grow up computer-savvy, but should toddlers of 12 to 18 months be spending up to five hours a day on touchscreen devices? Should babies less than a year old be spending as much as two and a half hours a day on such gadgets? Recent research at Birkbeck University of London and King’s College London has found that babies and toddlers who spend hours each day on devices tend to sleep less well at night, and less overall. Yet sleep is critical for the development of the brain at such a young age. The reasons for the reduced sleep were thought to be due to the impact of blue light, and the stimulation caused by the content of the games. It could also be because the infant is not getting enough physical exercise to wear itself out.

Children too trusting of online world

The number of children who believe everything they find on Google and social media sites has doubled, ac-cording to a recent Ofcom study. Eight-to-15 year olds may be ‘digital natives’ (children who have grown up with the internet) but they often lack the ‘online nous’ needed when deciding if what they see is true or impartial, Ofcom says. Hence, al-most a fifth of 12 to 15 year olds believe that all information returned by a search engine such as Google or Bing must be true, and only a third of them were able to identify paid-for adverts. The study also found that children turn to YouTube for ‘true and accu-rate’ information about what is going on in the world. Less than half of the children were aware that advertising is the main source of income for the site, and that therefore video blog-gers are often paid to favourably mention products or services.

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The reason why you have a peculiar walk Do you have a silly walk? Almost certainly yes, if you walk and use your smartphone at the same time. It seems that when we text, phone, or scroll through our contacts, we adopt a cautious and exaggerated stepping strategy, in order to try and avoid tripping over hazards which we no longer see. Researchers from Anglia Rushkin University have found that this involves us lifting our lead foot up to 18 per cent higher and 40 per cent slower over any obstacle, which does look very silly indeed. But it is probably sensible, as when we text-walk we reduce our look-out for obstacles by up to 61 per cent. Text-walkers have become such a problem on the Continent that in cities such as Antwerp, Belgium, special ‘text-walking-lanes’ have been brought in, so that text-walkers do not irritate or endanger other pedestrians. A number of European countries have also started to put fixed warnings on the ground, to alert text-walking pedestrians that there is a road or tram track right in front of them….

Why, What, Where, How? How do they get those boats in those glass bottles?

Tearfund working to help Lebanon after blast The charity Tearfund has moved fast to help people hit by the huge explosion in Lebanon on 4th August. The country was already suffering beneath the weight of an economic crisis, growing food insecurity, and widespread poverty. Tearfund’s local partners have been distributing thousands of hot meals, as well as vouchers to enable those most in need to buy food and hygiene items. Its partner churches and faith organisations are also giving emotional support to families, and also providing shelter for those who have lost their homes. Tearfund has been working in Lebanon since 2013, responding to the crisis caused by the conflict in Syria. Around 1.5 million refugees call Lebanon their home – 25 per cent of the whole population – many of these living in makeshift accommodation in Beirut’s slums. If you can help, please go to: https://www.tearfund.org

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Report: The toll of lockdown on low-income families Coronavirus has left low-income families struggling with a significant deterioration in living standards and high stress levels. So warns a new report from Child Poverty Ac-tion Group and the Church of Eng-land. The report, Poverty in the pandem-ic: The impact of coronavirus on low-income families and children, is based on a survey of families with children who are eligible for free school meals. It found around eight in 10 re-spondents reported being in a worse financial position than be-fore the pandemic, and half were much worse off because their in-come had fallen while costs have risen. Nearly nine in 10 respondents re-ported spending substantially more than before on food, electricity, and other essentials – usually be-cause they have been at home much more. Many families also said that the cost of food had gone up significantly during the early part of lockdown. The Bishop of Durham, Paul But-ler, who speaks for the Church of England on matters relating to chil-dren and families, said: "In these unprecedented times, we all need to ask ourselves urgently how we

Why, What, Where, How? Can blind people be dyslexic when they read Braille?

can help our neighbour. It is also imperative that the Government does all that it can to protect fami-lies and children.” Alison Garnham, Chief Executive of Child Poverty Action Group, said: "Low-income parents have been living under a cloud of anxie-ty in lockdown - trying to find mon-ey for family basics as their costs have been rising. That’s taken a very heavy toll.”

