melanie marks when kyle came back 2

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WHEN KYLE CAME BACK

By Melanie Marks

Copyright 2011 Melanie Marks

All Rights Reserved.



CHAPTER 1

I was at the mall with my best friend, Nine. We were done shopping. We’d spent all our money

re just looking, browsing, wishing—girl stuff. Then we came to this huge art display at the back

ll. It was where the sunglass kiosk used to be. Now they just put up seasonal stuff there. Sometim

d the Easter Bunny, or Santa. Sometimes it was empty. But now it had a big sign that read “Y

tists” and there was a maze of cool art displays.

“Young Artists,” I mused, reading the sign aloud.

“Young and hot!” Nine grabbed a brochure about one of the artists.

I looked over her shoulder, only feigning interest. Nine isn’t exactly discriminatory. But once I lo

y stomach did a funny flip thing. It wasn’t just because the guy on the cover was smokin’ hot. Th

ah, he totally was. But he looked kind of familiar too. Somehow. Only … I didn’t know how. I m

dn’t know any stars or models and this guy had to be one. Had to. He was gorgeous. But still, ther

mething about him—something familiar.

I wanted to grab the brochure out of Nine’s hands and study it. My palms itched to snatch it from

t no; instead I shoved my hands in my pockets like a good girl, only murmuring, “He looks familia

“Yeah. He’s from my dreams.” Nine tucked the brochure into her Hollister bag. “He’s the hunk t

ways sticking his tongue down my throat.”

“Oh. That’s where I’ve seen him— your dreams.” I tried sounding less interested than I actually

truth, I wanted to tackle Nine and make off with that brochure, be alone with it.

But if I asked Nine for it she was going to tease me. She always teased me about guys. It was be

was still dating Chase Cole, my one and only boyfriend. (Unless you counted my childhood play

le. He kissed me on the ear when I was seven. Nine didn’t count that, though.)

As soon as I turned sixteen, old enough to date, Chase claimed me as his girlfriend, branding m

lettermen’s jacket. I never dated a single other guy, ever. But Nine was the one that had issues

t, not me. Chase was handsome and popular, and now president of our senior class. And just fo

ord, he was sweet and kind and all of that stuff too. So I saw no reason to complain. That didn’

ne, though. She thought I needed to “try another flavor.” Seriously, those were her words. When



mplained about Chase (which was really, really seldom—really) she would always say it, l

ntra, “Rain, try another flavor.”

Apparently there had been some awesome speech given at our girls’ camp over the summer

ssed due to spending most of camp hugging the toilet, puking my guts out. Evidently the awe

eech had been about dating, and how it’s not wise to get all exclusive with a guy in high school, th

ould be exploring and learning who we are and what we like—that kind of stuff. The speaker use

alogy that guys are like ice cream, and sure, we may discover we like vanilla, really, really like i

we don’t give other flavors a chance we may end up missing out on the real love of our lives—e, Rocky Road.

Standing here in the mall, sure, I had to admit the guy on the cover of that brochure had looke

cky Road. But I’d only gotten a quick glimpse of him before Nine stashed him in her bag. So

ows?

I gave up on getting a better look at the brochure, though. No way was I going to ask Nine for it.

uldn’t lift it off her either. She had it securely stowed away with her sweaters and skirts.

I shrugged it off. The guy probably did modeling on the side. Most likely that’s where I’d seen

fore—in one of Nine’s teen magazines.

So that was that … or so I thought.

Nine and I wandered through the art exhibits. They were all really good, but one artist’s display

de me stop and take notice, like stare. All of his drawings were done in charcoal. To me they

e-inspiring.

“Wow … wow … WOW ,” I kept murmuring as we wandered through his large collection. Then corner of my eye, I caught sight of something that made me shriek. “Drake Meadows!”

I whisked Nine over to the drawings of my favorite singer.

“Can I help you?”

I turned, surprised by the unexpected voice. Male voice.

“Uh …” I stammered.

My brain turned to Jell-o and I tripped over my own feet. It was the artist! Model-boy from

ochure Nine had stuffed in her Hollister bag.

“My walls are covered with Drake Meadows,” I told him. Like the guy gave a fig how I decorat

om. Still, I went on sort of rambling. “I—uh, love him,” I squeaked, avoiding the guy’s eyes be

y were mesmerizing … and staring straight into mine.

He wet his bottom lip, eyeing the distance between us, then his eyes trailed back to me. “L

ake,” he murmured.



Prrrrr .

I swallowed, chastising myself— Chase, remember Chase. But um, it was hard. I could b

member my own name. Or remember to breathe. The guy—his stare—it was hungry, ravenous.

s he looking at me like that? It made me an oozing, confused mess and had my heart galloping so

s sure he could hear it.

I quickly turned away, looking at his drawings, anywhere but directly at him, knowing if I look

lost. I’m a sucker for hungry eyes. I just am. I could tell his would keep me up nights, dreaming. Us being a horrible girlfriend. Bad, bad, bad.

“Are these for sale?”

Once I asked the question, I felt dumb. Of course they were for sale. That’s what the “young ar

re here for, to sell their work.

But the guy didn’t say, “Duh, get lost mall girl.”

Instead, without his eyes leaving mine, he gave a slight nod, indicating to the sign on my leftce listings.

The way he was staring was making me sweat. It was his eyes. They were searching me, drink

y every move. It had every nerve in my body on alert. Still, I tried to act like a rational, in-contr

r-heart human being. I studied the list as though I was actually considering making a purchase.

sn’t. I couldn’t. His drawings were expensive—at least too expensive for me. I’d just finished bl

little money I had on a Drake Meadows CD. I was broke. I couldn’t even afford French fries.

Still, I found it difficult to tell him. Actually, to say anything. Because I accidently glanced ines, totally not on purpose, I swear. It’s just … his kept seeking mine.

And then, I heard this voice, in my head. His voice. “Look at me.”

And so, confused, I did, and then I was suddenly in a trance, staring into his eyes. They were bea

brown and seductive. Yet staring into them made me think of my childhood for some reason, of

d grass and the meadow out behind my house, even the woods beyond. It was strange and intoxic

de me dizzy.

His eyes. They wrapped me in a hug, clobbered me in a clumsy, sweet kiss. They were warm and

d somehow familiar, but totally seductive. And hypnotic. Once I dared look into them, I couldn’t

ay.

I don’t know how long we stood like that, with our gazes locked. In that time I couldn’t breath

ne move, yet somehow I found myself closer to him, as though without my even knowing he had d

near.

He reached out, I think to touch my cheek or maybe my hair, and I think a protest escaped my

nk. But I’m not sure. Maybe I made no sound, maybe the sound woke me. Not sure. But all at o



apped awake. I remembered—Chase, Nine, the mall, me.

I jumped away as though the guy was on fire, looking back at the price listings as though I’d

dying them the whole time.

“I can’t afford you,” I told him, my voice raspy and breathless, my knees weak. I was just cons

ough to be regretful, wishing I hadn’t bought that puffer jacket last week. At least then I could

ught one of his smaller drawings, a really small one.

“They’re wonderful, though,” I said, grabbing Nine as I backed away, trying to make a gracefu

ce my entrance had been from Dorks-ville. “Good luck with your promising career.”

“Which is your favorite?” the guy asked.

I turned back to him, alarmingly thrilled that he didn’t let me just walk away, that he actually w

talk to me. “My what?”

“Your favorite drawing.”

“Oh.” That was easy.

“This one,” I said, pointing to the drawing of Drake leaning against a brick wall. He was strum

guitar, and in a very cool way, the words to his song “Come Back to Me” were etched int

ckground, into the brick of the wall. It made the drawing look haunting and painful, yet at the same

autiful. Just like the song.

“Yeah? I like that one too.” He stared at the painting a moment, then his eyes flicked back to

’s yours.”

I blinked. “Huh?”

“The drawing. You can have it.”

My heart did a little jumpy thing, a thrilled-to-death jumpy thing. Only … I couldn’t accep

uldn’t.

Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, “I have a boyfriend.”

The guy grinned, seeming amused. “I wasn’t asking you for a date.”

I reddened. I’m such a dork! Of course I only imagined—totally fantasized—his staring at me lik

all I-want-you-to-be-mine-like. I probably only imagined our trance too. Of course I did. Get rea

y was a model. Of course he dated other models—not teenage art groupies from the mall.

I was grateful there was suddenly a distraction. It saved me from trying to cover for my embarra

urtation (which I know isn’t really a word).

His cell phone rang, playing a Drake song. I was going to back away, give him privacy to talk



n he did something totally swoon-worthy. He didn’t answer the call; he didn’t even check it. Inste

cked it off, his eyes never leaving mine.

“You remind me of someone I used to know,” he said. “She was nice.”

“Oh.”

That was all I could say— Oh. Not Who was she? Not Did you love her? Just, “Oh.” Becau

ice sounded forlorn and lost. Obviously he loved her. Loved her deeply and it was tragic for

aybe she died?

His eyes were still on me, still hypnotic as anything, but now they looked tortured and wistfu

aybe they had the whole time. Maybe I just didn’t notice before because I’d been confusing my fe

his.

I figured that’s why he seemed so drawn to me, though. Why he seemed to be drinking in my

ove. I hadn’t imagined that after all. Only, he hadn’t been longing for me, he was longing for her.

With great effort—it seemed—he finally pulled his gaze from me, to his drawing of Drake. He ht to me. “You can have it … if you want it.”

“Well …” I said.

Of course I wanted it. Really, really wanted it. Incredibly bad. But I didn’t want to take advanta

guy and his sadness or his incredibly hot niceness. After all, I had heard the term “starving a

tists need to be paid for their work. That’s how they make their money. They can’t go around giv

ay.

“I can’t,” I told him finally.

“Yes, she can,” Nine interjected, taking the picture. “She’s a total Drake freak. Her room is co

th pictures of him. She’ll put this on her wall and think of you every night.” Nine stuck my hand o

guy to shake. “This is Rain, by the way. She thanks you immensely.”

The guy came closer, to take my hand—but, of course, I jumped back. And kind of shrieked. Wh

barrassing, but that’s my life. And that’s what I did.

He tilted his head, not saying anything. He just watched my reaction with sober interest, his eye

mine.

I bit my lip, embarrassed.

I wanted to explain why I acted like that, like a freak, why I didn’t take his hand. But it wa

mplicated and embarrassing and wrong. The truth was, I was too enraptured by him. But it wasn’

t to Chase, not to our relationship. I needed to run away and never see this guy again.

“I need to go,” I said.



At the same moment, a tall, imposing woman in an expensive business suit vied for his attention

itlin Klein,” she said, handing him her card. “I’m very interested in your work.”

I heard her say all that as I ran away.

“No Rain, wait!” Artist Hunk called after me, but I kept running.



CHAPTER 2

Out in the parking lot Nine sulked in the car. “Why couldn’t you be normal for just one second

e second? That guy was yummy hot.” She paused for a moment like she was done wringing me ou

n she went on as though she’d never stopped, “And he was into you, big time.”

What a laugh.

“He wasn’t interested in me.” I felt my face reddening at the memory. “He said so himself, he d

nt to date me.”

That silenced her. For a second. Obviously, she’d forgotten about that. She stared ahead, focus

mall traffic as though she was a skillful driver. Then she sighed, “That’s not exactly what he said

I shrugged, staring at my drawing of Drake. Thank goodness Nine had lugged it out to the car aft

ak show exit.

“It’s the gist of what he said. Nine, he’s an amazing, talented artist, and a model . He probably

ver girls and actresses, not normal, everyday girls he meets at the mall.”

“Right,” Nine snapped, sounding annoyed. “But let’s face it, you’re not a normal, everyday g

u’re gorgeous. You could have any guy you want. You could have tons of dates, but no, you’re cha

Chase.”

The color drained out of my face. Sometimes I did feel chained to Chase lately. Sometimes. A

. But it was stupid to feel that way. Chase was an awesome boyfriend. Every girl in school wou

illed to be in my shoes—even Nine, though she’d never admit it. Sometimes I caught her star

ase all dreamy-eyed, just like every other girl in school.

I slunk down in my seat knowing I was lucky to be Chase’s girlfriend . There was no question ab

was lucky.

Still, what was up with that artist guy? Why did he make me feel so … I couldn’t think of the w

dn’t even try. Instead, I shook my head, trying to shake away the memory of him, ‘cause thoughts o

de me feel disloyal and guilty.



I sighed. “I’m not chained to Chase. We’re normal. He’s my boyfriend.”

Nine raised an eyebrow. “Are you trying to convince me of that or yourself?”

Ugh. I stared at my Drake Meadows portrait not answering. Nine knew me too well. It was irritat

“Whatever,” Nine sounded sort of mad. “I would have totally gone for that guy if I had the chan

one second, he looked at me the way he looked at you, I would have jumped on him. In a hear

t what did you do? You ran away!”

I bit my lip. Okay, I over-reacted in the mall. I knew that. But the guy had me dizzy, stirring me u

y, then the other. It was confusing and I didn’t know how to behave.

I stared at my drawing some more, defensive and sullen. “He said he didn’t want to date m

umbled. He’d kind of laughed about it, like the thought was funny.

“Well,” Nine was thoughtful, “maybe he’s shy.”

I rolled my eyes. “He was not shy.”

She laughed. “No, he wasn’t was he?”

We sat quiet for a moment and I deluded myself, thinking maybe Nine was finally on to contemp

mething that didn’t involve me and Hot Guy. Finally. But then she dogged me, talking about him a

Maybe he only said that because you embarrassed him. I mean, you just blurted it out of nowhere, ‘

oyfriend!’ What was that?”

I just lifted up my hands, like I don’t know . Aren’t you supposed to tell guys that? I mean, beforto all the effort of asking you out? Then again, he wasn’t going to ask me out. Grrr!

Nine went on. “That had to be a blow to his ego.”

I stared out the window watching the California palm trees go by, then back at my drawing. His

d twinkled. I didn’t ask you for a date. Groan! “I think he’ll survive.”

“ I could help him feel better,” Nine said. Then she moaned. “Geez! The way you guys looked at

her—there were sparks.”

I bit my lip, having to agree. There had been sparks. But did that trance thing happen for real? O

t part only in my head? The whole experience was kind of fuzzy now. Of course I’d been confuse

ozy through the whole thing. That didn’t help.

***



That night I couldn’t sleep, not just because Nine was staying over. I kept thinking about Artist

ne was thinking about him too, apparently. She wouldn’t shut up about him. She kept telling m

ie tale about what happened after I ran off in the mall.

Nine said she told Artist Guy “Thanks,” and not to take my hasty exit personally, that I was pract

rried.

Artist Guy frowned at that, but all he said was, “Don’t forget to give Rain the picture.”

Right as he said that there was a huge crowd of people that came by, for a moment separating

m Nine. “When they passed, he was gone,” Nine said. “Like disappeared.”

When she told me that, I got goose bumps. But it was silly, of course. He probably just walked

en she wasn’t looking to make a sale or something. That lady in the suit had been really interes

work. Maybe he went off to talk with her.

I didn’t want to discuss the guy anymore; it made my stomach feel funny—fluttery and antsy an

od-girlfriend-like. I changed the subject. “Thanks for going with me to the mall today.”

Nine filed her nails. “Well, it would have been worth it if you would have hooked up with that gu

I groaned. “Nine, he wasn’t interested in me.” Then I reminded her, “You got that cute skirt.”

“Oh yeah.” She smiled. “It is cute, huh?”

I nodded, feeling groggy, but still too wired to sleep. It was strange how today went. I’d plann

end the afternoon studying; I had a vocabulary test the next day AND a Spanish quiz. But when I

dying, I couldn’t concentrate. I kept feeling this impulse, like a need, that I should go to the mow, I know, it sounds strange. But that’s what happened. Really.

So, I dragged Nine to the mall. Usually it’s the other way around. Usually, she drags me there, bu

t today. She really didn’t want to go.

“We’ll only stay a little while,” I promised her as I made her drive, not even sure why I was do

going to the mall in the first place. It’s not like I had any money. I just for some reason wanted

lly bad.

However, once we got to the mall, Nine got into the spirit. I knew she would. The mall is her pla

kes her glow.

Now she sat searching through her Hollister bag for her skirt. She pulled it out, admiring it. “

de you think to go to the mall today?”

That was a very good question, but I didn’t have an answer. I yawned, mumbling, “I don’t know,

led over to study my new picture some more. It was up on my wall now, right next to my bed. I

re so I could stare at beautiful Drake Meadows every night as I fell to sleep. But staring at the dra

w, I noticed something I hadn’t before—the signature on the drawing. It was signed Smoky Shadow



I stared at it a long time, amazed I hadn’t noticed before.

When I finally showed it to Nine, she laughed. “I used to love that show.” She yawned, f

unding tired. “I always dreamed I would grow up and marry that guy—Smoky Shadows.”

I smiled, embarrassed because Smoky Shadows was a cartoon character, but yeah, I’d had a m

ush on him too, just like Nine.

I used to always make my childhood friend, Kyle, act out scenes from the show with me. I’d mak

Smoky while I was always Sasha, the beautiful girl that was forever getting into trouble.

The way the show went, Smoky was always saying he didn’t love Sasha—because she was prom

another guy and he couldn’t have her—but Smoky was constantly keeping an eye on her, cons

ving her from one mishap to the next. Every episode he put his life on the line for Sasha. He so

r. Even if he said he didn’t. It was romantic.

“I wanted to marry him too,” I murmured as I drifted off to sleep.



CHAPTER 3

This morning we had a new guy in our English class. I didn’t actually see him, as I was

ntically studying for our vocabulary test. Every time I glanced up to take a peek at him he

rounded by females. But I heard all the girls in class whispering about him. Apparently, he w

ttie. I was sure I’d hear all about him from Nine, probably before second period.

But then we didn’t have our vocabulary test as I’d expected. Instead Mrs. Springsteed, our tearted lecturing on the life of Robert Frost. She roamed around the classroom as she spoke, just a

ways did, speaking quick and unyielding. I started taking notes, writing like a mad woman, but sud

s. Springsteed stopped lecturing. Just stopped. I glanced up, wondering “What the …?” She

nding in front of New Boy, studying something on his desk.

“Very nice,” she said, sounding impressed with whatever he had been working on. I couldn’t

, not him or what she was remarking about. I was sitting across the room now frustrated with int

s. Springsteed was blocking my view.

But then, holy crow. To my amazement, she picked up the guy’s work and strode across the roo

. Me! That would have had me floored in itself, only that was nothing compared to what I was sud

ring at. My jaw dropped, probably to the floor. I was mesmerized. I mean, I couldn’t look a

cause now I had full view of New Boy. Only, he wasn’t just New Boy, not to me. He was Artist H

m the mall.

Once I saw him, our gazes locked. His warm brown eyes smiled at me, caressed me, told m

eetest things, childhood things. What the …?! I couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, definitely co

nk. All there was in the world, the only thing, was him. And me.

But Mrs. Springsteed snapped me out of my trance, fast.

“Here you go, Miss Tolley,” she said, placing Artist Hunk’s work on my desk. I stared down a

per as everyone around me gasped ohhs and awes, gawking at New Boy’s work. My heart gallop

chest so wild I was sure the whole class could hear it.

What had New Boy been working on that had everyone so excited? A drawing … of me. O

sn’t me.



I stared at the drawing as I heard the squeals and whispered chattering around me, heard: “He

in look like an angel.”

And that was exactly what he had done. He’d drawn me as though I was a beautiful angel—glo

d my long hair golden and flowing and radiant. I had wings, but no halo, instead it was like

nshine radiating from me, as though my entire being was a halo.

My heart fluttered—like it had wings.

I couldn’t take my eyes off the drawing. I stared at it all through class, fixated. When the bell r

l sat staring at the breathtaking fantasy. Why did he do this?

It was confusing … confounding. I couldn’t figure it out. Why an angel? Why me? It made no sens

Artist Hunk silently came and sat in the desk beside me. He didn’t say a word, didn’t make a soun

ly watched me study his drawing.

“Rain, look at me,” he said.

Startled, I started to look up, curious what made him say such a thing. But just then Chase bound

r classroom. My gaze immediately flicked to him as he stood in the doorway, looking big and hand

d all football-hero like. Mmmm Chase.

“Rain, come on, babe,” he said, giving Artist Guy a cursory glance. “We’re going to be late.”

I swallowed, bouncing back into the real world. The world full of classes and school and test

ase. Angels and mysterious guys didn’t belong here. They just … didn’t. I liked my life—just as i

idn’t need mystery.

“Uh, yeah, okay,” I murmured.

My legs were shaky as I shot up, but I dashed to Chase anyway, not looking back at Artist Guy. S

uld feel his eyes on me as we left the classroom.

I could feel him frown.



CHAPTER 4

I found my palms sweating as I stood at Kyle Ryan’s front door. Somehow, I couldn’t bring mys

ock. Maybe I should just wait until tonight , I told myself. Wait for the party as Mrs. Ryan

tructed .

But I couldn’t wait. I couldn’t. This moment was too important. It meant too much to me.

Still, I’d done my best. I’d tried waiting. Really. Only I’m not good at that sort of thing—waitin

impulsive person. And my impulse was to see Kyle—now. Immediately. Still, I had waited at lea

ur. Or, well, almost an hour. Anyway, I had waited. But I couldn’t wait any longer. I had to see him

Kyle had been my childhood playmate, but more than that, really—a lot more. He had been m

yfriend. And although we had only been eight, he’d given me my first kiss. Admittedly, it had be

y ear, but to me it still counted.

When Kyle was abducted nine years ago, a part of me had been abducted as well—my heart. I mpletely healed from the trauma of losing my best friend. But now a fantastic miracle had happ

le was back!

This afternoon, when Mom said Mrs. Ryan was on the phone for me, I had been sorta surprised.

an used to call me constantly to baby-sit her daughter, Cherri. But now that Cherri was ten, Mrs.

rdly called.

Still, that’s what I assumed the call was about. I assumed Mrs. Ryan wanted me to baby-sit. W

rned what the call was really about a rush of tears sprang to my eyes. Tears of complete, utter joy

I had to sit to keep from falling, but then had to stand, certain I was going to explode. “He’s—

lly home?”

“Yes,” Mrs. Ryan sobbed. “My Kyle. He’s home!”

I couldn’t believe it. It was too wonderful to be true. After years had gone by without a clue of K

ereabouts, it seemed everyone had quietly given him up as dead.

“He’s been home for almost a month now,” Mrs. Ryan explained apologetically. “But we haven’



ling people. We wanted him to get settled in without the press making a circus out of his return …”

She went on, giving excuses that I didn’t need to hear. I only wanted to see Kyle. “I’ll be right ov

d her excitedly.

“Well, no, wait,” she said hastily. “We’re having a family party for him tonight. To celebrat

urn.”

“Oh.”

“I know it’s short notice,” she went on, “but would you come to that?—our family party?”

“Of course,” I told her, touched that she considered me part of their family. But I didn’t want to

til tonight to see Kyle. I couldn’t wait. And I didn’t want to see him at a party anyway. I wanted

ne with him—so we could talk—just the two of us. I couldn’t see that happening at a party thro

honor—a party full of people that hadn’t seen him in nine years. Kyle would be mobbed. He wo

ve a free moment for me.

“Couldn’t I just sneak over really quick?” I asked. After all, I lived just down the block.

Mrs. Ryan hesitated. “No, I don’t think that would be a good idea,” she said. “He’s still … adjus

s. Ryan went on to say that Kyle had gotten into some trouble while he was away—trouble wi

w. The Ryans weren’t seeing that as such a bad thing, however, since Kyle’s arrest was how the

m back. “The New York police called telling us they had him in custody,” Mrs. Ryan concluded.

d been involved in a hold up.”

I gulped. “A hold up?”

Mrs. Ryan sighed. “Yes. Poor Kyle has been through a lot while he has been away from us.”

We were silent for a moment, imagining all of the horrible things that Kyle must have had to endu

“I know I can trust you to keep Kyle’s— problems —from circulating,” Mrs. Ryan said. “I just w

make sure you understood. Kyle will need time to get used to being home, and being in a loving

vironment.”

Was she tactfully trying to tell me to back off? Or was she warning me that being around Kyle ma

safe? I wasn’t sure.

“But please do come tonight,” Mrs. Ryan urged. “I think it will be good for him to see you. Perh

ll bring back some happy memories.”

“Does he remember me?” I asked hopefully.

Again, Mrs. Ryan hesitated. “Kyle doesn’t seem to remember much about his life with us—very

fact. The doctor he’s been seeing says Kyle may have a slight memory block.”

“His doctor?”



This all seemed very hard for Mrs. Ryan to talk about, but I wanted to know everything.

“The New York Police let us bring Kyle home without pressing charges on the condition we ge

ychiatric help,” Mrs. Ryan explained. “Kyle has been seeing a Dr. Strong. He’s a good man.”

“Oh. Well … that’s good,” I said awkwardly. “Well,” I didn’t know what else to say, as I could s

e was reluctant to tell me anything more. “I’ll see you tonight.”

I sat staring at the phone long after Mrs. Ryan had hung up. Goose bumps covered my body. An a

racle happened. Kyle was home!

I couldn’t believe it. I sat on my bed, filled with awe and amazement. But I had confusing, jum

otions. On the one hand, I was thrilled, of course, that Kyle was back, thrilled beyond words. B

other, I was miserable. Miserable to hear that he had had such a rough time. Being involved in a

—what horrible events had led him to that?

Still, I wanted to see Kyle. Learning he had problems didn’t change that at all. I wanted to be the

m, to help him adjust as much as I could. And I figured I could help him at school too. I could showund and introduce him to people. And Chase could help with that as well. Actually, he could h

Chase was Mr. Popularity. Mr. Athlete. Just being around Chase at Roosevelt meant you were “i

I went to my closet, hunting for my “Kyle Box.” It was full of Kyle things—things I’d ke

member him by. I knew it was in my closet somewhere, but it had been almost a year sinc

mmaged through it. Finally, I found it in the way back, covered with shoes.

The box was full of pictures of the two of us, some Mom had taken, and some had been taken

oto booth in the mall. But there were also a lot of pictures that Kyle had drawn himself. Those wees I cherished the most. Seeing them now, filled me with wonder. Kyle was really home. It didn’t

ssible.

I searched deeper through the box, finding a poem Kyle had written me in third grade during clas

y. It said, “Roses are red. Violets are blue. I love Rain. And always will too.”

Reading the poem now, made me cry. Little, sweet Kyle. He had been so loving and so good.

uld he have grown to be involved in a hold up? I couldn’t believe it. It didn’t seem possible. I c

box. Kyle needed to see this. Now.

I grabbed my sweater and forgot all about Mrs. Ryan’s wishes for me to wait to see Kyle unt

rty. That is, until I got to his house.

But now, standing at the Ryan’s front door, I was afraid to knock. Would Mrs. Ryan be mad?

at about Kyle? Would he be mean to me? It had been so long since I’d last seen him, and it sound

ough he had changed a lot. Suddenly, I was filled with worry that this may not have been a good id

But I couldn’t get my feet to turn around and leave. I wanted to see Kyle. No matter what he was

nted to help him.



I took a deep breath and rang the doorbell. If Mrs. Ryan sent me away, then I’d go, no big dea

ybe she would understand. Maybe she would let me in if I showed her my box—showed her

nted to remind Kyle of all the good times we’d had together.

But Mrs. Ryan wasn’t the one that answered the door. Instead it was answered by the most bea

y I had ever seen. He leaned against the doorframe, his seductive brown eyes fixed on mine. “Wi

ok at me now, Rain?”

My jaw dropped. My hot artist—he was Kyle! Kyle! I knew he’d looked familiar. But I’d convyself that he was a model from a magazine. That that’s where I’d seen him before.

Staring at him now, I was dumbstruck. This moment—it was too incredible to be real. It couldn

le Ryan—my childhood sweetheart—was my artist?!



CHAPTER 5

I stood staring at Artist Guy—Kyle—in the doorway, trying to cover my shock, because that’s w

when I’m flustered; I pretend I’m not.

“Uh … Kyle—hi. Yeah, it’s me, Rain. I’m not stalking you though,” I told him, trying to smile an

though this wasn’t the most astonishing moment that ever happened in my entire life—as thoug

s just an everyday, ordinary encounter. “It’s just … I didn’t recognize you in class, or at the mad him hastily. “But I do remember you, Kyle. I never forgot, not ever. Look,” I showed him my b

e I needed proof, “I kept pictures, I have pictures.”

Kyle glanced at the closed box, then up at me again. “Do you want to come up to my room?”

“Your … room?”

He raised his eyebrows. “My room.”

“Uh, sure.” I don’t know why I felt so anxious about it. I’d been in his room millions of times. Bu

ain, we had only been eight. And he hadn’t committed any major felonies.

I followed him up the stairs, noticing that his house was awfully quiet. “Is your mom around?”

“No. She took Cherri to dance class or somewhere.”

Kyle must have noticed that I stopped following. He turned back to me. “Is that a problem?”

“Uh, no. Only … why don’t we stay downstairs?” I asked, unable to make myself move in ection—up or down. I just stood frozen where I was.

Kyle looked into my eyes. “Are you afraid of me?”

I bit my lip, unsure how to answer. Was I afraid of him? I looked into his eyes, trying to conjure u

age of Kyle as I had known him—as a sweet, innocent little boy. Despite his tattoos and

pearance now, it wasn’t hard to summon the image. His warm brown eyes hadn’t changed. They

same.

“No,” I told him truthfully. “I’m not afraid.”



“Then lets go up to my room,” he said. “I need to draw—well, really, what I need is a cigarett

m trying to quit. See, my doctor—Dr. Strong—he said when I feel like smoking, I should draw. H

awing’s an outlet for me—like smoking.”

“Oh.”

That’s completely reasonable , I told my feet. Still, I had a little trouble getting them to move. A

ok a great deal of doing to get them to follow Kyle up the stairs. When we got to his room, Kyle st

d turned to me.

“You know what? Can you wait here a minute?” He went inside his room and came back a

nutes later. “Okay, sorry about that. Come in.”

I entered his room, and then gaped in amazement. Every wall was plastered with drawings, eve

ling.

Kyle grinned, amused by my astonishment. “I need a cigarette a lot,” he said.

“Are you saving this part for something special?” I asked, gesturing to the area near his bed—theace on his wall that was empty.

“Uh, no. I had drawings there too. But I took them down. Just now—while you were waiting.”

Honesty. I couldn’t criticize that. But I figured I knew what kind of pictures he’d had there. I wa

touched that he took them down for me.

“You’re really talented,” I told him, gazing around the room.

“Thanks.”

He watched me as I looked around. When I noticed that, I reddened. “Do you remember me?”

Kyle shook his head slightly. “Lets see your pictures,” he said.

I sat beside him on his bed, opening the box. “You drew these.” I handed him his eight yea

awings one at a time. He studied them carefully, and I smiled. “Even back then you were an artist.”

He stared up at me, then ran his hands through his hair. “I really need a cigarette.”

“Draw,” I told him. “I don’t mind.”

He thought about it a moment, then shook his head. “Let’s see the rest of your pictures.”

I showed him our goofy photo booth pictures—the ones where we stuck out our tongues and

y faces. Then I showed him the pictures from our Sunday School class, the day we’d made neck

our moms for Mother’s Day. We had made the necklaces out of colored macaroni. I kept saying

etty the necklaces were, not knowing Kyle was secretly making an extra. He surprised me with iss, telling me I was his “angel.” That necklace was in the box too. I showed it to Kyle with a grin



He cocked his head. “You kept everything,” he said, staring at the necklace with wonder. He gla

ck at the picture of us making the necklaces. “Why were we all dressed up like that?”

In the picture, he was in a sweet little suit, with a tie and everything, and I was in my favorite

ess. “We were at church,” I said. “We dress nice for that.”

He gazed at me with interest. “We went to church? Both of us?”

I nodded. “Every Sunday,” I murmured. “When you were taken away our whole church praye

ur safe return. I prayed for you every night—even last night.”

Kyle stared at me a moment, his eyes fixated on mine. It seemed as though he was going t

mething important. He seemed to be negotiating it in his head, but then he seemed to decide agai

et’s see some more of your pictures.”

I showed him pictures of our eighth birthday party. We’d had it at my house and Nine had throw

ring musical chairs. When I pulled out a great action shot of that, Kyle’s poem fell to the floor. I h

cided if I was going to show him that or not. But suddenly he had it in his hands. He was read

hen he was done, he stared up at me.

“You were like … my girlfriend?” he asked.

I nodded, unable to speak.

“And you kept this stuff all this time?”

“Yes. Of course. Kyle, I loved you.” After I said that, I reddened. But I was glad I said it anyway

tter what kind of dork he might suddenly think I was, I had loved him. He had been good and kineet. I wanted him to know that.

He studied me a moment, and then asked, “We used to kiss?”

The question surprised me. “No. We were only eight.”

He drew his face near mine. “We’re not eight anymore,” he murmured. “Can I kiss you now?”

“Uh ….”

I knew there were reasons he couldn’t. Reasons it would be wrong. But at the moment I co

member them, not a single one. They were gone, out of my mind. All I could think about was his

nk lips, and what they would feel like pressed against mine.

Just as our lips met, I heard Mrs. Ryan return home. In that instant my mind whizzed back to life.

oyfriend. And Kyle was a criminal. These were the reasons. The reasons we couldn’t kiss.

I pushed Kyle away, rising to my feet. “I have to go,” I told him.

On shaky legs, I headed for the door.



“Wait. Don’t forget your box.” Kyle started collecting the pictures, but I hurried out of his room

wn the stairs too rattled to stop.

I could hear Kyle following after me, but still, I just kept going. I couldn’t stop. Not even when

an came out of the kitchen, surprised to find me running through her house.

“Rain? Is something the matter?” she asked.

“No,” I said, heading out of the front door. “I have to go.”

Kyle followed me out of the house.

“Here’s your box,” he said, not saying a word about the dork I was being. Still, I knew he must t

s a lunatic, the way I ran out of his house like that.

“Thanks,” I muttered, unable to meet his gaze. “I—I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay,” he said. “Thanks for bringing your stuff.” Then he added, “Sorry I scared you.”

I stared up at him in surprise. “You didn’t scare me.”

Actually, more than anything, I had scared myself. Why had I almost kissed him? What was the m

th me?



CHAPTER 6

“He’s back?” Chase looked confused as he got himself a glass of water from my fridge. He stiff

What do you mean, ‘ He’s back ?’”

I shrugged, trying to sound casual for some reason—as though this wasn’t the most spectacular m

t ever happened on the entire face of the planet. “Kyle came back.”

Chase took an abrupt seat at my kitchen table. He looked kind of … I don’t know—stunned? Anx

little of both, I guess. But he didn’t seem as pleased as I would have expected. I mean, we had allaid Kyle was dead.

“He’s back? Well, that’s great.” Chase gave an effort to smile. It didn’t exactly work, thoug

oked more like a grimace. “You really have to miss the game, though?—tonight? It’s the last o

ason. The last time you’ll ever see me play at Roosevelt high. Ever.”

I looked away, feeling guilty. When Mrs. Ryan told me about Kyle’s return I wasn’t thinking strai

sn’t thinking at all, really. I was too happy and excited. All I could think about was Kyle, and

ger I was to see him. So when Mrs. Ryan invited me to Kyle’s party, my mind wasn’t exactotball. But … I guess it should have been. At least a little. Tonight was the “Big Game.” The last

ason. And my boyfriend was the star of the team. Of course he wanted me out in the stands rootin

m.

Only, of course, that’s not really what he wanted. What he really wanted was it to be like last

en I was a cheerleader. I’d let him down big time when I quit the squad. But I couldn’t he

riously. I couldn’t endure another year of the squad’s backstabbing and snobbery. I couldn’t take

s bringing me down.

My quitting disappointed Chase, even more than he admitted. He loved the idea of his girlfriend

heerleader. It was like I was cheering for him alone or something. But the thing was, I couldn’t h

elt more comfortable cheering for him in the bleachers, far away from the cheerleaders. I know i

pposed to be a big deal or honor or whatever to be on the squad, but seriously … they weren’t nice

I played with the hem of my sweater, feeling rotten … and creep-like. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I gu

n’t have to go the party.”

But I wanted to. With all of my heart I wanted to. What if I didn’t show? What would Kyle thin

eady seemed worried I was afraid of him. If I didn’t come to his party, it might look to him as th



worries were right. That I was afraid of him. I couldn’t bear for him to think that. Or to let him t

dn’t care enough about him to come to his party.

Chase set his jaw. “I know you want to go. I’m not going to stop you.”

I took Chase’s hand, linking my fingers through his. “Don’t be mad, or hurt, please?”

He stared into my eyes. “You used to like him a lot, huh?”

“Well, yeah. But that was a long time ago.” I tried to reassure him, though it seemed strange that “We were just kids.”

Chase ran his hands through his hair. He didn’t seem convinced. “Yeah, but you talk about him a

me. I mean, even though it was years ago, it’s sort of like things aren’t resolved—at least for

ase studied me. “How did Kyle act when you saw him today?”

I shrugged. “I don’t think he even remembered me.”

That seemed to brighten Chase a little. “Really?” He got up from the table and wrapped hisund me. “I guess I’m the better boyfriend, then. I could never forget you.”

We went on to talk about other things (football) and everything seemed to be okay, like Chase

er his anxieties. But before he left for work, he seemed kind of concerned again. “I don’t have to w

out letting you go to this party alone tonight, do I?”

“Chase, of course not,” I told him with more assurance than I actually felt. “We were kids. It wa

ff.”

“Yeah, okay,” Chase murmured, sounding mollified, but then he went on, not sounding mollified

’s just that I know you. You’re a romantic. And suddenly your first boyfriend’s back—the guy yo

ntasized about for the last nine years.”

“I haven’t fantasized about him,” I protested.

“Yes you have. Mrs. Whitmore read that poem you wrote about him to the class sophomore

member?”

“It was just an assignment. I had to write about something.”

“Well, you didn’t write about me,” Chase pointed out.

I rumpled his hair. “We weren’t even together yet.”

Chase raised his eyebrows. “I wanted us to be together, though—even back then. The first day I

Roosevelt, I wanted us to be together.”

I nuzzled my face against his chest. He told me that all the time. He said he was awe-struck theoment he laid eyes on me. He was the romantic.



“Well, have fun tonight … I guess,” Chase said before leaving. I could tell he wanted me to chang

nd, go with him instead. It was sweet of him to not come right out and order it. (See, he wasn’

ntrolling. So there, Nine!)

“You have fun, too.” I kissed him. “Thanks for understanding.”

Chase hesitated. “Maybe you could just stop by at Kyle’s party—really quick. Say ‘hi’ and ‘wel

ck’ and all of that stuff—and then come to the game.” He looked into my eyes. “Rain, I really wan

be there.”

I sighed. “I’ll try.”

I walked him to the door, kicking myself for being a coward. I had planned to tell him abou

awings Kyle had given me, both drawings, the one he drew today in class, and the gorgeous one

mall. But how could I tell him? Chase was anxious enough as it was. I didn’t want to give him a

anything.

***

When I called Nine, she was ecstatic to hear of Kyle’s return, of course. But she was bummed th

sn’t invited to Kyle’s party. “I was Kyle’s friend, too,” she grumbled.

“It’s just a family thing,” I told her.

I could see her eyebrows rise from the other end of the phone. “And you’re family?”

“Well, I’ve been baby-sitting Cherri forever. And I baby-sat for Laurie all last summer.”

Laurie is Kyle’s oldest sister. She lives across town and has three kids. This summer she calle

nstantly to baby-sit, but now that I had my job at Pizza Haven I was usually too busy. Still, I like

ds a lot. In a way, I thought of them as my little brothers and sisters since I didn’t have any.

I went on, trying to placate Nine, “I was just an afterthought, anyway. I mean, Mrs. Ryan only in

today—and she seemed kind of weird about it.”

“Weird, how?” Nine asked.

I wasn’t sure how to answer. I couldn’t tell Nine about Kyle being involved in a holdup since

an asked me not to tell people. But having to keep that part from Nine made it hard to explain the r

“Uh … I don’t know,” I said evasively, then kinda tried to change the subject. “I guess she wa

cited about Kyle being back.”

“Did you tell Chase that Kyle used to be your boyfriend?” Nine asked. “Or that he gave you



awing?”

“No,” I sighed, plunging across my bed. “I mean, I told him about the Kyle-used-to-be-my-boy

rt. I told him about Kyle a long time ago—back when we first got together. But no, I didn’t te

out the drawing. I meant to, but … I couldn’t.”

“It’s so romantic,” Nine gushed, focusing on the mushy part of the story, and blowing off my tor

yle giving you that picture yesterday … and then it ending up being him.”

I smiled, despite the knot in my stomach. “Yeah. That is kind of cool, huh?”

All afternoon, I kept going over yesterday at the mall in my mind. Kyle had said I reminded h

meone he used to know. Was it me I reminded him of?



CHAPTER 7

When it was finally time for Kyle’s party, I literally skipped all the way to his house.

Mrs. Ryan answered the door. “You look beautiful,” she gushed, giving me a hug. “And you bro

okies! How thoughtful!”

She acted as though her dining room wasn’t overflowing with goodies—which it was and I knuld be. Mrs. Ryan wouldn’t dream of letting you leave her house without gaining a few extra po

d tonight she was celebrating the miraculous return of her only son. Her house was a feast-fest.

But I’d had hours and hours to kill before the party, and all I could do was think about Kyl

eded something brainless to occupy my time. (Though, I discovered baking cookies isn’t exac

ainless as I’d given it credit for. I almost burned down the house with my first batch.)

Besides, baking cookies is sort of my thing. When it’s someone’s birthday, I bake them cookies.

meone’s been kind to me, I bake them cookies. When someone’s been abducted for the last nine You get the point.

“Kyle,” Mrs. Ryan caught her son as he was hurrying by, “look what Rain brought you.”

He took a cookie … and my breath away, as his eyes gazed into mine. Breathe, I told myself. Br

eathe, breathe!

“Thanks,” he said.

I think he was going to say more, I’m pretty sure of it, but suddenly he was attacked by a heggling little boys.

“Surrender!” they shouted and Kyle wrestled them to the ground. “Never!”

He chased them into the other room.

Mrs. Ryan smiled after them. “They’re going to destroy my house,” she said, not sounding upset

fact, she sounded downright pleased.

I have to say, the Ryan’s party was a joy. It was wonderful seeing Kyle’s family so happy and gra



have him back. I think I was the only non-relative invited. Still, the house was packed. Kyle had a

atives and many of them had flown in to see their family’s miracle.

Kyle seemed, maybe, a little ill-at-ease. Maybe. Probably because there were so many people

y all seemed to want Kyle to remember them. I think he felt pressured. Still, he took it well. An

med to really enjoy all the little kids, his nieces and nephews. He spent most of the evening wre

th them.

Watching him with the kids touched me. He was so playful and good with them. It was sweet. Byou the truth, I was jealous. I wanted him to pay attention to me. Instead I spent most of the party

the couch between his two older sisters, Laurie and Emma, listening to them talk about their b

tty habits. (I take an oath here and now, when I have kids, I won’t talk about their dirty diapers. N

t especially not at parties.)

Finally, I decided to make a quick exit. I could still catch the end of Chase’s game if I hurried. Bu

s saying my good-byes, my heart sped up. I noticed Kyle making his way toward me, dodging ch

he came. “Do you want to come outside with me while I have a cigarette?” he asked confidentially

I nodded, honored that he’d specifically sought me out for the event, though I was sorry wh

vent” was.

“There’s too many names to remember,” he explained, “and I’d feel weird drawing in front of

quit smoking again tomorrow.”

Outside there was a cool breeze. I hugged myself, trying to get some warmth as we sat out on the

ps. “Does having your family all together bring back memories for you?”

Kyle shook his head. “Not really. My memory’s pretty screwed up. I can hardly even remember t happened a year ago.”

I didn’t really know what to say to that, so I didn’t say anything. I just gazed at him as he smok

arette, amazed that he was back.

“You used to be my wish,” I told him.

Kyle looked up at me with interest. “Pardon?”

“On a falling star, or a wishing well. Or a dandelion, or anything I could wish on—I always w

same thing—that you would come back.” I smiled wryly. “One year my parents put those trick ca

my birthday cake—you know, the kind you can’t blow out? When I wasn’t able to blow them

rted crying, and got all hysterical. I was afraid that because I wasn’t able to blow out all of my ca

y wish couldn’t come true. But, it did anyway.” I stared at him with wonder. “Here you are.”

Kyle gazed at me intently, then took a nervous drag on his cigarette. “You missed me, huh?”

