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Dave Crisp

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Plan for the Day - Fri 25th April

• Approximate timings for the day:– 9.30 Session 1– 11.00 to 11.15 Break– 11.15 Session 2– 12.45 to 1.30 Lunch– 1.30 Session 3– 3.00 to 3.15 Break– 3.15 Session 4– 4.45 Finish

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We Will Covers Elements of:

• What is Mentoring• Benefits of Mentoring• Starting a Mentoring

Relationship• Ongoing Mentoring Relationship• Ending a Mentoring Relationship

Cover as much as we can in a day

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Outcomes

• Provide an opportunity to get to know each other & so

• An opportunity to try out a Mentoring Relationship with a number of people

• Promote atmosphere of Exploration & Discovery

• Resolve any concerns you have about Mentoring

• Examine some of the basics of being a mentor/mentee

• Provide knowledge you require about process• Provide opportunity to plan your

development

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Introductions

• Name• Organisation• Anything you would like everyone

to know

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Exercise - Getting to know each other

• Discuss in two’s [15 minutes each] (or three’s have 10 mins each)

Pick person known least well Discover what they want to get out of

being a Mentor and/or Mentee What are the main concerns? Any specific outcomes for the day

Include time to make notes using forms

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What is Mentoring?

• ‘Mentoring is ‘off-line’ help by one person to another in making significant transitions in knowledge, work or thinking.’

European Mentoring Centre

• ‘Mentoring helps and supports people to manage their own learning in order to maximise their potential, develop their skills, improve their performance and become the person they want to be.’

Eric Parslow (1992)

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Exercise - What is Mentoring for You?

• Discuss in two’s [15 minutes each] (or three’s have 10 mins each)

Pick another person not known well– Exploring each others Understanding

of Mentoring

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The Principles of Mentoring

The mentoring process is based on the following principles:

• Building a trust relationship with the mentee• Supporting the developmental needs of the

mentee• Developing the performance competence of the

mentee• Providing the person with an environment

conducive to change• In addition if in the same organisation:

– Integrating the person in the organisation and its culture– Socialisation of the mentee within the group

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Starting a Mentoring Relationship

What needs to be in place?

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Foundations of Mentoring

MENTORING

SHAR

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LUES

MUTU

ALRE

SPEC

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MUTU

ALTR

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EFFE

CTIV

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Values

• Represent deeply held beliefs and are demonstrated through day-to-day behaviours.

• Shared values make a proclamation about how you expects each other to behave.

• Values endure over the long-term and provide a constant source of strength.

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Some Examples of Values

• Openness – Sharing information• Passion – Enthusiasm for the work• Integrity – Say what we do/Do what we

say• Excellence – Recognise jobs well done• Fun – Work hard/Play hard• Improvement – Continuous review• Team-work – Support each other• Timeliness – Deliver against promises• People Centred – Recognise individual

needs and aspirations• Diversity – Difference enriches

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Exercise - Determining Values

• Discuss in two’s [15 minutes each] (or three’s have 10 mins each)

Pick another person not known well Discover each others values for working

together• Can use these questions:

– What is most important to you? – What is important about having a Mentoring

process? – How motivated are you when you work

within your top values? – How de-motivated are you when not

working authentically within your values?

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Respect and Trust

• See EMCC code of ethics handout– Pages 2-4

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Effective Communication

• Attitudes (for excellent communication)

• Active Listening• Open Questions • 80:20 rule • Consideration of Learning Styles• Giving Feedback

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Attitudes of the Excellent Communicator• Everyone has the resources they need or can acquire

them. • People make the best choice they can at the time.

• All behaviour has a positive intention• Human behaviour is purposeful.

• There is no failure, only feedback.

• All behaviour has a purpose.• The meaning of a communication is the response it

produces• Having choice is better than having no choice.• You are doing the best you can and you can probably do

better. • You create your own reality.• Mentoring is a synergistic partnership. Relationships are

more than the sum of their parts.• The client has the answers; The mentor has the questions. • If you want to understand, act!

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Active Listening

Listening to discern all there is to be heard and understood

• Listen for clues.• Ask questions to draw out the

context.• Reflect back (Say what you heard

to verify your understanding).

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Open Questioning

Process of asking sharply focused questions to help individuals discover their truth.

