MICHAEL KOHL

The diary of a Belkan soldier in the Belkan War

Confession of a Soldier

Format: Single Page PDF Version R1A1-2-12-2015Translator: yellow26Original Interpretation: Ayre, MenAce, Ribbon-Blue2015 Interperetation: Cerberus, Ribbon-BlueSpecial Thanks: T.J. Millie ArcherAssembly: Ribbon-Blue

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CONTENTSPage 03. Foreword

Page 06. Entry #1 - April 13th, 1995

Page 09. Entry #2 - April 15th, 1995

Page 11. Entry #3 - April 27th, 1995

Page 13. Entry #4 - May 14th, 1995

Page 15. Entry #5 - May 18th, 1995

Page 17. Entry #6 - May 22nd, 1995

Page 19. Entry #7 - May 30th, 1995

Page 22. Entry #8 - June 19th, 1995

03.

FOREWORDConfession of a Soldier was released as promotional material by Proj-ect Aces for Ace Combat Zero: The Belkan War. It follows a Belkan soldier as he and his unit participated in the Belkan War of 1995. Its a unique point of view which shows an array of emotion, the human side of the Belkan war effort and introduces some interesting rumors con-cerning the conflict.

The initial translation of the materials for this series was done between August 2007 and February 2008. An Electrosphere (ES) member named yellow26 worked with the staff of ES 1.0 to better interpret his transla-tion into something that sounded natural in English. As the community and website changed forums and moved away from1.0, the first part had disappeared during the information transfer. Copies and slightly edited interpretations of entries two through eight have circulated over the years, but part one remained lost.

The two lead administrators of Electrosphere revisited ES 1.0, enjoying a trip down memory lane by viewing topics from many years ago, only to stumble upon part one of this series. Somehow, someway it was placed into the Recycle Bin the community has always tried to minimize dele-tion of threads for the sake of archiving. It was found in the middle of 970 archived discussion threads and unneeded information articles.

A rush to complete the series was made. The original translation texts were used to create this ebook and present this series in a more desirable format. .PDF, .SWF and web page versions of it will also be made avail-able on Electrosphere.info. The more choices the better. Small edits and some rewording have been performed to smooth out the rougher trans-lation spots, but the content is unchanged.

04.

A picture from Hardcover: Untitled Photographs was added to the 8th entry, which is not used in the official release of this series. This image was added to give readers a better idea of what Michael Kohl was ad-dressing in that entry of his journal; it has been identified in the book. All other pictures come from the original work featured on ACES WEB and have been given relevant captions.

We hope you enjoy Confession of a Soldier presented in completion for the first time since April 2008.

STORY

06.

April 13th, 1995 - Weather: Fair

Five days have passed since we arrived on the battlefield. I never made it a habit to write in a diary, but five months have passed since I started to keep this diary after I joined the armed forces. After some hard training, Ive finally arrived on the battlefield! Its a wonderful feeling to devote oneself to defending the homeland and fighting for peace!

Its April, but the mornings are still cold in this border region neverthe-less. The general roll call was made at 6:00 AM as usual. The air was cold, but the sky was serene. I was assigned to the the Belkan Armys 8th Ar-mored Division, 3rd Infantry Unit Tollwut Hund (Rabid Dog). We are tasked with both offensive and defensive roles.

The Tollwut Hund unit is comprised of the most brave and competent men in the Belkan forces. Out of all of them, Captain Erhardt was the most fearsome. He led a midnight raid on a Ustian tank battalion with a three man Panzerfaust platoon. Normally the Captain is a calm person;

Captain Erhardt telling a story.

// ENTRY 01

Scenery during dinner.

07.

speaking in a soft tone, often telling me about his infant son he left back home. The Captains eyes look warm and gentle whenever he talks about his son. However, when he is in the field, his eyes turn into a those of a tiger stalking its prey. It almost seems like the gleam in his eyes could pierce a steel plate. Nobody is willing to speak to him when his eyes are filled with rage.