“Yeah.” I laughed at the understatement. “I missed you a lot.” I turned to him, wanting hi

derstand just how much he had meant to me. “When I lost you, I lost my best friend. I mean that,



u were my best friend. I was miserable without you. I hated going to school without you ther

ying in my tree house alone. It was our tree house. I couldn’t even go up there without you.

ders in it. You used to kill them for me.”

“Did I?” Kyle smiled. “I was a good boyfriend, huh?”

“You were the best. I mean it. You really were. There was this boy—Charlie Braggs—he us

ways chase me at school. But you wouldn’t let him. You used to make him leave me alone. When

appeared I had to spend every recess in the bathroom because of stupid Charlie Braggs. I wways start crying while I was holed up in there, thinking that if you were still around you wouldn

arlie be mean to me.”

I stared up at him. “That’s how I was about everything. Whenever anything went wrong in my lif

ways think, ‘This wouldn’t be happening if Kyle was here.’”

Kyle gazed at me thoughtfully, then down at his cigarette.

My heart went out to him. Here I was talking about all my petty problems. Poor Kyle! “I’m

ful things happened to you,” I said softly, wanting to run my fingers through his hair. He lookemn. I wanted to do something comforting—something to take away his pain.

“It wasn’t that bad.” He gazed out into the darkness of the night. “I survived.”

I bit my lip, longing to ask the question I could tell he didn’t want to answer. “Will you tell me ab

metime—what happened to you?”

He flinched. Then set his jaw. He was silent a long time and I thought he wasn’t going to answe

n he said, “There’s a lot I can’t tell you. I want to, but I can’t.” He looked into my eyes, makinlt into a puddle. “I’ll tell you everything I can, though. I swear, everything. I want us to be close,

like we used to be.”

Hearing him say that, his voice so tender and full of longing, did strange, painful things to my he

nt that too.”

***

By the time I got home, it was too late to go to Chase’s game but I knew I wouldn’t be able to sl

s too wound up to even think about sleep—Kyle was back! He was home safe. I’d actually sa

ked with him. It was like a miracle!

No way could I sleep.

So, I knew what I had to do. I opened my laptop, needing to write about my miracle. I had to



out it, or I’d explode. I was tempted to log onto my public blog and write about my miracle there,

ogged about Kyle on it all the time. I wanted the world to know my joy—that Kyle had come hom

was safe. But I didn’t open my blog, no way. Instead, I logged onto my old-fashioned, just-fo

vate-viewing journal.

But once I logged on to my email account, an involuntary whimper escaped my lips. Immediat

s shaking and couldn’t stop. There was another creepy email addressed to me. I’d gotten them

ely—well, I had been getting them lately. So, I shut down my blog and they stopped … for a whil

eemed they were going to start again. Please no, Please no, Please no!

The creepy messages first started when I began posting my blog. In the beginning, I only posted

a schoolwork assignment. We had to blog about something we “truly believed.” So, I’d blogged

d. At first I only posted once a week, as that was the assignment. But then, I started getting in

sting almost everyday. I could relate almost every aspect of my life back to Heavenly Father—ev

y little sister, Grace, who died in the hospital when she was only three weeks old. I wrote about

ateful I was knowing Heavenly Father was up in heaven holding sweet, tiny Grace in his arms, so

have his little daughter home. It gave me such comfort knowing that, I wanted to share it with the w

wanted to share all of my testimony with the world.

But my blog was controversial, I guess. I hadn’t meant it to be, not at all. To me it was just a w

are my testimony and insights about God, if anyone cared. I didn’t really think about who was re

Or why. I just wrote and wrote and wrote, because it felt good to write. But then, I started g

gry, hateful e-mails—all from the same person, from a guy—he called himself “Stan.” At first h

uted my scripture references, refuted the fact there was a God, ranting that the world was evil

re was a God he would destroy it. But then, the guy started ranting that I was evil. And that I need

stopped. So, you bet, I stopped. I stopped posting my blog, like immediately, totally freaked ou

rified. But the emails kept coming. It took a long time for them to stop.

Only now, as I sat whimpering and shaking, I realized they hadn’t stopped. They had just ta

all break. This new message was just as creepy, just as twisted as all the others. In horror, I

ain, we’re going to get you.”



CHAPTER 8

The next morning, Kyle didn’t come to church with the rest of his family. I was sorry to see tha

art ached. That’s how strong my disappointment was.

During church, when Pastor Woodland publicized Kyle’s safe return, the whole congreg

urmured with delight. No one could contain themselves. I glanced across the chapel to Chase. He

a cheerful smile.

After the meeting, it was hard to reach Mrs. Ryan. She was mobbed with well-wishers. Whe

wd finally subsided, I asked, “Does Kyle need a ride to youth group in the morning?”

Mrs. Ryan’s glow dimmed a little. “That’s sweet of you, Rain. But … I don’t think Kyle will be

youth group. At least not right away.”

“Oh.”

Again, I was sorely disappointed. But, of course, I could understand, totally understand. Kyl

ent the last nine years away from his family, away from good influences. He couldn’t be expect

ve a testimony of God, not after all the horrible, evil things he had gone through. But still, I wish

uld have come—felt the wonderful spirit and known that he was loved.

Mrs. Ryan seemed to read my thoughts. “Dr. Strong told us to be patient with Kyle. My son has

his own a long time, been through traumatic experiences. Dr. Strong said we should be an exa

ow our love, but not push.”

I nodded, getting it. “I won’t push,” I promised. Only, I knew that would be hard for me. When

meone needing help, a little nudge, I can’t help it, I push.

***

After church, as I was eating my Coca-Puffs I saw Kyle out washing his car. I quickly downewl, then wandered over to him.



“Hi,” I said, curiously shy.

“Hi.” The way he smiled at me made my heart do flip-flops.

I seem to have a crush on Kyle, I realized with alarm. I would have run home right then and c

ase, invited him over for lunch. Only Chase and his family were going to his grandparent’s hou

day.

Besides, I couldn’t just run off. Not when Kyle looked so happy to see me. That wouldn’t be p

uld it?

“When you’re finished with your car do you want to go on a field trip?” I asked.

Kyle grinned, cocking his head slightly. He looked intrigued. “A field trip?”

I nodded.

“I guess I’m done now.” Kyle studied me. “Sure. I’ll go on a field trip.”

I had him walk with me to our old elementary school. I tried to make him conjure up a memory

st. Something about the school, or anything, but he wouldn’t even try.

“Look Rain,” he glanced at me as we swayed sideways towards each other on the playground sw

don’t like to think about the past. I mean, I can’t be selective about what I remember or I’d try

at you’re asking. The thing is, though, I just want to forget the past. I mean, it would be nice to kee

rt from home and forget the rest, but … I’m not able to choose, you know?”

I stared at him a moment, understanding what he was saying—he was saying his past was too ho

risk having to remember—at least the part where he was taken away. Mrs. Ryan told me about tha

eady known she wasn’t his real mom. She had been his foster mom, and then later adopted him.

d lived in her home though since he was two—even before he was two. His biological parents

ssed up—his mom was an alcoholic and his father was confined to a mental institution. His fathe

chizophrenic. He heard voices. Scary voices. Voices that told him to do scary things. That’s wh

ological mom stole him from the Ryan’s. When Kyle was eight, she abducted him, thinking his

uld escape from the hospital, that he would kill Kyle—I guess he had said he was going to, sa

eded to, the voices told him he had to.

“Kyle,” I said hesitantly, “you told me that you’d tell me about your past, what happened whil

re away and everything.”

“Yeah,” he looked at me thoughtfully. “I did. And I will. But, not here, okay? I can’t talk about

re.”

We climbed up to our old tree house. It was in pretty good shape. Cherri used it a lot. She k

an. She obviously wasn’t afraid of spiders.



After getting situated, Kyle couldn’t put it off any longer. “Okay, I’ll tell you now,” he said. “Bu

ve to have a cigarette to get through it.”

I wasn’t sure what to say to that. So I didn’t say anything.

“I can’t tell you everything, okay?” he explained as he lit up a cigarette. “I mean, there’s a lot of

n’t remember—not just because I have a memory block, like Dr. Strong says. But something happ

mething bad. And I can’t tell you.” He took a ragged drag on his cigarette, running his hands throug

r. “But I’ll tell you everything I can. Only, some stuff I don’t think you could understand—I meand. I’ll tell you everything I think you can stomach though, okay?”

I bit my lip, not really understanding what he was talking about, but already feeling sorry for h

ry for the agonies I knew he must have gone through, the pain he must have endured. “Whateve

nt to tell me.”

“Well, like I told the police, and Dr. Strong, and everyone, I don’t remember when my mom took

when I first started living with her and her psycho boyfriend, Roger, or anything like that.” Kyl

lip. “All I remember was living with her and Roger.”

“No one knew it was your mom that took you. We thought you were dead.”

Kyle eyed me kind of funny. He took a ragged breath. “Yeah, she wanted it to look like that. Be

e was afraid my dad was going to come after me—try to kill me.”

I bit my lip, wanting to run my fingers through his hair again, wanting to do something comfort

t so bad for him.

Kyle was silent for a long time. “Mom didn’t let me go to school, she was afraid to let me out ht. But there were no kids around, I didn’t have any friends. There weren’t any other houses ar

her. It was more of a commercial type district we were living in—mostly business establishment

t even a lot of those. There wasn’t much of anything around. Anyway, Mom taught me at home. Sh

good teacher, I think. Actually, she was a good person—I mean, really nice, you know? But, she

k. Her mind was really messed up. Sometimes—” Kyle took a long drag on his cigarette and look

ough his thoughts were far off. It was a long time before he spoke again, and when he finally d

dn’t finish whatever he was going to tell me. Instead, he truncated it, made it more bearable, “My

s sick in the head. Roger said she had a really bad childhood. He said that’s why she was so m

”

I wondered what kind of things his mom did, but I could sense Kyle had avoided telling m

rpose, so I knew it was better not to ask. But just realizing he didn’t want me to know gave m

tainty they were things no little kid should have to endure.

Wishing there was someway I could take away the past, I snuggled up beside him, resting my he

chest. It wasn’t something I would normally do, not with anyone but Chase, but it wasn’t a rom

ng. It was a comfort thing. And I felt close to Kyle—almost as close as I felt to Chase—jus

ferent way.



Kyle put an arm around me, keeping the other free so he could smoke. “We lived in an old h

hind this auto repair garage that Roger owned. I guess the shop was a dump, but … I don’t know,

liked it. Roger had me work with him out there. He taught me everything he knew about cars—w

s a pretty lot, actually. But the thing about Roger was he drank … a lot, and when he got drunk he

t of control. He beat me up when he was drunk—bad.”

Kyle bit his lip. “Is this kind of boring you?” he asked after a moment. “Do you want to do some

e?”

“No, I want you to go on.”

He took a long, shaky drag on his cigarette, staying silent. It was a long time before he continued

d came,” Kyle said flatly. He said it without emotion, his eyes looking far off, as though s

mething far away, or maybe he was trying to distance himself from the story. I think that was it, be

next thing he said was, “He came looking for me, to kill me, but he killed … my mom, stabbed

ath.”

A tear ran down his cheek, breaking my heart, making me bawl, but Kyle shoved the tear away,

with his story in total monotone. “So, my dad killed my mom, and then it was just Roger and me

nds shaking slightly, Kyle took another ragged drag on his cigarette “Roger hated me then— hated

said it was my fault—he was always saying that, saying ‘ It should have been you,’ saying ‘Why

me back ?’”

I blinked, looking up at him. “Come back from where? The hospital? Did you get hurt, too?”

Kyle looked away. “Yeah, I got hurt too. Only I came back from the hospital, but my mom d

ger couldn’t get over that. He started to get drunk constantly, all the time, and he would beat me up

rse—I mean, using tools and stuff. He didn’t want me there, and I never wanted to be there, so w

s thirteen I left. I hitched rides to New York City.” He took another long drag on his cigarette b

ng on. “It was only three hours away. A bad thing though was I only had about ten bucks in my po

d I was afraid to spend it. I figured I might need it—in case of an emergency or something.

“When I first got there, for like a week, I slept on the streets, and stole food from this conven

re—I think the guy knew I was stealing, but he let me—I guess he felt sorry for me. I mean, I w

at up, and hadn’t showered or anything. But then, after a while, I met some guys that were runaway

ey showed me ways I could make money, but then I started getting messed up on drugs, and … s

ing whatever I had to, to get more. After a while, I don’t know how long—maybe a couple mo

ybe longer, I don’t know—I got caught and put in juvenile hall.”

“What was it you got caught doing?” I asked when I could see he wasn’t going to voluntee

ormation.

Kyle looked at me thoughtfully, biting his lower lip as he seemed to be pondering what to tell m

doesn’t matter, does it? I mean, the point is, I got caught doing something illegal. I didn’t kill any

anything though.”



“Did you rob somebody?”

He bit his lip again, seeming uncomfortable. “I’d robbed people before, but … that’s not what

ught doing. Look … Rain, there’s parts of my past I can’t tell you—I don’t want you to think of m

t.”

“Okay.” I understood how he felt, so I didn’t push it. But I wanted him to feel he could te

ything. “So, what happened while you were in juvenile hall?”

“I was assigned a substance abuse therapist. Her name was Joyce Baker. She helped get me out o

l and into a substance abuse hospital. While I was there I did a lot of drawing and Joyce saw my

e was an artist too. When I was ready to be released from the hospital she had me move in with he

“Oh really?” I smiled, pleased that he’d met such a caring woman, and that she’d taken su

erest in him. I was glad someone had.

“Yeah. She was really nice. She told everyone I was her nephew. Everyone seemed to believ

o, except her ex-husband—he didn’t of course. He was a cool guy though, and didn’t make a big

out it. He was a surgeon, and remarried, but I think he still kind of loved Joyce—I think she still

m too. They had a weird relationship, but I think for the most part they were friends.” Kyle grinned

d her major bucks in alimony though. He wasn’t too happy about that.

“Anyway, Joyce helped me work on my drawing. And she didn’t make me go to school, either

dn’t know how to get me enrolled without the school finding out about my past, and that I wasn’t r

her.”

“Did she know about your past?”

“Yeah…. I told her as much as I knew—which really wasn’t that much. Anyway, she didn’t sen

school, but she was really big on education. She wanted me to become a surgeon, or som

pressive like that. Actually, she wanted me to be like her ex-husband, but he was a cool guy, so I d

lly mind…. She had me read books, and she taught me French … sort of.

“She was planning on having me get my GED and starting college as soon as I turned sixteen, bu

e got sick.”

“Oh.” I didn’t like the sound of that. I had the feeling the story of Joyce didn’t have a happy endin

“She found out she had breast cancer. They gave her treatments for it, and at first it seemed th

rked, but it ended up they didn’t. The cancer had spread all through her body. They gave her treatm

ain, stronger ones this time. They made her really sick. Actually, it was the treatments that killed h

y were really strong. But, she was going to die anyway … the treatments just made her die faster.”

“How horrible for you,” I said sympathetically. It must have been really hard for him to watch th

rson that had ever been nice to him die before his eyes.

“Yeah?” he laughed, sounding kind of bitter. “Was that horrible for me? She died; I lived. T



sn’t anything I could do for her when she was dying. They wouldn’t let her come home to die

nted to, and I tried to make them, but … they wouldn’t let her. They didn’t trust me to take care of

He was almost crying when he said that. I put my arms around him, running my fingers throug

r. For an anxious moment it seemed as though he was going to kiss me—he made a move as thou

s going to—but he didn’t. He took a long, nervous drag on his cigarette instead. “After she d

oved in with this girl I met, Lynn. She was a dancer at a club. She had this witch of a roommate th

mber. She was abnormally upset when I moved in. But then I got a job working on cars, and she w

bad after that. I guess because I was bringing in some money. That was working out okay, actualt then Lynn got pregnant, and right after that, I got laid off. Lynn couldn’t work because she was

k, and besides, she was going to start showing pretty soon. Then she would’ve had to quit anyw

le was quiet for a moment, taking a break from his story to smoke on his cigarette.

“Anyway, we needed money to pay the rent and eat, and there were going to be doctor bills. F

mber’s boyfriend, had this great idea to rob a convenience store. It sounded stupid to me, but we

etty desperate—I mean, we had no cash, and the girls owed money, and I was getting worried

nn—about the baby. And since I couldn’t come up with anything better, we got a gun.” Kyle shoo

ad, giving a low bitter laugh. “Man, we were so stupid.

“The first time we did it things went pretty well. We got some money, not a lot, but enough to ho

er for a while. Things didn’t go so well the next time, though. The guy working behind the counter

his gun, and Frank shot him. I couldn’t believe he did that. He grabbed the money out of the re

d ran. I was the driver. I’d been waiting in the car, but I couldn’t just let the guy bleed to death. I

ide and called an ambulance. The police came while I was trying to stop his bleeding. The guy

didn’t want to press charges, since I saved him and everything, but the store had this policy

ways prosecuting. Anyway, I got put in jail. While I was there, though, Joyce’s ex posted bail. I ha

a how he found out about it. He wasn’t the phone call I made or anything.”

“What happened to the girl you were living with?”

“Lynn? She lost the baby.… And she ran off with some guy.”

“I’m sorry.” He must have really loved her to live with her and everything.

“Yeah …” he said absently, lost in his own thoughts. “Anyway, Joyce’s ex-husband posted bail.

had me stay at his house. He was extremely rich. His house was like a mansion, and his wife lo

e a model. She was really nice too…. He got the store to drop the charges, and told the police I’dducted as a child. I have no idea how he knew that either—I guess Joyce must’ve told him. Anyw

uple days later the guy tells me that my family had been found and that they were anxious to g

ck, and here I am.”



CHAPTER 9

After talking with Kyle out in the tree house, I felt incredibly close to him, as though there w

ecial bond between us, as though we were brother and sister. Maybe I felt more than that, but I re

contemplate any sort of non-sibling type feelings. After all, I had Chase, perfect Chase, and

oked and lived a far different sort of lifestyle than one I’d be comfortable getting involved

mantically, I mean. We could never date, ever. Even if he wanted to … which of course he d

viously. ‘Cause, you know, he had laughed about the idea in the mall.

With these thoughts firmly planted in my mind, I didn’t feel guilty at all about getting close to K

t felt he needed me. After all, he hadn’t been to school in nine years (except for Friday—wh

ended exactly one class before deciding to go home). He obviously felt uncomfortable about

ck.

My concerns for him only grew when I got a phone call from Mrs. Ryan. She said Kyle had

ted a few weeks ago and found to be well above average academically. “But I’m worried abou

ing in,” she said. “He seems nervous about going to school.”

So I promised her I would watch out for Kyle. And I had every intention of keeping that prom

ured I could show him around campus, and walk him to his classes and basically be there for h

y way I possibly could.

Monday morning, right after Youth Group, I looked for Kyle everywhere. But Roosevelt’s

hool; it’s hard to find people in the crowded halls. Secretly, I worried he wouldn’t show. I cou

lly picture him at school, roaming the halls, carrying books, and doing the normal student stuff.

sn’t able to conjure up the image. Kyle seemed older, and more likely to be seen on a magazine vertising men’s cologne than here at school with everyday, ordinary teenagers, doing ordinary tee

ngs.

So when Kyle showed up in my second period class, American Lit, I was more than a little surp

see him.

“This is Kyle Ryan,” Mrs. Walker announced to the class. If she was aware Kyle hadn’t been ins

ssroom in the last nine years she kept it to herself. Instead, she had him sit in the row directly a

room from me, three seats back.



I glanced over at Nine and she smiled smugly. “Wipe the drool off your chin,” she whispered.

I rolled my eyes, but it was hard to keep from staring at Kyle. Not that I was interested in h

ything more than a brother. But geez , I realized with discomfort, my brother is sure nice to loo

ll, I made a concerted effort not to stare. I didn’t look up from my notes all through class, not until

alker stopped abruptly in the middle of her lecture. “Is there something you all want to share with u

I glanced up to see who she was talking to, and was startled to realize it was a gaggle of kids gaw

Kyle’s paper, his notes. They were doing it from their seats, but not very quietly; they were whispe

Mrs. Walker was stern, definitely not a teacher I would want to upset or even draw attention fro

was immediately worried for Kyle. What was he doing? Why did everyone around him care?

alker eyed him with curiosity, “Mr. Ryan, is that something you would like to share with the

ss?”

Kyle wet his lips, then shook his head, no; but Mrs. Walker was already headed to his desk. She g

wn at Kyle’s work and let out a breath. “Very nice,” she said admiringly.

She picked up his paper, studying it, and, of course, I figured I knew what it was. Kyle was dra

ain. Was he ever going to actually take notes in a class? It didn’t seem like it.

“You’re very talented,” Mrs. Walker said, in no way sounding sarcastic, in fact, sounding impre

wever, when she went on talking, it was in her stern-teacher voice, so I was a little worried for

ain. “But this isn’t art class, Mr. Ryan, and you’re starting our semester a little late. Perhaps you sh

ay to the angels, rather than draw them.”

With that said, she marched toward her desk with his paper, but then seemed to rethink her pla

y astonishment, she turned mid-stride, now marching toward me. I held my breath, my heart poundie placed Kyle’s work on my desk.

“Apparently, Mr. Ryan thinks highly of you,” she said, then went on with her lecture as tho

dn’t been disturbed.

A wave of tingles washed over me as I stared down at the paper Mrs. Walker had placed on my

le’s paper. My heart sped up, throttled into over-drive, pounding so hard I thought it was goi

unce right out of my chest. What had Kyle been working on? Another drawing … of me. Again,

gel. What was it about him and angels?

Tingles ran up and down my body as I glanced across the room to find Kyle gazing at me. The w

red did funny things to my already out of control heart. I had to look away.

Toward the end of class, Nine plopped a note on my desk as she breezed by me to sharpen her p

e note made me groan. It said, “Sample the flavors, Rain!”

On her way back, she flung another note at me, this one backhanded, landing in my lap. “Venture

nilla!”



Ugh! Quickly, I scribbled, Chase is so not vanilla! Chase is chocolate—with sprinkles.

After class, I timidly brought the drawing over to Kyle. “Do you want this back?”

“No. That’s okay,” he said, gathering up his books. “You can have it—if you want it.”

“Of course I want it,” I told him. “It’s beautiful.” Then I gave a nervous laugh ’cause that didn’t

t the way I’d meant. The drawing was of me; I didn’t mean to call myself beautiful. Feeling like a

uickly changed the subject. “How are your classes going?”

He shrugged, biting off a grin. “They’re giving me a lot of inspiration to draw.”

I planned on walking him to his next class, watching out for him as I’d promised Mrs. Ryan. B

le and I walked out of class together, Misty Saunders was waiting for him just outside the door.

She smiled and took his hand. “How’d it go?” she asked.

With a sunny smirk, he shrugged. “Survived.”

He glanced back at me as Misty led him to his next class. He smiled, his eyes warm and tender,

u later, Rain.”

Watching him walk away with Misty made my heart sink. It wasn’t that I had designs on h

ything. I didn’t. Really. But I wanted him to meet a nice girl, one that would be a good influence on

meone like Nine. Not Misty Saunders. Still, he seemed to be making friends and fitting in. I wa

out that … I guess.

***

At lunch, as we walked to the cafeteria, Nine couldn’t stop gushing about Kyle drawing me in

’s so romantic,” she cooed.

“Stop saying that,” I said in exasperation. “The guy likes to draw. It’s his life. He draws anythin

es.”

“My point exactly!” Nine exclaimed with a triumphant smile. “He had a whole classroom full o

choose from, but he only had eyes for you.”

I groaned. “Nine, we’re good friends, that’s it. Besides, I hate to break it to you, but he left

lding hands with Misty Saunders.”

Nine made a face. “Misty Saunders?”

Once we got to the cafeteria Chase was waiting for me, looking grim. “Let’s see the picture,” he



I hadn’t told him about it. Actually, I hadn’t seen him since Youth Group this morning. But I w

prised that he knew. Word travels fast at our school, especially when it’s stuff like a guy getting c

awing the quarterback’s girlfriend—I was surprised he hadn’t heard about Kyle’s picture from Fri

Chase took the drawing from my backpack, and sat down, studying it. His eyebrows furrowed d

d deeper as he scrutinized every detail. I didn’t blame him for paling. The drawing was extre

ttering. Kyle had sketched me as though I was a beautiful goddess.

I watched Chase in silence, uncertain how to reassure him, how to explain to him that Kyle and Iecial brother-sister type bond. That our relationship wasn’t as the drawing made it appear—it w

sed on romance, but a deep, special kinship—one that I cherished, one that I hoped would grow,

sn’t a threat to what Chase and I had, not at all. It was completely different.

How could I possibly communicate all of this to Chase, though? How could I possibly mak

derstand? I didn’t have a clue.

Nine was silent as well, seeming to hold her breath, waiting for Chase to explode. Only he

plode. Instead, he handed me the picture back, calmly saying, “I hate that guy.” Then he escorted

lunch line.



CHAPTER 10

“You know how we were going to take Lexie to bingo at her school tonight?” Chase said wh

led Friday.

“Yeah,” I answered suspiciously. It sounded as though he was going to back out.

Since football season ended last week, I’d thought I’d see more of Chase, not less. But he’d sudcome a workaholic. Or rather, his dad turned him into one. Mr. Michaels owned a print shop and

t Chase finished football for the season, he had Chase building up his college fund.

Actually, business at the shop was booming. I knew that, and I understood. But Lexie was Ch

ven-year-old sister and I got the feeling she’d wanted to show Chase off to her friends at bingo ton

lso had the feeling she was going to be sorely disappointed to be stuck with just me. After all, I w

g and handsome, I didn’t make her friends blush, and I doubted they’d get too excited if I flirted

m.

“Do you think you could take her alone?” Chase asked.

I sighed, dramatically, since I already knew this was coming.

“I suppose,” I said, making it sound as though it was a bigger chore than it actually was. I happ

e bingo, a lot. Winning is cool. And I was glad to be helping Chase out—but I figured I might as

some Good Girlfriend Points for it.

“Thanks,” he said. Then I heard a grin in his voice. “Don’t even think you’re fooling me, th

u’re probably glad I’m not coming—one less person to keep you from getting bingo.”

Drat! He knew me too well.

I grinned. “Yeah. Now I just need to get rid of Lexie and her friends.”

When Lexie and I got to the gym at her elementary school, the place was packed. Hailey Ha

xie’s best friend, was waiting for us at the door. The first words out of her mouth were, “Wh

ase?”

Lexie rolled her eyes. “He had to work.”



Hailey sort of glared at me. No joke. The little twerp had a crush on Chase and she wasn’t shy

ting me know I was an obstacle she was ready to hurdle to get to her man.

“Can you still spend the night?” Hailey whispered to Lexie as though I might forbid it, as though

d a say in who Lexie could and couldn’t spend the night with.

Lexie shrugged, scanning the gym. “Sure. My sleeping bag’s out in Rain’s car. Where should we

They scoped out the crowded gym. Then Lexie exclaimed, “Oh, there’s Cherri—and she’s wit

other!”

That made Hailey (and me) snap to attention. “Where?”

The girls practically ran to Kyle’s table, which wasn’t a bad idea since there weren’t many open

t. But I kind of held back, worried that Chase would be upset when he learned we sat with

wever, I shrugged off my anxieties. I had nothing to feel guilty about. Kyle was my friend. Chase w

ve to deal with it.

I quickened my pace. My heart suddenly warmed ’cause when Kyle saw me, his eyes lit up. I

ne did every time I saw him, too. I was still amazed that he was back. It never failed, whene

anced to see him, I had to resist the urge to run up and throw my arms around him and hug him

ht, tight and gush on and on and on (and on and on) about how incredibly thrilled I was that h

ck.

I resisted the urge now with strained effort. Instead, I grumbled teasingly, “How am I supposed t

th all of these people here?”

I had to physically scoot Hailey over so I could sit across from Kyle. Not an easy feat to accom

d still look “breezy.” The runt wouldn’t budge. But I was bigger and stronger … and more determi

When I’d finally managed to nudge my way into the coveted seat, I almost stuck my tongue out a

ly, I didn’t ’cause I knew how she felt. I wanted to be close to Kyle too. Besides, I was still wo

“breezy.”

Although I’m usually good at bingo—able to work a bunch of cards at once—tonight I couldn’t

l I wanted to do was talk with Kyle. The whole week had gone by without us hardly getting to vIt had been frustrating! But suddenly here he was, sitting right across from me. It was an unexp

at I couldn’t resist.

But it was so FRUSTRATING! Every time I tried to talk—just a little—I’d get shushed. The girl

ing me that, “shush,” and complaining that they couldn’t hear the numbers. But I couldn’t “shush.”

Kyle was sitting right across from me, and I’d hardly gotten to talk to him all week, and beside

rm, tender, brown eyes kept lingering on mine. How could I possibly “shush?” It was like punish

ture.

I wanted to find out how his week had gone. How did he like his classes? Was it hard to be ba



hool?

But Hailey grumbled loudly, “Geez, can you two save your flirting for intermission?”

I would have denied any “flirting” going on, but apparently, right then B-4 was called and Lexie

p on one of my cards, exclaiming, “Rain, you have bingo!”

I widened my eyes. “I do? I do! Bingo!” I shouted, rising to my feet. “Bingo! Bingo!”

I love to win!

I shot up and ran to the front of the gym to choose my basket of goodies. But by now, all of the

od baskets were already taken. Still, there were plenty that caught my eye. Most of them involved

assed up a basket of chocolates. Mmmm, let me tell you, it was tempting. But Hailey’s “flirting”

d me feeling guilty about Chase. There he was, off at work, slaving at his dad’s shop, and I was h

ill-attacks, yakking it up with Kyle. He needed a … something.

I chose a big basket full of nuts, since Chase is kind of nuts about nuts. (Ha!)

Passing up chocolates for nuts—see, that’s love.

When I sat down, I was still beaming. “I won!” I exclaimed to Kyle.

He grinned at me as though I was an amusing kid, his eyes dancing with humor. “And you chose n

“Oh. Yeah.” I reddened for some reason. “They’re for Chase.”

Lexie rolled her eyes. “I should have known.”

When bingo was over I reluctantly said goodbye to Kyle. It was hard to leave him these days, e

ways had the strange, unsettling fear he’d disappear again. But of course, we had to part—alw

cause, well, because that was life. It was full of unsavory things I didn’t want to do, like dishe

mework … and saying good-bye.

Lexie, Hailey and I started out to my car and the girls were chattering about the brownies

ocolate frosting waiting for them at home.

“Mmmm! Brownies,” I cooed. “I’m going to make some the min—”

Someone—or something—was in the shadows. I saw it move! A whimper escaped my lips

ze, my chest winding tight.

I narrowed my eyes, my heart racing as I peered out into the dark parking lot. I couldn’t actual

ything, but now I felt as though we were being watched.

Lexie tugged on my arm impatiently, trying to pull me along. “Come on Rain! What are you d

t’s go.”



I bit my lip, unable to move. The emails and scary gifts I’d been getting loomed in my min

eats, I’m coming for you. I couldn’t move.

Kyle was suddenly at my side, seeming to come from nowhere. He put a gentle hand on my shou

ain, do you want me to walk you out to your car?”

He said it with concern, as though he was worried for me, as though he knew I was afraid. His t

s uncanny. I smiled, comforted by the gesture and by his very presence. Suddenly, I felt safe. “Y

like that, thanks. We parked way out there—in the dark.”

When we got to my car, Kyle lingered beside me. “Cherri and I are going to get ice-cream,” he

o you want to come?”

Okay, I have to admit, I was m-a-j-o-r-l-y tempted. But I knew I wouldn’t like it if Chase went o

cream with a girl—a cute one, even if they were just friends. It was too much like a date.

“I better not. It’s—uh, getting late,” I said, though it was barely eight.

“Oh, please come!” Cherri urged. “He’s taking me out to cheer me up. I didn’t get the part I wantr school play.” She made a sad puppy-dog face.

I laughed, kind of touched that she wanted me to come. I thought she would want Kyle all to h

t I used to baby-sit her, like constantly. I guess she missed me. That was nice.

I sighed. “Okay … I guess.” After all, it wasn’t as though it would be just Kyle and me, just the t

—alone.

And it was for Cherri.

Besides, I missed out on chocolate tonight getting Chase his big basket of nuts. I deserved ice cre

I dropped Lexie off at Hailey’s house and then Kyle and Cherri picked me up at mine. I was glad

re following me, glad I was going out with them. Just looking at my dark, empty house made me s

ouldn’t quite shake the feeling I’d had in the school parking lot, that I was being watched. I felt it

onger now as I stared up at my house. It was eerie, though probably nothing, just Stan’s e

ooking me out.

“Your parents gone?” Kyle asked, opening his car door for me.

I nodded. “They’re in Vermont. My dad does a lot of work there, and my mom likes to go with

en she can.”

Sometimes I liked having the house to myself—but not lately. Not since the scary emails started.

was a big chicken.

We bought our ice creams at 31 Flavors and then drove up to the cliffs near our house to eat them

w was awesome. Stars above us, city below.



“Let’s tell stories,” Cherri suggested, snuggling between Kyle and me. “I’ll start.”

She told a story about a girl named Sherry who tried out for her school play, The Wizard o

herry had the part of the Wicked Witch down perfect,” Cherri said. “She could cackle ‘I’ll get yo

etty and your little dog too!’ and leave everyone in goose bumps. She was made to be the witch.

“But then Mrs. Schmitt, the drama teacher, was cheap and didn’t want to pay for a costume to

eet Sherry look mean and evil, so she picked Beth to be the witch instead. Because Beth looks

tch. But, see, that’s discrimination. You can’t discriminate against a person just because thautiful. So Sherry sued Mrs. Schmitt and won a million dollars. And then she went on to pla

cked Witch in the remake of the movie, The Wizard of Oz . And then she played in a bunch of

ovies, too. And she became super famous and won a bunch of Oscars. The end.”

Kyle and I looked at each other, trying to hold back laughter.

“That was a great story, Cherri,” Kyle said, rumpling her hair. “And you were a great Wicked W

u should have gotten the part.”

Cherri slumped down in the seat, finishing her ice cream. “I know.”

We were all silent for a moment, enjoying the twinkling stars. It was nice. And I thought it

redibly sweet of Kyle to spend his Friday night cheering up his little sister rather than going ou

sty or any of the other stoner-girls I saw him with at school.

“Okay,” Cherri said. “Your turn, Kyle.”

“To tell a story?” He seemed hesitant. But then he went on to tell a super, super cute story about

med Sherry who didn’t get the part she wanted in her school play, but ended up saving Mrs. Schmith and the whole Wizard of Oz cast from a hilarious flying-monkeys invasion.

Cherri giggled through the whole crazy tale, making him go on and on.

I loved hearing Kyle’s story—hearing him tell it. I could have listened to him all night, jus

erri. I loved his husky voice, and the way I could tell he was smiling during parts, even though i

o dark to see his face. I could hear his smile in his voice. I loved that.

“That was good !” Cherri gushed when Kyle had finished his exciting tale. “You should make thabook. All of my friends would buy it. And, hey, you could do your own illustrations! You’d ma

tune!”

Cherri rested her head contentedly on Kyle’s shoulder. “Okay, Rain, your turn.”

“Oh, uh …”

I had to think. There seemed to be a “Sherry” theme going, but there was no story starring Sherry

ad. In fact, there was no story at all. I’d been too caught up in Kyle’s tale to think about mine.



“Well … hmmm.”

Feeling lame, I finally went on, though I still couldn’t think of anything. “This is a true story. Ab

racle.”

I told about Kyle when he was a little boy, about how sweet and good he was, how incredibly sp

e used to kill spiders for me,” I told Cherri. “And he would always save me from this mean

arlie Braggs. And he used to draw me pictures and write me poems, and walk me to my piano less

Kyle had been my bright, shining angel , I told Cherri, only not exactly in those words, but tha

gist. I turned to Kyle. “Having you back—it’s a miracle.”

Kyle stared at me, not saying anything. Finally, he gave a sad, wry smile. “You kind of liked me

was a kid, huh?”

I grinned. “You think?”

I might have overstressed that—how much I’d adored him, but I wanted him to know how wond

was, how special … only for some reason it seemed to fill his eyes with pain. He looked away.ould probably get home.”

The short ride to my house was quiet. Cherri was busy playing with a game device and Kyle

ently at the road ahead. I twisted my ring round and round my finger. We’d been having so much

d Kyle had seemed so happy … until my story. Now he was all sad and somber. It made my heart a

As he drove, Kyle noticed me watching him. He flashed me a weak smile. “You okay?”

“Are you?”

His response was a slow nod.

When we got home, Kyle walked me to my door. I was glad he did because I wanted to talk to

ne. “My story seemed to make you sad,” I told him, the knot in my stomach twisting a little.

Kyle played with a lock of my hair. “Your head’s full of sweet thoughts, Rain. It’s nice.”

I stared up at him, trying to understand why that was a problem, waiting for him to explain.

“Mine’s not.” He let go of my hair, taking a step back. “I worry about you being around me.”

My heart sank. “Why? Kyle, you’re a good person. I had fun tonight.”

Looking into his eyes made me want to burst out in tears. All I could see there was torment. “

at is it?”

He took another step back. “Don’t worry about me, Rain. Go to bed and dream your sweet dream

“Kyle—” That was all I could say because I didn’t understand. I was totally confused.



Kyle gave me a sad smile, a sympathetic smile, like he knew I didn’t understand, but he wasn’t

explain. “Lock your door, Rain.”



CHAPTER 11

When Kyle left, I locked my front door—because he told me to, he seemed pretty adamant ab

t I would have anyway. I was a shaking, jumpy, scared mess these days—with the crazy threat

erything. Even though Chase told me time and time again I didn’t need to worry about the threat

guy—Stan—couldn’t possibly know where I lived. Still, yikes. It had me scared to be alone.

I went up to my room with knots in my stomach. I hated how tonight ended—Kyle looking uldn’t bear knowing I’d somehow caused him pain.

What had I said, though? That as a boy, he had been sweet and good? That I had loved him?

uld that make him sad?

Terrible things had happened to him, horrible things. He had issues I didn’t understand.

sperately wanted to.

Finally, I couldn’t take it any longer. I shot off my bed and headed down the stairs. I was goile’s house. I knew he had said he was tired, that he wanted to be alone, but I needed to talk to

w. Tonight. I needed to make things right. I couldn’t take this knot in my stomach a minute longer.

When I got to Kyle’s, he wasn’t asleep as I’d feared. He wasn’t even in his house. He was sitti

porch step, drawing. I sat down beside him. “Hi.”

“It was nice tonight,” he said, not looking up from his work.

“I thought so too. But then I somehow blew it.”

He looked up at me. “You didn’t blow it.”

“I made you sad.”

He shook his head, starting to draw again. “Look, don’t worry about me, okay? Seriously.” Be

uld say anything, he changed the subject. Or maybe he didn’t. Maybe I just didn’t understand. “I ca

ur house from here,” he said. He flicked a look up at me, apparently to see how I’d tak

ormation. “I sit out here at night, watching it.”

A warmth filled me hearing him say that. I was overcome with tingles. They ran up and dow



dy. How incredibly comforting and sweet it was to think of him out here at night, watching my h

arding it, especially now, now while I’d been so scared. Too overcome to say anything, I stared

his drawing. I wasn’t surprised to see it was my house … but I was surprised to see how he’d d

y room, all lit up, as though it was glowing, as though an angel were inside.

Kyle had a strange concept of me. It was unsettling, sort of, but nice too. I figured it had to do wi

st together—back when his life was shiny and innocent. I kind of got the feeling he saw me as a sy

that life—even though he said he didn’t remember it. He must have gotten flashes of it sometimes.

I tilted my head, staring at the picture more intently. I furrowed my brow. In the corner, off to the

re seemed to be a shadow of a figure looking up at my house. Seemed to be. But maybe there was

s hard to tell. It was just a darkened area, just getting shaped. Maybe it was going to be a tree

mething.

I glanced over to my house. No, there was no tree in that area, nothing. I knew it was silly, bu

ture had me frightened. Suddenly, my heart was pounding.

Kyle touched my hand. He tentatively held it in his, linking his fingers through mine. “Maybe it

in the picture,” he said, seeming to understand my unspoken fear, seeming to share it as well. “M

m like a big shadow, watching your house.”

I tilted my head. “You don’t know what you’re drawing?”

He let go of my hand and warily rubbed his face. Finally he looked up at me. “I just draw what

in—or what I dream.”

Apparently, he meant figuratively, but either way, my heart pounded with fear. “And you see som

tching my house?”

He took a deep breath, looking away. “I don’t want to tell you this,” he said. “I don’t want to

u.” He ran his hands through his hair. “Look, it’s just a picture. You’re usually all happy and glow

n’t want to make you scared.”

“I am scared Kyle. Explain.”

“No—Rain, it’s just a picture. I swear. Come on, I’ll walk you home. There’s nothing to be afr

there’s nothing there right now. You’re safe.”

I stared at the hand he was offering me. It wasn’t shaking; it wasn’t nervous. And I knew he wo

ve me go back to my house if he thought I was in danger. I knew that. So, I relaxed a little. Though

dn’t understand, totally didn’t understand. Everything about Kyle baffled me. However, I knew he

nt to talk about the picture, he made that pretty clear, so I bit my lip, and didn’t press.

“I don’t want to go home. Not yet,” I said. “I want to talk about tonight—earlier—when I mad

d.”

Just saying it now made me anxious about it all over again, made me just as baffled. He had



ppy and smiling and laughing, and then—grrr!—I’d told my story about him as a kid, when he w

nderful and perfect, and somehow that made him sad.

Kyle blinked, surprised by my turnaround in the conversation. “Rain, it’s not a big deal.”

“It is to me,” I told him, wanting to take him in my arms, wanting to hold him tight and never let

ver let anything bad ever happen to him again. “Kyle, I want to understand.”

He looked up at me and wet his lips. “I don’t think you can—you’re too good. It’s okay, th

riously. It’s not a big deal.” He was silent for a moment, but finally he went on. “I like that you

so much, Rain. I do. It’s nice. But, it’s just … you want me to be like that little kid you knew

nocent and good.”

“You are that kid I knew.”

He shook his head. “No I’m not. I don’t even remember him. And I told you all that stuff I did—

dn’t tell you everything. I’m really messed up. I’m nothing like that kid.”

“Kyle, you are!” Tears started to well in my eyes. “Please don’t think that.”

He ran his hands through his hair. “Look, you should probably go. I’m really sorry, but I n

arette.”

My heart sank. “No. I don’t want to go. I want to stay.”

Kyle seemed bewildered by my intensity. “You can stay if you want,” he said, starting to draw

arettes all over his sketchpad. “But you don’t have to. I’m not planning on killing myself or anythi

I raised an eyebrow. “Good to hear.”

Kyle grinned a little.

“Look, go, okay?” He was basically pleading. “I get the feeling you don’t like to see me smoke—

n’t want you to see it. Only, tonight I’m pretty sure I’m going to smoke one cigarette after another.”

I furrowed my brow. “The drawing’s not working?”

“Usually it does—most of the time.” He lit up a cigarette and drew on it deeply. “But not tonight.

I watched him a moment in silence, wanting desperately to help. Wanting to somehow ease his

t how? What could I do or say? Apparently, nothing. He wanted me to leave. He wanted to be

th his pain—the pain I didn’t understand, but had somehow caused.

But I couldn’t leave. Leaving was unthinkable. So instead I asked, “Do you want to take a walk?”

He looked at me curiously.

I shrugged, feeling kind of lame. I knew his problems were far, far different than mine. But the r



ght be the same, you never know. “When I have a problem—when I feel agitated—I go for a w

ps.”

He drew on his cigarette watching me through the smoke. “You feel agitated?”

I shrugged. “Sometimes.”

I was thinking I might tell him about my email stalker, explain that it had me freaked even t

ase said it was nothing. But right then, Cherri bounded out of the front door, making us jump.

I noticed Kyle put out his cigarette really quick, wincing like it caused him pain to do it. His r

med to be so Cherri didn’t see him smoke. She didn’t.

“Hi!” Cherri chirped. “Do you guys want to come in and play cards with us?” She smiled winni

Mom’s making hot chocolate.”

“Uh … sure. Lets play cards,” Kyle said, helping me to my feet.

I smiled. So much for his bleak plans to smoke one cigarette after another. Instead, we playeme after another. Yahtzee, Uno, Phase 10. We played them all. It was fun.

Pictionary ended up being Kyle’s favorite. Big shock there. He won by a landslide. “This is a

me.” He grinned. “Let’s play it again.”

