Professional Writing
Effective Workplace Writing
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Professional Writing
How do you feel about this sentence?
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After establishing the efficacy of leveraging the capacities of the employee-management interface, management opportunities will be promulgated throughout the multilateral interface effected by the relevant corporations.
Professional Writing
Johnny has a 7-page paper to write.
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He only has 5 pages worth of things to say.
What does he do???
FLUFF
Professional Writing
Fluff the following:
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Birds fly.
Here’s a version: Members of the bird family may flap their wings to get into the air.
Lard factor: 600%
Professional Writing
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Worse yet: Wings may be flapped by members of the bird family to enable them to get into the air.
700%Lard factor:
Professional Writing
Sally forgot to study that section, and there’s an essay question on it.
What does she do?
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BLUSTER
Professional Writing
Bluster the following: Birds fly.
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Here’s a version: Members of the bird family may perform certain actions whereby an effect is achieved.
Lard factor: 600%
(Okay, so it's not really a
Professional Writing
Tony the Classics major wants to impress the new boss with his intelligence and education.
What does he do?
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G(R)EEK
He forgets the boss is highly educated in engineering.
(and Latin)
Professional Writing
G(r)eek the following: Birds fly.
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Here’s a version: It is a fact that members of the avian species achieve an airborne condition through the means of feathered appendages.
Lard factor: 900%P. S. Trojans suck!
Professional Writing
Judas doesn’t want the clients to know he is up to no good.
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What does he do?
WEASEL
Professional Writing
Weasel the following:
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Here’s a version: It has come to our attention that the aeronautical device in question has experienced unforeseen challenges in the area of meeting the expected parameters.
Lard factor: 300%
Say what?
The $200M prototype plane doesn’t fly.
Professional Writing
What is the “official style”?
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Professional Writing
The official style uses too many passives, often imprecisely:
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The report will be completed at the time when it is required to be submitted.
The report will be completed at the time when it is required to be submitted.
We will complete the report by the deadline.
Professional Writing
The official style uses too many long, pompous words, often imprecisely:
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Pertinent missives are characterized by a cacophonous plethora of obfuscation, obsequiousness, obliquity, etc. contumaciously obtruding on your time constraints.
Lousy writing wastes time.
Professional Writing
The official style uses too many long, pompous words, often imprecisely:
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I say, that ursine juggernaut did assay to sup upon my person!
GO BRUINS!
(Russell Brand)
Professional Writing
Pop Quiz!
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Who said this?
“I am disinclined to acquiesce to your request.”
Professional Writing
The official style uses extra words, often confusing the reader:
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You agree that by registering on LinkedIn, or by using the our website, including our mobile applications, developer platform, premium services, or other information provided as part of the LinkedIn services (collectively “LinkedIn” or the “Services”), you are entering into a legally binding agreement with LinkedIn Corporation, 2029 Stierlin Court, Mountain View, California 94043, USA if you reside in the United States, and with LinkedIn Ireland Limited if you reside anywhere else in the world (“we,” “us,” “our,” and “LinkedIn”) based on the terms of this LinkedIn User Agreement and the LinkedIn Privacy Policy, which is hereby incorporated by reference (collectively referred to as the “Agreement”) and become a LinkedIn user (“User”). —http://www.linkedin.com/static?key=user_agreement
Professional Writing
The official style uses long embedded sentences, which both reader and writer can get lost in:
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The CBC which discourages the use of unreinforced masonry because of the risk of failure of a structure due to seismic instabilities along the identified and unidentified fault lines.
Professional Writing
The official style wastes ink, paper, bandwidth, time, money and patience.
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Professional Writing
How do we get rid of official style?
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Delete expletives: It is
There is
There are (Not *#%@!#%#)
Professional Writing
Practice getting rid of expletives:
It is a fact that bears like pork.
There are too many textbooks that cost over $100.
There is a bear prowling around at the bottom of this slide.
Professional Writing
How do we get rid of official style?
