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To a man, the world is at all times covered in an all-encompassing shade of completely logical reasoning. When things are plainly laid out in a plain and rational fashion, the man’s inner planets are fully aligned – when things aren’t plainly laid out right in front a man, he gets frustrated and impatient.
Emotions, being some of the least logic-conducive things in the entire world, are naturally an exceedingly complex thing in a man’s mind. The feeling of love can be exceedingly difficult for aman to properly explain without the use of a dictionary at hand – then again, the concept of love has eluded a universally unanimous definition for thousands of years.
Now, why exactly do you think this is the way that it is? Why doyou think it is that emotions are so good at completely defying over two-hundred thousand years of attempts to denotatively classify them?
Well, to put it a bit simplistically, emotions are relatively intricate – and by relatively, I mean extremely. Being that emotions are as intricate as they are, the feelings that we have can very well tend to have more than a couple of diverse effects.
Feelings can turn everyday situations into almost unnaturally beautiful and deep portraits of the human experience that inspire poets to write, but they can also have some slightly less-than-pretty pictures. Feelings have just as much of an ability to distort and confuse as they have to beautify,
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especially when it comes to a man.
Because of the absolutely confounding nature of feelings and how much they dictate the way the world runs on a daily basis, paired with a man’s oftentimes less-than-stellar emotional introspective, it is easy to understand why a man prefers to keep things as simple as possible.
When a woman has an ability to keep things as simple as possible, instead of convoluting things further with her feelings,a man gets a feeling of his own that makes him feel like he’s legitimately found himself a catch.
A man’s worst nightmare is a woman that seems to live for ability to make things as complicated as possible, seemingly knocked off balance by the ebb and flow of her own emotional fluctuations. A man who has reluctantly committed to a complicated woman is a man who does not walk, but struggles to bounce across the Earth from within a cage.
Now in talking about the nature of feelings and what they implyfor the man that loves for the simple things, and your possible relationship with him, we absolutely cannot ignore how feelings affect that little thing we call communication.
Did you know that there is just one, short, stupidly simple sentence that you can use in order to make a man follow through on what you ask him to do every single time? Believe itor not, such a thing does exist outside of the realm of hyperbole.
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When you learn the best way to employ this ultra-simple sentence, you will understand exactly what it takes in order to make your man return to a certain point in the relationship thatyou need him to if the time ever arises.
If you ever find yourself in a situation in which you seriously need your man to heavily prioritize exactly what it is that you’resaying, then this simple sort of sentence than I’m going to share with you is going to provide you with what you need in order to make it happen.
So, what exactly is this extremely simple miracle sentence that I’m talking about here?
It’s nothing more than the “I know you would not”statement.
When you use the statement “I know you would not”, you are expressing an indirect impression that gets planted into the man’s mind at a level so deep that even he himself may not even be complete aware of it.
When you use “I know you would not” in a statement, you are illustrating to your man (in a delightfully subversive kind of way) that you have certain expectations of him and the things that he does. It’s not the same as outright forbidding him from doing something, but what you’re doing is instead making a declarative statement about his capabilities.
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Now here’s where’s the magic of the “I know you would not” statement shines through. The statement basically puts your man in a position in which, if he breaks the statement, he will be:
A) Breaking your trust in him, as you’ve indicated that you KNOW that he’ll never disappoint you
In addition to that,
B) In disappointing you so heavily, the man will also feel like hehas incurred some legitimate consequences due to not followingthrough on his word
Don’t forget that any man, when provided with the option, would prefer comfort over having to deal with pain.
Pleasant stimuli are always more inviting than painful stimuli, and so naturally, we are psychologically fine-tuned to subconsciously pursue the former and reject the latter. It doesn’t take very long into any human being’s life to begin learning how to differentiate between what creates pleasure and what creates pain.
We want the good, and we stay away from the bad – of course it sounds extremely simplistic, because it is, but don’t a whole lot of things in life just suddenly seem a lot less complex when you just put things that way?
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So, naturally, you’d now like to know exactly how you’d go about using a simple sentence like this in an every day. Chances are that you could use a little bit more guidance in the ways of using this phrases other than just slapping “I know you would not” in front of everything – I’m going to help you out with that.