Back on topic. As usual I had dinner near our tents with my companions, surrounding the fire with them. Tonights main course was grilled chick-en and boiled potatoes. They were rations of course. These rations gave

08.

me a bit of a hard time at first, but its undeniable that you enjoy them once you get used to the taste. Does this mean that I am one step closer to becoming a true soldier?

There are more than ten items in these rations; the main course, coffee, tobacco, caramels for dessert, and much more. Having a full-course din-ner right in the middle of the battlefield relieves the fatigue and tension of the day.

Sitting around the fire and having dinner with my comrades under the star-studded sky reminds me of going camping when I was a kid; it sort of made me miss my childhood. Its still cold outside at night. Itll be time to sleep in about thirty minutes. Our unit is heading to Route 171 in Southern Belka to reinforce our defensive positions there.

09.

April 15, 1995 - Weather: Sunny

When we got near our destination, Route 171, my eyes were stunned by the black smoke that was rising. The smell of gasoline and the fragrance of gunpowder enveloped the rural area. The smell of the battlefield is more appetizing than my moms cooking, the sniper, Cowboy mur-mured, caressing his G3 with his tobacco-tarred fingers.

Several hours before we got to the destination, an Ustian air squadron launched an attack on the Belkan forces along Route 171 and inflicted serious damage to the forces stationed there. Being unable to get close to our destination, Sector D27, we are currently hiding in a woods 50 km away from there. When we got here, there were young soldiers who re-treated from the front line, soldiers who were on their way there as rein-forcements just like us. Soldiers being carried into first aid tents, screams, unanswered radio calls... Intense images were blending together in rapid succession. At the sight of those unfamiliar scenes, I became nauseated, was caught in vertigo and went white-out blind. Then I found myself squatting on the ground.

The face of the commander of the platoon that retreated from the front line was covered in soot. The only thing that was clear was the raging fury in his eyes, like the moon shining red in the night sky. He grasped my neck while I was still squatting and scolded me for not performing any medical treatment for the wounded soldiers. Though inexperienced, I managed to bandage them up, send those on stretchers to the helicop-ters, give water to those lying on camp beds. We finally completed the setup of the campsite at dusk. Im totally exhausted now. Blisters are all over my hands because I was shoveling a trench for as long as 3 hours. My throat is sore and stiff because of the soot. And then before I knew it, my appetite was gone. I thought I wanted to be alone tonight.

To avoid getting assaulted again by Ustian forces, the use of light and fire is restricted. While lying on my camp bed and having a cup of coffee,

// ENTRY 02

10.At Route 171.

Franz from the same unit came in with chocolates. Franz, who cut his hair Mohawk style before heading to Route 171, threw a pity party and wistfully talked about how angry he was at Ustio, how to get his revenge, and made me laugh, as always, at the end of the talk with his sense of humor. Just dont get too shocked. Learn to accept the situation as it is, Captain Erhardt tapped me on the shoulder in the regular meeting and said, a powerful unit has already been formed to take back Route 171 and is on its way to the front line. I can sense a surge of anger and hatred against Ustio rising up inside me.

Those people who kiss a superpowers ass to secure their benefits, act arrogantly in international society and pose a threat to their neighboring countries. Those people who resist the time of revolution. Those people who are responsible for the deaths of our compatriots. Those bastards will never be forgiven.

The sound of recon jets from Ustio that occasionally pass by overhead boost my irritation and anger even more. Ustio must lose.

11.

April 27th, 1995 - Weather: Fair

Im wondering where to start. Or rather, I cant even remember in detail what happened in the past few days. Did my ear drums burst? It feels like I cant hear things well.

On April 24th, 1995, I was posted to the Futuro Canal in southern Belka and experienced battle for the first time. When the order was issued to cancel the operation to take back Route 171, we immediately moved to a naval port within the Futuro Canal.

