MarriageFire.com

Strong Marriages Getting Stronger

Were you dragged here?

Our Story – Lori & Tom Penton• We started dating in 1989• Married in 1994• We have 3 kids: Aly (14), Brock (12), Eva (8)• We live in Prior Lake• We attend church at Hosanna!, Lakeville (since

2000)• We love to take vacations, go out on the boat,

and watch sports together

Our Story – Lori & Tom Penton

• Discovered Love Languages and it changed our marriage!

• Became involved with a small group, mission trips, Dudes’ Group, retreats

• We became stronger as a couple• Meanwhile, our friends began divorcing• Why?

Decline of the American Family

Kid-Centric Crazy

A vision came to me to help counter divorce, to build a tool to strengthen marriages

Our Story (it’s a long one) Lori & Tom Penton

• 2008 - Slowly, but surely, MarriageFire community is building

• 2011 - Aligned with Alpha and The Marriage Course

• Fall of 2011 - Lori diagnosed with breast cancer

• Spring 2012 – Energized and ready to move forward – encouraging marriages

• Here we are today

How did they get so strong?

How did they get so strong?

How did they get so strong?

How did they get so strong?

How did they get so strong?

How did they get so strong?

STRENGTH

• Invest in the gym and eat right, you will be fit.• Invest in your marriage and work at it, your

marriage will be stronger.• What you are doing right now, is equivalent of

going to the gym for your marriage. We applaud you! It all adds up!

• Why stigma with working on marriage?• TMC Husband Story – “I thought we had a

good marriage?”

MarriageFire.comWhere did MarriageFire come from?

MarriageFire.com

“MarriageFire.com is the perfect companion to The Marriage Course. It’s one thing to talk about marriage best practices. MarriageFire helps put them into action, striving to keep your marriage strong, well after the course is over." – Derek and Cathy Rust, Directors The Marriage

Course USA

Brain Storm

• Write down some LIFE goals (5 mins).• Dream travel destinations, a marathon, bucket

list, sky diving, etc. • Share/discuss with your spouse (5 mins).

MarriageFire AnalogyThe start of any hot romantic relationship.

MarriageFire AnalogyWhat happens when you sit back and do nothing.

MarriageFire AnalogyKeep working at it and enjoy.

TMC Reflection

Taking Stock of Your Marriage Revisit Exercise 1

TMC Reflection

• Session 1 – Building Strong Foundations.• This is the primary area of TMC that MarriageFire

reinforces.• How are you doing since the course?• Are you going on a weekly date night?• Are you connecting daily?• Are you speaking each other’s love languages

daily?• Are you in the comfort zone?• Comfort zone = Fade zone.

Brain Storm

• Write down some objectives that you would love to see accomplished in next 12 months. (5 mins).

• Share/discuss with your spouse (5 mins).

Expectations – Reality = DisillusionmentNormal to come out of seminar fired up.

Expectations – Reality = DisillusionmentNormal to go back in comfort zone.

Expectations – Reality = Disillusionment

Fade kicks in – tiny steps each day turn into miles.

• The best businesses constantly bench mark/measure themselves. So should marriages

Session 1 – Making Time

• We need reminders.• We need a plan.• We need to be held accountable.• You build a list/Outlook/plan at work, why

wouldn’t you do the same for your marriage?

Get a greater understanding of each other – The ‘WishList’

Self Centered to Others Centered“Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also tothe interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that ofChrist Jesus.” (Philippians 2:4-5 NIV)

“You are most like Christ when you ask, “What are her/his needs, andhow can I meet them?” When you're angry, you're preoccupied withyourself. But when you're like Christ, you look to each other's interestsand not merely your own.” - Pastor Rick Warren That is what MarriageFire.com is all about. Tuning in better to yourspouse’s needs and how you can meet them. If you consciously didthat everyday and your spouse did the same, your marriage will bestronger.

WishList

• Your WishList is broken down into several major categories:– My Favorites– Daily Wishes– Weekly Wishes– Monthly Wishes– Annual Goals– Life Goals

Get a greater understanding of each other – The ‘WishList’

Click on ‘My Scheduler’

WishList Builder Exercise

• Fill out your WishList Form.• If you have extra time, share with your spouse.• 10 – 15 minutes.

Implementation

• Fire up your lap tops and tablets• Enter your key data• Follow the packet• We’ll be here to support• Estimated session time 20-30 mins

Thank you!!!

• Feedback – will you help us improve?• Make sure to sign email list.• Email us at info@marriagefire.com• Spread the word – sign up marriages(s) closest

to you.• Like us on Facebook.• @MarriageFire

Have fun!

It’s your MarriageFire.

Stoke It!

Building Up of the American Family

• How to Counter the ‘FADE’?• Invest in the marriage.

– Bi-monthly date night reminders.– Doing exactly what you are doing right now (Church, seminars

together).– The Marriage Course, Love Languages, Sheet Music, Rebuilders,

MarriageFire.com.– Act on what is most important to your spouse.– Date night ideas/suggestions.– Daily ‘connection time ‘ reminders.– Counter lack of communication with email/text reminders.– Once set, reminders continue on far beyond the class and

continue for the life of the marriage.