Goal-Setting Goal-Setting StrategiesStrategies

to Help Studentsto Help StudentsAccomplish Personal and Accomplish Personal and

Educational GoalsEducational Goals

Today you will proceed Today you will proceed step-by-step through each step-by-step through each strategy and set a goal.strategy and set a goal.

• So think about it So think about it What goal do What goal do you want to achieve?you want to achieve?

• Today Today select a goal that select a goal that you wantyou want to accomplish. Something you can to accomplish. Something you can do every day or every other day.do every day or every other day.

GOAL-SETTING IDEAS GOAL-SETTING IDEAS

1.1. Quit a bad habitQuit a bad habit2.2. Begin/maintain fitness programBegin/maintain fitness program3.3. Eat a healthful dietEat a healthful diet4.4. Drink adequate waterDrink adequate water5.5. Drink less popDrink less pop6.6. Reduce/quit caffeineReduce/quit caffeine7.7. Quit smokingQuit smoking8.8. Lose weightLose weight9.9. Recreate and/or relaxRecreate and/or relax10.10.Make time for ______Make time for ______

More ideas . . . More ideas . . .

• 11.11. Learn a new sport/hobbyLearn a new sport/hobby

• 12.12. Get up 15 min. earlierGet up 15 min. earlier

• 13.13. Get more/less sleepGet more/less sleep

• 14.14. StudyStudy

• 15.15. Do something nice for someone each Do something nice for someone each dayday

• 17.17. ReadRead

• 18.18. Plan mini vacationsPlan mini vacations

• 19.19. Manage your time betterManage your time better

• 20.20. Leave work earlierLeave work earlier

Eight Principles to Help You Eight Principles to Help You Help StudentsHelp Students

(and Yourself) to Set (and Yourself) to Set

and Accomplish Goalsand Accomplish Goals

adapted from: adapted from:

Reality Therapy Reality Therapy

by Dr. William Glasserby Dr. William Glasser

OUTCOMESOUTCOMES STUDENTS STUDENTS WILL GAIN:WILL GAIN:

1.1. Life tools for goal settingLife tools for goal setting

2.2. More control of their lifeMore control of their life

3.3. A set of principles to help them A set of principles to help them succeed succeed at accomplishing goalsat accomplishing goals

4.4. A boost in self-esteem and self-respectA boost in self-esteem and self-respect

THE EIGHT PRINCIPLESTHE EIGHT PRINCIPLES

1.1. Develop a warm and friendly relationship. Develop a warm and friendly relationship. Display your genuine interest and concern.Display your genuine interest and concern.

a.a. How How listen and discoverlisten and discover ReflectReflect share andshare and care care

b.b. Positive relationships motivate people to Positive relationships motivate people to change their behavior.change their behavior.

2.2. Focus on present and future Focus on present and future plans—not on WHY past plans—not on WHY past plans failed.plans failed.

a.a. You can’t change your past but You can’t change your past but you you can plan changes for your futurecan plan changes for your future..

b.b. It is important to assess the past to It is important to assess the past to learn from it but learn from it but not to dwell on itnot to dwell on it..

c.c. Put energy into planningPut energy into planning..

d.d. Ask “Ask “WHATWHAT” questions. ” questions.

““WHAT” questions encourage you to think WHAT” questions encourage you to think about about what you want to accomplish and what you want to accomplish and howhow..

FOR EXAMPLEFOR EXAMPLE::

““WhatWhat kind of plan would you like to kind of plan would you like to make?” make?”

““WhatWhat do you want to accomplish?” do you want to accomplish?”

““WhatWhat will make your plan work?” will make your plan work?”

3.3. Develop a plan of action Develop a plan of action using the following using the following guidelines:guidelines:

a.a. Be informed—learn about and Be informed—learn about and evaluate different approaches to evaluate different approaches to obtain your goal:obtain your goal:

Ask others how they achieved their Ask others how they achieved their goals.goals.

Explore educational materials.Explore educational materials.

a.a. Be specificBe specific about what you about what you want to accomplish want to accomplish being being specific gives you a specific gives you a targettarget to aim for. to aim for.

What, when, where (or where not), & What, when, where (or where not), & how long.how long.

If possible, make goals measurable.If possible, make goals measurable.

Consider building in flextime.Consider building in flextime.

c.c. Develop smaller steps to Develop smaller steps to accomplish your goal. accomplish your goal.

Small steps promote small Small steps promote small successes toward your successes toward your goal.goal.

d.d. Recruit others to support Recruit others to support you. you. Who can you rely on to check on you and Who can you rely on to check on you and

encourage you?encourage you?

Select someone who Select someone who won’t give upwon’t give up on you, on you, daresdares to intervene, but is not an annoying to intervene, but is not an annoying nag.nag.