I guess that was in the afternoon. A terrible alarm suddenly went off in the port. At that time, I was taking a break on a quay along the port, aimlessly gazing at the waves coming and going. I was in a world differ-ent from a battlefield, peacefully poised between reality and fantasy. That moment was shattered in an instant by the sound of the alarm. Fear and tension thundered through my body, a feeling I had felt for the first time since I was born. The facility was enveloped by a bustling atmosphere and all hands immediately moved into combat positions. A moment of silence ensued.

That silence was broken by deafening roars of jets, machine guns and successive explosions that almost matched the timing of those attacks. From this point forward my memory is blurred. Colors of blood and fire, columns of black smoke, Rosenberg who kept firing a heavy machine gun at random while frightened, empty gazes from dead soldiers, im-pacts, explosions, water sprays, shouts, roars, cuss words...

I was running around with a 10 millimeter amidst that storm... I guess. Bullets had just skimmed over my helmet and I was almost minced by gunfire from an enemy fighter aircraft. It would be a white lie if I said that I had no fear, but I still wanted to swat down that Ustian fighter with a heavy machine gun. I was unspeakably hyped up. I dont remember how long the battle continued. Before I knew it, those deafening jet

// ENTRY 03

Futuro Canal.

12.

sounds disappeared and groans and screams echoed in the facility.

When I was standing at a loss, an enemy fighter with its one wing paint-ed in red soared overhead in a carefree manner, as if to scoff at us.

Im alive. Several days before this battle, a large scale air battle reportedly took place near the border. It was only two enemy planes that invaded B7R and they went head to head with our ace squadron. They were knocked out by our aces and rushed back to base. Thats what I heard.

Theres no telling when the facilities can be reconstructed. Theres no telling when the enemy launches the next surprise attack either. Im not informed of what kind of mission we are going to be engaged in, nor if we will remain in this place. The only thing Im certain of is that Im on the battlefield.

13.

May 14th, 1995 - Weather: Fair

The coalition forces of Ustio and Osea began the invasion into Belka. In response to the preceding battle, our forces stationed in the Futuro Canal dispersed. Our Tollwut Hund unit left the naval port and is now hiding along the river. The weapons we gathered while retreating are two .50 caliber heavy machine guns, one 40mm grenade launcher, one small armored vehicle, several RPGs, and standard combat equipment for each of us. To be honest, these are far from something we can rely on.

The enemy has now taken the canal and they intend to send troops and combat vehicles by ship, in an initiative to avalanche into Belka with numbers and mobility. Should they invade our country... Im worried about my mom in my hometown. We frequently move from one place to another due to changes in operations, so I cant even receive letters.

The members of the Tollwut Hund unit are Captain Erhardt, Captains assistant Sergeant Mayer, Corporal Piper known as The Smile, Corporal Berger, former pro soccer player, Private Schneider The Sniper, Private Rosenberg whose parents run a womens underwear shop, Private Franz who is my age, and me Private Kohl. That is 8 men altogether.

We left Futuro and are hiding in the desert. There have been no official orders from HQ since we retreated and we are stuck in the sand. Franz is in contact with HQ by radio, but it seems like people higher up have not decided what to do next because of the unexpected defeat at Futuro. Hide along the river for the time being and engage the allied forces go-ing up river. What? Are the upper echelons joking? If we attack hostile military vessels with weapons like these, fighters will quickly take off from the aircraft carrier and then were gonna be toast right on the spot. There is no need to follow ridiculous orders Captain Erhardt said, and prohibited us from any act of firing. In a hilly area in the desert, we found a cave suitable to hide in temporarily.

// ENTRY 04

Tollwut Hund desert camp.

14.

We are surveying the landings of the allied forces from this location and are reporting them to HQ from time to time.

Anyway, we have to get out of this place soon. There arent enough weap-ons and there isnt enough food. The number of the enemies going up the river is increasing day by day. Im wondering why HQ doesnt send air squadrons here. If only we could launch all-out attacks again...

Im watching the enemy through a telescope today, holding back my wish to fire at them yet again.

