I JUST REALIZEDTHIS IS SOME DARK SHIT

THAT USING POWER POINT MIGHT BE AN EFFECTIVE WAY TO WRITE PAPERS

I NORMALLY USE IT WHEN I TEACH. PERHAPS THERE IS A REASON FOR THAT – SOME CONNECTION. SOMEBODY DESIGNED THIS TO ENGAGE PEOPLE AND

THEY ENGAGED ME.

TELOS AND EQUALITYTHE IMPLICIT THEORY OF HISTORY HELD BY CRITICAL THEORISTS TODAY

A PARTICULAR TYPE OF BILDUNGI HOLD A DIFFERENT VIEW.

HOW TO EXPLAIN?

• CHARACTERISTICS:

• IT WOULD NOT BE ALTOGETHER WRONG TO SAY THAT IT SHARES MUCH WITH ROMANTIC VISIONS, BUT ALSO WITH ENLIGHTENMENT. I RETAINS AN INDIVIDUALISM – NOT ONE SO EASILY ALIGNED WITH CAPITALISM, BUT NOT ONE FULLY DEFINED IN OPPOSITION TO IT EITHER. IT IS ANTIMECHANICAL, ANTIURBAN, PRORURUAL, PAGANISH; A BIT DREAMY AND PHILOSOPHICAL, BUT REPELLED BY UNIVERSALS, ESSENCE, AND TALK OF OPPRESSION AND EMANCIPATION.

• CAPABLE AND GENEROUS, BUT WITH LITTLE GUILT.

• GROWTH IS VALUED, BUT THERE IS NO TELOS, AND DOUBLY NO TELOS OF EQUALITY. ALTHOUGH I AM AWARE THAT MOST IN MY FIELD FEEL OTHERWISE, I AM UNCONCERNED WITH OR BY INEQUALITY. IT JUST DOESN’T APPEAL TO ME, AND AS SAID, I AM EVEN REPULSED BY THE WAY THAT IT DOMINATES CONTEMPORARY THOUGHT.

GENEALOGY AS THE METHODOLOGY OF THE “STUDY” – OR BETTER, THE

INTERPRETATION. • THE QUESTION, THEN, IS WHAT DO I READ?

• AND STUDY AND DISCUSS?

• SOME OF IT IS ALREADY DONE

• BIESTA, GALLOWAY,

• TRANSFORMATIONAL AND CRITICAL THEORISTS WHO CONTINUE THE LEGACY OF A TELEOLOGY OF EQUALITY.

• SOME OF IT IS NOT DONE

• MORE NEEDS TO BE READ OF HUMBOLDT

• MORE NEEDS TO BE READ OF PETER WATSON

• OR RATHER I NEED TO REFER BACK TO MY NOTES FOR OTHER SOURCES. THAT IS, UNLESS HUMBOLDT IS ENOUGH

• THOUGH I SUSPECT I NEED MORE ON THE HISTORY OF OPPRESSION NARRATIVE AND HISTORICAL AND PHILOSOPHICAL TELOS OF EQUALITY

• THAT’S PRIMARILY MARX AND HEGEL AND I THINK I KNOW THEM WELL ENOUGH TO WRITE THIS PAPER – ALTHOUGH I WOULD WANT TO REVIEW MY NOTES

• THE METHOD OF WRITING WILL BE TO TELL A HISTORY BACKWARDS FROM TRANSFORMATIVE TEACHING TO BILDUNG AND THEN BACK FORWARD FROM A DIFFERENT TYPE OF BILDUNG TO A NEW (MY) APPROACH TO (SOCIAL STUDIES) EDUCATION.

• I HAVE A DIFFERENT VIEW, ONE THAT IS MORE APPEALING TO ME (AND PERHAPS TO OTHERS). BUT IF NOT, THAT IS OK. I AM MORE CONCERNED WITH

A YURT OR A LOG CABIN?

• A GARDEN AND SOME CHICKENS AND A BARN. THAT WOULD BE GOOD LIVING. THERE ARE CERTAINLY OTHER FORMS OF LIVING THAT I WOULD ENJOY, NONETHELESS. A HORSE EVENTUALLY. TREES, A POND, OPEN SPACES, ALTHOUGH THE GNATS AND MOSQUITOS ARE PRETTY ANNOYING. FRUIT TREES, FISHING, A WOOD-BURNING STOVE: A SIMPLE TIME. A TIME OF REFLECTION, A MORE PAGAN, OR EVEN MORE PRECISELY, A TEUTONIC TIME. BILDUNG; BILDINGSROMAN. A REFLECTIVE TIME, BUT ALSO A PHYSICALLY ACTIVE TIME; AS CLOSE TO THE EARTH AS YOU HAVE EVER BEEN. AND IF DADDY DEEDS ME THAT LAND, LIKE HE SAID HE WOULD, I AM PRETTY CONFIDENT THAT I CAN AFFORD IT, OR AT LEAST WOULD BE ABLE TO AFFORD IT SOON (EVEN AFTER STAYING AT MICKEYS HOUSE UNTIL I CAN SAVE UP THE MONEY – HE DID OFFER THAT). ALL OF THIS, LINKING TOGETHER, HAS IMPROVED MY RECKONING OF THIS POTENTIALITY.