I groaned, but only for play. What did I care if all of my animals looked like crocodiles? It wasn’

ad to guess what they were.

When it was time for me to go, Kyle grabbed his jacket, saying he would walk me home, whicuching since my house was like three houses away from his, not exactly escort-worthy. Still,

redibly grateful for the gesture. I had scary emails freaking me out and his picture earlier tonight

actly put my mind at ease. Besides, I loved his company.

As we headed down his porch, I thought he was going to slip his jacket on, but he didn’t. Instea

nded it to me. (Nice!)

“It’s getting cold out,” he said, helping me in to it.

The jacket smelled of smoke, but I didn’t mind. It was warm and comforting … and Kyle’s.

On our walk home, I gabbed non-stop about the fun I’d had tonight. Things like “family game

de me sort of jealous of my friends. Nine had a houseful of brothers and sisters and game-nights

use were always fun, even if they were a little chaotic. The same with Chase’s. Chase’s older bro

ane, and Chase were mega competitive. Games at their house got cut-throat. It was a blast. Usually

But my house?

No offense to Mom and Dad, they were the best, but face it, a party of three isn’t much of a party



“I had fun too,” Kyle said.

I smiled, knowing he did. Yay! It made me bring up something I’d wanted to mention. “You p

ur cigarette when Cherri came out.”

“Yeah. I don’t smoke around her,” he said. “She sort of looks up to me. I don’t want to be

luence.”

I’d already known that was the reason. But what he didn’t seem to realize was, that made him a

rson. I mean, he knew he was an influence in his sister’s life, and he tried to be a good one. I like

much.

Just then, a car came roaring down the street. A girl swore at us from the open driver’s window

ed away.

I dropped my jaw, totally not believing that just happened. “Huh? What was that about?”

Kyle bit his lip, staring after the car. “It was Misty.”

“… Oh.” Now it was clear. She was drunk and jealous at seeing Kyle and me together. Classic.

SHREEECH. BAM! We heard the squeal of brakes and then the horrifying yelp of an animal. It

y insides turn.

Kyle and I both started running at the same time—toward the sound. My heart was pounding. I

at I was going to see when I got there, and I didn’t want to see it. Tears started pouring down my

fore we even reached the accident, before I saw the dog’s body lying under Misty’s car.

“Don’t look,” Kyle said.

Taking me in his arms, he had me turn away. But I looked back anyway, watched with a strea

rs as Kyle lifted the dog’s limp body from the dark ground and carried him to the side of the road.

“I didn’t see him,” Misty cried. “He came from out of nowhere.”

“Shhh.” Kyle was petting the limp, lifeless dog. He laid him on the ground, still petting him.

“He’s dead, isn’t he?” Misty sobbed. “I killed him.”

I swallowed, almost certain she was right. The dog was motionless and limp. He seemed dead

sty was drunk and in denial. She stood there hoping she was wrong. That the dog wasn’t dead. I

l that’s what she was hoping even though she kept saying, “I killed him. I killed him.”

“Shhh. Stop talking.” Kyle kept petting the dog. Petting and petting.

At first I felt so sick, but then I started to get this … feeling—warm and tremble-y. And …

rted to be a glow—a pale glow. Around Kyle.



All the hairs on my arm stood on end. Kyle was glowing! And the dog too. A little bit. Mayb

ybe it was the headlights from Misty’s car. Maybe that’s all it was. Maybe the lights were shinin

m oddly, making them look like they were glowing. My heart pounding, I rubbed my eyes, rubbe

bbed. Okay, it was just the lights from the car. It had to be.

Only … I still had that warm, peaceful feeling. Like there should be a glow, like a glow was fitti

Whoa. What was going on? My composure was totally incongruent with the situation. I must be

ough some kind of shock , I told myself. I’m delusional.

As if to prove my point: It happened—just like that. One minute the dog was lying on the street,

e next he was up on his legs, wagging his tail. Alive.



CHAPTER 12

I gasped. “What the—?”

“He’s okay!” Misty laughed. With relief, she danced around. She gave the dog a big hug. “Y

ay, aren’t you fella? Yes, you’re fine.”

The dog turned away from Misty. He gave a frisky bark and licked Kyle’s face.

“Good dog,” Kyle murmured. “Now go home and stay out of the street.”

My heart was in my throat. I didn’t know what just happened. What just happened? I watched

azement as the dog scampered away seeming totally unharmed. Totally unharmed.

It was only then that I noticed I was shivering. I couldn’t stop. The thing was: the dog had se

ad. Dead! I’d been almost positive of it. But then—then, he hopped up and trotted away as though

ugh he hadn’t even been hurt.

It had me shivering. Although I was happy—thrilled, of course—that the dog was okay—still,

quieted. The dog had seemed … dead.

“He must have been stunned,” Kyle said, giving me a sideways glance. The way he said i

arded—it was as though he was trying to feed me an explanation, one he was begging me to swall

de me feel funny.

“Yeah. Must have,” I said woodenly, not sure what to think. I was still shivering though I w

le’s warm jacket. I pulled it tighter around me, hugging my waist, needing warmth and a momlect my thoughts—dwell on what just happened.

Kyle eyed me closely, seeming to be studying my reaction. “Are you okay?”

“What?—oh, yeah. I’m …”

I still felt funny about the way Kyle was acting—so cautious. But maybe he was just concerned f

maybe that’s all it was, why he was watching me like that. Maybe I looked as shaken as I felt. C

think of it, that was probably it. I’d been hysterically bawling moments ago, maybe he was wors going to have a breakdown or something—since I’d been freaking out over a dog that was



nned. Maybe he was worried about my mental stability—worried he was going to have to chec

o a hospital.

I tried to get a grip. After all, what had I been contemplating? That Kyle brought the dog back fro

ad ? That was insanely crazy. And stupid. And crazy.

I cleared my throat. “We should probably go talk to the dog’s owner.”

Kyle raised his eyebrows. “Do you know his owner?”

“Well, no.” The dog had run off, probably home. But where that was, I had no idea.

Misty swaggered over to us. “I thought you said you were cheering up your little sister,” she

cusingly to Kyle. “Is this your little sister?” She eyed me up and down with a scowl. “She doesn’

t little, and she doesn’t look like your sister. Actually, she looks like that cheerleader chick

hool. Chase Michael’s girlfriend.”

“Misty, you’re drunk,” Kyle said. “Go home.”

Misty put her hands on her hips, shooting daggers at Kyle with her eyes. “I knew you were lying

t ‘cheering up your sister’ excuse.”

“I didn’t lie.”

“Right.”

“He really didn’t,” I interjected, quickly explaining about us meeting at Bingo, since it seemed

sn’t going to explain.

Misty narrowed her eyes at me, as though she didn’t believe a word I was saying, but then she tKyle, all purring. “I would have gone with you, you know? To cheer up your sister.” She made a p

e. “You didn’t want me around.”

“Not around my sister,” Kyle said.

“Oh,” Misty exclaimed, “ I’m a bad influence. Is that it, Mr. Sweet-and-Innocent?”

Kyle wet his lips. “Go home Misty.”

She glared at him, narrowing her eyes to angry slits. It seemed as though she was going to ran

n seemed to change her mind. “Yeah. Whatever. I’m out of here.” She stormed to her car.

Kyle watched her go, looking concerned. “She’s pretty drunk,” he said, still watching her. “I b

ve her a ride.”

I nodded, figuring he was right. “Okay.”

He started to walk away, but turned back to me. “I had fun tonight. You’re a good person, Rain.”

“You are too,” I murmured, but he was already gone.



CHAPTER 13

When I got home I crawled into bed without changing into my pajamas, a shivery chill running

y spine. I wished my parents were home. I felt spooked—watched, like earlier tonight when I’d se

ure in the shadows—well, thought I saw a figure in the shadows. I guess there hadn’t been any

re—just my imagination. But I was feeling it now again, big time, only worse. Now it was as th

re was a darkness in my house, an evil “presence.”

It was strange though. What I was feeling now was such a contrast to that warm, glow-y feelin

d out by Misty’s car. That toasty, golden feeling was completely gone now, replaced by somethingat’s what it felt like—something evil was lurking about.

I pressed my hands against my eyes and exhaled slowly. I was being lame, I knew that, but it was

elt—I felt an evil presence and the world looked darker to me now somehow. Like since th

ident—when I’d felt a glowing, shiny peace—it was replaced with something dark and menacing.

It made it so I couldn’t even try to sleep. I kept thinking about the dog—it’s lifeless body

rrifying yelp when Misty’s car slammed into it.

Finally, I pulled off the covers and got out my laptop and brought it into bed with me. Still shiver

ged onto my journal—not my blog, not anymore, no way. I was back to my old-fashioned, just-fo

vate-viewing journal. I wrote about tonight, all the fun I had—bingo, games, walking home with

en, hesitatingly, I wrote about the dog. I was kind of nervous to do it, to actually have the stor

re, in front of me, where I could read it and study it—see it.

I was terrified the dog was dead , I typed. But then I had this warm, peaceful feeling come

e. It was like … I don’t know. I can’t explain it. It was like

Just then the phone rang. I jumped about a mile in the air. But then I was filled with such relief. Iy parents. I was so glad to hear their cheerful voices. It was comforting. When I hung up I felt a hu

mes better.

… Until I looked at my computer.

At the bottom of my journal entry were the words— We’re going to get you, Rain.



CHAPTER 14

I was out of my house like lightening. No way was I sticking around there. It was obviously hau

y heart slammed against my chest as I raced the two houses to Nine’s and banged on her front door

Bang, bang, bang!

Without waiting for anyone to answer, I bolted inside, no permission, no welcome, no nothing, frantic and scared and about to pee my pants.

Lights flipped on as Nine’s family came downstairs to see what the commotion was about.

“I—I was scared,” I explained, not wanting to mention my computer threatening me. It sounde

zy. “My parents are in Vermont.”

Mrs. Butler smiled. She knows I’m a chicken—when I was younger the cartoon Scared-y Cat u

ak me out. “Nine’s babysitting for the Norton’s,” she said. “You can go on up to her room. She shhome any minute.”

Nine’s younger twin sisters giggled together as I passed them on the stairs. I totally ignored them

ent on stilling my thundering heart.

Up in Nine’s room, I paced. Did I really have a paranormal message? Did I? Now, safe in Nine’

low bedroom, it seemed kind of unlikely. Okay, totally unlikely. I mean, who could have typed it?

resence” I’d felt? That was crazy. I was being crazy.

“Rain, get a grip,” I moaned.

There was no evil “presence.” So there was no message. I’d only been seeing things. It had b

ck of the mind. I mean, that had to be it, right? I was thinking about scary stuff, so I imagined scary

scary message.

It seemed a little out there, but that had to be it. Had to. Nothing else made any sense. Beside

y seen the message for a second—one tiny moment—then I threw my computer and ran. Now it se

y. I probably didn’t see anything at all.

Once Nine got home, I hesitantly told her about the computer—just because I tell her everything



redibly embarrassing stuff that I would never tell to another living soul, not even Chase. But I le

dog and Kyle and everything. I don’t know why exactly. I just didn’t want to bring up any of tha

because it involved Kyle and I wanted to protect him. From whatever.

Nine stood listening in stunned silence. “Someone wrote you a threatening message?!”

“Well … maybe not. Probably not. I was just scared and, I don’t know, maybe I … imagined it.”

Nine looked at me as though I was nuts. I mean, how do you imagine a message? Finally she shru

kay. Lets go get your computer and see.”

“No!”

There was no possible way I was going back in my house, never, ever. Especially not at

pecially not tonight.

Eventually, we made Nine’s dad go get my computer. We didn’t tell him about the message, tho

e just told him I had an important assignment on it and I had to get it done.

The whole time he was gone, I worried about him. I kept looking through the window thinking I w

lights blinking on and off in my house, or maybe bolts of lightening or bats. Something. But no

ppened. He came back, safe and sound.

“Thanks a lot, Mr. Butler,” I said, feeling guilty sending him over to my house in his rob

ppers. But he just smiled and said it was no problem. (Nine’s parents humor me all the time. I

y’re really, really glad they don’t have such a melodramatic daughter themselves, but they seem t

okay, anyway.)

I took my computer upstairs to Nine’s room, but I was too afraid to open the lid.

“Open it already!” Nine said, hovering over me.

I shook my head, afraid to look, to see the words. But finally after forever, I sucked in my breat

ed the lid, then I gave a little laugh of relief. There was no threatening message. No message at al

y pathetic journal entry.

“No ‘I’m going to get you Rain?’” Nine asked with disappointment.

I quickly snapped the lid shut, not wanting Nine to see my journal, read about the dog.

“No message,” I said. “Just a crazy best friend.”

“Nah, just an over-imaginative best friend,” Nine said. “You must have eaten a lot of sugar. Yo

oky at night when you’ve had sugar. By the way,” she smiled, “who’s jacket is that?”

Flushing, I looked down at what I was wearing, just realizing now I still had it on—Kyle’s jacke

“Oh …”



I looked up at Nine and she raised her eyebrows. “It’s smokin’.”

She was talking about the smell. And so, of course, she already knew whose jacket it was. I rolle

es and quickly explained how I’d innocently come upon Kyle at bingo. I told her about all the fu

d getting ice cream and telling stories and playing games at his house. I left out how I felt after

ough—after the dog incident—about how my world turned all dark and creepy.



CHAPTER 15

A mob of demon-like people in dark hooded cloaks—they’re searching for me! They’re car

ches, crawling through caves, winding through twisted, gnarled trees, calling me, hunting m

de behind boulders, fall into bushes, running, running. Then Kyle—he’s suddenly beside me as

hide. He covers me with his arms, trying to conceal me, make me invisible. But he can’t! Th

ming. They’re coming and they’re going to get me….

“Rain! Geez, Rain wake up!”

I sat up with a gasp, covered in a cold sweat, my heart pounding.

“They’re going to get me,” I mumbled, pulling the blankets around me.

Nine looked amused. “Who’s going to get you? The computer threatener?”

I rubbed my eyes and blinked. It took more than a moment to truly believe I’d only been dreaminghad only been a nightmare. It seemed so real. Still seemed real. But here I was, safe on the guest

ne’s room, not in some dark, foggy woods hiding from cloaked people.

For a moment I felt comforted, but only for a moment. Then a terrifying thought washed over m

ghtmare had something to do with Kyle bringing that dog back from the dead . For an instant, I

with cold certainty, as a fact. But just thinking it brought a new wave of chills running through my

hy would I even think that? Of course Kyle didn’t bring the dog back from the dead; it had only

nned. What was the matter with me?

As quickly as the thought had come, I whisked it away. It was too scary. Too creepy. And yea

zy.

Kyle didn’t bring the dog back to life. He didn’t. It had never been dead. Kyle didn’t have “sp

wers, evil powers, any powers. He was just a boy. A normal boy. My friend. No. Evil. Powers.

Nine chuckled. “You were moaning and screaming about ‘cloaked people.’” She yawned. “No

ght ice-cream runs for you, not if you’re going to sleep in my room.”

“Sorry,” I murmured.



“That’s okay,” she said with another yawn. “I’m kind of hungry, want a Pop Tart?”



CHAPTER 16

The mob of demon-like people are searching for me. Carrying torches, they wind through tw

arled trees, calling me….

I woke in a cold sweat, a scream strangled in my throat.

The class laughed.

“Oh … great,” I groaned, slinking down in my seat. I’d fallen asleep in World Lit.

It was the nightmare—I was having it almost every night now. I wasn’t sure what it was about,

s suddenly having it— all the time—but it was ruining me, making it so I couldn’t sleep at night.

aid to sleep at night.

I looked up to see Kyle’s concerned eyes on me from across the classroom—he wasn’t laughin

rest of the class. He didn’t seem to think my nightmare was funny.

When the bell rang, I hurried to catch Kyle so we could talk and actually catch-up, maybe I w

en tell him about my dream. But he bolted out of the classroom like it was on fire.

“Kyle!” I called after him. “ Kyle!”

But he didn’t turn around; he slipped into the crowd of student traffic and disappeared dow

hool hall. I watched him go furrowing my brow. He heard me—I know he did. The guy was avo

.

The funny thing was, for a while—over a week—I had avoided Kyle. I’m not sure why, ex

mething about the dog—the dark, evil feeling I had after he was okay—and the nightmares—some

le was scary in my nightmares, though I couldn’t remember exactly why. But those things—they

kind of afraid of Kyle.

The horrible feeling I had gotten after the dog incident made me worry that there was somethin

out Kyle, like what he did brought on an evil presence, one that threatened me. I hated thinkin

ugh. I didn’t want to think that. Besides, it crazy to think that. My computer did NOT threaten m

feeling I’d had that night, of an evil presence—that wasn’t Kyle’s problem, that was mine. I w



cken with an over-active imagination; he was just a nice boy that walked me home.

So, after a week of avoiding Kyle, I started to long for him again—just to be near him. But, s

w I realized he was avoiding me as well.

***

Kyle transferred out of one of my classes and tried to get out of the second too, but Mrs. W

uldn’t let him switch.

“Kyle, are you trying to avoid me?” I asked after class when I heard him trying yet again to per

s. Walker to rearrange his schedule. I cornered him at the door as soon as the bell rang so he cou

n from me this time.

Kyle’s eyes twinkled at my question and he grinned, “I like you a lot, Rain—I do. But my shedule—it doesn’t totally revolve around you.”

“Oh,” I reddened as we walked out of class together. “Then what’s up?”

“I got a job,” he said, glaring at his schedule sheet. “I need a study-hall to fit in homework.”

“Oh, you got a job? Where?”

I felt out of the loop. We hadn’t talked since the night he walked me home—not more than me ch

m down at school yelling, “Kyle wait!” and him ducking behind corners. Seriously, that’s what

e.

I longed to talk with him now, to catch up. But at the same moment I asked about his job,

prised him, coming up from behind. She hopped on to his back, like she wanted a piggy-back-ride

“Let’s go, cowboy!” she giggled. “To class!”

“See you, Rain,” Kyle called over his shoulder, but when he glanced back, his brow furro

parently, he saw I was hurt, because one minute he was giving Misty a ride, the next he was ser away, though she scowled at me as she went, walking backwards and mouthing swearwords at us

Now Kyle was beside me, looking into my eyes, giving me his full attention. His warm hand la

to my shoulder. It caught me off guard and made my cheeks flush for some reason, though I co

ure out why.

“I can’t be near you, Rain,” he whispered in my ear.

Having him so close was doing strange things to me—making me sweaty and tingly and flutteryse things, all at the same time.



He wet his lips. “I can’t. Not very much. I want to—I’m drawn to you, I am. But it’s not good fo

m not good for you.”

Tilting my head, I stared up at him, my brows drawing together. “That’s why you’re avoiding me

nk you’re bad for me?”

His breath caressed my ear, warmed my body. “Rain, I am. You’re afraid—I can feel that—

u’re not right this second, but—” He stepped away from me as though he had been too close, and I

ow, I guess he had been. A moment ago, I could feel his warm breath on my neck, but now thpped away, I missed his warmth, the feel of him near. I felt cold without him.

He went on with pain in his voice, “Since I’ve been around you, you’ve been afraid. You didn’t

be, but you are now. I’m kind of linked to you, Rain. It seems like, a little bit. I can feel when—

sitated, like he didn’t want to go on. “Look, I know you’re afraid.”

I stared at him with tingles running through my body. Every hair on my arm was standing on en

t he was linked to me? I didn’t even know exactly what that meant, but it seemed sweet. “You’re l

me?”

His answer was a slow nod.

The bell rang and he watched me silently as everyone scattered for classes.

“Rain, go to class.”

I didn’t move.

Kyle backed away raising his eyebrows, apparently wanting to make sure I headed into my fore he ran to his. But I had questions. I couldn’t leave things the way they were. I needed h

plain, so I stood firmly planted where I was, waiting.

But Kyle set his jaw—he wasn’t going to talk. He gestured with his hands for me to scoot alo

red at him defiantly, but he just stared back. Finally, I let out a breath and relented, trudging t

story without getting answers, but only giving-in because I didn’t want Kyle to get in trouble for

e for class.

I sat through class unable to listen—to anything but my pounding heart. My brain was in a dazeuld think was: Kyle feels linked to me? L-i-n-k-e-d to me? Huh?

***

Ugh! Kyle continued to avoid me—completely. I hardly ever saw him, only at night, when I peeke

y window; there he’d be, watching my house. It always gave me a warm feeling to see that, a feeli



ace. But that made me wonder—so, why had I been afraid of him? Afraid he’d brought an evil pre

en seeing him only brought me peace?

It seemed Kyle had been troubled about that too , I wrote in my journal. Writing about Kyl

come a daily ritual. It had to be done or my day wasn’t complete—as far as I was concerned.

Like he could tell—sense—I was afraid of him, back when I was. Maybe that’s what he m

linked to me. He can read my feelings, because we’re connected by a bond of friendship

ets” me. I’m pretty sure that’s what he meant.

Maybe he had sensed I was afraid of him and it had hurt his feelings. Maybe that’s why

oiding me now.

But no, I think it’s more than that. He seems to think he deserves to be feared. But he does

ed to show him that—show him that I’m not afraid of him. That I know he’s good.

For the next few weeks, I looked for Kyle in the halls at school. Usually I didn’t see him

enever I did—which, as I said, wasn’t very often—he was always with Misty or another girl that

well have been Misty. He seemed to have a wild-girl preference, which made me sort of sad.

But I looked for him in the halls anyway, wanting to make sure he was doing okay, wanting to

e I was there if he ever needed me.

Finally, one morning I saw him at his locker and for once he was alone. “Let’s go talk to Kyle,”

ase, pulling him in that direction.

I know Chase had said he hated Kyle, but that was just a moment of anger talking. Deep down C

s as glad as everyone else that Kyle was safe and home. He just didn’t like that Kyle and I nnection. And I understood that. It would be hard not to.

Chase let me drag him towards Kyle—not exactly putting up a fight, but not jumping at the chan

et him, either. Only then, it was weird. When Kyle saw us coming—and I’m positive he saw us—

ckly headed off in the other direction. That hurt my feelings! But it only made Chase grin. “I gu

nts us to leave him alone,” he said.

“I guess,” I murmured, still feeling hurt.

Why did Kyle do that?

My relationship with Kyle outside of school wasn’t much better—but it was some, maybe. At le

me he didn’t avoid me. In fact, he always seemed glad to see me, but the thing was, he was a

sy. Busy, busy, busy. The job he’d gotten was part-time, working at an auto repair shop. Whe

ance to see him, he was always on his way to work, or all grimy and itching to take a shower

rk. A girl can only take so many “I have to go, but it was great seeing you” lines before she sta

nder if it really was all that great seeing her.

The saddest part about Kyle’s job was, I knew the Ryans hadn’t wanted Kyle to work this year.



nted their son to be close to home and concentrate on his studies. But Dr. Strong told them Kyle w

dy for total reliance. “Kyle’s been on his own a long time. He needs to hold on to some o

dependence,” the doctor told them. “At the moment, your son doesn’t feel secure enough to

pendence on anyone, not even his family.”

I knew Mrs. Ryan was disappointed Kyle wasn’t the teen she had once envisioned him growing

t I knew she had to understand. And I hoped she was happy that he was at least a good, kind per

ew I was.

Thursday after school, I saw Kyle’s car in his driveway. For once he was actually home an

hing off to work. I ran in the house, happy I was going to be able to do what I had hoped. I pick

phone and quickly dialed Kyle’s number.

“Rain?—hi.” Kyle seemed happy that I called.

I’d planned on calling him all day today, but now that I was actually doing it, I was curio

cover my hands were sweating.

“Hi—uh,” I tripped over my carefully planned speech. “Our youth group is getting together tonig

“Your what?”

I started over, feeling like a dork. “The teenagers—from our church—we’re getting together to

lleyball at our church building, in the gym, and I was wondering if you’d like to come?”

“To your church?”

Our church, I wanted to correct him, but didn’t.

“To play volleyball,” I stressed, so he wouldn’t think I was trying to “push” him to come to ch

ce his doctor said we shouldn’t do that. But I wanted Kyle to have good influences around him, to

m make right choices, and let him see he was good, not a scary guy that was bad for me—or anyon

to be around. I figured if he could just get involved with the kids from church they could giv

idance and confidence. Help him choose the right path now that he was home with a loving famil

ually had choices.

Kyle was silent for a moment. “I kind of missed out on all that sports stuff,” he said. “I think I’mpass, but thanks for inviting me.”

“Well, you don’t really have to play,” I told him. “You could just watch—and meet people. I’ll w

th you, if you want. And I’m bringing cookies.”

Kyle was silent again. “If you really want me to come that bad, I will … I guess.” He didn’t soun

husiastic about it, but I was ecstatic.

“Great. It starts at seven,” I told him, thinking our conversation was over. But Kyle surprised m

king, “What kind of cookies are you bringing?”



“Umm, what’s your favorite?”

“What’s the kind you brought to my party—the kind with the cinnamon on it?”

“Snickerdoodles?” I smiled. “Those are my favorite.”

“Mine too,” he said.

I laughed with giddiness—like a moron. “Okay. I’ll bring Snickerdoodles.”

***

By the time Kyle showed up at the church gym our first game was halfway over. When I saw him

in, I missed an easy shot, surprised to see that he’d actually come.

At the end of our phone conversation this afternoon I had asked Kyle if he wanted Chase and

k him up for the activity. The offer seemed to put a damper on things—maybe it was beca

ntioned Chase. I wasn’t sure why, but that seemed to make Kyle reluctant.

“No, that’s okay,” Kyle had said. “I might leave early.”

The way he’d said that left me with the sinking feeling that he might not come at all. But here he w

s of course ecstatic to see him, but embarrassed as well, since the first thing he witnessed wa

owing an easy shot.

“Hi Kyle!” I called and everyone turned around to greet him as well.

He waved and took a seat up on the stage. Lauren Hunter, our student body secretary, went ove

beside him. Lauren had a hurt wrist, so she wasn’t able to play. I was glad she went over to

cause I would have felt weird quitting in the middle of the game, but I had told Kyle I would just

th him. I doubted Kyle minded Lauren substituting for me, though. Lauren was pretty and fun,

eerleader no less. (Chase seemed to think she was great.)

I tried concentrating on the game, and not on Kyle and Lauren … but it was sort of hard. Laurekind of girl I wanted Kyle to associate with—not Misty Saunders. Lauren would be a wond

luence in his life, help him see that he was good and could receive forgiveness for the things h

ne in his troubled past. She could help him make good choices, not mess up his life at stoner pa

ay, I decided, if he’s not going to date Nine, Lauren is definitely an awesome second choice

uren!

“Rain!” both Chase and Nine scolded me when I missed another easy shot.

“Sorry,” I muttered, vowing to concentrate. And I did. After that, I was Miss Volleyball.



“Alright,” Chase gave me a high-five as our team won the game—due to my once in a lifetime sp

“You’re really good,” Kyle told me when Chase and I wandered over to him.

“Thanks.” I glowed, not telling him that I’d just played the best game of my life. Instead, for

son, I acted as though I played this well all the time, which was just sad. I reddened. “This is Cha

Kyle and Chase shook hands. “You’re quite an artist,” Chase said. It had sounded like an h

mpliment, only I was afraid I heard a slight edge to it.

If Kyle noticed, he didn’t let on. “It’s nice to meet you,” he said. “Rain talks about you a lot.”

“Does she?” Chase put his arm around me. “It’s good to have you back, man,” he told Kyle. This

sounded completely sincere.

“Well, I need to take off,” Kyle said. “But it was nice meeting you Chase—and Lauren,” he gav

affectionate glance, then handed me my plate of Snickerdoodles. “Thanks for the cookies,” he said

I took the plate, feeling uneasy. “Well, thanks for coming.” I leaned on one foot, then the other. u sure you don’t want to stick around?”

He shook his head, saying he had things he needed to do. Still feeling uneasy, I followed him o

car. As he was opening the door to his Honda I blurted out, “Are you mad at me?”

Kyle turned back to me, looking bewildered. “Why would I be mad at you?”

“I don’t know.” I thought maybe he was mad that I hadn’t left the game—but that was, of course, d

’s just—you just got here and …”

“Look,” he said, shutting his car door, leaning against it, “I know what you’re trying to do—g

volved in your church. And with the people. And I don’t mind. I don’t. They’re nice. But I only

re because you wanted me to. I’m not interested in church, or playing volleyball. I’m not what you

m not that innocent eight year-old kid you used to know. He’s gone.”

Tears formed in my eyes. “No he’s not. Don’t say that.”

Kyle looked at my tears in bewilderment. “I hurt you? I’m sorry.” He put his arms around me. “D

y. You want me to go back in? I’ll go back in.”

I sniffled. “You will?”

Kyle raised his eyebrows. “I’ll do whatever will make you stop crying.”

Touched, I took his warm hand, feeling a warmth wash through me as I dragged him back towa

urch. “Then come back in, have some more cookies, and yak it up with Lauren and Nine.”



CHAPTER 17

Kyle seemed to have a good time after he came back into the building. We actually got him to

lleyball and he was amazingly good. I think he surprised himself. And I think he was surprised th

oyed himself too.

It was a good-type of strange to see him in our church again, after he had been away for so long,

med he kind of remembered being here, a little bit. It seemed like he did. I saw him look aroundybe getting flashes from the past.

When he left the gym sweating, to get a drink from the water fountain out in the hall of our build

ently (stalker-like) followed him, watching him hesitantly explore the building. He peeked

ssrooms, and then reverently, hesitantly, I saw him open the doors to the chapel.

I swear—I swear —in the instant he opened the doors, a light shone on him, like he was glowing.

Whoa! My heart shot like a rocket, jamming into my chest.

I gasped so loud Kyle heard me. Surprised, he jerked and spun around towards me and I got a gli

his eyes—they looked shiny, eerily illuminated … but only for a moment, a split-second. It happ

o fast for me to really “see.”

The glow around Kyle faded as the chapel doors silently closed behind him. I blinked and rubbe

es—Kyle looked completely normal again. Everything happened too fast. What did I actually see?

Kyle knitted his brow, looking at me with concern. “Rain … are you okay?” He gave me an u

ile. “You’re shaking. You look scared.”

I could say the same about him. He looked pretty shaken as well. He was all pale and biting the

his lip; his eyes looked haunted. What did he see? Or was it what he felt?

For a moment, I still couldn’t breathe, let alone speak. I could only stare at him in awe, thou

oked normal now—troubled, but not eerily illuminated as he had seemed a moment ago; as h

emed the night he saved the dog.

“I need to sit down,” I whispered, stumbling to the couch in the foyer. I dropped into it, trying to



y breath and still my pounding heart. Though I wasn’t quite sure what I saw, I burst out, “Kyle, you

owing!”

Kyle winced. He stopped coming toward me—stopped abruptly. He’d been going to sit beside m

w he didn’t only not come any closer, he backed away.

“Rain,” he started. He ran his hands through his shaggy hair as though about to tear i

decisiveness flickered in his eyes. It seemed he was going to tell me something—something impor

ited holding my breath, only then he seemed to decide against telling me. Instead he swallcking away even further. “I need to go, Rain.”

His face was white as a sheet. “Don’t follow me.”

***

That night I shivered as I typed in my journal about Kyle glowing when he opened the chapel d

riously, he seemed to glow! Just like the night with that dog. There seemed to be a light ar

m then too. Seemed to be. Okay, maybe both cases were just me being overly-imaginative.

her night it had probably just been Misty’s car lights, and tonight the lights were on in the ch

hen Kyle opened the doors it just made him look like he glowed. I guess that’s all there was

I guess. Boy, it’s weird though. Kyle’s pictures of angels must be getting to me.

When I finally finished writing and turned off the light and crawled into bed, I was still thinking

le. But, of course, when I finally slept I dreamed about demons in hooded cloaks.

***

In the morning, I woke in a cold sweat, a scream almost escaping my lips. But instead of scream

out a breath of relief. “It was only a dream.”

The nightmare had seemed so real a moment ago, yet now I could barely remember it. Still, th

cker of memory had me shivering. I didn’t know why though. It was silly, really. This dream d

en have me in it. Only Kyle. But it was in the same place as my other scary dreams, in a dark fore

re were spirits all around, just like my other dreams. Only this time there were two kinds of spi

od and evil. In my dream, they seemed to be vying for Kyle’s soul.

Remembering it now, made me tremble and think about the night when the dog had been hit by M

. I had felt a peace when the dog was okay, but then afterward, I had felt a scary presence. That

y my dream had felt, good and peaceful, then dark and scary.



It made me think of Kyle that way too, a little bit. I could see the good in him, of course. Only

uld also see the bad in him too. It was like he was walking a fine line. His childhood had been f

odness, but he didn’t even remember that. What he remembered was all the horrible things that

er. His past was riddled with disturbingly twisted, evil things that counteracted everything before

ce that was all he could remember … ugh! It was sad.

But as for the glowing thing—me seeing Kyle glow sometimes? I decided that it had to do wit

awing me as an angel all the time, making me out to be glowing. I think it got me seeing things like

le bit. Being so wrapped up in him seemed to be having a strange effect on me—making me see “d “evil” in a strange way. It was like I was starting to see things the way Kyle saw them.

Things were either bright and glow-y and good, like an angel, or they were dark and haunting an

like a demon. It was just a trick of the mind … or sight. But I liked it. I couldn’t help it, I did. I

nking of Kyle glowing—full of goodness. I wanted to see it more, yearned to see it more.

So, I might have started doing a little “pushing” even though I knew I wasn’t supposed to, and I

t to, but it was so hard! And frustrating. Kyle had fun that night at the volleyball game, he did! He

people, and he had liked being back at church. I could tell . He did. I had seen his eyes as he lound, remembering things. He had felt good, at peace, I’d seen him glow —even if it wasn’t for re

y heart, it seemed real.

Still, I couldn’t get him to go to any more church activities after that. He was always too busy.

ubted he would have come anyway. I mean I assumed he found time to go to parties with Mis

casion. His priorities seemed askew, probably because he was more comfortable with what h

ed to, risky things. But he used to be addicted to drugs and those kinds of parties, and the wild gi

ed—it seemed like they would lead him right back to his old life—the one that got him arreste

e that forced him to do things that made him now think he was bad.

One morning when I saw him in the school parking lot, I confronted him about it.

“Look, I work a lot of hours,” he said. “And volleyball and taking food to shut-ins—that’s just no

e.”

“Kyle, what is your life?” I asked challengingly.

I understood he wasn’t used to good and wholesome—that those kinds of activities didn’t used

rt of his life. I just didn’t understand why they couldn’t be now. After all, he had enjoyed volleen he gave it a chance. And he’d had fun playing games with me and his family. Why couldn’t h

ose things as becoming a normal part of his life?

Kyle seemed sobered by my question. “What’s my life?” He ran his hands through his hair. “I’m

figure that out.”

“Meanwhile, you’re going to drug parties with Misty Saunders?”

Kyle stared at me. “Why do you care what I do?”



I was bewildered that he needed to ask. “Because you’re my friend, Kyle. And I don’t want to se

ss up your life.”

“And miniature golf is going to help it?”

“No. Miniature golf is fun. And it’s not going to fry your brain and make you stupid.”

Misty sauntered over to us, slipping her hand in Kyle’s. He gave her a light kiss before telling h

eded to talk to me alone.

She gave him a quizzical look, then glared at me. “Okay,” she said crisply. “You need to ta

icky-Chick-McChurch, fine. Talk.” She stormed away seeming mad.

Kyle watched her go, looking distracted, then turned back to me.

“I don’t do drugs,” he said. “I don’t even drink. I haven’t since I went to that substance abuse pro

l I do is smoke, and I’m trying to quit.”

I blinked, more than a little surprised to hear that—alcohol was prevalent with the crowd heund—that and a lot worse.

“That’s great, Kyle,” I told him. “It really is. But you go to parties where it’s everywhere. You’re

that environment with those people. Kyle, they’ll suck you back into that life. Those people,

rties—it’s bad. A bad influence.”

He ran his hands through his hair. “Look, can’t you give me a break?”

I was disheartened to hear him say that. Of course I could give him a break. If anyone desereak, it was him. But I had to be honest. I owed him that. And I desperately wanted him to understan

“I just hate to see you ruin your life. You’re a great guy—but you’ve been through so much and

u’re making bad choices. It hurts me to see that.”

Again, Kyle ran his hands through his hair. “Look, I’m glad that you care, seriously. It’s nice tha

e. But Rain, can’t you let up—just a little? I’m trying to figure things out.”

I bit my lip, knowing I should relent, just back off. Wasn’t that what he was telling me to do? Bu

ng was, in a strange way, I felt responsible for him. And it had little to do with Mrs. Ryan asking fo

istance. It was because when we were eight years old he used to whisper my testimony to me. I w

do that now for him.

“Can’t I help you figure things out? Kyle, when you first came back you said you wanted us

se, like we used to be. Why don’t you want that any more?”

He ran his hands through his hair. “It’s not that I don’t want it,” he said. “I do.” He looked int

es. “Seriously. I want it a lot. It’s just that I don’t think I can be what you want. And I don’t li

appoint you.”



I leaned against his car in frustration. “Kyle, really, I just want you to be happy.”

Kyle started to back away from me, just like he always did. “Well, let me figure out what make

ppy, then.”

***

I sort of took Kyle’s words as a brush off. And I was still feeling wounded when I went to wor

ht at Pizza Haven. Maybe that’s why it seemed everything was going wrong. Near closing time, I

one call that was the topping on the cake.

“Hey, one of your drivers hit my dog,” a guy complained angrily as soon as I answered the phone

“Oh, my gosh. I’m so sorry,” I said, figuring it must have been our new driver, Corey. He ha

rted this week and seemed to be sort of … driving-challenged. He hadn’t even put in twenty hourd already he’d gotten two tickets.

“Is your dog okay?” I asked, wondering how to handle this. Would the guy try to sue?

“What do you mean is he okay? Your driver just ran him over, for crying out loud! He wants three

zas, a two-liter bottle of root beer, and some chicken wings—do you have chicken wings?”

I smiled. “Yes. We have chicken wings. Would your dog like anything else?”

“Some Snickerdoodles would be nice.” Kyle gave up his angry-guy act. “You kind of blew my

night, Rain.”

I furrowed my brow, having no clue what he was talking about. “How?”

“I was at this party. It should have been fun—a lot of flesh and swearing. But the bawling-ou

ve me this morning—it kind of ruined it for me.”

I smiled. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, you sound sorry,” he grumbled playfully. “Anyway, I came home early. But look what

ced me to do. I’m so bored, I’m doing lame crank calls.”

“Well, it’s no miniature golf,” I told him. “But you had me going. I thought I was going to have t

or Corey.”

“Yeah? Maybe I’ll crank call your mom next. I’ll tell her we’re getting married—that would

r, huh?”

I shrugged. “Maybe not. My mom likes you.”



“She does?” Kyle seemed pleasantly surprised. “Well, that’s just because she doesn’t know

yway,” he said, “I should probably let you get back to work. But remember I left a party because o

I’m telling you this in case it’s worth cookie points.”

“It is,” I told him with a smile. “Massive cookie points.”

***

I hung up the phone after talking with Kyle, a happy smile lingering on my lips. The phone rang

ht after we said our goodbyes and my stomach fluttered, hoping it was Kyle calling me back. “H

s is Pizza Haven,” I chirped into the phone. “Can I help you?”

The line was staticky and the words were hushed and whispered, but I heard them. Clearly.

“We’re going to get you, Rain!” was whispered into my ear. “Your little boyfriend is going to kilfor us!”



CHAPTER 18

With shaking hands, I called Chase to come get me from work. After getting that horrifying phone

was too shaky to drive. I would get into a car accident, I was positive. But really, it was more than

was too terrified to even get into my car—alone. No way could I drive.

However, Chase seemed put out when I called. He was tired of me being afraid of everything. It

be just scary movies he wanted to see, but now, since I’d started getting those threatening emails

blog, everything had me jumping. Chase was tired of it. I knew that and I knew that was why he w

willing to be comforting now. But I needed him to be comforting. Now.

“Rain, I’m at work right now,” he said. “I can’t just drop everything and come get you because y

ared—you’re scared of everything.”

“But,” a tear slid down my cheek. I felt hurt and misunderstood. “Chase they said my boyfrien

ng to kill me.”

“Yeah, and that’s just dumb,” he said. “I’m not going to kill you. What ?—you’re afraid I’m go

l you now?”

“No—but.” Now I felt stupid. “It was scary—they whispered it all scary sounding, and there wa

static, like …”

Chase waited. “Like, what?” he finally asked.

Like it came from demons, I wanted to say, but didn’t. Of course. I hadn’t told Chase about my

mputer message that I had gotten the other night (or okay, didn’t get, but had freaked out about, thi

id.) He knew I’d run over to Nine’s all scared and spent the night there instead of at home. He kn

d chickened out.

“Look, I don’t think this is really about the phone call,” Chase said. “The phone call is s

viously it was a crank call, Rain. I think you’re still just scared about those emails from your blog

ur blog didn’t have your last name or your address or anything. The guy can’t find you.”

This was about the phone call. It was totally about the phone call. But there was no way of convi

ase of that. Suddenly, I felt angry towards him. He was controlling, just like Nine said. He h

ntrol everything. Everything! He was even controlling this phone call, telling me it wasn’t about w

s saying it was about. No, no, no of course not. It was about whatever he said it was about. Ugh!



Still, I went along with his blog argument, because I was tired and weak from fright. And I had a

int. I grumbled lamely, “He could find me, if he wanted. Anyone could. My name is Rain—it’s

rmal name.”

Chase’s voice softened, went comforting, “Rain, he’s not going to get you. He was just a wack-o

th your blog. You gave him what he wanted, you stopped posting. You let him win. It’s over.”

Only, it wasn’t. I’d gotten another post from him, recently. I didn’t bother mentioning it to Chase a

ough. He would just dismiss it again, like he did that day. Like he always did.

“Rain, babe. You’re safe. Drive home and call Nine—have a sleep over.”

I hung up clinching my jaw, feeling scared and alone. Chase was always hovering over me, al

t when I needed him, he wasn’t there…. He didn’t listen.

Ugh! I would have been more angry, only I was too scared to deal with anger right now. I did no

go out in that dark parking lot alone. I couldn’t. Just thinking about it sent me into a panic a

aking uncontrollably all over again.

“Nine doesn’t even have the car tonight,” I reminded myself aloud, wondering what I was going t

But just then, like an answer to my unspoken prayer, Kyle came walking in the door.

“Hi,” he said. “Are you okay?”

***

“But I guess it’s dumb,” I told Kyle, sitting out in his car in front of my house. He had bought me

ocolate to warm me up, since I was shaking so bad. We had been sitting here a long time, rehashin

one call. “I mean, Chase is my boyfriend. Chase … he’s an Eagle Scout. He’s not going to kill me

“But that’s what they said?” Kyle’s eyes, as well as his voice, were full of concern. He sou

ubled. “Your little boyfriend’s going to kill you?”

“Yeah.” I gave a little laugh. “They obviously haven’t seen Chase.”

Chase was huge, the star of the football team. No one would call him little. Not even demons

king it all out made me feel so much better. It was nice to have someone listen and care. And now

’d talked about it thoroughly, I felt way more relaxed about it. It was obviously just a crank call

t them all the time at Pizza Haven. “Even you crank called me tonight,” I said.

Kyle nodded, not exactly looking convinced, in fact, not looking convinced at all. Still, he

mfortingly, “I’m sure you’re fine. Still, Rain, I don’t think you should be alone tonight. Your paren



l gone?”

I nodded. “Until tomorrow.”

Kyle’s soft lips drew into a tight line. “Could you have a friend come over and stay with you

ter, could you stay at a friends?”

He wanted me to use his cell phone to call Nine, not wanting me to go in my house. He wa

ating this way different than Chase. It was a little embarrassing to have him so concerned, tho

an, I was being silly.… Right?

“I still can’t get over you coming into Pizza Haven when you did.” I played with Kyle’s p

sently. “I was so scared. I didn’t know what I was going to do.”

Kyle stared down at my hands, then into my eyes. “I told you, Rain. I’m linked to you. I just had th

ling.” His gaze deepened. “I was worried for you.”

Hearing him say that, tingles ran through my body, up and down. It was eerie and sweet, his g

rds, the way he spoke them, so tender and sincere, it made my heart practically burst. I was all d gushy inside. “I feel really close to you too, Kyle,” I murmured. “We have a special bon

endship. I like that so much.”

Kyle’s gaze sank down to the phone in my hands. He nodded toward it. “Call your friend, Rain.”

