LeaderHints

Leadership Development TipsFor Groups

Dealing withDifficult Members

Quick TipsTHE S EVEN “C’S” OF DEALING WITH DIFFICULTMEMBERS

COMPLIMENTDifficult members need sincere praise, too .

CONCERNGenuine caring f or the welfare of anotherwill help bui ld a strong relationship .

CONGRATULATIONSHelping people who see themselves aslosers to feel like winners can eliminatesome problems.

COMPROMISEAttempting to “give” a little may soften ahard person.

CHOICEGiven a choice, a person may feel importantand respond in a positive w ay.

CHALLENGEBoredom may cause people to react indifficult ways.

CONFIDENCEExpressing confidence in someone is oftenall he or she needs to hav e confidence.

Q U I C K

For further assistance with all aspects ofstudent event planning, scheduling andorganizing please seek an appointment withthe Student Activities Staff or theappropriate ASUN Executive Officer.

For more information, call 784-6589

Leader Hints is a publication of theUniversity of Nevada, Reno StudentActivities Department.

This information was compiled with leadership materials from the: University of Texas San Antonio University of Kansas University of New Mexico University of Nevada, Reno

Office of Student Activities

LEADER HINTSAre available on the following topics:

· Conflict Resolution· Constitution & Bylaws

· Delegation· Difficult Member

· Event & Program Planning· Fundraising· Goal Setting· Icebreakers

· Meetings & Minutes· Motivation

· Officer Transition· Recruiting New Members

· Retreats· Stress Management

· Team Building· Time Management

" Difficult people” ar e found in ever y or ganization. I t is impor tant that the leader lear n to deal effectively with these individuals and ensure that their behav-ior s and attitudes do not adver sely affect the group’s functioning.

H ere are six types of difficult behavior s that can be found in many group settings and some tips on how to deal with each.

T I PS

· Stand up for yourself or the group if they are out of order· Give them time to wear out· L ook directly at them and wait· Get into the conversation· Get their attention· Make sure they are seated, not standing over you· Don’ t argue or try to cut them down

· L isten attentively to them· A cknowledge them by paraphrasing their concerns· Don’ t agree with or apologize for their allegations· Put them in charge of “fixing” what they think is wrong· A sk, “how do you want this situation to be remedied?”

· Don’ t interrupt silence; give them time to open up· Ask open-ended questions· L isten attentively if they open up, but don’ t gush· I f they will not open up, end the meeting and set up another

appointment.

· L et them know you value them as people· A sk them to be honest with you· Carefully point out inconsistencies in their behavior (without

judgement)· L isten to their humor, as there may be messages hidden in their

comments.

· B e alert to avoid being pulled into their despair· Don’ t try to argue them out of their pessimism· L isten to their messages — the root of the pessimism may be

hidden there· Play “devil’s advocate” by thinking about negatives and

having solutions ready.

· K now what you are talking about when you converse withthem

· L isten attentively, then paraphrase the main points they make· Question firmly about inaccurate facts or inconsistencies, but not in a group situation.

T Y PE DE SC R I PT I ON

H OST I L E A G G R E SSI V E S Try hard to bully and overwhelm bybombarding others with cutting remarks

C OM PL AI NE R S Gripe without ceasing, but never try to doanything about what they complain about

SI L E NT UNR E SPONSI V E S A nswer with grunts or one syllableresponses (when they answer at all)

SUPE R A G R E E A B L E S V ery personable, funny members who neveract the way they say they will or how youthought they would

NE G AT I V I ST S Never expect anything to work and neverhave anything positive or nice to sayabout anything or anyone

K NOW -I T -A L L Condescending, pompous people who claimto know all about everyone and everything

You may not be able to successfully deal with every difficult member in your group. Use these strategies, and any others you come up with, to practice dealing withdifficult people — and keep your eye on the “big picture,” reaching toward your goals!