May 18th, 1995 - Weather: Rain

On the battlefield, waking up at the sound of the rotors of an approach-ing Pavehawk is a daily routine, as natural as seasoning a sunny side up egg with salt at breakfast. I was never as happy on this battlefield than when I saw that low flying black silhouette approaching us. A long time had passed since we asked for rescue by radio. Even I thought HQ had abandoned us.

The last thing I wanted to do was die of hunger and I had even started to think it was meaningless coming to this battlefield. The helicopter crew who came to our rescue got the job done so quickly that I thought I saw how true professionals take care of business. The longer the helicopter hovers in the air, the easier it can take hits from the enemy. The helicop-ter needs to hover in the air as long as the rescue operation is carried out. If it is targeted in this moment by, say, a SAM, its doomed. Game over.

Inside the aircraft one of the rescue team members gave each of us a chocolate bar. It was something I liked very much as a kid and was sweet enough to make me fully realize that I was still alive. We arrived at a rear base at midnight.

Wrapped in incomparable joy all of us hugged each other on the runway, except Captain Erhardt. His face remained grave and he had a small talk with a superior waiting for his arrival.

Now I can finally sleep with peace of mind. Take a shower, eat my fill of roast beef, drink a gallon of milk and when I wake up in the next morn-ing, I can write my mom a letter. Thats what I was thinking. We were waiting for the superior to finish talking with Captain Erhardt on the runway. Looking at his face as he was walking back to us, I had a bad feeling about it. Actually, I already had it inside the Pavehawk.

15.

// ENTRY 05

He said, about 5 hours from now at 0600, we Tollwut Hund unit mem-bers are on our way to Tauberg in order to participate in Operation Brandfleck proposed by HQ. We are going to fly to target destination by helicopter. Upon arrival we will meet up with the 8th Armed Division of the Belkan Army. Your rendezvous point is the D-2 heliport at 0530, 30 minutes before the start of the operation. Each one of you is allowed free action until 0530. Regarding the facilities in Doris Air Base, an explana-tion will be...

Right after I came to the battlefield I believed what would emerge after the war was our victory. But now, Ive come to think otherwise. I dont want my war to end with my death. Thats the only thing I have in mind now. Theres no way I talk to my comrades about such a thing, but I guess they are thinking same deep down inside. I want to make it back alive. I just want to make it back alive. Thats the feeling we have in common and the only motivation for us to be here on this battlefield.

Pavehawk on the rear bases runway.

16.

17.

May 22nd, 1995 - Weather: Rain

Tauberg.

My dad often drove me here for deer hunting when I was a kid. We used to get into the forest at sunrise, bated our breaths and kept walking. We just kept on walking silently on the leeward to elude the deers keen sense of smell and hearing.

It was when I was 10 years old that I pulled the trigger of a rifle for the first time.

The taste of the hot chocolate I drank sitting on an old fallen tree with my dad was excellent. When military base construction was undertaken in Tauberg, my dad actively partook in the anti-base construction cam-paign. Here my dad and I learned how to coexist with nature, how to overcome it and how to conquer it. More than 10 years have passed since then and Im back here in Tauberg once again. My dad is not by my side this time and my target through the telescope is not a wild animal. We moved to Excalibur by helicopter. The advanced equipment of this facil-ity is simply amazing.

Its night. I can hear howls of wolves from beyond the wire fences. The figure of Excalibur, a tower that stands tall as if to reach the sky, is sort of anomalous in this place. The objective of Operation Brandfleck seems to be to lure enemy forces into Excaliburs range and annihilate them by making the best use of chemical laser weaponry. Im ready. Ive had my share of shooting experiences here since I was 10. All we have to do now is wait for the enemy to enter the net.

// ENTRY 06

A photo of the mostly completed Excalibur in Tauberg, Belka.(Hard Cover Magazine: Untitled Photo Selection, Claus Bauer, July 18th, 1994)

18.

19.