***

It ended up that Nine came over to my house since two of her little brothers were sick and thro

Mrs. Butler didn’t want me to catch their germs—and Nine seemed grateful to get away from

, Kyle walked us to my house, then went inside and searched around, making sure everything wa

ary.

“Okay, I guess everything’s alright,” he said, suddenly at my front door, ready to leave. “Lock

en I go.”

“Or just stay,” I told him, sort of pleading. “At least for a while.”

I knew he was going to go home and sit on his porch and watch my house. I knew he was goi

aw and draw and draw and try not to smoke. But couldn’t he do those things here? I felt so much

th him here. When he was near I felt normal, better than normal. I felt protected.

“Just stay, Smoky Shadows,” I said, doing my best Sasha imitation. When we were kids, I’d al

that—plead to him like Sasha always did to Smoky in the cartoons we loved to watch toget

ways did it when I wanted him to do something I knew he didn’t want to. And he would always g



me, just like Smoky always did for Sasha.

Kyle tilted his head, biting off a small smile. He looked at me with wonder. “We used to play

h? It was you.”

I nodded, tingles running through my body. He remembered!

His eyes were glowing, looking happy. “I always wanted to be Smoky for you,” he said. He b

“I wanted to save you from everything bad.”

“Save me now!” I said, my heart sinking as I saw that look in his eyes, the look he got every tim

cked away from me. “Kyle, stay with us.”

“Rain, I can’t.” He looked into my eyes, as though he was trying to make me understand. It

rk, though. I didn’t understand. I didn’t understand at all. He had saved me—he wasn’t b

atever he thought. He was my hero. Why couldn’t he stay?

He said it again, “I can’t.” His gaze flicked around my house one last time. Then he said g

ook, lock your door, okay?”

***

All night, Nine and I kept taking turns looking out my window to see if Kyle was still watchin

use. He always was—always.

Nine groaned, “That’s weird,” but in the same breath she added, “And romantic.”

She flopped on my couch. “If he wasn’t so yummy hot—and sweet—I’d say call the cops. But sin

is, I think you should send S.O.S. signals so he’ll come running over.” Nine chuckled. “Geez, he

or you bad, Rain.”

I rolled my eyes. She said that all the time. All the time. It made me groan. “Nine, he avoids m

plague. You saw him tonight, I begged him to stay, but he practically ran to get away from me.”

“Yeah, what’s that about?” Nine flipped off the television, though she’d just turned it on. “He sta

u like you’re an angel, shining light from heaven. And the pictures he draws of you—geesh! But he

n from you. I see him at school. He watches you, Rain—from afar, all the time. But if you turn his

bam! He takes off.”

She said that before, all the time in fact, but hearing it now made the hairs on my arms stand on

dn’t get Kyle. Not at all…. But I liked him. A lot.

“Isn’t it weird how he just showed up at your work?” she said again for like, the thousandth time



I took a deep breath and nodded, still kind of amazed about that. “He said he just all of a sudde

e he should check on me.”

“Whoa, that’s creepy,” Nine said. “And romantic. It’s like Smokey Shadows! He would al

oop in and save Sasha when she was scared.”

I bit off a laugh, reddening and feeling slightly embarrassed, because I’d already thought of that

l like Sasha. It was nice—incredibly so—having my own Smoky Shadows watching over me, wat

y house.

I looked out my window. Kyle was still on his porch, drawing intently. My Smokey.



CHAPTER 19

Monday Kyle caught me after third period as I was gathering up my books. “You made it throug

ekend,” he said.

“Yeah, thanks to my guardian across the street.” I gave him an appreciative smile as I zipped u

ckpack. All Friday night he watched my house. At least until Nine and I finally settled down for sl

Kyle flashed me a warm, swoon-worthy smile. “Thanks for the cookies.”

I’d brought them to church with me Sunday and given them to Mrs. Ryan to give to Kyle. I’d fe

ry to give them to him myself, since he’d run away from me the last time I saw him … every time

m. It kind of hurt my ego. I wasn’t up for more fleeing. It had me checking my armpits. Did I sm

at? What was Kyle’s problem with me?

“Thanks for coming to my rescue the other night.” I played with my backpack, suddenly too emo

look up at him. “I was really scared, Kyle. You made me feel better—you made me feel safe.” I loat him, almost crying. “Thank you.”

He knitted his brows, tilting his head at my tears, his eyes soft and warm. Gently he murm

ou’re welcome.”

For a moment, we just stared at each other in silence. I was all emotional and still, even no

redibly awed by him—awed that he was back, awed that he was so in tune with my feelings th

ew when I needed help. I’m linked to you, Rain.

“Rain!” Nine called, breaking the trance I was under, our magical spell. I blinked, redde

ndering how long I’d been simply standing there, staring at Kyle.

A moment ago, Nine sounded impatient, ready to lecture me for dawdling, but now that she saw

s with she raised her eyebrows smirking and quickly backed away, mouthing, “Yum!”

“Wait, Rain,” Kyle gently grasped my arm, as though he thought I was going to walk away—a

uld. “I was going to show you something—this.” He pulled a ring out of his pocket. “Look, it’

urs.”



I smiled, getting a warm feeling. “It’s your CTR ring.”

“Yeah.” Kyle knitted his brow, staring at the ring. “CTR.” He gazed up at me. “I was wondering,

es that mean exactly?”

My smile broadened. “Our Sunday School teacher gave everyone in our class one when we t

ht—a CTR ring.” I smiled as he tilted his head, still waiting for me to explain what it meant. “It s

Choose The Right.”

Kyle studied the ring thoughtfully, and then grinned. “Figures.”

I zipped and unzipped my backpack absently, overcome with tingles. “You’ve had it all this time?

Kyle nodded, adjusting the ring so it fit his finger—though it didn’t really fit. “I knew it m

mething special. I used to wear it when I was with my mom and Roger—everywhere, really. I’d lo

a lot, but I couldn’t remember why or what it meant. I wore it on a chain for a while.” He stared

oment. “Choose the right.”

***

After that, I noticed Kyle wearing his CTR ring all the time. It made me feel … Well, I can’t des

feeling to do it justice. But it made me feel warm and good.

I thought it was incredibly special (not to mention amazing) that he still had the ring after all ofars. I knew he must have placed great value on it. It had been the only thing he had from home—th

ng to remind him of his past. It was an incredible sentimental piece. But I wanted to get him a nice

g—a really nice one. I worked extra hours so I could do it.

I was really excited when I was able to buy the ring. I could hardly wait to give it to Kyle. But t

sn’t sure how to do it. I carried it around with me hoping some great opportunity would arise. The

y we had a substitute in American Lit. and Kyle sat beside me.

“Tell me about our childhood,” he said as he sat drawing me. “I mean, how did we meet?”

“Well,” I laughed. “I don’t remember this firsthand. Mom told me.” I laughed again because

nny story, but also because it was kind of embarrassing to talk about in the middle of class … an

m. “When your family moved in Mom had you all over for dinner. We were only two, but Mom sa

re friends right off. Anyway, after dinner they couldn’t find us anywhere. They were frantic.

ally, they found us playing out in your yard. We were both running around stark naked.”

Kyle laughed. “That’s a great story.”

I loved to hear him laugh, to make him laugh. It boosted my heart, warmed it and made it all ligh



ttery. And seeing him laugh was the best. His eyes and whole face lit up—like magic.

This is the moment , I thought. It’s perfect .

“… I have something for you,” I told him.

He looked up at me from his drawing.

I unzipped my backpack and pulled out the small box. I was nervous for some reason as I hande

m.

He stared at the wrapped gift a moment, then up at me, looking quizzical.

“Open it,” I laughed.

Finally he did. Then he looked touched.

“Rain.” He stared at the ring, swallowing. He tilted his head at me, leaning close. His fingers g

ne as he softly whispered in my ear in a reverent hush, “Thank you.”

His eyes glassy, he silently put the ring on, then gazed up at me again, just gazed.

The bell rang and I was glad for the distraction. I hurried to get my stuff together, and then murm

him before making my hasty exit, “Choose the right.”



CHAPTER 20

I hadn’t been getting much sleep lately. I’d try—I’d go to bed early, thinking “Tonight’s the ni

d I’d plan to finally get a good night’s sleep. But then, it would never happen. I’d toss and tur

nk about threatening emails and paranormal computer messages and crank calls from hell … and

uldn’t sleep. And THEN when I would finally, finally, FINALLY manage to miraculously drift of

ve horrible nightmares about demons in dark hooded cloaks hunting for me, or dead dogs coming t

h! It was scary. And frustrating. And scary.

Other than my lack of sleep, life was going pretty normal, though. I mean, I didn’t spend it wor

out the emails or the dead dog. Well, I did a little bit, but I tried not to as the rest of my life was p

rific. I’d finally given Kyle his CTR ring yesterday, and Chase and I were finding time to be tog

spite his crazy work hours; also I’d forgiven him for not taking the prank call at Pizza Haven serio

cause well, the prank call wasn’t serious. It was, you know, a prank. So, things were good.

But then, Kyle stopped me in the school hall as I was heading for fifth period.

“Rain,” he said hesitantly, “can I talk to you for a second?”

My stomach knotted. “Sure.”

He led me over to the side of the hallway, out of the student traffic.

“What is it?” I asked, curious what had him so anxious. He seemed worried, and that ma

rried. What horrible news did he have to tell me?

“You know how Caitlin Klein is having that art exhibit at her gallery for me?”

“Yes! Your mom told me. Congratulations!”

Caitlin was the lady from the mall that day—the first day Kyle and I were reunited. She was th

y that had given Kyle her card. That day seemed so long ago now, but it had only been a coup

nths.

“Yeah. Thanks.” Kyle seemed distracted, rather than excited. “The thing is—well, one of the pai

it’s of you.”



I blinked. “What?”

I can’t express how surprised I was to hear him say that. I mean, sure he drew me in class befor

t was different. I was sitting right there in front of him, an easy target. But for him to paint me, tha

nning and thought. A lot of thought. I was incredibly touched.

“Yeah. Sorry,” Kyle said. “I wasn’t going to use it. But Caitlin—she saw it and … It’s already o

ll.”

“Oh.”

My emotions were suddenly all mixed up. If it wasn’t for Chase, and the fact he’d be hurt, I

remely thrilled. But there was Chase, and he would be hurt. He was jealous of the past I shared

le. Still, what could I do? Kyle said the painting was already on the wall.

“Well … that’s okay,” I said. “I’m not naked or anything, am I?”

Kyle grinned. “No.”

He backed away. “Well, I don’t want to make you late for class. I just thought I should warn you.

I couldn’t get my mind off Kyle painting me. All through trig I thought about it. I knew Chase w

e it the wrong way. That he would read something romantic into it. But I was certain Kyle didn’t

with romantic notions in his head. Kyle and I were dear friends, connected by the past. It touche

t he treasured our friendship as much as I did. I felt honored.

Still, it was hard telling Chase about the painting. Having to tell him killed. I waited until w

ished our homework, and then waited until he ate a couple of the cookies I baked for him. Ander that I waited some more. I waited until Chase asked, “Is something the matter? You’re acting ki

nny.”

Apparently, there was no more waiting.

I bit my lip. “I have something to tell you that you’re not going to like.” I handed him another c

fore going on. Then I proceeded with caution. I told him about Caitlin Klein, and about Kyle gett

play his work in her art gallery, and about the exhibit, and finally I told him about the painting.

Chase sat with his jaw clenched for a long time. Finally he asked, “Should I be worried abou

y?” There was a long pause before he went on. “I mean, he keeps painting you—and now it’s goi

in a gallery for everyone to see.”

“Chase, Kyle and I—we’re just friends. I’ll admit, there’s a bond between us. But—”

“But what?” Chase clenched his teeth. “He keeps drawing you—and that last picture didn’t lo

ugh he thinks of you as just a friend. It looked as though he thinks you’re beautiful—and he’s in

th you. So, what I want to know is, do you love him?”



I shook my head. “Chase, of course not.” I hesitated. “I’m not supposed to tell you this,

ouldn’t, but I’m going to … because I trust you and I want you to understand. Kyle has problem

s arrested before.”

Chase furrowed his brow. “Arrested?! For what?”

I shook my head. “That doesn’t matter. The thing is, Kyle needs help—and he’s my friend. So

ng to help him all that I can. But no, I’m not in love with him. He’s not what I’m looking for

yfriend. You’re what I’m looking for in a boyfriend.”

Chase was mollified … for the moment. After all, girls at school flirted with him like mad. He h

secure with his “desirability.”

Last year there was this senior, Courtney West, that was obsessed with him. She would write

rfumed notes, slipping them into his locker and leave him long, flirty messages on his cell phone. A

sn’t like she was ugly. She was the total opposite. Miss Beauty Queen. I was so glad whe

aduated.

But having to endure Courtney’s stunts let me know what Chase was going through now. It was

ff.

“Have another cookie,” I told him.



CHAPTER 21

Friday, Chase and I went to Kyle’s opening night at Caitlin Klein’s art gallery. I’d never be

ything like it and wasn’t sure how to dress.

When I called Nine in a panic, she was all, “Dress up, dress up, dress UP!”

So, I did—big time. I wore my long black gown that I’d had specially tailored last year for my bital social-gathering-affair thing. Chase had drooled when he saw me in it, so I kind of adored it.

om let me borrow her pearls. I felt elegant. (And Chase said I looked Rrrrrr!) So, I felt confident.

At the gallery, Chase was fun. He sauntered around as though he was a wealthy arist

owledgeable in art. He kept stroking his chin as though he had a beard, and murmuring things like “

eresting,” and “Notice the detail.” It was fun.

Kyle’s entire exhibit was amazing. And the picture of me … well, that was amazing too. Again,

angel—this time shining, out in the middle of a city street. It looked like New York, actuallyund, violence was taking place, but the angel (me!) was shining in the darkness, beckoning onlo

ward a light in the sky.

It was eerie. And beautiful.

“See,” Chase whispered as we stared at the painting entitled, Rain. “The guy’s in love with you.”

“He’s not Chase,” I insisted, unable to take my eyes off the painting. “I’ll admit, his pictures m

m that way. But he’s an artist . Artists make things look pretty … and romantic. That’s what they d

Chase kept his eyes glued to the painting, but he shook his head. “He’s in love with you.”

“Chase, you see the girls he hangs around. Do they remind you of me?”

Chase chuckled. “No.”

“So, see. I’m not his type, at all. I’m just—a link to his past.”

Kyle came up to us, wearing a suit and looking gorgeous. I about spilled my punch.



“How do you like the painting?” Kyle stared into my eyes, making me feel kind of wobbly.

Boy, he cleaned up nice.

“It’s wonderful,” I gushed. “Your whole exhibit is.”

Kyle’s eyes twinkled. “No Drake Meadows here, though.”

“No,” I said with a dramatic sigh. “Or James Dean,” I added, remembering he’d had many draw

my favorite actor at his mall exhibit as well. “But still—it’s really nice.”

Just then, Hanna Stevens, a girl from school, latched on to Kyle. “I love your work so much

aised, her eyes all bright with enrapture. “I love angels versus demons themes. I bought this paint

urs.” She showed it to him, all Look, see? “I was hoping you could sign it. I mean I see you sig

moky Shadows and I used to love that cartoon. So, that’s great. But, see, you go to my school,

uld kind of be cool—to me—if I could have your real name on it, too. You know, so when I’m

n show it to my kids and say, ‘I went to school with him.’ And show them your picture in our year

whatever.”

I watched Hanna gush on and on, slightly amazed. Hanna never gushes, ever. She’s usually c

iet—like, almost silent. Kids at school whisper that she’s a witch or a gypsy or something like

ey say she does spells and talks to the dead and has a crystal ball and can read palms, etc, etc, etc

mors went on and on. I think it was the way she dressed, all in black, with long, flowing sc

apped around her head. Also, you know, because she was so quiet and mysterious and didn’t see

k to anyone. I think that’s how she got that reputation—as a slightly scary person. But she sure w

iet or scary now. She loved Kyle’s work, big time. It had her all excited and chatty.

Hanna finally took a breath and noticed Chase and me standing near. Well, really it seemed shticed Chase. She reddened. “Oh, sorry, Chase. I didn’t—” She reddened further, getting all flush-y

e was having a heat flash. Or in love. “Were you two talking? I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“Hi Hanna, you didn’t interrupt.” Chase smiled all charismatic and slightly amused, like he kne

out her crush on him. Which was news to me. I didn’t even know they knew each other—well, I

y knew each other, but I didn’t know they ever like, talked , anymore, ever, or that they gave each

o-goo eyes. Chase had said back in the eighth grade they used to be friends, for like a month. Bu

said Hanna suddenly got all freaky and started avoiding him. He never could figure out why. W

unded him about it, totally intrigued, he’d shrugged, “That’s just Hanna, I guess,” he’d said. “SheI don’t know. Different. I don’t get her.”

It kind of seemed like he did now. Or maybe he was just glad to have a fan nearby, since, you k

were standing in front of a picture of me, his girlfriend, drawn by another guy. Maybe at the mo

needed a slight ego boost—though Chase wasn’t really like that. Girls fell at his feet all the tim

s used to it.

Kyle eyed the two of them a moment, then looked at me with a cocked eyebrow—question

used or intrigued.



He cleared his throat. “Sure, I’ll sign your painting.”

Kyle reached for the picture, but Hanna didn’t let go. So, for a moment they were both holding it

was like something linked or charged between them. That’s what it seemed like, the way Hanna

e got this weird look on her face. It was scary.

She tilted her head, turning white as a ghost. “I see blood—a lot of blood. Were you in an accid

r eyes grew wide. “No, attacked? Murdered!”

Kyle blinked, turning white himself. “Huh? No.”

Why’d she ask that ? But then the blood drained out of my face. Kyle had been attacked. By hi

d the attack been worse than he’d let on? Had he almost died? Almost been murdered like his mom

Hanna looked confused for a second, then quickly let go of the painting. I mean, dropped it, like i

fire. “I—you’re …” She backed away looking terrified. “I have to go.”

She bolted for the exit, lurching for it like she was afraid it was going to vanish before she got

e three of us stood watching after her with our mouths open. What the … ?! Kyle was still holdinnting she had bought. He flicked a look at me. “Do you know that girl?”

I shook my head, then blathered, because that’s what I do when I’m stunned—I blather. “Her na

nna Stevens. But no, I don’t know her, not really. I mean, I’ve never talked to her before.”

“Don’t,” he said. “Rain, don’t talk to her.” He studied me warily, then glanced at Chase. “You

r though, right?”

Chase shook his head. “Not really. I did in the eighth grade. We used to be friends. But then shepalm and freaked out. She never talked to me again.” Chase shrugged. “Well, until lately.”

Kyle eyed him curiously. “She read your palm? Why did it make her ‘freak out?’”

Chase shrugged again, this time with a smirk. I knew he thought all of that hocus-pocus stuf

key. “Who knows? That’s Hanna.”

Kyle ran his hand through his hair, then signed the back of Hanna’s painting as she’d asked. “M

u should find out what she saw,” Kyle said.

Chase laughed. “I think I’d rather not know.”

Kyle didn’t laugh. He chewed the inside of his cheek, handing Chase the painting. “The next tim

Hanna, will you give this to her?”

Chase nodded, taking the painting just as Caitlin Klein swooped down on us, leading Kyle aw

ociate with paying customers. Both Chase and I watched as she introduced him to a wealthy lo

uple who appeared as though they were interested in adding to their art collection.



“Well, the guy’s really talented,” Chase said grudgingly. “I have to give him that.”

“Well, yeah,” I said, like duh, “but what was up with Hanna?” It seemed Chase had already forg

out her and the strange way she had acted. He seemed to dismiss it as though it was almost normal

Chase shrugged. “I don’t know what’s up with her. The way she acted tonight—just now, that wa

y she acted when she read my palm that day. One minute she was all flirty and nice, the nex

opped my hand and told me she was feeling sick. She ran off then too, just like tonight.” He shoo

ad. “And she never talked to me again. Until last month. Then she started talking to me again, likever stopped.”

I lifted my eyebrows. “Why? What changed?”

He shook his head, lifting his eyebrows too, playfully. “I have no idea.”

***

We wandered around some more, and then—I saw them. Toward the back of the gallery in thei

le room was a whole different collection of Kyle’s paintings. Scary ones. In them were

rit/demons in dark hooded cloaks, winding through twisted trees, carrying torches.

The people from my nightmares!

My chest tightened. I took a step back, feeling nauseous and dizzy.

Kyle had drawn the hooded-cloak-demons? He knew about them? But that meant … they were re

The dim, candle-lit room whirled around me and I clutched for Chase. My heart pounded

rifying rate as dark spots zoomed in and out before my eyes. I reeled, gasping, knowing I was sli

t of consciousness.

“Rain!” Chase grasped me as everything went black.



CHAPTER 22

“Rain? Babe, Rain?”

Chase had me in his arms, looking concerned. He kept whispering coaxingly, gently, “Wake up,

in, wake up.”

For some reason, we were on the floor.

“Wh—what happened?” I asked. I didn’t understand. Where were we? Why we were on the

e room was dark, dimly lit by candles in front of pictures. It was spooky, sent shivers through me.

Something bad had happened, but what?

Chase gave me a small smile, though his eyes were still full of concern. He stroked my hair.

nted.”

“Oh.” My brain and thoughts were fuzzy, floating around unconnected. I heard his words, bu

dn’t make sense, didn’t mean anything. It took a moment for the information to sink in. I fainted . I

other to realize the rest, where I was.

I was lying on the floor in the art gallery. Yeah, I’d fainted.

Now I realized everyone was staring at me. It was embarrassing.

Kyle was here too, kneeling at my side. He was in a suit, looking nice. His eyes were full of con

ain, are you alright?” He handed me a glass of water.

I drank it, only now remembering what the paintings were on the wall—the demons. It made me

d shiver.

“Rain!” Both Chase and Kyle hovered over me in alarm. They sounded so worried, I want

ssure them, but I was having trouble breathing. It was coming out in short, ragged puffs, like whim

“Rain.” Chase held me tighter.

I was shaking. Really bad. I couldn’t stop.



“The paintings,” I gasped.

Kyle’s gaze jerked up at me with dread. He looked so, I don’t know—panicked? It made me re

at I was going to say. “They’re … scary.”

Chase chuckled, looking relieved. “No kidding. What’s that about?” He looked over at

pecting a punch line, but Kyle just gazed at me. “My paintings made you faint?”

Caitlin Klein laughed. “Hear that everyone? Kyle’s paintings are so scary they make young girls

aybe I should up the price.”

Everyone laughed, and went back to their business. Everyone but Kyle. He was still eyeing

oking concerned. “Rain?”

“I’m okay,” I said, trying to smile, trying to reassure him. He looked so troubled and worried.

t didn’t eat today,” I lied.

“Really?” Kyle gazed at me cautiously. He was watching me so intently, it was as though h

ing to read my thoughts. “That’s all it was?”

I nodded, letting Chase help me to my feet, though the world twirled and spun around me. I clu

ase, clung tight, not only because I was unsteady, but because I was shaking and I didn’t want K

e.

“Well, I hate to faint and go,” I said, trying to sound light and breezy, as though his paintings d

me with horror … but they did. I wanted out of the gallery—fast. Far, far away from those dem

tures of my nightmares. But I was still shaking and scared—so breezy was pretty much impossibl

Chase held me tight, tight, tight, like he was worried I was going to faint again any second, and

rried about that too. My world was still tilting and spinning. I stuffed my hands up his suit jacket,

get warmth, wanting to crawl up there and hide.

Kyle gazed at me, still looking concerned. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

I nodded. “Just a klutz—and, uh … hungry.”

“There’s food here.” Kyle gestured to the table full of fancy refreshments.

I’d eyed the table earlier, planning to feast on it later. But now it didn’t look tempting, at all.

useous, certain I was going to throw up. Why had Kyle drawn my nightmares? How did he know

demons?

“I think we’ll just hit a drive-thru,” Chase said, gently leading me toward the nearest exit.

Kyle followed us to the door. I could tell he was worried. I wanted to somehow reassure him. I

d. Only, I was still shaking and scared. I was even sort of scared of him. What does he know abo

aked-demon people? WHY did he draw those paintings? How did he know about my nightmares



“I—I’ll see you later,” I said.

I clung to Chase as we left the building, jumping at every noise I heard on the way to his

agined the cloak people trudging through the parking lot, carrying torches, whispering my name. It

bury my face in Chase’s chest.

“Rain, are you alright?” Chase asked for the hundredth time.

I nodded, my teeth chattering like crazy. “I’m just cold,” I said. And it was true, I was cold.

lled to the bone—with terror.

In the car, Chase put his jacket around me and blasted the heat. I snuggled up to him, trying t

rm. But I couldn’t. I just couldn’t. Kyle had drawn the cloaked demons. He’d seen them—exac

y’d been in my nightmares.

***

When I got home, Nine called. “How was the exhibit?” she asked.

“Uhhh …” I didn’t know what to say. I still felt chilled and scared. I was wrapped in a blanket,

the couch with my dog, Moo. I was watching some lame movie, only, not really watching it. I h

a what it was about, or if the characters were even speaking English. All I could dwell on were K

ary paintings. They haunted my brain, haunted my soul. Still, I stayed on the couch, glued to it, be

y parents were in the room, watching the movie as though it was fascinating and maybe it wasows. I just wanted to be near them, as close as possible, as though they could protect me—prote

m my nightmares.

“Was your painting beautiful?”

A shampoo commercial came on the TV and I watched with distress as my parents left the room

, heading into the kitchen for snacks. I wanted to get up and follow them, only I couldn’t move;

s on top of me.

I swallowed. “Yeah, it was.” I quickly told Nine about the scary paintings. “They freaked me o

d.

“Spooky. He had some of those at the mall that day too, remember? That day we first met him?

de a funny noise. “Kyle’s a scary guy.”

“Yeah … kind of,” I said.

After talking with Nine, I felt better. A whole lot better. I’d forgotten all about Kyle’s scary draw

the mall. That must have been where I’d seen the cloaked people before. The drawings must



ooked me so bad they made me have nightmares about them. That had to be it. That exp

erything.

I felt so much better I was able to go upstairs all by myself, though I took Moo, just for the com

mostly.

Up in my room, I was excited to see I had e-mail from Kyle. He didn’t scare me anymore. Curio

was back to getting my heart beating all wild and crazy.

His e-mail read:

Dear Rain,

I just wanted to make sure you’re really okay. You had me worried. Are you okay????

Also, while I’m writing, thank you for the CTR ring. It seems to really help a lot (now

know what it stands for). I haven’t had a cigarette in three weeks! Three weeks! I just lo

the ring, and think of you and it helps.

Another thing, I hope I didn’t get you in trouble with your boyfriend about the painting

Last thing—but most important: Are you okay?

Thanks again.

Kyle

I sat for a while unsure how to answer. I was embarrassed that I’d fainted. What a dork! I cou

ssibly explain to him about how scared I’d been. No way.

I did think about telling him about my nightmares, though, but then decided not to. He’d look

rried about me being scared by his drawings anyway, I didn’t want to add to his concern.

In the end, I just wrote that I was okay and sorry that I fainted and that I loved his paintings and

wled into bed, sort of exhausted.

***

During the night I woke freezing. I reached for Chase’s jacket as I had forgotten to give it back t

en we said goodnight. It was handily located on the chair next to my bed. Without having to actual

I snuggled into, but even then I was still shivering—iced from tonight’s nightmares. I slipped my o the jacket’s deep pockets. That’s when I remembered Hanna’s painting, because it was still the



ase’s right pocket. I pulled the picture out and immediately started trembling, remembering how s

nna had gotten tonight, her eyes growing wide, wild with fright.

Were you attacked? Murdered?

Kyle had been attacked, and his mom was murdered. Hanna had somehow sensed that.

Curious and frightened, both at the same time, I sprang up from bed, making Moo jump. I turned o

ht and gasped, a shiver running down my spine as I stared at Hanna’s painting. It was beautiful, r

me sort of angelic being was glistening in the forest. But the picture had all the hairs on the back

ck standing on end. Hiding in the shadows, all around, were dark ominous figures with glowing, si

es. They were hiding behind trees and boulders, watching the angel—as though ready to pounce.

My chest tightened. Why did Kyle draw pictures like this? Why?

I sucked in my breath, then gingerly turned the portrait over, reading the inscription Kyle had scr

the back. “We need to talk,” was all it said. Then at the very bottom, he signed his name as Hann

quested.

Hanna had seemed so frightened. What did they need to talk about?



CHAPTER 23

Our youth group was putting on a “show” as a service project. We planned to charge canned good

mittance that we would donate to our local food bank. The youth from other churches were

rticipate in the show as well—do their own acts or scenes or whatever they chose.

I have to say, I was excited. Our group had a terrific skit planned—and I got to dance in it. Yay!

I took ballet lessons since I was a little kid, and I was really good, but life never gave me

portunity to show that off. But with the show, I finally had my chance. Okay, so my part wasn’t bt, it was kind of small. (Okay, it was tiny.) But at least I got to dance—all by myself—and I got to

retty costume. For about two minutes, I’d be the star.

“We should get Kyle to be part of this,” I told everyone at practice. They all agreed that we sh

t doubted that we could .

“We’ll leave that up to you, Rain,” Lauren said.

Nine raised her eyebrows. “Yeah, good luck with that.”

I put my hands on my hips. No one seemed to think there was the slightest chance of me ac

cceeding. Well …

***

I approached Kyle cautiously as he was leaving third period. I totally, totally, TOTALLY wanted

be part of the show—the more I thought about it, the more I felt it would be good for him.

For days now I had shivered and pondered over that scene with Hanna at the art gallery, when sh

aked out. To me, it appeared she had gotten a glimpse into Kyle’s past—a flash or whatever. M

t. Okay, probably not. Probably there was some logical explanation to what happened. I didn’t hav

ugh, and what it seemed like was Hanna had gotten some sort of … something and saw a flash

le’s past. She saw blood, and Kyle being attacked, and she saw murder—his mom being murdered

When I told all this to Chase he took me in his arms. “Rain, you’re shaking. Don’t get all worke



nna probably read an article on the Internet about Kyle and his mom getting attacked. When he

ck, there was probably a huge story about it, and she read it and just all of a sudden remembered.”

That made sense; it did. Only, I hadn’t read anything about it on the Internet, and Mrs. Ryan had

e was trying to keep Kyle’s return a secret from the press. Still, things did have a way of leaking ou

I didn’t know what to think. All I actually knew was, Kyle had been through a lot and n

endship and support and being part of our show—something good—could help him. I really, truly

uld.

So, after third period, I was nervous, but determined.

“Kyle?” I said hesitantly.

He looked up at me with surprise. “Yeah?”

“Our youth group—we’re having a Variety Show thing and—”

He furrowed his brow. “A what?”

I played with a tear in my folder. “A production thing—as a service project. To aid our local

nk. And I—that is we—were wondering if you want to be in it.”

“A production?” He slung his backpack over his shoulder. “I don’t think so.”

I knew he would say that. Luckily, I’d come up with a brilliant way to get him involved w

king him get up on stage. “Well we need to advertise it. You know, get people to come. And I

nking it would be great to have a painting of it to display in our church foyer—you know, like a sig

Kyle bit his lip. “You want me to paint a sign?”

“Well, yeah.” Now the little tear I had been playing with was a big rip. “It would help us out a lo

Kyle ran his hands through his hair. “I won’t have to be in it? You swear? I’ll just paint you a sig

n you’ll say ‘Thanks’ and that will be it?”

I nodded, smiling because it seemed he was going to do it. “You just need to come to a couple

hearsals so you can see what it’s about.”

“Come to the rehearsals?” Kyle looked skeptical. “Couldn’t you just tell me what it’s about?”

I shook my head. “No. Not really. Besides, don’t you need to see what you’re painting?—to m

ok real?”

Kyle bit on his lower lip, shaking his head a little, but he was smiling … sort of. “You don’t giv

you? Yeah. Sure. I’ll come to some of your practices and I’ll paint your sign—but there bett

ickerdoodles.”



I smiled, unable to stop myself from jumping up and down. “There will be,” I promised. Then I

y next class.

***

Kyle came to our next rehearsal, but he didn’t bring his paints. Instead he said he would watch it

ough today, just to get an idea what our production was about. I was glad that we had already rehe

ot, so when he watched we were actually good.

I saw Kyle smiling as he sat back in the audience, taking in the fun. That pleased me to no end.

Every one agreed with me that my plan to have Kyle make a sign was a brilliant idea, and no

cause it was a sneaky way to get him to come and be a part of us, but also because we needed a w

people interested in our show. There wasn’t much point in putting on a production if no one ca

it—although I have to admit I was having a blast just rehearsing for it.

After the rehearsal was over, Kyle wandered over to me as I was slipping on my tennis s

ou’re a good dancer,” he said, leaning in close. “A ballerina.”

I blushed, pleased by his compliment, and the way he was gazing at me. But I saw Chase glaring

m across the gym—that sobered me up really quick.

Suddenly, I had an idea. A really good one. “Kyle, I brought Nine here tonight, but I have to

uple of errands,” I told him. “Would you mind giving her a ride home?”

“Nine?” Kyle didn’t seem to have a clue who I was talking about. I wanted to smack him upsid

ad. I’d introduced her to him about a hundred times. What was the matter with him?

“Uh—where does she live?” he asked.

I rolled my eyes. “About five houses from yours.”

“Oh. Well, yeah. Sure, I’ll give her a ride—if she dares to get into the car with me. People ha

actly called me a cautious driver.”

I smiled. “Well, why don’t we see if she’d mind riding with you?” I called her over to us. “Nin

ay if Kyle gives you a ride home?”

Nine gave me her are-you-kidding look. “No. I don’t mind.” Then she smiled up at Kyle. “D

nt to stop for ice-cream on the way? My treat.”

I left them to make their arrangements feeling even more brilliant, but Chase followed me out

. “I saw the way Kyle watched you dance,” he said. “What was he arrested for?”



I furrowed my brow, wishing I hadn’t told him about Kyle’s arrest. I’d confided in Chase to mak

e off Kyle, not be more suspicious of him.

“It wasn’t anything against a woman,” I informed him, knowing what he was getting at. I qu

anged the subject. “Do you want to come over for a while? We have Rocky Road ice cream.”

Chase looked tempted, but said, “Sorry. I can’t. We’re swamped at the shop.”

“Well, all the more ice cream for me,” I told him, giving him a quick kiss. But before I got into m

ase said something that made me cringe.

“I saw you setting Nine up with Kyle,” he said. “Do you really think that’s a good idea?”

“It’s a great idea,” I told him through gritted teeth. “Chase, Kyle’s a good guy. He really is. H

d some horrible things happen to him. Having Nine in his life—well, that would be a good thing.”

“Yeah, well, it’s not him I’m worried about,” Chase said dryly. “Would it be a good thing for Ni

I got into my car without replying. Chase could be so infuriating sometimes. Still, all the way hought about what he had said. “Would it be a good thing for Nine?” I started to worry that I may

de a mistake. A really huge one.

***

As soon as I got home from show practice, I grabbed the phone and dialed Nine’s number. I knew

d talked about getting ice cream with Kyle on the way home, but maybe that didn’t work out. Mayb

s home right this minute and I was worried about nothing.

“Hi Mrs. Butler,” I said into the phone. “Is Nine there?”

When the answer was no, I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling kind of sick. “Will you have her call m

on as she gets in?”

Then I paced around my house—for over an hour. Finally, I couldn’t stand it any longer. I cne’s house again. “I’m sorry to bother you,” I said. “But by any chance is Nine back yet?”

“Not yet,” Mrs. Butler said. “I’ll have her call you the minute she comes in.”

“Thanks.”

I paced around some more. Almost an hour later, Nine called. “What took you so long?” I deman

“Chill. We went out for ice cream,” Nine said. “Kyle’s really sweet. We had a nice visit.”



“So … everything was fine?”

“Of course,” Nine said, but it sounded more as though she was saying, ‘Duh.’ “Why wo

erything be fine?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” I said evasively. But what I was really thinking was—what do we really

out Kyle? I mean, really.

While I’d been pacing, waiting for Nine to get home and let me know she was still living, I’d s

panic, thinking about Kyle in a whole new way—a scary way. I really didn’t know him, not really

ymore, not since he came back. He kept running away.

Still, even as I’d paced, sweating, with my stomach in knots, I knew I was being silly—I knew t

d it wasn’t really that I started to think Kyle was “bad.” Of course I didn’t think that … not ex

ly, I couldn’t help acknowledging Chase’s point. It was a valid one, though I’d kept dismissing

til my best friend was alone with Kyle—for what felt like an eternity. Kyle had been arrested.

And even though Kyle had told me a lot of stuff about his past, he hadn’t told me everything—n

rst stuff—he admitted that. He was a mysterious, guarded guy. He just was. And I felt sick that

y best friend out with him—alone. Especially because now I kept remembering his scary drawing

fact he drew them over and over. There was something not quite “right” about Kyle. Something

ally willing to risk … for myself. But not for Nine. I needed her home, safe.

I didn’t say any of this to Nine, though. Instead I said, “You were gone a long time. What did yo

out?”

Nine sighed. “You. Rain, he has it for you bad.”

For some reason hearing this sent tingles through my body, and I instantly forgot all of that scaryddenly it was like—what scary stuff? I did know Kyle—I knew him now. Not everything of cour

s incredibly mysterious. But I knew he was a good guy. He’d taken Cheri to Bingo that night to

r up—he’d skipped a party to do that, turned down Misty to do that. And he put out his ciga

enever Cheri was around, though I could tell it was hard for him. He was a good brother, and a

rson, and a good friend. He obviously wanted nothing to do with our youth group, yet he’d agre

nt our picture anyway, just because I asked him to, and he’d come and checked up on me that ni

rk, totally been there for me—rescued me. Suddenly, I felt ashamed of the way I had been worryi

ernoon. Kyle was a good friend.

I shook my head about the he-has-it-for-me-bad thing, though. I shook it even though Nine co

me. “No he doesn’t. I admit, it would be romantic if he did. But we just have a sort of brother-

pe bond. I guess it’s because of our past together and him being taken away right in the middle of it

“Yeah,” Nine agreed. “It left him with a huge crush on you.”

“He doesn’t have a crush on me!” I protested. “Wouldn’t I know it if he did? He doesn’t hang o

y locker or walk by my house trying to ‘accidentally’ run into me. He lives right down the street,

rdly ever see him.”



“Well, he’s … subtle.”

“He’s not subtle! He’s just not interested—not like that anyway.” I decided to point out an

ring flaw in her Kyle-has-a-thing-for-me theory, since logic didn’t seem to be working. “Kyle

ls like Misty Saunders. Nine, Misty Saunders. I’m just like a little sister to him, or a … loyal p

g.”

“Hey, whatever helps you sleep at night,” Nine said. “But Kyle’s adorable and if he wants an

tle sister’ tell him I’m extremely ready for adoption.”

***

Kyle started coming to our rehearsals almost every week. He would stand at the back of the gym

nt.

It wasn’t that he was unfriendly. He was friendly enough. He would munch on cookies and join

n … a little. But he was very intent on his work. I felt somewhat guilty at all the effort he was goi

owing he was usually paid for his work. But to my relief, he honestly didn’t seem to mind. In fact

feeling he was enjoying it.

And it was nice that he was getting to know the youth group—find out what we were all abou

t we weren’t a bunch of … whatever he might have thought we were. And I was glad everyone

ting to know him, too. So they could see what a charming guy he was, because Kyle was an extre

arming guy—at least I thought so.

But to all of our frustration, Kyle would never let any of us see his work. That frustrated Laure

ost because she was pretty much the star of our show. “Why can’t we just take a peek?” she would

Kyle would always give the same answer: “It’s a work in progress. You can see it when it’s don

“Come on everyone,” Mrs. Green, our youth adviser, would always shoo us away. “Let Kyle wo

One evening after our rehearsals, I borrowed Lauren’s iPhone to check my email. Chase had h

ve the church early due to a job interview and he had promised to leave a message to let me know

went. If his dad’s shop got the job it was supposed to be a huge deal. Chase had been anxious, so

xious too. Only there wasn’t a message from Chase. Instead, there was a message from “Stan.”

s the guy that had been sending me all the threatening emails.

My heart pounded. I’m not going to read the message!

I had decided I’d never read another message from Stan ever again. They were evil and threat

d what did they accomplish?—nothing but terrifying me. I’d decided to just delete them from now



With shaky fingers, I hit the trash button and handed Lauren back her phone.

“Thanks,” I murmured.

Lauren was carefully packing up a wig from the skit, but she glanced up at me. I think my

rtled her. I think that’s why she actually looked up. Her eyes widened. “Whoa, Rain. You look

e you okay?”

My hands were still shaking a little. I hid them behind my back. “Um, yeah. Just tired,” I lied.

“Well, you look horrible,” she chuckled. “Go home and go to bed.”

Glancing at her phone, she started to walk, but then she turned back to me. “Oh, Rain, you

other message. I accidently clicked on it, sorry.”

She handed the phone back to me, still packing up her wig, and I took it, assuming the messag

m Chase. I didn’t even think otherwise. So, I was caught completely off guard, staring at the ho

rds.

Bile rose in my throat.

“ I see you dance in my nightmares—he sees you too.”

A chill ran up my spine.

Gasping, I dropped the phone, but—miraculously—Kyle caught it just before it hit the groun

ught he had already left the building. Apparently not. Now he was silently beside me, lo

ncerned. He handed Lauren her iPhone, his cautious eyes never leaving mine.

“You okay?” He put a gentle hand on my shoulder, immediately calming me. A little. “Yo

aking.”

Lauren flipped through her iPhone, looking both curious and concerned. “It seems like she

mething bad on my phone, but there’s just a message from Chase.” Lauren glanced back up at me. “

t Rain? What’s the matter?”

I whimpered. “A message from Chase?”

Lauren nodded, her eyes round with concern. She showed me the message. It was from Chase. I

Woot! Our shop got the job!”

I stumbled. Kyle caught me, steadying me as my world spun off its axis. With shaky hands I gr

phone from Lauren, studying it as though it was a snake. My email account was still logged in

re was no message from “Stan.” No scary message at all. Just Chase’s good news.

“I thought—” I started, but then stopped, clamping my lips shut. What I was going to say so

zy. I thought I saw a scary message. Ugh! Apparently I was losing it, ‘cause apparently there had



scary message. I mean, it wasn’t there now. Maybe it had never been there. Just like the message o

mputer the other night, the one saying, “We’re going to get you, Rain.” I was having delu

sodes or something. Maybe from lack of sleep. And fear.

My breath caught and I squeezed my eyes shut. “Never mind,” I murmured, handing Lauren bac

one. “Thanks for letting me use it.”

“You’re welcome,” she replied, giving Kyle a look that said, “Loopy!”

Lauren wandered off with her wig, but Kyle stayed at my side, looking concerned. “I’ll walk y

ur car,” he said. “Okay?”

I nodded, grateful to have him, though I figured he must think I was nuts. Still, I wasn’t sure I w

ve been able to bring myself to go outside alone.

When we walked out the church doors, Kyle stayed close, like his arms were around me. Only

ren’t, exactly. It just felt like it, somehow. I guess because he was so close, and I was kind of cli

him, a little bit, because when we went outside, into the dark parking lot, I felt even more frighten

though we were being watched.

Kyle must have felt it too, a presence. He stiffened. Then his arms tightened around me. He whis

my ear, “I’ll just take you home in my car, okay?”

I tensed. He did feel something. He had whispered the words hushed and guarded as though som

re near us and might hear. All the hairs on my arm stood on end. I nodded, unable to speak. I clu

m, terrified—though of what, I wasn’t sure. It was just a feeling, that was all. Maybe everythin

y in my head, brought on by the scary email, maybe, but my heart was slamming against my ch

rd it hurt.

We only walked a few more steps when suddenly Kyle whispered in my ear again, this time urg

ain, run to my car!”

We both took off running as though our lives depended on it, and maybe they did. I had no ide

art thumped wildly, my legs wobbling like rubber. Still I ran with all my might until my foot hit a

king me stumble a bit. I almost fell to my knees, but Kyle grabbed me, practically carrying me; in

a ways he did. He threw me into his car, scrambling in over me, right as a swarm of darkness

hing for us, knocking into Kyle’s car. It was like an avalanche of rocks, pound, pound, pound, pou

I covered my ears.

All around us—bang, bang, bang!

Biting back a scream, I buried my face into Kyle’s chest. He held me, stroking my hair, murm

ntly in my ear, “It’s okay … Rain, it’s okay.”

