franc mag— issue 2 web site: page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · we need pupils to write...

24
Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 1

Upload: others

Post on 16-Aug-2020

4 views

Category:

Documents


0 download

TRANSCRIPT

Page 1: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 1

Page 2: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 2

Content Page Contents ………………………….…...………………………………………………………….…...2 Teacher Oscar review………….………………………………..………………...…………3 Fantasy Football tips….………………………………………….………………...…………4 Junk mail corner……………………………………………………………………….…………..5 Love advice .……………………………………………………………………………….………….5 The health advice column…………………………………………………….….…….…..6 Where are they now?.............................................................................7 Star profile: Thierry Henry…………………………………………………..………….8 Star profile: Amir Khan……….………………………………………….………………..9 Kung Fu guy (Competition)………………………………………………………….10/11 The gizmo gadget guide………………………………………………………………12/13 How can I help save the environment?.............................................14 Carnival Club……..……………………………………………………………………….…………15 Nick’s funny stories and jokes.…..……………………….…………………….16/17 Say ‘No’ to bullying!..........................................................................18/19 The School Council…………………………………….………………………………..20/21 The Lanfranc music awards……………………………………………………………..22 Competitions, Jokes and Prizes……………………………....……………….22/23

Welcome to your magazine! The Franc Mag! is written by pupils for pupils! This is the second issue of Franc Mag and we hope you like it! Remember it’s your magazine and website so if you think it can be improved, help us! We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or Miss Giles or attend the magazine meetings on Tuesdays at 2.30pm or email us your articles to [email protected]. Many thanks from the Franc Mag Team!

Page 3: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 3

We wanted to see some of the reactions from last term’s teacher Oscar winners. So we asked our own winning teachers a few choice questions! Ms Osborne (Strictest Teacher winner) Question: If you had a choice of what Oscar you could win what would it be and why? Answer: The nicest teacher because I can be nice sometimes (Honest!) Question: Are there any new students scared of you after you won this Oscar? Answer: No I don’t think so, I fear no one! Mr Bakare (Funniest Teacher winner) Question: What Oscar do you want to win next year? Answer: The same one I won last year, it’s the best Oscar to win of course! Question: As the funniest teacher you have to tell us a joke? Answer: “Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains” doctor says, “ Well pull yourself together man” Mr Pumphrey (Most accident prone teacher winner and most talkative teacher winner) Question: How do you feel about winning 2 awards and coming runner up 3 times? Answer: I feel proud, especially beating Mr Tormey ‘he he!’ Question: Would you like to challenge Ms Mann for her title? Answer: Yes I would, next year If I up my game I may even try to go for the a hat-trick I think! Ms Mann (Best overall Teacher winner) Question: What will you do to keep your Oscar? Answer: Keep doing what I am doing right and don’t do what I’m doing wrong! Question: Is there any competition you are worried about? Answer: Yes, Mr Westmacott. Ms Giles (Best dressed Teacher winner) Question: How much money will you spend on a new wardrobe to retain your Oscar? Answer: I would love to spend lots as shopping is one of my favourite hobbies but I can’t afford much! There is a lot of pressure to maintain my title this year there is some tough competition around. Question: Is there any one that you think will take your title? Answer: There are many well-dressed teachers here but I thick Ms Bostock has the best chance. Mr Tormey (Loudest Teacher winner) Question: Can you give us some tips on how you have not lost your voice? Answer: Voice control and voice projection techniques. Question: Would you like to go for another Oscar? Answer: Yes the strictest teacher of course. Mr Westmacott (Nicest Teacher winner) Question: Do you think that winning the nicest teacher award has made you a better teacher? Answer: Yes, but I always was a good teacher before I received the award! Question: Do you think you are a role model for the pupils in this school? Answer: Absolutely! By Jermaine Bacon

