camp

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2016!

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All the information you need for a super summer camp season

Photography by Shawna Shenette. Hair by Rob Roy Hair Salons.Clothing providedby Little V Designs.

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Summer camp is not just about swimming, sports, and sitting by the campfire singing songs. It’s the one place where kids can be kids, where they are free

to make their own decisions without parental input, enjoy new experi-ences, and explore their individuality. Experts say today’s camp experience offers a host of unexpected benefits for children, which parents may not realize or anticipate. Bette Bussel, executive director of the American Camp Association, New England, says camp may even be the antidote to some of the issues that plague today’s youth: obesity, lack of problem-solving and communication skills, dependency on electronic devic-es, and nature-deficit disorder. “If I had one wish, it would be that every child gets to experience sum-mer camp,” she says.

Nature-Deficit Disorder Scroll through social media these days and you’re bound to find a story about the fact that children are not getting enough playtime in school. In fact, they don’t get a lot of unstruc-tured playtime at home, either. Chil-dren are spending large amounts of time by themselves online or interact-ing with their peers virtually.

Studies and books, such as Spark: The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the Brain by John Ratney, have shown that physical activity plays an important role in the brain health of children. Yet, some schools have eliminated recess and, unfortu-nately, your average child may not have the opportunity to run around their neighborhood free to explore. Richard Louv coined the term “nature-deficit disorder” in his book, Last Child in the Woods. The term refers to the fact that humans, espe-cially children, are spending less time outdoors, resulting in a range of behavioral problems. “This generation of kids we’re raising now is the first generation to not have a real connection with nature,” says Eric Arnold, executive director at the Hale Reservation in Westwood. Spending time outside is important not only for mental health, he says, but also for brain and eye health. “Inside, everything is predetermined. Color is static and nothing moves. When you go outside, your eyes have to work harder, which makes your brain work harder,” Arnold notes. He thinks that camp is the perfect pre-scription for nature-deficit disorder.

Social and emotional skills Because of the lack of play, experts

say children aren’t learning the social and emotional skills that come from interacting with peers as they did in generations past. And due to increas-ing pressure to improve academ-ics, schools may not be equipped with programs or have time in the school day to help students develop social and emotional skills. For many schools, lesson content is the priority. “Content isn’t what matters. What really matters is the ability to inter-act with each other,” Arnold says. “Camp is the perfect balance between content and social-emotional develop-ment.” Campers must interact with other campers and staff face-to-face and learn how to solve disagreements. “They have to have real conversa-tions with real emotions (at camp),” Bussel notes. One of the most valuable aspects of a camp experience is the connections made between campers, in which life-long friendships are formed. “At camp, kids are able to shed any preconceived notions about them-selves. They’re free from social expec-tations and are able to make new friends easier,” she adds.

Unplug Camp is a place where children are forced to unplug. The majority of camps don’t allow campers or staff to use electronics. And parents, who are accustomed to being able to reach their child at all times, may have a harder time dealing with that than their camper. “We have to tell parents that we’re with them all day long, and if there’s an issue we’ll handle it or get in touch with them if it’s necessary,” says Arnold, noting that rarely is there a need to call home. He adds that kids seem to adjust much more easily to unplugging, even commenting that they didn’t miss their electronics.

Independence Experts agree: Kids today are over-scheduled and stressed out. They’re told what to do and when, at school,

at home, and even at extracurricular activities. “Life is pretty much decided for them,” Bussel says. At camp, kids are free to make decisions on their own, from deciding which activities they want to do to what they want to eat for lunch. “There aren’t many places that are built just for children. Camp is an environment created just for them,” she adds. Children are encouraged to explore a variety of interests, allowing them to not only learn about themselves and others, but also discover how to make decisions and solve problems on their own — experiences that empower them well beyond a week or two at camp.

Counselor- in-Training programs While there are many benefits to attending camp, being a Counselor-in-Training (CIT) is one many may overlook. CIT programs are usually available for teens ages 16 and 17. Some camps offer Junior CIT programs for 14- and 15-year-olds. These programs help young people prepare to be counsel-ors at camp. A CIT program is usually a child’s first opportunity for real responsibility. “They’re asked to care for, watch, and help provide activities for chil-dren [at camp],” Arnold says. The program also teaches leadership skills. “The ability to stand in front of a group, organize your thoughts, present a plan, and then execute the plan with children is true leadership. This skill is incredibly transferable to other environments, be it academic or career,” he adds. The CITs are role models for younger children, who look up to them because they are close in age. The younger children see an older child modeling good behavior, compassion, and empathy, making this program a vital part of the camp experience for the campers and the counselors.

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CAMP IT UP 2016!

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4 CAMPITUP2016!

“Being shy is entirely normal, and parents shouldn’t overcompensate by not offering them the same opportunities other kids have,” says Dr. Elina Cymerman, developmental psychologist and clinical psychia-trist at Tufts University Medical Cen-ter in Boston. She explains that in most cases, being shy or introverted is simply a temperament, or set of traits. “Understand this is a person who is slow to warm up, and they approach the world in a more cautious way,” Cymerman says. Because of their cautious approach to the world, these kids simply need lots of infor-mation and details, she adds.

