Avoiding the Power Struggle

Presented by the Behavior Support Team

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Norms○ Minimize distractions

(phones, conversations, etc.)○ Collaborate & Communicate○ Take care of your needs

Agenda

❖ Intro❖ What is a Power Struggle?❖ Relationships❖ Nonverbal & Paraverbal Communication❖ Verbal De-escalation❖ Setting Limits❖ Wrap-Up

That kid...

Today we will learn how to control our

responses to behavior in order to decrease power

struggles

ObjectiveWhat is a

power struggle?

Defending one’s authority or credibility

Types of Power Struggles

Personal button pushing

Bringing up the past history or irrelevant issues

Making empty threats and issuing ultimatums

Why is this important?

● It is a quick method to de-escalate a student● It keeps you in control● Prevents students from feeding off of the attention

of the class or others● Breaks the cycle of escalation, tension, intensity, etc● Reduces the likelihood of further physical, verbal,

and other conflict● Helps teach students that engaging in power

struggles is futile and will not get them what/where they want

● Helps you, the adult, remain calm, clear headed, and more able to make good decisions and actions

Adapted from PBISWorld.com

Watch for the signs… Catch it early!

● When a student is trying to verbally engage you in an argument● When a student becomes agitated, aggressive or threatening● When the issue the student is arguing about is not essential, important, or

crucial (choose your battles wisely)● When a student can’t seem to drop it● When a student just wants to be correct, right, or win● When a student seems to be taking it personally and cannot handle the

issue, topic, etc● When giving directives, directions, corrections, or reprimands

Relationships

Precipitating Factors Can you pass the birthday test?

Nonverbal & Paraverbal

Communication

Nonverbal Communication● Proxemics

○ Personal Space

● Kinesics○ Body Language

● Haptics○ Communication

through touch

● Position○ Where you are in relation to others

● Posture○ How you hold and move your body

● Proximity○ Distance between individuals

Supportive Stance

Communicates respect - Nonthreatening - Maintains safety

Tone Volume Cadence

Paraverbal Communication

Verbal De-escalation

● Use empathic listening: ○ Be nonjudgmental ○ Give undivided attention○ Allow silence○ Use restatement to clarify○ Listen for underlying messages

Empathy & Understanding

Pivot!

● This is the ability to say yes instead of no, but still mean the same thing.

● Instead of “No, you can’t take a break right now,” say “Yes, you may take a break after you finish those two problems.”

Reframe● Using a child’s imagination and play to

encourage a desired behavior.

● Ex. clean up song, pretending to be a mouse in the hallway, etc.

What activities are usually met with resistance?

How could you reframe them?

Shared Control

● Offer choices wherever possible

○ I need my child to get dressed for school, but the choice of shirt is up to him.

○ I need the students to start working, but where they sit is up to them.

Love & Logic

● Enforceable Statements / Words of gold

● One liners

● Bookmark handout

“I can see that you really want to wear your sandals today even though it’s raining outside (empathy). I think if you do that, your feet will get cold and wet so I don’t recommend it(preview), but it’s up to you (power sharing). Please decide and let’s get ready to go.”

Let’s Practice!

Setting Limits

Offer Choices & Consequences

● Simple & Clear● Reasonable● Enforceable

Types of Limits

● Interrupt & Redirect● When & Then● If & Then

Walk away!

Wrap up

Handouts

* 2 x 10*Practice Academies*One liners/power struggles*PBISworld.com*Enforceable Statements

ResourcesWebsiteQuestions?

Behavior Support Team Website

Follow us on Twitter @AllenBehaviorST