He said it over and over. But it wasn’t true! Something horrible was happening all around us—

ng, bang, on and on. Frantically, I started to silently pray. It was all I could think of to do, but ev



mple act of it calmed me a little. “Heavenly Father,” I whispered aloud, “please help us.”

Kyle squeezed my hand and tenderly looked into my eyes. “Help us,” he murmured.

Finally, the pounding on the car started to die off, then immediately stopped. When I could f

eathe again, I widened my eyes. “What was that? What happened?”

Kyle let out a breath. “Bats.”

“What?” I didn’t understand. I thought he meant wooden or metal bats, like for baseball. “Bats?”

“Yeah. Bats.” Kyle started the car. “A swarm of them.”

“Oh.”

From the glow of his headlights, I saw—finally understanding what he was talking about. F

nged animals. Hundreds of them. They lay dead on the ground all around the car.

***

On the way home, Kyle and I didn’t talk. I was in shock. I think he was too. He was pale and he

ing the inside of his cheek. It was comforting though, just having him near.

“You keep shivering,” he said, giving me a sidelong glance as he drove. “I have a jacket in the

u can put it on.”

I was tempted to; my teeth were chattering. Only I couldn’t bring myself to move. Kyle seem

derstand. At the next stoplight, he reached into the backseat and grabbed his jacket for me. He eve

around me, securing it tight.

“Thanks,” I murmured, but it came out so soft and weak, I don’t think he heard.

When we got to my house, he pulled up in the driveway, still biting the inside of his cheek. He ra

nds through his hair looking tormented. “Rain,” he said, “I’m sorry that happened.”

I blinked and tilted my head. “What?” I widened my eyes. “The bats?”

He nodded.

“Kyle, it’s not like it was your fault. It was just … bats. I didn’t know they did things like t

armed.”

He ran his hands through his hair again. “I don’t think they do.” He took a ragged breath. “Rain, I

nk you should be around me.”



“Kyle—it’s not your fault bats attacked us. And I like being around you. You’re good and sw

s just thinking that the other day—you are such a good big brother to Cherri, and such a good frie

. Thank you for going to volleyball that night even though you didn’t want to, and for paintin

ture for our youth group show, and for rescuing me that night at Pizza Haven when I was so scared

saving me just now. You’re always there for me.” I took a deep breath, wanting to say the right t

ke him understand—only what I had to say was a little bizarre. “Kyle, you’re a good person. You

u’re so good, sometimes it’s like I see you glow.”

Kyle flinched. He stared at me as I spoke, and kept staring after I finished. It was a long time befoally ended the silence. “Rain, you don’t see me as I am. I don’t know why—I guess because you

before.”

“And I know you now—I do, Kyle. You’re always helping me. You’re a good person.”

He ran his hands through his hair. “I try to be a good person.” He flicked his gaze to me. “For

ran his hands through his hair again, now looking out his window, into the darkness of the night. “

d you all that stuff I did. And that girl Hanna? She won’t talk to me. She’s afraid of me. She see

ming and she runs.”

Ironic!

“Kind of like you do to me,” I said.

He flicked his gaze back to me. “Yeah, but I do it for the opposite reason. I’m not afraid of you—

aid for you.”

I tilted my head, sort of stunned. I didn’t know that. “Why are you afraid for me?”

He raised his eyebrows. “Tonight you were attacked by bats.”

I slunk down in my seat. “But Kyle, you know you didn’t have anything to do with that—right?”

He looked away, setting his jaw.

“You’re a good person, Kyle. I know you are.”

How could I explain? It was more than all that evidence I had just given him, though that was a

s even more than the fact that to me he glowed. I just had a feeling —when I was around him

od, protected … most of the time. Okay, not always. Sometimes, I’d feel the total opposite. But us

elt the good.

“Kyle,” I said hesitantly, “in my nightmares you’re always trying to protect me, and when y

und, I feel safe.”

Kyle winced, staring straight ahead. “You have nightmares about me, Rain?”

Ugh!



“No, not scary ones,” I lied. “Just random bad things happen in my dreams, and then you’re th

p me—like tonight with the bats, and when I got that phone call that night at Pizza Haven. You’r

own Smokey Shadows, always coming to my rescue. It’s nice.”

Kyle glanced at me, seeming to want to believe me, but he looked unsure. I felt so bad lying; o

med I had to. He already felt he was scary or bad or whatever. No way could I tell him abou

ghtmares—that his paintings had caused me to have terrifying dreams. I’d rather die than tell him th

Kyle looked away, staring out into the distance, into the night. He looked tormented. “Rain …ams—they’re not like that. You know the things I draw—angels and demons? That’s what I dream

I swallowed, trembling, though I already knew he was haunted by demons. I knew because he

m all the time. But hearing about his nightmares now had the hairs on my arms standing on end.

I was overcome with the impulse to tell him about my nightmares, tell him that now I dream

mons too. But still, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I couldn’t. I didn’t want to make him feel wors

eady seemed to think he was a bad influence on me. I didn’t want to add to that.

“You’re a good person Kyle,” I said instead. I’d say it again, and again, and again, forever. “I k

u are.”

I stared up at him, into his tormented eyes. I bit my lip, then said it again, because it was amazing

didn’t seem to get it—but it was amazing and he needed to know, “Kyle, I see you glow.”

Again, Kyle winced. “Rain, I told—you don’t see me the way I am. You don’t.” He ran his h

ough his hair. “No one that’s done the things that I have can glow.”

I bit my lip, wanting to make him understand. “Kyle, there’s forgiveness.”

He flicked me a look. A spark of hope glittered in his eyes as he tilted his head, listening, earn

ening.

“God forgives. And he knows what’s in your heart.” I took his hand. “Kyle, you have a good

u’re a good person.”

Kyle linked his fingers through mine. “You keep saying that. And I want to believe you. I do, so

t my nightmares,” he took a ragged breath, looking tormented, “they say I’m a demon.”



CHAPTER 24

Finally the day came for the unveiling of Kyle’s masterpiece—our production put to canvas. W

hered around the covered painting, waiting expectantly. But when the painting was unveiled eve

od silent with raised eyebrows.

The painting was breathtaking, but … it was of me. I was up on my toes, gracefully dancing. Eve

e was in the background, mere shadows.

“Well, it’s a nice painting of Rain,” Lauren said snidely, most likely hurt that she—the star

ow—wasn’t in the painting at all.

Out of the whole entire production, Kyle had chosen to portray the only scene I had a significan

—the funeral. It was slightly embarrassing, being so thrilled seeing it, realizing the beautiful

ning through the darkness was me. Me!

“Well, Rain’s dance really is an important part of our production,” Mrs. Green said thoughtou did an amazing job, Kyle.”

And so our group relented. Kyle was a master. Suddenly, he was mobbed with praise. I waited

admirers drifted off to get brownies before I approached him. “The painting is beautiful,” I told

ou’re really talented.”

He looked into my eyes. “You’re talented.”

The way he said that, his voice so sincere, did strange, exciting things to my heart. I didn’t know

say. Kyle had that effect on me—he left me speechless.

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Chase glaring at us from up on the stage where he stood t

th his friends.

That quickly sobered my intoxication.

“Well, thanks for doing such a great job,” I told Kyle and quickly ran to contend with Chase.

But Chase didn’t really say anything. Not then, in the gym in front of everyone. He waited untre out in his car. Then he growled, “There’s no possible way you can say Kyle just sees you as a



er that.”

“Yes, I can,” I snapped. “Chase, I am his friend. The rest of you—I know you’re all nice to him

n’t think he feels he’s a part of you yet. I think he sees himself as an outsider.”

“He is an outsider.”

I folded my arms. “No wonder he feels that way. Chase, give the guy a break. He had to choo

aw something . So, he chose to draw me—his friend. And like Mrs. Green said, my part might be

all, but it’s an important part.”

Chase just glared at the road ahead, not saying anything.

“Maybe you should invite Kyle to do something,” I suggested gently, “to play basketball or some

t to know him and be his friend.”

“Why should I be his friend?” Chase grumbled. “The guy’s trying to steal my girlfriend.”

“Chase! He’s not. Trust me. Kyle’s adorable. He can have any girl he wants.”

Chase lifted his eyebrows at the irony of that statement.

“Except me,” I said in exasperation. “But what I mean is, he doesn’t need to sit around pining ov

and he doesn’t.”

Chase wasn’t appeased. “Kyle’s adorable?”

I rolled my eyes. “Chase, don’t be like this. You know you’re adorable, too. You have to know

rls at school are always panting over you.”

“Yeah. And you don’t like it.”

“Right. I don’t.”

“But you have an advantage,” Chase said. “You know I’m crazy about you. It doesn’t seem like

uals on that.”

I sighed. It always came back to this. Chase had issues. He always worried that he liked me morked him. I didn’t really know how to help him with that. There didn’t seem to be any way to ap

m. “Chase, I’m crazy about you too. You know that.”

“Yeah. But you want to see other people—right?”

We had discussed that once. But it had been a while ago, before Kyle’s return. It had been after

d a “talk” with me, saying in high school it’s not a good idea to date one boy exclusively. She ha

nds of reasons—experience, socializing, individualism, independence—her list went on and o

ough I sat listening to her acting slightly belligerent, really her reasons all seemed valid. The “talklly made me think.



So, the next day I suggested to Chase that we see other people for a while. But Chase got upset b

ggestion, and really, I didn’t think I could bear to see him date another girl. And besides, honestl

ly, there just weren’t any other guys around that I was interested in—only Chase. So, I too

ggestion back almost immediately after I made it. But it left Chase feeling vulnerable. Now he ha

head that I wanted to “play the field” or “scope out other prospects” or whatever.

And now—this thing with Kyle—it had Chase snapping at me constantly. I understood how he

uldn’t like it if a girl was painting flattering pictures of him all the time—especially if they got hu

art galleries and in the church foyer where everyone could look at them and say, “Hey, that’s Ryfriend. Another girl is always painting him.”

Heck, I couldn’t even take Courtney’s perfumed notes to him last year.

“Chase, I understand why you’re upset,” I told him. “But I really don’t think Kyle’s painting

ant the way they appear. He doesn’t have a crush on me. Seriously. He doesn’t.”

Chase scoffed. “And what leads you to that conclusion?”

I had so many reasons I didn’t know where to begin. “He’s never tried to kiss me. He doesn’t ca

go out of his way to talk to me. In fact, it almost seems as though when he sees me coming he run

her way.”

Chase looked at me as though he didn’t believe what I was telling him.

I flung my hands out in frustration. “Really. I’m serious. I think he avoids me, since I’m always

get him to come to youth group activities and everything. I think he feels like I’m harassing him.”

Chase shook his head. “That painting doesn’t look like he thinks you’re a burden.”



CHAPTER 25

The following Sunday I was embarrassed/proud/elated seeing the painting of me displayed

urch foyer. It was hard to miss, as it was set-up on an easel right outside of the chapel doors. See

nt my spirits soaring. It made me feel special, as though I was a celebrity.

Mom and Dad seemed proud too, though they were shocked as well since I hadn’t mentioned any

out the painting to them. “Rain,” Mom gushed. “Did Kyle do this? It’s beautiful!”

The whole congregation gave me compliments on it all day long. I never had such a great day.

Between each meeting, I would wander to the foyer to have another look at the painting. I was da

it, enraptured. During Sunday School, I claimed needing to go to the bathroom, just so I could run

bby and see the painting again. I wanted be alone with it.

It was only then, when it was quiet and calm, and no one was around to give me compliments,

s finally able to study the painting in peace. That’s when I noticed the signature. Seeing it madile. Smoky Shadows.

***

Monday, after third period ended, I went up to Kyle, wanting to thank him for all of his hard wo

painting. “These are for you,” I told him, handing him a gallon-sized baggie full of Snickerdoodle

“For me?” He looked surprised, then amusedly suspicious. “What, you’re trying to bribe me into

that Boy Scout trip?”

I tilted my head, “Boy Scout trip?”

Kyle eyed me like he wasn’t sure he believed my innocent act, but I truly had no idea what h

king about. He slipped his books into his backpack, then gazed up at me. “The one your boy

led me about. Going camping.”



Suddenly I felt tingles run through my body. “Chase invited you?”

“Yeah. I thought you put him up to it.”

“I didn’t,” I told him sincerely. “The cookies are just to say thank you for the painting. Every t

it, it makes me feel special. Like I’m the star of the show.”

Kyle’s amazing brown eyes stared into mine, all warm and soft. “To me you are the star.”

Butterflies danced in my stomach, tickling me. So, I quickly changed the subject to somethin

uldn’t make me blush. “You should go on the camping trip,” I urged. “The guys always have a

n.”

“Yeah. It kind of sounds like fun.” Kyle shrugged with a smirk. “But I get the feeling your boyf

es me.”

“Why?” My stomach dropped. “What’d he say?”

Kyle grinned. “Relax. He was decent. It’s just that I know he doesn’t like me drawing you … n’t blame him. So, it was cool of him. He’s a good guy.”

I smiled, feeling all light. “He is a good guy. You two could be great friends.”

Kyle grinned. “Somehow I don’t see that happening.”

I walked with Kyle out of class, but I couldn’t hold it back, not any longer. I would beg if I h

Would you go on the camp out—please?”

Kyle set his jaw. “Why are you doing this to me?”

“What? Wanting you to go have fun?”

“No. Getting involved. You have your nice little Ken and Barbie life. Why are you always dra

into it?”

I couldn’t help it. I could feel tears starting to well in my eyes. “I want you to be happy.”

Kyle looked alarmed at my tears. “Look. Don’t cry,” he said. “You want me to go on the campouans that much to you that I put up a tent and go on a hike—fine. I’ll do it. Just … don’t cry.”

***

I beamed at Chase as I sat beside him in the school cafeteria.



He raised his eyebrows, looking suspicious. “Why are you so happy?”

“Why shouldn’t I be happy?” I gave him a bagful of cookies. “I have a thoughtful, sweet, wond

yfriend.”

Chase took out a cookie. “True. But you had that boyfriend yesterday too, and you didn’t lo

ppy.”

“Didn’t I?” I shrugged. “I should have. I’m very blessed.”

Chase smiled playfully. “Can’t argue with that.”

He munched on a cookie. “I’m not complaining—because these are great—but what’s with all

ickerdoodles lately? As you know, your boyfriend is a chocolate chip lover, and since he

oughtful,” he kissed me, “and sweet,” he kissed me again, “and wonderful, maybe he could g

vorite now and then?”

I shrugged, feeling guilty. “Who knows? Maybe he could get a whole, whole bunch of them.”

I suddenly had major plans to make batches and batches of chocolate chip cookies after school.

my boyfriend was a chocolate chip fan.

***

Friday night Mrs. Ryan called asking if I could baby-sit Cherri overnight. “I know it’s awfully

tice,” she said. “But Kyle’s camping and my sister was just admitted to the hospital. I was hopin

d I could fly out and see her.”

I told her I’d be happy to baby-sit, knowing I could get Kami Myers to fill in for me at Pizza H

e was always trying to get more hours. “What time do you want me to come over?”

“Now?” Mrs. Ryan said hopefully.

“Okay. I’ll be right there.”

As soon as I was off the phone with Mrs. Ryan, I got right back on, calling Kami. As expected

s glad to take my shift. Then I hurried over to the Ryan’s.

As soon as Mr. and Mrs. Ryan made their hasty exit, Cherri and I popped popcorn. Cherri’s f

by-sit. We just play Wii games and do our nails—things I do with Nine, only I get paid for it.

“Do you want to play truth or dare?” Cherri asked as I polished her nails.

“Well, it will be hard for you to do a dare until your nails are dry,” I told her, not really wantin



y. I hate dares, and I don’t like baring my soul to anyone, not even a ten year-old.

“Well, then lets just play truth,” Cherri said. “I’ll start. How do you feel about my brother?”

I knew that was going to be her question. “I think he’s very nice,” I said diplomatically.

“And cute?”

I nodded. “Yep. He’s cute.”

Cherri raised her eyebrows. “You like him?”

“Of course.”

“I mean like him like him—like love.”

I started putting a second coat on her left hand. It was a little too soon for it, but I needed a ta

nk you took a bunch of turns.”

“Okay then ask me a truth—but it has to be about Kyle and if you’re smart you’ll ask me how I

likes you.”

I smiled. Ten year-olds are cute. “Okay,” I said. “How do you know Kyle likes me?”

“Because, come on.” She grabbed my arm, pulling me to my feet. She made me follow her upsta

le’s room. “We’re not allowed to go in,” she said, “so I’m just going to open the door.” She open

d had me look at the wall near his bed.

I stood in the doorway with my heart pounding, dumbstruck. The wall was plastered with drawinme.

“What do you think?” Cherri smiled. “You think he likes you?”

I chewed on the inside of my lip, my heart pounding. “I think you should shut the door,” I tol

herri, a person’s room is private.”

“Okay, well let’s make banana splits,” Cherri said. “We have Rocky Road ice cream—your favo

She skipped down the stairs as though she hadn’t just shown me the most astonishing thing of my

e.

***

After I sent Cherri off to bed, I paced the Ryan’s living room, wanting to go back up to Kyle’s ro



sperately wanted to see his wall again—get a closer look. But sneaking into his room, that would

ong. I would never forgive someone snooping through mine.

And Kyle’s wall, it was sort of like a journal. I didn’t see that before, when I saw it the first time

ot it now. Instead of writing out his feelings, Kyle drew them. So peeking in on his wall, that wou

e reading his journal. It would be a total invasion of privacy.

So, of course I didn’t do it. I didn’t go up. But I couldn’t go to sleep either. Thoughts of his

nced through my brain. He had drawn me over and over and over. What did that mean? If I didn’t m better, I would have come to the immediate conclusion he was obsessed with me. But I did know

d he wasn’t obsessed. The boy barely said two words to me unless I initiated the conversation—

sn’t because he was shy. It was because I was like a pesky younger sister to him. One that hassle

try to do good.

I was completely lost in thought, so I jumped about a mile in the air when Kyle suddenly

unding through the front door.

When he saw me on the couch, he stopped, frozen. “What are you doing here?”

“Your parents needed me to baby-sit,” I told him defensively. He definitely didn’t look happy t

. What he looked was anxious at finding me alone in his house. “What are you doing here?”

Kyle dropped his wet gear to the floor, not taking his eyes off me. “We got rained out.”

“Oh. Well, I should go.” I quickly headed for the door, but Kyle blocked it.

“You saw my wall, huh?”

It was as though he could read my mind.

I swallowed. “Your … wall?” I tried to act innocent, but my face was burning and I knew it w

d as Chase’s Mustang. “Cherri showed me. I’m sorry.”

Kyle looked slightly devastated. “And now you’re scared.”

I shook my head. “No. I’m not scared. I’m just tired. I need to go.” I tried to get past him, but he

out of my way. Instead he leaned his head back against the door, looking desperate. “Let me expla

It wasn’t that I was suddenly afraid of him. I wasn’t … exactly. But he was blocking me from le

d his parents weren’t home and it was the middle of the night and his wall was covered with pictu

. I just wanted to get away.

Kyle wet his lips. “Just let me explain.”

Without taking his eyes from mine, he pulled out a picture from his back pocket. “See this?”

I glanced at it, then furrowed my brow. It was my school picture from second grade. But ittered and worn thin, as though it had been through a war.



“I had this picture in my pocket when my mom took me,” he said. “I had it … always. It was th

ng I had to remind me of home. And even when I couldn’t remember home anymore, it reminded m

ame from some place good. I would stare at it at night—stare at it whenever I was sad.”

Tears formed in my eyes. “Kyle you don’t have to say anything else. I understand.”

Kyle stared into my eyes. “Do you?”

I nodded, wiping away my tears. “Too bad you didn’t explain this earlier. It would have saved C

ot of grief. He’s been running around worried you’re in love with me.”

I thought Kyle would laugh, but he didn’t. Instead he looked away, seeming sad. He ran his

ough his hair thoughtfully, for a moment looking as though he was going to say something, but th

dn’t. He gently opened the door for me instead. “Well … goodnight.”

Hesitantly, I stared to walk away, but Kyle gently grasped my arm before I left. “Rain wait, th

ore.”

I looked up at him and he wet his lips, pausing a long time as though uncertain how to tell me wh

eded to say. “You know how I said I dream about demons?”

Holding my breath, I nodded.

Kyle stared into my eyes. “I dream about you too—I did even in New York, when I was a

ways. I dreamed you were an angel.”



CHAPTER 26

After learning about Kyle’s reason for drawing me all of the time, I felt even closer to him.

uched by the significance he placed on that picture—and therefore, in a way, placed on me. My p

s like his CTR ring—a reminder of a past he didn’t quite remember—a good past. I guess that’

dreamed of the girl in the image (me) as an angel—it was his link to home. I felt honored be

rds … and closer to him than I could have imagined.

I thought it was strange that he didn’t seem to want to be around me more. I wanted to be aroun

ore. I wanted to be around him all of the time. I wanted to get to know him better. It seemed as tho

ould be able to do that, too. After all, he only lived a few houses away. And it wasn’t as though he

job at the auto repair shop anymore. He didn’t. He had quit a couple of weeks ago. Mrs. Rya

en thrilled, feeling it was a sign that he was adjusting to being part of a family. Also, she said h

de a killing from his work at the art exhibit. So suddenly he had more money than he could have

rking in the auto shop for a year. She was sure that had a lot to do with him being able to quit.

The Ryans weren’t the only people glad Kyle gave up his job at the auto shop. Caitlin Kleinilled too. It meant Kyle could devote more time to his talent. But even with all of his time

dicated to art, I was pretty sure it was less stringent hours than punching a time clock at the auto sh

med he should have been more available to socialize, but he wasn’t—at least not with me.

What I told Chase really did seem to be true. Kyle avoided me. It wasn’t that he didn’t like m

ew that he did. But it was more as though I was his petted, but pesky kid sister—one that nagge

much about doing good.

But today I had an idea. I rummaged through our hall closet photo boxes until I found an extra sade picture of me. The one Kyle had was falling apart. I put this one in an envelope and walked o

le’s, planning to give it to him if the opportunity arose. Maybe it was a lame idea, but it was the

e I could come up with.

“Rain!” Mrs. Ryan seemed pleased to find me at her door. “Come in. Kyle is out in the back.

awing—something.”

I found Kyle out back, doing just what Mrs. Ryan said—drawing. “Hey Rain.” He looked really h

see me, which was of course nice. But still, I felt a little awkward, coming over without a reason.ttered my envelope out to him.



“I brought you this,” I said. “Maybe it’s dumb. I’m not sure.”

He opened the envelope. “No,” he said softly, gazing at the picture. “This is great.” Immediatel

rted drawing it.

I watched him sketch for a moment, amazed how effortlessly he produced a work of art. He look

me. “Is it okay if I draw while we talk? I haven’t had a cigarette in over a month.”

“Sure.” I sat down at the picnic table, near where he sat on the garden wall. “I was wondering …

u coming to our show next Saturday?”

Kyle kept his eyes on his work. “Uh, no. I can’t. Misty has something planned.”

A light gust of wind rustled my hair. I used the crook of my arm to get the wild locks of auburn o

y face. “I wish you didn’t like Misty so much.”

That made Kyle stop drawing. “You do?” He stared up at me, watching my hair dance in the win

ched out, touching it lightly. “…Why?”

The way he sounded—it was as though this was important to him.

“Because I want you to like someone as wonderful as you are.”

“Oh.” Kyle went back to his drawing. “Well, that’s nice, Rain, but people as wonderful as m

rd to come by. I pretty much just take what I can get.”

“But you could get better! Lots of girls from school would love to go out with you.”

“Look, Rain, I don’t even really care who I date,” he said. “You shouldn’t worry about it.”

“But I do! I don’t like you dating Misty.”

He bit on his lip. “Okay, maybe I won’t see her anymore.”

I blinked. “You won’t?”

“Not if you really feel that strongly about it, but I don’t see what you have against her. She’s p

rmless.”

“Well, I guess she is if you don't like her a lot, but I think she could be a real snake if you do.”

“Is that what this is about?” Kyle smiled a little. “You’re worried that she’s going to hurt me?”

“Well, that’s part of it. She’s one of those girls that likes to get a guy to really like her, and then

m really bad.”

Kyle came and sat across from me at the picnic table. “You don’t have to worry about me getting

Misty,” he said. “Misty’s not a problem for me. I mean, my feelings for her—they’re not deep



ow? We’re just messing around.”

“But I wish you liked someone nice. Someone like Nine—or Lauren.”

“Look, you shouldn’t worry so much about who I date. Seriously. I don’t.”

“Well, you should,” I told him. “You never know, the person you date always stands the possibil

ng the person you marry.”

“Yeah?” He started drawing my hands. “Do you plan on marrying Chase?”

“Oh. I don’t know.” I kind of walked into that one, didn’t I? “We’re going to go to college

aduate and then see—but, yeah, maybe … if I’m lucky. But we’re going to date other people first

ow, make sure it’s right.”

“Oh, yeah?” Kyle looked up from his drawing. He didn’t seem as though he believed me. “Wh

u going to do this dating-other-people thing?”

Good question, I thought. But that’s not what I said. Instead, I came up with the brilliant answn’t know.” Then I gave a nervous laugh. “I came over here to talk about you.”

He grinned. “Yeah, but I like this better.”

I watched him drawing a moment. He did it so quickly, effortlessly. He was drawing me as an an

ain—only now I had my hair all rustled out in the wind.

I laughed. “Okay, Kyle, you say I don’t see you the way you are—I don’t think that’s true. Bu

finitely don’t see me the way I am. I’m not an angel.”

He gave a wry smile. “To me you are.” He kept drawing as he said that.

I stared at him, agape. I know he said he used to dream of me as an angel, but that was a long tim

before he came back and met me again. By now it seemed he should have realized the truth abou

etty much the moment he met me, in fact—I’m far from angelic material. I’m downright ordinary.

“Kyle, I’m not even close!”

He gazed up at me playfully. “What have you done that’s bad, Rain—ever?”

“Tons of things!” I assured him. “Tons and tons.”

His eyes twinkled. “Name one. One thing you did wrong.”

“I—” Blah! How frustrating. I sighed in exasperation. “Kyle, I do bad things all the time. I feel

nstantly. Like, I badger you even though I know I’m not supposed to.”

He grinned starting to draw again. “Hey, badger away.”



“You told me not to.”

He drew sparkles all around the angel. “Yeah.” He sucked in his breath. “If you haven’t noticed

ong about a lot of stuff, Rain.”

“Like me being an angel.”

He laughed. “Okay.” He put down his pencil with a teasing smile. “Name something bad you di

dn’t involve actually doing the right thing—like the badgering thing.” His eyes twinkled. “Som

ually bad.”

Ugh! Suddenly, I couldn’t think of anything. My mind was a blank. I felt so under pressure, I squ

t, “I cheated on a test.”

Kyle raised his eyebrows, smiling as he dropped his jaw. “Really?”

Ugh! “No. But I do things wrong, Kyle. I feel bad afterwards and wish I didn’t do them. But I’

rfect, not even close. Like just now. I was under pressure and I lied—see I’m a big liar. There!—

ong, right?”

Kyle laughed. “Not when you tell the person about it.”

“Well,” I reddened. How lame that I couldn’t think of anything. “I’ve done things wrong. I jus

essured right now.” Grrr! “I’ll get back to you on it.”

Kyle grinned, closing his sketchbook. “While we’re waiting, you want to come inside? It’s g

d out. I’ll make you my special hot chocolate.”

Nice!

He was being so accommodating. What had gotten into him? I didn’t have a clue, but I was th

wasn’t running away or avoiding me or anything like he normally did. He was actually invitin

ide—I know it was just into his house, but I took it kind of to mean more than that, like he was in

into his heart. Maybe it was because he told me about the picture of me he’d had all these

aybe telling me somehow set him free. Like he finally felt he could be totally open with me.

Kyle made me sit in his kitchen and get “comfortable” while he made me his special cho

ncoction. But see, I felt comfortable already, super comfortable—warm and toasty, light and

ating on a cloud, all that good stuff, because suddenly, I couldn’t get the thought out of my brain—

d had my picture all these years. That’s why he drew me and drew me and drew me. That’s wh

angel in his eyes. It was so sweet, I could have cried.

Still, I didn’t mind being waited on—especially by him. He put whipped cream on my hot choc

d then chocolate shavings on top of the whip cream.

“Oh!” I cooed, taking a sip. “I’m in heaven.”



Kyle smiled, sitting down beside me. “You talk about heaven a lot.”

I blinked, “I do?”

He nodded, then got serious. “You brought me here Rain.”

I was going to take another sip of my hot chocolate. I had the cup to my lips, but I suddenly forg

out it. Suddenly, my heart was pounding. “What do you mean?”

Kyle ran his hands through his hair. “You wanted to know about the angels? Why I draw you

gel?”

I put down my cup and stared at Kyle. My heart pounded, waiting for him to go on.

He watched my hands, holding my cup, then looked into my eyes. “I read your blog, Rain.”

I furrowed my brow, not understanding. How could he have read it? “What do you mean?”

He searched my eyes, as though he wanted me to understand, as though he knew his words woume out right. “I used to be so lost, Rain. But since I’ve been here and found you—actually, even b

ame here—when I was in youth detention—that’s when I started reading it—well, right before t

s all sick and feeling hopeless … then I read all that stuff you wrote. You were like an angel, my a

king me feel good inside when I never remembered feeling good before.”

I swallowed, too overcome to speak. “You read my blog?”

“Yeah,” he gave a nervous laugh. “Lynn found it—the dancer? She just looked up my name o

ernet—for fun. You wrote all this stuff about me—nice stuff. And you wrote about God—it wast time to hear about God. And you made him sound nice—like he might understand things. And it

think, maybe when my Mom died, He was there for her. Like you said, “Like a Dad welcomin

ughter home.’”

Tingles ran through my body. I remembered writing that—writing about my little sister, Grace

d in the hospital when she was only three weeks old. She had put up a good fight, trying to stay

t I knew in heaven, Heavenly Father took her in his arms and welcomed her home.

My heart pounding, I waited for Kyle to go on. “The first time I read your blog—it was that day

y I saved that guy—after Frank shot him at the convenience store.”

I jolted. “Wait, what? You saved him?”

Kyle winced. “No, I mean,” he ran his hands through his hair, “I called 9-1-1.”

He said it so guardedly, hesitantly. It gave me a strange feeling. Like the night when the dog g

er Misty hit it with her car, when Kyle tried telling me the dog had only been stunned. It was like

s feeding me an explanation he wanted me to swallow.



Suddenly, my hands were shaking. I put them under the table, so Kyle couldn’t see. I had so

estions swarming around in my brain, questions about Kyle. I wanted to know so much about him

dn’t understand. Right now—this moment—I wanted him to tell me everything, and it seemed he w

t just then, there was a loud BANG.

I jumped.

So did Kyle.

“Wait here,” he said. “Rain, don’t move.”

He ran to the sliding glass door behind us, as that’s where the noise had come from, right behind

unded as though someone had thrown a rock at the door.

I turned, following him with my eyes, my stomach twisting.

“What is it?” I asked as Kyle stood staring at the ground near the door.

Grimly, he answered, “A bat.”



CHAPTER 27

Kami Myers called earlier today wanting to switch work nights with me. So, all of a sudden—

day night—I was free. Only, unfortunately, Chase wasn’t. Since I was scheduled to work tonigh

de plans with his friends. Even though I knew if I told him I was free, he would change his plans o

ot, I didn’t want him to. He liked hanging out with his friends and he hardly ever did it … becau

.

Besides, the Old Movie Channel was showing back-to-back James Dean flicks, and Chase gr

enever I made him watch Rebel Without a Cause.

I would have called Nine to watch it with me, but actually she always groaned about it too.

nned on popping some popcorn and watching the movie alone.

Only, Cherri knocked on my door. She had a sleeping bag and pillow with her.

“Cherri, what’s up?” I asked. “Running away from home?”

Cherri rolled her eyes. “No. I’m supposed to be going to a slumber party. But my parents are

wn seeing my aunt in the hospital, and Kyle’s sleeping. He’s been kind of sick today, so I didn’t w

ke him. I was wondering if you or your mom or even your dad could take me to the party.”

“Sure. I’ll give you a ride.” I grabbed the keys to my clunker of a car that only works about ha

me. Seriously. I worry about it. It spits out smoke—and that’s on its good days.

I chauffeured Cherri the few blocks to her friend, Sara’s, house. “You said Kyle’s sick ?”

“Yeah.” Cherri hauled her sleeping bag out of my car. “Usually he’s a lot of fun, but today he jus

und sleeping. Also he has a temperature. I know because I took it. I tried to get him to eat, b

uldn’t. Maybe you can get him to do it,” she said before shutting the door. Then she stuck her

ough the open window, “’Cause, you know, he likes you.”

“Right,” I said. “Well, have fun.”

When I got home, I quickly threw chicken into the pressure cooker. If there was one non-dessert t

ew how to make—and actually, there was only one—it was chicken soup. I loved the stuff.



“What are you doing?” Mom asked quizzically as I was peeling potatoes like mad. “I was planni

ating up leftovers. Mind you, I’m not complaining, just surprised.”

“I’m making chicken soup,” I said. “Kyle’s sick.”

“Oh.” Mom raised her eyebrows. “You’re making Kyle Ryan homemade soup?”

I gave her a look. “He’s sick.”

Mom smiled, leaving the kitchen. “So you said.”

When I was finally done, my movie had already started. Not that I minded. I was busy with a ta

od deed. That was way more important than a movie. I poured some of the hot soup into a thermo

d my parent’s I was going to run over to the Ryan’s for a while.

They both just murmured goodbyes, neither of them commenting, but they both looked smug. The

n their loony heads that I had a crush on Kyle, but I have no idea where they got that crazy idea.

t doing a good deed. The poor boy was sick after all.

When I got to the Ryan’s house I wasn’t sure what I should do. Ring the doorbell? I didn’t wa

ke Kyle. But I couldn’t just walk into their home, could I? I decided I could. And I did.

I opened the front door, and then just stood there, frozen. Kyle was lying on the family room c

th a blanket over him, watching Rebel Without a Cause.

“Oh, I’m sorry to just barge in,” I told him, feeling like a dork. “But—uh, Cherri said you wer

d I thought you might be asleep and, uh—” I held up the thermos. “I made you soup.”

“You made me soup?” Kyle raised to his elbows, not seeming surprised at all that I had barged

house, but amazed that I had made him soup. “You mean like, homemade?”

“Uh—yeah,” I said, now feeling a little embarrassed about it. Had I gone overboard?

He stared at me a moment. “Thanks.”

“Sure.”

It was only now that I came all the way into his house. “I’ll put this in a bowl,” I told him, “andout to you.”

I went into his kitchen and prepared a tray for him. It wasn’t that big of a deal, really, what I had

made chicken soup for Chase when he was sick a few times—but then, he was my boyfriend. Bu

ain, Kyle’s parents were out of town. If I didn’t make the poor boy soup who would?

“Here you go.” I brought the tray to him. Then I stood watching Rebel Without a Cause for a m

Well, I should get going.”

“You could stay,” Kyle said. “ … If you want.”



“Oh … uh, okay.” I sat in the easy chair across from him.

“Mmm. This is good soup,” he said. “It’s the best soup I’ve ever had.”

I smiled, having to admit, I make a darn good chicken soup.

We watched the movie in silence for a while. It was nice, watching my movie with someone

dn’t groan about it, someone who actually watched it of his own free will.

Toward the end of the movie I was bawling. I glanced over to see if the sad parts were getting to

well, only to discover he wasn’t watching the movie, but gazing at me. Catching him staring lik

de me feel funny. Suddenly, my heart was thumping wild and out of control.

But before I had a chance to contemplate the moment, Kyle threw a pillow at me, and that, of co

s the beginning of a major pillow fight. We raced around the room, mercilessly pounding each

th pillows, until Kyle tackled me playfully, knocking me to the ground.

We struggled around on the floor for a while, laughing like maniacs, as Kyle tried to get my p

ay from me, but as he was above me his playfulness faded, and was replaced by somethingogether. His hold on me suddenly became an embrace as he drew his mouth down to mine.

He tenderly kissed me. And I have to say that it was the most gentle, passionate, wonderful ki

er experienced in my whole, entire life.

Overcome with guilt, I pushed him away.

“Rain … I’m sorry.” Kyle quickly let me go, looking every bit as horrified as I felt.

I scrambled to my feet and ran home wondering what was the matter with me. I had an am

yfriend. Why had I adored Kyle’s kiss?



CHAPTER 28

When I got home from Kyle’s, I ran up to my room.

“Rain, is everything alright?” Mom called after me.

“Everything’s fine,” I answered. But that was a lie. Everything wasn’t fine. I’d just cheated o

yfriend. I had let another boy kiss me, and I’d liked it … a lot.

I tried to get Kyle’s warm, soft kiss out of my mind, but it refused to go.

I picked up the picture of Chase that I kept on my dresser, staring into his handsome, smiling fa

ve you,” I told it. “I really do.”

So why was I so floored by Kyle’s kiss? Why did I want to run back over to his house and let h

gain?

I set Chase’s picture back down, and refused to get out my “Kyle box.” I had looked throug

ndred times since he had come back. But I’d kept telling myself it was completely innocent, that

ly doing it out of friendship—not because I had deep pining feelings for Kyle. But I couldn’t tell m

t now. What Nine and my parents had kept insinuating was true. I had a crush on Kyle.

Mom knocked on my door. “Honey, Kyle’s downstairs. He wants to talk to you.”

I wished I wanted to tell her to make him go away. I wished I never wanted to see him again

t’s not really what I wanted. It wasn’t what I wanted at all. I wanted to race downstairs and jump

le’s arms. I wanted to tell him, “Plant another of those amazing kisses on me.”

But of course I couldn’t do that. I had a boyfriend. An outstanding boyfriend. Any girl wou

illed to have a boyfriend such as mine. So, I couldn’t just follow my heart and fall into Kyle’s arm

uld I?

Of course I couldn’t.

I took a deep breath and went downstairs.

“Can I talk to you a minute … outside?” Kyle said.



I followed him out.

I sat on the bench on my front porch. But Kyle didn’t sit. Instead he paced. “I’m sorry I le

ppen,” he said. “That I kissed you.”

I bit my lip. I was sorry he kissed me too. Sorry that it opened my eyes and made me realize I

nk of him as a brother. That I had been crazy to ever think I did.

“Are you mad at me?” he asked.

I shook my head.

“Then why aren’t you talking?” He sat down beside me. “Why won’t you talk to me?”

“I … I don’t …” I stammered, not knowing how to express how confused I felt. His kiss—i

ned my world upside down.

“Look, I messed everything up. I know that.” Kyle ran his hands through his hair. “Now you’ll

.” He was silent a moment. “That’s good—I guess. But Rain, not because of this, okay?—you ve to stay away from me because of this. This wasn’t anything.” He got up and paced some more

t like you think. I just … kiss girls. It’s what I do. It didn’t mean anything.”

My heart sank hearing him say that. “It didn’t?”

Kyle shook his head. “No. See, for a minute I forgot you were you. For a minute you were just a g

I furrowed my brow, not understanding what he was saying. “And … what am I normally?”

Kyle shrugged, as though I should already know. “Rain.”

“And I’m not someone you would kiss?”

“No. I mean, ” Kyle ran his hands through his hair in frustration, “I would if you wanted me to

u don’t want me to.” His gaze cut to me. “Right?”

“Well, I have a …”

“Boyfriend, right. So, I’m sorry about that. I didn’t mean to mess with your head. I just … slippeminute. But I don’t normally do that.” He gave me an anxious look. “Don’t worry, I won’t do it aga

I bit on my lip, feeling I should be relieved to hear him say that. And maybe I was … deep down

o, it was so far deep and so far down, I was having trouble finding it.

“So,” Kyle looked at me searchingly, “do you forgive me?”

Do I forgive him? I was close to tears, but I blinked them away.

My voice hitched. “I will on one condition.”



He nodded, challengingly. “What?”

“Come to our show next Saturday.”

***

When I crept up to my room, I couldn’t sleep. I stared at my laptop longingly, too tired to actual

and get it. But I wanted it pretty bad just the same. I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep until I

out Kyle’s kiss. Wrote and wrote and wrote about it. But as soon as I finally dragged myself off th

d turned on my laptop, Chase called, flooding me with guilt and self-loathing and a bunch of

pleasant, but deserved, emotions.

On the phone, Chase was all happy and cheerful and chatty, telling me about the fun he’d had wi

ys, surprising me by asking, “Do you want to go get ice cream?”

I didn’t. Not at all. I was tired and it was too cold for ice cream. I wanted to stay home, curled i

mfy bed and write about Kyle’s kiss. But that was wrong. And bad. Even though really, I just wan

t out my feelings, not dwell on the actual kiss itself. I wanted to forget all about that , though I k

ver would, not ever.

But I figured it would be good to be around Chase right now, important. He could help me forg

s—at least for a little while, hopefully. He could help me think about him—Chase, my boyfrie

tead of Kyle and his hot, passionate kiss. I needed that, desperately.

So, I trudged away from my laptop. “Sure.”

I spent the entire time I was with Chase wondering if I should tell him about the kiss. I would w

e way, then the other. It wasn’t as easy to decide as you might think. Chase already felt threaten

le. I didn’t want to make him resent Kyle even more. Especially since the actual event had been a

ent for Kyle, apparently. He hadn’t even meant to kiss me. So, in the end, I decided not to mention

st not tonight. I would see how things stood in the morning, after I’d had time to thoroughly contem

y feelings.

Besides, Chase was in a good mood. I didn’t want to spoil it.

Instead, I shivered in the booth as Chase and I shared a chocolate-banana milkshake and a br

ndae. I loved them both, but it was too cold for both. Chase huddled close to me, trying to kee

rm. Normally, I’d enjoy his closeness—revel in it—but tonight it made me feel claustrophobi

ybe just guilty.

I needed air. And room. So when the pay phone on the wall rang, I hopped for it.

“You never know, it might be for me,” I said playfully—or tried to sound playful, like I was pu



ay from him as a big joke.

“Hello,” I chirped into the phone. “You’ve reached the wall at Scoops. Can I help you?

There was a lot of static on the other end. I started trembling just from that, a chill rushing u

ne. When the voice spoke, it was muffled. Still, I could understand what was said. I whimp

opping the phone and wilted to the floor.

“Rain!” Chase was beside me in a second, putting his arms around me, full of concern. “Rain, y

aking. What did they say?”

I clung to him tight, tight, tight, pressing my forehead into the crook of his neck. I couldn’t speak

imper, gasping out ragged breaths. “He—he said,” that was all I managed to get out. I couldn’t go

s too horrible. Too scary.

Because what the guy said was, “In my dreams we see you dance in a cemetery—soon we’ll dan

ur grave.”



CHAPTER 29

Chase tried convincing me my life wasn’t scary. That I just made it scary with an over-

agination. He said the call that night at Scoops was just another prank, that there was no way an

uld know I would be the one to answer the phone. It was just a random call and a wild coincidenc

appened to be involved in a play that had me dancing at a funeral.

“You said yourself the call was full of static,” Chase reasoned soothingly. “And the guy’s voice—

d it was muffled. He probably didn’t say what you think he said.” He stroked my hair soothingly

d me in his arms. “Just forget about it, Rain. It’s nothing.”

A week had passed since the call. I had calmed down. Pretty much. After all, everything Chase

s true. How would anyone know I was in a church play? Or that I was going to answer the pho

oops? I’d never answered a public payphone before in my life.

Still, I was a little jumpy.

Because I was still getting threatening emails. Sometimes. I tried to ignore them and not let

ther me, like Chase was always saying to do. But you know what? It’s hard to ignore messages thngs like, You’ll soon be dead . Or I’ll dance on your grave.

Those are scary. And mean. I would have called the police about them. Only, sometimes the mes

uldn’t be there anymore, like that time on Lauren’s iPhone, or the night I ran to the Butler’s.

aid to tell the police that, to tell anyone that. It made me sound crazy, and I don’t know, maybe I w

le bit. Maybe all my spooky dreams and the threatening emails—the real ones—were makin

ghtly delusional. I felt delusional. So, instead of doing anything, I did nothing. I went about my lif

thing was wrong with it, and I crossed my fingers that nothing was—but it was hard to believe it

s kept showing up.

Saturday afternoon a bunch of us met at the church gym to get things ready for the show. While

ting up chairs, Kyle walked into the gym. I was amazed to see him.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, not even trying to hide my surprise.

He tucked his hands into his front pockets. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

I hadn’t spoken to him since last week when he jolted my world with his kiss. I had assumed neit

knew what to say to each other. That was the case for me, anyway. “Really liked the kiss,” just d



em appropriate.