Choosing the Right Camp

“Camps have become the neighbor-hoods of our youth,” says Jenn Beck-er Carpenter, camp director of Camp Aldersgate, an outdoor ministry site of the United Methodist Church in North Scituate, RI (campaldersgate.com). Carpenter, who is also presi-dent of the Rhode Island Association of Camps, believes camps are even more valuable and important today due to the loss of neighborhoods and recess time.

“Kids don’t know how to make friends face-to-face anymore,” she adds. “Kids need free-form play to create those relationships organi-cally.” When deciding where to send your shy or quiet child, Carpenter recommends first and foremost that the camper have a say in choosing which camp he attends. “It’s really important that kids are part of the decision-making pro-cess,” she says. “It can help them feel more in control.” She also advises parents to look for a camp with a schedule that has a variety of programming, including downtime. Camps that offer nonstop activities, as well as solely group activities, are not going to be a good fit for an introverted child, she says. These kids need to have choices and not be forced into activities. Carpenter explains that at Camp Aldersgate, staffers are trained to encourage campers to try new things (a food, a game, or make a new friend) — but the children are not forced. “It’s called challenge by choice,” she says. “Our big goal is not to change kids, but to make them the best they can be. We’re not trying to change introverts into extroverts.” And while most families will read-ily attend the open house prior to

camp, Carpenter says it is important for parents of introverted children to schedule a private tour with the director and have the child bring his or her own list of questions. “Open houses are great, but can be very impersonal and may not help your child develop the 1:1 personal connection that will help them feel safe at the camp,” says Danielle Fitzpatrick, director of Young Arts at MoCo Arts, a family-centered nonprofit arts education organiza-tion that offers multi-arts camps in Keene, NH (moco.org). “I answer all the parents’ questions, then I ask the child to tell me some of their ques-tions, fears, or excitement about camp. Sometimes the parents think they know the questions to ask to help their kids feel safe, but often the child has their own concerns the parent never thought of.” In addition to a private tour, Fitz-patrick recommends parents ask the camp for a sample schedule of a typical day and then review it, step-by-step, with their camper. While going over the schedule, find out what specifically worries your child. Dr. Cymerman explains this is an important step for introverted kids as abundant details and information make them feel more comfortable. “Adults’ intuitive response to anxiety in kids is often to say, ‘Don’t

worry, it’ll be fine.’ But it’s more productive to ask, ‘What are you worried about, exactly? Let’s figure this out together,’ then go through step-by-step, problem solving with your child,” she says. Sean Kent agrees information is key for these children, and recommends parents speak to the camp director about any concerns they may have. Kent is the education coordinator and camp director of Wild @ Art! Summer Camp at Mass Audubon’s Museum of American Bird Art in Canton (massaudubon.org/maba). At this 121-acre wildlife sanctuary south of Boston, children experi-ence a combination of art and nature explorations. Kent helps children develop a con-nection to camp by writing a person-al note to each camper in his pro-gram before it begins. In his notes, he tells campers what they can expect when they arrive at camp. He also sends parents the same type of letter so they may begin talking with their child about their upcoming camp experience. He also makes it a point to send invitations to campers to attend special events occurring at the museum prior to the start of camp, so they may see the facility and become familiar with the sur-roundings, as well as meet some of the counselors on staff.

How To Prep Your Shy Child For A Great Time At CampBY MICHELLE PERRAS-CHARRON

CAMP IT UP 2016!

Parents can rest assured camp opportunities exist that will suit any age, style, or interest a child may have. But what if your child is shy or quiet…an introvert, perhaps? Will he enjoy camp? Should she even go at all?

BAYSTATEPARENT 5

When choosing a camp, MoCo Arts’s Fitzpatrick says parents should also take into consideration how approachable or accessible the camp director is. Information pack-ets from her camp always include a direct email to the camp director, so parents do not have to go through a receptionist when it comes to sensi-tive matters about their child, she adds.

Tips for a Great First Day

• Don’t be late! Start the morning early and let your child take a role in packing their bags or choosing their clothes. Fitzpatrick explains that walking in late and having all eyes on them can be stressful for a camper, and can also leave a child with the feeling that they missed out on something.

• Practice opening juice boxes, snack containers, etc. before going to camp. Fitzpatrick says mastering these tasks will help children feel empowered.

• Practice a drop-off ritual before the first day of camp. Fitzpatrick offers this example: “Ten kisses from Mommy to fill up your love gas tank, and then you will be fueled and ready to go with your camp coun-

selor and Mommy will leave.” Have your child help develop an agreed-upon plan and stick with it. Deviate from the plan even one bit and the whole plan collapses, she says.

