craccum - university of auckland · craccum extends its congratulations to mr. sullivan,...

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Weather Report CRACCUM A Cert. Adult Recommendation. GRADUATION and ELECTION EDITION V ol. V. No. 9 AUCKLAND UNIVERSITY COLLEGE, AUGUST 13th, 1931 P rice 3d. THE ELECTION CAMPAIGN SULLIVAN FOR PRESIDENT CANDIDATES FOR THE EXECUTIVE P aterson, E dward B ennis: St. An- drew’s College Prefect; House Committee 1931 ; Social Committee 1931 ; Grad. Ball Committee 1931 ; Musical Club Committee; Arts stu- dent. The College is at present in the throes of the Annual Elections. The Presidential Election was held last Thursday and resulted in a substan- tial victory for Martin Sullivan. Sully is perhaps the youngest man to have become President of the Auckland University College, and as he is still an active student his personal touch with the mass of the students augurs well for the success of his period of office. Martin Sullivan’s record has already been more or less truthfully chronicled in a previous issue, so we shall forbear further eulogy. Craccum extends its congratulations to Mr. Sullivan, acknowledges the long and faithful service of his opponent, Mr. Robins, and the retiring President, Mr. Wilson, and prophecies a popular and profitable term for the new head. A very keen contest for the W o- men’s Vice-Presidentship took place, and Craccum’s congratulations go to Miss Turner on attaining to the office for which her long period of student service has fitted her. THE EXECUTIVE ELECTION It has long been felt that the small- ness of College polls is in some mea- sure due to the lack of information the average student has about the majority of the candidates. We pub- lish therefore a list of the candidates with a resume of their qualifications and records. W e wish students to understand, however, that we have no intention of electioneering, and that our notes are bare impartial reports. * = Sitting Member. / ^R obins, E ugene Dumont: Auck- land Grammar School; Junior Uni- versity Scholar; M.Sc. 1928; M.A. 1929; Senior Scholar; Sec. Tennis Club; S.C.M. Committee; Member Stud. Ass. Exec. 1*927-28-29-31; Secretary Stud. Ass. 1928-29; Occupation, High School Teacher. Blow, E ric H arold: Auckland Grammar School; Deb. Soc. Com. 1929- 31 ; Lit. Club Com. 1931 ; Social Com. 1931 ; Athletic Club Com. 1931 ; Stud. Ass. Exec. 1931 ; B.A. 1931 ; Teacher, Arts and Commerce Faculties; Editor Crac- cum 1931. Hill, A lan R.: Auckland Gram- mar; Dep.-Capt. Harrier Club; Sec. Grad. Ball Committee 1931 ; Lit. Club Exec. 1929-30-31 ; Occupa- tion, Law Clerk. I Mulgan, J ohn A.: Auckland Grammar Prefect; Junior Scholar; Editor Craccum 1930; Social Com- mittee 1930-31 ; Carnival Com- mittee 1931 ; Literary Club 1930- 31 ; Hon. Sec. Football Club 1931 ; Nominated Rhodes Scholar 1932; Full-time Arts student. I C allis, Nancy E.: Epsom Girls’ Grammar Prefect; Lit. Club Exec. 1930- 31 ; Deb. Society Committee 1931 ; Commerce Society 1930-31 ; College Hockey rep. 1930-31 ; Hockey Com. 1931 ; Commerce Student. I i Archibald, S heila B etty: Auck- b' land Girls' Grammar Prefect; Sin- clair Scholar 1927; Pres. S.C.M. 1930; House Committee 1929; Field Club Committee; Stud. Ass. Exec. 1931; B.A. 1931; Teacher, Arts faculty. MARTIN GLOUSTER SULLIVAN, B.A. Photo Courtesy “ StarCourt, E velyn R ose: Auckland Girls’ Grammar Prefect; House Committee 1931 ; Hon. Sec. Basket- ball Club 1930-31 ; Social Com- mittee 1931 ; Stud. Ass. Exec. 1931 ; B.A. 1931 ; Arts student. d’E sterre, Diana F rances: Auck- land Girls’ Grammar Prefect; Field Club Committee; Publications Com- mittee 1931; B.A. 1931; Arts Student. Macky, R uth : Epsom Girls’ Gram- mar Prefect; Lit. Club Committee 1931; House Committee 1931; Arts student. Milne, L ovelace: Dioscesan H .S .; House Committee 1931 ; Arts student. Mulgan, Dorothea: Nelson Girls’ College Prefect; Lit. Club Com- mittee 1931 ; Hon. Sec. House Committee 1931 ; Arts student. P aul, David B lackwood: Hamilton H .S. Prefect; Junior University Scholar; Lit. Club Committee 1928- 29-30-31 ; Publications Committee 1929-31; S.C.M. Committee 1930- 31; B.A. 1930; Hon. Sec. Carni- val Committee 1930; Law Clerk. Monro, David H ector: Auckland Grammar; Lit. Club Committee 1929-30-31 ; Publications Com- mittee 1929-31; B.A. 1931; Carni- val Committee 1930; Arts student. Colley, A nthony Donaldson: Downside College (Eng.) ; Hon. Treas. Hockey Club 1931 ; Vice- Pres. Hongi Club 1931 ; Science faculty. Y ockney, C live S. W .: Auckland Grammar; Junior Univ. Scholar; House Committee 1931; Senior Scholar; B.A. 1931 ; Arts student. McC ulloch, N. A. : Auckland Grammar; Hon. Sec. Rifle Club 1930-31 ; Engineering faculty. W ilson, T homas: Auckland Gram- mar; Teacher, Arts faculty. B arker, W illiam L.: Sacred Heart College; Hon. Sec. Deb. Society 1931; N.Z.U. Double Blue 1931 (hootball and Boxing) ; Arts student. A dams, Geoffrey Owen : Auckland Grammar; Junior Univ. Scholar; Deb. Soc. Committee 1931 ; B.A. 1931 ; Law Clerk. D umble J ohn: Auckland Gram- mar school; B.Sc. 1927; Research Chemist; Author Varsity Play 1927; Arts student. Martin, J ohn F rederick: Auck- land Grammar School; Engineering student. E llison, Norman J oseph: Auck- land Grammar School; Hockey Blue 1930; Hockey Club Captain 1931 ; Chairman Hockey Social Committee 1931 ; College Hockey Rep. 1929-30-31; B.Sc. 1931; Bacteriologist. Science Faculty. *G rey, R alph F. A.: Wellington College Prefect; Junior University Scholar; Stud. Ass. Exec. 1931 ; Chairman Social Committee 1931 ; Law Society Committee 1930-31 ; Law Clerk. H arkness, E uan W.: Nelson Col- lege; Architectual Society; Archi- tecture student; Hongi Club; Arts and Engineering student. R obertson, F red. H.: Mt. Albert Grammar Head Prefect; Arts stu- dent. Cooper, W illiam H. : Auckland Grammar School; Junior Univer- sity Scholar; T.C. Exec.; Arts student. UNIVERSITY BLAZERS Under contract to the Auckland University College Students’ Association (Inc.) to supply University Blazers, the George Court Store gives the fullest possible value. Blazers are made to measure from a particularly fine quality All-Wool Flannel in the correct Heraldic Blue, properly trimmed and finished with badge of registered design, obtainable only from George Court & Sons Ltd. With every blazer goes the Store’s full assurance of complete satisfaction. For Quality Men’s Wear at Lower Prices. GEORGE COURT & SONS LTD. KARANGAHAPE ROAD - - AUCKLAND SALTWATER SEAMEN SOAKED STUDENTS STAGE STORMY SHIPWRECK AT SEA A thrilling adventure befell three students of the Auckland University College on Tuesday last, when a small sailing boat was wrecked at sea. The heroes were Messrs. Fastier and Me - Cormack. Miss Hewitt played the feminine lead in an attractive manner. We tel! the story in Mr. F astier’s own vivid words: On the Tuesday night after lec- tures we decided to go down and look at the boat which we had just pur- chased. It was blowing a gale from the south-west, the weather was bitter- ly cold, occasional showers were com- ing acrcss and altogether it seemed a good night to go down to the sea in ships. Miss Hewitt came down to mend the sails by moonlight. When we got there it seemed a reasonable thing to sail the boat along the water- front. To our surprise we found, when we got outside the breakwater that there was a considerable sea run- ning. We can only venture to con- jecture that this was caused by the gale that was blowing. Crowding on all sail, we roared past the wharves, breaking all previous records for mid- winter sailing. When endeavouring to turn into Mechanics Bay we were again surprised to find that the off- shore wind tended to blow the boat away from the shore rather than to- wards it. Bailing like the devil, we passed Bean Rock to port and the Orakei Basin to starboard. A thing like that, said Mr. Fastier modestly, was no trouble to us. Photograph of Mr. Fastier rescuing Miss Hewitt. At this point it occurred to Mr. McCormack, who is an experienced yachtsman, to lower the centreboard, his idea being that it might assist us to sail into the wind. Unfortunately enthusiasm made him lower it^to its full extent and the pressure sprang a leak in the boat. This, continued Mr. Fastier, was a bad thing. Rangitoto now loomed up in the foreground and we made all haste to reach land. The wind helped us here considerably. By a stroke of bad luck we arrived at Rangitoto rather before we had meant to, and were left with a swim of half a mile from an outlying reef to the shore. Both Miss Hewitt and Mr. McCormack commented on the cold- ness of the water. Arriving on the oyster rocks we made all speed for habitation, and I would like to pay a tribute to the warmth of the hospi- tality of those people who looked after us. Friends and admirers will be (dis)pleased to hear that none of the three adventurers are any the worse for their experience.