BUT I NEED TO REMEMBER

• THAT I MIGHT BE GETTING RATHER DESPERATE FOR A JOB AND MIGHT BE IDEALIZING THIS SITUATION. I SUPPOSE THAT EVEN IF I DID, IT WOULD BE ALRIGHT. THE QUESTION OF SUCH THINGS, AS NIETZSCHE TAUGHT US, IS THE EXTENT TO WHICH THEY MAKE US HEALTHY AND HAVE THE SORT OF HAPPINESS THAT COMES WITH AN INCREASED HEALTH THAT ONE HAS TO SOME DEGREE EARNED BY HARD WORK AND SELF DISCIPLINE. FOCUSING ON THE POSITIVES AFTER ONE HAS DECIDED THAT THE POSITIVES OUTWEIGH THE NEGATIVES IS REASONABLE. IF OTHER JOBS COME UP DURING THIS TIME I WILL CONSIDER THEM AS WELL. HOWEVER, IF THIS IS ALL I HAVE IN THE BAG AND I LIKE THE PAY AND I LIKE THE FEEL, THEN I THINK I SHOULD GO – AND THE MORE I THINK ABOUT IT (TO THIS POINT) THE MORE POSITIVELY I FEEL ABOUT THIS VALUATION.

BILDUNG MORE GENERALLY

RECONSIDERING SPIRITUALITY

• I AM AN ATHEIST AND UNLESS THERE IS A GOOD REASON I DO NOT HIDE THAT. I DO NOT FEAR THE LABEL, BUT I RESPECT THAT FACT THAT I LIVE IN A WORLD DOMINATED BY BLIND INSTINCT. IT IS MY INSTINCT TO HOLD CONTRARY IDEAS AND TO SPEAK MY MIND WHEN THE OCCASION ARISES. I AM NO EVANGELICAL; I DO NOT SEEK TO LEAD THE FLOCK TO GREENER PASTURES; I AM MORE LIKELY TO PROTECT THEM FROM WOLVES, BUT THAT HAS MORE TO DO WITH MY RELATIONSHIP WITH THE WOLVES THAN THE SHEEP.

• BUT I DON’T THINK I AM EXCEPTIONALLY CLOSED-MINDED (MORE OPEN THAN MOST TO NEW IDEAS AND TO CHALLENGING MY OWN THINKING).

• I HAVE A DIFFERENT VIEW. I PREFER TO MAKE THE WORLD A “BETTER” PLACE ONE PERSON AT A TIME, STARTING WITH MYSELF.

• I THINK RECOGNIZING THAT ‘BETTER’ DEPENDS ENTIRELY UPON PERSPECTIVE MAKES ME FAR LESS LIKELY TO WANT TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE BECAUSE ONE RECOGNIZES THAT ALL THAT THE DESIRE TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE IS A DESIRE TO IMPOSE ONE’S OWN VISION OF THE GOOD LIFE UPON OTHERS – TO MAKE THEM BELIEVE THAT THERE ARE BUT ONE OR A FEW GOOD WAYS AND THAT MY OWN WAY IS THE RIGHT WAY (AND THOSE WHO THINK DIFFERENTLY ARE WRONG).

• IT SEEMS THAT SPIRITUALITY IS THE ABSENT OTHER. WE SEE THE MATERIAL, WE POSIT THE SPIRIT AS THAT WHICH IS NOT THERE. WE SEE DEATH, WE POSIT THE AFTERLIFE.

• SPIRITUALITY AS BILDUNG; BILDUNG AS PERSONAL GROWTH; GROWTH AS WITHOUT EXTERNAL VALUE. (PERHAPS THERE IS A POSITIVE EVALUATION TO BE GIVEN OF COSMIC GROWTH AND BECOMING, THE WORLD – WHAT?! DID YOU CATCH THE UNINTENTIONAL DOUBLE MEANING THERE? I ACKNOWLEDGE THAT IT WAS GOOD (FOR ME THAT EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED WAS GOOD FOR ME (AS ME). THERE ARE MANY THINGS THAT I DISLIKE AND FIND DISTASTEFUL, TRAGIC, OR UNFORTUNATE, BUT I RECOGNIZE THAT THEY WERE ALL GOOD FOR ME AS ME. I THINK FOR MOST PEOPLE THE FACT THAT THEIR OWN ANCESTORS WERE OPPRESSED OR WERE OPPRESSORS WAS GOOD FOR THEM AS THEM (I.E., THEY WOULD NOT BE HERE OTHERWISE) – IS MORE THAN THEY CAN BEAR. I AM SURE THAT I HAD ANCESTORS WHO WERE BOTH AND THAT DOES NOT BOTHER ME. IT SEEMS UNAVOIDABLE GIVEN THE EXPANSIVENESS OF NATURE AND THE INCONCEIVABLY LARGE NUMBER OF INFLUENCES UPON MY BIRTH AND CURRENT SITUATION.

AND OCCASIONALLY

• SWIMMING WITH THE DOLPHINS

• INTERNATIONAL CONFERENCES (EVEN IF I HAVE TO GET MY OWN FUNDING)

• HIKING THE MOUNTAINS

• CANOEING THE RIVER

AND ALSO

• A WOOD STOVE AND NO REGULAR ONE. A GRILL AND AN OUTDOOR FRYER AND BOILER.