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Now even more plastic There is growing concern in the Government, among campaigners, and among scientists over how coronavirus has sparked an increase in single-use plastics. Not only are millions of disposable masks and gloves now ‘out there’, but there has been also a huge increase in disposable cutlery, sachets and containers. One study by UCL estimates that in the UK alone, if every person used a single-use face mask every day for a year, it would create an additional 66,000 tonnes of contaminated waste, and 57,000 tonnes of plastic packaging. Two environment ministers, Lord Goldsmith and Rebecca Pow, have said: “We are actively thinking across the Government and NHS whether we can safely reuse PPE and we are aware of other countries who have begun looking at the potential to decontaminate and reuse it.” Scientists warn that it could take up to 500 years for polypropylene face masks to degrade. Meanwhile, according to some estimates, 129billion masks and 65billion plastic gloves are being used each month worldwide.

Bring back hedgerows We need our hedgerows back – urgently. They are part of ‘nature’s toolbox’ to help us reduce our carbon emissions. That was the recent message from the CPRE countryside charity which points out that there were twice as many hedges in England before the Second World War. Since then thousands of kilometres of hedges have been ripped up to make way for new housing and motorways, and to merge and enlarge fields. The 2007 UK Countryside Survey found that there were 600,000 kilometres of managed and unmanaged hedgerows in the UK, with the vast majority of them in England. This was a significant decline on the same survey from 1984, when there were about 680,000 kilometres of hedges across Great Britain. That is a reduction of 80,000 kilometres, or 50,000 miles. To put that another way, we have ripped out about 57,000 times the entire length of Britain (874 miles). No wonder, then, that the CPRE’s report, Greener, better, faster: countryside solutions to the climate emergency and for a green recovery, calls for millions of pounds to be spent on new hedges. It says: “By planting more trees and hedgerow, restoring peatlands and moving toward a more sustainable way of farming, we can use nature’s toolbox to capture greenhouse gases from the air, while revitalising our natural environment.”

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On how to edit a church magazine

The Rectory, St James the Least My dear Nephew Darren So, your vicar has appointed you to be the magazine editor; I wonder what you have done to offend him. I appointed our magazine editor 20 years ago, after her dog dug up my rose bed. Sadly, she seems unaware that I gave it to her as a penance and has been happily carrying on ever since. She has even developed a nasty persistence when it comes to chasing me for a vicar’s letter every month. Becoming editor has brought out the tyrant in her. I applaud your hope that your magazine will be a great force for good in the community, but I fear you may be disappointed. You will hardly believe this, but many readers of our magazine seem to ignore my pastoral letter altogether, and instead scan the adverts for plumbers and undertakers – and even for both - if there has been a major burst in their pipes. In any case, here are some editorial tips to bear in mind: if you want to keep any piece of church information confidential, then publish it in your magazine. On the other hand, if you accidentally transpose the names of the ladies responsible for the altar pedestal and lectern on the flower rota, it will be spotted within seconds of publication. And you will not be easily forgiven. Staffing rotas can be helpful, so that people know who to blame when anything goes wrong. Reports of meetings of monthly groups are also welcome, because not everyone who goes to these meetings can stay awake the whole time, and thus a report informs them about the bits they slept through. Always include a list of contact details for all the church officers, but don’t worry if you mix up their various phone numbers. In fact, it can help get people talking to each other, because in order to reach the PCC Secretary, they will have had to phone most of the other PCC members first. My final piece of advice is to omit any deadline for submission for the following month. A deadline is like a red rag to a bull, and simply incites people to break it. Whereas if you have them a bit worried that they may be left out, they will get you the copy in good time. I wish you many happy hours reading badly written copy, fending off fearful poems, and stalking your own vicar, in vain hopes of getting his clergy letter. Your loving uncle, Eustace

