Chapter 3: Self Esteem Chapter 3: Self Esteem and Mental Healthand Mental Health

JOURNAL QUESTION OF THE JOURNAL QUESTION OF THE DAY!!!DAY!!!

WHAT ARE YOUR STRENGTHS WHAT ARE YOUR STRENGTHS AS A PERSON???AS A PERSON???

What is Self-Esteem?What is Self-Esteem?

Self-esteem: measure of how much Self-esteem: measure of how much you value, respect, and feel you value, respect, and feel confident about yourselfconfident about yourself Affects how you communicate with Affects how you communicate with

othersothers Shy, passive, lack confidenceShy, passive, lack confidence

Affects decisions you make about healthAffects decisions you make about health Es. Overeating, taking risksEs. Overeating, taking risks

Benefits of High Self-EsteemBenefits of High Self-Esteem

INCREASED RESPECT: INCREASED RESPECT: Take care of themselvesTake care of themselves

INCREASED ABILITY TO REACH GOALS:INCREASED ABILITY TO REACH GOALS: More likely to set and reach realistic goalsMore likely to set and reach realistic goals

INCREASED WILLINGNESS TO TRY:INCREASED WILLINGNESS TO TRY: Willing to try new things without being Willing to try new things without being

discourageddiscouraged INCREASED FEELING OF VALUE:INCREASED FEELING OF VALUE:

Feel like they matter in family, school, and Feel like they matter in family, school, and communitycommunity

HIGH vs. LOW SELF-ESTEEMHIGH vs. LOW SELF-ESTEEM

HIGH SELF-ESTEEMHIGH SELF-ESTEEM Speaks up for selfSpeaks up for self Respects self and Respects self and

othersothers Has confidenceHas confidence Tries new thingsTries new things Feels valuable to Feels valuable to

societysociety Adjusts to changeAdjusts to change Feels optimisticFeels optimistic Makes decisions based Makes decisions based

on valueson values

LOW SELF-ESTEEMLOW SELF-ESTEEM Feels InsecureFeels Insecure Disrespects self and Disrespects self and

othersothers Vulnerable to peer Vulnerable to peer

pressurepressure Doesn’t feel valuableDoesn’t feel valuable Feels depressedFeels depressed Fears failureFears failure Uses drugs and alcoholUses drugs and alcohol Feels pessimisticFeels pessimistic Behaves destructivelyBehaves destructively

Self Esteem DevelopmentSelf Esteem Development

Begins to develop at birthBegins to develop at birth

Self-concept: how one views oneselfSelf-concept: how one views oneself If you view yourself as valuable/ likeable, If you view yourself as valuable/ likeable,

your self-esteem is highyour self-esteem is high How you interpret messages about yourself How you interpret messages about yourself

has a lot to do with how you view yourselfhas a lot to do with how you view yourself Messages shape how you view yourselfMessages shape how you view yourself Use “constructive criticism”Use “constructive criticism”

Improving your self-esteemImproving your self-esteem

Use positive self-talk:Use positive self-talk: the things you say to yourself STRONGLY the things you say to yourself STRONGLY

influence your self-esteeminfluence your self-esteem Act with integrity: Act with integrity:

““integrity”- characteristic of doing what one integrity”- characteristic of doing what one knows is rightknows is right

Choose supportive friends:Choose supportive friends: Avoid critical or disrespectful peopleAvoid critical or disrespectful people

Accept yourself:Accept yourself: See all of your imperfections and still think of See all of your imperfections and still think of

yourself as valuableyourself as valuable

Using good communication skillsUsing good communication skills

Communication: the process through Communication: the process through which two or more people exchange which two or more people exchange informationinformation Prevent misunderstandingsPrevent misunderstandings

Be clear, ask if you are feeling a certain wayBe clear, ask if you are feeling a certain way Build healthy relationshipsBuild healthy relationships

How you communicate with others affects How you communicate with others affects how people relate to youhow people relate to you

Expressing yourselfExpressing yourself Express your feelings in a healthy wayExpress your feelings in a healthy way

Communication stylesCommunication styles

Passive: does not offer opposition Passive: does not offer opposition when challenged or pressuredwhen challenged or pressured

Aggressive: to be hostile and Aggressive: to be hostile and unfriendly in the way one expresses unfriendly in the way one expresses oneselfoneself

Assertive: express oneself in a direct, Assertive: express oneself in a direct, respectful wayrespectful way calmlycalmly

Speaking SkillsSpeaking Skills

Verbal communicationVerbal communication Voice volumeVoice volume Tone and pitchTone and pitch

““I” messages: way of talking that explains how I” messages: way of talking that explains how you feel while remaining firm, calm, and politeyou feel while remaining firm, calm, and polite

Removes blame from the situationRemoves blame from the situation ““You” messages: places blame/ may cause You” messages: places blame/ may cause

defense mechanismdefense mechanism Empathy: ability to understand another Empathy: ability to understand another

person’s feelings, behaviors, and attitudesperson’s feelings, behaviors, and attitudes