• At drop-off, find a counselor to introduce your child to and get them engaged talking about pets, books, etc., then head out. “It may seem like a good idea to hang around for a while, or join in, but I have rarely seen that work,” Fitzpat-rick says.Parents should not have a plan for their child to call home if they miss Mommy. “In my years of camp directing, I have never seen that be successful,” Fitzpatrick says. Instead, she suggests tucking a lov-ing note in the child’s lunch box. Add a crayon and the child can draw/write letters home when they feel homesick. This allows children to express their feelings safely and move on. Dr. Cymerman says parents often intervene too early when it comes to a homesick child. She suggests parents resist the urge to pick up their child from camp, as homesick-ness is often a normal, common occurrence that passes in a day or two. “We want to be sensitive to our children, but if we remove every obstacle, that can be detrimental to their development,” she says. “We

deprive them of opportunities to work through these stresses and be successful.” Cymerman points out, however, that homesickness can be serious in a very small percentage of chil-dren. Children who are not eating or sleeping, or are unresponsive to other children as well as adults, should return home, at which point parents may want to seek the help of a mental health professional.

Reaping the Benefits

“Camp is not going to shift their internal person in a significant way,” Cymerman says of introverted chil-dren. “But the challenges and anxi-ety of meeting new people does set them on a positive path for future interactions and will help them to be more open to new experiences.” Camp Aldersgate’s Carpenter says that after one week of overnight camp, or by week two or three of day camp, she sees introverted chil-dren becoming more confident, par-ticipating, and trying more things at camp. “It boosts their self-esteem,” she says. “It shows them that it’s OK to be an introvert, that they can still make friends, and that there is a place for them in the world.”

Camp, especially overnight camp, also allows introverted children to forge strong friendships and become more self-assured in social situa-tions. “They’re able to make con-nections they might not have made without the guidance of camp staff,” she adds. Donna M. Denette, director and co-founder of Children First Enter-prises, a nonprofit child care orga-nization in Granby, points out that camp can be very empowering for shy, quiet, or introverted children. “They learn they can be away from their families, they can form friend-ships, speak publicly, act in a skit, sing a silly song, scale a wall, or solve a problem,” she says. “They learn they are capable.” Denette also emphasizes an impor-tant aspect of child development: having opportunities to struggle and overcome. Children who have opportunities to struggle reap huge developmental benefits from the pride and real self-confidence that comes from overcoming challenges, she says. “Our society has reframed danger, struggle, and challenges (as well as unhappiness) as things to avoid and protect our children from when, in fact, they are important, critical growth opportunities,” Denette says. “Our children would never have learned to walk if we refused to let them fall.”

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Last summer, my 10-year-old son had his first experience with sleep-away camp. The half-hour drive to drop him

off for the week was filled with a lot of reminders from me — and even more eye rolling from him.

“Remember not to forget to apply bug spray every day,” I said. “And don’t forget sun-screen. I don’t want your fun to be ruined by a burn.”

“Mom, don’t worry. I will!” he said, with more than just a tinge of exasperation in his voice.

Such is the often angst-filled first drop-off at an overnight camp. But whether it’s mom who is worried, or the first-time camper who has a little anxiety, there are ways to gauge if you’ve chosen the right time to try sleep-away camp and keep the fretting to a minimum.

“When a parent asks, ‘Is my child old enough for sleep-away camp?’ this is usually a two-pronged question, the latter being, ‘Am I ready to send my child to overnight camp?’” said Dr. Kerri Augusto, psychology professor and co-director of BC5 Cheer Camp, an overnight sum-

mer camp held on the campus of Becker College in Leicester. “There is no set formula for determining whether a child is ‘old enough,’ as the child’s temperament is more important to consider than their age. In general, if a child is asking about going to an overnight camp and the child has had some minimal experiences away from home, such as sleeping over at the home of a friend or relative, then the child is ready for sleep-over camp.”

Shannon Donovan-Monti, executive director of Chimney Corners Camp for Girls in Becket, looks for benchmarks, such as understanding basic daily hygiene routines. The starting camper at Chimney Corners (a part of the Becket-Chimney Cor-ners YMCA in the Berkshires) is finishing second grade, and Donovan-Monti believes that is a good time for a first experience for many children.

“What you see with that age is when they should be doing basic self care: showering, dressing themselves. Being able to take care of themselves and with only a little supervision,” she said.

Younger campers are great because they have a tendency to be more in the moment and anticipate less, she added.

“They are more concerned with what is right in front them instead of projecting how long they will be there,” Donovan-Monti noted. “Sometimes our 8-year-olds are doing better than the 11-year-olds during the first few days of camp.”

But more important than age is the interest in having a sleep-away experience.

“I ask parents, ‘Do they want to come to camp?’ because that’s a fundamental issue,” Donovan-Monti said. “I am concerned when a child says he or she doesn’t want to go. You really need a certain amount of buy-in from the child, too.”

How To Prep Your Camper

If your child is raring to go and says he is ready, how can you help him have the best experi-ence? Augusto said in terms of preparation, parents’ attitudes

are critical.“Successful campers have

parents who transmit a feeling of excitement and possibility when talking about an upcoming camp,” she said. “These parents focus on favorite activities and new experiences and opportuni-ties to make friends, and as a result, their children come to camp filled with positive expec-tations.”

One absolute no-no that Augusto and Donovan-Monti noted: Do not promise your child an early pickup if she finds the camp experience to be less than ideal.

“Less-successful campers often have parents who allow their own anxieties to filter into the pre-camp conversation and offer options such as, ‘If you don’t like it, I’ll come get you’ or ‘You can come home at any time,’” Augusto said. “Though it’s meant to provide a feeling of security, these offers plant the idea that camp won’t be fun, and rather than work through the anxiety inherent in having a new experi-ence, the child is likely to view any discomfort as a signal that it’s time to go home.”