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Avoid using more than one or two prepositions in a sentence: Prepositions: aboard, about, above, across, after, against, along, amid, among, anti, around, as, at, before, behind, below, beneath, beside, besides, between, beyond, but, by, concerning, considering, despite, down, during, except, excepting, excluding, following, for, from, in, inside, into, like, minus, near, of, off, on, onto, opposite, outside, over, past, per, plus, regarding, round, save, since, than, through, to, toward, towards, under, underneath, unlike, until, up, upon, versus, via, with, within, without
Professional Writing
Limit prepositions.The CEO of the corporation that is under the
governance of the code that is used by every organization in a similar field as the one in question was asked by the employees of said corporation to assist in the achievement of higher rates of pay.
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The CEO of the corporation that is under the governance of the code that is used by every organization in a similar field as the one in question was asked by the employees of said corporation to assist in the achievement of higher rates of pay.
Professional Writing
Limit dependent clauses.The CEO of the corporation that is under the
governance of the code that is used by every organization in a similar field as the one in question was asked by the employees of said corporation to assist in the achievement of higher rates of pay.
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The CEO of the corporation that is under the governance of the code that is used by every organization in a similar field as the one in question was asked by the employees of said corporation to assist in the achievement of higher rates of pay. The employees asked the CEO for a raise because other workers in their position have better pay.
Professional Writing
How do we get rid of official style?
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Try to keep sentence length under 23 words.
Remove unneeded words.
Chop the sentence into pieces.into pieces.
Professional Writing
Chop up this sentence:
The CEO, after talking to the undersecretary and the boss after they return from their holiday where they networked with several potential clients and discussed contract issues with labor, will announce the delivery of the new computer systems, which will cost approximately $10, 000 due to inflation and special orders.
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Professional Writing
And now we'll consider some other aspects of professional writing.
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Professional Writing
Consider these words:
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• Posses
• Costumers
• Defiantly
• Mangers
• Apart of
• Upmost• aact.org, 2013
Professional Writing
Use these words carefully:
• Issues
• Different (instead of various)
• Amount
• Begging the question
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an argument taking for granted what it's trying to prove: "This class is popular because a lot of people want to take it."
Prompting
Professional Writing
Did you know you only have to space once after a period?
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Not: I like bears. They like honey. But: I like bears. They like honey.
Quick fact!
Professional Writing
Do these words mean the same thing?
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descending
falling
dropping
going down
tumbling
plummeting
plunging
diving
Connotations
Professional Writing
Which would you rather hear from the cockpit?
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Connotations
descending
dropping
going down
diving
beginning the descent for a water landing
The airplane isPan Am Flight 6, October 16, 1956
Pacific Ocean
Professional Writing
What’s the problem with this sentence?
You can drink alcohol in public in Atascadero.
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The General You
Professional Writing
Avoid vague words.
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Save Your Readers Time
A lot
Professional Writing
Avoid vague words.
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Save Your Readers Time
Large
Professional Writing
Avoid ambiguous statements.
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Save Your Readers Time
Although native to Japan, Manila clams are becoming increasingly popular in the United States and can be found in the seafood section of most supermarkets. — Bon Apétit, June 2010
Professional Writing
I will call contractors to take the stumps out. Some of them are really thick.
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Avoid ambiguous statements.
Professional Writing
Use jargon only for appropriate audiences:
Special moment connection
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Necking zone
Elastic perfectly plastic
Professional Writing
Quick tip:
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In order to = To
In order to eat a banana, you must peel it.
To eat a banana, you must peel it.
The reason . . . is because . . . = becauseOther cuts
Professional Writing
Proofread.
By the standards of the West Coast, where earthquakes are much more common, the Virginia quake was mild. Since 1900, there have been 40 quakes of magnitude 5.8 or greater in California alone. There have been 43 of magnitude 6 or greater.
—8/23/11 Quake rocks Washington area, felt on East Coast By BOB LEWIS - Associated Press
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Twice. Or More.
Professional Writing
Proofread.
Even tied up, I'm going to get cited for leaving my dog by a bench, as if he could attack someone all tied up.
— March 2, 2012 The Tribune
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Twice. Or More.
Professional Writing
What is the most important element of a communication?
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What is the second most important element of a communication?
Purpose
Readers
Professional Writing
The Endfor now
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Always put yourself in your reader’s place.
Professional Writing
After I interviewed him I was surprised to hear how much he liked his job.
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