Page 4: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 4

Fantasy football tips! Calling all school fantasy football players! It’s time to create your own fantasy team, the deadline is close. Who will you pick I hear you say? Well look no further and read up on some of the top tips from ‘Franc Mag’ to race you up that fantasy league! We are helping you to find the best new players around so here are my top tips:- Gareth Bale - He wanted to join Manchester United but settled for Tottenham Hotspur and, to the fantasy manager, this should make Bale a more attractive proposition. Quite possibly the attacking left back signed from Southampton could be the most profitable in his position outside of those playing for the Big Four. Steven Reid - Wait, don’t laugh. Yes, Steven Reid, the water carrier with the weakened knee, the converted defender is at the centre of one of the Premiership’s most workmanlike midfields and the player who makes Robbie Savage looks creative. Yes, Reid could strengthen your fantasy squad with his gritty edge. Eduardo da Silva - The speed with which Arsene Wenger acted spoke volumes. A fortnight after Thierry Henry had bid au revoir to Arsenal, their manager, usually among the most cautious in the transfer market, had reportedly spent almost eight million on him. Martin Petrov - In Bulgaria he is more revered than Dimitar Berbatov and won the 2006 Bulgarian footballer of the year just as his countryman at Spurs had begun to pull apart the best Premiership defences. Fernando Torres - is a Spanish footballer who joined Liverpool from AthleticoMadrid for £26.5 million fee. During his time in Spain, Torres scored 55 goals over 5 seasons. He is known as 'El Nino'(The Kid). This 'baby-faced' assassin has a huge weight of expectation on his shoulders, but has already proved that he can get goals in the Premiership by opening his account against Chelsea. He currently keeps Peter Crouch out of Liverpool's starting eleven.

So take our advice and enter some of the new blood into your team, who knows

it might get you some valuable points! Good luck with your fantasy team!

By Narthejan Amuthalingam

Page 5: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 5

Problem: There is a boy at my school who I really like but the problem is that he is a bit of a nerd! He has asked me out and I have not yet answered. I wanted to say yes but I think my friends will hate me forever and call me names! I am quite popular at school so my reputation is on the line here! What should I do? Advice: I think you should ignore your friends and do what your heart says. If your heart chooses him, and you lose some friends then I would not worry too much as these friends sound very shallow. However you could try changing the boy’s style and look to something a bit “cooler”! Then that way you get your love and keep your popu-larity! However don’t push him too much or he will think you can’t accept him the way he is!

Problem: I’m 16 and I need some serious help! I am in love with my best friend’s old girlfriend. She broke up with my friend after she realised that she did not like him anymore! He was really upset about it and I think he might still like her. I asked her to the school prom but I am too scared too tell my friend. Advice: Don’t worry about your friend if he is your true friend he will accept your love for her. You must find out first if she likes you before you sabotage your friendship! Otherwise I suggest you go to the prom with her as friends! By: Aishah Khan

Have you ever wanted to find out something interesting or get something fun into ‘Franc Mag’? Well now you can, my simple minded friends! Make statements, ask questions, send in embarrassing pictures, or make up a fun story! The fun just doesn’t stop in junk mail corner! The best letter or email each issue will get a star prize! Just don’t humiliate yourselves ok have some form of respect, he, he! So who am I, I hear you ask, well don’t bother. I hide in the shadows I am an international man of mystery! Email the ‘Junk mail dude’ if you dare at [email protected] From The Junk Mail Dude! PS: I will try to print all letters sent in depending on magazine space. I will endeavour to give you the best answer I can. Ok well most of the time, scouts honour boss!

Page 6: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 6

I am 11 and I have lots of spots and some boys tease me about it. It is so annoying! Please can u tell me how to get rid of them!

Spots are just one of those things that come along with growing up. If you keep your eyes open, you'll see that lots of people have them to one degree or another. You may be able to reduce them by talking to a pharmacist or doctor for advice if they are especially bad. I doubt the spots would bother you as much if it weren't for the teasing. Remember there's a lot more to you than a few spots and it’s the inside that counts the most. You might be able to deal with this situation if you tell a teacher or parent.

I have in the past 6 months become obsessed with the Internet! I can't stay off it! I have tried everything and I think it's taking over my life. Help!

Lots of kids and adults are finding themselves spending a lot more time on the Internet than ever before. When your time on the Internet starts to disrupt other stuff like schoolwork, time with friends and family, getting enough exercise, and other hobbies, it can be a problem. If you want to cut down on your habit, you'll have to use some discipline! Start by setting yourself a goal of the maximum time you're prepared to spend on the Internet maybe even make a timetable.

I feel really unhealthy. Most girls in my year have perfect bodies. I have no confidence. I give up on diets, my mum makes fatty dinners and I give in to easily.