1. Listen for contextual clues.2. Ask questions about what’s missing.3. Use How, What, Where, When, Who4. Careful of Why – elicits beliefs5. Continue to listen and ask respectful

questions to help the individual discover their own answers.

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80:20 Rule (of thumb)

• In a session a Mentor should be listening for about 80% of the time

• Generally a Mentor should do less than 20% of the talking

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Considering Learning Styles

• Activists enjoy new experiences and excitement and learn best when thrown in at the deep end.

• Reflectors like to listen, review and analyse before making a decision.

• Pragmatists learn best by putting ideas into practice.

• Theorists prefer exploring and synthesising ideas and information.

• NOTE: The key to effective learning is being competent in each mode when it is appropriate

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Giving Feedback

• The recommendation is to follow a few simple rules when giving feedback (use the so called feedback sandwich).– State as many things that have gone well

as possible (at least two).– State what could be done even better.– End with something positive

• Keep feedback to what you could see, hear, and add in any of your own feelings: avoid judgements.

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Boundaries

• Why have a Contract?– A Contract for Mentoring is a vitally

important first step because it sets the expectations and the boundaries of the relationship

– Written or Verbal?

• Examples to consider in handout

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General Session Framework

• Establish a relaxed, yet businesslike atmosphere

• Gain Consensus on the purpose of the meeting• Explore the issues from the mentee’s

perspective– Clarify and elucidate– Challenge assumptions– Stimulate Analysis– Draw on Own Experience– Build confidence and motivation– Agree options for action/consideration– Agree actions by both partners– Agree Milestones

• Summarise• Outline agenda for next meeting

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Tools and Techniques

• A myriad – see for example Techniques for Coaching and Mentoring by David Megginson & David Clutterbuck

• One of the Most important is a Goal Setting Process– See G.R.O.W model in manual

– and the following…

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The Seven Golden Rules of Goals

1. Goals are expressed in the positive. 2. Make the goal specific.3. Decide how you will get evidence

and feedback for achievement.4. Marshall your resources.5. Be proactive.6. Pay attention to ecology.7. Make an action plan

Present State/Current situation

Desired State/Outcome Goal

Journey

(Process Goal)

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Ongoing Mentoring Relationship

How do you develop?

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Developing Qualities & Skills of Mentor/Mentee

• See Manual page 30 and 37• & List of Skills

– Looking– Listening– Empathising– Questioning– Giving feedback– Intuiting– Checking– Goal-setting

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Exercise - Create an Action Plan for Self Development

(PDP)• Discuss in two’s [22 minutes each]

(or three’s have 15 mins each)

• Exploring areas that each other could improve: What general areas do they want to work on?

• Creating an action plan for improvement: What specifically will they address?

• How do they propose to work with what has been chosen?

• What do they want to achieve and by when?

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Appreciation of Difference

• There are many ways to approach or respond to a situation.

• Meta programs can give an indication of different approaches (when you know about them)

• Questionnaire Handout to complete – (15 mins)

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Exercise – Compare Results

• Find someone you haven’t yet worked with

• Compare your profiles• Discuss what that means to you

– 20 mins in total

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Evaluating the RelationshipEvaluation should not just be relegated to the end of the mentoringrelationship. Evaluation is an ongoing process and in many ways ininherent to the mentoring process. Formal evaluation should be

builtinto the process - perhaps even into the contract. Each mentoringsessionshould begin with an evaluation of the mentee's progress since the lastmeeting, for instance:• How has the mentee transferred what was learnt in the mentoring

session to the workplace? • What obstacles were encountered?• What gains were made?• What victories has the mentee achieved?• What habitual behaviour or self-limiting beliefs has the mentee

become aware of?• How has this affected his or her actions? • What issues need to be further explored?• Does the mentee require more direction in certain areas?• Does the mentee require more support and encouragement in certain

areas?

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Ending a Mentoring Relationship

Start with the End in Mind!

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Ending the Relationship

• Generally a Mentoring Relationship lasts between 2 and 5 years

• Ends when one or other decides it is no longer needed or wanted

• Emotional considerations• Start with the end in mind – i.e.

– IT IS A TEMPORARY ALIGNMENT• Friendship may continue• Clear agreed Start and Finish points

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Final Thoughts

“True wisdom comes from a passionate commitment to the constant process of taking multiple perspectives.” Robert Dilts

Thank you for your attention

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeing new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” Marcel Proust