St James the Least

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Middle class Young son to father: “Dad, what is the middle class?” Dad: “The middle class consists of people who are not poor enough to accept charity and not rich enough to donate anything.” Borrowed Teacher: We borrowed our numer-als from the Arabs, our calendar from the Romans, and our banking from the Italians. Can anyone think of other examples? Student: Well, we borrowed our lawnmower from the Smiths, our ladder from the Browns, and our hose from the Jones.... School Mother to young daughter after first day at school: “Well, dear, what did they teach you today?” Daughter: “Not much. I’ve got to go back again tomorrow.” Essays A second year student explaining to a first year student how to write es-says: “When you take stuff from one writer, it’s plagiarism, but when you take it from many writers, it’s called research.” Shakespeare Student essay: Shakespeare mar-ried Anne Hathaway, but he mostly lived at Windsor with his merry wives. This is quite usual with ac-tors.

Why, What, Where, How? Can blind people see their dreams?

Home I just saw a local burglar kicking his own front door in. I asked him what he was doing. He replied, "Working from home." Off to uni... Smith: So your son is in college? How is he making it? Jones: He isn’t. I’m making it and he is spending it. Writing home A boy was sent by his parents to a school a long distance from home. He had been strictly enjoined to write home regularly and tell them all about himself and his new life. At the end of the first week, his first text arrived: “There are 370 boys here. I wish there were 369.” Fact of life It takes 84 days for the average schoolboy to outgrow a pair of shoes. Smart money “Dad,” said the son, “what is a finan-cial genius?” “A financial genius,” said his harassed father, “is a man who can earn money faster than his family can spend it.” Where? The police officer asked me where I had been between 5 and 6. He seemed irritated when I answered "kindergarten."

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MEETING THE CHALLENGE

Why, What, Where, How? Where in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty is an egg?

JULY JULY

Stewardship 1903.50 Heat/Light/Water 212.09

Open 0.00 Maintenance 0.00

Special Services 0.00 AltarReq/Vestments 0.00

Baptism collections 0.00 Organists 0.00

Wedding collections 0.00 Insurance 694.81

Funeral collections 0.00 Parish Share 3516.83

Interest 0.26 Grounds 90.00

Admin Support 0.00 Travel 16.51

Use of centre 0.00 Phone/Postage 56.52

Coffee/tea 0.00 Office Requirements 483.00

Unity lottery 170.50 Fees & Subs 0.00

Fundraising 700.00 Mission 0.00

Garden Fund 0.00 Misc. 0.00

Investment 0.00 St Peter's Loan 400.00

Misc 0.00 Youth 0.00

Wedding fees 1070.00 Retired clergy fees 0.00

Funeral fees 2721.00 Verger Fees 0.00

Bells fees 0.00

Assigned Fees 844.99

INCOME 6565.26 EXPENDITURE 6314.75

Noah and the Ark – 2020 version In the year 2020, Noah was living in England when the Lord came unto him and said, "Once again, the earth has become too wicked to contin-ue. Build another Ark and save two of every living thing. You have six months before I will start the unend-ing rain for 40 days and 40 nights." Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his

garden, but no Ark. "Noah", He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?" "Forgive me Lord", begged Noah "but things have been difficult. I needed Building Regulations ap-proval because the Ark was over 30 square metres. I've been arguing with the Fire Brigade about the need for a sprinkler system. My neigh-bours claim that I should have ob-tained planning permission for build-