How To Gauge Your Child’s Readiness…

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Sleep-Away Camp:

CAMP IT UP 2016!

BAYSTATEPARENT 7

“By offering to come get them early if they don’t like camp, it is subtly telling them it’s not going to work out,” Donovan-Monti added. “And it puts the role of rescuer on the parent. That’s not a great role. To say, ‘If you feel bad for even a sec-ond, we are going to step in’ is a bad idea.”

Both directors suggest help-ing children understand that a few bad moments are inevitable and offer strategies for getting through the down times, such as reading a book or another enjoyable activity.

How To Prep Yourself

But what if your child is yearning to get away for a week or two of overnight camp, and you don’t feel ready? Augusto and Donovan-Monti recommend keeping that anxiety in check and trying not to be in touch too much over the time the child is away.

“Perhaps the most contro-versial and anxiety-inducing element of overnight camp involves access to telephones and technology to call home,” Augusto said. “Many parents will state that their child will ‘feel better knowing he or she can call me.’ In fact, it is often the parent who feels bet-ter knowing there is a lifeline between parent-child at all times. But this connection to home does more harm than good.”

Donovan-Monti said Chimney Corners encourages letters to stay in touch, rather than a phone call.

“Letters allow the reader to think about what is being said,” she said. “We encourage par-ents not to try to manage the camp experience from afar. In writing letters, don’t talk about fun things happening at home, because then they feel they are missing it. Keep the message positive and let them know how proud you are that they are having this camp experience.”

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8 CAMPITUP2016!

“Camp is a difficult one because if you get it wrong, you’re going to hear it all summer,” laughs Sharon Riddle, publisher of spedchild-mass.com and a mother of two sons with special needs. The Massachusetts mother cre-ated her Website nine years ago, after moving to the Bay State and finding no one-stop-shop for

information on local events and programs for children with special needs and their families. “Information was piecemeal and disjointed. So many programs that were good were not having seats filled, not having parents come, because nobody knew about it,” she remembers. One of her site’s features is a list-

ing of more than 100 camps in East-ern, Central, and Western Massa-chusetts designed for children with special needs, or traditional camps with inclusion programs. As a par-ent trying to find programs and camps for her children, “it became glaringly obvious for me that [this site] was a huge need for families in Massachusetts,” Riddle says.

Find camps that align with your child’s interests

This tip is solid advice for the par-ent of any child heading to camp. Ask the child what he likes to do and try to find a program centered

5 Ways To Find The Right Camp For A Child With

SPECIAL NEEDS

BY MELISSA SHAW

Choosing the right summer camp for a child isn’t easy, and it can be even more challenging for those whose children have special needs. Yet experts say parents can find the right camp by doing a little homework, asking a lot of questions, and

communicating honestly with camp staff.

CAMP IT UP 2016!

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around that. If a child loves art and could draw all day, an outdoor sports camp may not be the best choice. Even if a camp fits a parent’s budget and availability, if it doesn’t fit the child, why bother? Experts also advise considering a child’s preferences and triggers. In what situation does she thrive and in which does she have the most difficulty? For example, a camp with a lot of field trips may be a poor choice for a child who prefers rou-tine or is anxious in new situations. If a child succeeds best in small-group settings, a program that offers only large group activities may not be the right fit. If a child has never been to camp before, is a full-day program the best option? “You really need to say, ‘What does my child like? Am I trying to fit a square peg into a round hole?’” Riddle says. She saw the power of the right camp first-hand when her youngest, now 17, finally found a camp that fit his interests. He had tried a variety of camps and programs, but nothing moved him until the family found an aviation camp that centered around his love of flying. “He came back a different kid,” Riddle says. “For the first time he said, ‘I felt like people really got me. People who had the same passion and interest as me.’” “Parents really need to have an understanding that it’s going to take time to find the right programs,” adds Anna Wood, certified therapeu-tic recreation specialist and execu-tive director of The Bridge Center, a Bridgewater organization that offers year-round programs and sum-mer camps for people with special needs. “Just like shopping, you don’t want to pick and buy just to buy. Parents should thoroughly think about their child, their needs, and their interests — all of those com-ponents that really make up their child. Take those things and find a program that fits their child, instead of taking their child and putting them in a program that just doesn’t fit them, but it’s the only option.” Wood says her organization sees the latter often. “Parents are so eager and excited to consider a summer camp or an afterschool program, and they want their children to make friends, but Johnny really hates soccer, but that’s the only day Mom has avail-able, so she puts Johnny in soccer. We really encourage parents to just step back, understand there are pro-grams out there that will be a better fit for your child and make sure that they leave that with a positive expe-rience,” she adds.

Ask a lot of questions

When considering a camp, Riddle highlights several potential topics to cover when talking with staff: Safety: Who is teaching and watch-ing your child? What are their train-ing, education, and credentials? From field trips to bathroom visits, what is the student-to-staff ratio? Are campers monitored to ensure they respect personal boundaries?