But I had done a lot of thinking since then. Of course, mostly about his sweet, tender kiss. But

me to a conclusion as well. It was that I had overreacted. After all, as he said, it meant nothing to

just kissed girls. That’s what he did. It was a habit, like Nine biting her nails. She normally do

en realize she’s doing it.

So, the kiss wasn’t romantic in any way. It was simply reality. Kyle was just a guy. He sa

portunity and he took it. I guess since I had never been kissed by anyone but Chase (and Kyleen I was eight on the ear) I had overreacted. Read more into it than was actually there.

Of course, I still felt incredibly guilty that I had allowed it to happen—and that I liked it so much

wasn’t going to happen again. So, I was able to sleep at night … after only a few hours of tossin

ning in guilt-riddled torment.

And the thing about me having a crush on Kyle? Well, I decided it would pass. After all, it was j

ush, right? What I felt for Chase—that was real.

But despite my misplaced amorous feelings for Kyle, I still wanted to be his friend. I needed e had a connection that went beyond my stupid crush. I didn’t want to lose his friendship just beca

s confused. I knew, in time, I would get past the crush. Meanwhile, I planned to lay low.

“Are you backing out on tonight?” I asked suspiciously.

Kyle shook his head. “I’m coming, but I might be late. I have this thing at the gallery. I’m suppos

there now, but I wanted to—” Kyle looked up, distracted as Mrs. Green and Lauren brought in

airs. Then he said confidentially, “Can we talk somewhere private?”

Suddenly, I was extremely curious. He hadn’t talked to me all week, but he came to the church

en he needed to be at the gallery, and now he wanted to talk to me in private? What was up?

“Sure,” I said, leading him to an empty room. I flipped on the light and looked up at him expect

y stomach starting to knot. “What is it? What’s the matter?”

His lips twitched a little, almost a grin. “Relax. It’s nothing bad. It’s just—I wanted to give yo

fore you danced tonight.” He handed me a small jewelry box with a gold satin bow on the top.

“A … gift?” I stared at the rich, velvety box with bewilderment.

He gave a nervous laugh. “Are you going to open it?”

I looked up at him a moment before lifting the lid, confused by the way he gazed at me. Then slo

ened the box. My heart rose to my throat as I gazed at its contents. It was a gold necklace wi

ricate pair of ballet slippers, their long elegant strings tied into a single flowing bow at the top.

nter of the bow was a beautiful, sparkling diamond.

I gasped. “Kyle—it’s beautiful.”



“Yeah, I thought so,” he said, coming to stand near me. “I thought it would look good with your

stume.”

Tears welled in my eyes.

“Kyle, I … I don’t know what to say.” I couldn’t believe he would buy such an expensive gift

. The thought of how much he must have spent made me feel wobbly. I was touched beyond words

“You don’t have to say anything—you seem to like it. That’s why I bought it. I thought you’d like

“I do like it,” I told him incredulously. “I love it, but—”

“Don't okay? I mean, yeah, it cost a lot, but I really wanted you to have it.”

I bit my lip, staring down at the beautiful gift. The gift I couldn’t possibly accept.

“Look, I know you have a boyfriend. This isn’t a romantic gesture. I just saw it and it reminded

t picture you had in your box. The one I drew of your ballet slippers.”

I looked up at him, knowing the picture he was talking about, and I couldn’t help it, I started baw

le seemed bewildered. He put his arms around me. “Are you okay?”

I nodded, still letting him hold me. “I love that picture.”

We just stood there in silence a long while, his arms tightly around me. It wasn’t a romantic thi

s a comfort thing.

Kyle had given me that picture when he was a sweet, innocent eight year-old. He had been glo

th goodness. And now, nine years later Kyle was giving me this necklace. He wasn’t innocent any

was tragically far from it—yet he still glowed … at least to me.

“Hey,” Kyle said, stroking my hair. “I need to go. Are you going to be okay?”

I laughed at his sweet concern, backing away from him as I wiped away my tears. “I’m okay. I’m

emotional. And touched by your gift.”

Just then Nine came bounding through the door. “Oh, sorry,” she said, looking from me to Kyle,

ain. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“It’s okay,” Kyle said, backing away. “I was just leaving.” He opened the door to go, then turned

me, his eyes full of promises. “I’ll see you tonight.”

I nodded, unable to speak.

Nine watched Kyle go, and then turned to me, looking at the box I’d snapped shut. “You know, y

t married to Chase,” she said. “You don’t have to feel guilty for liking Kyle.”

I wiped away a tear. “Nine—”



“You can date Kyle. It’s allowed.”

I shook my head. “No, it’s not. Chase is my boyfriend.”

She gave my arm a sympathetic squeeze. “Well, maybe you should rethink that. You’ve dated him

most two years. Rain, he’s the only boy you’ve ever dated. Maybe it’s time to try another flavor.”

I gazed down at the floor.

“Look, it doesn’t mean you and Chase won’t get married like you planned. Maybe you’ll try a bu

vors, and someday you’ll decide, ‘You know, I really love vanilla.’”

“Chocolate with sprinkles,” I murmured.

***

On my way home from setting up, I was still in a daze from Kyle’s gift. I wasn’t sure if I should g

ck. It seemed I should. It really, truly did. I had no idea how much something like it cost, but I kn

s a lot—way too much for him to spend on me, or that I could accept, especially because I

yfriend. Only, Kyle had seemed so adamant that I accept it, it was hard to say no.

Sitting at a red light now, I pulled the necklace out from under my sweater where I’d had it h

und my neck. Nine had had me try it on at the church, just to see how it looked. Only, of course, i

autiful and I loved it with all of my heart.

All around me people were honking. I was at a traffic light that was taking forever (and ever),

dn’t care. Humming, I played with my necklace, fancifully watching the diamonds glitter and sp

e magic in the sun. I was in a happy daze. But then— somehow—my necklace came unclasped

e that, it fell to the ground, waking me from my blissful fog. Oh no!

Giving a quick glance up, I tried seeing the traffic light ahead, but I couldn’t see past the truck in

me. It was carrying a bundle of long steal rods and warned, “Wide Load.”

I sighed in frustration and reached down for my necklace, but couldn’t reach it. Hastily I glanc

ead another moment, then unbuckled my seatbelt. Just as I bent to the floor—Wham! My ca

mmed into from behind, hard. Hard enough that it threw my car forward, slamming it into the stee

the truck in front of me.

Whoa!

Trembling and shaken, I looked up, then gaped. And gasped. And gasped and gasped. The stee

m the truck ahead of me had been rammed through my windshield, impaling right into the driver’

r ight into it. I gulped, as realization poured through me: If I hadn’t been bending over to ge



cklace, those rods would have bashed straight into my head … and killed me.



CHAPTER 30

“I can’t believe that happened!” The driver of the van that ran into my car apologized over and

nting that his passenger had gone crazy—totally insane.

The van was one of those community-issued vehicles—one that was rented out for small comm

airs. I used to see them at the library and mall a lot taking special-needs people on outings. I w

ver look at one the same again—it almost killed me.

Gazing at my mangled car now, I shuddered; still amazed I was fine—totally unscathed—than

le’s necklace. I clutched it tighter in my sweaty palms, holding it to my pounding heart, not

tening as the driver ranted about his wild passenger.

“I had to sedate the guy,” the driver babbled. “He just—went crazy. Started screaming abou

ather, then jumped on my accelerator. He’s out now, though—crazy bird. Out cold.”

The guy went on and on explaining, but I couldn’t focus on his words. I was still in shock. I aed. The knowledge swirled around in my brain, I almost died I almost died I almost died .

***

Mom and Dad were shocked when they arrived to the scene of the accident. They couldn’t bel

l planned to dance in the show.

“I’m fine,” I insisted, though the same couldn’t be said about my poor car. They took one look at

nt white as sheets. Mom took me in her arms, holding me tight. She started crying, obviously over

th how close I had come to a different outcome—one that involved a closed casket. She was shiv

bad as me.

“Honey, I think we should take you to the hospital,” she said. “Just to make sure you’re really alri

“Mom, I’m fine.” That wasn’t exactly true. I was a shaking wreck, but my body and limbsrfectly fine. It was my nerves that were frazzled. Still, I tried to sound unshaken because I couldn



in the show. I couldn’t let everyone down.

“Let’s go home,” I said, dragging my parents towards our sedan. I had tons to do befor

rformance, but more than that I wanted as far away from the accident as possible.

I didn’t even give my car a final look. It was too unnerving seeing the rods pulverized into th

ht where my head would have been.

***

Our show was a great success. And the turn out was unbelievable. The gym was packed. Lateco

d to stand.

“That painting was fabulous advertising,” Mrs. Green gushed. “Phenomenal!”

I raised my eyebrows, having to agree.

“Is Kyle even here?” she asked. “Did he see what a sensation he created?”

I looked around the crowded gym for the hundredth time. All night, I’d been wondering the same

t even now that the lights were on, it was still impossible to find anyone. The gym was packed

t with satisfied family and friends that were in no hurry to go home; they were visiting and chattin

ngratulating.

“I’m not really sure,” I said, again scanning the gym.

Sure, Kyle had promised to come, but maybe he couldn’t. Maybe he’d gotten tied up at the ga

aybe he had no idea of the fuss he’d caused.

… Maybe he hadn’t seen me dance.

The thought made my heart sink.

The magical necklace he gave me was tucked secretly under my sweater. But I’d worn it out wistume, letting it twinkle under the lights on stage. I’d danced thinking of him watching, knowing

aring his necklace.

But had he even been here? Had he seen?

I sighed, there was no way to tell.

Compulsively, I pulled the necklace out now, clutching it. The delicate chain hadn’t broken in m

I’d feared. It had somehow just come unclasped—and saved my life.



Still clutching the beautiful necklace, I went out into the audience to find my parents. They gav

rm hugs, gushing how wonderful I was up on stage, how proud they were of me. As they were s

odbye, I saw Mrs. Green grab Kyle. He’d been making his way toward me through the crowd

ing him made my speed up. He came!

“Your painting was fabulous advertising,” Mrs. Green gushed.

Kyle smiled at her, but his eyes were on me. “Thanks.”

As soon as Mrs. Green moved on to talk with Lauren’s parents, Kyle gave me an admiring smil

es full of warmth. “You were great.”

“Thanks.” I was still flushed from the high of being out on stage—of hearing the applause of

use.

“Oh … hi.” It was only now as the crowd shifted a little that I saw Aspen Parker was with Kyl

ought Aspen Parker!

She smiled smugly at my astonishment.

“Hi. Rain, right?” She held out her hand to me as though we had never met. But we used to be fr

the seventh grade—well I thought we were. It ended up her creepy older brother was paying

vite me over to their house. Paying her to let him hang out with us.

I only found that out because I overheard her in the PE locker room one day laughing about it wi

al” friends—the skanky, wild party girls that got high in between classes—girls like Misty.

Aspen was spreading horrible lies about me to them—and the whole school—about me another. Hearing the filthy things she was saying was like a knife in my heart. I’d really believed th

s changing and that we were truly friends. I couldn’t confront her, though. I was too upse

gusted. I ran to the nearest bathroom stall and threw up, and I never talked to her again—ever.

That was years ago and she never apologized. In fact, she laughed about it. So now, it took a

al of effort for me to accept her outstretched hand. “Hi Aspen.”

She put her arm around Kyle. “Cute show,” she said, and surprisingly she didn’t sound sarcastic.

“Thanks. Well, I need to find Chase,” I murmured and ran into the crowd to escape.

I didn’t know why it bothered me so much to see Kyle with Aspen. She was no worse than Mi

ess. No better mind you, but no worse. It was just frustrating. Why couldn’t he like someone

meone that could build him up, not run him through the dirt?

Then again, Kyle had brought Aspen to a church activity. Maybe he was building her up. Grudgin

d to admit that wasn’t such a bad thing. I supposed it could even be considered good. But Kyl

lking a tenuous path. I didn’t want Aspen influencing it. I didn’t want Aspen anywhere near it.



I found Chase backstage with a group from the show. He and his friend, Josh, were reenacting

ues Brothers scene from the skit. They had been so incredibly funny. They’d done an awesome job

When Chase saw me, he slid his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose and gave me a wink. I sm

ling warmed. That used to be all it took from Chase to get my heart fluttering—a wink. Or a s

ase was a good guy.

“Where to?” someone asked.

“Yeah, where should we go?” someone else said. And it was decided we would all meet at the d

op down the street.

We piled into cars and headed for the donut shop. We bought the place out, buying every donut

d. We sipped hot chocolate and pigged out as we relived fun moments from the show, no one wa

magic to end.

I was having a blast. But I couldn’t help thinking about Kyle, wishing he could be part of the fun.

s he doing tonight?

As Chase and I were leaving the donut shop, Hanna was coming in. We almost hit her with the

orry!” we both gasped.

Hanna smiled, her attention all on Chase. “That’s okay.” She beamed. “You didn’t actually hit me

lose call.”

Then her eyes cut to me and her smile dropped. She turned white as a sheet, stumbling back. A ga

und escaped her lips and she twirled away from us as though she was going to run.

“Hanna, wait!” I called, following her back into the donut shop. I knew Kyle had asked me not t

her, but here she was—it’s not like I went out of my way to seek her out. I just felt maybe, mayb

uld help Kyle. Only he said she was afraid of him and wouldn’t talk to him. In fact, he said sh

ay any time he came near. But she liked Chase—a lot, apparently. She wouldn’t run from him.

ured maybe she might talk to us. Anyway, I was going to give it my best shot.

Hanna winced when I called her, but after a moment of hesitation she turned back to face me. “K

ad,” she said flatly.

My stomach dropped. I grabbed on to the counter for support. “W—what do you mean.”

“I mean, he’s dead. He was murdered.”

“No,” I shook my head, shaking all over. I tightened my hold on the counter. “No. His mom

urdered. Kyle was just attacked. But he’s okay.”

Hanna backed away from me. “He’s not okay. He’s dead. And so are you.”



CHAPTER 31

Hanna’s words had me shivering all night. But it was silly. I wasn’t dead, of course. I had a hear

d a pulse, and a boyfriend that laughed at me for being so scared. Still, after we left the donut sho

d me a long time out in his car, trying to stop my shivering.

“Rain, Hanna’s nuts,” he kept assuring me, not understanding at all how she could get me so ra

Why do you even listen to her?”

It was because of all the other spooky stuff going on. Hanna was just the topping on the cake.

dn’t understand, at all, but still he held me tight until I felt calm enough to go inside my house with

lt down.

“You’ll feel better in the morning.” Chase reassured me with a kiss at my front door, but right the

o disprove his reassuring words, the phone rang, making me jump. Chase laughed. “Chill!”

I reached for his hand. No way was I answering the phone alone tonight. I dragged him to the pth me.

When I answered, the voice on the other end was hushed and hurried. He said one rapid, unse

ntence, then slammed the phone. He had spoken so quickly, I wasn’t even sure what he said—tho

s pretty sure.

Chase put his arms around me. “Rain? You’re shaking. Who was it? What’d they he say?”

I bit my lip, letting Chase hold me, trying to still my pounding heart.

“Who was it?” Chase said again.

I shook my head, knowing I was pale and shaky, knowing that’s why Chase looked so concerned

ybe he didn’t need to be. I had no clue what the message meant. Maybe it was a wrong number.

“I don’t know who it was,” I whispered.

Chase furrowed his brow. “Then why are you so upset? What did they say?”

I took a ragged breath. “He said—next time I won’t miss my opportunity.”



The furrow in Chase’s brow deepened. “What does that mean?”

I shook my head, sinking into the nearest chair. “I have no idea.”

***

As soon as Chase left, I sighed still shaky and chilled. His words, “Calm down, babe,” didn’t ex

ve me the reassurance I needed to actually “calm down.” I headed upstairs with Moo, f

andoned and alone. But before I made it to my room, there was a knock at the front door and my

ared.

Chase came back! I thought all tingly and warm. He gets it after all. I’m a terrified mess. I

mfort. Go, Chase!

I ran to the door and flung it open, but then my smile faltered a little. It wasn’t Chase at the doomfort, it was Kyle at the door with a measuring cup.

Seeing him standing there did strange things to my already pounding heart. Normally he avoided

all costs—but whenever I needed comfort he showed up from out of nowhere … or so it seemed

ment as I gazed into his warm, brown eyes.

I stared at him in bewildered awe, forgetting to say anything.

“You okay?” Kyle asked, probably because I was just staring at him, gawking.

I reddened. “Yeah. I’m fine.”

Obviously he was going to borrow something from my kitchen. Obviously his mom had sent him

t a grip, Rain. He wasn’t actually Smokey Shadows, forever coming to my rescue. He was just a g

est of ingredients.

So, my thoughts snapped into reality and took a completely different tack, shifting to wondering h

him to come inside and stay, at least for a little while—at least until my parents got home. B

ance of that happening. I knew he would run from me the moment he got his butter or whatever.

“You don’t look fine,” Kyle said. “You’re shivering. You look scared.”

For the briefest of moments, I thought about telling him about Hanna—what she said. It wasn’t

s afraid he would laugh at me about it like Chase; I didn’t think he would. I knew he wouldn’

at Hanna had said was scary. I couldn’t say it aloud.

“Rain,” he said gently. “Can I come in?”

“Oh,” I opened the door for him. “Yeah, come in. Did you need to borrow sugar or something?”



“Flour,” he said, gesturing at the measuring cup.

I cocked my eyebrow. “Your mom was out of flour?”

Mrs. Ryan was Miss Baker. She had over a year supply of flour in her pantry and I knew it for a

e was always giving lessons at church about emergency essentials—stressing everyone needs at l

ar’s supply of flour.

“Uh, not really.” Kyle smiled sheepishly. “It was just my excuse to come over and see if you’re o

Tingles washed through me. I’d been feeling so frightened and alone—and just like that, Kyle w

y door. He was my Smoky Shadows.

I dug my fingers deep into the arm of the chair beside me, needing it for support. “How did you k

s scared?”

Kyle wet his lip. “I told you, Rain, I’m linked to you. I know when you’re scared.”

Yeah, he’d told me that—he’s linked to me—but apparently I didn’t understand. “You mean, likve a bond, right? You feel close to me?”

He leaned his head against my living room wall, saying nothing, just watching me.

Okay, apparently it was more than that. “Linked to me how, Kyle? I don’t understand.”

He wet his lip, looking hesitant to tell me. “Like, when you had that phone call at work?—the on

ared you? I knew something scary happened to you—I just didn’t know what. And James Dea

ake Meadows? When I came back here—when I first came back, I’d watch your house and I couu dancing to Drake Meadows—not see it with my eyes—I could feel it. And so I loved it, I

ake Meadows’ songs because they made you dance.” He gave a nervous laugh. “I didn’t even

o the guy was until I came here.”

Tingles ran through my body, up and down. I stared at him, amazed … and confused. “You’re

ked to me? Link, linked?”

His eyes staring into mine, he gave a slow nod.

I took a deep breath, feeling dizzy. I’d kind of understood that, a little bit. But I kept not believ

o. Because it was too out there.

Tingles washed over me anew. “Whoa.”

Kyle was linked to me! Really, truly linked. I still didn’t exactly understand what that mean

parently, at times, he could read my feelings or—maybe, sort of—even read my mind. I’d susp

t at times, lots of times, but finding it out for real was overwhelming. He was linked to me!

I slid down the wall I was leaning against until I was sitting on the floor. I had to sit or I’d



rled my knees up to my chest, putting my head between my legs, taking deep, then shallow breaths.

Kyle silently watched me try to digest everything he told me.

It swirled around in my brain. Kyle’s linked to me Kyle’s linked to me Kyle’s linked to me.

ought was awe-inspiring yet terrifying, both at the same time. It sent wave after wave of chills th

y body.

After I’d had time to spaz a little, Kyle gave me a sympathetic smile.

“Rain, lets make cookies,” he suggested gently.

I stared up at him with a furrowed brow. He’d just told me the most astonishing thing in the w

ire world—that he had some sort of magic powers. Now he wanted me to act all normal abou

ke cookies?

His smile grew. “Making cookies helps you calm down.”

I blinked.

Wow, come to think of it, that was true. I tilted my head, amazed. How’d he know that?

His smile twitched with amusement. “Linked to you, Rain.”

***

It was fun making cookies with Kyle. He got my mind off anything scary—telling me one funny

out Cheri after another. I could tell he loved his little sister. I adored that. He would glow as he t

out her. It was sweet.

Any time I would even start to think about Hanna or scary emails, Kyle would start in on an

ry, so all I could really think about was, “Wow, I really like him.”

At one point, I reddened, having to look away from him, change the subject to something that ke him so adorable—which was hard. So I thought about old people.

“Okay, lets make a whole bunch of different kinds of cookies—big batches, for the people at th

ks home near our church.”

I figured since we were making the cookies to ward off scary thoughts, we might as well bri

me good vibes—do something nice for someone.

Immediately, we got busy and deep in flour, making every kind of cookie we could think of.



“So, you do this a lot, huh?” Kyle said. “Cover yourself in flour, making cookies?”

I made a pose, knowing I probably had flour in my hair and all over my face, as when I make a

okies, that inadvertently always happens. “What? You don’t like this look?”

He raised his eyebrows. “I do.”

The way he said it—so completely sincere—gave me the desperate need to look away an

mething with my hands, anything. I quickly started re-shaping globs of cookie dough already waiti

an.

Kyle silently watched me. When he finally spoke, he sounded reflective. “You were scared, bu

u’re making cookies for old people.” He gave his head a slow shake. “Rain, this isn’t helping me

image of you as an angel—you’re always doing good.”

He reached for a bag of flour, but opened it a little too aggressively. Flour flew everywhere.

I laughed. “Hey, you got my wings dirty.” I flung some flour back in his direction. And that wa

ginning of a major flour fight. I mean, major! It was so fun! And messy.

“Truce,” Kyle chuckled, coated with flour, laughing as he held me back as I was about to s

ndful of flour down his shirt.

By now we were both covered from head to toe. I acted concerned, “Do I have flour on my face?

He held my shoulder, scrutinizing me. “Wait. We missed a spot.” He smeared more flour acros

eek. “There. Per-fect.”

“Thanks!”

He asked for it! I stuffed my handful down his shirt and that started another war.

We had a blast.

Then, alas, we had to clean up our mess. But believe it or not, even that was fun. Everything wa

th Kyle. Everything!

I was having such a good time, I started hoping my parents wouldn’t come home until very, extre—which was astonishing for me these days. Lately, I clung to them, frightened whenever they w

und. When I’d heard they were going to a late-night marathon showing of their favorite actor aft

uth Group show, I had been more than a little distressed. But now I was kind of hoping they wou

me home for hours, I was having an amazing time. Finally, for once, Kyle wasn’t running away

. Probably because he knew I was scared.

After we had the kitchen shining and all the cookies mixed and formed, waiting for their turn

en, Kyle turned to me, suddenly serious. “Rain, lets talk for a minute.”



My stomach knotted. Oh …that’s why he stayed. He has something horrible to tell me.

Kyle made me his special hot chocolate and had me sit at the kitchen table across from him. H

ddenly so serious, it had me wringing my hands.

“What is it?” I asked, knowing it was going to be something horrible.

And it was.

Kyle watched me gravely as I sipped my hot chocolate. He leaned in close, his eyes watching m

ugh trying to read them. “What had you so upset tonight?”

I blanched, Hanna’s words from tonight rushing through my head. I didn’t want to tell him. I cou

ere was no way. Instead, I asked something her words made me think about—something incre

ghtening as well. “Kyle you’re always drawing me as an angel. And you say I’m like an angel to

angel … like not living?”

He tilted his head, eyeing me closely. “No, I meant an angel—like you’re good. Like you shine

s still watching me, staring me dead on. “What did you mean, not living?”

“Hanna,” I whispered. “She said you were dead. And that I was dead.”

Kyle winced. He rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands. “She said that?” He started drawi

apkin. “I didn’t want you to talk to her.”

He didn’t say it accusational-like, he said it matter-of-factly.

I wrung my hands, watching him draw, watching him refuse to look up at me. “Why Kyle? Why u want me to talk to her?”

Finally, he looked up at me, his eyes tender. “Because I didn’t want her to scare you. I can tell y

ared, Rain—I know you’re scared.”

“But,” I took a rattled breath, “what she said—why did she say that?”

Kyle ran his hands through his hair, then started drawing again. “I don’t know. She’s wrong, th

u’re not dead.” He looked up at me. “You’re going to be okay, Rain. I’ll make sure of it.”



CHAPTER 32

In the middle of the night I woke in a cold sweat, a strangled scream caught in my throat.

“It was only a dream,” I tried telling myself. Only it wasn’t, not really. Because I dreamed abo

accident, and that really happened. But now it was even scarier than the actual crash, than know

most died.

Now it had me shivering and scared all over again—worse than when the accident happe

cause in my dream tonight, I remembered something. I remembered what the driver told me aftcident. He said his passenger had been shouting about the weather—Rain!

In my dream, he shouted it over and over, “Rain! Rain! Rain!”

He’d been shouting my name!

I whimpered, remembering the driver said the guy made him stomp on the accelerator. Suddenly

d me quivering and shaking up a storm. Because now I understood—I was certain. The guy

rposely rammed into my car!

As that realization washed over me, I clutched my heart. In a flash, I remembered the messag

tten tonight. Now it made sense; it was crystal clear. The next time the guy got an opportunit

uldn’t miss it. He was going to kill me.

***

This morning I told my parents about my dream and the phone message I got last night. They

m too upset about it, not upset at all, really. They didn’t seem to think the two were connected

ssage or my car accident.

“Sweetie, why would someone try to kill you?” Mom said, seeming way more concerned abo

ntal health than the threats to my life.

“It’s because of my blog,” I mumbled, though I could already see this conversation was hopelessrted it wrong, ranting about my dream. Mom was going to call the loony bin way before she’d ca



lice.

“I thought you took the blog down,” Mom said. “And the police checked into those messages you

ting, remember? They said you didn’t give information that could be traced back to you—no co

ormation, no last names of anyone—this Stan has no way to find you or trace you.”

“And the police couldn’t trace him,” I grumbled.

I went to school not quite as convinced that I was in jeopardy as I had been last night or be

ked to my parents. They offered to let me stay home, though, but I didn’t see the point. I had tests to

d no phone at school—I couldn’t get weird, creepy messages without a phone or computer. That w

jor plus. Besides, it seemed like Mom wanted to take me to a psychiatrist or something. So I s

d said, “Never mind. The dream just freaked me out. I’m fine.”

Mom gave me a sympathetic smile. “I know those emails frightened you, Rain. They were scary.

oothed back my hair. “I’m so sorry you had to stop your blog. It was a beautiful thing to read ever

member all the nice emails you got? You helped a lot of people.”

I nodded, I had gotten a lot of nice emails—tons, from people I didn’t even know—telling me ho

og had brightened their lives or helped them find peace and Heavenly Father.

***

At lunch Nine let me use her cell phone. I called the Community Van company at the number the dd given me after the accident. He gave it to me for insurance purposes, but I was using it for det

rposes. I needed to find out who that passenger was that went crazy and started ranting abo

eather.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t give out that kind information,” the lady at the van company said when I tr

d out who had rented the van on Saturday.

“Was one of the passengers named Stan?” I asked.

“I’m sorry, I can’t give out that kind information,” she said again. “What I can tell you though

ispered in a confidential voice, “is we don’t usually rent the vans out to individuals. Mainly, the

ed for hospital purposes. For retirement home field trips and hospice care outings, things o

ure.”

“Oh.” I hung up feeling a little better, actually. Maybe the “passenger” had been some poor old

th Alzheimer’s. Maybe he really had been ranting about the weather, not shouting my name.

By the time school was over, I felt a lot better. Scary dreams were plaguing my life; I dec

eded to stop thinking about them during the day. Otherwise, I might as well curl up in a ball.



***

Tonight at work, I looked up from clearing off a table to see Kyle watching me from the entranc

urse, there was Aspen on his arm, clinging to him.

“Great,” I muttered under my breath.

It wasn’t that I wasn’t thrilled to see Kyle—I was. Thrilled and elated and all of that stuff. But I d

e his arm accessory. In fact, I hated his arm accessory.

When I wandered over to him, Kyle’s eyes twinkled. “Nice outfit.”

My uniform consisted of a frilly dress with an apron, and a floppy hat, no less. I did a little c

Welcome to Pizza Haven,” I said, trying to sound cheerful, though it was hard through gritted

able for two?”

“In non-smoking,” Kyle added.

I grabbed some crayons along with the menus, figuring if Kyle wasn’t going to smoke, he might

draw—or color or whatever.

“Can you take a break?” he asked.

He wanted me to join them? On their date?

“Uh, no,” I said, even though we were dead. (The restaurant, I mean—not Kyle and me. I wa

eathing last time I checked, and Kyle looked alive and kicking. Not to mention adorable.) “I alread

y break. I’m going to be getting off in just a couple of minutes.”

“Cool,” he said. “Then hang with us.”

“Oh—uh.” I walked right into that one. I’d only told him my plans because I didn’t want to ha

it on them. “Well, I’m catching a ride home with Kami. She’s kind of in a hurry.” That was the tru

sn’t a lie.

“We’ll give you a ride.” Kyle was acting innocent, but I got the feeling he knew I didn’t want

th him and Aspen together. He seemed to be enjoying watching me squirm.

“Great,” I said through gritted teeth, not giving him the satisfaction of refusing his invitation.

nted a third wheel on his date, so be it.

Back in the kitchen, Kami pounced on me. “Isn’t that Kyle Ryan out there?”

“Yep,” I said. “That’s Kyle.”



“Who’s that girl he’s with? He has a new girlfriend?”

Girlfriend ?—Aspen?! No! My heart sank just thinking about it.

“Girlfriend is a little strong,” I said, hoping I was right. After all, he was dating Misty too.

uldn’t be too serious. “He just likes to play the field … I guess.”

When I finished up my work, I clocked out. Then I trudged over to Kyle’s table and plopped in

at across from the “couple.”

“Have a piece of pizza,” Kyle offered.

I yanked off my hat and helped myself to a slice. Even though I worked here, I never got tired of

om had warned me that I would, but apparently she underestimated my deep, abiding love for the

uld eat pizza for breakfast and lunch and still crave it for dinner. Especially our “Junk Pizza.” The

ppings, the better.

“How’s the car hunt going?” Kyle asked.

I groaned, truly miserable about that topic. My car was totaled. Gave up the ghost. It was

unched up into a tiny, little cube. And now I was in agony!

“It’s hopeless,” I moaned. “Impossible. I thought my car was bad, but for six hundred dollars I

en find a heap. Nothing.”

I hated having to bum rides off people. Look what it was doing to me. At first I was going to ha

e home with Kami who was in a hurry and didn’t seem too thrilled about having to drop me of

w here I was, sitting around with Kyle on his date! Grrr!

Kyle looked sympathetic—about my car situation, not the having to endure him and Aspen tog

looked entertained by that. And the ride home was loads of fun, watching Aspen fawn all over

d although she had her window open, the smoke from her cigarette was making me gag. I co

ieve she would smoke around Kyle when she knew he was trying to quit.

Since I lived right down the street from him, Kyle dropped Aspen home first. She gave him a b

ooch before hopping out of the car. Then, I swear, she gave me a dirty look.

“So, you’re dating Aspen now?” I asked on our way home.

Kyle shrugged. “We’re just messing around.”

I raised an eyebrow. “How does Misty feel about that?”

He gave me a sidelong glance. “ … We broke up.”

I widened my eyes. “You broke up with her?”

“That’s what you wanted, right?”



I was amazed that he would stop seeing her just because I asked him to. As crazy as it was, he se

be willing to do anything I asked. His having my second grade picture all of those years seemed to

a lot of power over him, besides, you know, linkage. It was weird … but nice.

“But now you’re with Aspen. She’s the same as Misty,” I told him as he pulled up in front o

use. “You missed my point. I want you to be with someone nice.”

Kyle rubbed his face in frustration. “Why do you care so much who I date?”

“Because you’ve been through a lot, Kyle. You need someone nice who’ll be a good influen

u.”

“I don’t need a date for that—I have you for that.”

“But I want you to date someone as wonderful as you. You’re a great guy. You deserve … Nine.”

Kyle rested his head on the steering wheel, seeming tired of our conversation. He gazed up a

king seriously. “Rain, Nine’s great. She is. But I’m kind of hard on girls. If she dates me, she’ll on

rt. Why do you want that?”

I furrowed my brow. “Why are you hard on girls?”

“I don’t mean to be. But they want love. I can’t give them that.”

I gazed at him in the dark, wondering about his past. Had too many horrible things happened to

couldn’t love? “So you always break the girl’s heart? Hasn’t there ever been a girl that you

out—one that could hurt you?”

“Yeah,” Kyle said. “There’s one girl. She could break my heart. She could blow me away….”

Suddenly I felt sick. “Is it Lynn?”

“What?” He looked up at me with surprise.

“Lynn. The dancer that you used to live with before you came here. Is that the girl you care about

Kyle sat gazing at me in amazement, not saying anything. Then he shook his head. “No,” he said s

s not Lynn.”

Mom came out of the house and stood on the porch, signaling that it was time to come in. I tr

nore her—pretend I didn’t see her. I wanted to sit with Kyle and talk all night.

But Kyle seemed tired. “I think your mom wants you,” he said.

“Yeah. I think so too,” I murmured and slipped out of his car. What else could I do?

Mom gave me a wave from the porch and went inside, her mission accomplished. I wasn’t lingerboy’s car. But right then—all of a sudden—I thought I saw a shadow or something move out i



rner of my yard. It was so dark, it was hard to tell. But I froze, my heart pounding so hard again

est I was sure it was going to break my ribs. Kyle must have seen the shadow too, because all

dden, he was out of his car and beside me.

“I’ll take you to Chase’s,” he said, gently placing his hand on my shoulder. “Didn’t you say you

ng to go there to study?”

“Kyle, there was—”

“No there wasn’t,” he said, his voice reassuring. “There wasn’t, Rain. I could just tell you

ared.” He opened the car door for me and helped me in. “You should probably call your mom.”

He handed me his phone, but I only gripped it, contemplating what just happened—still amazed.

ew I was scared because you’re linked to me?”

Kyle nodded, his eyes on me intently, watching me. He licked his lips, seeming hesitant to te

ore but apparently thinking I should know. Finally he said, “Rain, I don’t mean to scare you, I don

I think you’re linked to me too. That’s why I tried to stay away from you. My life—it’s scary. I

nt that for you.” He ran his hands through his hair. “I don’t want to get you involved.”

Phenomenal thoughts swirled around in my brain. He’s linked to me. I’m linked to him . It

lly make sense. I didn’t understand. How? Why? The questions went on and on, but what I said

yle, I’m already involved—totally involved. I care about you so much.”

He set his jaw, not saying anything, just taking ragged breaths. “I wish you weren’t,” he said softl

We were silent a long time. I was contemplating the things he said in the past—thinking he mu

ong. I wasn’t linked to him. I couldn’t read his mind or his thoughts or his feelings. Kyle was a mme. I wouldn’t know if he was scared, the only way I even knew he had problems was because h

about his past. And he drew demons.

I swallowed. “Are you sure I’m linked to you?”

He raised his eyebrows. “Maybe.” He ran his hands through his hair. “I hope not. Rain, I really

t.”

I wasn’t linked to him, I knew that. I wasn’t. But apparently, that was a good thing. He thougyway. For some reason, he didn’t want me to be linked to him. So, I decided to tell him, reassure

t … then another thought occurred to me.

I tilted my head, suddenly in a panic. “Why did you come to Pizza Haven tonight if you’re try

y away from me?” It just dawned on me that he’d had an ulterior motive. He’d come to check o

omething was in my yard just now, wasn’t it?”

Kyle sat silent a moment, then shook his head. “I don’t think so—maybe. I don’t know.” He starte

. “I’m going to take you to Chase’s okay? Call your mom and let her know.”



As we started to drive away, I glanced back at my house. A chill ran through me. I was a

sitive I saw a shadow-like figure move out in my yard.

“Rain,” Kyle said gently, “you’re safe.”



CHAPTER 33

After Kyle and I had our baffling talk in the car, he dropped me off at Chase’s house to study. C

s more than an awesome boyfriend, he was my math tutor. I couldn’t pass trig without him.

I looked up in exasperation from a problem I’d been working on for the last ten minutes. Ther

actically a hole in the middle of my paper where it had worn thin from all my erasing.

“I hate this.” I slammed my pencil down in exasperation. “I’m going to flunk.”

“You’re not going to flunk,” Chase said soothingly. “You just need a break.”

He kissed me a little, and his kisses were soft, and warm, and I started to tingle. But then—I co

p it—I started to think about Kyle. About his kiss. Feeling guilty, I pushed Chase away.

“I really need to study,” I told him.

When I got home from Chase’s I started crying. I hated feeling guilty. And I hated not knowing wh

In the middle of my bawling, Nine called. Up until now I hadn’t told her about Kyle’s kiss. I cou

ad felt too guilty about it. But now, suddenly I was spilling my guts.

“Well,” Nine said thoughtfully after I told her everything, “remember when you told Chase you th

u guys should see other people? But then afterwards you said it was dumb because you w

erested in any other guys? Well … now you are.”

“But I shouldn’t be! Chase is perfect.”

“Chase has a lot going for him, I’ll give you that,” Nine said. “But so does Kyle. And you like

u can’t deny that, Rain. Give him a chance.”

“But it’s just a crush,” I groaned. “I don’t want to throw away true love for a stupid crush.”

Nine was quiet for a moment, summoning up her great words of wisdom. “If you and Chase are

ant to be together it will work out—later. After you’ve both dated other people and actually knowve is—and isn’t. Then, who knows, maybe you guys will say, ‘Hey, now we know. We’re perfec



ch other.’ And you’ll get married and live happily ever after.”

I didn’t say anything. What could I say? My parents were always stressing that, my church was a

essing that, everyone was always stressing that. I knew there wasn’t really any argument to the

t my heart said I couldn’t live without Chase. Only, I couldn’t trust my heart any more … beca

nted Kyle too.

“Rain,” Nine stressed again, “you don’t have to feel guilty for liking Kyle.”

I sighed. “I’m not even his type. Now he’s dating Aspen Parker.”

Nine sighed too. “I noticed.”

“So what am I supposed to do? I’m supposed to break up with Chase and be alone?”

Hearing Nine’s answer was kind of brutal, mostly because it was true. “Is it really fair to stay

ase if you’re interested in another guy?”

That was exactly what I’d been wondering ever since Kyle’s kiss.



CHAPTER 34

It was after eleven when I finished talking with Nine. I was tired. Weary from the heavy load

ddenly weighed on my mind. I didn’t like realizing Nine was right. That I should let Chase go. M

ugh, just because it would hurt him. I didn’t think I could do that.

Almost immediately after I hung up from talking with Nine, the phone rang. I grabbed it on th

g, thinking it was Nine calling back with more pearls of wisdom.

But it wasn’t Nine on the phone—that was for sure.

When I answered, the person on the other end called me a bunch of horrible, filthy names and

ng up. My heart raced frantically, for a moment, but then began to calm down. The call was mean;

t it didn’t sound like it came from demons. It sounded like it came from a person. A mean person.

I checked caller I.D., but I had answered too quickly. It didn’t give a number.

“Doesn’t matter anyway,” I muttered. I knew who it was. Aspen Parker.

Only moments earlier I had been dead tired. But now I was wide-awake. What kind of crazy, p

t was Aspen?—calling me in the middle of the night? Calling me filthy names? I cringed realizin

s the new influence in Kyle’s life. She made Misty look like Snow White.

I hopped out of bed and got dressed. Of course now, it was well after eleven, but I wasn’t able

t stop me. I charged over to Kyle’s. When I got there, all of the lights were off at his house. Even

droom. Still, I didn’t let that stop me either.

Hoping maybe he had just recently crawled into bed, and wasn’t quite asleep yet, I picked up a c

tiny rocks and threw them at his window. When the tiny rocks didn’t work, I looked around for a

gger ones, but those didn’t work either. I knew I should give up. I was being crazy. But I really, r

nted to talk to Kyle, let him know what a scary psychopath he was dating. Not that I didn’t rea

s being pretty psychotic myself. But, hey, I had a good reason … right?

“Okay. Last try,” I muttered to myself.

I got a rather big rock compared to what I had been throwing, and since it was my last chance,



lly, really wanted to talk to Kyle, I threw it maybe somewhat inappropriately hard. It banged ag

window loud enough to wake the neighbors. It was so loud, I almost ran home.

Kyle came to his window almost immediately. Unfortunately, so did his parents. I wanted the g

open up and swallow me.

I wasn’t sure what to do. It was awfully dark out. Had they saw that it was me? Probably not. I th

out running home. It seemed like the wisest thing to do, even if they had seen me.

But I didn’t run. Instead, I just stood frozen where I was and Mr. and Mrs. Ryan came downsta

ir robes. They opened their front door. “Rain?” Mrs. Ryan called, sounding bewildered—and a

rried for me.

“Hey Mrs. Ryan,” I croaked, limping over to the porch. “Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to wake

en I saw Kyle. He was standing behind his parents, grinning. “I—uh, wanted to talk to Kyle.”

“Well, come in,” Mrs. Ryan said.

All three of them had bed hair from being woken. I felt so ridiculous, I thought I might die on them embarrassment. Still, what could I do? Say, “No, that’s okay. It’s no big deal. I’ll just talk to

morrow.” Then skip home as though I had woken them for no important reason?

I couldn’t do that. Instead, I hobbled in, giving Kyle-the-Grinner a dirty look.

“Would you like some hot chocolate?” Mrs. Ryan offered.

“Oh. No, thanks,” I said, giving a little laugh, mostly because I was embarrassed, but also becau

s being so nice and hostess-like when I had just woken her whole family and it was a school nigh. Ryan had to get up early for work. The whole moment was so ludicrous it struck me as funn

urse I was under mental distress. I wouldn’t normally laugh about such a thing. Really.

“Well, we’ll let you two talk,” Mrs. Ryan said, leading her weary husband up the stairs. “Don’t f

u have school in the morning.”

I watched them go with my face burning hot. When they were gone, I turned to Kyle. His eyes

ncing with amusement. “You almost broke my window,” he said.

“Well, I wanted to get your attention.”

He raised his eyebrows, with a chuckle. “You have it.”

That was my cue to explain. I opened my mouth to do it, but nothing came out. What did I come

? To tell him the girl he was seeing was crazy? The whole thing seemed a little ironic now. “Uh …

have some hot chocolate?”

Kyle laughed. “Sure.”

We went into the kitchen and Kyle made us hot chocolate. Then he sat beside me at the kitchen



asked conversationally, “So what’s up?”

I sighed, not knowing where to start. “I wish you didn’t like Aspen.”

Kyle knocked his head playfully on the table in mock exasperation.

“I know I said that about Misty, but I wouldn’t have if I’d known you were going to date A

tead.”

Kyle looked up at me, using his arm as a pillow. “Now you want me to stop hanging out with Asp

I nodded.

Kyle rubbed his face with his hands. “I don’t think you’re going to like anyone I choose.”

I grinned. “Then let me choose.”

He started drawing on his sketchpad. “Rain, I told you, I’m hard on girls.”

“Well, why did you listen to me about Misty?” I complained irrationally. “I know you think of m

le sister. Guys don’t usually take love advice from their little sister.”

Kyle started on another page. “Yeah, well, I hate to break it to you, but I don’t think of you as a

ter.”

“You don’t?”

He looked up at me and shook his head.

“But you do all that stuff for me.” I tilted my head. “Why do you do all that stuff?”

Still looking at me, he raised his eyebrows, not saying anything.

It made me feel funny. “But … you said the necklace wasn’t a romantic gesture. And you said

s didn’t mean anything.”

Kyle leaned his head back, staring at the ceiling. “Yeah, and you wanted to believe it so badly

d.”

I stared at him in disbelief. “So what are you saying? That you’re in love with me?”

Still staring at the ceiling, he murmured, “Of course I’m in love with you.”



CHAPTER 35

I couldn’t believe it. Kyle just said he loved me. Loved me! I took a nervous sip of my hot choc

ping he didn’t notice my hands were shaking. “You … love me?”

“It really shouldn’t be that big of a shock to you,” Kyle said. “I’ve carried your picture around

for the last nine years. I have it in my pocket now. Do you want to see it?”

I shook my head, feeling confusing, conflicting emotions. I was giddy that he had my picture

cket, but disappointed that that’s why he thought he loved me. Hesitantly, I said, “But that’s not r

ve, Kyle. When you came back, you didn’t even know me.”