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A vampire story for Halloween Two nuns, Sister Mary Agnes and Sister Mary Vincent, were travelling through Europe in their car, sight-seeing in Transylvania. As they are stopped at a traffic light, out of no-where, a small vampire jumped onto the bonnet of their car and hissed at them through the windshield. "Quick, quick!" shouted Sister Mary Agnes, "What should we do?" "Turn the windscreen wipers on. That will get rid of the abomina-tion," said Sister Mary Vincent. Sister Mary Agnes switched on the wipers, which knocked the mini-Dracula around. But still he hung on and continued hissing at the nuns. "What shall I do now?" she shouted. "Try the windscreen washer. I filled it with holy water before we left the Vatican," replied Sister Mary Vin-cent. Sister Mary Agnes turned on the windscreen washer. The vampire screamed as the holy water burned his skin, but he hung on and contin-ued hissing at the nuns. "Now what?" shouted Sister Mary Agnes. "Well, show him your cross," urged Sister Mary Vincent. "Now you're talking," said Sister Mary Agnes. She opened the win-dow and shouted: “You stupid vam-pire! Get off our car!"

ing the Ark in my garden because it is a development of the site even though in my opinion it is a tempo-rary structure, but the roof is too high. “The Local Area Access Group complained that my ramp was going to be too steep and the inside of the Ark wasn't fully accessible. Getting the wood has been another prob-lem. All the decent trees have Tree Preservation Orders on them and we live in a Site of Special Scientific Interest set up in order to preserve the Spotted Owl. I tried to convince them that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go! “When I started gathering the ani-mals the RSPCA sued me for in-tending to confine wild animals with-out the proper paperwork. The County Council, the Environment Agency and the Rivers Authority have ruled that I can’t build the Ark until they've conducted an Environ-mental Impact Study on your pro-posed flood. The Trade Unions in-sist that I can't use my sons to build the Ark; I can only employ members of the Shipbuilding and Allied Trades union. Finally, Customs and Excise have seized all my assets, claiming I am going to attempt to leave the country illegally with en-dangered species. “So, forgive me Lord, but it will take me at least another ten years to fin-ish this Ark." Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky. “No need for me to destroy the world after all,” observed God. "The government has the matter already in hand.”

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These articles have been reduced, if you would like the full article let me know. Ed Oppressed Christians struggling under Covid-19 Oppression and discrimination against Christians has increased during Covid, says Release Interna-tional, which has launched an appeal to help Christians suffering during the pandemic. Many Christians have been denied food and relief aid and excluded from support systems during lockdown. They have been abandoned by families because of their faith and refused relief by governments and NGOs. In Algeria, many Christians have had to stop work because of the lockdown, and so lost their income. They have been rejected by society and their families as a result of their faith. There is no social security in the country or government support. Eritrean Christians fleeing perse-cution have been barred from refu-gee camps and are unable to get support from UNHCR. And they re-fuse to resort to crime to get the money and supplies they need. In Pakistan the situation is especial-ly hard for converts from a Muslim background. The only form of social security is family support, and Muslim families often withdraw support for family members who change their religion.

In several countries, lockdown has led to an increase in persecution. In Upper Egypt, where Christians face discrimination for their faith, some organisations are allegedly refusing food and support to Chris-tian families. Release partners re-port: “The authorities are helping Muslims but not Christians. And churches that try to help are being closed by police order.” In China, Release partners say the government is using the pandemic to step up its crackdown against Christians. They have accelerated campaigns such as the forced dem-olition of crosses. Pastors have been rounded up for sharing the gospel and distributing facemasks on the street. The authorities have “totally prohibited” online church services and prayer meetings, as “nothing constituting a religious ser-vice is allowed.” In Nigeria, the lockdown deepened the insecurity facing many Christian villagers, who face attacks by Fulani militia. Paul Robinson of Release Interna-tional says: “Right now, it’s up to us in the family of faith to give them our support.” Partners of Release Inter-national are providing food parcels to impoverished Christians in Alge-ria, Ethiopia, Egypt, Nigeria, Paki-stan and Turkey. If you can help, go to: www.releaseinternational.org/covid