Acceptance: Does the makeup of the camper population reflect your child or is it inclusive? “Kids with disabilities are just like everybody else,” Riddle notes. “They want to be with kids like themselves, but they also want to be included with everybody.”

Medications: For children who need medication during the day, what is the procedure and who will admin-ister? How many nurses are staffing the program? If a child needs medi-

cation at a specific time and the nurse is handling an emergency, is there a backup plan for administer-ing meds?

Food: How do programs ensure chil-dren with allergies do not get access to food that will cause a reaction? Are snacks provided? Can families send in snacks to ensure their child is safe and does not feel left out?

Communication: How can a child communicate problems, successes, and challenges, especially if he is nonverbal? Does the staff send home a daily note or log about the child’s day? If parents are expecting a daily report, yet the staff operates under a “No news is good news” policy, there will be a conflict. Par-ents should ask ahead of time if and how they can get regular updates, if desired. At The Bridge Center, Wood says each family is brought in for a get-to-know-you session, where parents can ask questions and staff can assess what supports a child needs.

“We really love it when parents ask those questions about what sorts of supports we have,” she says. “‘What is the education and training of our counselors? How often will my child be able to take a break? Do you help him take a break if he needs to take a break and he’s not choosing to do so? Do you use visual schedules? Are there timers?’ All those little pieces that parents know their children use at school or need at home.”

If a camp doesn’t advertise accommodations,

ask anyway “If you go to a camp fair, ask camps what they’re willing to accom-modate [IEP, food modification, special diet, 1-on-1 aide, etc.], even if they’re not a specific camp for children with special needs,” Riddle advises. “Oftentimes they will say yes. I always tell families: ‘Ask!’ A lot of organizations are now looking to

talk about inclusiveness.” Wood notes that supports, such as a visual schedule (in which chil-dren see pictures that show exactly what is happening that day at the beginning of each day), are simple to execute and can benefit children of all abilities. However, camps not specifically designed for students with special needs may not realize the benefit until a parent mentions it. “They might not realize the impor-tance of a visual schedule and how easy that is to implement into the typical camp day,” she adds. “From a program side, a lot of people hear about disabilities and inclusion and think that it’s really over-the-top, expensive, involved initiatives, and it really isn’t always the case. Sched-ules help everybody, not just kids with disabilities.” Wood adds that talking to a child’s school team [teacher, aide, guidance counselor, etc.] is a great way to get suggestions for tools, accommoda-tions, and strategies that can best help a camper succeed.

Communicatehonestly about your

child’s needs “When I worked in [municipal] parks and rec, before we started our inclusion programs, parents would hold back information because they were so scared that we wouldn’t let their kid come to the program if they told me, ‘Sometimes Johnny tries to run away from the group,’” Wood says. “Instead, the perspective I took as a provider was, ‘Thank you for giving me information so we can make sure the supports and staff are there to help avoid that.’ It’s a mind-set of not being scared to supply the information and understanding the child’s day will be better if more information is shared.” “I think one of the greatest fears is that parents are nervous their child’s going to be turned away, so they withhold information, and once they’re in camp, there may be chal-lenges the camp’s not prepared for,” adds Terrie Campbell, executive director of Camp Howe, a Western Massachusetts co-ed residential camp that boasts one of the oldest inclusion programs in the country. “I’ve had a lot of parents who have come to us and initially are hesitant to give all the information, but it’s growing in that partnership that pro-vides the best experience for their kids.”

Don’t be afraid to ask about other camps

“If you find a camp you like, but you just can’t make it work, ask if they know other programs,” Riddle suggests. “They probably do, they just need a reminder.”The process can appear overwhelm-ing at the outset, but Riddle says finding the right camp is worth the work. “Camps have come a long, long way in the past 20 years,” she notes. “You will find now so many more programs that will say they are inclu-sive. There’s so many more new pro-grams that have come on, designed for disabilities. “[Inclusion] is the true foundation of our camp,” Camp Howe’s Camp-bell adds. “Initially, a lot of people were, like, ‘Oh, isn’t that great for children with disabilities.’ Well, it’s great for all kids. You’ve got a child who’s scared of heights and they’re watching someone with Cerebral Palsy who’s in a wheelchair doing our ropes course. We all learn from each other.”

“Parents really need to have an understanding that it’s going to take time to find the right programs. Just like shopping, you don’t want to pick and buy just to buy.”

— Anna Wood, certified therapeutic recreation specialist and executive director, The Bridge Center

10 CAMPITUP2016!

Allergies, in particular food aller-gies, are on the rise in the U.S. One out of every 13 kids has some type of food allergy, which means camp nurses’ offices are faced with more potential medical issues than the traditional poison ivy rash or sun-burn. Communication between three parties — camp staff, campers, and parents — is critical to a successful camp experience. Many camps have an open house for families to visit once they’re registered. Don’t wait for this day to start talking with the camp staff about your child’s aller-gies. Contact the camp director and, if possible, the camp medical staff before registering your camper. “Plan extra time to coordinate paperwork and phone calls,” rec-ommends one parent of a child with multiple allergies. “And don’t assume they will be able to accom-modate an allergy the way a school does.” “We are lucky enough to have a parent meeting night prior to the [camp] week where parents can hand in health forms and talk to me about food and medication allergies,” says Paulette Hallihan, a registered nurse who works at a Boy Scout summer camp. “I am able to notify the caterers/kitchen staff about food allergies. I also compose a list of what type of allergy (bee sting, nuts, etc.) and antidote need-ed if a Scout does have a reaction (EpiPen, Benadryl, etc.), which is kept in the front of my health form binder for easy access.” “Most really good camps have an intro meeting, and those are the best,” says Dr. Scott Schroeder, director of the Pediatric Pulmonary and Allergy Center at Floating Hos-pital for Children at Tufts Medical Center. “These are usually three,