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Page 1: CRACCUM - University of Auckland · Craccum extends its congratulations to Mr. Sullivan, acknowledges the long and ... with a resume of their qualifications and records. We wish students

W eather Report

CRACCUMA Cert. Adult Recommendation.

GRADUATIONand

ELECTIONEDITION

V ol. V. No. 9 AUCK LA N D U N IV ER SITY COLLEGE, A U G U ST 13th, 1931 P rice 3d.

THE ELECTION CAMPAIGN

SULLIVAN FOR PRESIDENT

C A N D ID A T E S FO R T H E E X E C U T IV E

P aterson, E dward B ennis: St. A n­drew’s College Prefect; House Committee 1931 ; Social Committee 1931 ; Grad. Ball Committee 1931 ; Musical Club Committee; Arts stu­dent.

The College is at present in the throes of the Annual Elections. The Presidential Election was held last Thursday and resulted in a substan­tial victory for Martin Sullivan. Sully is perhaps the youngest man to have become President of the Auckland University College, and as he is still an active student his personal touch with the mass of the students augurs well for the success of his period of office. Martin Sullivan’s record has already been more or less truthfully chronicled in a previous issue, so we shall forbear further eulogy. Craccum extends its congratulations to Mr. Sullivan, acknowledges the long and faithful service of his opponent, Mr. Robins, and the retiring President, Mr. Wilson, and prophecies a popular and profitable term for the new head.

A very keen contest for the W o­men’s Vice-Presidentship took place, and Craccum’s congratulations go to Miss Turner on attaining to the office for which her long period of student service has fitted her.T H E E X E C U T IV E ELEC TIO N

It has long been felt that the small­ness of College polls is in some mea­sure due to the lack of information the average student has about the majority of the candidates. We pub­lish therefore a list of the candidates with a resume of their qualifications and records. We wish students to understand, however, that we have no intention of electioneering, and that our notes are bare impartial reports.

* = Sitting Member./ ^Robins, E ugene Dumont: Auck­

land Grammar School; Junior Uni­versity Scholar; M.Sc. 1928; M.A. 1929; Senior Scholar; Sec. Tennis Club; S.C.M. Committee; Member Stud. Ass. Exec. 1*927-28-29-31; Secretary Stud. Ass. 1928-29; Occupation, High School Teacher.

Blow, E ric H arold: Auckland Grammar School; Deb. Soc. Com.1929- 31 ; Lit. Club Com. 1931 ; Social Com. 1931 ; Athletic Club Com. 1931 ; Stud. Ass. Exec. 1931 ; B.A. 1931 ; Teacher, Arts and Commerce Faculties; Editor Crac­cum 1931.

Hill, A lan R .: Auckland Gram­mar; Dep.-Capt. Harrier Club; Sec. Grad. Ball Committee 1931 ; Lit. Club Exec. 1929-30-31 ; Occupa­tion, Law Clerk.

I Mulgan, J ohn A .: AucklandGrammar Prefect; Junior Scholar; Editor Craccum 1930; Social Com­mittee 1930-31 ; Carnival Com­mittee 1931 ; Literary Club 1930- 31 ; Hon. Sec. Football Club 1931 ; Nominated Rhodes Scholar 1932; Full-time Arts student.

I Callis, Nancy E .: Epsom Girls’ Grammar Prefect; Lit. Club Exec.1930- 31 ; Deb. Society Committee 1931 ; Commerce Society 1930-31 ; College Hockey rep. 1930-31 ; Hockey Com. 1931 ; Commerce Student.

I i Archibald, Sheila B etty: Auck- b ' land Girls' Grammar Prefect; Sin­

clair Scholar 1927; Pres. S.C.M. 1930; House Committee 1929; Field Club Committee; Stud. Ass. Exec. 1931; B.A. 1931; Teacher, Arts faculty.

M A R TIN G LO U STER SULLIVA N , B.A.

Photo Courtesy “ Star”

Court, E velyn Rose: Auckland Girls’ Grammar Prefect; House Committee 1931 ; Hon. Sec. Basket­ball Club 1930-31 ; Social Com­mittee 1931 ; Stud. Ass. Exec. 1931 ; B.A. 1931 ; Arts student.

d’E sterre, Diana F rances: Auck­land Girls’ Grammar Prefect; Field Club Committee; Publications Com­mittee 1931; B.A. 1931; Arts Student.

Macky, R uth : Epsom Girls’ Gram­mar Prefect; Lit. Club Committee 1931; House Committee 1931; Arts student.

Milne, L ovelace: Dioscesan H .S .; House Committee 1931 ; Arts student.

Mulgan, Dorothea: Nelson Girls’ College Prefect; Lit. Club Com­mittee 1931 ; Hon. Sec. House Committee 1931 ; Arts student.

P aul, David B lackwood: Hamilton H .S. Prefect; Junior University Scholar; Lit. Club Committee 1928- 29-30-31 ; Publications Committee 1929-31; S.C.M. Committee 1930- 31; B.A. 1930; Hon. Sec. Carni­val Committee 1930; Law Clerk.

