How to Disagree with and How to Disagree with and Correct A BrotherCorrect A Brother

Introduction:Introduction:

• Disagreements are certain to arise between Disagreements are certain to arise between brethren.brethren.

• We’re dealing with people (and their We’re dealing with people (and their personalities) and this always provides the personalities) and this always provides the potential for disagreements and disputes.potential for disagreements and disputes.

• The question of this lesson is how will we The question of this lesson is how will we disagree and correct brethren?disagree and correct brethren?

• Galatians 6:1 KJV 1 Brethren, if a man be Galatians 6:1 KJV 1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.tempted.

• James 5:19-20 KJV 19 Brethren, if any of James 5:19-20 KJV 19 Brethren, if any of you do err from the truth, and one convert you do err from the truth, and one convert him; 20 Let him know, that he which him; 20 Let him know, that he which converteth the sinner from the error of his converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a multitude of sins.hide a multitude of sins.

• To stand up for what you believe takes To stand up for what you believe takes courage and involves riskscourage and involves risks..

• There are many loving and compassionate There are many loving and compassionate people who do not like confrontation - but people who do not like confrontation - but they are willing to take the risk of being they are willing to take the risk of being called names... of being falsely accused of called names... of being falsely accused of being intolerant, or being labeled as being intolerant, or being labeled as judgmental.judgmental.

First We Need To Know That We First We Need To Know That We Are Not The First Ones To Are Not The First Ones To

Experience ThisExperience This..• We have said, there have always been We have said, there have always been

disagreements among brethren in the Lord.disagreements among brethren in the Lord.

• Some of the disagreements have been minor Some of the disagreements have been minor and, for the most part, insignificant. Other and, for the most part, insignificant. Other disagreements have been major and very disagreements have been major and very significant; in fact, some have been big ones.significant; in fact, some have been big ones.

• Jesus taught us how to handle these disagreements Jesus taught us how to handle these disagreements between brethren.between brethren.

• Matthew 18:15-17 KJV 15 Moreover if thy brother Matthew 18:15-17 KJV 15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16 But if he will not thou hast gained thy brother. 16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17 And if he shall neglect to may be established. 17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.heathen man and a publican.

• Paul had a personal conflict with his Paul had a personal conflict with his working companion, Barnabas.working companion, Barnabas.

• Acts 15:36-41 KJV 36 And some days after Paul Acts 15:36-41 KJV 36 And some days after Paul said unto Barnabas, Let us go again and visit our said unto Barnabas, Let us go again and visit our brethren in every city where we have preached brethren in every city where we have preached the word of the Lord, and see how they do. 37 the word of the Lord, and see how they do. 37 And Barnabas determined to take with them And Barnabas determined to take with them John, whose surname was Mark. 38 But Paul John, whose surname was Mark. 38 But Paul thought not good to take him with them, who thought not good to take him with them, who departed from them from Pamphylia, and went departed from them from Pamphylia, and went not with them to the work. not with them to the work.

• 39 And the contention was so sharp between 39 And the contention was so sharp between them, that they departed asunder one from them, that they departed asunder one from the other: and so Barnabas took Mark, and the other: and so Barnabas took Mark, and sailed unto Cyprus; 40 And Paul chose Silas, sailed unto Cyprus; 40 And Paul chose Silas, and departed, being recommended by the and departed, being recommended by the brethren unto the grace of God. 41 And he brethren unto the grace of God. 41 And he went through Syria and Cilicia, confirming went through Syria and Cilicia, confirming the churches.the churches.

• D.D. Paul had a conflict with PeterPaul had a conflict with Peter

• Galatians 2:11-13 KJV 11 But when Peter was Galatians 2:11-13 KJV 11 But when Peter was come to Antioch, I withstood him to the face, come to Antioch, I withstood him to the face, because he was to be blamed. 12 For before that because he was to be blamed. 12 For before that certain came from James, he did eat with the certain came from James, he did eat with the Gentiles: but when they were come, he withdrew Gentiles: but when they were come, he withdrew and separated himself, fearing them which were of and separated himself, fearing them which were of the circumcision. 13 And the other Jews dissembled the circumcision. 13 And the other Jews dissembled likewise with him; insomuch that Barnabas also likewise with him; insomuch that Barnabas also was carried away with their dissimulation.was carried away with their dissimulation.

Suggestions To Follow In Suggestions To Follow In Resolving The Disagreements Resolving The Disagreements

That Come Up.That Come Up.

• Be firmly committed to maintaining peace.Be firmly committed to maintaining peace.

• Ephesians 4:3 KJV 3 Endeavouring to keep Ephesians 4:3 KJV 3 Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

• Romans 12:18 KJV 18 If it be possible, as Romans 12:18 KJV 18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.men.

• Genesis 13:8-9 KJV 8 And Abram said unto Genesis 13:8-9 KJV 8 And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we be herdmen and thy herdmen; for we be brethren. 9 Is not the whole land before brethren. 9 Is not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me: thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me: if thou wilt take the left hand, then I will go if thou wilt take the left hand, then I will go to the right; or if thou depart to the right to the right; or if thou depart to the right hand, then I will go to the left.hand, then I will go to the left.

• Study the disagreement carefully!Study the disagreement carefully!

• Proverbs 18:13 KJV 13 He that answereth a Proverbs 18:13 KJV 13 He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.shame unto him.

• Don’t become a false acuser!Don’t become a false acuser!

• Proverbs 6:19 KJV 19 A false witness that Proverbs 6:19 KJV 19 A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.among brethren.

• Pray for them and for yourself.Pray for them and for yourself.