Mental and Emotional HealthMental and Emotional Health

Mental Health: state of mental well-Mental Health: state of mental well-being in which one can cope with the being in which one can cope with the demands of daily lifedemands of daily life Having high self-esteem and being able Having high self-esteem and being able

to develop healthy, intimate to develop healthy, intimate relationshipsrelationships

Express anger and emotions in healthful Express anger and emotions in healthful waysways

Mentally and Emotionally healthy Mentally and Emotionally healthy people have……people have……

1.) A sense of control:1.) A sense of control: Take charge/responsibility for their livesTake charge/responsibility for their lives

2.) Ability to endure failures and 2.) Ability to endure failures and frustrations:frustrations: Likely to persist through set-backsLikely to persist through set-backs

3.) Ability to see events positively:3.) Ability to see events positively: Optimistic/ see challenges as opportunitiesOptimistic/ see challenges as opportunities

4.) Ability to express emotions in a healthy 4.) Ability to express emotions in a healthy way:way: Do not hold emotions in or deny how you feelDo not hold emotions in or deny how you feel

Maslows Hierarchy of NeedsMaslows Hierarchy of Needs

Abraham MaslowAbraham Maslow Psychologist: person who studies Psychologist: person who studies

emotions and behaviorsemotions and behaviors Believed everyone has a drive to reach Believed everyone has a drive to reach

self-actualizationself-actualization Created “hierarchy of needs”Created “hierarchy of needs”

Maslow’s Hierarchy of NeedsMaslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

Self-actualization: achievement of the best Self-actualization: achievement of the best that a person can bethat a person can be Physical: food, water, sleep, exercisePhysical: food, water, sleep, exercise Safety: shelter, protectionSafety: shelter, protection Social: love, acceptance, friendshipSocial: love, acceptance, friendship Esteem: met through self-respect and Esteem: met through self-respect and

achievementachievement Self-actualization: full potentialSelf-actualization: full potential

Hard to reach S.A.!! Work one stage at a time….Hard to reach S.A.!! Work one stage at a time….

Expressing EmotionsExpressing Emotions

Emotion: feeling that is produced in Emotion: feeling that is produced in response to life experiencesresponse to life experiences Can have positive or negative effectsCan have positive or negative effects Do not deny/build up an emotionDo not deny/build up an emotion Learning to manage emotions is key to Learning to manage emotions is key to

S.A.S.A.

Managing EmotionManaging Emotion

Talk it out: can help you figure things Talk it out: can help you figure things out/manage feelingsout/manage feelings

Blow off steam: release energy in a Blow off steam: release energy in a positive way (ex. Exercise)positive way (ex. Exercise)

Be creative: write about feelings, Be creative: write about feelings, sing, drawsing, draw

AngerAnger

Results from frustration or Results from frustration or helplessnesshelplessness

Understand what you can and cant Understand what you can and cant controlcontrol

Deal with emotions appropriately- you Deal with emotions appropriately- you are responsible for emotionsare responsible for emotions

Recognize how you feel physically Recognize how you feel physically when angrywhen angry

Use the “I” messagesUse the “I” messages

FearFear

May not be pleasant, but can be May not be pleasant, but can be helpfulhelpful

Protects us from danger (ex. Fight or Protects us from danger (ex. Fight or flight)flight) May be harmful to health if prolongedMay be harmful to health if prolonged

Use self-talk to get over fears/ use Use self-talk to get over fears/ use controlled exposurecontrolled exposure

GuiltGuilt

Alerts you that you are behaving in a Alerts you that you are behaving in a way that goes against your valuesway that goes against your values

Keeps you true to yourselfKeeps you true to yourself

To your best to right the wrongTo your best to right the wrong

Can contribute to stress levelsCan contribute to stress levels

JealousyJealousy

Caused by fear that something you Caused by fear that something you own or love will be lostown or love will be lost

Twinge of jealousy is naturalTwinge of jealousy is natural Talk about itTalk about it Be thankful for what you haveBe thankful for what you have

LonelinessLoneliness

Emotion that makes you feel Emotion that makes you feel (mentally) isolate from others(mentally) isolate from others

Become involved:Become involved: Join sportsJoin sports VolunteerVolunteer Go out and meet peopleGo out and meet people

Defense MechanismsDefense Mechanisms

Unconscious thought or behavior used to Unconscious thought or behavior used to avoid experiencing unpleasant emotions avoid experiencing unpleasant emotions (see page 66, table 2)(see page 66, table 2)

Don’t plan or decide to use themDon’t plan or decide to use them Can be helpful (ex compensation, Can be helpful (ex compensation,

sublimation)sublimation) Short term may make you feel betterShort term may make you feel better Will not make emotions disappearWill not make emotions disappear Find a balance between managing emotions Find a balance between managing emotions

and using defense mechanismsand using defense mechanisms