Monro, David H ector: Auckland Grammar; Lit. Club Committee 1929-30-31 ; Publications Com­mittee 1929-31; B.A. 1931; Carni­val Committee 1930; Arts student.

Colley, A nthony Donaldson: Downside College (Eng.) ; Hon. Treas. Hockey Club 1931 ; Vice- Pres. Hongi Club 1931 ; Science faculty.

Y ockney, Clive S. W .: Auckland Grammar; Junior Univ. Scholar; House Committee 1931; Senior Scholar; B.A. 1931 ; Arts student.

McCulloch, N. A. : Auckland Grammar; Hon. Sec. Rifle Club 1930-31 ; Engineering faculty.

W ilson, T homas: Auckland Gram­mar; Teacher, Arts faculty.

Barker, W illiam L.: Sacred Heart College; Hon. Sec. Deb. Society 1931; N.Z.U. Double Blue 1931

(hootball and Boxing) ; Arts student.

A dams, Geoffrey Ow en : Auckland Grammar; Junior Univ. Scholar; Deb. Soc. Committee 1931 ; B.A. 1931 ; Law Clerk.

D umble J ohn : Auckland Gram­mar school; B.Sc. 1927; Research Chemist; Author Varsity Play 1927; Arts student.

Martin, J ohn F rederick: Auck­land Grammar School; Engineering student.

E llison, Norman J oseph: Auck­land Grammar School; Hockey Blue 1930; Hockey Club Captain 1931 ; Chairman Hockey Social Committee 1931 ; College Hockey Rep. 1929-30-31; B.Sc. 1931; Bacteriologist. Science Faculty.

*Grey, R alph F. A .: Wellington College Prefect; Junior University Scholar; Stud. Ass. Exec. 1931 ; Chairman Social Committee 1931 ; Law Society Committee 1930-31 ; Law Clerk.

Harkness, E uan W .: Nelson Col­lege; Architectual Society; Archi­tecture student; Hongi Club; Arts and Engineering student.

R obertson, F red. H .: Mt. Albert Grammar Head Prefect; Arts stu­dent.

Cooper, W illiam H. : Auckland Grammar School; Junior Univer­sity Scholar; T.C. Exec.; Arts student.

UNIVERSITY BLAZERSUnder contract to the Auckland University College Students’ Association (Inc.) to supply University Blazers, the George Court Store gives the fullest possible value. Blazers are made to measure from a particularly fine quality All-Wool Flannel in the correct Heraldic Blue, properly trimmed and finished with badge of registered design, obtainable only from George Court & Sons Ltd. With every blazer goes the Store’s full assurance of complete satisfaction.

For Quality Men’s Wear at Lower Prices.

GEORGE COURT & SONS LTD.K A R A N G A H A PE R O A D - - A U C K LA N D

SALTWATER SEAMEN SOAKED

S T U D E N T S STA G E STO R M Y SH IPW R E C K A T SEA

A thrilling adventure befell three students of the Auckland University College on Tuesday last, when a small sailing boat was wrecked at sea. The heroes were Messrs. Fastier and Me - Cormack. Miss Hewitt played the feminine lead in an attractive manner. We tel! the story in Mr. F astier’s own vivid words:

On the Tuesday night after lec­tures we decided to go down and look at the boat which we had just pur­chased. It was blowing a gale from the south-west, the weather was bitter­ly cold, occasional showers were com­ing acrcss and altogether it seemed a good night to go down to the sea in ships. Miss Hewitt came down to mend the sails by moonlight. When we got there it seemed a reasonable thing to sail the boat along the water­front. To our surprise we found, when we got outside the breakwater that there was a considerable sea run­ning. We can only venture to con­jecture that this was caused by the gale that was blowing. Crowding on all sail, we roared past the wharves, breaking all previous records for mid­winter sailing. When endeavouring to turn into Mechanics Bay we were again surprised to find that the off­shore wind tended to blow the boat away from the shore rather than to­wards it. Bailing like the devil, we passed Bean Rock to port and the Orakei Basin to starboard. A thing like that, said Mr. Fastier modestly, was no trouble to us.

Photograph of Mr. Fastier rescuing Miss Hewitt.

At this point it occurred to Mr. McCormack, who is an experienced yachtsman, to lower the centreboard, his idea being that it might assist us to sail into the wind. Unfortunately enthusiasm made him lower it^to its full extent and the pressure sprang a leak in the boat. This, continued Mr. Fastier, was a bad thing. Rangitoto now loomed up in the foreground and we made all haste to reach land. The wind helped us here considerably. By a stroke of bad luck we arrived at Rangitoto rather before we had meant to, and were left with a swim of half a mile from an outlying reef to the shore. Both Miss Hewitt and Mr. McCormack commented on the cold­ness of the water. Arriving on the oyster rocks we made all speed for habitation, and I would like to pay a tribute to the warmth of the hospi­tality of those people who looked after us.

Friends and admirers will be (dis)pleased to hear that none of the three adventurers are any the worse for their experience.

