Keeping Your Glass Half Full

Corrie Sirota M.S.W., P.S.W.Grief, Loss and Bereavement Specialist,

Author, TEDx speaker, radio co-host, momwww.corriesirota.com

http://www.corriesirota.com

Who am I?

PresenterPresentation NotesSO what does a grief counsellor know about positivity? Maybe nothing, maybe everything…

How is your day?

BAD DAYOR

GOOD DAY

STEP ONE

CREATE POSITIVE CHANGE

1ST CHANGE REALITY

Reality Architecture

1. Recognize Alternative Realities

2. Add Vantage Points

3. Now What?

= How to pursue the MOST valued reality

The Human Brain

INTERPRETS AND PROCESSES

INFORMATION

EXPENDS ENERGY CREATING AN

UNDERSTANDING OF INFORMATION

WE RECEIVE 11 MILLION PIECES BUT ONLY PROCESS 40

PIECES

THEREFOREOUR BRAIN

CHOOSES WHAT % TO PROCESS

IF WE FOCUS OUR ENERGY ON

POSITIVE THOUGHTS

= GREATER CHANCE OF HAPPINESS

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE?

IF OUR BELIEFS BECOME OUR REALITY, THEN…REALITY IS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING!

1. Recognize Alternative Realities:

OPTIMIST OR PESSIMIST?

A) RE-THINKING STRESS(-) NEGATIVE ASPECTS

LEADING CAUSE OF DEATH

90% OF DOCTOR VISITS ARE DUE TO STRESS RELATED ISSUES

STRESS NEGATIVELY EFFECTS MOST OF THE ORGANS IN THE BODY

(+) POSITIVE ASPECTS

HORMONES RELEASED IN THE STRESS BOOST PERFORMANCE

STRESS CAN FUEL PSYCHOLOGICAL THRIVING

STRESS FACILITATES:

MENTAL TOUGHNESS,

DEEPER SOCIAL BONDS,

STRENGTHENED PRIORITIES

SENSE OF MEANING

What’s your stress level?

In the past year, how much stress have you experienced?

1. Little stress?2. Moderate amount?3. A lot of stress?

What does the research say?

8 year study on stress the stress levels of people:

Results:

182,000 Americans died prematurely NOT from stress

They died from the BELIEF that stress is bad for you

This amounts to 20,000 deaths a year…

=15th largest COD

B) COFFEE CUP EXPERIEMENT

Activity #1:

DRAW A PICTURE OF A COFFEE MUG

PLEASE BE AS CREATIVE AS YOU POSSIBLY CAN BE!

1 in 10,000 draw this:

2) Add Vantage Points

A) Perspective in DetailsB) Perspective by Fuel

Sleep Nutrition Exercise & Mindfulness

C) Mastering switch between Realities

3) Pursue the MOST “Valuable Reality”

Activity #2 – Write down a task you dislike and then identify why you dislike it

HOWEVER for every ONE negative reason you must identify THREE positives. Training our brain to attach more positives to each situation:

Improves our brain flexibility

Significantly increases our ability to find and pursue our most valuable reality

PresenterPresentation NotesThe reality that is most valid, helpful and positive”

The Positivity Ratio

3:1 Losada Line (Marcel Losada, 2008)

Why not 1:1?

When it comes to relationships:

5:1 (John Gottman, The Gottman Institute)

PresenterPresentation Notes“Only when everyone keeps their eyes open to many realities both positive and negative in the right proportions can you choose to pursue the most beneficial one”(Achor, 2013)

BLIND SPOTS

1. INABILITY TO RELY ON OTHER PEOPLE

2. IMPACT AWARENESS

3. BOTTLING IT UP OR CONCEALING EMOTIONS

HOMEWORK: Create an ‘I DID IT’ list

1. Serve Others

2. Seek Learning

3. See Problems As Opportunities

4. Express Gratitude

5. Dream big

6. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

7. Speak Well of Others

8. Never make excuses

9. Get absorbed in the present

10. Wake up at the same time every morning

11. Avoid Social Comparisons

12. Choose Friends Wisely

13. Never seek Approval form Others

14. Take time to Listen

15. Nurture Social Relationships

16. Meditate or Pray

17. Eat Well

18. Exercise

19. Live Minimally

20. Tell the Truth

21. Accept what can’t be changed

22. Don’t Hold Grudges

23. Treat Everyone with Kindness

PresenterPresentation NotesTake list, print it out and try and tick off as many things as you are able to each day!