“Yeah, that’s what I tried telling myself. Tried. But Rain, I told you, I read your blog while I

ked up—it was my new fix. It made me love you before I even saw you again. And I’ve dream

u forever—since I was a little boy.”

Kyle was silent a moment, just staring into my eyes. He leaned in close. “I think that’s why I’m lyou, Rain—have that link thing. You loved me, and prayed for me, and wished for me. And now

ked to you.” He stared at me wide-eyed. “ Linked .” He sat back. “So, yeah, Rain, I think I know

u’re this sweet girl that wants me to choose the right. And you could take such advantage of me,

because I’d do whatever you want. But all you seem to want is for me to be happy.”

“I do want you to be happy.”

“Yeah.” He shrugged. “But see, you make me happy.”

Hearing him say that sent tingles through my body.

I sat there trying to believe what he was telling me, but there were things about it that I

derstand. Things that didn’t make sense. “Then why doesn’t it seem like you ever want to be a

? Days go by without us talking.”

“I told you, Rain. I’m worried for you being around me—especially because of my feelings for

t distance can’t help that—it doesn’t help.” He closed his eyes a moment. “So, that’s not the

son. The real reason’s easy,” he stared into my eyes, “you have a boyfriend.”



I looked down at my hands. “So … that’s why you never told me the truth? How you really feel?”

“Yeah. Because I know you. If I would have told you how I felt you would have run home and

me back. You would have felt guilty associating with me, being you around me.” He looked int

es. “You would have been careful not to be yourself because you didn’t want me to get the wrong

I stared back down at my hands, knowing everything he was saying was true. We sat there a

ile, silent in our thoughts. Finally Kyle spoke, sounding reflective. “When my parents brought me

m New York, the first thing I saw when we turned onto our street was you sitting in your yard.re sharing an ice-cream cone with Chase. And even though I couldn’t remember you, I knew wh

re. You were the girl from the picture. Only you were with a boy—and just seeing you together fo

ond, it seemed like you loved him.”

Kyle went on, breaking my heart, “So, that day in the mall—when I gave you that Drake Mea

awing—I knew who you were. You were the girl from my picture, and my dreams, but you were in

th another guy.”

I looked up at him, tears running down my cheeks. “Why are you telling me this now?”

Kyle gave a wry smile. “You woke me from a dream of you.”

I sobbed even harder and he put his arms around me. “I love you Rain, but you sure cry a lot.”

I laughed, and Kyle gently stroked my hair.

He murmured in my ear, “So, I took this great risk, telling you all of this. But now what? Ar

ing to avoid me?”

I couldn’t answer him. I had no idea what I was going to do. Instead, I pulled away from him. “Y

one that avoids me. You see me coming in school and you run the other way.”

Kyle shook his head. “You’ve got that wrong.” He sat closer to me, making me look into his ey

n’t avoid you. I’m always overly abundant with happiness to see you. It’s you with Chase—I avoid

d don’t tell me you don’t understand, because tonight you didn’t like being with me and Aspen.”

I groaned. “I knew you were doing that on purpose!”

He gave a little laugh. “I didn’t come in with that intent, but when I saw how disconcerted you

You know, you do that to me a lot. Invite me to come with you and Chase.”

I bit my lip. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know how you felt. I just wanted to be with you—and Chase’s al

th me, so …”

“Yeah.” Kyle started drawing on a new page. “Chase is always with you.”

I swallowed, knowing I should go home. It was late, and if I didn’t go, I might start revealing th

uld regret in the morning. Things that were probably better left unsaid.



And I had the feeling Mrs. Ryan was upstairs itching for me to leave. If I didn’t go soon of my

cord she was probably going to kick me out and she probably wouldn’t be too polite or hostes

out it.

So, I knew I should go.

Only …

There was so much I wanted to know. So much I wanted to understand.

“So, if I hadn’t woke you up tonight—out of your dream, you would have just gone on like you

en? Dating Aspen? You would have never told me how you felt?”

“Maybe.” Kyle shrugged. “I don’t know. I didn’t see the point in telling you. My past is messe

d I don’t go to church or read to the blind. I knew I wasn’t your type.”

I looked at him challengingly. “Why didn’t you try to be my type?”

Kyle sketched my CTR ring. “Would it have done any good?”

“Well, it wouldn’t have done any harm.”

He wet his lips, staring at me a moment. “Okay,” he said, “I’ve been talking with the missionar

ving discussions.”

I widened my eyes. “You what?”

He nodded. “I’m trying to be your type.”



CHAPTER 36

They’re coming! The demons in hooded cloaks. They’re closer than they’ve ever been b

rrying torches in the dark, calling me, screaming my name. “Rain Tolley! Rain Tolley!”

ream it over and over. They’re so close, too close. No! They’ve found me!

“Rain Tolley! Rain Tolley! We found her, Rain Tolley!” Their voices are shrill with victory.

But now Kyle is beside me. He came from nowhere and takes me in his arms, tries to hide me

brace, but the demons, they’ve already found me. They’re gathering all around us. They c

cle, circle, pacing around Kyle and me. They’re so close. Close enough I can feel their fiery b

my back.

They start chanting, “Kill her! Kill her! Kill her!”

They’re chanting it to Kyle!

***

“Thank you for calling Pizza Haven,” I said into the phone, trying to keep the monotone out o

ice. But I was tired. Dead tired. I’d stayed up practically all last night talking with Kyle, finding o

OVED me. And then, of course, after our talk I couldn’t sleep. No way. Kyle LOVED me.

But then, when I finally did fall asleep—right before my alarm went off—I had the scariest dre

whole, entire world. Even thinking about it now, in the bright lights of Pizza Haven gave me g

mps and made me shaky. The demons had gotten closer to me than they ever had before. They c

!

Blah! I spent the whole day trying to forget the dream. But it was hard—impossible, really. And

I stood with the Pizza Haven phone to my ear, I was practically asleep.

Until I heard who was on the line.



“Hello. Rain dear, this is Jennifer Ryan.”

My eyes popped open. “Oh. Hi Mrs. Ryan.”

“Hi,” she said. “There’s no one at my house right now or I’d simply have it delivered, but I’d l

der a pizza. The catch is, I’m not sure what time I’ll be able to pick it up—is that a problem?”

“No, not really,” I said. “But if we make it now, and you don’t come for an hour—it’s not going

t.”

“I know.” She sounded stressed, as though she was having a harried day. “Just go ahead and mak

za now,” she said, “and when I get there, I get there. Cold pizza is better than leftover leftover

st that’s what my family would say.”

About forty minutes later, as I was up to my elbows in two year-old litter—that is a two-year-ol

ered everything he could get his hands on while his family ate—Kyle came sauntering in.

With an armload of garbage, I hurried over to him.

“Hi!” I said, feeling strangely excited and nervous and my heart was doing some sort of weird fl

ng. In other words, I was a spaz. ‘Cause, you know, last night he told me he LOVED me.

Kami hurried to the counter to help Kyle as well. While I was getting his pizza she flirted with

e a … flirter.

“Hi, I’m Kami,” she said. “I’m in your trig class, but I don’t think you’ve ever noticed me bef

ve you?”

“You look familiar,” he said diplomatically, studying her.

“My friends and I throw marshmallows at you during lunch a lot.”

“Yeah, you do.” He seemed to place her face and gave her a puzzled grin. “What's that all about?

“A girl’s got to do something to get a guy’s attention.”

“. . . Yeah.” He smiled. “I guess she does.”

I’d brought the pizza over eons ago, and stood listening to their banter, completely ignored.

Kami tilted her face up at Kyle quizzically, her eyes scheming and gleaming. “Do you h

lfriend?”

Kyle flicked me a look. “We just broke up.”

He said it meaningfully, as though he was letting me know he and Aspen weren’t together any

at he’d dumped yet another girl for me.



Well, that was a huge relief. But …

Witnessing him getting together with Kami was making me sort of nauseous. Nothing against K

e was a way better choice than Misty and Aspen (by leaps and bounds). But she wasn’t … Nine.

Or near Nine’s caliber. Or Kyle’s.

“You seem to know what you’re doing in trig, “ Kami said to Kyle. “I’m lost in that class. Do

nk you could help me with it? Like tonight? After work?”

“Uh …” Kyle looked over at me questioningly, as though asking my permission, or if I’d mind.

What could I say? “No, don’t help my friend that’s been giving me rides to and from work,

vering my shifts in hours of need?” No, I couldn’t say that.

Not right in front of her anyway.

I shrugged, like— Go ahead. What do I care?

And so he did what I’d been inwardly begging him not to do. He said, “Sure.”

Ugh. The pain!

They started making their plans and seeming quite pleased with them. Inside I was dying.

I had to do something. Stop them. In desperation, I blurted out, “I need help with trig, too!”

Both Kyle and Kami gazed up at me with surprise.

Flustered, I went on, “I, uh, have a huge test tomorrow.”

Kyle looked at me funny—like, doesn’t your boyfriend help you with trig? But he didn’t as

estion aloud, thank goodness. Instead he said, “Okay. Come over and I’ll help you too.”

“Okay,” I said meekly, ignoring the annoyed look Kami shot me.

I have to admit, though, I did feel sort of guilty. Really, I had no right to come between Kami mak

ve connection. Normally, I wouldn’t. Normally I’d be happy for her. But this was my Kyle. He ndance. Nurturing. Nine.

On the way home, Kami seemed annoyed that I was coming to Kyle’s as well. But she didn’t

ht out and say anything. So I said, “Boy, what a relief that Kyle’s going to help us with our trig, h

though I didn’t have a clue that I was coming between her big hookin’-up-with-Kyle plans.

“Yeah, that’s great ,” Kami said through gritted teeth. Then she added, “But I have things to do be

over to his house. I won’t be able to give you a ride.”

She seemed to be hoping that would prevent me from making it to his house. I sat back, not tellin



le lives right down the street from me.

***

I called Nine as soon as I rushed in the door. I told her about Kami trying work up something smo

th Kyle. And me nosing my way in. “But she’s a fast worker!” I said anxiously. “We have to act you need to come with me to Kyle’s tonight. He can help you with your trig too.”

“Well, there’s two problems with that,” Nine said. “First of all, I’m not in trig, and second o

le’s not interested in me. At all. The boy can’t even remember my name.”

Nine went on destroying my plans. “There’s even a third of all: I have to study Spanish—a clas

ually in.”

I sighed. Why was she being so difficult? “You won’t just come for a little while? Please? For m

The thing about Nine is—she grows on people. But how could she possibly grow on Kyle if h

ver around her?

Nine groaned. “Rain! I really do have to study. And me coming—it’s pointless. I’m telling yo

y’s not interested in me. At all. End of story. Actually, I doubt he’s even interested in Kami.

erested in you, Rain. That’s it.”

I bit my lip, not exactly able to argue against that. Not anymore.

Still, I would have tried harder to get Nine to come. Made her start growing on Kyle—

mediately. Only suddenly I remembered what Kyle had said—he was hard on girls. I didn’t wan

st friend to get her heart broken. Only, deep down, I knew if Kyle met the right girl, gave her a ch

would be the best thing any girl could ask for. I knew that.

Okay, I’ll just talk Nine up tonight , I decided.

In record speed, I changed out of my frilly Pizza Haven uniform and into a pair of jeans. Then I

mb through my hair, grabbed my books, and dashed off to Kyle’s.

I was afraid Kami might have lied about the errands she had to run and had trotted over to Kyle

nute she dropped me off. I was afraid she was at his house right this minute—seducing him. The th

de me run. And frantically pound on his front door as soon as I got to his house.

I was still wheezing and out of breath from running when Kyle answered the door. He studie

izzically, looking half-concerned, half-amused. “Was someone chasing you?” he asked.

“Uh … a dog,” I panted.



That was the truth. Sort of. It wasn’t a lie, exactly. There had been a dog that had run along afte

, he was my neighbor’s dog and super friendly. Still, he’d chased me … sort of.

I looked around the room. “Is Kami here yet?”

“No.” Kyle led me into the kitchen. “She’s not coming.”

Relief!

I plopped in the chair next to his. “She’s not coming—at all?”

He shook his head. “Not tonight. She called. Something came up.”

“Hmm.” I paged through my trig book, feeling quite satisfied with myself, thinking I’d interv

en it hit me. “Is she coming a different night?”

“Yeah. Probably.” He glanced up at me wryly. “Unless you don’t want her to.”

“I don’t!” I exclaimed. “The key is nice Kyle. Not that Kami isn’t nice. She is. But she’s … she’… Look you should date someone like Nine … or Lauren. Someone from youth group.”

He bit his lip. “You needed help with trig, right?”

Yeah, I needed help. I had a huge test tomorrow—that was more than a desperate ploy to

ween him and Scami Kami. It was a fact.

I found where I was in my trig book, and Kyle leaned over, helping me figure out problem

oblem. He was so incredibly patient. Like an angel.

He’s so nice , I thought, staring at him admiringly as he tried to figure out where I’d made an er

e of my theorems. I really need to get him together with Nine.

I scooted closer to him. “How do you feel about Nine?” I asked conversationally.

“What?” He was still trying to find my error.

“How do you feel about Nine? Do you like her?”

“Nine?” He ran his hands through his hair, still focusing on my math.

“Yeah, Nine. I’m not talking about getting together together. Not all boyfriend-girlfriend. But to

t with—and take to dances.”

Kyle gazed at my work, then up at me. “Huh? Look, I can’t talk and help you with this at the

me.”

“Then quit helping me for a minute,” I said, getting into a more comfortable position.



Kyle put down his pencil, looking amused to see me gazing up at him expectantly. “I thought you

t tomorrow. You’d rather talk about Nine and me than pass the test?”

“Of course.”

Kyle grinned and sat back, resigned to his fate. “Okay—what was your question? No. Forget i

d, seeming to remember. “I don’t want to talk about that.”

Geesh! “Kyle, Nine’s a lot of fun. I know you’d really, really like her if you’d just give her a chan

Kyle stared at me a moment, then picked up his pencil. “Let’s just work on your math, alright?”

Geesh! “Why won’t you give her a chance?”

He looked up from my work to stare into my eyes. “I can’t give her a chance, Rain. She’s you

end, and I’m in love with you.”

Hearing him say that gave my heart an unexpected jump. True, he’d said it last night, too. But

sn’t used to it. It just wouldn’t sink in, couldn’t sink in.

“Kyle, I have a boyfriend.”

“Yeah. No kidding. Look, Rain, I don’t want to talk about this anymore. Do you want help with

th or not?”

I have to admit, I was flattered at the thought of Kyle pining for me, super flattered. After all,

d that huge, stupid crush on him. And hearing how he felt about me sure didn’t help me ditch it.

dn’t want Kyle lonely and miserable. I wanted him happy. Besides, I figured I could get over himsier if he had a girlfriend—especially if his girlfriend was Nine. Then I wouldn’t have to worry

m so much—or think about him all the time. I could go back to thinking about Chase—go back to b

od girlfriend.

“Kyle, you don’t know Nine very well,” I said. “We’re a lot alike.”

“Look, Rain, you really need to stop, okay? Or I’m going to start saying stuff you don’t want to

cause to me, there is no other girl like you. I love you Rain.”

I looked down at my hands, not knowing what to say.

Kyle was silent for a moment, too. But then he went on, trying to make me understand. “Look, it

rd for me, okay? It kills me to know you want me to be with one of your friends when all I want to

with you.”

What was I supposed to say to that? I wasn’t made of stone. And any walls I’d tried to build

umbling. I wanted to reach out to him, tell him I wanted to be with him too. But I couldn’t do th

uld I?



I was so confused. He had to be confused too.

“Kyle,” I took his hand, “you’re an amazing guy. I’m flattered by your feelings. I really a

ttered, but—”

He pulled his hand away. “Yeah. That’s what this is about—I wanted to flatter you. Look, don

s, okay? You have a boyfriend, I need to date one of your friends. I get it.”

Did he get it? Did I get it? I swallowed, trying to ignore my heart. (It was totally unreliable.) Inst

ed to be sensible.

“Kyle, I think you’re confused. You had my picture all of this time, through all of your torment. I

onfused you. I mean, you draw me as an angel .”

He set his jaw. “I dream of you as an angel.” He said it, like What’s your point?

“It confused your feelings about me.”

Kyle shook his head. “You may want to believe that. But I’m not confused. I love you. I thinkways loved you, even when I was a little boy.”

His words touched me, made me want to cry, and I probably would have started bawling, only a

oment I saw what he was drawing—the demonic cloaked people from my nightmares last night. S

drawing made my blood run cold.

“What? What is it?” Kyle asked, glancing up, sensing my terror.

“That picture,” I gasped. “Why are you always drawing pictures like that?”

Kyle turned away. “I told you, I dream about them.”

Me too! I wanted to tell him, but I didn’t get the chance because Kyle’s next words, sent chills th

. “I dream about you, my dad, and demons—that’s it. And my dad’s basically a demon, so …”

I could cry. I bit my lip, not knowing what to say. I’m sure his dad was like a demon to him. H

d killed his mother.

“I dream about them too,” I whispered at last, letting Kyle know he wasn’t alone. “I dream aboutmons.”

Kyle blanched, looking horrified. He squinted his eyes. “You dream of demons?”

I nodded and he looked as though he was going to be sick. “Tell me everything about your nightm

in.” He rubbed his forehead with the heels of his hands. “Every detail.”

Reluctantly, I recounted all the terrifying dreams I’d been having since the night Kyle saved the

out the demons, and the car crash, everything.



“Those are my dreams,” Kyle said. “You’re having my nightmares.”



CHAPTER 37

All during first period I scrawled in my notebook, pouring out my heart—all the concern

nfusion I was going through. What was up with Kyle? Why did he seem to have special powers?

d it mean that I was having his dreams?

Why does he dream demons want him to kill me?

I scribbled question after question, but had no answers. Finally, I started writing about things i

art that were less bizarre, but still baffling—to me. Like Kyle had said he wanted to be my typ

d that. But he never came to church, or to youth group activities.

Of course, I learned that had a lot to do with Chase and me being a couple. “I can’t take being a

two of you together,” Kyle had said.

But learning Kyle’s true feelings for me left me in a cloud of confusion. Lately, I scribbled

otional essays in my journal continually. Time and time again, I came to the same devasnclusion: I should break up with Chase. But knowing you should do something, and actually doing

o different things. I had been with Chase a long time. We were good together. And I didn’t want to

m. I just couldn’t do it.

Those were my thoughts as I went to my locker at break— I can’t break-up with Chase. I just

it. But then I shut my locker and there was Kyle standing only a few feet away, watching me.

Last night Kyle asked me if learning of his true feelings disturbed me. I had answered him no

ing him now, I realized I wasn’t only not disturbed by them, I was down right pleased.

This isn’t good , I told myself. But I couldn’t help smiling as Kyle sauntered over to me.

“Do you mind if I just hang out with you for a while?” he asked, leaning against the locker n

ne.

“No, of course I don’t mind,” I said. “But you never have before.”

“No. I haven’t. I’d like to. But—you have a boyfriend.”

I gazed down at my shoes. “So what’s different about today?”



“I just feel really close to you right now,” he said. “I want to be close to you.”

I looked up at him with a smile. “What’s brought this on?”

He wet his lips. “We watched this film in first period. It was kind of dumb, but it had this gir

t was a ballerina. She made me think of you. I’ve been thinking about being with you since

riod.”

“Being with me and doing what?”

He shrugged. “This … I guess. I just wanted to be near you.”

I leaned against my locker, smiling. It was nice to hear he’d been thinking about me, wanting

ar me. I wanted to be near him too. Something was changing inside me, and I couldn’t help it.

s. As I stood beside him, filled with happiness just because we were together, I realized: I don

ve a crush on Kyle—I love him.

But that was sort of sad. And not good. … Was it? No, of course it wasn’t. I had a boyfriend andd demons.

I changed the subject in my brain and aloud, not wanting to think about it. Instead I said, “The Su

hool is putting on a program this Sunday in Sacrament meeting.”

Kyle nodded slightly. “I know. Cherri has a part in it.” He grinned. “She’s been hoggin

hroom, practicing in front of the mirror.”

“So,” I hesitated, “are you going to come?”

“I don’t know.… I don’t think I can.”

This was something I had wanted to talk to him about forever. “Why?”

Kyle stared at the wall of lockers across the corridor. I doubted he really saw them, though

med to be looking past them—on to something I couldn’t see.

“It’s more than just the dark spirit thing—my nightmares.” He leaned his head against the l

hind him. “The people from church—they come by a lot—just to welcome me back—and theylly nice. But I can tell by the way they look at me they’re disappointed in me—in the way I turned

I couldn’t believe he was saying that. “Kyle, no one’s disappointed in you. No one could possib

appointed in you. You’re a good person.”

Kyle shook his head. “You don’t know. I’ve done a lot of things wrong.”

“Kyle,” I took his hand, “it doesn’t matter what you did in the past. It matters what you do now.”

He took a deep breath. “You really believe that?—really?”



I nodded.

He looked into my eyes seeming anxious to ask me something, but hesitant as well. “Rain, why di

it writing your blog?—I mean, it helped people. Not just me. People in the detention center with

y were reading it. We were all reading it.”

I sighed, feeling tingles again. I felt them every time he talked about my blog. “Yeah, I guess a

ople were. But that’s the thing, some of them were wack-o’s. This one guy, Stan, kept threatening m

“Stan?” Kyle blanched, looking sick.

“Yeah, Stan.” I stared at Kyle, my stomach knotting. “Kyle, what is it? You’re scaring me. What’

tter?”

He shook his head, stepping back, taking ragged breaths. “I knew I was bad for you. I knew it

unded his fist into the nearest locker.

“Kyle!” I reached for him, trying to calm him down. “Kyle—”

He growled, pulling away from me. He slammed his fist into the locker again.

My pulse and heart raced. I’d never seen Kyle upset before, ever. Nothing upset him, nothing,

er. I knew whatever this was—it was horrible. I sank back against my locker, frightened

mediately Kyle took a deep breath, turning back to me. “I’m sorry.”

He reached for me, but then grimaced and pulled back his hands, stepping away. Silently, he wa

aggle of girls pass by chirping about their dance practice. One called his name with a bright smi

nodded saying nothing, not really seeing her it seemed, his eyes were troubled and focused oce the girls turned the corner, Kyle still kept his distance, though he seemed to want to be nea

ned toward me, then away, wetting his lips.

“Okay, Rain, know this, okay?” He ran his hands through his hair. “Whatever happens to me, it d

tter. I came back for you.”

I stared at him, having no idea what he was talking about.

“That stuff you wrote about me, on your blog—those things you wrote. They changed me.

mbling around—messing up, destroying everything—having no clue why I was here, why I had

ough all this. But then I realized, it was for you. I’m here for you.”

“Kyle,” I was shaking. “I don’t understand.”

“I know. And I hope you never will,” he said, taking another step back. “But just know this, okay

re for you. I came back for you. So, whatever happens to me—it’s okay. It doesn’t matter. I cam

u.”

What was he talking about? He was scaring me. My heart was pounding in my ears. I couldn’



d Kyle started to walk away, like that was it, like we were done talking. But no way were we done

ren’t even close to done. I chased after him and grabbed his arm. I tried pushing him against a loc

ke him stay and talk. But Kyle is a big guy. He didn’t budge. He just looked at me with weary ey

n’t let anything happen to you Rain.”

“Kyle, I know that,” I said, tears welling in my eyes. “I know that. You’ve saved me so many tim

many times! It was your necklace that saved me in my car accident. If I hadn’t been leaning over t

up, I would have been toast.”

Kyle looked away, like he knew that. Like he knew! Geesh! There was so much about him that I

derstand.

“Kyle, you know Stan?” My voice was shrill. “Who’s Stan?”

Kyle narrowed his lips into a thin, grim line. He sank back against the locker I had tried backin

o a moment ago, covering his eyes with the crook of his arm as though he had a massive head

What all has Stan done to you?”

“I don’t know—I really don’t. Maybe just wrote me emails,” I said. “But it seems like he also—only maybe not. I don’t know how he would have my address or know who I am.”

“He knows me,” Kyle said. “He’s my dad.”



CHAPTER 38

I sunk to the ground against the locker behind me, no longer able to stand. My heart was poundi

rd against my chest it hurt. “Your—your dad is Stan?”

Kyle sat down beside me. “My dad is Stan.”

I swallowed, hiding my hands under my legs because they were shaking like a rattle. I didn’tle to see.

My voice hitched. “Where is he?”

We never talked about his dad before, ever. It seemed it hurt too much for him to talk about. No

eeks were flushed and his eyes were red.

I whispered, “I thought he was in prison.”

Kyle shook his head. “He’s back in the mental hospital in Riverside. It’s only about fifteen mi

ay.”

My heart slammed against my chest. “And he knows me? He knows who I am?”

Kyle took a deep breath, looking away. “I’m afraid to tell you this. I don’t want to tell you this

t his head on his knees. They were drawn up to his chest. I could see him breathing hard, se

uggling.

Finally, in what seemed like resignation, Kyle raised his head and turned back to me. “Rain.” Hey hand, holding it tight, as though trying to comfort me for what he was about to say. “You know

u’re having my dreams—about the demons?”

I nodded.

Kyle ran his hands through his hair. “And you know it’s because I’m linked to you, right?”

He waited for me to nod, as though he wanted to make sure I understood before he went on. W

ally nodded, he tightened his hold on my hand, apparently to give me more support for whaming next. “Okay, but see—for some reason—I’m linked to my dad too. I don’t know why, but I



was silent a long time, staring at our entwined hands. “Do you get that Rain? I’m linked to him.”

I bit my lip, feeling sick, but I got it. I nodded.

Kyle leaned his head back against the locker behind him. He stared up at the ceiling, and ex

wly. “That’s how he knows you. He sees my dreams, too.”

Kyle wet his lips, then flicked a look at me. “Not all my dreams are bad, Rain—I told you that, ri

am of angels. I dream of you.”

I swallowed, suddenly gasping. I couldn’t breathe, because I got it. Now I understood that evil,

ssage I got the other night.

I broke out in a sweat, the haunting words screaming through my brain. “I see you dance

ghtmares—he sees you too.”

It was his dad. He saw me dancing in his dreams, because he was having Kyle’s dreams.

amed of me dancing … and Stan saw it.

I curled my knees up to my chest, my breath coming out in short, ragged puffs, like a whi

membering the phone call that came after. I clutched my stomach, doubling over in pain.

Kyle tenderly took me into his arms, stroking my hair. His breathing was as fast as the pounding

art. “I’m so sorry, Rain.”

He whispered in my ear soothingly, like a promise, “You’re going to be okay, though. I swear,

u’re going to be okay.”

But I knew I wasn’t, because of the words of the phone call.

“In our dreams we see you dance in a cemetery—but soon we’ll dance on your grave!”



CHAPTER 39

Kyle held me a long time, even after the bell rang and student traffic started filling the locker

nally, he wiped away my tears with the sleeve of his shirt.

“Let’s get a drink,” he said gently, then tenderly helped me to my feet.

He walked me to the water fountain, though he practically had to carry me. My legs were as w

rubber. I was shaking so bad Kyle wordlessly gave me his outer shirt, wrapping it around me

ided me through the crowded halls like a shield.

At the water fountain, Kyle held the handle for me, so I could get a drink and splash my face. H

ng so kind and comforting—it had me ready to bawl again. Trembling, I took a deep breath, try

ld back a new flood of tears.

I was weak and scared and overly emotional. It didn’t help my resolve not to cry that as I drank

derly held my hair back away from my face so it didn’t get in the water’s path. His eyes

gilantly on me, watching my every move, silently accommodating my needs before I realized I eve

m.

As he walked me to class, Kyle held my hand tight, still protectively shielding me from the st

ffic. Only now I was conscious enough of my surroundings to realize everyone’s eyes were on us

de our way through the crowded halls. I knew their gazing was just as much because Kyle was ho

y hand as because my nose and eyes were red from crying. I couldn’t build up enough energy to

ugh. I was shaking and scared. No matter how hard I tried, my thoughts wouldn’t stray from S

eats and the terrifying fact he could see me.

He sees me dance in his dreams.



It was like a broken record running through my head. The question was why? Why could Sta

le’s dreams? Why was Kyle linked to him? Or linked to me for that matter? Why? It didn’t make

ealized Kyle had said he had no idea why he was linked to us, but suddenly I wondered if ther

meone who might know … someone with that kind of ability.



I swallowed, trying to gulp down the lump in my throat. I hadn’t uttered a word since learning

s linked to Kyle. I’d felt like I’d never speak again, but now I needed words.

“We need to talk to Hanna,” I choked out.

Kyle nodded, tightening his hold on my shaking hand. “She won’t talk to me though. She

enever I go near her.”

I bit my lip. “Me too.”

I’d been trying to talk to her all week. Yesterday, I’d seen her in the school library. As soon a

w me coming toward her, she dropped her book—literally dropped it—and ran for the exit.

“She might talk to Chase,” I finally said, figuring it was worth a try. I gave a heavy sigh. “W

bush her at lunch.”

Kyle nodded grimly, like the plan was set. “Before we talk to Hanna, though—right now—lets h

nversation, okay? A good one that can make you happy, because I can’t take this.” Kyle ran his

ough his hair. “And because whatever Hanna says—Rain, it’s going to scare you.”

My eyes welled with tears just hearing him say that.

“Come on.”

Kyle explained to my teacher I was sick and then gently led me away from class to the stairs

wn to an empty art room, flipping on the light. He had me sit in front of a pottery wheel. A po

eel!

I shook my head. “I have no idea how to do this.”

He sat across from me and guided my hands on a slab of wet clay. For a long time we work

rapeutic silence, saying nothing, simply spinning a beautiful pot out of clay.

“… I have something tell you,” Kyle said, still guiding my hands. “I guess you’ll like it. It’s wha

nt, I guess.”

I gazed at him curiously. Finally, he went on. “I’m taking Lauren to the dance at your church

turday.”

I stared at him, pulling my hands away. “You’re what?”

Kyle got up, assuming we were done with the pot. He walked with me over to the sink, latherin

nds with soap. “That’s what you wanted, right?—me to date one of your friends? Only, it’s not re

e. When she called and asked me, she said that you just go and dance with a bunch of different pe

explained it as though I’d never been to a church dance. “Apparently, there’s a lot of cookies.”

“That’s so … terrific,” I said with a frozen smile.



A couple of days ago I would have been ecstatic to hear that he was taking my advice and goin

th one of my friends. But a couple of days ago I hadn’t realized I might actually be in love with him

Still, I tried to smile, tried to seem pleased. And I was. Don’t get me wrong. I was thrilled th

s going to a church activity. And, really, I was glad he was going with Lauren. That was so much

n seeing him with Aspen.

It’s a good thing , I kept telling myself. But it didn’t matter if it was a good thing or not. It hurt.

“That’s great,” I said again, scrubbing at my hands.

“Yeah.” He watched me, looking confused. “I thought you’d be glad.”

As we scrubbed, Kyle changed the subject again, though I could tell he was hesitant. He kept c

d uncurling his fists. Finally, he just blurted it out. “So, my dad—he’s just been threatening you

n call the hospital. They told me to call when he got his privileges back. They said if he harassed m

ntacted me in any way, I should call.”

I took a deep breath, the knot in my stomach twisting. “Privileges back?”

“Yeah. For a long time—years—he wasn’t allowed to use the phone or internet, but he got

vileges back last year. But now—maybe, a week ago—he started in this program where he can

pervised outings.”

I crumbled into the nearest chair, doubling over. It was Stan in the car! It was him! He hadn’t

eaming about the weather; he had been screaming my name. He tried to kill me! He wanted to dan

y grave!

Kyle came and sat beside me, gently brushing my hair back as I slumped over, ready to puke. “

nce on your grave! We’ll dance on your grave! We’ll dance on your grave!” Stan’s words sw

und in my head, making me whimper.

“What’s he done?” Kyle asked.

On our way to my next class, I told Kyle about my car accident—the whole thing, not leaving any

t—every word the driver had said about the passenger—him going crazy and screaming abo

ather, stomping on the accelerator, having to be sedated.

Kyle listened, going paler and paler. But all he said was, “It will be okay, Rain.” He squeeze

nd. “We’ll tell the police and they’ll lock him up. He won’t be able to bother you again.”

Blinking back tears, I asked to borrow his phone. There was no use getting all worked up if it w

en Stan that day. Maybe it wasn’t Stan. Maybe. I called the van company back.

Swallowing, I asked nervously, “Can you just tell me if you rent your van to the Riverside m

spital?”



When I was told, yes, that they did, on Saturdays, my stomach dropped. So did my heart. T

rted beating spastic.

“Thank you,” I said in complete monotone, handing Kyle back his phone. “It was him,” I whispe

Kyle nodded, “I know.”

We stood silent for a long while, both of us lost in our own thoughts. When Kyle spoke again, he

lective, changing the subject to something warm and nice, like a hug wrapping around me, g

mfort when I was positive comfort couldn’t be found.

“I can kind of remember us playing in some fields,” he said. “I don’t really remember that much

I can picture this green field with some hills, and the sun shining on us, and we’re running ar

ghing. There’s a black dog chasing us.”

“Mugs,” I said softly with tears forming in my eyes. “His name was Mugs. He was your dog. We

take him to the fields behind our neighborhood everyday after school.”

“Mugs,” Kyle said thoughtfully.

The bell rang and suddenly doors were swung open and students swarmed the halls.

“Well, see you at lunch, Rain,” Kyle said.

There was an aching in my heart as I watched him walk away.

***

When the bell rang for lunch, both Kyle and Chase were waiting for me at my locker. Seeing

ether knotted my already upset and twisted stomach. At first, I thought Chase was mad, blazin

e was all red and blotchy, but then, he started toward me and I saw the look in his eyes wasn’t a

t concern.

He wrapped his arms around me tight, forcing comfort on me, and I took it gratefully, sunk into it.

“Rain, babe, Kyle told me about his dad sending you those messages and smashing into your car

d me tighter, rubbing my shoulders. “Don’t worry his dad won’t bother you anymore.”

Apparently, last period, Kyle didn’t go to class. Instead, he spent the hour reporting Stan to the p

d then the hospital, disclosing about Stan’s emails and phone calls, and then, the van incident

spital said they would put Stan under the highest form of security—no more computer or p

vileges for Stan. No more outings either. He had lost those privileges with the last trip—when he

zy. The hospital assured Kyle that Stan wouldn’t be bothering anyone again.



Chase seemed to think that was the end of it, the matter was closed. He was all apologies, th

ying he was sorry he didn’t take the threats more seriously.

“I just thought the guy was a random loony,” Chase explained for the hundredth time. “I’m sorr

d to go through all of that, Rain.”

I bit my lip, not knowing how I felt about his apology. He had made me feel like a lunatic for th

w months because I was concerned for my welfare. That was hard to forgive. But right now,

mething else pressing on my mind, something that it seemed only Chase could help me with.

So, when Chase pulled away from me to look into my eyes, and asked sorrowfully, “You forgive

ht?”

I was honest. “I don’t know Chase. I can’t think about that right now. I need you to do me a favor

He tilted his head, questioningly, his cheeks flushed bright red. “Name it.”

“I need you to talk to Hanna.”

Chase stiffened. “Hanna? What does she have to do with this?”

I clinched my jaw, knowing he wouldn’t listen. And no way could he understand. “Will you just

ease Chase? Make her talk to us?”

Chase eyed Kyle, then me. He took a deep breath. “Sure.”

Kyle knew right where Hanna spent lunch period—in the library.

When we got there, there she was, sitting at a table, doing math.

“She won’t talk to me,” I whispered to Chase at the door. “Whenever she sees me, she runs.”

He smiled, opening the door for me. “Well, she doesn’t run when she sees me. She’ll talk to us.”

He was awfully confident about it, cocky. Still of course, I hoped he was right. It was unse

ough, desperately wanting a girl to have such strong feelings for my boyfriend that she would be w

talk with Kyle and me—zombies, as far as she was concerned.

But did Hanna have that strong of a “thing” for Chase? I was kind of getting the feeling she did…

en I saw her look up at us, I knew she did. Her eyes lit up when she saw Chase, and she didn’t eve

ay when she saw Kyle and me—though she looked like she really, really wanted to. Only, we ki

d her cornered at the table.

“Okay, here’s the deal,” Chase said, bypassing chitchat. “You freaked out my girlfriend the other

d we need you to explain what you think you know.”

Hanna looked from Chase to me, then back to Chase. “I can’t,” she said. “I wish I could. But—”



“Hanna,” he said coaxingly. “We really need your help.”

She bit her lip, looking scared. Finally she said, “Just one question, and then you have to leav

ne.” She looked at Kyle and me. “You promise, you’ll leave me alone?”

Both Kyle and I nodded.

She took a deep breath. “What’s the question?”

Kyle looked to me and I widened my eyes. I had so many, it wasn’t fair; I couldn’t choose. Fina

urted out, “Why is Kyle’s father linked to him?”

Hanna swallowed, then tentatively touched the palm of Kyle’s hand. She whimpered the momen

uched it, jumping away as though she’d been burned.

Hanna gazed at me—purposely not at Kyle. She took a step back, ready to run.

“His dad’s linked to him because his dad murdered him…. And you’re linked to him, Rain. Be

u brought him back.”



CHAPTER 40

Hanna scrambled out of the library before she even had the horrifying words completely out o

outh. She said them as she ran away.

Chase chuckled, staring after her. “Well, that was interesting.”

Kyle didn’t say anything. His face was ashen. His eyes briefly met mine, then he looked away.

No one had a chance to speak before the librarian marched over to us, telling us we needed to

le and be quiet. Kyle seemed glad for her distraction. His eyes watched me as Mrs. Dubsky lectu

proper library behavior.

“I need to go,” Kyle said to Chase as soon as Mrs. Dubsky left. His eyes cut to me, then ba

ase. “Watch over her.”

Then he hurried out of the library and Chase watched him go with a smirk and furrowed ou’ve really started to hang out with some weird people.”

He noticed me clutching my stomach and his voice went gentle. “Rain, I know he’s been through

I know that. But you can’t save him. Look what’s happening. He’s bringing you down—getting y

nger. And Hanna’s freaking you out—she’s a freak, Rain. You need to drop these people before

k with them.”

He took my hand. “You’re shaking. Rain, seriously—you need to stop hanging out with them.”

The ironic thing was—that was what I was always saying to Kyle about the people he choociate with…. But those people didn’t rant about bringing people back from the dead.

***

“Why don’t we go to the basketball game instead?” I said Saturday afternoon when Chase cal what time I wanted him to pick me up for the dance.



Chase sounded surprised. “But you love church dances.”

I sighed. “I know, usually. But I don’t feel like dancing tonight.”

I really didn’t. At all. The week had been brimming with stress from the beginning to the end

rning Stan was Kyle’s father and that he was the person that hit my car, then having to deal wit

lice. They had me fill out unending reports about the accident and Stan’s threats, making me reliv

l the same information over and over and over.

It had all been exhausting. Yet that wasn’t my only reason for wanting to skip the dance. There

o the fact that if I went, Kyle would be there with Lauren and I would be there with Chase. The th

having to endure a whole night of confused, jumbled feelings made me sort of sick. I didn’t w

ve to deal with secret emotions—love or jealousy or anything like that. It would be torture. And w

d I wasn’t up for it—even if my week had been cake.

Chase, of course, was happy to go to the game. We sat with his friends from the football team

eered our school on. The game was close and exciting and almost kept my mind off thoughts of

most.

But I spent most of the night hoping Kyle was having fun. In a way I wished I was at the da

king sure he felt included and was having a good time. But in another, I was glad I wasn’t ther

s in Lauren’s capable hands. That was reassuring, but not exactly something I wanted to see.

As for Chase and me, he held my hand and acted like everything was fine between us. But it w

ings weren’t the same—not for me anyway. In my heart, I knew I needed to break up with him. B

d been my boyfriend a long, long time and he was a good guy—a wonderful guy … just not the righ

me, not anymore. But his birthday was only two weeks away. I felt I should wait until after that

m anything that would hurt him. I felt I owed him that—a happy birthday.

So, I let him hold my hand and I smiled woodenly at his compliments and I knew I would miss

very first boyfriend.

***

“My parents aren’t home,” I told Chase at the door after the game. It wasn’t a hard-set rule th

uldn’t come in when they weren’t home. What was a rule was he couldn’t go upstairs when

ren’t home. But Chase never felt comfortable about coming in when my parents weren’t around. I

was a rule his parents had.

“Do you want to sit out on the porch a while?” he suggested.

“Okay,” I said, though it was cold and I needed hot chocolate—fast.



I flipped on the porch light. That’s when I saw the box. It was off to the side of the doorway, hid

shadows. Seeing it sent a chill through me, though I wasn’t sure why.

Chase saw me staring at it, saw me breathing uneasily. He tilted his head.

“What is it?” he asked, picking up the box since I didn’t.

He studied the unmarked outer covering, then looked at me questioningly. I bit my lip, shakin

ad. I had no idea what it was, but since Stan crept into my life, unexpected gifts knotted my sto

ough I guess they shouldn’t have. Stan was locked away. He couldn’t bother me anymore—suppos

“Do you want me to open it?” Chase asked, though he was already doing it.

I leaned from one foot to the other, watching him open the box, then clutched my stomach wh

oked bewildered, pulling out the picture Hanna had bought from Kyle’s exhibit.

Chase handed me the painting, muttering, “Hanna is really weird.”

I stared at the painting, tilting my head in confusion. Hanna had taped numbers to various parts ture. It was curious. And disturbing. Some of the numbers depicted elements I hadn’t even no

fore, like #3 was a tiny little man hiding behind a rock. He was dark and drawn in the shadows,

nd of blended in. I didn’t even see him before, but seeing him now made me completely sick. H

tching the angel with bug-eyes and his head tilted slightly as though he was hearing something

at turned my blood cold was, he was wielding a knife.

My stomach twisted. Why did Hanna give this to me? What was it supposed to mean? I studie

ms that corresponded to the numbers, trying to piece together what Hanna was trying to say.

#1 Was the angel.

#2 Was a star.

#3 Was the little man hiding behind the rock.

#4 Was the demons.

That was it. What did it mean?

Chase broke my confused trance. “Oh! Rain, Hanna wrote you a note.” He slid it out of the bo

nded it to me

I read Hanna’s words, then squeezed my eyes shut, studying them more carefully.

This is what the picture means:

1) That’s You—angel

2) That’s Kyle—star



3) That’s Kyle’s dad

4) That’s demons

Understand? Kyle is your wish, your prayers. You brought him back. (Picture of star.)

ere’s his Dad in the shadows. He’s in the dark, linked to Kyle, and he’s hearing voices—dem

ices. Kyle’s linked to you both—you *and* his dad—good and evil tugging at him on earth.

But the demons are watching you , Rain. Because you’re linked to Kyle. And you’re in their

ose demons (or dark spirits or whatever you choose to call them) they want Kyle. Becau

longs to them … almost. Watch out!!!! They can get inside him Rain, mess around with his

ntrol him, because—GET THIS, Rain—he’s dead!!!



CHAPTER 41

Hanna’s note drifted to the ground as I stared at the painting more closely. Chase picked the no

d read it. He narrowed his eyes, staring at me pale and shaking.

“You’re not taking Hanna seriously, are you?” He scoffed impatiently, crumbling up the note. “

t chick is nuts. Why do you let her get to you? Why do you even associate with her?”

I bit my lip. I didn’t know what to believe. But what Hanna said, it was what Kyle said too: I br

m back—home. Away from New York and the tragedies of his past.

Of course, I didn’t believe everything Hanna said, of course. A lot of it, I assumed, was metaph

d not meant to be taken literally. Like maybe she meant Kyle was dead inside, like broken and

lled by two forces—his life now, and the (metaphoric) demons of his past. That’s what it seeme

e was saying.

Still, it didn’t stop my shivering. And it made Chase roll his eyes. “Rain, stay away from Ha

an it. She freaks you out. It’s weird.”

***

Sunday morning at church, I pulled Lauren aside as soon as she came into the building. I want

l her last night, but I resisted. It was late, and it would have seemed extreme. But I wanted to hea

r night with Kyle had gone. Did he have a good time? Did they go to McDonald’s afterwards? Wa

od dancer?

But as soon as I started to bombard Lauren with my questions, she raised her hand, stopping me

dn’t come,” she said flatly. “He called me yesterday afternoon and said he wasn’t ready. Whateve

ans.”

“… Oh.”

“Anyway, he made me a deal. He’s going to come to our activity on Thursday instead. You k

at it is, though? We’re pulling weeds for Sister Marshall.” Lauren scowled with a sigh. “Kyle w



her pull weeds than go to a dance with me.”