Page 2: CRACCUM - University of Auckland · Craccum extends its congratulations to Mr. Sullivan, acknowledges the long and ... with a resume of their qualifications and records. We wish students

2 CRACCUM , TH U R SD A Y , A U G U ST 13th, 1931

CALLOUS CUNNING IN CAFETERIA

A SCANDALOUS STATE OF AFFAIRS

C R A C C U M PO IN T S O U T A F EW E Y E-O PE N E R S

Phone 44-271

UniversityCoaching

College22 F E R R Y B U IL D IN G ,

A U C K L A N DPERSONAL, TUITIO N: D ay c lasses for U n iversity E n ­trance, A ccou ntan ts’ P re lim ­inary, P .S .E . and T eachers’ E xam inations. E veningClasses in above subjects. C oaching for U n iversity E x ­am inations.TUITION BY C O R R E SPO N ­DEN CE for U n iversity Entrance and A ccou ntan ts’ Prelim inary.

D. W. FAGAN, m .a .,

Principal.(H onours in E nglish and

F rench)

Eat- -

WALNUTD airyB utter

Auckland9s Best

T E L E P H O N E 4 2 - 0 3 1

Box 1414, G.P.O., Auckland. Phone 42-350

The

Correspondence Coaching College

S M IT H ’S B U IL D IN G S , A L B E R T S T R E E T .

P rin c ip a l:T . U. W E L L S , M.A.

Coaching by Correspondence for:

Teachers’, University, Law, Accountancy, Training College Entrance, Surveyors’ Licence and A.M.I.C.E. Examinations.Very full Notes, Careful Cor­

rection of Work, Model Answers.

Craccum wishes to pay tribute to the work of Messrs. Morrison and Mit­chell of the Architecture Studio in connection with the decorations for the Graduation Ball.

CraccumUncorporating TKIlreccum

Unofficial Fortnightly of the Auckland University College.

A U G U S T 13th, 1931

GRADUATIONIt is now nine months since a hun­

dred and thirty odd students sat for the final section of their degrees, and the little “jollification” which they are about to indulge in is therefore not premature.

Time was when Capping Day was “the” day of the College and Civic year. To-day the graduates, because of the the sins of their predecessors have to put up with a dignified cere­mony, and the only really enjoyable thing will be the Capping Ball. This is bad for a Students’ Capping Carni­val and is as rational as a Church Harvest F estival. Let the squatter re­joice at the end of his wool season, the sailor at the end of his voyage, and let the student make whoopee at the end of his time of study.

Craccum extends heartiest congratu­lations to the graduates of the year and hopes that those who are leaving us for the big world will always re­tain pleasant memories of their student years. ------ ------------------ -

HARRIERS AND ATHLETICS

The Harrier Club scored its first outside success in the Onehunga- Auckland road race held recently. The ’Varsity team came second, 1 point only behind the winners. In the Auckland Inter-Club Champion­ship ’Varsity was also second. Both races were won by N. F. Cooper of the ’Varsity Club who, in the latter event, scored a decisive win over the British Empire Champion, J. W. Savidan. N. F. Cooper and A. B. Browne (the latter being 3rd in the above events) are virtual certainties for the Auckland Cross Country Team which will contest the Dominion Championship at Auckland on August 29, so, barring accidents, the club will have produced 2 out of a team of 6 reps, in its first season. Another promising runner who has improved tremendously during the season is R. C. Haszard who has become ’Varsity’s number three in teams races.

A determined effort is to be made next year to lose the Tournament Wooden Spoon, and the Athletic Club intends to hold a number of meetings after the football season to keep men in training and build up a team. Look out for posters advertising the annual meeting to be held shortly, when de­tails will be discussed.

W H A T A B O U T AN A R T IC L E FO R K IW I ?

CLOSING DATE SATURDAY

TO A P P E A R FIR ST W E E K N E X T T E R M

The average student has little or no I conception of the terrible cancer which is eating at the very entrails of our Cafeteria system. It is for Craccum to bring before the student public the realization of the iniquitous practices which are indulged in and openly boasted about in our University Dining Hall. Cracc um has long felt that un- i moral practices were openly indulged in in the Cafeteria, and had waited patiently for the day when Professor Belshaw or Bernard Wight would bring this festering sore to the light of common intentional day. But no, nothing has been done, and this shame­ful state has been allowed to continue blatantly and brazenly. Last week, however, a Craccum reporter got to work on the job and the results of his investigations are truly amazing, and will make every real man and maid in this College blush with shame and ' burn with indignation.

Is it known, we ask, that a definite organized underworld exists in our Common Rooms for the express pur­pose of scientifically sucking the life blood of the Cafeteria? No, it is not, and if it is, the knowledge is secretly suppressed, and discussion of the evil is as taboo as a paper on James Joyce at the E.S.F. Meeting.