While it's good to be concerned about things like nutrition and health, comparing your body to others isn't the best way to work out how healthy you are. If you're concerned about weight, height, the food you eat and the exercise you get, it's best to check that sort of stuff out with a doctor who will be able to advise you. It's really important to like yourself for who you are and to like your body too! Recognising that brings confidence, and confidence brings less worry about comparing yourself to others.

My friend has got head lice and I don't know how to tell her even some of my other friends have spotted them! What should I do?

It's really easy to get head lice at school and having them doesn't mean that you're dirty or gross or anything. Lots of kids (and grownups too) will get head lice at least once. Even though it's so common, it can be embarrassing so respect your friends privacy. It’s really important to be sensitive to people who have them. You might want to tell your friend what you think is going on and advise her to tell the school nurse, teacher or a parent. After a quick shampoo and comb-through she’ll be sorted.

An apple a day keeps a doctor away? Well, it doesn’t have to be an apple it can be any fruit or vegetable as long as it keeps the doctor away it doesn’t matter. Remember: to stay healthy you need at least 5 portions of fruit or veg everyday! By Ayesha

Page 7: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 7

Have you ever wondered what happens when Lanfranc pupils leave? Most move on to complete further education or vocational courses. However some achieve success at an even higher level. Below are a few Lanfranc pupils who have recently left. Read on and see where you can go if you work hard in school and follow your dream! Pupil: Clayfell Harris Sport: Basketball Honours: Surrey County U17 and Under 16 Information: Clayfell Harris used to come to Lanfranc and was a very talented pupil. After leaving The Archbishop Lanfranc Clayfell opted to continue his high school education in the US. He has graduated from Bridgeton Academy High school in 2007 and has received a four year basketball scholarship to at-tend Wagner College in New York City.

Pupil: Trevor Okoroafor Sports: Athletics Honors: Surrey County, Great Britain Team, Ranked 3rd at Under 20’s in the World in 2007. Information: Trevor left The Archbishop Lanfranc in 2006. He is now considered and thought of as the best triple jumper of his age in the whole of the UK. He was offered many scholarships from overseas but turned them down since he accepted an invitation to attend Loughborough University in 2008.

Pupil: Nick Paul Sports: Basketball Honours: London Towers Junior National League Team, Surrey County 2004-6 and England U18 Team. Information: Nick Paul is one of the most talented young basket players in the UK. This summer he was chosen to play for England in the 2007 European Championships in Bulgaria. Coach Alleyne was also there as an assistant coach in Bulgaria. Nick is now attending Centralia High School in the US.

Name: Leonie Donegan Sport: Basketball Honours: Leonie Donegan was also offered many scholarships. However, she opted to agree to attend High School in Oregon, USA. Information: Leonie is a highly talented player and quite rightly has impressed many other players. By Naveed Abbas and Coach Alleyne

Page 8: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 8

Name: Thierry Henry (Footballer) Date of birth: 17 August 1977 Born: Les Ulis (France) Height: 188 cm Weight: 83 kg Position: forward Club: Barcelona

Thierry Henry is a French football player. He is world class striker and plays for the French National Team and for FC Barcelona. He first played for AS Monaco as his senior club in 1995. He then moved to an Italian club

Juventus in 1998. But after a disappointing season he joined Arsenal for 10.5 million in 1999.He earned all of his respect from Arsenal. Henry became a top scorer at Arsenal. He struggled for a while in the Premiership but then got on with English football and became a top scorer for Arsenal for every season he was there. He became an all time scorer and a legend for Arsenal, scoring over 200 hundred goals. He also won two league titles and three FA Cups. Moreover, he was also nominated as a FIFA World Player of The Year. Henry gained everything from Arsenal except a UEFA Champions League Trophy – the only thing that was missing from his trophy cabinet. Henry came close to snatching one but it was just blown as Arsenal had lost to Barcelona in a UEFA Champions League final. The score line was 2-1 to Barcelona. Arsenal’s goalkeeper Jens Lehmann had received a red card in this final. Previously, he has also won an award of Barclay Premiership of the year. He made his name as a top footballer and was really ambitious to get the Champion’s league Trophy despite Arsenal struggling a little in last year’s Champions League competition. After eight years in Arsenal T-Shirt, Henry transferred to Barcelona FC for a fee of £16.1 million (far too cheap!). I think the reason he moved was because he really wanted that Champions League Trophy in his cabinet. Henry understands the Arsenal team is young and growing however Henry doesn’t have much time left in his football career therefore he choose to move on and begin a new challenge with FC Barcelona. You can imagine Henry playing alongside Ronaldhinio, Messi, Samuel E’to and others. You can imagine the football, beautiful football. Henry has currently scored six goals for Barcelona! Henry also plays for his French nation and has enjoyed success that he brought to his country. He has won 1998 World Cup with the French National Squad and Euro 2000. Piling up all his achievements, as a result he is regarded as one of the best footballers in the world. Learn more about Henry here at www.fcbarcelona.com By Naveed Abbas