Well now, before we even start talking about when to use the statement, let’s actually preface things by talking about the structure of the statement instead of only just when to use the statement.
When you’re thinking about the best way to formulate the sentence, you should first make sure that you understand that you have two choices in this formula: would not oris not. You are going to let him know that you know that he would not nor is he ever going to let you down – it’s demanding, yes, but the beauty in it is that it truly demands nothing at all.
The thing that you’re communicating here is that there truly is absolutely no question in your mind about exactly what the probability is of your man doing this or that when it comes to following through on your expectations. Because you will be prefixing it with a compliment, it will not be as immediately resisted as an outright demand of something.
Now let’s just take a moment to assess the notion of what it would look like to express to your man that you expect something of him with the use of this formula. All you would have to say is something as simple as:
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“I know you wouldn’t disappoint me.”
It’s legitimately just as simple as that. All that you have to do ismake the basic statement that you know that you won’t be disappointed, and just like a matrix of obligation and purpose will begin to connect like brand new neural synapses in your man’s brain.
So why is it such a done deal when you word things in this fashion? It’s because when you make a declarative statement about what you know your man is capable of, it’s actually more than just a simple matter of the expectation within that gets created – what you’re doing is actually playing your man’s sense of pride to your advantage.
You see because the expectation isn’t just that your man will dosomething, but that he won’t be deficient, you’re basically forcing the man to challenge what he believes he is capable of in terms of what you said was within his abilities.
Even if he doesn’t really tend to question his ability to do the specific things you have in mind for him on a regular basis, having a woman speak fondly of what he is capable of will be like a racetrack gun popping off in his brain that sets his ambitions to running at full steam ahead.
Now imagine that you just wanted your man to exhibit a certainlevel of loyalty towards you in order to feel completely secure about the relationship. You obviously wouldn’t just spit out
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something to the effect of, “Hey, man, you better be loyal to meor you’re going in the slow cooker.” – that’s just going to give you the opposite of what you want.
No, if you want to ensure that your man feels a deeper drive to be more loyal to you, with the help of this formula, then what you’re going to be looking to do is make sure that your desire for his loyalty is layered in a compliment, just like in the very first example.
What you’re going to be looking to say is something to the effect of this:
“I know that you’re not like other men out there, so I don’t worry about you cheating on me.”
See how ingeniously subtle and yet direct a statement like this really is? When you’re using this statement in the context of requesting loyalty, you’re making the man’s own capacity for loyalty appear to him like a standard that he has to live up to and not just an offhand request or, even worse, nagging.
You are basically ensuring that you can deliver the sentiment of your expectation without the risk of your man thinking that you’re just trying to force him into being your model Ken doll without any soul or autonomy within him to refuse your requests.
You’re basically going to be ensuring that he doesn’t go on thinking that you don’t think he has it within him to do this or
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that – you’re ensuring that he goes forth with it being imprintedin his mind that you have nothing less than the greatest amount of faith in what he’s capable of, and this will motivate him to challenge himself to live up to it.
At the very least, when he’s feeling like he may be lacking in the willpower department, a statement like this will get your man to thinking about the time that you complemented him on whatever quality was relevant – strength, honesty, loyalty, etc. When he thinks about it, he’s going to feel a pressure in the moment not to fail that expectation you have.
So now do you see just how effectively statements like this can take away from the dreaded complexity of dealing with things like feelings and emotions? Rather than feeling like you have to jump through a bunch of hoops to see eye to eye with your man, a simple well-placed sentence such as this can smoothly set your guy on the right track.
You might be just a tad bit worried that he could lose the inherent meaning of what you’re implying, worry not – the way that these phrases are worded was intentionally designed for there to be absolute bare minimum in terms of the margin for error. The statements are kept extreme simple and direct, and yet at the same time, they trigger serious feelings.
In a sense, the incredibly basic nature of the statements is whatmakes them so effective at leaving a critical impact. Feelings are complex, but a man’s pride, no so much – his pride is directly connected to the regulation of his feelings, and so when
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you effectively put his pride into action, you are activating all ofhis feelings associated with it at the same time.
There will be absolutely no doubt in your man’s mind about exactly what it is that you want or what you meant by the simple statement. You are going to have created a blunt and yet gracefully delivered vehicle for the delivery of your words, without making things too convoluted or abstract in the process.