23 things that make you happy

Remember:Perception is perspective shaped by belief. Beliefs “control” perception. Rewrite your beliefs and rewrite your perception. Rewrite perception and you rewrite your genes and behavior…

Our Pledge:

“I am free to change how I respond to the world, so as I change the way I see the world, I change my genetic expression. I pledge to no longer see myself as a victim of my genes, instead, I choose to see myself as THE MASTER OF MY GENETICS.

~Bruce Lipton, PhD, cellular biologist

YOU DO YOU Robbins, Tony. (2016) How to pull yourself out

of that funk. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4cufCBUEb8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4cufCBUEb8

So how do you keep your Glass Half Full?

1. Recognize Alternative RealitiesBelieve

2. Add Vantage points

Cross train your brain

Fuel your reality

3. Now What? Pursue the MOST valuable reality

And remind yourself that the power to change your perspective is in YOUR CONTROL!

Proving once again that EVERYTHING is in your perspective:

Corrie’s contact info:EMAIL: corrie@corriesirota.com

WEBSITE: www.corriesirota.com

SOCIAL MEDIA:

TEDx Talk: ‘Loss & Found: How to Create New Normals After Someone You Love Dies’

https://youtu.be/PQ27tYEb74Y

mailto:corrie@corriesirota.comhttp://www.corriesirota.com/https://youtu.be/PQ27tYEb74Yhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/corriesirota/https://www.linkedin.com/in/corriesirota/https://www.instagram.com/corrie_sirota/https://www.instagram.com/corrie_sirota/https://www.facebook.com/corrie.sirota/https://www.facebook.com/corrie.sirota/https://twitter.com/corrie_sirotahttps://twitter.com/corrie_sirota

ReferencesAchor, Shawn (2013) Before Happiness. Crown Publishing

House, New York.

Achor, Shawn (2010) The Happiness Advantage. Random House, New York.

Harris, Russ. (2008) The Happiness Trap: How to stop struggling and start living. Boston, MA: Trumpeter.

Ogen, Pat Dr., Minton, Kekuni, Dr. (2000) Trauma and The Body, WW Norton.

McGonigal, Kelly. (2013) How to make stress your friend.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcGyVTAoXEU

Robbins, Tony. (2016) How to pull yourself out of that funk. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4cufCBUEb8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcGyVTAoXEUhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4cufCBUEb8

Corrie Sirota M.S.W., P.S.W.www.corriesirota.com

corrie@corriesirota.com

Keeping Your Glass �Half Full�Who am I? How is your day?STEP ONEReality ArchitectureThe Human BrainSlide Number 7Slide Number 8WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE?Slide Number 101. Recognize Alternative Realities:OPTIMIST OR PESSIMIST?A) RE-THINKING STRESSWhat’s your stress level?What does the research say?B) COFFEE CUP EXPERIEMENT1 in 10,000 draw this:2) Add Vantage PointsSlide Number 19Slide Number 20Slide Number 21Slide Number 223) Pursue the MOST “Valuable Reality”The Positivity RatioBLIND SPOTSHOMEWORK: Create an ‘I DID IT’ listRemember:YOU DO YOU�So how do you keep your �Glass Half Full?Proving once again that �EVERYTHING is in your perspective:Corrie’s contact info:References: ��Corrie Sirota M.S.W., P.S.W.�www.corriesirota.com�corrie@corriesirota.com��