even four, months prior to camp. This is the place for parents to ask questions, see the camp, reduce everyone’s anxiety.” A camp needs to have an action plan for dealing with allergic reac-tions, and this will not be the same as what you might find at school. Many camps are in rural or remote locations, and may not have hospi-tal access close-by. What provisions can the camp make for storing and transporting medications? If an EpiPen cannot be warmer than 85 degrees and it is a hot summer day, how will it be transported? “Parents should be asking lots of questions of the medical staff,” Dr. Schroeder notes. “You are allow-ing the staff to be your surrogates. Make sure your philosophies jibe.” “There are never too many ques-tions to ask when it comes to the safety of your child,” Hallihan adds. “We have an RN as the medical officer, other camps may have an EMT, MD, First Aider or a Respon-sible Person (RP). Our protocol is any emergency medicine, like

an inhaler for an asthma attack or EpiPen for anaphylaxis, stays with the Scout (since they are 13 or older). All other meds are given to me at check-in. Medication must be in original prescription bottles with dose and frequency on it and with the number of pills needed for the number of days they are at camp. Meds are dispensed from a First Aid office at meal times. Bedtime meds could be brought to the individual depending on where they are [in the camp].”

How to determine if your child is ready

Deciding when a child with aller-gies is ready for camp can be especially challenging for parents. Parents and camp staff need to be confident that the child will not share food. In addition, a camper needs to be aware of what to do if he feels like he is having a reaction. He cannot go off alone, even if it is to find the medical staff or go to a

main building, even if the reaction is very mild. In many cases with life-threatening allergies, campers may be responsible for carrying their medications with them so they are within reach if they need them, for instance if a child was stung by a wasp. For a day camp, parents can choose to send in all the food their child will eat during the day, but this doesn’t necessarily cover shared snacks or activities that may involve food that is not consumed, such as in crafts or science activities. “Plan to send all the food your child needs for each day with them,” a parent recommends. “Remind them not to eat anything you did not send with them, as other adults may not read packaging or be as careful as you are.” “Foods that tend to be highly aller-gic (like peanut butter) are usually kept in a separate part of the dining hall,” Scout Nurse Hallihan notes about her camp. “Most camps offer foods for gluten- or lactose-free Scouters. Areas of use (tents, dining hall, bathrooms) are checked prior to arrival for wasps’ nests, insects, mice, etc. First Aid or medical staff are available during camp hours, or 24/7 if residential camp. Numbers for local hospitals [are] posted. And, of course, there’s 911 in a true emer-gency.” With all the anxiety and fear sur-rounding letting children with aller-gies attend camp, is it really worth the experience? “Absolutely send your child to camp,” Dr. Schroeder says. “Kids who go to camp often come back much better. At camp, kids are empowered to manage symptoms [and allergies]. Camp empowers kids!”

Keys To A Safe, Fun Camp Experience

For Kids With AllergiesBY MICHELE BENNETT DECOTEAU

CAMP IT UP 2016!

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Every sleep-away camp has one: a list of what to bring. While the lists all include sleeping bags, toiletries, and swimsuits,

there are several items not on the average list that can make a camper, especially a first-timer, feel more com-fortable.

“One thing I might recommend would be a sheet for your cot,” says Peter Boll, Eagle Scout and program director for the Cub Scout programs at Treasure Valley Scout Reserva-tion in Rutland. “Often times, young Scouts — and even older ones — hate the feeling of touching a camp mat-tress. A sleeping bag is fine for sleep-ing in, but you’ll always be slipping

out of it or touching the mattress. So sending a fitted sheet and instructing them on what to do with it can make their first time sleeping away from home much more comfortable.”

In addition to a fitted sheet, Jessica Decke, camp director at the Univer-sity of Maine 4H Camp at Tanglewood in Lincoln, Maine, suggests some other bedtime comforts.

“I’m a big fan of pajamas, bathrobe, and slippers to have at camp, as well as sheets and blankets vs. a sleep-ing bag,” she says. “Whatever can be transported to make the sleeping and pre-bedtime more like home is sometimes an added bonus. Adapt-ing to camp life is hard enough, compounding that with sleeping in a

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bag, which can be hard to get out of if you have a midnight bathroom emergency and you are discombob-ulated on an unfamiliar bed. I like giving kids time to make their beds cozy and comfy, and making their cabins more like homes instead of a strange place.”

Having a sheet rather than a sleeping bag can ease the fears of kids who may not have entirely outgrown nighttime bedwetting, as well. It is much easier to make a quick exit if you are not in a mummy bag.