You are going to be making it an extremely simple matter for your man to understand exactly what the difference is between either following through on or ignoring your expectations for him – either he proves himself worthy of the praise that you gave, or he risks being interpreted as a bit of fraud that can’t be counted on.
Even if you aren’t the type who would necessarily hold too much against your man for making an honest mistake, the fact that he will think that he’s being tested will essentially kick him into a mild form of fight-or-flight mode that’s determined to avoid being discounted at all costs.
So, once again, let’s take ourselves just a bit of time to work over these steps in the simplest of terms. All that you’re lookingto do with this technique is communicate to your man that you know that there is something that you know he won’t let you down in – after you state exactly what that is, your next step is to simply indicate why you know so.
The why of the equation, in this case, is just as crucial as the
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“what” that we’re dealing with. When you’re telling your man exactly why you believe that he won’t let you down, you shouldn’t need to struggle too much in order to come up with something that seems legitimate. Simply state that he possesses a positive quality, and that’s all.
Saying “I know” will establish the expectation, and clarifying why will cement that expectation as something that the man is going to consider in his mind as something he very well should be able to do without any issue – after all, you did say that we was capable of it!
Now I just have to give you one more little example so that youcan fully digest the gravity of what I’m talking about here. In this final example, we’re just going the cover the case in which you’d like to communicate to your man that you’d just like for him to make more of an effort at communicating with you.
If you’ve been following this closely so far, though, then you know that you’re not literally going to be telling your man that you want him to start communicating with you more openly – what you’re doing to do is completely remove that element of desire in your wording, which implies there’s a chance for him to not communicate more openly.
So, as we’ve already covered, the first thing that you’re going to do is come in with the transition phrase “I know you would not” – this is essential! After you’ve led in with “I know you would not”, you will then proceed to further cement your confidence in his guaranteed success in satisfying you by providing a legitimate reason behind why you think he’s the
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best kind of guy in the world to do the job.
After you’ve given that reason why you think he’s so well-suitedfor the task, you can just leave it at that. You don’t need to try too hard to invent a reason why he’s so well-suited to help you out, as it’s as simple as telling him that he knows the proper way to treat a lady.
If you still want to embellish a little bit more without totally overdoing it, one route that you can go is saying something to this effect:
“ I feel so secure in your presence, and I know that I can trust
you to be honest and open with me, because I know you’re the
kind of a guy who knows how to treat his woman right.”
Now no matter what a man’s priorities are and what his
perspective of greatness is, can you honestly say that there’s
any man out there who could honestly identify a statement like
that as something that isn’t objective positive? Could any man
with a sense of pride legitimately feel good about himself for
proving a woman who said he had good character wrong?
Can you see a man compromising every last bit of his integrity
for absolutely no reason? Chances are that unless that man
isn’t actually even a human being, he’s going to be highly
unlikely to contradict the glowing statement that you’ve made
about him.
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It’s not a tremendously difficult thing to understand the source
of the Simple Sentence tactic’s power. The reason that the
tactic works so well is simply owed to the fact that, due to you
giving him a suitable sense of motivation, the man instantly
became significantly more likely to prioritize your needs.
To top it off, you have accomplished the considerable feat of
being able to directly and openly communicate exactly what you
want without your man feeling like you were burdening him or
dancing around the subject.
It really is impossible for me to stress this point enough, so I’ll
repeat it once again just for good measure: for a man, there
are very few things in the world that are more important than
the basic concept of respect – not so surprisingly, that is one of
the reasons why this technique works as powerfully as it does.
Think of why it is that just about any person refuses to do
anything, regardless of what that thing they’re being told to do
actually is. Beyond being unable to or simply not wanting to do
it, what do you think is the critical factor in taking the initiative
to do something that is just missing when someone else
commands us to act?
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You probably guessed it – that missing critical factor that we’re
talking about here is respect. When we get the sense that
someone is just trying to force us to do something without
paying any heed to what it may be that we want, it makes us
feel like our autonomy is being rejected and that our personal
motivations are being belittled – THAT is disrespect.
When you feel that someone who tells you something is actually
a person who understands your right as a human being to act
of your own accord, however, things are different. The
rebellious knee-jerk reaction doesn’t occur if we don’t suddenly
get the alarming sense that our individuality is under attack.