Don’t miss the next star profile

In the next issue!

Page 9: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 9

Name: Amir Khan (Boxer) Date of Birth: 8 December 1986 Born: Bolton (England) Height: 178cm Weight: 63kg Coach: Oliver Harrison Hero: Muhammad Ali Amir Khan is a British boxer from Bolton, Greater Manchester, England. He is the IBF inter-continental light welterweight champion and he is the current Commonwealth lightweight champion, and is ranked no. 7 in the WBO world lightweight rankings. He went to Ruebnt Devonshire Road Primary School, Smithills High School and

Bolton Community College in Bolton. He was a hyperactive child and a born fighter, according to his father, who encouraged him to take up boxing. His hero is Muhammad Ali. Khan belongs to Janjua Rajput clan of Pakistan, which has a long and well documented history of warrior kings and a strong martial reputation. He often uses his position as a well-known British Muslim to encourage better relations between British Muslims and the wider community, particularly in his home town of Bolton. He is the older brother of boxer Haroon Khan and the younger cousin of cricketer Sajid Mahmood.

Amir Khan fighting Amir Khan and Amir Khan at his Amir Khan with Rachid Dilzane Steffy Bull 1st pro fight Colin Bain

Learn more, see pictures and press articles at www.amirkhan-boxing.com. By Maryam Ghaffar

Page 10: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 10

The adventures of Kung fu guy! (In Spanish!)

Page 11: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 11

By Afam Obi-Adewole

Competition! The first pupil to correctly translate Kung fu guy to Miss

Tebib will win a prize!

Page 12: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 12

Nokia 8800 Sirocco Gold So a 18 carat gold plated phone, hmm…not bad, eh? Perhaps this Nokia 8800 Sirocco Gold isn’t bad at all. It is scratch-resistant and it looks luxurious. It has got Bluetooth connectivity, email and a FM Radio. The Sirocco Gold mobile phone takes luxury handsets to a completely new level. The elegant curves of this phone make sure that this phone fits perfectly into anyone’s hand. The design of this phone is luxuri-ously elegant, this phone is gold. This is a well featured camera phone too. It has got a two megapixel lens in high quality colour. Yo! So what’s the cost? - It costs a whopping 449.99! Learn more at: www.carphonewarehouse.com

Nike Total 90 Laser Yes, yes it’s the Nike Total 90 Laser boot it has a significantly big ‘sweet spot’ through unique precision rings – that help control ball spin and trajectory. It has been designed for powerful shooting and will improve shooting accuracy. It has got soft leather inside for great fit and feel. It is an ultra light football boot with lots of impressive new features. Yo! So what’s the cost?- This ‘baby’ would set you back about £120! Learn more at: www.nikefootball.com

Anti gravity boots Boing! Put some spring in your step with what's sure to be the next big craze. Anti-Gravity Boots are utterly daft and immensely good fun. The sprung bases give you an extra and somewhat alarming lift with each bound. Yo! So what’s the cost?- Around £99.99! Learn more at: www.iwantoneofthose.com

Page 13: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 13

The iLuv i1055! This is a portable media player with universal iPod docker. It basically allows videos to be played from the iPod on a seven-inch LCD screen. The iPod is placed at the back and is simply played; the device also supports DVDs, VCDs and MP3 CDs. The good thing about it is that you can watch whatever you like and charge your IPod at the same time. It is out in shops and available in a black and white colour to match with the 5G iPods. It also comes with a three-hour rechargeable battery, headphones, remote control and with its smart looking case. Yo! So what’s the cost? - It costs about £149.99! - Learn more at: www.iLuv.com

