I Hate PowerPoint

by MeetingBoywith @FlyoverJoel

“PowerPoint doesn't bore people; people bore people.”

And so outlawing PowerPoint won't change anything. But you can see why I would blame PowerPoint: I have many boring meetings and the one thing that's always the same isn't • the presenter• the topic• the room

It's PowerPoint. They all bore me with PowerPoint.

“Of course it wasn’t convincing. That 60-slide PowerPoint wasn’t to convince people, it was to break their will.”

A 2-hour meeting where the boss does all the talking from his prepared slides. How is that any different from how they brainwash new recruits into a cult?

“Don’t pity the blind man, for he has never seen PowerPoint.”

The blind man has never had to see: • All that ugly clip art.• The logo embedded on every page of an internal

presentation, as though we could ever forget where we work.• Unfortunate font choices.• 8 pt. type because the presenter crammed the slide with too

many words.

“When my grandchildren ask what happened to the trees, I won’t lie. I’ll say 'status reports and PowerPoint presentations'.”

Why, why, WHY did you insist on printing out 12 copies and handing them out, even though you put the presentation on the projector??!?!!

“125 PowerPoint slides? Well, I hope you’re not presenting a case for how efficient our department is.”

But the truth is the more you cram into a presentation, the more it seems like you can't ever come to a point, and that you can't tell the wheat from the chaff.

Managers got the idea that the more text you could put on a slide and the more total slides in the presentation, the better it was. That somehow it made you look smarter and more capable.

“The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t invent PowerPoint.”

Don't believe me? Then think about Heaven. Can you see St. Peter trying to impress God by discussing the latest soul harvest using PowerPoint? No way.

But in Hell everyone uses PowerPoint!

“It only takes 4 slides to explain how an atomic bomb works, so please stop calling your 72 slides 'an overview'.”

If all you're going to do is project the script you're reading from, then why don't you just let us read it to ourselves. It will be faster and we can do it from our desks.

“The creator of PowerPoint must be rolling over in his grave right about now. What? They’re not dead? I’ll be right back.”

The creator of PowerPoint probably thought they were helping. But by making presentations so easy to create, they lowered the bar so that any disorganized idiot can slap a few slides together and feel entitled to hold a meeting.

“China may have a great economy now, but let’s see how they do when they get PowerPoint.

This is our Trojan Horse. If we can get them to learn PowerPoint and give them a few buzzwords, then their economy will be brought to its knees in no time!

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This has been a MeetingBoy presentation.

Inspired by a post of MeetingBoy quotes by @FlyoverJoel. Read his rant here.

Additional graphics by @blobert