Tell supporters what you’re trying to do, Tell supporters what you’re trying to do, what they shouldn’t do, and how they can what they shouldn’t do, and how they can help you.help you.

f.f. When you develop specific When you develop specific plans, you are preparing to plans, you are preparing to take action.take action.

e.e.Consider rewarding yourself. Consider rewarding yourself. Rewards can be especially Rewards can be especially important when you’re important when you’re depriving yourself of a depriving yourself of a cherished habit.cherished habit.

SAMPLE PLANSAMPLE PLAN

WHATWHAT:: walk for weight losswalk for weight lossShort-termShort-term – walk 25 mins, 5 days/wk – walk 25 mins, 5 days/wk Long-termLong-term – walk 45 mins, 5 days/wk – walk 45 mins, 5 days/wkWHEREWHERE: in my neighborhood: in my neighborhoodWHENWHEN:: 4 PM or 9 PM 4 PM or 9 PM HOW LONGHOW LONG:: Start at 25 min. Progress Start at 25 min. Progress

by adding 5 min. to each week.by adding 5 min. to each week.SUPPORTSUPPORT: Janet Doe : Janet Doe REWARDREWARD: :

4.4. Get a commitment. Get a commitment. Commitment promotes Commitment promotes accountability.accountability.

a.a.Hear your partner say “I will . . Hear your partner say “I will . . .” .”

Pay attention to body Pay attention to body language to check sincerity.language to check sincerity.

b.b. Ask “WHAT IF” questions Ask “WHAT IF” questions to:to:

examine and prepare for possible examine and prepare for possible obstacles. obstacles.

to check commitmentto check commitment

• “ “What if ______, will you still do What if ______, will you still do it?”it?”

•““What would keep you from doing What would keep you from doing it?”it?”

•““If something interrupts your plan, If something interrupts your plan, will youwill you reschedule it?” reschedule it?”

Make a written Make a written commitment. commitment.

Go public.Go public.

Chart your progress.Chart your progress.

5.5. Check on the person’s Check on the person’s progress on a regular basis.progress on a regular basis.

a.a. Ask how her/his plan is Ask how her/his plan is progressing.progressing.

b.b. Help her/him make Help her/him make modifications if necessary.modifications if necessary.

NoteNote: Some plans fail because : Some plans fail because they are inappropriate.they are inappropriate.

c.c. Use Use WHATWHAT questions to questions to encourage individuals to encourage individuals to evaluate their plan and evaluate their plan and progress.progress.

““Is Is WHATWHAT you are doing working out?” you are doing working out?”

““WHATWHAT would make your plan work would make your plan work better?”better?”

““WHATWHAT times are better for you?” times are better for you?”

6.6. Help people if they don’t Help people if they don’t follow their plans.follow their plans.

a.a. ALWAYS FORGIVE! ALWAYS FORGIVE!

Forgiveness allows people to Forgiveness allows people to continue and refocus on their continue and refocus on their plan.plan.

Learn from your slips and Learn from your slips and redouble your efforts.redouble your efforts.

b.b. DON’T ASK “WHY” they DON’T ASK “WHY” they failed. Asking “WHY” is failed. Asking “WHY” is asking for excuses!asking for excuses!

Ask “WHAT can you do next time to accomplish your plan?

7.7. Create new and positive Create new and positive self-self-talk that directs & encouragestalk that directs & encourages you to reach your goals.you to reach your goals.

a.a. Become aware of self-talk messages Become aware of self-talk messages that:that:

keep you from achieving your goals. keep you from achieving your goals.

(“I’m too tired.”)(“I’m too tired.”)

precede a bad habit. (“One more precede a bad habit. (“One more piece.”)piece.”)

NoteNote: Self-talk is your inner : Self-talk is your inner conversation (ideas and conversation (ideas and thoughts)thoughts)largely subconscious largely subconscious

lightening fastlightening fast

barely on the edge of awarenessbarely on the edge of awareness

often deceptiveoften deceptive

b.b. Ask yourself: “What might I Ask yourself: “What might I tell myself that will keep me tell myself that will keep me from reaching my goal?” from reaching my goal?”

• Make a list of those statements Make a list of those statements (self-talk).(self-talk).

• Once you become more aware of Once you become more aware of your self-talk and its affect on your self-talk and its affect on you, you can begin to question you, you can begin to question your self-talk.your self-talk.

ExamplesExamples::

Self TalkSelf Talk“I “I have tohave to have 12 hours of have 12 hours of sleep.”sleep.”

Question Question “Do I have to have 12 “Do I have to have 12 hours?”hours?”

Self Talk Self Talk “I “I hatehate vegetables.” vegetables.”

Question Question “Do I really hate them?”“Do I really hate them?”

Questioning your self-talk allows Questioning your self-talk allows you to become aware of your you to become aware of your

self-deception.self-deception. Once aware, you can replace old Once aware, you can replace old

negative self-talk with new negative self-talk with new empowering self-talk.empowering self-talk.

Write down the new positive self-talk Write down the new positive self-talk messages.messages.

Post the new messages where they Post the new messages where they can remind you.can remind you.