Mario Strikers Charged football The game’s name is Mario Strikers Charged football. The game has got so many new features that I cannot fit them in here. The flow of football in this game is just totally crazy. It has got hazard filled pitches. You can do sidekick skill-shots, tactical team customisations, and players each have unique abilities and enhanced skills, plus much more. This game supports the Wi-Fi Connection service that allows players to take part in tournaments with others. The game uses the analogue stick on the nunchuck to move and enables players to make instinctive physical movements to achieve the desired effect within the game. Yo! So what’s the cost? It costs about £29.99! Web-links: wii.nitendo.com

By Naveed Abbas

Page 14: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 14

Are you worried about the future of the planet? Did you know that the earth’s resources won’t last forever? How can you help make things better? Follow the top tips below to become a greener person and help the environment! Here are my top 5 tips to help you reduce, reuse and recycle! 1.) Make a list Shopping lists help you buy just what you need rather than spending money on stuff you won’t use. It also means less packaging ends up in the bin. Attach some notepaper to the fridge with a magnet; that way it’s easy to jot down what you need, when you need it! 2.) Use a 'Bag for Life' This is a carrier bag which is strong enough to use again and again, so that you don’t need to throw away lots of plastic bags. Take it with you every time your family go shopping and if it does get a hole in it, the supermarket will recycle it and give you a new one for free! Make a fashion statement with a ‘bag for life’. Check out the coolest styles at your local supermarket. 3.) Use things as often as you can There are loads of things that don’t need to be thrown away, but can be used again and again. Here are a few examples: Paper – remember to use both sides! And then recycle it. Plastic bottles – rinse out empty bottles and re-fill them with more drink, or get creative and make them into something new like a model space ship or musical instrument. Clothes and toys – if you’ve grown out of them, or don’t want them any more, then why not pass them on to your brother, sister or friend or give them to your local charity shop. Try to think of other things that can be re-used. 4.) Recycle more stuff Remember to recycle as much as you can. Most people can recycle things like paper, cans and glass - you might have a special bin at home to put these in. Some people can recycle at school too! Have a look at ‘Where to recycle’ to find out what you can recycle where you live. Ask a grown up at home for your postcode. 5.) Pass on the recycling message Think about what you can do to recycle more at home and at school and become a recycling champion! Why not make it fun by setting all your family weekly recycling challenges – that way you can check that everyone is doing their bit. I hope you enjoyed reading my top tips… happy recycling! Remember together we can make a difference. Learn more at www.recyclenow.com. Don’t forget to recycle this magazine! By Jeffrey B!

Page 15: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 15

Are you creative and fancy strutting your stuff on the catwalk? Well this is an opportunity for you! Carnival Club takes place on Thursday after school and is open to all students. At this club we are making costumes based on the theme of Carnivals which you will then wear in a real catwalk show! The fashion show will take place at Addington High School in the new year

with a number of other Croydon school and it is a really exciting opportunity to produce some great costumes, have fun and show the other schools what tal-ented students we have here at Lanfranc! Don’t worry if you have not at-tended yet there is still time to create your stun-ning outfit, we are cur-rently working on hats, head dresses and masks!

Calling all budding designers! Could you be the next Christian Dior or Coco Chanel?

Carnival Club The Facts: • Where—Room 21

• When—At 2:35

• Further details— Ask Miss Giles Ca

rn

iva

l C

lub

T

ec

hn

olo

gy

De

pa

rt

me

nt

Page 16: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 16

My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes. I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long. "Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters."

Joke – Why did King Kong join the army? Answer- To learn about gorilla warfare. Joke – How can you mend King Kong's arm if he's twisted it? Answer- With a monkey wrench Joke – What do you do with a blue monster? Answer- Try and cheer him up Joke – What is the monsters' favourite football team? Answer- Slitherpool Joke – What is a monster's favourite game? Answer- Swallow the leader

Joke – What part of a football pitch smells nicest? Answer- The scenter spot Joke – Why aren't football stadiums built in outer space? Answer- Because there is no atmosphere Joke – What does a footballer and a magician have in common? Answer- Both do hat tricks Joke – Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear? Answer- Because he liked sole music Joke – Where do footballers dance? Answer- At a football

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Micro-soft, writing error messages!