May 30th, 1995 - Weather: Cloudy

A trap is the oldest device for hunting and is useful because it can cap-ture game with less effort than using other tactics. Traps are efficient and are still used to exterminate rats, cockroaches, and other vermin today.

On May 23rd, Operation Brandfleck was carried out under the direct command of HQ. The main objective of this operation was to lure an enemy mercenary unit called Galm Team into the range of Excalibur and take them all out at once with its laser beams. That mercenary unit seemed to be very skilled.

There was a rumor going around everywhere that a mercenary flight unit of the allied forces was unstoppable and HQ had started to think seri-ously about wiping them out. It was after Excalibur fell that I knew that the plane with a red wing I saw at Futuro belonged to the team every-body had been talking about. The Sword of Tauberg was destroyed by the wingman of the single red wing plane. It was miserably broken right in half with a deafening roar.

The scene of the fall of Excalibur was exactly like a nightmare. Having penetrated the laser defense network, Galm Team entered the airspace right above the base and scattered every missile they carried over Tau-berg. I was ordered to operate Corporal Bergers self-propelled AA artil-lery and joined battle against the enemy from inside the forest nearby. A few hours after the start of the operation, enemy air squadrons showed up. The Corporal opened fire right away. He was so hyped up that he kept cussing while shooting.

Several minutes into combat a small AGM hit the ground 70 feet away from my self-propelled artillery. It didnt look like Corporal Berger no-ticed it. VT fuse! I shouted out, leaped off from the vehicle and then shielded myself with the caterpillar treads. He was still firing at the sky while I braced myself. I had never experienced such an awful explosion.

// ENTRY 07

Approaching the destroyed Excalibur base.

20.

Trees shuddered, the AA artillery jumped several inches up into the air and the gruesome blast from the explosion ripped at my cheeks and ears.

Thats as far as I can remember.

After I came to, it took me some time to understand whether I was alive or dead. After I guessed that I was still alive, it took me even more time to think that I had to do something. In order to simply get on my feet I prepared my whole body, gave my arms an order to move, gave my legs an order to bend, closed my eyes and my body slowly started to make motions. I was in the silence of the forest as I sensed an enormous amount of time passing by.

It was almost dusk in Tauberg when the corpse of Corporal Berger was found. The parts of what used to be Corporal Berger were scattered everywhere several hours ago. It was impossible for us to find them all. I started to walk to the center of the base, dragging my leg stabbed by a piece of metal. When I managed to limp back there, there were nothing

21.

but bodies of dead soldiers, heaps of rubble, a few medics, and the smell of gasoline. There was nothing beautiful at all. Are you alright?, a medic said to me. But I ignored him and walked on. Then I noticed a tattoo of a bold skeleton crushing the peace symbol in its hand on the arm of a soldier on a stretcher. I lifted the cover sheet and saw a severely damaged corpse. It was Rosenberg.

I received a blanket from a medic and sat on some rubble. Then came a bald-headed man. An Officer? He seemed to have come here from a rear area to confirm the situation. When he passed by me I saw a slight smile on his ugly face. He was terribly vivid, seeing those soldiers who luckily survived, giving them a slap on the back and saying words of encourage-ment which were just as useless as shit. He must be one of those who risk others lives to avoid coming to the front line. Or rather, he is one of those clever asses who have the ability and method to keep away from a bad place at a bad time. I recognized him as such on the spot.

Its obvious that this country wouldnt stop fighting this war. Learn to accept the situation as such is to know how to eliminate a humans in-nate emotions and live for lies, deception, and selfishness, isnt it? I just cant devote my life to honor and pride in a situation where my friends die and my parents are in danger. Its because I have already lost faith in this war.

22.

June 19, 1995

War is hatched from the egg of patriotism. Every comrade I met and parted with on the battlefield loved Belka. Devote everything for the sake of our country. Slogans of that kind were everywhere in town be-fore the war started.