• Colossians 1:9 KJV 9 For this cause we also, Colossians 1:9 KJV 9 For this cause we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to desire that ye might be pray for you, and to desire that ye might be filled with the knowledge of his will in all filled with the knowledge of his will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding;wisdom and spiritual understanding;

• Maybe, we are talking about elders.Maybe, we are talking about elders.

• You do not find “good ol’ boy” listed as a You do not find “good ol’ boy” listed as a qualification for elders in the New qualification for elders in the New Testament, yet some men are chosen to be Testament, yet some men are chosen to be elders based on popularity. Choose men to elders based on popularity. Choose men to serve as bishops based on man-made serve as bishops based on man-made qualifications and you have a man-made qualifications and you have a man-made eldership. eldership.

• Take time to sit down with the one(s) Take time to sit down with the one(s) involved in the situation and talk it over.involved in the situation and talk it over.

• Matthew 5:23-24 KJV 23 Therefore if thou Matthew 5:23-24 KJV 23 Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; 24 Leave there thy gift before against thee; 24 Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.gift.

• Matthew 18:15 KJV 15 Moreover if thy Matthew 18:15 KJV 15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.thy brother.

• Consider the other individual(s) as honest souls Consider the other individual(s) as honest souls who are trying to do what is right.who are trying to do what is right.

• 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 KJV 4 Charity suffereth long, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 KJV 4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 5 Doth not behave itself not itself, is not puffed up, 5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; 6 Rejoiceth not in provoked, thinketh no evil; 6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 7 Beareth all iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.endureth all things.

• I cannot stress enough that “Love” for the I cannot stress enough that “Love” for the individual not the sin comes first.individual not the sin comes first.

• Realize that no one has all the best answers.Realize that no one has all the best answers.

• 1 Peter 5:5-6 KJV 5 Likewise, ye younger, 1 Peter 5:5-6 KJV 5 Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble. 6 Humble and giveth grace to the humble. 6 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:of God, that he may exalt you in due time:

• James 3:17 KJV 17 But the wisdom that is James 3:17 KJV 17 But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy.without hypocrisy.

• Nothing wrong with seeking the input of Nothing wrong with seeking the input of other faithful Christians.other faithful Christians.

• Sometimes others, who are not so “close to a Sometimes others, who are not so “close to a situation can offer a objective opinion that situation can offer a objective opinion that will be most helpful.will be most helpful.

• Proverbs 11:14 KJV 14 Where no counsel is, Proverbs 11:14 KJV 14 Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety.counsellors there is safety.

• Proverbs 12:15 KJV 15 The way of a fool is Proverbs 12:15 KJV 15 The way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that hearkeneth right in his own eyes: but he that hearkeneth unto counsel is wise.unto counsel is wise.

• Resist the temptation to become bitter or Resist the temptation to become bitter or resentful.resentful.

• James 5:9 KJV 9 Grudge not one against James 5:9 KJV 9 Grudge not one against another, brethren, lest ye be condemned: another, brethren, lest ye be condemned: behold, the judge standeth before the door.behold, the judge standeth before the door.

• Ephesians 4:31-32 KJV 31 Let all bitterness, Ephesians 4:31-32 KJV 31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32 And be ye kind one to another, malice: 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.

Remember, Proper Respect Remember, Proper Respect For All MenFor All Men

• Matthew 18:10-14 KJV 10 Take heed that ye Matthew 18:10-14 KJV 10 Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones; for I say unto despise not one of these little ones; for I say unto you, That in heaven their angels do always behold you, That in heaven their angels do always behold the face of my Father which is in heaven. 11 For the the face of my Father which is in heaven. 11 For the Son of man is come to save that which was lost. 12 Son of man is come to save that which was lost. 12 How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray? and seeketh that which is gone astray?

• 13 And if so be that he find it, verily I say 13 And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. 14 Even so it is not the will of your astray. 14 Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should perish.little ones should perish.

• Galatians 2:20 KJV 20 I am crucified with Galatians 2:20 KJV 20 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.me.

• 2 Corinthians 5:10 KJV 10 For we must all 2 Corinthians 5:10 KJV 10 For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad.whether it be good or bad.

CONCLUSIONCONCLUSION::

• Disagreements are certain to arise.Disagreements are certain to arise.

• Be readyBe ready to “fight the good fight of faith,” to to “fight the good fight of faith,” to “lay hold on eternal life,” (I Timothy 6:12).“lay hold on eternal life,” (I Timothy 6:12).

• We mustWe must “mark them which cause divisions “mark them which cause divisions and offenses contrary to the doctrine…and and offenses contrary to the doctrine…and avoid them,” (Romans 16:17).avoid them,” (Romans 16:17).

• Again, how we deal with them will show how Again, how we deal with them will show how committed we are to the Lord and to the committed we are to the Lord and to the progress of His kingdom.progress of His kingdom.

• It is always sad and difficult for everyone It is always sad and difficult for everyone when brethren have conflicts and it is a great when brethren have conflicts and it is a great hindrance to the Lord’s work.hindrance to the Lord’s work.

• Be ready to change when we discover that Be ready to change when we discover that we are wrong!we are wrong!

• Whenever disagreements arise between Whenever disagreements arise between brethren, we can bring joy back to the brethren, we can bring joy back to the congregation by respecting these principles congregation by respecting these principles taught in God’s word.taught in God’s word.

What Must I Do?What Must I Do?

•• I must turn away from my I must turn away from my error error -- (REPENT)(REPENT)

•• I MUST obey whatever God I MUST obey whatever God requires of me! requires of me!

••Believe Believe

••RepentRepent

••Confess ChristConfess Christ

••Be baptized into Be baptized into ChristChrist