With this simple sentence technique, you are seeing to it that
your man doesn’t feel like you’re attempting to call his ability to
regulate his own actions into question. The issue with forcing
someone to do something is that, while you are indeed
acknowledging the fact that they are capable of performing an
action, you are treating them as a mere tool.
The difference between an order and a technique like this,
however, is that this technique is based in the fact that the
person themselves is valuable instead of just what they have to
offer you as a conduit of whatever they can perform.
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A man whose woman only asks him to do things out of
convenience, instead of expressing any gratitude for what he is
actually capable of on his own, is going to feel like he is just
being used in a manner similar to a farm animal, and of course,
vice versa as well.
A lot of men and women and like are completely clueless to the
reality of how imperative it is to acknowledge romantic partners
as people first and means to and end last, but even with the
purest of intentions, you’ve got plenty of people women
unwittingly wrecking their relationships by letting it slip their
minds.
The truly scary thing about the existence of the simple sentence
structure is the implication of what so many couples are doing
to themselves every day by not using simple sentence structure
effectively. Truth be told, you don’t necessarily need to be an
abusive or malicious person to make your partner feel used by
not wording your desires tactfully enough.
We’d all love to be able to have our partner pick up on the love
in the things that we do through nothing but osmosis, but at
the end of the day, word do tend to sometimes get in the way.
How often could a major fight between a man and woman be
avoided were it not for just one or two words being taken the
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wrong way?
Essentially, with the simple sentence technique, what we are
attempting to do here is potentially mitigate any and all
misunderstandings that may potentially arise as a result of
certain things getting lost in translation from your words to his
ears.
First and foremost, we keep things simple in order to control for
the margin of error. When a man doesn’t immediately want to
do something that’s asked of him that he doesn’t immediately,
all you need is a couple of seconds before parents become
insult ammunition and one side of the bed gets a little bit colder
for the night.
Because our phrases here are extraordinarily short and sweet,
however, there’s not the presence of very many different gaps
or holes in the delivery to be picked up and used as a reason
not to do what was suggested.
Of course, that simplicity would only be noteworthy were that
the only unique feature about them. Where these simple
sentences truly shine is their ability to turn just about any
request for help or work into a compliment, which greatly
mitigates the chances that whomever is being asked will feel
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more like they’re being utilized than appreciated.
Now that you know how to avoid unintentionally making your
man feel like livestock and understand how to instead
constructively build a bridge between communication and
encouragement, the future for your relationship has the
potential to result in a lot fewer expensive things getting
broken.
You now understand that when it comes to being able to get
your man to see your point of view, it can never hurt to express
just a little bit of gratitude for the fact that you have a man to
try and sweet-talk in the first place.
In the time that I’ve seen people using the technique for fairly
mundane purposes, I’ve observed something fantastic and
relatively unexpected occur as a result.
It would seem that the more couples actually dedicated time to
actually expressing gratitude for what kind of person the other
was as an individual, instead of focusing on only what needed
to get done, the more they actually came to appreciate one
another as a people in general.
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When I think of this, I recall a study I once read in which the
claim was supported that people who smile more often actually
exhibit a higher likelihood to report strong levels of life
satisfaction, even if the major things in their life weren’t
immediately pleasant or convenient.
In an even more striking study, people who have had botox
injections – which can cause the corners of the mouth to
tighten up and curl into a quasi-permanent pseudo-smile a side
effect of the botulinum toxin- actually tended to report higher
levels of happiness on a day to day basis, even while having no
immediate objective differences in lifestyle from those who had
gone without surgery.
Now of course this isn’t an announcement to go out and get a
botox injection right this instant, but in the context of what
we’re discussing right now, it raises a particularly interesting
point of perspective. It would seem that when we go through
the motions to emulate positive feelings, at some point, those
feelings become more real.
It isn’t to say that your feelings for your man aren’t already real
enough already, but I have actually come to find that the
women who use this simple sentence technique most often
actually happen to start feeling deeper levels of attraction to
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and admiration for their partner as a result of constantly saying
good things about them. Imagine that!