We, those who were born in Belka, have been mature patriots since the moment we were beought into this world. We were enthused about a politicians speech when were children and we formed lines early in the morning when there was a military parade. We never failed to give thanks when we surrounded the table to have a homely meal every day. We kissed the national flower many times when snow melted away and spring came. I had never thought about the reason why I loved my homeland. My dad, dads dad, and even his dad loved this country of Belka and took strong pride in doing so. A country that had a different thought than Belka had, was Belkas foe and that foe was destined to per-ish. No matter how prejudiced it might sound, this was what the majority of people believed.

I, too, had loved Belkan soil, trees and water and taken pride in all of them since I was a kid. I was certain this country was the pivot of the world and everything else. And so, demons of nuclear weaponry quietly landed on the homeland of Belka I had held affection for.

The discord between the military authorities and politicians is unques-tionable. Actually, confusion and divisiveness are growing rapidly inside the military. Those who try to continue the war, those who try to quickly make up for the loss in postwar settlement, those who throw down weapons and escape, those who live for self-interest. Anarchy prevails on the battlefield and in the country. Rumors are spreading that it was our compatriots who pressed the buttons which caused the nuclear detona-tions. Why?

// ENTRY 08

23.

Its said that multiple nuclear explosions took place simultaneously. I had heard that the military had been developing small nuclear bombs called Radioactive Detonators for years. It seems the Radioactive Detonator is, although extremely powerful, very small and looks like an ordinary grenade. It can adjust the blast radius by 100 yard units. The detonation sequence is to pull the slide trigger atop the detonator.

This is the kind of weapon that attracts evil.

Amidst the mixture of rumors and truths, I still cannot get in contact with my mom. No matter how hard those stupid civilian employees of the military try to continue the war and even if there are bastards and politicians who profit from it, this war will end. It was decided. Belka was defeated. I no longer have hope and respect for this country and politi-cians. Not that I hate this country, but Ive noticed that a country is, after all, an inorganic entity. History, tradition, what I couldnt see due to the restraints caused by the biased politics, or rather, what I had not tried to see.

Now that Ive seen life and death closely, something, though very blurred, has started to become visible. Totalitarianism sometimes brings about fear. I see the pride and truth in me being Michael Kohl and would like to end this war of mine.

The ceasefire negotiations with the allied forces and Belkas disarmament have started. The war has virtually ended and the troops are gradually becoming cheerful. Although there are those who sneak around to re-cruit young soldiers into guerrilla forces, nobody is listening to them anymore. A few days ago, Kurzlinger, an old soldier, caused a fight. It seems like he pushed his luck a little too far to recruit his man. He is said to have pointed a gun to the forehead of the young soldier while recruiting him. Just before Kurtzlinger pulled the trigger, several soldiers stopped him and the situation was settled. Kurtzlinger was a violent man and his men hated him. In fact, many people hated him. The next morn-

A roadsign in the Principality of Belka.

24.

ing the corpse of Kurtzlinger was found tied to a drum can only with un-derwear on. Nobody was surprised at the sight of it. In the end, his body was buried in the woods by some gentle soldiers. There used to be order and formalities here, but not now.

The war is over and everyone is equal in citizenship. There are some people who pay back a slap to the face on the battlefield with interest, with bullets, after coming back home alive. Hatred is a flame that burns permanently inside those who have it within them. Try not to stand out on the battlefield as much as possible and lurk with bated breath. This statement may sound stupid, but I will remember this someday when bullets begin to fall.

25.

- Michael Kohl

The order was issued that the remnant forces should immediately sur-render to the allied forces. A bit too simple an order, but considering the situation there is nothing to wonder about. Everything will be finally over. Im trying not to think of my mom and Captain Erhardt who has been incommunicado. I dont give a damn what the allied forces admin-istration will be like. I cant imagine that it could be worse than it is now. It will take the allied forces some time to settle things down when we ar-rive at Anfang and surrender. But itll be just a little while. After all, they are humans too. Theres no way they would abuse us.

I made it through alive and the war is over.

Anfang.

Ive never been there, but it will be a place I will never forget for the rest of my life.