Decke also suggests a book or a journal. “Before bed, a book can oftentimes be nice to settle down with. If a child is a reader or a writer, they will find camp does have downtime built into it,” she notes. “And if they are a child who is generally not adept at making their own fun or having spontane-ous creative play, being able to pull out a familiar book to read in a quiet nook is a good center-ing agent. Conversely, magazines are fun to have because it builds camaraderie and is a fun social thing to bond kids together. We’ve found boys and girls bringing card games, like Magic, is fun to play during rainy times or quiet times. [They’re] small and packable, and again, build friendships in sharing and social skills.”

Most camps have an open house to meet staff and tour the grounds and facilities. This is an excellent chance to talk to staff and find out what they might add to a camp list.

“One of the funniest memories I have of volunteering as a patrol leader for a Webelos [boys in 4th-5th grades] overnight camp was that on the first day of camp after swim checks, I made a point to tell my boys to make sure they change out of their bathing suits as soon as possible — explicitly telling them not to leave them on,” Boll remem-bers. “The next afternoon, on our way back up to our campsite from lunch, I see one of the boys walk-ing slowly and uncomfortably. I call him over to me and ask him if he still had his bathing suit on. Upon his nodding, I grabbed my travel-size body powder, gave him a brief instruction, and sent him to the bathroom. Chaffing is an all-too-common, awkward experience for first-time campers, and leaving a wet bathing suit on is the best way for it to happen. So I would definitely recommend that parents send their boys to camp with some body powder — and instruct them how to use it.”

Some camp lists include letter-writing materials. Every parent hopes for letters from camp, hear-ing about all the wonderful experi-ences their children are having.

“Parents are desperate to know how their child is doing,” Decke notes. “In this age of connectivity

all the time, not hearing from them via phone or text is really hard for some families. Kids often have a hard time pulling away from doing activities in order to send mail, and a lot of times their letters make no sense, but the value is there. Fam-ily members who went to camp will connect with their own camp memories when they read that their child is singing songs or doing tra-ditional camp activities. Camp mail helps to build bonds between the camper and their family in a really positive way.”

Many camp staffs remind parents to write letters that don’t mention missing the camper. A camper who

is missing home might focus on that and become homesick. When you write letters, share your camp memories or emphasize their expe-rience.

Rather than risk mailing letters, many camps will accept letters and packages at the beginning of camp. Read camp directions or talk to the staff before sending or leaving care packages; many camps don’t allow food in the tents. And have fun with what you send with your camper.

“We’ve had parents send funny things, like flip flops that were writ-ten on. Someone sent postcards that fit together like a puzzle, that was cool. Stamps made from a

child’s photo are also hot,” Decke says.

Camps, no matter the focus or location, suggest leaving electron-ics at home.

“A phone only distracts them and causes more problems than not,” Boll says. “If a Scout or parent must get in touch with each other, there is plenty of ability to do that through camp administration.”

“No kid or camper will ever need a cell phone at camp,” Decke adds. “Digital cameras are great for pic-tures, but no phones. Camp is a time to be present in the moment, and that tie to home life takes away from the camp experience.”

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Summer camp, whether day or sleep-away, likely marks the first time a child is in an entirely new environment and away from their home and family for an extended amount of time. Sure, the weather is generally pleasant, there’s probably

swimming and camp fires galore, and camp counselors are, by

nature, friendly and outgo-ing. However, deep in the

hearts of many chil-dren there may be a small ache for home, a beloved pet, or just people they love the best. It’s called home-

sickness. And, accord-ing to Lucy Norvell,

director of development & communications at

American Camp Associa-tion, New England, it’s quite

common, especially for the first-time camper. In fact, many campers find themselves missing home at one point. “The key thing,” she says, “is what happens when homesickness hits.” In a 2007 study published in the Pediatrics Journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, homesick-ness is defined as “distress and

functional impairment caused by an actual or anticipated separa-

tion from home and attach-ment objects such as par-

ents.” Those who suffer from the condition

feel some form of

anxiety, sadness, and nervousness, and most distinctly, obsessive pre-occupation with thoughts of home. Homesick children are usually tearful and withdrawn. Yet with some simple wisdom and practical advice, parents will have the tools to set their child up for fun in the sun instead of tears on the pillow.

Parents, get your game face on

From time to time, parents may exhibit anxiety or sadness about the prospect of being away from their child. This, in turn, could make their child anxious. In terms of prepara-tion, parents’ attitudes are critical. “Successful campers have parents who transmit a feeling of excitement and possibility when talking about an upcoming camp,” says Kerri Augusto, co-director of BC5 Cheer Camp, an overnight camp held at Becker College in Leicester. “These parents focus on favorite activities and new experiences and opportuni-ties to make friends and, as a result, their children come to camp filled with positive expectations.” Less-successful campers, she adds, often have parents who allow their own anxieties to filter into the pre-camp conversation and offer options such as, “If you don’t like it, I’ll come get you” or “You can come home at any time.” “Though meant to provide a feel-

ing of security, these offers plant the idea that camp won’t be fun, and rather than work through the anxiety inherent in having a new experience, the child is likely to view any dis-comfort as a signal that it’s time to go home,” Augusto notes. Instead, parents should try nor-malizing the experience of possible homesickness and offer strategies their child can use in case sadness strikes. “Sometimes it’s nice to have some-thing from home that reminds the child of family,” Norvell says. “Let the child choose a photograph; pack an encouraging note from parents. Sometimes an object like a teddy bear brings comfort. When the child has benefitted from a discussion beforehand, they can swing right into recommended actions. It’s best to keep things simple: Tell a coun-selor how you feel. Take a look at the photo you brought, etc.”