If that same could be true for the positive feeling that you get
from your own partner, could you not perhaps see the merit in
trying it out? If you could have the strong feelings that you
already harbor towards your man somehow actually intensified
due to the fact that you are reinforcing your feelings on a daily
basis, is that not worth an experiment?
As scary as the effects of not using simple phrases to express
your appreciation can be, the potential benefits of just taking a
bit of time out of every day to let your man know that he’s a
special guy in your world can be absolutely tremendous.
Just think of all of the hoops that so many other couples have
to jump through on a daily basis just to feel like they can make
it through the day without wanting to put one another in the
washing machine! Some couples will pay several college
tuitions-worth in vacation suites and yet still struggle to find a
not-terrible word to say about one another by the holidays.
Now of course, grand romantic gestures are just fine if you’ve
got the flair for them and know all of your man’s allergies.
Going above and beyond now and then certainly won’t hurt
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your chances when it comes to having your man do more of the
things that you like, more on a more consistent basis, but the
point still stands that simple simply works.
We can’t get so caught up in we’d like our man to do that we
forget about intrinsic value of the man himself, and we cannot
become so wrapped up in the extravagance of how we express
gratitude that we actually come to take the pure concept of
gratitude itself for granted.
By simplifying your words, you are actually making one of the
most incredible advancements to the modern relationship
possible – forgetting about the fluff and instead just focusing on
the fundamentals. You like your man, or perhaps you even love
him. That’s great! You enjoy him for the things he can do, and
the things about him that make him capable of doing those
things! Even better, you should tell him that! Done those things
already? You’re golden, no need to over think the rest.
You see, personal communication is wonderful, but some people
are understandably beginning to consider it something of a
dying art form – with all of the technology and instant media
access around us that molds 21st century Earth, can we really
blame people for mourning the good old fashioned spoken
word?
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We have come to a place now in history where, if desired, a
person may very well be able to go about the rest of their lives
and function in civilized society without ever having to speak a
single word to anyone if they didn’t wish to.
We have grown accustomed to taking time to meticulously
craft,fine-tune and spellcheck our mundane messages before
they reach the listener. Raw and genuine communication has
become what a lot of people may start to describe as archaic –
with this technique, however, you counteract that grim
premonition.
Simply stating to your man you find him an amazing person will
cut through all of the static of automatically-filtered text
messages that flicker in and out of his mind 24 hours a day. If
your man works an office job, then being able to hear that
someone legitimately appreciates him for something not related
to a deadline may affect him more powerfully than you know.
The authenticity of your feelings for him will be recaptured in
the way that there is no filter between he himself and what
you’ve conveying to him. A backrub can say “relax”, a bottle of
wine and dinner and can say “congratulations, but “you are
amazing” always says “you are amazing”.
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Now, considering how refreshing it will be for your man to hear
a simple token of affection from you on what could be a
relatively unremarkable day, can’t you see why this might very
well make him more prone to doing things for you that you
love?
If your man legitimately associates you with the source of all
that makes him feel validated and important, don’t you think
he’s going to be a lot less likely to jeopardize his loyalty to you?
If you make him feel important, strong, loved, intelligent and
worthwhile, don’t you think he’ll be a bit less prone to doing
things that may suddenly make the source of all of that
disappear?
The confidence in how you assert that he will always pull
through for you and how you know that he won’t disappoint you
aren’t only going to start making you feel for your man on a
deeper level, but they’re going to have an effect on your man
as well!
There’s a powerful teaching concept referred to as inculcation.
Basically, inculcation is when the retention of a learned lesson
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in your memory is multiplied due to the fact that it is repeated
at an especially consistent basis. Now, remember what I
mentioned before about the effect of just smiling more often?
Repeating genuine, simply-worded vouches of confidence in
your man’s value to him will actually be psychologically
conditioning him to believe those things even more than he
already did.
He will legitimately feel more powerful, reliable, and loyal to
you just from hearing those things from you on a consistent
basis – this not only makes him more dependable by default,
but also increases the feeling he has that you are someone in
his life that he legitimately does not have the option of letting
down.
Once you have done this enough, it will be equally force of habit
both for you to remind your man of what he means to you and
for him to respond in kind by doing the best he can to live up to
everything that you’ve built him up to be – it is legitimately a
win-win situation for you both!
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