I’m sure she was baffled by that. Lauren was used to having guys fall at her feet. Still, she didn’t

o upset as she hurried to sit with her family.

I lingered in the foyer—just in case. But when the Ryans came into the building, there was no

th them.

What was up with him? He didn’t go to the dance with Lauren as he’d said he would, and he

me to church. Were these things really that hard for him?

I sat with my parents feeling sad. After the sacrament, Chase came and sat beside me as a

ldren from Sunday School congregated on the stand for their program. When they stood singing “

e To Walk In the Light,” I almost started bawling. Church songs always get to me, especially the Su

hool ones. And I was thinking about Kyle and how he was taken away so young.

It wasn’t fair. As a child he was being taught to walk in the light. But circumstances beyon

ntrol left him stumbling in the dark. Could he find his way back? Was it possible?

I was ready to cry, afraid that it wasn’t, but then … I looked up, and there was Kyle! He was dr

a suit, and it seemed as though there was a glow shining from him. I stared at him in wonder.

Chase noticed my transfixed gaze and glanced over to see what I was staring at. When he saw

s Kyle, Chase stiffened. I wanted to put my arms around him and tell him that I was sorry. So sorr

oved Kyle. Sorry that I couldn’t admit it sooner.

I took Chase’s hand and held it tight. He didn’t pull it away, but he didn’t hold mine either. H

ring straight ahead, his jaw set in pain or anger or both.

Despite Chase’s resentment, I watched as Kyle walked over to his mom and dad. They look

prised and happy to see him, I felt such joy I thought my heart would burst.

When Cherri gave her part in the program, Kyle smiled up at her, looking proud. I hoped he

uched by the meeting. I wondered if he remembered doing this when he was in Sunday Sch

ndered if he remembered church at all.

I had so many questions I wanted to ask him, but I was afraid I wouldn’t get the chance. Chasset. If I ran over to Kyle after the meeting, Chase would explode. He was so angry anyway. I cou

k making things worse.

When the meeting was over, I sat frozen in my seat. Chase didn’t move. I didn’t move. We watch

ne and Lauren and a couple of the other young adults welcomed Kyle to church. But Chase and I

ence.

“Why don’t you just go over to him?” Chase said at last. “I know that’s what you want to do.”

I stared him in the eye. “Why don’t you come with me?” I took his hand, trying to pull him alon



stayed in his seat.

“I can’t compete with him,” Chase said, sounding defeated.

I furrowed my brow, sitting back down beside him. “Chase, you don’t have to compete.”

“Look, just go be with him,” Chase said. “Because I can’t take this.”

He got up and walked away. I watched him storm off, for a moment too bewildered to move. My

s racing with anxiousness. I had caused this. It was my fault. On shaky legs, I followed after him chapel, and then out of the building.

“Chase—?!”

He whipped around. “I mean it Rain, go be with him. I’m breaking up with you—if we were

gether. It’s over.”

My lip quivered. “Chase, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean—”

“No? What did you mean? I can’t take being with you when I know you want to be with another

your eyes light up whenever he comes into your field of vision. How is that supposed to mak

l?”

“Not good,” I murmured.

“Yeah. Not good. In fact, it makes me feel rotten.” Chase set his jaw. “And the thing is, you’re

pid. The guy’s a criminal, Rain.”

I knew he was angry and in a lot of pain, but he was talking about Kyle—and he was doing it

ough that any passer by could hear.

“He’s not a criminal,” I hissed quietly. “He had tragic things happen to him—and no one to hel

t. He made bad choices.”

“Yeah? Well, now you’re making them,” Chase said and stormed away.

In disbelief, I watched him get into his car. Was this really happening? We were in a fight? Bre

like this? I turned away, ready to cry. In fact, I was crying, bawling.

I was sobbing into my hands when it happened. So, I didn’t see it. All I heard were the ho

unds. A car screeching out of the parking lot, then two cars colliding—one of them Chase’s.



CHAPTER 42

Everyone ran out of the building at the sound of the crash. I ran toward the accident, my

unding wildly. “Let him be alright,” I prayed. “Please, please let him be alright.”

I prayed it over and over.

But when I got close to Chase’s mangled car, smashed by the semi-truck, I knew he wouldnight. No one could be alright. Not in that mess. My heart stopped beating. It literally stopped. Be

n I saw it.

“No!” I screamed. “No!”

Chase’s twisted body lay on the ground, off to the side of the road.

“No! No!” I screamed over and over.

I wanted to run to Chase, throw my arms around him. But a man had a hold of me, stopping me.

“I saw it happen,” the man said. “The Mustang came out of nowhere and the truck rammed into i

y went flying through the windshield.”

“No!” I screamed again, slapping at the man, hitting him, scratching him. I had to get to Chase. I h

with him.

“You don’t want to go over there,” the man said. “There’s nothing you can do. He’s dead.”

“No!” I howled, sobbing, falling to my knees. This couldn’t be real. One minute Chase was t

e, screaming at me. The next he was dead? No. It was impossible. This wasn’t real, couldn’t be re

Kyle was suddenly at my side, taking me into his arms. He stroked my hair. “Rainy,” he whis

othingly. “Rain.”

Having Kyle beside me, feeling his hands, in a rush I felt warmth and a comfort in my heart, a m

peace. Peace! It didn’t make sense. But … Kyle brought that with his touch—suddenly, I realiz

ought it to me many times, in small doses. I hadn’t exactly realized it before, not exactly, but fincked—or I snapped. Kyle had a healing touch, a power … he had saved that dog. He did! H



sperately, I gripped on to that thought, clung to it. Kyle had to have a power. He had to! Because h

save Chase. Chase couldn’t be dead. He couldn’t.

“Help him!” I choked out. “Kyle, please. Help him.”

Kyle froze.

The man that held me still wouldn’t let me go or I would have pushed Kyle at Chase. Made him

tead, I begged. “Help him Kyle! Please, help him.”

Kyle flinched, shaking his head. “Rainy, I can’t.”

“It’s my fault, Kyle! Chase is dead and it’s my fault. We were having a fight and he sped off, mad

y fault he’s dead! Help him! Please!”

Kyle took a step back, shaking his head. “You don’t understand.”

“Kyle,” I screamed. “HELP HIM!”

He stood there looking at me, pale and torn. Finally, he took a deep breath and walked over to C

watched with uncertain hope, but hope just the same. I held my breath, watching him lean over Ch

eless body. And I saw it. The light that gathered over the two. It started out small and dim at K

nds, a tiny glimmer, but slowly it crept bigger and bigger, shimmering and glowing, first around

n Chase too, growing and growing until finally it burst into a miraculous light. It poured from the

them, from the sky, like the sun. Watching it sent a glorious feeling of peace through my body, thr

y soul.

It was scary and wonderful. It made me tremble, yet filled my heart with hope. I stood there hoy breath, hoping, hoping, hoping.

And then it happened.

Chase sat up, looking groggy. “What happened?”



CHAPTER 43

Chase was all right! An ambulance came and rushed him to the hospital where they made him

er night for “observation.” But he was fine. No bumps or bruises. No nothing.

It was a miracle.

That’s what the man that had been holding me back at the accident kept saying.

“It’s a miracle,” he’d gush to anyone that would listen. “That boy was dead, I tell you. I checke

lse myself. And his neck was broken.”

I guess the man didn’t see the huge bursting halo that formed around Chase. I guess no one did.

. But then, they weren’t linked to Kyle like me—they didn’t see his dreams—they didn’t se

adows or his lights. I wasn’t sure if that was lucky for them or unlucky. All I knew was, now I fe

er-effects of Kyle’s powers. Just like when he saved the dog. At the time it was happening,

diant joy and peace, but afterwards, now, I felt shaky and scarred, as if there was a dark spirit cout me.

But I was so glad to have Chase back, so glad, I could kind of ignore the feeling, pretty mu

ped that I didn’t go home where I would be alone. Instead, I stayed glued to Chase in his ho

om. We talked together as though the fight never happened, as though everything was won

ween us.

“I don’t even remember the accident,” Chase said when I questioned him about it. “I just came-to

le over me. Only, it was more like I woke up from a really great dream.”

I swallowed. “And you don’t remember anything?”

Chase shook his head. “I wouldn’t even believe I was in an accident—only my car’s totaled

eryone keeps saying they thought I was dead.”

I bit my lip, unable to speak.

Chase laughed. “Rain, relax. Everything’s cool. I’m fine.” He shuffled the deck of cards o

htstand. “Come on, I’ll play you another hand.”



I played cards with him until late at night, until the nurse told me I had to leave.

“Visiting hours are long over,” Nurse April said with a smile. “Go home. He’ll be released tomo

d you can play all of the cards that you want.”

But I didn’t want to leave. I couldn’t! I’d just lost him and it was a miracle that he was back.

aid if I left, something would happen. Something bad.

“Can’t I please just stay?” I begged. “I want to spend the night. I’ll sleep right here in this chair.”

But Nurse April shook her head, still smiling. “Go home, child. Your boyfriend is safe.”

So, I went home. But I didn’t feel safe. My parents were in Vermont again. Suddenly, I wished m

d a different job. One that would keep him at home. One where I never had to be alone, ever.

There were a lot of messages on the answering machine asking about Chase. None were from K

ught about calling him, thanking him. But I didn’t know exactly what to say. “ Thank you for bri

boyfriend back from the dead.” (???) I couldn’t do that. I just … couldn’t.

I wanted to go to Nine’s, just hang out with her. But she was babysitting. She was always babysit

I sighed, realizing I hadn’t eaten since breakfast. I went to the fridge and rummaged through it.

uldn’t eat. My stomach was in knots. What had I done? What had I asked Kyle to do? It made m

k … but I couldn’t let Chase just die. Be dead. I couldn’t. Only now … why did I feel this way

eped out. So scared.

There was a knock at the front door and I jumped about a mile in the air, hitting my head on th

elf of the refrigerator.

Kyle let himself in. “Are you okay?” he asked.

“Yeah. I’m okay,” I said, rubbing my head. “Just kind of a spaz.”

Kyle ignored that, looking distracted. “Is Chase okay?”

I gave him a sidelong look. “Yeah. He’s great. I guess he was … just stunned. Like the dog.”

Kyle sat at the kitchen table, straddling a chair. He stared at me unblinking. “How did you know?

I shook my head. “I didn’t, exactly.”

“But now you’re afraid of me?”

“Kyle, no. Of course not.” I sat down beside him, trying to reassure him. But I could still fe

esence of an evil spirit. “It’s bad, though, isn’t it?”

He nodded. “With the dog it wasn’t. I mean, it didn’t take much. But Chase … he was dead.”



I sat silent those words ringing in my head. He was dead. He was dead. Chase was dead.

“And the guy at the convenience store? The one you saved?”

Kyle nodded. “Yeah. He was dead too. But it was my fault, sort of. I mean, I was part of the ro

en if I was in the car. I had to save him. I had to do whatever I could.”

“And … what happened?”

Kyle shook his head. “You don’t want to know.”

I swallowed, knowing that was true. I didn’t. I really, really didn’t. But, want to or not, it seem

eded to know. “Kyle, what’s going to happen now?”

He was silent, staring at the table. “I don’t know. I might have to go back with them.”

My heart caught in my throat. I felt sick. “Back with who?”

Kyle raised his hands. “Them.”

I didn’t know what he was talking about. The evil spirits? The ones I could feel in the room? O

mons in our dreams? Or were they somehow one and the same? I didn’t know how to ask. I couldn

loud. It caught in my throat.

But Kyle seemed to be able to read my thoughts. “The demons from my dreams—I’m linked to

mehow too. I hear them sometimes—just like my dad. But I try to hide from them—hide you from

usually works. But every time I use my powers,” he bit his lip, wincing, “it makes them remember

I shook my head, that wasn’t right. That couldn’t be right. “No, Kyle! When you brought that dog

I felt like something good was around, you glowed! It couldn’t have been demons. It was som

od.”

Kyle nodded. “Yeah. It was. It was something good. When I call, something good helps me. Bu

mething bad always follows. It’s like I have both sides—good and bad—pulling for me.” He ra

nds through his hair, looking anxious. “You know, just like how I’m linked to you, but to my dad

s like you both tug at me—one wanting me to do good, the other wanting me to do evil. And I d

out you both. I’m drawn to you, Rain—but it seems like my soul is with my dad—the demons.” K

nds fisted. He looked desperate, despondent. “I don’t know why that is. I don’t want it to be that w

It broke my heart that he thought that. “Kyle, it’s not. You’re good. I told you, you glow.”

Kyle rose to his feet, obviously not convinced, not even close. “Look, I need to go. Lock your do

“No!” I reached for his hand. “Kyle, stay.”

He winced, giving my hand a gentle squeeze. “Don’t ask me that. I can’t.”

I was shaking. Really bad. I didn’t want him to leave. Having him close made me feel safe. “



hy won’t you just stay?”

He stared at me a moment, saying nothing. “Rain, I don’t know what’s going to happen. But it’s

be bad. When I use my powers, it lets them find me. With the dog it wasn’t that bad. He was a do

mal. But with the guy in the convenience store …”

“What! What happened?”

Kyle shook his head. “Look, you need to stay away from me—at least for a while, okay? B

ything happens to me tonight—anything—remember what I said, it doesn’t matter—I came bac

u.” He started to walk away, but turned back to me at the door. “Rain, don’t come to my house toni

omise me. Stay here. Don’t leave.”

I nodded, trying to keep the hysteria growing inside me at bay, stay calm. But what was happe

hat had I done? Those dark spirits or demons—the cloaked entities from my nightmares—they

ming for Kyle? Is that what he was saying?

From my living room window, I watched Kyle until I saw him reach his porch. I watched him

front steps with his head in his hands. I watched him for a long time, watched him gaze up at my th a worried expression. But I knew he couldn’t see me. I was standing in the dark.

Finally, I ran up to my room. I went to my window to see if Nine’s house was lit up, but it was

s completely dark. Her family probably went to their grandmother’s house. They went there a

ery weekend.

I didn’t know what to do. It was late, but I knew I couldn’t sleep, not tonight, never again. I w

am about those cloaked demons. I knew I would, for sure. And what was going on at Kyle’s?

s happening to him? I glanced over. His house was lit up. It looked quiet, peaceful. He was drawiporch. Just seeing him made me feel better. He was safe. Maybe I was safe.

I got out my laptop and crawled into bed trying not to think about the last time I wrote in my jo

ying not to think of the scary message. Before tonight I tried telling myself it wasn’t real. But now

e it was. All of it. ‘Cause Kyle had brought the dog back from the dead, and there were scary cl

ople out there. Only, they weren’t coming for me, like in my dreams. They were coming for Kyle

parently, it was my fault. I made him save Chase.

But the message said they were coming for me I typed on my laptop.

And then the nightmare began.



CHAPTER 44

As I was typing in my journal, I caught a strange movement from the corner of my eye. Star

nced up. Then froze. I saw something—a shadow. I was pretty sure. It zoomed across my wall—

t, like lightening—then it was gone.

My heart pounded so hard against my chest it hurt. Did I really see that? Did I? It happened so

sn’t quite sure what I saw— if I saw it.

Freaked beyond belief, I gazed around my room, but no one was there. Where was Moo? I w

oo! Why hadn’t I brought him up with me? I was going to race downstairs and get him, but just then

Another shadow went zooming across my wall!

Stunned, I couldn’t move. Or breathe.

Whoosh!

Suddenly shadows were gushing from my walls, scattering like roaches. Terrified, I screa

ambling to the center of my room. My heart was thundering in my ears. I couldn’t find my door th

nightmare of black. I couldn’t! Instead, I huddled away from my four walls, away from the dark c

sitive I was going to faint.

“Help me,” I silently prayed.

To my horror, the shadows were whispering. Their voices were quick and hushed—murmur, mu

urmur. Trembling, I covered my ears, trying to block out their menacing noise. But my hands aking so bad, it was like holding a jack-hammer against my ears. It was useless. I could still hea

adows—hear their nightmarish murmurs.

“Help me. Please, help me.”

I gasped, crying, finally realizing what the shadows were saying. They were whispering my name

d over, “Rain Tolley, Rain Tolley, Rain Tolley,” like a chant.

The chaos was so menacing, so horrible; it sent me flying for the door.



“Help me!”

I was ready to claw my way out if I had to. I grappled through the shadows, finally getting my

the knob. My heart pulsing, I twisted and twisted, but the door wouldn’t budge. The shadows ar

ities, weighing on it, trying to keep me in.

“Please Heavenly Father, help me!”

With every ounce of strength I possessed (and some that I didn’t) I finally managed to pry a

ck. Frantically, I squeezed my way through the tiny passage, getting an exiting glimpse of my room

nt. All four of my walls were a frenzied mass of black.



CHAPTER 45

Kyle burst through my front door as I ran downstairs.

“Run!” I gasped.

He didn’t though, he held the door wider for me, his eyes cutting upstairs.

“Rain, come on!” he urged and I jumped the last of the stairs, sprinting to him in a wild panic. W

t the door together, him pulling me along.

“Rain, I didn’t see anything—nothing. I had this feeling, though.” Kyle put his arms around me. “

ppened? Are you okay?”

Out of breath, I shook my head. But I didn’t stop running. I didn’t stop until we were in his hous

door shut. And locked. Not that that made any difference. Shadows didn’t seem to need a key.

We sat at his kitchen table and I told him about the shadows. He listened with such a look of a

t I wished I didn’t have to tell him. I knew he felt responsible. Only they were in my house; inf

y house.

Kyle ran his hands through his hair. He looked haunted. “I’m sorry, Rain. I tried hiding you from

and them from you.”

I never told him about the spooky messages I’d been getting, the ones that appeared and vanish

ll. So, he didn’t know “they” knew about me. Whoever they were—dark spirits? Demons?

Kyle wrapped his arms around his stomach as though he was in pain. “I guess they found you be

u’re linked to me. I’m sorry.” He shook his head. “I was hoping they couldn’t get to you.”

He was silent a moment, contemplating. “I’ll just go back with them,” he said at last, making me

went on, trying to explain. “That’s really all they want—just me. Anyone else—it’s ju

nishment.”

My stomach knotted. He was twisting it with his words. “Go back with them? Go back where?”

Kyle licked his lips, hesitating. He rubbed his face in his hands. “I don’t know. I’m not sure. I



ghtmares—those spirits, they say I’m one of them. Rain, I believe them. I have flashes—memories

th them. I’m … part of them.”

I shook my head, crying. This was crazy. He was talking crazy. “No you’re not.”

“Rain, I think I am. When I use those powers … they find me. And they found you, because o

cause I’m linked to them too.” He looked away. “I’m sorry.” He ran his hands through his hair.

ng time, he was silent, then he looked into my eyes. “I’m sorry I’m not who you thought.”

“Kyle,” I grabbed his arms, making him listen to me. “You are who I thought. You have good in y

u’re good. I see you glow—you’re not evil!” A sob escaped my lips, but then I quickly went on. “A

ose bad spirits think you’re theirs, they’re wrong. Kyle, you glowed at church, you glowed whe

ved Chase—you can fight the bad spirits.”

Kyle shook his head. “Rain, you don’t understand. I can’t fight them. In my dreams, when they’r

, I don’t even want to fight them—it’s like I know,” he drew tiny little cloaked people on a n

“they’re part of me. Right now, sitting with you, I don’t want anything to do with them, nothing. B

like … like they’re my family. And when they’re near, they become everything I want.”

I was crying harder now. “Kyle, this is crazy. You’re not one of them. Maybe you’re linked to the

ay? Maybe you’re right about that. But if you’re linked to bad spirits—I promise you Kyle, y

ked to good ones too.”

He nodded, drawing an angel. “Yeah, maybe. But the good ones are like a tiny little whisper i

ad, or my heart—the dark ones, they’re loud.”

“Kyle,” I took his hand, linking my fingers through his. “You need to listen to the whispers.”

He sat back in his chair. “Right. But they’re hard to hear, Rain. I mean, right now they’re not, wit

an hear them—but you can’t hold my hand forever, Rain. Especially because it doesn’t seem lik

rk spirits are going to let you.” He stroked my hair softly. “Rain, I can’t let them hurt you.”

***

We decided we needed to talk to Hanna. We needed to know why the dark spirits where link

le—why he thought he belonged to them.

“She won’t talk to me, though,” Kyle said as he handed me his jacket.

“No,” I agreed. “She won’t talk to me either. But she’ll talk to Chase. We need to stop at the ho

d get him.”

Kyle blinked. “Take him out of the hospital?”



“Kyle, he’s totally fine.” I couldn’t help beaming about that. I mean, it was scary; it made me trem

o think about, but Kyle had saved him. Kyle had preformed a miracle! That was not evil. Tha

esome. “Fine—thanks to you. Believe me, he can leave the hospital.”

Kyle opened his car door for me. “Okay, so he can do it, but will he? The guy thinks Hanna is cr

I sighed. “Yeah. He thinks I’m crazy too.”

***

When Kyle and I got to the hospital, we by-passed the reception desk, going straight up to Ch

om. He was reading a book when we got there, but seeing us, he put it down, eyeing us warily. “He

He kept his eyes on Kyle’s jacket. Grrr! I was still wearing it. I had the impulse to explain—ex

t I’d had to run out of my house without grabbing my jacket—explain about the shadows. But I ase would think I was crazy if I started in about the shadows. He would call the mental ward.

So, I didn’t explain. Instead, I just leaned from one foot to the other, knowing this was going

dly, wishing I’d come up with a different plan. One that didn’t involve Chase.

“Hey, Chase,” I said hesitantly. “We need a favor.”

Chase shrugged warily. He was all stiff. “I have a note for you,” he said. “I wrote it after you lef

day. Read it and then I’ll do whatever ‘favor’ you want.”

I took a deep breath, hobbling over to him with shaky legs. I was afraid to read his note. H

ing all stiff and formal. I knew what he wrote was going to make me cry.

When I reached Chase’s bed he took my hand as he handed me the letter. “Before you read this, w

favor?”

I took a deep breath. “We need you to talk to Hanna.”

Chase let go of my hand, looking resigned. “Read the note.”

“Uh … I’m going to get a soda,” Kyle said.

“No.” Chase shook his head. “Rain, read it alone.”

***



Biting my lip, I read Chase’s note on the couch in the empty waiting room.

Dear Rain,

I feel lame doing this in a note, but I can’t face you to tell you this. I just wanted to say

I’m sorry about the way I handled things. The church parking lot wasn’t the place for our

I wish there hadn’t been a fight at all.

But like I said this afternoon, I can’t compete. Only that’s okay, I guess. The guy n

your help. I know that. So help him. Be there for him. Do whatever you need.

The thing is though, since my car accident I feel different somehow. I see things

clearly. We’re not right for each other, you and me, not anymore. You have things going

your life that I don’t understand. You let Hanna get to you. I don’t understand that and I

help you with that. Right now it seems you have a lot of problems and I don’t mean

insensitive, but I can’t help you with them, any of them. But I’ll try. I’ll be here for you,

always—but not as your boyfriend. As a friend that cares about you. Deeply.

Chase.

Reading Chase’s note brought new tears to my eyes. I sat on the couch, bawling. But it made m

ter, too—his note. He didn’t hate me. He understood. It was as though he was setting me free.

It wasn’t that dating Chase had become a burden. It hadn’t, of course. But I had started t

pped. In my heart, I’d known it was time to end things, only I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I d

nt to hurt him. I couldn’t hurt him. But of course, I hurt him anyway.

Suddenly, I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye. It whisked me out of my reverie,

sn’t a cloaked demon, so my heart calmed. A little. It was Hanna. She was watching me from

lway.

“We need to talk,” she said.



CHAPTER 46

I blinked in astonishment, shocked to see Hanna. “We were going to go to your house to talk to yo

“I know,” she said impatiently. “I just talked to Kyle in Chase’s room. I didn’t come here to ta

u two, though, if that’s what you’re thinking. I didn’t know you were here. If I’d known, I wouldn’t

me.”

She said all this matter-of-factly as we walked to Chase’s room. She was walking ahead o

king quietly, as though afraid we were going to get in trouble—or call up scary demons.

She went on in her hushed monotone. “I came to see how Chase was. I heard he was in a ho

cident.” She looked back at me closely, suspiciously. “I heard it was really bad.”

I swallowed. “Yeah, it was.” I bit my lip, afraid to add more, but I choked out a lie anyway. “

ky to be alive.”

But luck had nothing to do with it and Hanna seemed to know that. She looked back at m

lying, just lifting an eyebrow.

When we got to Chase’s room, Hanna took center stage. She went up to Chase and took his

dying his palm. Chase watched her with a furrowed brow. “What are you doing?”

Hanna held Chase’s palm in front of his face. “You asked me why I freaked out back in the e

ade after I looked at your palm. This is why.” She pointed at something on his palm. “This is you

e. I didn’t want to tell you what I saw there, that you would die soon—around seventeen—so I av

u for years. But then, last month, Mrs. Peterson made us be dance partners for the Rumba, remem

w your palm again—your life-line wasn’t short anymore. It just had a little jag—it was altered.”

Chase stared at her like she was nuts. But Kyle and I knew exactly what she was talking abou

th gawked at her, amazed. Hanna knew things.

She sighed, placing Chase’s hand back down on his bed. She half-caressed it, seeming sad to r

re was no way Chase would believe anything she said. “I’m glad you’re alright,” she murmured g

him, then she glanced at Kyle and me. “Maybe we should let him rest.”



She pursed her lips. “We can talk outside,” she told Kyle and me, “for a minute. That’s it.”

The three of us said goodnight to Chase at the door. He gave me a lingering look and I went back

him. I took his hand in mine, just holding it. He had died today; the thought sent shivers throug

de me want to cling to him, never let him go.

“I’m glad you’re alright, too,” I whispered and kissed his cheek. Tears welled in my eyes.

ways love you, Chase.”

***

Hanna and Kyle were waiting for me outside of Chase’s room. They silently led me to the n

irway doors, apparently deciding that was where we should talk—away from the hospital worker

ir constant reminders that visiting hours were over.

We sat on the steps in the dimly lit stairwell. The place was completely desolate. It was c

ough without the topic we were going to discuss. Every tiny hair on the back of my neck stood on e

waited for Hanna to speak and finally end the despondent silence.

“You have exactly one question,” Hanna said. “Then I’m gone, because you guys have dark s

er you and no way am I going to be part of that.”

A chill ran through me hearing her say that, hearing it aloud.

I swallowed. “That’s what we want to know about, Hanna. Why are dark spirits after Kyle?”

Hanna took a deep breath, muttering.

“Okay,” she finally said with a note of resign. “Both of you come here.”

Kyle and I sat side-by-side on the step below Hanna’s. Kyle’s eyes sought mine, looking tende

ncerned as he took my hand comfortingly in his, apparently knowing this was going to be bad.

In silence, Hanna closed her eyes. Hesitantly, she put her shaking hands on our shoulders. A cond later, her eyes flew open wide in terror. She practically leaped down the stairs, gasping a

mbled to her feet.

Visibly shaking, she stared at me with horror, backing away toward the door. “They’re after

in. They want him, but you’re in their way. They see you as a threat. You’re keeping them from

e to get to Kyle. They’re after you.”



CHAPTER 47

Kyle and I sat in stunned silence after Hanna left. His hand still held mine, so big and strong, yet

me time, incredibly gentle and tender. It soothed me, almost warming the frightened chill that ran u

wn my spine. Almost.

Sitting with him like that, so close, with our fingers locked; helped me like nothing else po

uld. I felt safe, comforted; as though nothing bad could happen to me if he just stayed near.

Kyle’s phone vibrated in his pocket. I could feel it.

“Are you going to get it?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.

Kyle shook his head slightly. “I wasn’t going to. I’d have to let go of your hand.”

I bit my lip, going to go along with that logic. I didn’t want him to let go. But as we sat together

ence, the vibrating continued, making me anxious. “Maybe you should get it.”

Kyle reluctantly let go of my hand. He fished through his pocket for his phone, then flipped it ope

t his lips. “I must not have had phone reception out in the hospital. I have three voice messages

t from Hanna.”

“Read the text,” I advised.

Maybe Hanna had good news for us—for once. Maybe driving home, she suddenly realized she h

ant anything she said. She’d gotten her spirit lines crossed or something. Fat chance, I thought

ssed my fingers anyway.

Kyle exhaled a breath. “This is what Hanna says: ‘The demons see you— which is me —as their

hey don’t stop Rain, she’ll ruin their plans. She’ll lead you and others to do great things on e

ey can’t have that. You’re theirs.’”

Kyle flicked me a look with a grim expression. Without waiting for me to comment, or utter a

put his phone on speaker and clicked on his voicemail. The first message was from the county p

ying Kyle’s father had escaped from the mental institution earlier this evening. The second was fro

ntal hospital saying the same thing. The third was from the police again, “If you get this mes



ase stay in your home with the doors locked. We’re sending a police car over immediately.”

My heart slammed against my chest. Stan had escaped! The nightmare just went on and on.

Kyle flipped off the phone, biting his lip. He offered me his hand and helped me to my feet. “I’

police,” he said as we started down the stairs. “Tell them we’re on our way.”

My heart was pounding like crazy. “Maybe we should just stay here,” I said. “Stan won’t kn

ok here. Maybe if—”

I stopped, frozen in my tracks, my heart about to pounce out of my chest. The whole bottom sta

s filled with bats. Bats! They were everywhere—on the ceiling, on the rails, on the ground. They

iting for us, silent and watching.

Clutching my stomach, I took a step back. Kyle reached for me, cautiously trying to stop me, b

on as I took the step, a bat swooped at me, making me scream and duck for cover. It grazed my

rely missing my head and I screamed again.

“Don’t move,” Kyle whispered—in my head rather than my ears … it seemed. It seemed his cace was communicating with me through his thoughts rather than aloud. I stared at him, wide-eye

s talking in my head!

Kyle slowly, cautiously, helped me stand back to an upright position. Then, with his hand still cl

mine, he guardedly maneuvered in front of me, seeming to want to shield me from the monstrous h

fore us, as though that was possible.

He gave my hand a comforting squeeze, then let it go, taking another step forward. Trembl

uffled my feet ready to follow him down, but Kyle’s voice rang through my head, Rain no! Gaspruptly stopped, but the bats looked ready to attack any moment. Fluttering their wings, they l

ward as though set to pounce.

“Okay,” Kyle spoke aloud, startling me out of my terror-induced trance. “It’s me you want,” he c

t. “Leave her alone and I’ll go with you—willingly.”

My knees buckled. What? No! No, no, no!

A whimper escaped my lips. Kyle shook his head ever so slightly, as though not wanting the b his movements, but warning me not to make another sound. He reached back at me in a shi

nner, but his gaze stayed straight ahead at the army of bats.

Kyle wet his lips, then called out, “I’m yours!”

At that, the bats took off—all of them—zooming in flight toward Kyle. But somehow, as they

y changed into shadows, darting into Kyle’s body as though he was made of gelatin. They were

inside him. I could see his eyes growing darker and darker with each new shadow that infiltrate

dy.



I watched in sickened horror, too terrified to move, Hanna’s warning washing through me in w

atch out Rain! The dark spirits can mess with his head, control him. Chills ran through me, rea

t’s what was happening now. Soon, nothing would be left of Kyle.

“Run!” Kyle shouted in my head as demon after demon swooped inside him.

Stumbling back, I watched his eyes darken, darken, darken, until he was no longer Kyle.

Finally, I ran.



CHAPTER 48

Though I wanted to, I couldn’t run down the stairs to escape. That was where the shadows

tead, I ran up, up, up, until I was on the roof and there was nowhere else to run.

Panting and out of breath, I stood for a moment, dazed by the crisp night air. The wind ripped in

e and ears, whipping my hair against my cheeks, like a slap, waking me up.

I need to block the door, I thought frantically, so Kyle can’t come through it. He’s full of dem

w. He’s one of them!

My heart exploded with pain at the realization. There was no more kind Kyle looking after me,

ain. No Kyle. It made me want crumble to the ground and cry, give up—on everything. But Kyl

ved me! I couldn’t let that be for nothing. I couldn’t. I had to fight. I had to be strong.

There was a tiny little latch above the handle. I bolted it shut, though I knew that couldn’t hold an

ck, not for long.

I need to block the door , I thought frantically.

My heart pounding, I shoved the hair out of my face, looking around the desolate rooftop. The

wled around me, stinging my face, making it hard to see. Continually shoving my hair back, my

pt returning to the huge garbage dumpster not too far from the door. It was enormous, looked wa

avy to budge, but it seemed to be the only moveable object on the roof.

Frantically, I raced to it, straining to push it toward the door.

“Need help with that?”

I jumped as a man came out of the shadows. He was smoking a cigarette. He flashed a smile a

king again, “Need help?”

I didn’t say anything. I clenched my stomach, feeling uneasy though he started helping me pus

s really strong, but now I wasn’t sure I wanted the door blocked.

“Rain?” I could hear Kyle pounding on the door. “Rain, let me in.”



The guy smiled. “Angry boyfriend?”

I bit my lip, the knot in my stomach twisting. Did I want the door blocked? Did I? Kyle was o

her side of it, calling me, beating at the lock. It wasn’t my Kyle. His voice sounded frantic and ec

d otherworldly, not exactly Kyle’s, but still maybe slightly Kyle. What was I planning on doin

naged to barricade the door from him? Stay up here with this guy all night? No, I couldn’t. Him

re filled me with a creepy, sick sensation though I wasn’t sure why. Maybe simply because we

ne and he had startled me, seeming to come out of nowhere.

“I—I needed to call 9-1-1,” I said. “Do you have a cell phone?”

“Oh, no, sorry,” he said, still smiling. “They don’t let me have a cell phone.”

My stomach dropped. I clutched at it tighter, almost doubling over. “… They?”

“Yeah. The mental hospital. Where I live.”

I screamed, jumping away from the guy. Totally hysterical, I ran in lurches, not knowing where t

ere was nowhere to go. We were on a roof. Any direction I ran brought me to a ledge. Still, I ranmy might, the wind cutting into my face as I zig-zaged across the roof just trying to get away fro

y—Stan. Stan, who wanted to dance on my grave, Stan who tried to kill me. But there was nowh

Stan was backing me closer and closer to the ledge, his eyes gleaming. I swallowed gaspin

eath, too horrified to find it as Stan stepped closer still, whipping out a knife. He smiled movi

fe from hand to hand. “Know what’s coming?”

Swirly spots zoomed before my eyes and I wobbled, knowing I was going to faint any momentnd stung my cheeks, whipped my hair, making me pull it back, though from the corner of my eye I

l see him smile.

“I have to kill you,” he said, slowly wielding the knife at me. “I have to make the voices stop.”

I swallowed, trying to calm my heart, to get my frantic, terror-filled mind to work. I had to get h

k, to think clearly, rationally. I chocked out, “The voices want me dead?”

“They want you dead very, very badly.”

I looked back at the ground behind me. There wasn’t much space left between me and the ledge.

they want me dead?”

Stan widened his eyes, as though I should already know this. “Your testimony—your blog. The

bad. You have people follow you—my son. He’ll follow you.” Stan jabbed his knife at me, b

sn’t close enough yet. He was still a few feet away, but he didn’t seem to be seeing too well and

med unsteady, as though his thoughts were somewhere else, somewhere far away. He lo

tressed. “My son—who I killed with this knife.”



Somehow, as Stan and I were talking, Kyle managed to barge through the door. Stan turned to

oking awed.

“Son! I’m sorry I killed you,” Stan howled. “It was the voices—they wanted you. They still wan

n! You have a strength that they want—the power. They want you to be their leader. All you have

kill her. Then you’ll be their king!”

Stan held out his knife to Kyle. “You’re one of them anyway, son. Do it. Kill her!”

Kyle seemed to be in a strange trance. His dark, shadow-filled eyes glistened at the knife.

“No Kyle!” I whimpered. “Fight them, Kyle!”

But he wasn’t Kyle. The shadows had taken over his body. I could see it in his eyes. He was p

m now, under their spell—like he said, when he was with them, he couldn’t fight them—they be

that he wanted; everything he wanted. And now they were inside him—taking over his brain.

Still, Kyle tilted his head at me, as though he heard my words—they just didn’t make sense. “

le,” I begged. “Pray! You have good in you! Pray!”

Angrily, Stan was yelling over my words. “Take my knife, son!” he shouted. “Kill her! You w

ve the conflict anymore—the pain. You can be free to be you—their king. Kill her!”

Kyle took a step toward the knife, but then stopped, staring at something on the back of his hand.

I blinked, suddenly my heart full of hope, realizing with a rush of tingles it was his CTR ri

med to be glowing!

Kyle stared at the ring a moment, transfixed. Then he stared up at the knife in his father’s h

king confused.

“Kill her, son!” Stan chanted. “Kill her!”

Kyle tilted his head again, watching the knife; squinting his eyes. Then suddenly, he charged

arged fast and furious.

My heart froze.

“No!” I fell to my knees, crying.

At the last second, I realized it wasn’t the knife Kyle was running for. Kyle was charging at his f

full force.

No! My heart plummeted as I realized what was going to happen.

“No!” I screamed as Kyle plowed into his father … knocking them both off the building.

My world tilted. Everything around me went black.



CHAPTER 49

I woke in a foggy-cozy-haze, cradled in Kyle’s arms. We were outside, in the dark. Why?

“What happened?” I murmured, staring into his warm brown eyes, totally confused. But eve

ked the question, the horrifying memories accosted me, sending violent shivers through my bo

tched Kyle’s arm, trying to sit up, my eyes bugging out of my head. “You fell over the ledge!”

The world twirled around me and Kyle gently tugged me back down, nestling me back into his

it with me, Rain. Rest.”

I gasped. “But I saw—you died.”

Kyle squeezed my hand sympathetically, biting at a sad, small smile. “I was already dead, R

n’t die again.”

I stared up at him with a confused ache in my heart, shaking uncontrollably, waiting for him to g

plain what I was afraid I already knew.

Kyle gently ran his hands through my hair, gazing into my eyes with a far-away look. “My dad

a long time ago—when he killed my mom. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Rain—I couldn’t tell y

dn’t even know—not exactly.”

Shivers ran through me. “Dead? All this time, you were dead?”

Kyle nodded, looking as though he was in agony having to tell me this. “But when I came back

I didn’t know why. Not at the time. I was sent back to Roger, and all of my memories before I

th him and my mom—they were gone. It was because I promised the demons I’d go with th

omised them my soul for my mom’s. When we died, I promised them that. But they tricked me.”

bbed his forehead. “But I didn’t know that then. I didn’t know my mom would’ve had the chance to

aven. I didn’t know—like you said—God forgives. He would have forgiven her.”

Kyle wet his lips. “But they tricked me, and I was supposed to go with them, only you kept pr

d wishing me back—and because they tricked me, my spirit wasn’t really theirs—not totally t

d so, because of you, I got to come back—only they took away all my memories—all my memor

d or you or anything good. I came back not knowing, until I read your blog.” Kyle stared into my

ut like I told you, Rain. It doesn’t matter what happens to me. I came back for you.”



I squeezed my eyes shut, tears welling in them. I couldn’t get past what he said at the very begin

ou’re … dead?”

Paling, Kyle nodded.

I fainted again.



CHAPTER 50

I woke in my bed with the sun shining through my windows. I swallowed, remembering everyth

shadows, Kyle, I even remembered fainting in his arms. But now I was home, safe in my bed. Ho

et here? Did Kyle bring me? I had the warm sensation that he probably did. But with it came dre

ll, the memory that he was dead washing over me anew. It made my heart ache. I clutched

ddenly feeling lost, and frightened, wondering what became of him now?—now that his father was

d he overcame the demons, was his time on earth finished? Did he go away … forever?

A loud whimper escaped my lips and I covered my face with my hands. He couldn’t be gonuldn’t.

I jumped out of bed. I had to go to Kyle’s house. Now. I had to see that he was there. He had

re. He couldn’t be gone. Not forever. He couldn’t.

Was it too early to rush to his house, though? Would I wake his parents … again? I looked a

ck, then abruptly sat back down on my bed, confused. Whoa. It was after three in the afternoon.

ee. I had slept all day! Mom didn’t wake me for school. Why?

I furrowed my brow, baffled, but then I noticed the note mom had left on my nightstand.

Sweetie, Kyle said you had quite a fright last night. I’m so thankful you’re safe and all is

st take it easy today, Honey. You’ve had quite a trauma and it seems to have taken its toll—

azy talk you’ve been mumbling in your sleep! Get your rest and I’ll be home soon. I’m just g

w to run a few errands and pick up a prescription for you that the doctor prescribed. Love, M

My first impulse was still to rush to Kyle’s house; to make sure was there. He has to be there!

I tossed down Mom’s note and started stuffing on my shoes, but then it dawned on me that I s

obably get dressed. I thoroughly didn’t want to take the time, but it seemed obligational. I r

ough my drawers, grabbing items at random, slipping them on without bothering to turn things r

e out.

When the doorbell rang, I jumped to my window, throwing back the curtains. My heart soared. I

le! He wasn’t gone! He was holding something behind his back, looking up at me. I waved, then

wn my stairs two at a time and threw open the door.

“Kyle!” I gushed, hardly able to resist the urge to fling my arms around him. “I was afraid you



ne!”

He bit off a puzzled grin, but only asked gently, “How you doing Rain?”

“I’m good—wonderful. So happy to see you!”

He was still smiling, still looking puzzled. “Good.”

We stared at each other like that a long time, both of us just smiling, brimming with happiness. W

s brimming. He seemed to be too. He tilted his head, still smiling. “Where did you think I went?”

Flushing, I blinked, not wanting to say.

He smiled again, making me all warm and toasty inside, seeming to understand. “I’m here, Rain

d gently. He played with a lock of my hair. “You wished me back. Apparently, I’m back for good

bbed the back of his neck. “Well, at least for a while—I’m not going anywhere.”

Tingles ran through me. I wondered if he could feel them. I wanted to ask what he was—a ghos

gel? But I got the feeling he didn’t know. He was brought back to earth without any memories—giond chance because he had just been an innocent kid that had been tricked. Now he had both

ing for him—good and evil. He was more susceptible to “otherworld” stuff because he didn’t

ong to our world. It seemed he was fairly entrenched to the world beyond (he could bring people

m the dead!), but he didn’t exactly “belong” to that world either … apparently. Anyway, it d

tter to me. Ghost, angel, hot teenager, troubled half-demon—he was Kyle.

To me he was an angel—my angel.

He studied my hands clutched over my heart, then my face. “You seem a lot better—I mean,ter,” he said. “Your mom was worried about you. I spent most of the day here, worried too,

eded to go home for a little while. I needed to do something to help you feel better. So … I mad

s.” Kyle held up a jar of liquid.

“Is that …?”

“Yeah,” he smiled. “Chicken soup.”

I laughed with happiness. And amazement. It was so sweet.

Kyle explained, “You made it for me when I wasn’t feeling well. It made me feel better.”

“Have some with me,” I urged, pulling him into the house. “I want to talk with you.”

Kyle sat with me at the kitchen table. “You seem so much better,” he said. “Did you and Chase

? You were talking in your sleep—about a fight before his crash.”

“Oh!” My cheeks flamed. What else had I said? I played with a napkin on the table. “We broke u

okay. Really. He wrote me a note. He seems to understand about me liking you and—”



“Wait,” Kyle raised his eyebrows, “you like me?”

I looked up at him, embarrassed how that had come out. Of course he had no idea. I had never s

rd—everything happened so fast, and there was always Chase.

My heart beat all fluttery. “… Yeah. I do. A lot.”

“But …” Kyle seemed confused, “you’re always trying set me up with your friends.”

“Yeah, well … I wanted you with a nice, sweet girl.”

Kyle smiled, his eyes twinkling as he took my hand. “Well, then I guess you’re getting what you w



NOVELS By Melanie Marks:

The Dating Deal

When Kyle Came Back

A Demon’s KissHis Kiss



Author Bio:

Melanie Marks was born and raised in California. She is married to a naval nuclear submarine o

d blessed with three amazingly terrific kids.

Melanie has had over sixty short stories published in magazines such as Highlights, Woman’s W

d Teen Magazine as well as in various anthologies, many being Chicken Soup for the Soul b

e’s had six children’s books published and four teen novels, THE DATING DEAL; WHEN K

ME BACK; HIS KISS; and A DEMON’S KISS. More teen novels are forthcoming in the fall of

ch as THE STRANGER INSIDE and more.

Melanie enjoys reading in the bathtub, writing in bed, and living in a house longer than two

melanie marks when kyle came back 2

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