Examples of self-talk Examples of self-talk replacementreplacement

•OLDOLD:: “I hate math!”“I hate math!”

•NEWNEW:: “I’ll beat math “I’ll beat math before it beats me!”before it beats me!”

another example . . .another example . . .

•OLDOLD: “I have to have my : “I have to have my morning caffeine!”morning caffeine!”

•NEWNEW:: “After a while I won’t “After a while I won’t miss my caffeine.”miss my caffeine.”

another . . .another . . .

•OLDOLD: : “There’s no point in my “There’s no point in my quitting smoking—all my friends quitting smoking—all my friends smoke.”smoke.”

•NEWNEW:: “It will be challenging to “It will be challenging to quit but I bet others, secretly, quit but I bet others, secretly, wish they could too.”wish they could too.”

e.e. Tell yourself what your new Tell yourself what your new self will be like. self will be like.

f.f. Positive directives like these will Positive directives like these will counteract previous brainwashing counteract previous brainwashing messages of self-doubt, inability, or messages of self-doubt, inability, or dislike. dislike.

Simple awareness of your “mental Simple awareness of your “mental tricks” (self-talk) helps you to gain tricks” (self-talk) helps you to gain a measure of control over them.a measure of control over them.

When we mislead ourselves, we When we mislead ourselves, we impede our progress.impede our progress.

8.8. DON’T GIVE UP ON YOURSELF DON’T GIVE UP ON YOURSELF OR OTHERS YOU ARE OR OTHERS YOU ARE COMMITTED TO HELPINGCOMMITTED TO HELPING

INSTEAD INSTEAD

obtain another commitment to their obtain another commitment to their plan.plan.

help partners find ways to modify the help partners find ways to modify the old plan.old plan.

develop a new plan.develop a new plan.

“Everything can be taken from man

but one thing:the last of the human freedoms

– to choose one’s attitudein any given set of

circumstances,to choose one’s own way.”

MAN’S SEARCH FOR MEANING

-Viktor Frankl-

More Tidbits On: Changing More Tidbits On: Changing Habits Habits

1.1. Established habits are integral parts Established habits are integral parts of our lives—they are our friends—of our lives—they are our friends—even in many cases our lovers.even in many cases our lovers.

2.2. To overcome problem behaviors fully, To overcome problem behaviors fully, we must replace them with a new we must replace them with a new healthier life style.healthier life style.

3.3. Old patterns die hard.Old patterns die hard.4.4. Intentional self-change cannot happen Intentional self-change cannot happen

unless we give it a prominent place in unless we give it a prominent place in our lives—at the top of the list.our lives—at the top of the list.

more . . . more . . .

5.5. Distress and stress are the most common Distress and stress are the most common causes of relapse—self-talk is important here.causes of relapse—self-talk is important here.

6.6. Be aware of the forces against change. For Be aware of the forces against change. For example example The U.S. government spends $50 The U.S. government spends $50 million a year trying to help people stop million a year trying to help people stop smoking. The tobacco industry spends 10 smoking. The tobacco industry spends 10 times that amount to win new smokers and times that amount to win new smokers and retain old ones.retain old ones.

7.7. Real changes take real work.Real changes take real work.

More . . .More . . .

8.8. It’s rare to overcome a problem on your first It’s rare to overcome a problem on your first attempt. Clinical research indicates that only attempt. Clinical research indicates that only 20% of the population permanently conquer 20% of the population permanently conquer long-standing problems on the first try.long-standing problems on the first try.

9.9. Beware of “catastrophizing.” For example, if Beware of “catastrophizing.” For example, if you’re dieting, sneak a few chocolate chips, you’re dieting, sneak a few chocolate chips, and then say, “I failed. It’s hopeless. I’ll and then say, “I failed. It’s hopeless. I’ll never be able to lose weight. I might as well never be able to lose weight. I might as well pig out now!” pig out now!”

More . . .More . . .

10.10. A good helping relationship provides A good helping relationship provides you with a supportive atmosphere within you with a supportive atmosphere within which you can process, plan, and see which you can process, plan, and see yourself.yourself.

11.11.Keep checking on people who have Keep checking on people who have solicited your help in setting goals or solicited your help in setting goals or changing behaviors because relapse is changing behaviors because relapse is more common than not.more common than not.

another quote from Viktor another quote from Viktor Frankl . . Frankl . .

• ““Any attempt at fighting the camp’s Any attempt at fighting the camp’s [Nazi concentration camp] [Nazi concentration camp] psychopathological influence on the psychopathological influence on the prisoner had to aim at giving him prisoner had to aim at giving him strength by pointing out to him a future strength by pointing out to him a future goalgoal to which he could look forward. to which he could look forward. Instinctively some of the prisoners Instinctively some of the prisoners attempted to find one on their own. It attempted to find one on their own. It is a peculiarity of man that he can only is a peculiarity of man that he can only live by looking to the future."live by looking to the future."