This underworld is infested with gangs led by cunning and diabolical scoundrels. There is “Stew Face” A1 Grabonly whose gang is the terror of the waitresses of two continents. There is “Butter P at” Pete whose gang have the systematic stealing of butter down to a fine art, and there is “Slick” Silas Silvester who can remove sweets crosses from meal chits with photo­graphic accuracy and devilish cunning. The toll that these unscrupulous scoun­drels levy on the guineas of unsus­pecting students is stupendous.

These are a few of the practices that our reporter, at the peril of his life, discovered. A gang will quietly assemble by ones at a fixed table, and

directly their cursed company is com­plete will proceed to their nefarious trade. Half the number will obtain shilling chits and the other half will have pie and potato for 5d. With blatant nonchalance the coffee from the shilling will be passed on to the 5d. customers and the others will then return to the counter and bully the waitresses into believing that they have had no coffee, and consequently obtain another tankard. On leaving the Cafeteria the gang will square up, and thus every member of the band can thus obtain a substantial meal for about 7d. And this is allowed to go on in a modern civilized community, and the daily newspapers are as silent as the grave!

Then there is the pernicious pinch­ing of the Pat Pilfering Patrol whose object is to obtain the maximum num­ber of pats of butter at the minimum charge. The Machiavellian cunning of these human devils is infinite. They will stop at nothing, and even the thought of the pangs of indigestion cannot deter their craving. They will secrete butter on the bottom of their plates, behind their ears, up their sleeves, and pancake it between slices of bread. They are a dirty, greasy crew.

Lastly there is the Erasure Gang which specialises in removing sweets crosses from chits. The procedure is ridiculously simple. One of the gang will obtain pudding, consume it, hand it to the sinister leader Slick Silas who, with a deft flourish, removes the cross and hands it to another member of the gang, and the process is repeated ad lih ad nauseam. It is impossible to estimate the number of fiends who have fed fat free as the result of the handiwork of “Slick” Silas.

Craccum can do nothing. Like an economic law, it can just state facts and hope that the anger of the student public will be roused to such a pitch against these monstrosities in our midst that a public inquiry will be made.

COLLEGE HALL, FRIDAY, AUGUST 14

GRADUATION BALLT H E E V E N T OF T H E Y E A R

Dancing 8.30 p.m.— 2 a.m .------ Soup 2 a.m.Supper and Decorations on a Stupendous Scale. Double, 10/6. Single: Gents, 7 /6 ; Ladies 5/-.

(Gowns for first two dances)

“ Better Meats that cost you no more”

SID E L IG H T S ON T H E C R IC K ET T O U R

“England is certainly a great coun­try, and everything is wonderful ex­cept the cricket and the—weather. . . . Our pub is at present full of a million 100 per cent. Americans, and let me tell you that they speak exactly as our well-known film stars, only . ntbre so. j . . \Ve have seen- some;.pretty good shows, and they don’t mind what they say either » . . the English girls, you should see them! There is not a girl in New Zealand would stand a show over here!” (

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)

)

J

Page 3: CRACCUM - University of Auckland · Craccum extends its congratulations to Mr. Sullivan, acknowledges the long and ... with a resume of their qualifications and records. We wish students

CRACCUM , TH U R SD A Y , A U G U ST 13th, 1931 3

COMMENTS ON CAPPING’VARSITY’S GRATE DAY

The Annual Graduation Ceremony of this College will (or we hope it will) take place on Friday in the historic pit of the Auckland Town Hall. And the place is not ill chosen, for there have in days of yore gathered im­mense crowds to witness all conceiv­able forms of entertainment from cave­man wrestling to Hambourg recitals. We fear, however, that our ceremony will lack both the primitive passion of the crucifix or the Boston Crab, and the refined genius of Tsaioskvi’s Pre­lude in A flat minor. Nevertheless, we feel that a few comments on the line of procedure may not be out of place.

SIR G EO R G E FOW LDS(whose ancestors have fought the

English since Flodden.)P hoto Courtesy “ Star”

W H A T W ILL PR O B A B LY H A P P E N POSSIBLY

The ceremony is set down for 2.30 so that by ten to three everything should be ready for the kick off. This will be signallised by a loud crash on the minor stops of the organ, and the audience are expected to spring to their feet and sing Gaudeamus.

The President of the College Coun­cil, Sir George Fowlds, will then ad­dress the gathering in Gaelic. All copyrights are reserved and no English translations will be permitted during the ceremony. The audience is re­quested to clap discreetly at intervals. When he has concluded his oration (and if there is time left) the real business of the show will begin, andthe graduands will phial past him,have the toga virginibus chucked over their shapely shoulders, hear a Scotch incantation pronounced over their prostrate bodies and pass on graduates. The audience is requested to clap the first half dozen.

This will probably take some time. At last a new sub-title will flash on

the screen and Professor A n­derson, Chair­man of the Pro­fessorial Bored, will continue the foreign oration in the Heart of Midlothian dia­lect, which the newspapers will

, print in EnglishProfessor Anderton 0[] Saturdaymorning. The last speaker for thenegative, or whatever the show can be called, will be Mr. Nigel Wilson, President of the Students’ Association, who is expected to speak in bad Eng­lish on some subject strongly con- damnatory of the University of New Zealand.