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How is your garden growing? This year’s Green Health Awards were just one of many activities to be cancelled because of the current situation. Whilst churches have been closed their gardens have continued to grow and many of these will have been used for therapeutic gardening. But have these been growing wild or have enthusiasts found ways round the rules and regulations to tend and care for them? We would like to find stories of how therapeutic gardening may have been underway despite lockdown. We have already discovered some - the group of gardeners from St Pancras Hospital who volunteer at St Paul’s Woodland Garden in Camden have been missing their weekly visits during lockdown. The garden was the overall winner of the Green Health Awards organised in 2018 by Church Times, The Conservation Foundation and Guild of Health and St Raphael, in association with the Church of England. The Bishop of Carlisle is a great supporter of using church space for

therapeutic gardening projects and as lead bishop for health chairs the church’s Green Health initiative. As he says “Almost everyone agrees that the Coronavirus pandemic has had a significant effect on people’s mental health and wellbeing across the country. That’s why it is more important than ever that we use the green spaces around church build-ings for therapeutic gardening as part of our co-ordinated effort to tackle mental health issues’. If you have some good news from your garden do let David Shreeve know at david.. shreeve@churchofengland.org.

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Though I run through the Valley By Pamela Johnson, Authentic, £9.99 At a time of ethnic cleansing and military dictatorship, being a Chris-tian in predominantly Buddhist My-anmar brought huge risks and dan-ger. Yet despite persecution, one family chose to use the weapon of love to combat evil. 'Though I Run Through the Valley' tells the incredible story of three generations of Karen Christians liv-ing out their love for God and each other by rescuing over 1000 chil-dren who have been orphaned, abandoned or made destitute by their country's upheaval. Theirs is not a story of merely evading the enemy and surviving, but instead one of seeking out the vulnerable and teaching them how to thrive. Daring to trust God against all the odds, this is the powerful sto-ry of one family's sacrifice over many years to protect and show the love of Christ to many lost chil-dren in Myanmar.

Wet Physics Professor: “What happens when the human body is immersed in warm water?” Student: “The telephone rings.” Decide Politician to aide: “About their charge that I’m indecisive – do you think I should answer it, or let it go, or an-swer it in part, or what?” Straightforward Admirer to political candidate: Great speech sir! I really like the straight-forward way you dodged the issues. Shakes Politician: a fellow who shakes your hand before the election and shakes you after the election. Needed What this country needs is fewer people who know what this country needs. Political career American teacher to students: “Be diligent and steadfast, and you will succeed. Take the case of George Washington, our first ever president. Do you remember my telling you of the great difficulty that George Washington had to face? The big problem that could have been the end of his political career?” “Sure,” said a student. “He couldn’t tell a lie.”

Why, What, Where, How? How does the guy who drives the snow plough get to work in the mornings?

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FOOD FOR THOUGHT….. My father and I enjoyed the same pies, cheese and onion, mince and onion, meat and potato but especially apple pies, with hot custard. When my father died in 2016 I, like other people do, busied myself with the funeral preparations. I’m glad I had the love and support of family and church community. I was also glad that Dad knew he had to sort things out (aged 94 and a half!!) and had arranged his funeral. We were therefore able to carry out his wishes and not mine. I’m happy we talked it all through—what he wanted, type of service and where he wanted his ashes scattered. He chose the reading and three hymns. He wanted some ashes with Mam in Barrow cemetery and some on the top of Scafell (two of my brothers completed this task). He talked to the Chaplain in St. Mary’s Hospice at length and was ready to meet his maker. He also chose for us not to be there with him so it wouldn't upset us. The nurse was there though and said he went peacefully. After clearing out his house, cleaning up and handing the keys back to the council I thought I would then have time to rest and concentrate on church work but God had other plans! A third heart attack had me in hospital at Barrow and Blackpool again, and had me resting for more weeks than I had planned. Dad died in the January and as winter turned into spring, and I was back on my feet, all the flowers began to emerge and they all reminded me of Dad and of the garden he tended so lovingly. Before I gave the keys back I took some of Dad’s plants and they are now in my garden. I think of him every time they flower. Caroline Hodgson wrote on the same subject— “Matthew 8:22 is an intriguing and troubling verse that I believe, in the weeks following my father's death, I came to understand anew: “Follow me, and let the dead bury their own dead.” Jesus isn’t saying that it’s unchristian to hold a funeral, but that there is nothing—but nothing—more important than discipleship. In loss you become the centre of attention, particularly in a close church community which—thank God—my father had. My brother and I were shielded from the icy blast of grief by the love and warmth that surrounded us and I accepted it gratefully. But I came to realise that I had to maintain my own capacity to love, which is an essential part of discipleship, or it would just become a one-way ego trip. And it would have been far better not to have had a funeral at all, than to allow that.”

