How to Punctuate DialogueHow to Punctuate Dialogue

The boys and I pulled our chairs near Papa as Big Ma asked, “How long you gonna be home, son?”

Papa looked across at her. “Till Sunday evening,” he said quietly.

“Sunday?” Mama exclaimed. “Why today’s already Saturday.

“I know, Baby,” Papa said, taking her hand, “but I gotta get a night train out of Vicksberg so I can get to work by Monday morning.”

1. Punctuate (comma) before you start speech marks

3. If you introduce a new speaker start a new line and indent.

2. Start the first word inside the speech marks with a capital letter (if it is a whole sentence of speech).

4. Punctuate (full stop or question mark) before you close speech marks.

Creating Mood and Atmosphere

The town woke, that long anticipated January morning under a thin grey blanket of rain. From the upper slopes of the hills to the north the enveloping drizzle came swirling down to fold the worn-out Victorian villas, the square brown boxes on the new estate and the long terraces of dark stone houses in a uniform drabness. The narrow streets, around the handful of small factories that provided the sole reason for the town’s existence, were murky chasms in the dim dawn. This was still several expectant hours in the future.

From: Cup Tie by Gerald SindtadtBack

Use Coherent Imagery From ‘From ‘The Doll’s House’

She was a tiny wishbone of a child, with cropped hair and enormous solemn eyes-a little white owl. She started forward. Kezia led the way. Like two little stray cats they followed across the courtyard to where the doll's house stood.

“Run away, children, run away at once. And don't come back again," said Aunt Beryl. And she stepped into the yard and shooed them out as if they were chickens.

But now that she had frightened those little rats of Kelveys and given Kezia a good scolding, her heart felt lighter.

Back

Use Sensory Words It was a wet-season day in the tropics. Swollen clouds swept from the south and squatted over my house. A massive clap of thunder shook the floors and gave the signal for the clouds to discharge their load. A gentle drumroll of rain on the roof built to a thrumming crescendo. The temperature instantly dropped by ten degrees. Through the window I could see water flooding off the roof, a curtain enveloping the house. The roar of rain drowned out all other noises.

No one deserved to be outside in that. The doorbell rang.

From “It’s Not All About You, Calma! by Barry Jonsberg Back

Use Interesting Adjectives and Verbs: The List!Warning! Thesaurus overuse can be lethal; it can kill your story. Don’t go

for words that are long and obscure (make you sound smart), go for the word that best describe that thing your character just did or that couch.

To See: contemplate, detect, discern, distinguish, examine, eye, gape, gawk, gaze, glare, glimpse, glom, identify, inspect, look, look at, make out, mind, note, notice, observe, peek, peep, peer, peg, penetrate, pierce, regard, remark, scan, scope, scrutinise, sight, spot, spy, stare, survey, take notice, view, watch, witness.

To Touch: brush, caress, contact, embrace, feel, fondle, graze, grope, handle, hit, hug, nudge, pat, peck, push, rub, rubbing, scratch, shock, stroke, tap.

To Sleep: crash, doze, dream, drop off, drowse, fall out, flag, flake out, flop, hibernate, kip, languish, nap, nod, nod off, pad out, relax, repose, rest, retire, roll in, slumber, snooze, snore, yawn, zzz.

Big: ample, awash, brimming, bulky, colossal, considerable, copious, crowded, enormous, extensive, fat, full, gigantic, hefty, huge, hulking, humungous, husky, immense, jumbo, mammoth, massive, oversize, packed, ponderous, prodigious, roomy, sizable, spacious, strapping, stuffed, substantial, super colossal*, thundering, vast, voluminous

Little: bantam, brief, cramped, diminutive, dinky, dwarf, elfin, embryonic, fleeting, hasty, immature, imperceptible, inappreciable, inconsiderable, infant, infinitesimal, insufficient, junior, light, limited, meager, microscopic, mini, miniature, minute, not big, not large, peanut*, petite, pygmy, scant, short, short-lived, shrimp, shriveled, skimpy, slight, snub, sparse, stubby, stunted, teeny, tiny, toy, truncated, undersized, undeveloped, wee, wizened, young

Sad: bereaved, bitter, blue*, cheerless, dejected, depressed, despairing, despondent, disconsolate, dismal, distressed, doleful, down, downcast, forlorn, gloomy, glum, grief-stricken, grieved, heartbroken, heartsick, heavy-hearted, hurting, in doldrums*, in grief, languishing, low, low-spirited, lugubrious, melancholy, morbid, morose, mournful, pensive, pessimistic, somber, sorrowful, sorry, troubled, weeping, wistful, woebegone

Back

Totally Banned: Over-Writing and Clichés!

Over-writing and clichés will kill your personal voice and the effectiveness of your writing. The overuse or the use of adjectives, similes, metaphors and clichés is bad. Here

are some examples: She contemplated him from across the table. He was a big man, the cowboy, his muscles pulled at his worn, plaid shirt. His sleeves were rolled up, revealing tight, beautiful bronzed forearms. He had thick hair as thick as a horse’s mane, a square chin, a nose as straight as a riding crop, and expressive cobalt eyes that turned sensual and made her catch her breath.

From Thunderbolt Over Texas by Barbara Dunlop

Light and shadow from her empty hall flickered over her closed eyelids and the dream pulled her down, overmastering her senses, making them catch fire. He called to her, her dark warrior in his shimmering armour. His eyes were a creamy chocolate brown and his broad chest was graced with golden curls glistened in the candle light. His presence and his vitality overwhelmed her like a strong scent. Their shadowy bond was fierce, intensified by the danger...

From Untamed by Helen Kirkman

Back