The whole of the proceeding will be filmed under the personal super­vision and direction of Mr. M. R. O ’Shea, Registrar of the College, whose likeness is herewith reproduced. He will probably discard his pipe for the greater part of the ceremony, though this is by no means certain.

At the conclusion of the ceremony the Hongi Club will not perform, and the gathering will dispense, the gradu­ates to their afternoon tea and the audience to their husbands’ tea.

The following is a list of the Gradu­ands, neither in order of merit nor of notoriety:

" ~ in Absentia.M A STER OF A R T S

“Jack °f <*U trades and Master of Arts.”—Old A dage.

"A D D IS, Harold John (1st Lat. and Fr.)

A N D ER SO N , Keith D. (2nd Lat. and Fr.)

BO U LTO N , Edward "H A R T , Eslie Arnold (1st maths.) H O GG, John David (2nd Eng. and

Fr.)JO H N S T O N , Eileen Margaret

(2nd Educ.)KISSLING, Frances Edith Schwartz MINNS, Percy Croft M O N CRIEFF, Janet L.McGILL, Colin Thomas (2nd Lat.

and Fr.)"P E R R Y , Leslie W. G.

RA E, Kenneth William (2nd Lat. and Fr.)

"ROSS, Janet G.SALM ON, Herbert William

"STO N E, Percival Samuel Walter (2nd Lat. and Fr.)

TH O M PSO N , Henry Leopold W O O L C O T T , Alfred Douglas

WentworthPRICHARDS, Alun Morgan (1st

Educ.)

M A STER OF SCIENCE“I ’ve information, animal, Vegetable and mineral.”—“H.M .S. Pinafore.” LID G A RD , Louis Herbert LYONS, Robert Rodney

"SA GA R , Frederick Henry (2nd Phys.)

SH ER W O O D , Ian Russell (1st Chem.)

S TE W A R T , James Charles (1st Phys.)

"W A T T , John Stephen (2nd Chem.)

M A STER OF LAW S“ ‘Virtue in the middle,’ said the Devil as he sealed himself between two

lawyers.”— A non.BLACK, James Corbett (2nd) ED GE, William Reed (2nd) M cCARTHY, Frederic (2nd) O ’D EA, Richard John (1st) TH O M SO N , Trevor G. M A C A R T H U R , Ian Hannay

B A C H ELO R OF A R T S“Ten thousand saw I at a glance.”

— W ordsworth. ADAM S, Geoffrey Owen A LLEN ,. John W.A RC H IBA LD , Sheila Betty

"B ELSH A W , James P. "BLACKLOCK, Ethelwin

BLOW , Eric Harold "BUNBY, Isabel D.

BYRNES, Malcolm Palmer C A LV ER T, Cyril .G CARSON, Elsie F.CLELA ND , Doris G. CO STELLO , Desmond Patrick CO U R T, Evelyn Rose D A VIES, Frederick R. J. D ’E STER R E, Diana Frances EDSON, Eileen D.

"G O RD O N , Graham N. "H A L L IG A N , Florence M. "H A R V E Y , Kathleen M."H A T T A W A Y , Frederick G.

H E W L E T T , Theophilus Norris H U TC H IN SO N , Audrey JESSO P, Ailsa M.LEO N A RD , Kathleen M.

; LYONS, Edward M A CLA U RIN , Griffith Campbell

"M A C LA U R IN , Kenneth Campbell

M EIK LEJO H N , Lionel C. M ONRO, David Hector

"M OR RISO N , Charles F. "M cDOUGALL, John Ned "P A Y N E , Mavis Gray

P O O LE, John Tancred PREBB LE, A. E.RO B ER TO N , Lesley SM ITH , Cyril W.SM ITH , Lincoln R. J. S TE W A R T , Dorothy SULLIVAN, Martin Gloster TA Y LO R , Henry Gordon

"T R EA C H E R , Kenneth N. U T TIN G , Gordon Noel W ALL, James J.

"W A TSO N , John W A TSO N , Mary Evelyn Olive W EBB, Edward Norman W H Y T E , Nancy W. W ILLIAM SON, Leslie A. D. Y O CKNEY, Clive Samuel White-

B A C H ELO R OF SCIENCE“Nourishing a youth sublime With the fairy tales of Science and the

long results of time.”— TENNYSON. ADAM S, Albert G.A N D ER SO N , Alfred R. A SH C R O FT, Edith B.BR EW IN, Beryl Iris.

"CO NN O LLY, Jack ELLISON, Norman J.G RA Y , Donald A.

"G U Y , George H EY W A R D , Charles W. P O Y N T O N , Charles W . (C.U.C.) M ALOY, Cyril L.M A RK H A M , Geoffrey W . M U RR AY , John T.N O R T H , Wm. C. R.O W EN , R. J.PA R K , Ivy O. A.P L A T T S , Wm. M.PR Y O R , Charles G.