Parents, put down the phone and get out a

pen & paper Experts advise parents to resist the urge to call, especially if their home-sick child is away only for a short time. Most likely, it will just increase distress for both parent and child. The American Academy of Pediat-rics study suggests “old-fashioned letters may be the best way to main-tain contact with home. They lack the emotionally evocative quality of

The truth about — and power of — conquering homesickness

BY HEATHER KEMPSKIE

Who’s

Missing

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Summer Programsa telephone call, and they require narrative reflection, which promotes understanding of one’s experience.” “Many parents will tell us that their child will ‘feel better knowing s/he can call me,’” says Augusto, also a professor of psychology at Becker College. “In fact, it is often the parent who feels better knowing there is a lifeline between parent-child at all times. A quality camp keeps children busy and provides opportunities to build relationships. Children, even as young as 5 or 6, will succeed best when they are allowed to be fully in the moment. A call from home takes them out of the moment and creates feelings of anxiety.” For those reasons, many camps have a “no phone” or “limited phone” policy. Augusto also notes that a parent who encourages communication at any time is likely to strip the child of opportunities for social growth by encouraging the child to invoke “helicopter parenting” when things become challenging. This denies camp counselors and staff the opportunity to assist the child with developing critical peer communica-tion and problem-solving skills.

Trust the camp Most camps provide their staff with training and strategies for helping

children cope with homesickness. They’ll even make a special point to celebrate their accomplishments on this front. Some camps may offer a reassuring alternative to direct contact, such as an assigned camp counselor who will contact parents to give updates on their child. “It can be harder for parents to watch from a distance than for chil-dren to experience,” ACA New Eng-land’s Norvell says. “Parents often feel a sense of kid-sickness. Parents are home with a hole in their lives, which the child typically fills, while the child is off at camp in a child-cen-tered world. With letters to parents and even for emails, which some camps now allow, often the child experiences the emotion, offloads, and then moves on. Meanwhile, the parents open an envelope days later and read the intensity of the feeling after it’s long-since passed!” Norvell encourages parents to fol-low the camp’s lead by “allowing camp professionals and staff to help your child succeed in a variety of ways.” She reminds parents: The flip side of homesickness is empowerment. “Such an experience builds resil-ience. Later they think, I worked through homesickness, I can conquer the next challenge, too,” Norvell adds. “Campers who adjust to a separation as school-age children have an easier time when college rolls around.”

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16 CAMPITUP2016!

Here’s a piece of advice: Don’t quibble about summer expenses under $50 because these expendi-tures appear regularly and usually balance out between both parents. Whichever parent finds a hole in their child’s sneakers or decides their son or daughter is in dire need of a haircut should just go to Target or Supercuts and get the job done.

Camp costs and tuition for other programs, however, require deeper pockets. Were these additional expenses addressed in your parent-ing agreement or divorce judgment? Were all costs to be shared between the parties? Did it further articulate that those costs should be shared in proportion to each parent’s income? Were all expenses to be approved in advance by the other parent, with none to be unreason-ably denied?

Going back to court each year to enforce an agreement — or to ask for a modification to address these issues — will cost you more than a camp, and you may not be able to convince a judge that summer camp is even necessary. Therefore, if you want your child to attend camp or participate in other summer pro-grams, you have two choices: pay for them yourself or secure your co-parent’s cooperation in sharing the costs.

Some parents may not see the need for a child to go to camp; they may feel that a little depriva-tion never hurt anybody, or that

children must learn they can’t participate in everything all the time. One co-parent may feel there’s nothing wrong with spending the summer hanging out at the park or at the town pool with cousins and grandparents, while the other par-ent thinks that every day should be scheduled and/or doesn’t want their child to miss out on an opportunity. However, both parents should con-sider what’s best for their child in making these decisions and figure out a way to make it work.

Start making summer

plans now Moms and dads who have experi-

ence in setting up summer plans know you have to start early to secure spots in popular programs. Add in the element of divorce, and co-parents should plan on spending at least a month to get the coopera-tion of an ex who isn’t the easiest person to get along with.

Best advice: Do your research early and then draft a proposal for your co-parent that contains all the details of the camp or program. Try to include two or three options so you’re not viewed as trying to shove your opinion down your for-mer spouse’s throat. Present these in such a way that you are asking — not telling — the other parent to be involved, and be sure to highlight how these plans are in the best interest of your child.

How Co-Parents Can Swing Summer Camp

BY IRWIN M. POLLACK, POLLACK LAW GROUP

For co-parents, the back-and-forth bickering over chil-dren’s expenses can seem like a nightmare, but the addi-tional expense of camp and other summer programs or activities carries an additional layer of stress that can lead to a breakdown in communication.

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