Pies

27th Sept HARVEST THANKSGIVING 10am Holy Communion at St. Peter’s 11.30am Baptism at St. Peter’s 3rd Oct 11.30am Baptism at St. Peter’s 4th Oct HARVEST THANKSGIVING 10am Holy Communion at St. Mary’s 11th Oct 18th SUNDAY AFTER TRINITY 10am Holy Communion at St. Peter’s 18th Oct 19th SUNDAY AFTER TRINITY (St. Luke) 10am Holy Communion at St. Mary’s Annual Parochial Meeting 25th Oct LAST SUNDAY AFTER TRINITY Bible Sunday 10am Holy Communion at St. Peter’s 1st Nov ALL SAINTS’ DAY 10am Holy Communion at St. Mary’s

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Why, What, Where, How? How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?

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SERVICES FOR THE MONTH Every Sunday at St. Mary’s: 9.30am Parish Communion Every Sunday at St. Peter’s: 11.15 am Parish Communion Every Wednesday at St. Mary’s: 10.30am Holy Communion 2nd Sunday of the Month 8am BCP Holy Communion Messy Church 2nd Sunday of the Month at 3pm

Centre Bookings: Sylvia Stoker (467173) Church Meditation Group: 2.15-4pm Lady Chapel Alison MacMahon (343621) Organisations meeting in The Centre: Mothers’ Union: Branch Leader: Mrs. Doris Hall (462742) Second Monday of the month at 7pm First Wednesday of the month at 2pm Sunday School: Sunday Morning 9.30—10.30am ‘Serendipity’: Monday from 9.30am—11.00am ‘Rhythm Time’ Friday from 9am—12 noon Dalton Local History Society: 1st Wednesday of Month 8pm Church Schools: St. Mary, Dalton Head: Lynda Woodburn (462729) St. Peter, Ireleth Head: Rachael McFarlane (462753) Other Organizations: Uniformed Groups: Rainbows, Brownies, Guides Contact: Mrs. Alison Wall (464559) Beavers, Cubs, Scouts, Explorer Scouts, Scout Network: Contact: Jane Thatcher GSL 1st Duddon (07557507418)

Vicar: Rev Canon Ruth Crossley The Vicarage, Market Place (462526) Email: vicar@daltonparish.co.uk Contact: “Business Hour” for both churches—each MONDAY EVENING 5pm—6pm in St. Mary’s Church Centre (located behind St. Mary’s church) Phone: 462526 E-mail: admin@daltonparish.co.uk Curate: Rev Amiee Lynch (836332) Email: revdalynch@gmail.com Churchwardens: St. Mary’s: Mrs. Joan Milburn (828509) Mrs. Barbara Irwin (467470) St. Peter’s Mrs. Beverley Louw (07841380801) Church Council Officers: Secretary: Jackie Barnsfield (585452) Treasurer: Jacqueline Preston (464584) Stewardship: Mrs. Jill Corris (464349) Electoral Roll: Jennifer Tomlinson (468273) Verger: Mrs. Kathleen Churchman (466474) St. Mary Organist: Choir: Practice St. Peter Organist: Bell Ringers: Contact: Jacqueline Preston (464584) Practice - Tuesday from 7.30pm in the Tower Magazine: Editor: Barbara Irwin (467470) E-mail: attillahun@tiscali.co.uk