Page 17: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 17

A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and puts his dog down on the examination table. The vet examines the still, limp body and after a few moments tells the man that his dog, regrettably, is dead. The man, clearly agitated and not willing to accept this, demands a second opinion. The vet goes into the back room and comes out with a cat and puts the cat down next to the dog's body. The cat sniffs the body, walks from head to tail poking and sniffing the dog's body and finally looks at the vet and meows. The vet looks at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but the cat thinks that your dog is dead too." The man is still unwilling to accept that his dog is dead. The vet brings in a black Labrador. The lab sniffs the body, walks from head to tail, and finally looks at the vet and barks. The vet looks at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but the lab thinks your dog is dead too." The man, finally resigned to the diagnosis, thanks the vet and asks how much he owes. The vet answers, "£650. "£650 to tell me my dog is dead?" exclaimed the man.... "Well," the vet replies, "I would only have charged you £50 for my initial diagnosis. The additional £600 was for the cat scan and lab tests."

A man told the ringmaster that he was interested in joining the circus as a lion tamer. The ringmaster asked if he had any experience and the man said, "Why, yes. My father was one of the most famous lion tamers in the world, and he taught me everything he knew." "Really?" said the ringmaster. "Did he teach you how to make a lion jump through a flaming hoop?" "Yes he did," the man replied. "And did he teach you how to have six lions form a pyramid?" "Yes he did," the man replied. "And have you ever stuck your head in a lion's mouth?" "Just once," the man replied. The ringmaster asked, "Why only once?" And the man said, "I was looking for my father."

By Nicholas Okoyomo

Page 18: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 18

Advice for Pupils We all know that bullying goes on in every school but it's the way it's dealt with which makes the difference between life being tolerable or a misery. Bullies are very cunning and are expert at getting away with it. Bullying includes:

· People calling you names · Making things up to get you into trouble · Hitting, pinching, biting, pushing and shoving · Taking things away from you · Damaging your belongings · Stealing your money · Taking your friends away from you · Posting insulting messages on the internet or on IM · Spreading rumours · Threats and intimidation · Making silent or abusive phone calls · Sending you offensive phone texts · Bullies can also frighten you so that you don't want to go to school, so that you

pretend to be ill to avoid them.

How to solve the problem! If you are being bullied, tell a friend, tell a teacher and tell your parents. It won't stop unless you do. It can be hard to do this so if you don't feel you can do it in person it might be easier to write a note to your parents explaining how you feel, or perhaps confide in someone outside the immediate family, like a grandparent, aunt, uncle or cousin and ask them to help you tell your parents what's going on. Your form tutor needs to know what is going on so try to find a time to tell him/her when it won't be noticeable. You could stay behind on the pretext of needing help with some work. If you don't feel you can do that, then go to the medical room and speak to the school nurse. The best idea is if a teacher can catch the bullies red-handed. That way, you won't get into bother from anyone for telling tales. It will be clear to everyone what has been going on. Don't be tempted to hit back because you could get hurt or get into trouble and hitting someone is an assault.

Page 19: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 19

Try to stay in safe areas of the school at break and lunchtime where there are plenty of other people. Bullies don't like witnesses. If you are hurt at school, tell a teacher immediately and ask for it to be written down. Make sure you tell your parents. Bullying is upsetting Bullying is very upsetting and if you feel you can't cope, tell your parents and go to see your doctor. Many doctors are very sympathetic about the effects of bullying and yours may be able to write a note for the school explaining the effect that bullying is having on your health. You could think about judo or martial arts classes so that you are confident you can look after yourself if necessary. If people are making nasty remarks about you then it may be because they are jealous. Perhaps you're better looking than they are or work harder or perhaps the teachers like you better. One way of dealing with remarks is simply to say ...yeah, whatever, .... each time so that you show them that it isn't having the effect of upsetting you in the way they think. The bullies will have worked out what buttons to push to make you upset. If you have any problems see a teacher! However if you don't want to see a Teacher learn more at www.bullying.co.uk or Contact them on [email protected] if you need more help. By Pakarnth Marmavijayan

See: www.bullying.co.uk

Page 20: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 20

What is the School Council? The Archbishop Lanfranc School Council is a group of pupils who are elected to represent you and your fellow pupils views on improving your school. They normally meet with a teacher present to discuss and sort out problems. These may include School lunches, behaviour or ideas for fund raising events. The School council members are responsible for carrying out the issues they have discussed for example; meeting with catering staff, writing articles for the school magazine, etc.