"R U D A L L , Kenneth Maclaurin

B A C H ELO R OF COM M ERCE“M y ducats, O, my ducats.”

— “Merchant of Venice.” B A T T L E Y , Cecil H.H A R R O P , Reginald S.JONES, Hugh A.ROBINSON, Douglas L.

B A C H ELO R OF LAW S“If the laws could speak f° r themselves they would complain of the lawyers

in the first place.”—Halifax. BRODIE, Eric BURNS, Alan H.CH O U LES, Roy L. D A V E N PO R T , Howard S. EM M A N UEL, Henry K. G ER R A R D , Thomas D.G REEN, Morris C.H A M ILTO N , John G.JENCEN, Peter LUSK, John K.SC H N A U ER , Lawrence B. SM Y TH EM A N , Harold F. SPEN CE, Wm. S.

"T A T T E R S F IE L D , James N. TA Y L O R , Frederick W. M cGUIRE, James Duncan REA D , Stanley Charles

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Page 4: CRACCUM - University of Auckland · Craccum extends its congratulations to Mr. Sullivan, acknowledges the long and ... with a resume of their qualifications and records. We wish students

4 CRACCUM, TH U R SD A Y , A U G U ST 13th, 1931

THE CAPPING CEREMONY

A FEW RANDOM THOUGHTS

This article is addressed for the most part to the poor fish who are unlucky enough to have obtained ring­side seats at the annual capping cere­mony and are about to see Sir George put a crucifix on the idea of a Fine Arts Building. Our advice to you is to read this through and then slip quietly out, but we don’t suppose for a moment that you will take it. Tradition dies so hard. In the old days funny things happened at capping ceremonies and so to-day the die-hards are here hoping against hope that they will get a laugh. Anyone with a subtle enough sense of hum,our will find plenty to amuse him during the next hour or two. Your true humorist would go into hysterics when the solemnly beautiful procession enters, would collapse under the seat hearing Sir George, and be carried out still laughing during Professor Anderson’s address. But if you want broad humour, if you are low enough to laugh at interjections, to be amused by student burlesques, to wish to see a pork pie thrown at the registrar, read this through and then slip quietly out —for none of these things are going to happen to-day. No one will blow a motor-horn; no strident heckler’s voice will echo through the hall; the Hongi Club will not he there, either as school girls or in a third rate musical comedy. So just slip quietly out and drop a tear (silently—in case the registrar is watching you) for the happy, happy days that are no more.

Old-timers will tell you of the years when there were processions; they will perhaps tell you about the year when there was no capping and the students made whoopee in the Town Hall for one glorious night under the leadership

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of Jasper Calder (and may he remain for ever young). Coming nearer our own days the score-board reads like this:1929— Violent address by student

President—Atmore coming—stud­ents begged to keep quiet. Result dead silence unaffected by non­arrival of Atmore. Hongis very kindly dress as school-girls.

1930— Church service with music and responses. Students kindly given use of platform after ceremony. No interjections by special request. Flat show by Hongis to a dormant audience who walk out on them.

ROCKE W H O R U LES T H E R O O ST

(including the Council, the Stud. Ass., ■ ' and Training College.)

P h o to Courtesy “ Star”

1931— A forecast: Enter staff and registrar’s friends shortly after 2.30 p.m., looking and feeling impressive, to the tune of Gaudeamus (let us rejoice) played dead slow; speeches in Middle Scots by Sir George and the Chairman. Speech in New Zea­land dialect on the examination system by J. N. Wilson. Afternoon tea at the College afterwards—all visitors welcome. No Hongis or other students present.

1932— A further forecast — material supplied by the Registrar.

Capping Ceremony 8-9.30 p.m. Governor General present. Army and Navy present. All Auckland’s titled nobility present. All Auck­land’s monied aristocracy present. Graduates and students also allowed to be present by kind permission of Professorial Board. Ceremony fol­lowed by Graduation Ball. Big

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G RA D U A TIO NTHERE M UST BE A RECORD OF THIS IMPORTANT EVENT—

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social event of the year. Big night for staff. Bigger night for Regis­trar. Students catch a little cf the reflected glory, and perhaps go off to a grill-room and have a party of their own.Of course it doesn’t do to take these

things seriously. It remains to be seen if keeping really quiet will do the cause any good. Most students will agree that the Capping Ceremony should be a solemn business and should be left alone. Then, why not a pro­cession ? Why not a carnival week with play, procession, ceremony and ball? But, bless you, my child, the students aren’t the main part of this College—they only exist as a reason for paying salaries to the staff.

CAPPING CEREMONY!T O W N H A LL,

FR ID A Y , A U G U S T 14th, 2.30 p.m.

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LA PSES IN LA TIN

Extract: Sequitur nefas! Aegyptia coniunx.

Trans: And her Egyptian husband followed her, the scoundrel!

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