What jobs are there? Every year each class elects two representatives from each form to be members of the School Council. Their responsibilities are to attend whole School Council meetings once a term and year group council meetings. Pupils will then report back to their forms the discussion and decisions made at school council meetings. They also have a responsibility to bring any issues raised by pupils to the Council meetings. Eighty pupils meet altogether when the school council has a meeting.

Who gets elected? Each year group then elects from the form reps and two year reps who attend all School Council meetings which are held every half term. This information is then reported back in discussion and decisions to the year group Council meetings and at year group assemblies. At the beginning of this term your forms elected your form reps – some of you have elected your year group reps already.

Page 21: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 21

How do you get your views heard? Make sure that you make your views heard, see a Council representative! Remember you will have two representatives in your own form so just ask your tutor who they are! We look forward to hearing what you have to say about improving your School. By Ms Thompson

When was the last meeting and what happened? Our first whole School Council meeting was held on the 5th October and was well attended. Our new reps then elected the officers of the council, chair and vice chair who are in charge of meetings, the secretary and Press officer are in charge of minutes and writing articles for the school magazine, and finally the treasurer is in charge of money.

What can you do? School Council is about school improvement, you can make sure that you attend meetings if you are a rep and make sure that your tutor group knows what is going on and that they can make their views heard! If you are not a member you can find out who your reps are and what is going on. If you have any ideas make sure they bring them to the Council meetings.

Page 22: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 22

Can you crack the Riddle? – The first person to complete the riddle with the correct answers to Mr Cooper or Miss Giles will win a prize!

What has six faces but does

not wear makeup. It also has

twenty-one eyes, But cannot see?

Lanfranc riddle?

Sudoku Puzzle – The first person to complete it with all the correct answers to either Mr Cooper or Miss Giles will win a prize!

Remember the Lanfranc music awards survey we sent to you in your registers? Well the votes are in and have been counted and I can now we can reveal the results of the Lanfranc music awards. Best male artist Winners: Akon and 50 Cent Runner up: Chris Brown Best female artist Winner: Rihanna Runner up: Shakira Best music group Winner: G-unit Runner up: Gym class heroes

Best song Winner: Kiss kiss by Chris Brown Runner up: I wanna love you by Akon Best song genre Winner: RNB Runner up: rap Best album Winner: Good girl gone bad by Rihanna Runners up: The massacre by 50 cent

By Jermaine Bacon

Page 23: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 23

The Lanfranc Crossword Puzzle – The first person to complete it with all the correct answers to either Mr Cooper or Miss Giles will win a prize!

1 2

3 4

5

6 7

8

9 10

11

12 13

14

15

16

ACROSS 1. Which is the main river that runs through London? 2. In addition to The Simpson's, what other animated show did the same creator make? 5. What is Kanye West's latest album called? 7. What was the last James Bond film called? 8. Where is Amir Khan from? (Answer in Franc Mag!) 10. What football team is nicknamed the toffees? 11. 50 Cent and Justin Timberlake recently released a song together what was it called? 12. What colour is Ms Thompson’s hair? 14. What teacher Oscar award did Ms Giles win? 15. What football team does Mr Hostler support? 16. Who created the Simpson’s?

DOWN 1. Whose baby is Katie Holmes expecting? 3. Which team did Thierry Henry sign for? 4. What colour is the splat sign outside Mr Tormeys room? 6. Clayfell Harris was a former Lanfranc pupil who received a four year basketball scholarship to attend which College in New York City? (Answer in Franc Mag!) 9. Who helps Brain try to take over the world? 13.What is sponge bob square pants starfish friend called?

Please note some of the answers are hidden within articles within this magazine!

Page 24: Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: Page 1mr-dt.com/magazine/francmag2.pdf · We need pupils to write content and articles for the next issue of Franc Mag! Contact either Mr Cooper or

Franc Mag— Issue 2 Web site: www.francmag.co.uk Page 24